Good morning, girlies, it's The Toast.
It's Jax and Claude and we're your hosts.
It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly, it's The Toast.
I sound amazing.
Welcome back to The Toast and happy Friday!
It's Friday!
Yay, Viernes!
Yeah, I don't know. I like the weekdays.
Oh, you don't share my enthusiasm?
I like the weekdays too, you know? I like the structure. Like, I know that's like not cool.
You're just, you're kind of coming for the foundation in which the show is built, but okay.
I know, but like, I don't know, I, I like, like maybe it's just 'cause we're fresh off the heels of vacation and it's like I'm not sick of like this yet, but I'll miss you tomorrow, Codriel.
Oh, well, that's different. You missing me versus missing work.
I thought you meant Codriel.
Well, that's what happens when you have a coworker who just sort of—
Radiates light.
Brightens your day, radiates light and joy. Oh, I do wanna acknowledge the fact that like most people have seen Dune. I learned that yesterday.
Thank you for your acknowledgement, for your Dune acknowledgement.
We're doing a land acknowledgement here at the beginning of the toast.
And we'll do one at the beginning of every episode.
And yes, I know that Dune is popular because like it, you know, chops the tarts— tops the charts. I again just thought that they were like paying people to go see it, like bot energy.
Okay.
But no, I'm— I saw lots of people saying like, no, no, no, I saw Dune, loved it. Like, yeah, I don't know why I have such a hard time like understanding that, but I will try to move forward like and, and have my decisions be informed by that knowledge, you know?
And I just hope that in 6 months when this conversation comes up again, you know, our biannual review of Austin Butler that—
And his career at a glance.
We don't have to go through this again and that you remember the learnings.
Why are you saying you like that? You also like thought it was—
No, no, I said no, Claudia, like people like it and people see it. And, and you were like, no, they don't.
And I was like, oh man, no, you're throwing me under the bus now that we got proved wrong. Like you were also on my side, like historically. Should we pull it up?
Let's just pull it up. Let's like listen in real time instead of waiting and seeing and making a clip. Okay, clip. When did we talk about it?
Yesterday in the PFFB.
In the PFFB?
Yeah, we were talking about Austin Butler. Why?
Was it not because of Olivia Jade? And—
I don't think it was, actually.
That's shocking for us. We were talking about— because I was talking about Elvis, Can't Help Falling in Love.
Yes, see, I told you it was PFFB.
Because you were talking about Hairspray.
Songs you sing at night to your kids.
Yeah. We're never gonna find it, Koji. Oh wait, well, it was after my song. I don't know what that means.
Let's just move on.
If someone can get me a timestamp, that would be really helpful. We'll circle back.
I wanted to share something kind of wondrous that happened to me yesterday, and I've been telling people about this wondrous thing, and I have been encouraged to go buy a lottery ticket because I'm obviously like born under a lucky star this week.
Okay.
So I went shopping yesterday. I told you guys I had a work event last night. I'll tell you about it.
Yeah, we wanna hear about what you did for your anniversary that you were like teasing.
I needed a blouse and I always need a blouse and I always go shopping and I like, it's almost performative, you know? It's like, what am I even doing in this store? But I walked in, I found a blouse, they had my size on the rack, I tried it on and I bought it.
What was the store?
Bloomingdale's. So I had lots of options, but I go to Bloomingdale's a lot because of the different yogurt. What was the brand? Helmut Lang. It was kind of expensive, but I did have a $100 coupon, I did want to say, and I got 10% off because it had a little like stain at the bottom and they didn't have another one. She was like, I'll give you 10%.
I love that. Now you have to tell us what you did last night.
Oh, of course I will, but I just wanted to like marvel on the fact that I went to a store with a goal and I fulfilled that goal. Not only that, I bought the shirt I'm wearing. Like, I just grabbed it, like, cute little toe shirt.
Oh wow, look at you, shopper.
And guess where it's from?
Rails! Rails.
Yes, Rail Activists. Um, yes, I went to a work event last night that I turned into a romantic evening because, like I said, I had to go regardless. It was a commitment of mine, but it happened to have been an event that I thought my husband would really enjoy. And you know what? Enjoy he did. And of course, like, we got there, he knew everybody. Like, I didn't know anyone there and he knew everyone. It was a David Yurman event. They did this thing on West 4th Street, like in one of the, um, the West 4th Street courts. I don't know if you know it, it's like kind of like a famous basketball court in like the middle of the city. They took it over, they like made it like a fashion basketball court, and they had kids from the local league who are like amazing, like they're definitely like on the NBA track, um, from all over the city, like the Bronx, Brooklyn, Manhattan. And they played a scrimmage and each team was coached by Carmelo Anthony or Josh Hart, famous Knick. And then other Knicks were there like— Oh my God. KAT, Karl-Anthony.
Jordan was there. And, um, who's the other one? Jordan Clarkson. And it was just like Ben was in heaven. Like, we got to watch these kids who were like sick at basketball being coached by like Ben's idols.
Right.
And we got all dressed up. It was so fun and cute. And I got to wear like a borrowed diamond necklace that was definitely— I didn't even look it up. I need to look up how much it was. Um, but I was giving Andy Anderson in my borrowed jewels. And it was so much fun. And Ben, like, I think, I think he thought that like that was for him.
That's really perfect.
I know.
Very perfect, very simpatico.
Yeah, so I feel that I did my wifely duties.
So all in all, you had a good anniversary except for like the part of yesterday where we sort of like ragged on our husbands on our Patreon episode of Ick to Click.
Yeah, so kind of born out of—
That wasn't very anniversary-like.
Born— the thing is Ben doesn't subscribe to Patreon, so we're completely safe. Born out of a conversation we had about that guy who worships at church during Dear Toasters, Jackie and I decided to do an episode on our Patreon inspired by that, turning icks into clicks, 'cause we talk a lot a lot about how ick culture has gotten out of control. And sometimes, like, you just— like, you guys are looking too deep into ick, and like, it's almost like you want a reason to hate your husband. And we, we took submissions, we got some very interesting icks from you guys about what your partners do, and we tried to turn all of them into a positive. Kind of how, like, you guys think it's icky that that guy was worshiping too loud, but we think he's a God-fearing man and it's actually a positive thing. We tried to turn all the icks into positives. We obviously failed at that.
Really hard. And I feel like up until yesterday, I was like, icks aren't a thing, everyone's drama. But you guys submitted some very legitimate icks.
Yeah, who wears a robe. That was bad.
Which is an ick because it means he's not at work.
Correct. So we ended up like sort of centering ourselves in the episode and relating our husbands, which of these things our husbands do. And so yeah, I guess like it did turn into like a husband-bashing episode, but we're just sort of being honest and transparent, and I will never apologize for that.
Yeah. So happy anniversary to you.
So happy anniversary to me. Um, how are the stories?
They're light, I would say, like light fare.
Got it.
You know what I mean?
Not direct. Kind of like a menu at Estella? Light fare?
That was weird fare. Yeah, I won't yuck their yums.
No, of course.
Um, no, just like, you'll understand once we do the stories, like not super intellectually stimulating, like having major conversations on the geopolitical landscape.
Did you see Patrick Clancy's gonna be on CBS, uh, what's it called, 60 Minutes on Sunday?
I did. And did you see your boy the juror has self-identified?
I saw my boy the juror.
Your boy.
I also wanna say, 'cause I keep getting targeted for clips, like they know I'm like sat for this, the wife joins too. The new wife joins Patrick for part of the interview.
Yeah, that'll be interesting. I, I don't know if I'll watch. I haven't really like consumed a lot of this. Um, so I don't think I'll start.
I think compared to others, I also have not consumed a lot of it, but I've consumed more than you.
Yeah, so I don't know what I would like watch now, honestly.
I saw that the juror self-identified, and, um, perhaps it was to— like, it was coming out anyway, you know? It was just a matter of moments before people found out his identity. Um, and he's telling a completely contradictory story to the jurors who have spoken out, like, on CBS with Gayle King and all that. Um, he said he had like that she didn't—
they did not prove that she—
no, he said the evidence proved that she knew what she was doing.
Yeah. And it did not—
and the other jurors—
insane when she did it.
And the other jurors said that like in the jury room he said the opposite, and they told the judge that too. I'm like kind of a he said, she said.
I'm so biased.
Like, so am I.
Not only about the case, because obviously like I'm with our lone juror, but I'm also biased, like, about these people on the jury based on what I've seen them say and how I've heard them speak.
Extremely unlikable individuals. I completely agree. I am also biased, and I know we're supposed to be, like, when it comes to juries, like, completely up— no, I can't help it.
I'm judging the jury.
And that's, by the way, I'm the judge jury. That's my right.
I'm the judge jury and the judge of the jury.
The executioner. As is my motherfucking right. Like, When I saw those women on the local news, like, I just hated them.
And that guy.
Oh, I didn't see a guy.
Oh, I saw a guy. He was the one who was being like— the juror would be like texting on his phone. And then—
and he was also— when they got to the deliberation room, he was one who thought she would just be guilty, but he got swayed.
And he was the one who said like the lone juror was like— took a something and wrapped it around a water bottle to try and like simulate like, you know, how she killed her kids. And he thought that that was so strange and and bad, you know, worse than what she actually did, which was that with human beings. Like, why, why would it be relevant to show the ugly manner in which she killed her children?
Well, as that one really unlikable juror said, juror number 11 just could not get over the fact that Lindsay viciously killed her kids.
Yeah.
And for that, I stand with the lone juror. Hashtag I am the lone juror.
Yeah.
That's how it feels sometimes with my takes. Like, I'm the lone juror.
No, like, you've seen that meme that it's like a crowd of people and it's like one person.
You're wrong.
And it's like, you're all wrong. And sometimes it be like that.
1,000%.
For me, oftentimes it be like that.
Well, yes, for us, some more than others. But hashtag, I am the lone juror.
That's beautiful.
And I am a biased lone juror.
Yes.
Like, I can acknowledge my own bias. I hated those people.
Everyone who is like talking about the situation is biased at this point. Like, the people who are—
Of course.
You know, like, we all feel very strongly In one way or the other. These are very serious matters to be discussed.
Nuanced issues. I actually saw TMZ doing the Lord's work, waiting for Judge Judy outside of an appearance she was doing, and asked what she thought of the case. Of course, she adjudicated in a totally middle— she was like, well, she's guilty. That's not up for debate or anything. It's just more so about whether she has an excuse or not.
And Judy? Judith? What do you think?
She sort of left us on that cliffhanger.
What do you think, Judith?
If I know Judge Judy in the ways that I think I know Judge Judy, she's gonna say lock that bitch up and throw away the key.
Yeah, but—
But what do I know?
She's also the judge, not the jury.
It's not her job.
No, she's just there to like create law and order.
And then I also saw an update, um, kind of giving just like true crime podcast today. The Biermann child is home. $200,000 bond. And I don't know where they got that money from because they're always sort of like scraping together pennies and quarters. Well, you can put up collateral. Like your house, but I think they also don't have a house.
Your things. She has nice things.
Chanel bags, yeah. Um, so he's home.
Please like don't— please don't bring him up extraneously because the show sort of just like— it's hard to come back from that every day.
I know, I know. I just like, I don't want it to slip under the radar.
I know.
Do you know what I mean?
It's a hard— it's a fine line to walk of like not wanting to like But you're right, I'm bringing it up too much. Cover for them versus like now I have to like bounce back in the middle of the episode when things—
You're 100% right. What'd you do last night?
I went out.
What?
I did go out, but I like didn't like take a picture or anything, so you guys would never know. I actually meant to take a selfie in my car of Zach and I because I drove, but, but it's not in it.
That's so Patreon because we said like men who let their wives drive them, like—
But I was saying on the Patreon that we are the exception. One, I drove so Zach could drink.
Jackie's a sober queen.
Yeah, and we went out with 2 other couples and we had like a lovely dinner.
Oh my God, okay.
Like got the kids down, got out.
You see the steam coming out of my ears? What other couples?
Like some of your best friends.
Oh, I know these people. Oh, you went out with my friends?
No, no, I went out with my friends who you, who you like. Well, one couple I think you know and love, and then the other couple I don't know if you've met them. So like new friends too.
Wow. Well, I will be coming down to visit you quite shortly. I look forward to meeting and evaluating these friends, seeing if they're worthy, seeing if they're worthy of our time and energy.
Well, of course, once you're here, of course, then we're like a big group. Like, you know, then we have to get like the private dining room because everything's like a party of 8 or more. Then we have to invite Olivia.
Oh, private dining room. More restaurants need a private dining room.
No, but like once you're here, then like if we're going to dinner, like of course, like Olivia's coming with us and we're, we're set. And if we wanted to invite a friend, then we're at like like 8 individuals, 4 couples, and we need a private dining room.
Yeah.
We need that PDR.
But that's why sometimes you just have to leave your husbands at home because like, seriously, for the sake of the reservation, 'cause certain, you get above 6 people, you got a pre-fee.
Yeah.
You got, uh, automatically—
You can't make a reservation on OpenTable. You have to call the restaurant. Correct.
Correct. And that's why sometimes we have to leave the husbands at home. So I feel that's nice.
3 couples.
So in our future, 3 couples is the max.
The max.
Once there's a 4th, 5th, 6th couple, it's a girls' night.
I agree with that.
That's— and also like, it's kind of embarrassing to be like out at a table with 15 people. Like, what am I, 12?
I know, but it's like—
I have so many friends.
No, and it's like you just wanna like be inclusive.
Yeah, I guess.
And it's like, I don't get out so much, so like if I could see a lot of people.
I think at this stage in our lives, when you get to a certain number, like it has to become a dinner party at someone's home, you know? Mm-hmm.
Okay.
It's just a feeling though.
Okay, Claudia, I'll make a dinner party for you.
Like when I was in high school, We used to go out to dinner like every weekend. That was like the thing. And we were like a huge group of people. So maybe I just have like trauma from that, but I kind of wouldn't be caught dead at a table bigger than like 8.
I completely agree. Like group dinners.
It's so immature.
Group dinners are so immature. And then when like everyone pays for the birthday girl, that's where I reach my limit, bestie. The birthday girl who planned the dinner made everyone come. And then when the check comes, she's like, Oh no. Oh really? You guys shouldn't have.
I'm actually really proud of my group of friends because, um, like growing up when it was their birthday dinner, like they planned it and they paid for it. Like it was always the birthday person who paid.
That's beautiful. And then it all does even out because you wind up, instead of paying for 10 dinners, you pay for 10 people one time.
Exactly. It's net zero.
So it's all the same.
1,000%.
But just like it feels better.
Yeah.
It feels better. I did get the timestamp for Dune, like if we just wanna like close the loop on that and then we can go.
Okay. I hate listening to the sound of my own voice and I know so many others agree.
We're hysterical. Except I heard myself say something yesterday, like in situ. Like I was in a situation, not on the show, like—
In situ? Can we just go back to that really quickly?
In situ.
What does that even mean?
I heard it.
What does that even mean?
I heard it in the moment. Like I could hear myself. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Like you were live listening.
I was so obnoxious.
Oh, I've been there before. That's just like what happens when you hate yourself. Like, it is what it is.
I hadn't had the experience before where it was like my own voice like gave me—
It's like, did I just say that?
Like, did I sound like that?
Yeah, your own voice gave you like an exact moment talking about it.
No, there was someone that I ran into, someone that I knew that I hadn't seen. I said her name and like the way that I said it, it's like, Dani!
Okay, Jackie, that's exactly how I felt when I saw Alex Earle at the wedding. Like, I heard my own voice and wanted to die. And I almost— I saw my own facial expression too and wanted to actually be dead.
The good news is she was in the other room. I had heard that she was in the house, so I like shouted. I was like, Dani!
Oh my God.
Just— it was just like, that's my voice.
I've never seen you like so enthusiastic. Who did you see?
I saw someone who I never would have expected.
Is Dani her real name?
Yes, yes. Oh, like— no, not our friend. Okay, okay. Um, I'll tell you, like, no one here will care, but you'll— when I tell you, you'll understand why I was shocked to see her and in this environment.
Was it Danny Trejo?
Who's that?
Oh my God, you're disgusting.
Oh, just go. The, the actor, this esteemed actor. It was not Danny Trejo.
Okay, let's listen. And let's talk about Austin Butler doing that movie.
Austin, yes. Austin.
And how it kind of like, in my opinion, ruined his career.
He didn't have a career before, so—
He didn't have one after either.
He just sort of kept thinking— it went like this.
Yeah, right.
And then back down. Like, it was a spike.
Like it never happened.
But other people say Dune and he's in this and he's not.
I'm sorry, nobody on the planet is ever going to convince me that Dune is a successful franchise. And I know, like, you could show me figures, you could show me— It is.
You know that it is. But it's not.
It's giving, like—
Thank you.
You know, like only bots have been doing this. Oh my God, you're so glad we did this, you fucking bitch.
No, I disagree, but I understand where you're coming from.
I understand. Shout out in the comments, like, have you ever watched Dune? I just don't believe. And maybe it's because I don't know You know what you're giving in that clip? Like, literally so spineless. You're like, it is, but it isn't.
No, no, no, I understand what I'm saying, but I also realize how you can argue both, both sides, both of like what you said, that I'm agreeing with you. The thing is, it's like, I am agreeing with like your opinion that it feels like that, but I'm also saying objectively it's not like that.
I'm glad we did this exercise because I feel that it cleared up nothing.
I feel, yeah, maybe I'm just like confusing, but I feel like I know what I meant.
I understand you.
You understand me?
I do.
Okay, let's dive in. So now we can get into the Fast Five stories that you need to know.
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Thank you, Turtvival.
You're welcome, Nickvile.
Our first story, Lady Gaga and Michael Polanski welcomed a baby girl and her name has been revealed. So we've gotten a little more info confirmation on the Bebe Polanski. Um, they welcomed a baby girl named Rose Bean Polanski on June 9th, 2026, according to documents obtained by People. TMZ was the first to report the news.
Much like Cynthia Erivo, we didn't know that was happening in June.
I saw that it was confirmed via surrogate.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, okay, La Vie en Rose. I love this.
La Vie en Rose Bean.
Rose Bean. Lady Gaga is like a traditional New York Italian. Like, obviously we know her as Lady Gaga, but she's just Stefani Germanotta, like, to, to those that know her best. And she's just a girl from New York, you know? And yeah, she's gonna name her baby Rose. Like, it makes perfect sense.
It's beautiful.
It's beautiful.
Yeah, I think she is the type to actually be, um, ordinary, violent in her life, so she can be violent and original in her work and in her art.
1,000%. Her art is nuts.
It's violent.
It's difficult to understand.
It's violent and original.
I think, I think if, you know, not to bring up her documentary, but what we know about her is she's very traditional. She wants, you know, to get married and have kids, and she did just that. And she wasn't going to name her baby Apple, you know.
Rose. No, I love it. Flaubert would be proud.
She kind of is the walking embodiment of that quote. That meant so much to me that one time.
If you guys— do you want to hear the quote? Do you guys need a refresher?
Yeah, Jackie heard a quote once that she like loved so much she actually wrote it down and shared it with us. And at first I didn't understand it.
Do you understand? I feel like you might understand it more now. Let me read it again. Let me, um—
You know, I do understand it. I don't think it like applies so heavily to us.
Be regular and orderly in your life so that you may be violent and original in your work.
Yeah, like I said, I obviously get it, but not in such a personal way.
Okay.
When we apply Flo Burt to Gaga, it makes perfect sense.
Well, that's what she's doing for sure.
She's a very extreme version of it.
Yes, she is.
Well, congrats, Ben Saltov.
Yeah, very, very exciting. And then also our second story is some more baby news because Millie Bobby Brown has welcomed baby number 2. with her husband Jake Bongiovi. They welcomed their second baby together through adoption, a source told People magazine, as they did their first baby.
Adoption is very beautiful. This is— she keeps surprising us, you know. I don't really know a lot about her because I never got on the Stranger Things, like, train, so I just know her as, like, a celebrity, and she just keeps continuing to surprise me.
Yes, and being, like, very mature. And also, she doesn't explain. She doesn't, you know, give everyone every bit of information. It's just like like, this is what we've done.
TTYL. TTFN.
Yeah.
No, I love this. Adoption is very beautiful.
Yeah. I wonder when did they adopt their first child. I remember that was a year ago.
Okay.
It says August 2025, so one year.
Close in age.
Yeah.
It's really sweet.
It is really sweet. That's really nice. That's what I said, the stories are light today.
Yeah, it's like, for all these people, I don't know what to say besides like, good for you.
Like, yeah, no, when there's like baby news or pregnancy news, like, it's just like so happy.
Or it's similar to like when somebody passes away. It's like there's really not much to say except like, sorry that happened.
Exactly, exactly. Um, so are you ready for our 3rd story? Was actually in 2 parts. This is the little slow-mo updates. Yes, McKayla Matthews announces she's donating a portion of her Secret Lives of Mormon Wives salary after her sudden departure. So So, Mikayla Matthews is continuing to like speak out and talk about like why she's left. She posted like 2 photos of herself as a young girl and said, I am leaving the show because of this girl.
Did you see like she had all those bruises on her arm?
I did.
So she's talked about it on the show, but she like, you know, grew up in an abusive home.
Yes.
So I think that she takes all these things about Taylor, like she takes it even more seriously than anyone.
But then she's talked on the show about like the sexual abuse. Um, and then she's now saying like there were multiple forms of abuse in the home. So what other forms that might relate to like Taylor and Dakota, like could be of like, you know, emotional, triggering, verbal, drug abuse? Yeah, I don't know what they are, but like there's obviously a lot of things that are like mirrored there.
Yeah, and she wants no part of it, like zero.
Yes. So she said—
so she wrote this like long post. It was very emotional.
It was. And I actually feel like when she announced that she was leaving, it's like I'm so with her, but there's like, there's, it's not a her or Taylor situation because they're never going to like choose her. She's never going to like be more popular than Taylor. The network's never gonna choose her over Taylor. But I feel like this is picking up a lot of steam.
Well, I think people really respect it. Like nobody, everybody walks the walk and nobody talks the talk. I feel like in this particular group too, it's not like a particularly principled group. They're all just like, whatever the fans think. Like they're just so afraid of getting canceled or getting mean comments that like to see somebody just walk in their own path and make their own decisions and and give up a lot. It's so admirable. Like, I have no choice but to have like the most respect for her ever.
No, same. But I feel like the more that she posts, the more it's sort of like putting the onus on Hulu. Like, are you really—
It's true.
Going to let this girl go as the more and more comes out about Taylor? Like, we're— it's— oh, I'm the— for the first time I'm like, maybe you shouldn't choose Taylor over her. Like, and the more—
And I just— I know how the entertainment, like, how it works. Like, they're obviously always just gonna choose Taylor.
And that's what I thought 2 days ago, but now I feel like there's so much momentum behind Mikayla that it's like really disgusting if they continue down this path.
Not to put it on them because they would never— like I said, this is genuinely like the most spineless group of women— but like if they all walked, or a couple of other like major— if Macy left, if Jesse said I'm also going— they would never. But if they did, it might move the needle for Hulu a little bit.
I feel like that's what a little bit what the production pause was. Oh, a little bit. And it didn't go their way, you know, because— and then the video came out and still like they're— and now they have officially said like Taylor will be on the next season. And so they chose Taylor.
You're right, you're right about that.
Um, so this is what she said. This little girl is a huge part of why this whole situation has mattered so much to me and why I haven't been able to stay silent about it and will never stop talking about it. When I said there's no amount of money worth changing my stance on all this, I meant it. So I will be donating the money I would have made from the rest of the season to the National Children's Alliance, which supports children and families affected by multiple forms of abuse.
Walking the walk and talking the talk.
Yeah, 'cause like we said, she's gonna be on more episodes. They're already filmed, and so she's going to use that money and donate it.
No, I'm sorry, like, I just have enormous respect for her, and I just didn't think like a Secret Life of Mormon Wife would be like, seriously, the most— would be doing like what I consider to be the most respectable thing I've like literally reported on this year. It's just, I didn't expect it and I love her. And it is disappointing that that's the way like the world works. They'll never get rid of Taylor. Like, she's the engine. And yeah, she did start it, but like the show at one point was like silly and fun and like we could just go back to that. Like, it doesn't have to be about like child abuse and calling CPS. Like, it could just be like, remember when they used to fight about like Fruity Pebbles?
Like, that was fun.
We enjoyed that. Yeah. And it's like, what, remember when Demi was like, I wanted more money from production? Like, that was fun. Like, it was silly.
We were young.
No, I don't have any more tolerance for like Taylor and Dakota.
I didn't to begin with. That's never been my cup of tea.
Yeah. And again, she's all over social media, her healing journey, um, and it's just like the crazier things get in reality, the more her social media like has no idea what's going on in the real world. Like, her social media is insane.
No, and her social media just like ignores it and it's all like, yeah, it will all— the truth will all come to light. I haven't said my piece. And when I do, and it's just like— You're wrong, you're wrong, just wait, just wait. Not addressing what's going on. Girl, you have 8 hours a week with your children.
Do you understand that? Oh, and then I watched a portion of her Zoom court where Dakota's lawyer actually— and like, I hate that I'm even like representing Dakota, but it's like he had laid out before she got down to 8 hours, I think she had 50 hours a week, and he went through like one particular week Where she ended up using 16 of her 50 hours. She showed up late this day, she returned the kids early that day. And this is just with Ever. I don't know what goes on with the 2 older kids, but he had pretty much laid out the schedule of like one particular week where she wasn't even using her hours.
What?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jeez. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm out.
Yeah, I am also out.
I've— and but you've been out.
Well, I feel like we sort of like— because I do, I, I can, you know, hold space for 2 truths that like Dakota is definitely abusive in a lot of psychological ways, but at a certain point when your kids are involved, I feel that you can only be so much of a victim of your own life and I think that they both abuse one another in various ways. And her refusal— her acknowledgement of the cycle but refusal to get off the cycle— for, uh, you know, a mom of 3, like, I do expect more of you. I just do.
No, and also, like, in this season at least, she's like, but I love him.
Grow up.
Nobody cares that you love him.
Nobody. He's also ugly, like, needs to be said.
Like, you guys were together for, like, less than a year happily before It's so true. It's been now like 5 years of chaos.
He fucked your mom's friend!
No, like nobody— okay, so you love him, who cares? Like, that's not— that doesn't mean anything.
It's sort of neither here nor there.
Like, when nothing else is working.
And his list of crimes, like, it was like, there was— before things got really dark every season, it was like that Jenna girl, the mom's friend, the aunt.
Shania.
Shania, like, could we be done?
Yeah.
Like, seriously, can we be done?
No, no, no, I know. I know you know. Everybody knows.
Now, um, yes, I am officially like off. Yeah, I was, I was trying to like toe the line a little bit, like hold space for 2 truths, but like I don't, I don't hold that space anymore.
8 hours is sort of like it for me.
Yeah, the space is closed.
Um, our next story, part 2, sorry, of Secret Lives is that Secret Lives of Mormon Wives star Leila Taylor reveals that she is writing a memoir. She shares the title and the release date for her upcoming memoir. So the name of her memoir is Bless you. Are you ready?
Thank you. Yeah, I had seen it and I remember like being confused by it. So what was it again?
The Man of My House. She says— oh, actually, yeah, it's a title that she feels a lot of other mothers will be able to relate to. She said, it's just a story about my life from childhood up until kind of recent days, just kind of everything that I've experienced. I've shared a decent amount on the show, but there's honestly so much that I haven't shared, and I'm really excited for viewers and just followers of mine to be able to learn more about me and why I am the way I am and why I operate the way that I do. And just separate me from Secret Lives, the raw and inspiring memoir due from Crown Publishing Group, teased during the season 5 premiere episode, reveals Taylor's story of surviving abuse in her childhood home and the strength she found to build a life that never felt possible.
I think that all of the Mormon wives could write novels because like they all have these like really fucked up backgrounds, like childhoods or relationships. Like Macy was saying she was in an abusive relationship when she was in college. Like, these are just women who have like lived through difficult things. And so I think that any— and they have so many like followers and fans that any of their books would be successful. I also think this is like Leila's first attempt to like step up out of the tier that she's currently in, which I would consider the bottom tier, her and Miranda, of like sort of kind of give like friend of vibes.
But they're also like on the show the most because they're the most available.
Available, yes, 1,000%. Uh, so I'm curious if this will take her to the next level. I don't feel like Macy's book really blew up.
Really? Yeah, I don't know. I was just trying to understand if it did or not.
Like, I think, you know, because they just have so many fans, like the numbers, they all will be— I'm sure Maci's was, and I'm sure Leila's will be New York Times bestsellers. But I mean, like, does it expand outside of the Secret Lives bubble?
I don't know. But also Maci, like, I feel like Maci's book was different because I feel like whether or not she ever became famous, like, she wanted to write a book, right, about her story. And that just—
her fiancé—
that's just like who she was. So when she became famous, it was like the first thing she was gonna do because that's— but then like everyone else, if anyone else writes a book after that, it's just like you're a reality star who got a book deal.
Yeah.
Not to say that you shouldn't and that this won't be good and that you don't have a lot to say. As far as the title, I like it.
I do too.
I feel like it could be like The Man of the House, not My House. Like, 'cause that's the saying, it's like the man of the house.
Yeah, and also I could drop the the. Man of the House.
Man of My House would be—
It's a little chewy.
Yeah, the my is tripping me up.
Agreed, you're absolutely right.
But as far as memoir titles we've seen recently, I would say this is upper tier.
When the Luck Jumps In? What was that one called?
Aina's The Luck Runs Out.
Yeah.
Be Ready When the Luck Hits.
Yes.
Was that it?
Yes. When we think of like best and worst memoir titles, it's just funny that it goes like Reza Farahan best, Aina Garten worst, you know?
Dorit Kemsley worst.
Worst.
Adam Burdend.
And that should be Kamala's memoir title. What was hers? 107? That wasn't a memoir, it was just like a story, a retelling. Yeah.
So good luck to Leila. Comes out next June, so see you then.
Oh, TTFM.
Are you ready for our next story? Some biz news for the girlies and podcasting news. SiriusXM welcomes Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo's Giggly Squad podcast in what is reported to be a 3-figure Millions deal. How would you say that?
Hundreds of millions deal? I would say the streets are saying $150 mil for 4 years. That's unreported, unverified, but I saw somebody say that.
The streets are saying $150 million offers from 3 different networks. So if those were the offers, that's probably what they accepted.
Now this is insane for 1,000 reasons. One of the reasons is, I feel like nobody's even acknowledging this, is like I do feel that this truly unseats Alex Cooper.
As the number one female podcaster?
Because we were always like with her deals and it's like, that's sort of like the title she's given herself, like the biggest female podcaster, even though maybe like, and I mean like swirly, 'cause the biggest female podcaster is the True Crime Girls.
Crime Junkies.
My favorite, yeah, whatever those ones are, yeah. But she's sort of like the female Joe Rogan.
So yeah, we could say like in like the pop culture news world, Society Culture category. Yes.
And she got a deal for $125 million, which reports say that she actually probably won't even earn that $125 million because it's based on like a bunch of—
Oh, that number was $125 million. I didn't remember.
Yes, yes. Oh, I did. Um, so I feel that this is a major win for Gigli, obviously because they got $150 million, but because there's kind of like new queens in town, I feel.
Yes, I, I didn't even think about it compared— plus also the—
And also she's also at Sirius.
And but the Alex Huber deal was an Unwell deal, so it was also the other podcast, which of course—
Exactly.
They're not called Her Daddy, but it was like a group effort.
And there was like all this like live programming. She had her own channel.
I know.
Like a bunch of the shows ended.
I had to borrow Olivia's car for a while and they have SiriusXM in there. And so I was like going through the stations and I listened to Unwell Radio like a couple times.
Yeah, well, it's like, it's like millennial core radio.
Yeah, yeah, it was good.
Yeah, I think it's built for us. They also like created like live programming.
Oh, like those shows?
Like shows.
But those shows are no-mos.
They were all, I think, went out of business. They tried to do a daily pop culture show.
The show no-mo.
And then there was like an advice show, and I'm pretty sure all of them are over.
Yeah.
So that's what I mean. Yeah, the $125 was not just for Alex, it was for Unwell and all the shows that they were promised that they were gonna get. But this is like, here, change nothing, do your show, and here's your $150. I did read that they also are doing like some other stuff with Sirius. I'm sure we'll find out what that is. Yes. Maybe like live shows.
Yes. I've heard that too. There'll be like some other things in addition to just like $150,000 for the podcast, but it's really $150,000 for the podcast.
And it's also great because I feel like when we talk about these deals, they're not always going to the swirlies. Like, it's all the, the Smartless and Joe Rogan, and it's like these big deals going to a girly show, like, is huge.
It's major for TGS. I agree. Or, or just like women in general. It's not a— but podcasting, like, is is very male-dominated.
No, but we talk about these a lot. Like, they get people who get these huge deals.
No, I know, like New Heights, Smartless.
New Heights, yeah. And it's like, well, what about the swirlies?
But also—
And here they just come and like took a shit on everybody else's deal. $150 million.
For sure.
This is the highest I've heard besides Joe Rogan. Smartless was $100 million, New Heights was $100 million.
Jay Shetty was $100 million.
Yeah.
But they have to split. We know about that.
Giggly also has to split.
Giggly has to split, I'm saying.
Yeah.
Giggly—
Oh, I thought you meant Smartless. Smartless has split 3 times.
Yeah, but like Jay Shetty got $100 million, but he's just one Jay.
And that's how you do it, Jay.
Also, another female podcaster to watch— I don't know if she had a big deal yet, but she will— is Amy Poehler.
Oh, ugh. Yeah, she's not— ugh, sorry, because like, it's just, it's easy to be a successful podcaster when you already have success. That's why like what Hannah and Paige did is so impressive, because it's like, yeah, they had like things going on, but like not—
But like every reality TV star has a podcast, every influencer has a podcast. And I actually I disagree a little bit about the Amy Poehler thing. I think she would be a successful podcaster 'cause of who she is. But like, just because you have success does not mean that you will have a successful podcast.
No, of course. But like, you sat down in your first episode with a bit of infrastructure, right? Like you had a whole production team. Your first guest was like—
So did Emily Ratajkowski.
Yes, yes. No, it's not, it's not a guarantee.
No.
But it's less, in my opinion, it's less impressive than Paige and Hannah.
Oh, agreed. But I'm not gonna compare. But no, it's very, I know people, we make it look easy and every, you make it look easy. Oh my God. But it's very hard to have a successful podcast.
Yes, and just because you like have success and, and, or even if you have lots of fans does not equal successful podcast. And I think that the Giggly Squad thing is even more impressive because like Hannah sort of came as like this phoenix. People have loved Paige forever. She's sort of like always been adored. Hannah was like this sort of phoenix rising from the ashes. There was a period where it's like, girl, what will be of you after Summer House and like before her comedy took off? And that's why it probably feels even fucking better for her.
No, it's actually unprecedented.
It's unprecedented. I love that.
I can't think of an example of someone who was like—
Who's come back so hard.
Reality TV and like soared to greater heights.
Yeah, you know, she's kind of in her own league.
I'll noodle on it, but I really can't. So this is majorly impressive.
It's majorly impressive.
And well earned.
And well earned. They're always giving it to people who have been podcasting for like a year, like I know, and I love New Heights, but like getting $100 mil when you've literally had one year and you had your like most famous wife on, like it's just kind of giving like handout. This is like, they've been podcasting like just as long as us, in the trenches, on their couch, like keep leveling up. It's nice to see like a slow progression of people who like I feel are genuinely talented.
Yeah.
And like earned every listener.
Yeah.
Not just like overnight success. Like not me coming for New Heights, but like you know what I mean? It happened so quickly.
I didn't expect this to be like the New Heights I love New Heights, I just wanna say.
And I think that they actually have lasted outside of the Travis and Taylor hoopla. People still tune into their show, both sports people, pop culture people. I think they actually do an amazing job. I thought the deal was a little premature at the time.
Yeah, but no, there's—
It was a little risky. I feel like SiriusXM will make their money on Giggly Squad in these next 4 years.
Yes, it's—
I felt that when Amazon gave New Heights their $100 million, it was TBD. I think they'll make out fine, but I thought it was a little, a little premature.
Yeah, but also sometimes like these companies like pay knowing they're not gonna get all their money back, but it's like—
For the vanity almost.
Yes.
Yeah.
Um, so mazel tov.
Yeah.
Are you ready for our 5th and final story?
Oh my goodness, no.
I think it's ready for the sauce.
I think it's ready for the jelly. Is it the 5th and final story that's brought to you by David Protein?
Yes, it is.
And kind of major news, I thought this was the biz news you were referring to, is that David's is now available at Walmart stores nationwide and at walmart.com.
It would have been the 6th story.
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My husband loves them, but I've been seeing like all these people just out in the streets drinking David's Protein shakes.
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5th and final story, Kardashian season 8 trailer on Hulu has been released.
Are they saying that it's been 8 seasons of the Hulu show? That's crazy.
They're very short, like it's really not that— like a season is not what it used to be.
No. Um, I saw— I watched a trailer.
So we got our first look at season 8 of The Kardashians, which premieres on Thursday, October 8th on Hulu. So I think that means like Friday in Hulu language.
Um, I don't know.
Yeah, you know, because it comes out like at like 10 PM and then everybody watches it Friday, but people have already written up articles, so it sort of spoils everything that's gonna be in the episode unless they've figured that out already.
Let's put it on at 8 o'clock and then we're good.
Um, yeah, exactly, 8 o'clock Eastern time. Thanks. So the show teasing relationship for Kim, you know, Kourtney's distance from her family, uh, Kim's getting a surgery. Kris says it's all crazy here. Scott and Khloé pretend like they're having a child together.
This could literally be any season of The Kardashians. Like, Kendall— I knew that they were scraping the bottom of the motherfucking barrel when I saw Kendall being like, people think me and Cara Delevingne are dating. It's like, we thought that a decade ago.
No, and also she didn't even say that. She said—
They thought we had sex.
That, yeah, they think that we had sex.
Such a weird way to say it.
It was a really weird way to say it. And like, I just feel like she's never escaping those pick-me allegations. Like, it's so true the way that she said it. And she was like, and never say never. Like, girl, you have a boyfriend, just stop.
No, and it's like, what you're trying to say is like, there were rumors, like just sort of like theories that Kendall might be gay like a couple of years ago, just because she's like the only one who like didn't have a kid yet or whatever. And it was just, it was so unfounded, and it was just like based on vibes. Like, it was not—
it was based on vibes. Yeah.
And so like, if you want to address it at the time, cool, but like, we don't care anymore.
Yeah, she said there's definitely a rumor that Cara and I dated, which is not true.
By the way, not the rumor. The rumor is that you're gay, not that—
By the way, I have nothing against having sex with Cara. Never say never.
Oh, that's good to know. Clearing the homophobic allegations. Like, this is just like so uninspired. And I hate to be like a Kardashian hater because I'm not, but I'm definitely just not in my era. And I was in my era for like 5 years. Like, they were my number ones. I just find this so uninspiring, and there are a couple of them that I could seriously just like watch do nothing, and that's Kris, that's Kylie, a little Khloé. The rest don't really do it for me, and like the sort of— the season seems to hinge on this Kourtney drama for the 8th year in a row.
Right, she's distant from her family. They never see her. They feel like Travis is keeping her from her family. Meanwhile, Simon Huck says that's the worst read ever.
So it's— she's 47 years old, and I remember the first time they were arguing about Kourtney like being distant from the family. They— I think it was actually on the E! show. They were talking about how maybe her 40th birthday coming up is like having her have this midlife crisis, and that's why she's being so mean to us. So that's when it started. It's been 8 years that we're talking about Kourtney. Yeah, it's not enough for me anymore unless they're gonna slap each other again. Like, we need to kind of discover new plots.
Yeah, and I think the answer is Kylie. Just give us more Kylie.
Give us more Kris. I'm telling you, like, she's deeply interesting.
Yeah, but she needs—
You know how they did The Girls, like that Hulu show?
They need to have the women with Kris and her friends.
Yes, Faye Resnick, like all the fans, Kathy Hilton.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills though, because those are her friends.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right, you're right, you're right.
Um, more Scott. I like Scott.
Sure.
We'll see how I feel. I mean, it always shifts like when I watch the season and And the show that is on Hulu, like, is good. Every time I watch it, I enjoy it.
It's enjoyable.
It's like mindless and enjoyable. But yeah, the way that I— there was like a time, and I've gone through waves, but like a couple years ago just felt like very much a kinship to them that I don't feel right now.
Yeah, and I think like for their own health and well-being, they've sort of pulled back. The show like used to be like a true diary of everything that was going on, and we'd hear about these huge scandals in the media and then read about what— see what really happened a few months later. And I feel like they don't have that relationship with the show anymore. It's sort of like just a job love for them, and they film and like—
And it's like ads for their brands, and it's very light and fluffy.
It's less personal.
Yeah.
And they were— they, they did their time. Like, they have decades of like truly showing us everything. So I feel that there was like an intentional shift made by a lot of the girls to just like share more mindlessness and promotional and like not so deep and real. And that's fine. I actually really respect that decision, but I'm bored.
Yeah, no, I don't even think they're like not trying to share so much. I I don't know, it's just, I feel like Khloe's always really open about like whatever she's struggling with, whether it's Tristan, whether it's getting out of the house, whether it's, you know, child rearing. Like, I feel like she's open. And Khloe's not really my issue. It's just, I don't know, the tone of the show, it just, I don't feel close to it.
I agree.
But we'll see. Let's see how this season ends. I'll watch it because as I said, like, it's better than most.
Agreed.
Are you ready for Queenie and Weenie?
Yes, our final segment of the week. Every Friday, Jackie and I just like, you know, sort of slow down, take a look back at the week, all the things that happened at a glance, and give out 2 awards: Queenie and Weenie of the Week. It could be, you know, something that happened to us personally, something happened in the media, celebrity who acted like a queenie. It's a very lighthearted segment. Don't take it too seriously. You could be queenie one week, weenie the next. Like, if you commit a crime, you're not gonna be a weenie. Um, so let's go. Queenie first.
Queenie first, always.
I'm pretty sure we have the same Queenie, because I think when you walk with so much integrity and respect and like true values, you need to be rewarded for it.
Michaela Matthews.
Michaela Matthews.
Very much Queenie, the essence of Queenie behavior, really.
Yes, and I also think she's emblematic of like how your opinion can really change so quickly of people. She was my least favorite for so long, and I feel like you don't really know anything about people watching them on reality TV. Like even a show like Salama, which like really shows you a lot. And it's like, I feel like this is who she really is. I feel pretty strong in that. So I think she deserves all of our respect.
I agree. Honorable mention to Robert Kraft. Any other week, Robert Kraft would've been the queenie.
Also honorable mention to Alex Earle for sort of like recognizing us and what we do on Sunday night.
Yes. And to Sally just for being Sally.
Of course.
Always like a good default Queenie when in doubt.
Now my weenie is deeply personal. Um, I would like to discuss something I haven't actually shared yet. I put it on my Instagram recently.
Sort of like breaking news from this morning.
Something—
Actually the first thing I saw when I woke up, which just set a negative tone for my day.
Something so horrible happened to me. that I actually— when things like this happen, and they happen sometimes, it makes me want to quit my job. And I happen to love my job. Like, I don't wake up feeling like, oh, I have to go to work. Like, I love my job.
Yeah.
Yesterday we posted a clip, just a brief conversation that we had had, um, on the toast. I would like to play the clip, please, actually, because I haven't seen it.
And so, like—
And knowing what I'm about to tell you, your butt will clench when you hear some of the shit.
Oh my God. Okay.
And, um, and I want to tell you guys that it's about Dancing with the Stars. and Derek Hough saw the video and commented on it. I will read the comment, but here's what Derek Hough heard, okay?
I'm so frightened because I said nice things about him. Did any of them make it in the clip?
It's not about you.
Did any? No, but just know, like, if you listen to the segment, I said he was an amazing dancer and he reminded us what ballroom should look like.
Why don't Julianne and Derek get their own, like, solo performances? Because they're like the king and queen of Dancing with the Stars.
Yeah, but I feel like if somebody wants a solo performance, they could have one, but I think it's really only Julianne and Derek raising their hands.
I think as people get eliminated and the throws free up, then we'll get some other solo performances. But like, it was just giving like their Sweet 16, you know? I was just cracking up. I mean, it was obviously no Paris Baguette, but it was something.
I would say Derek's performance made a bigger impression on me than Paris Baguette.
No, no, no, no. I am the woman I am today because of what I saw at Paris.
The best call ever made was that Derek Hough is to Dancing with the Stars what Robert Herjavec is to Shark Tank for you.
You made that call? Okay, that's interesting. And explain yourself.
They're just like the same energy of like, they're totally nice guys.
No, they're not.
And you just hate both of them. You think like they're both hacks, they're both ugly, stupid, and annoying.
I do think Robert Herjavec is a hack. I think he was like the least eligible Shark. Like, he was lucky to be there. I don't think Derek Hough is a hack. Like, I think he's the most successful, talented performer. But it's a good comparison, but it's not a perfect one. Okay, so Derek Hough saw that and left a comment. Production needed 3 minutes to tally votes at the end of the night. The pros in the troupe were already maxed out with their multiple numbers, and we were glad to help out and do what we love. Hope that answers the why. Also, Robert is a good dude. So the— like, here's the thing, and, and in the context of Queenie and Weenie of the Week, I am making Derek Hough my Weenie of the Week. Because if you are going to show up like in my comment section, like, I can't do my job. And I think like you're on the big— you're on the biggest show in the world. Like, you kind of need to like leave me alone. And if things like this continue to happen, I will not be able to share my like unfiltered truths.
And even though Net Net, like what I said about Derek Hough, I actually don't like dislike Derek Hough really at all.
It wasn't a total roast.
No, it wasn't. I think he's a great dancer, but I was wondering like, why do they run around that set acting like it's like their dad's like, nepo, like, what is this? And I think that's a feeling that is within the dance community, like, of the show. People are like, why don't anybody else get their own dances? And so you showing up and like commenting on— like, you're too big, you're not supposed to be here.
Yeah.
And I think that you really hinder us journalists from doing our job, and you need to stop, and weenie.
Yeah, I will say, like, I appreciate— I wish he never, you know, spoke up and let us know that he saw this, but But okay, like, now I understand why he did that dance when he did it, because they were telling him.
No, I'm sorry, it doesn't answer. It means they need a dance. They need 3 minutes to tell you.
Everyone else was dancing their hearts out.
Oh please, those people cannot stop dancing. They could have done another one. Why it's always like Derek and Julianne, that was my question, and I don't feel that he answered it.
Yeah, and it's just like, that's my nightmare, you know?
No, but it's like, you, you just, you sort of have to stay out of it. Like, part of being like a part of pop culture is like the commentary.
Yeah.
And you like commenting on it. Like, seriously, stop. I feel awkward. Like, I want to die. And is that what you want, Tarikov? Like, stop. And this was the worst thing that ever happened to me, honestly. It's reminding me of your Michaela Matthews thing.
Yeah, it's really bad. It just makes you want to stop, like—
And that's what I mean. Like, you're at the center of culture— Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, Dancing with the Stars. Like, you just have to leave us alone. Sometimes I'm scrolling TikTok and I see, and I see like stuff about us.
I always, you know, and I like want to like comment on it. I want to, and I'm like, why would I comment on that? Like, where?
No, unless they're talking about like how beautiful and skinny I am, I comment. I'm like, love you, queen. But like, if it's just like commentary on the toes, like, I hate those girls.
Like, I'm not gonna comment on that. And it's like, oh, I have a perfectly logical explanation, um, but I'm not gonna give it to you.
Of course. Like, oh my God, this actually bothers me.
It's like, let us do our thing.
I'm going through the stages of grief. Like, first I was embarrassed and now I'm annoyed.
Yeah, it's always rough when it happens. And I think the lesson for us, like, if we really hate the experience of it happening— though it does, like, you know, it's buzzy and whatever, but I just, I personally don't enjoy the experience— it's like not to clip things.
I'm sorry, that clip performed extremely well. I'm like, this is a business.
Then okay, so stop feeling sad. This is a business.
Like, I'm not sad anymore, I'm angry.
You know, like, don't take it personal, it's business.
How about that? I didn't take it personal. I did not take it personal. I think that people should just act right. I'm sorry if I'm crazy for that.
Yeah, yeah. But that was like the thing with Jace. It's like, no, in the future I wouldn't clip Weenie of the Week because like that's a treat for getting through the whole week with us.
And I guess a good like rule moving forward is that we shouldn't clip who Weenie of the Week is. You have to tune in to find out.
Yeah, no, and it's like out of context it seems like, you know, mean-spirited. And people don't realize that you could be Queenie one week and Weenie the next, and vice versa. So yeah, that was the takeaway for me from Jace. Like, if you don't know what we do here, that sounds like really mean.
That's true.
But that's not what happened with Derek anyway.
No.
Should we clip this?
Just kill me. No, I'm— and also like, okay, fine, Derek Hough, now I will never talk about you again. And now you're only hurting your own career.
Is that what you want?
Who's your weenie? It's giving I didn't prepare one.
No, what's the thing about Jackie?
She's not gonna prepare a weenie.
I don't know, weenie, it doesn't—
oh look, she's distancing herself from weenie.
I mean, I have this issue every week. Like, of course, like Phineas, Macklemore, Lucas Graham, they're my weenies.
When in doubt, Phineas. When in doubt. I love that. Fair. Okay, yeah, that's our show. Under 90 minutes today.
I hope everyone— I can't—
I hope that one commenter is happy. Have you seen, like, we have one hater. Everyone's always like, longer episode, Nilafi. Like, I think the more minutes, the better. I feel that we're getting rewarded. And literally starting on Monday, someone was like, is this episode really 90 minutes? And then every day this week being like, you guys are so disrespectful, you think we have nothing to do but sit and watch. And I was like, wait, I thought Nilafis were good.
I thought we like Nilafis. Nilafi's greater than Nasafi.
Someone tell that one commenter they can listen to today's episode.
It's only 66 minutes.
Thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast of the Monday Morning Show, where we deliver the fast 5 stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday. On YouTube, if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found. Set Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Pocket Radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places where you listen to podcasts. Find us at toasttvfoxstarview about how beautiful, stunning, and wickedly talented we are.
Love ya. Oh, and we are off Monday for—
Oh my God, we didn't even talk about that.
We're off Monday, you guys. Monday is the day of Yom Kippur. So even though you're sad that we're off, like, we're more sad because we're fasting And actually, I think we'll have a Patreon for you on Monday.
Oh cool.
I've got it, Koji.
Oh, okay. So we will see you guys on Tuesday.
But if you want an episode on Monday, if you're fasting and you need something to help you get through, or you're not fasting and you just have a regular workday and need something to get through, patreon.com/thetoes. We'll have a fresh episode for ya. Love ya.
Love you, bye.
Bye.
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- Queenie and Weenie of The Week (56:47)
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