Transcript of Kelly Clarkson Should Not Go To Brooklyn: Tuesday, October 13th, 2026

Good morning, girlies, it's The Toast. It's Jax and Claude and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly, it's The Toast. I sound amazing.

Welcome back to The Toast and happy Tuesday. That feels like a Monday because it was a 3-day weekend and we did forget to tell you about that on Friday. That's our bad. Shout out to Columbus and the indigenous for what you guys pulled off yesterday. We really appreciate it.

We do appreciate the day off. Much needed. Very productive.

Yeah. And I don't get involved in the politics of the day. I take the day whether it's coming from Columbus.

I celebrate all peoples.

1000%. I actually think we need 2 days. Call me crazy.

One for Columbus, one for the indigenous people, and maybe like a third for us.

And what about one for the swirlies while we're at it?

I agree. So thank you to everyone.

I can't lie though. While obviously I always appreciate a day off, I'm never gonna spit in the face of a day off. It happening on the day where Kelly Clarkson is going viral as the official Kelly Clarkson Watchdog Podcast. Like, that was hard.

I just feel like we took one day off and Kelly Clarkson got canceled. Like, we can't even take a day off because we are doing the work of keeping her America's sweetheart.

And of course that's our lead story because I need to talk about it in such a desperate way. But I just wanna say I'm glad she was getting a little too popular. If she went on tour, tickets were gonna get a little too expensive. So yeah, cancel Kelly, idiots. Cancel her.

Everyone was loving her. But you know who never did? Brooklyn.

And Kelly Clarkson was never meant to be in Brooklyn. Like, that's where she messed up.

Brooklyn will never love Kelly Clarkson. They'll never appreciate her.

They'll never understand her.

And that's okay. You can't go everywhere.

You're not for everyone.

You're not for everyone. So—

Even Kelly Clarkson.

Next time you're thinking of going to a unique play shop in Brooklyn, don't.

Just wonder if it's for you.

Yeah. Do you feel like you can go to Brooklyn?

Okay, it's a comp— obviously, because on the surface we're like, no, turn— I think that like they actually would like really understand me at Brooklyn.

They would understand you.

I think they would respect me. At first, like, you know, on the surface they'd be like, oh, this glamazon, this model, you know, she doesn't belong here. But once they got to know the real me, I'm really like an all-American gal. Yeah, I think they would love me.

I don't think I can go to Brooklyn.

Jackie, it's not even a question of whether or not— like, you should be banned from Brooklyn and Brooklyn should be banned from you.

It's true.

2 more opposite things don't exist.

So Kelly and I can stay having tea in New York City.

Kelly should stay sort of where she belongs, in her lane.

Yeah, no, no, no, it's true. We'll get to it. Anyways, I'm sorry, Kelly, that we weren't here for you yesterday. Like, your girls do need to take a day off. There's a lot of things that you need to do on a weekday.

It was such a developing story that I'm glad that we're sitting it down now with all the facts. They responded, she responded, and they responded again.

No, there's no like speculation. Well, maybe it was for sale. It was for sale for $15,000. They thought there was no way she could afford it.

And that's like our relatable queen, because like when a celebrity walks in somewhere, you know. But Kelly's so of this earth and so real. You know what, let's save it for the first time.

I feel like when someone gets canceled, like all of the people who've like been secretly hating that person come out and you really see. And it does feel like there's a little bit of that here, though there's nothing to hate about her, where like people are comfortable calling her names.

I didn't know that there was this cohort of people who secretly harbored hate.

Who have been waiting to tell Kelly Clarkson she's ugly.

Genuinely, like, what's to hate? I don't even— I couldn't— can't even relate to being such a miserable negative person.

I don't know. I don't know. But you know, everyone's always coming out like, oh, well, you know—

One time, did you ever see this clip of her on Watch What Happens Live? Like, girl, shut up. If you've been famous as long as Kelly's been famous, which is what? When did American Idol premiere? Give me a date.

2000, 2001.

You've been famous almost 30 years and like, this is your first real scuffle? Like, Let me tell you, she's a queen, okay? Yeah. That's all the proof I needed.

I didn't see the Watch What Happens Live clip, but I thought I saw that it exists.

Yeah, there is this like Watch What Happens Live—

Is it bad? Can you pull it up? Pull it up.

So there is this Watch What Happens Live clip that is resurfacing. Oh no, you know what's gonna resurface next? Her conversation about spanking her kids.

Whoa, my bad.

Okay, so basically she's on Watch What Happens Live after like a VMA of sorts, and she had tweeted something like kind of shady during the VMAs, and people assumed it was about Miley. So of course Andy, Pled the Fifth.

Would you still liken Miley Cyrus's singing to a pitchy stripper, or has she been able to—

I never said Miley Cyrus.

You— you—

so the tweet that comes up on screen is, just saw a couple performances from the VMAs last night. 2 words, hashtag pitchy strippers.

That's— that's not something—

You've been able to—

I never said Miley Cyrus.

You— you tweeted during the VMAs—

The fact that I tweeted pitchy stripper and people thought Miley Cyrus is not my problem. Okay.

I'm

just saying.

This was during the VMAs. This was during the VMAs.

Yeah, I didn't say Miley Cyrus, my man.

Katy Perry performed that night.

Lovely girl.

Um, Nicki Minaj performed that night.

Lovely girl.

Okay, so it was not necessarily Miley Cyrus.

I never said Miley Cyrus. Everybody else said Miley Cyrus when I did that.

Now it's important for those who can't see the video to know that Kelly has the side of her head shaved.

Oh, it was her scratch. It was her scratch.

She actually has the same haircut as Skrillex. Yes, she has a total half, and then the other is a side part to the other side. She looks just like Skrillex. So she was clearly at like a very unhappy place in her life, and it's like, okay, well, normalize not always saying the right thing. Like, she's obviously just giving mean girl bully there, and it's like, we've all been there when you're so unhappy with yourself that you shave your head. Like,

and like, you hate yourself, so you hate everyone else.

1,000%. But I just feel like that clip is making the rounds.

Okay, well, that definitely does That does, I didn't get to—

It gives people ammunition. I didn't get to watch it.

I only heard it 'cause I'm like, oh, that, I, I, that clip like doesn't bother me so much. Of course I love Miley, so I'm just gonna like hope it wasn't about Miley. But—

She pretty much confirms that it was.

Like normalize like being shady. Everyone wants everyone to be interesting and speak their mind. But then the minute like you say someone's a pitchy stripper, like you're the bad guy. No,

of course. And I love the gymnastics you are doing for Kelly. And what I, I'm gonna just come at it from a real POV is like, you know, there was an era of Kelly's career where like she really couldn't get arrested. She had like nobody would want to work with her. And I feel just based on that clip, like, that's a part of that era. And so she's just like an unhappy person. She looks crazy with her hair like that, so she's obviously just like in a bad place. And when you're in a bad place, you lash out. Like, I— we have literally all been there. Yes. Whether you're in a bad place physically, emotionally.

And I think that's important to know because she wouldn't speak like that today. Never. Generally speaking, we don't even get moments like that anymore. We don't get tweets like that. Everyone is so fake nice. I'm sick of it. And if you're—

if you think someone's a pitchy stripper, like, say it. Say it.

And I don't wanna like knock her for that because I think we need more shade.

Well, we'll talk about Kelly Clarkson versus the, uh, polyamorous bird in the first story. Before that, let me tell you guys that after Friday's episode, we recorded what people are saying is our funniest Patreon ever. Every time we're together in person, we like to play Headbands, which is like that game where you put a celebrity's name on your forehead and the other person tries to guess. We really went there with this episode. Um, it is being lauded as our best yet. People are saying monthly installment, monthly installment. That's just what people are saying. Say no more. Say no more.

Say less, bestie.

And actually I have started a list on my phone. Yeah. Of people I think would be good to do. So I'm really committing to the headbands available at patreon.com/thetoast. Patreon is our monthly subscription where you guys can pay $7.99 a month. The show is free. It's always gonna be free. But if you're always looking for more, we do like deep dives on certain pop culture topics. We do a little bit more personal. We do a bunch of vlogs. We do Q&A. We have installments where we do whole episodes of Dear Toasters. We do whole episodes of headbands. We play lots of games. It's Patreon. It's, uh, vlogs, it's podcasts. It's a lot of different stuff. So patreon.com/thetoast, check it out.

Yes.

Um, stories.

The stories, I mean, they're really good cuz it's been a 3-day weekend. We had a lovely weekend. Super productive. What did I do on

productive?

Well, productive for me yesterday because I went to HomeGoods and I've started the project of styling my shelves, which is like basically where you have to buy a bunch of nonsense. Mm-hmm. That you would never use or read. But I'm styling with purpose and I feel, I feel really fulfilled by it. I'm really excited.

That's amazing.

Yeah. It's hard. I mean, have you ever styled shelves before?

Of course I have. It's a nightmare.

You have?

ChatGPT, of course. And like always taking a picture and saying, ChatGPT, like, yeah, do this up. And then you go find like shit that ChatGPT generated. It never really looks like how ChatGPT looks. Yeah, but it's better than the shit I was gonna do.

It's just the concept is crazy, don't you think?

Because it's actually— you're throwing money away. Like, it's money on garbage. These are not like good quality items. They're not really that beautiful either.

They are not useful. You cannot use them.

Even if it's not a jar you could put cookies in.

Even if you have a jar, you cannot put things in it.

Yeah, no, it's so dumb.

Some of the books don't even have words.

That's why you have to go to HomeGoods. Anybody who like spends serious money, very like Amanda Francis, on those shelves, it's a complete waste. They don't weather, like they literally just sit there.

Yeah, I had an amazing experience at HomeGoods yesterday. We have to go together because there was Parginess everywhere.

I'm— look, one thing about me, I'm always down for HomeGoods.

Except for yesterday.

I was not available yesterday. I actually went to the doctor. Everything's fine, everything's fine. But you know, while I'm here, I went to the doctor. I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant.

So you go to the doctor.

I went to the doctor. No news is good news.

Yeah, that's exciting. And then what do we do on Saturday?

I'm like blinking. What was this weekend? We swam,

we had a little pool party,

we barbecued.

That's always nice.

Um, did we do nothing?

We had lunch together on Saturday.

Oh, I love lunch.

Yeah, we had a good time.

Oh, Coxsackie has hit my home. Huge L for the community, let me tell you. Not fun. Not fun.

HFM.

And Ben—

The artist formerly known as HFM.

Yeah, I don't like to say HFM. It's disgusting. We have Coxsackie. And let me tell you, Ben turns to me in bed, he's like, oh my God, I have Coxsackie. Coxsackie, for those who don't know, is a very common children's illness. Like if you send your kids to any sort of daycare or classes, it just goes around. And it's like there's nothing to do about it. You just gotta wait. But it manifests itself in a sore throat and a rash on their legs. And so Ben thinks that he has the rash and he's like, look at my arm. When I tell you he had one red bug bite, he was like, I have cock sacky.

He had a bug bite. I

have cock sacky.

But you know that like sometimes when adults get HFM, like from their kids, which does happen, it can be really hard. It's really hard on adults.

I know. So I feel that it's definitely in my future. Mm-hmm. So if I'm not here for the remainder of the week, that's what's going on. Yeah. But for now I'm fine.

Okay. Thank you.

And cock sacky doesn't pose like a particular threat to pregnant women. It's just

like, it's just a pain in the ass.

It's a pain in the ass.

Yeah. Just like being sick.

But I'm okay. I'm a survivor.

Stay strong, Turdy.

Thank you so much.

Um, so that's really it, just like a wholesome party weekend. Appreciate the 3 days.

Let's dive in.

Like, I'm into the stories.

I can no longer talk about— like, talk normally as if Kelly Clarkson isn't in crisis, you know?

Yeah, in crisis mode. I

wonder like what—

There's only 2 girls.

She's not backing down. I wonder what her take on this whole thing is. Like, does she regret getting involved? Is she—

Well, she's obviously somewhere inside of her, like a snarky individual who likes drama based on that clip. Like she's not all just apple pie. Of course.

And nobody is, but her front-facing image is—

And I think she feels very justified. Yeah. Like at, in the way that they treated her, that they needed to pay.

And I think she feels that their response is full of lies. So she feels even more incentivized to be critical.

That's always helpful when like your op is lying. 100%. And you're free to call them out.

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Thank you, Turnt Nation.

It's getting to that point where like I can't do the ads without like choking on my breath.

Take a sip.

I'm not thirsty, I can't breathe.

Yeah, but it might help you just Sorry, that's music from, um, our first story. Our first story comes with music.

It does? Oh.

Just the— someone put audio over it. Kelly Clarkson is at war with a Brooklyn play shop.

And it's a war that she started. Yes. Which was, I think, the most surprising thing on Sunday when I saw this tweet. Very sort of out of character for a woman her stature to be like coming for a local business.

Yes, yes. She doesn't really get in the muck, but she tweeted Just drove all the way to Brooklyn to check out this store I thought looked really rad and had a few things in mind to buy, and literally was looked at as if I couldn't afford it and was told he could find something comparable for me. Wow, dude, you're an idiot and just lost a huge sale. But y'all should go check out Art of Play in Brooklyn if you enjoy being treated like Julia Roberts' character in Pretty Woman. For sure, check it out. Thumbs down.

So she named the—

Name 'em.

Named 'em? And of course, people had a field day with this. Now, my initial thoughts were— and you guys know I hate when celebrities use their social media platforms for customer service issues. Usually it's with like Delta, um, like this billion-dollar company, not a local business. But honestly, I hate when they do it for anyone. Like, sorry, that's for regular people to do. And like, sorry that happened to you, but you're never gonna get our sympathy. Now, of course, it's different with Kelly Clarkson because she's Kelly Clarkson. So when I saw this, like, part of me did like You know, clench my butthole. I was like, girl, okay, like we don't do this.

Just like eye roll. And if they had never responded, the shop, I would've just walked away from this thing that Kelly Clarkson tweeted, just being like, that wasn't necessary. You know? Okay, you had a bad experience. Congratulations.

Like, welcome to the real world. It happens to all of us.

It happens to people all the time, whether you have the money or you look like you do or you don't. Like you just, sometimes people are disrespectful. Like, didn't have to go and tweet about it.

Now, before anyone responded, people pretty much assumed, if you know anything about this store, it's like owned by like very wealthy gay guys. Like people just assumed like maybe they didn't know who Kelly was. She is like sort of like, of course they didn't know who she was.

Like a regular—

Here we go. She looks like a regular— that's why we love her, is that she's not this glamazon. Even when she's on her show, she doesn't do crazy hair and makeup. She's just a regular woman, and that is why she has so much success. So I assume on a Sunday going to Brooklyn, she's not even wearing makeup. So she's just sort of looking regular.

Like a regular mom.

Exactly. And you know, these like snarky bitchy gays were definitely like,

you can't afford

this, fatty. Like, you know, she's not fat, but you know what I mean? Like, that's definitely like the attitude they have in Brooklyn for sure. And we would've left it at that. But then the store responded, like kind of adding context, which Kelly says is full of lies. Yeah. But when they responded, people were like, Kelly, are you okay?

So the store replied with the situation and this is what they said. They said, yesterday Kelly Clarkson visited us in Brooklyn and inquired about buying Molly, a one-of-a-kind singing and dancing bird automaton who plays an important role in the magic shows we host here. Molly is permanently attached to the wall and isn't for sale. However, the negative experience Kelly described on Twitter would resonate with anyone who has ever felt judged in a shop. At Art of Play, whether someone comes in to make a purchase or simply look around for a while, they are equally welcome. We greet everyone who walks in the door with the invitation to pick things up and play, and they do. Many stay for hours enjoying our puzzles, games, and toys.

I'm bored.

Imagine our surprise when our small local business was suddenly attacked by 8 million people who have never visited our store. It's— everyone wants to be a victim, you know?

Oh my God, it's so true. Like, how many things— we're local owned— how many things can we get in here? Yeah, right.

It's been a surreal experience to be the focus of such widespread outrage after just one mention by a celebrity. Thanks to all our friends for their support, and welcome to all the curious folks who have discovered us amidst the drama. We're going to keep our heads down, and hopefully we can clear things up with Kelly someday. As a talented popular singer once said, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

So this was like not gonna work for Kelly because she feels very strongly that she went in there to buy something with a price tag on it, and she was denied, whereas the store claims that what she was trying to buy is actually not for sale.

Yeah, and they showed a video of Molly, and so—

It's like their mascot, basically. Like, it's this like thing everybody knows.

Can I just try to like audibly describe what Molly is?

She's a— okay, it's, you know that fish that used to sing? Like you would—

Gimme that Filet-O-Fish.

Gimme that fish, and like it's the bass that would be like on the wall?

Yeah.

That's what it is, but it's like art, so it's $15,000. The store is like known for it, you could like, It's like a puppet, whatever. Mm-hmm. And so they wanted to share a video of Molly the Bird, and in doing so, eagle-eyed viewers noticed that actually there

is a

price tag. There's a price tag. It says Molly the Bird by the artist, whatever, $15,000.

Yeah. And guess what? Everything has a price.

Yes. So Kelly was like, oh, okay. So we're like lying now.

So she goes, cool, cool. Sure. She sounds like that.

It's giving Skrillex. It's giving cool, cool.

Sure, sure. It wasn't for sale. That's the narrative Art of Play is gonna go with. Thumbs up. So the whole conversation we had when I asked you if it was for sale whilst pointing to the price tag hanging on the wall with the title Singing Bird didn't happen, as you elevator-eyed me saying in a condescending tone, yes, it's for sale, but it costs $15,000. So if you'd like me to find something comparable for you, I can. That all never happened, and now it's for sale. Okay, cool. So you're not only rude, you're also a liar. Got it. She definitely called them out on their lie, but it's like not rude that they wanted to find her a more inexpensive version.

Because it's absurd that anyone, no matter what they do for a living, would ever pay $15,000 for a bird. A fake bird. Well, maybe they had the opportunity for it to release. Yeah. So I just—

she said, and by the way, I obviously support small businesses cuz I was literally at a small business trying to purchase things. I love small businesses and know they're important. I always support them. If you find yourself in a position where you like are fighting for your life with

a small business,

trying to let everyone know you support small businesses, like it's gone too far. Although I do wanna

say

you support small—

Kelly ate with that because she's being accused of not supporting a small business when she literally traveled to Brooklyn to go support one. So she's like, you guys say I don't support, I was trying to support in quite a large way, $15,000.

But you don't get a free pass to treat people less than in your store just because you are a small business. True

facts.

Like, just cuz you're a small business, you can't hide behind the fact that your business is small. It's not that hard to be kind. I never blast—

it is though. Like, it really is. I could speak from experience.

I never blast people, but you, my friend, were an exception. Your store is really cool. Unfortunately, you aren't. I just wanna say, like, for this woman who has so much money and followers and doesn't really like like opine on social media, you know? It's just like the graphics that are— yeah, I mean, I do think for her to go out of her way to have had such an awful experience— I think they treated her like shit—

and for her first statement to be received so poorly, and then the people responded, and people like were loving the first response from the toy store. The fact that Kelly didn't back down or like grovel or be like, love you, makes me think like she is justified based on the circumstances inside the store.

Release the CCTV footage.

Yeah, because then the store responded and it was very like conclusiony, conclusionary, and just being like, we love Kelly, like, whenever, I hope you can come back and make it work. Um, she did call them out on their lie and they sort of exposed themselves when they said it wasn't for sale and they posted it with like an actual price tag. I stand with Kelly. I was gonna stand with Kelly no matter what. I could argue both sides. She really shouldn't have gotten involved because now she's the subject of like online hate.

Ridicule. And now everyone— And

she's really never been. Been

like waiting to call her ugly and homely.

And resurface the Watch What Happens Live clip.

They're all coming out of the woodwork. I didn't know that they existed. I want to say, if the store never responded and it was just Kelly's tweet like sitting out there in the cold, I wouldn't have looked favorably on it. Me neither. That's not like my favorite thing to do.

It's an abuse of like your power dynamic, like to come— okay, maybe they were assholes, but like You get to go home to your mansion.

Really, go home, collect yourself. Like, you had a negative experience. It's frustrating. Sometimes, like, the worst— like, I just am feeling hateful. I wanna just rage tweet as well, but I don't.

Of course.

And I move on.

Of course.

You never know what Art of Play is going through. You don't know what Molly the Automaton is going through.

The content about Molly— like, Molly's obviously now, like, a fixture on the internet, and people just— like, the jokes being made about this have actually brought me so much joy and laughter. Like, I'm sorry that this is happening to Kelly because I do think overall her Q score will be affected. And like just sort of this impenetrable image that she had of like being America's sweetheart, really no scuffs on her image or her reputation. Now she's like, you know, they're making fun of her on Twitter like they do the rest of them. Overall, it wasn't like an amazing choice, but the content I've received from it like has really made it all the worthwhile.

I'm glad. I'm glad. And like, not everyone can go to Brooklyn, you guys.

That definitely is one of the takeaways here. You shouldn't complain on social media about customer service if you have more than 100,000 followers. And 2, like, Brooklyn is not for everyone.

And if, if you have a lot of following and you do go to Brooklyn and it doesn't go well for you, you've got to keep your mouth shut about it.

And you know how there are like certain travel restrictions? Like, not everyone could just go to Cuba, right? Like, I don't know what the rules are, but like, if you're a refugee or like, it's like a political something, I don't know. We need rules like that for Brooklyn. Like, it is like a kind of a hotbed of drama.

Yeah, like there are some countries where if you like have a passport of one country, can't go to another country.

If you have a stamp on it from this country. Yeah, I don't know. I just don't think we should be going so freely into Brooklyn. Like, it really is a crazy place full of drama.

And I don't think— I think the way that they acted, I think they definitely treated her like dirt. 100%.

1,000%.

I think they made her feel less than zero. They had no clue who she was. They don't care to know who she was. And even if they knew she was Kelly Clarkson, like, they probably still wouldn't care.

And that thing has been on the wall for 30 years. Not one person has ever seriously inquired about buying it because it's moronic. So the idea that somebody who looks like Kelly Clarkson would come in for the first time ever, seriously consider buying it— they didn't think she was legit.

No, they didn't. And I'm sure they made her feel terrible.

Although I do want to say, in this day and age, you can't just trust everyone who comes into your store saying they want to buy stuff. I'm always seeing things on TikTok of like people filling their bag with shit and running out.

I saw this video. It was like a girl and she was like, I'm gonna go to this house 2 weeks apart from each other. First time, like dressed like a, yeah, what did she say? Like a 2, I don't know, like an uggo. And then the next time, 2 weeks later, like in a nice dress, like looking nice and like, see the way the realtor treats me and how it's different. And it was just like, she came in looking like a slob. Like it's, it's not, we're judging you cuz you're ugly. We're here judging you cuz you're here in your pajamas.

Yeah. I don't like shit like that.

And you're looking at that $3 million house. And then a girl comes in who looks nice, who looks employed. Yes, you can judge a book by its cover just a tiny bit.

It's literally Dhar Mann. Do you know Dhar Mann? No. You don't know Dhar Mann? You've definitely seen his videos. Actually, every time they do like Forbes top creators, he's like always in the top. He produces this like PSA style content about like why you should be kind to people. Like, have you ever seen like there's a mean sales associate and this girl walks in, she's secretly famous and they don't give her the time of day. Or there's like a roommate who's eating oranges and like you're always supposed to learn. It's, I think it's like for kids, but it always goes viral cuz it's moronic and it's like, I was like, this is literally a Dhar Mann skit, like 100%.

Yeah, no, and it's like she comes in before the open house in her like slob-like attire, and the realtor's like stressing. She doesn't offer her a water or anything because she's like, can I help?

Who's paying for this water? Water's not free.

Then when she comes in like looking fancy and professional, she says, can I get you a water? Can I show you this? Can I show you that? But like, I, I don't think it has to do with— she was saying when I'm ugly versus when I'm pretty. Like, she doesn't care what you look like. It's about like, are you—

do you look like you're seriously gonna buy this house?

What you say about yourself.

100%. I hate shit like that. And I do feel that like we're supposed to like not judge people, but like, again, this realtor who's like baking cookies and buying water bottles, you can't just be giving like your free waters and cookies to everyone who walks in the door.

No.

No. It reminds me of, um, a conversation that's being had right now on TikTok about bringing an iced coffee to a job interview. Have you seen this? Yeah. People are like freaking about this cuz like a lot of like older millennials are like, of course you cannot bring an iced coffee. And some people are like, be yourself. It's like covering up your tattoos on your face. And it's like, Well, like, maybe presenting your best foot forward, like, is okay. Maybe that's okay.

I think it's okay.

Maybe that's okay. And maybe a person having a reaction to you, 2 separate reactions based on, you know, you having an iced coffee or not— people are people. And you know what, it does say something.

And it's like, if you come with an iced coffee, I'm not writing you off immediately, but it's definitely—

Did you bring me one?

It's definitely like a small knock, and it's like the first impression isn't the best impression, and now you, you have to work back from there.

Yes, but I don't write you off immediately. But like, do you suck and are you stupid? Well, then the iced coffee was just—

And you didn't make a great first impression. Good luck to you trying to recover from that.

I said good day, sir.

No, no, you can recover from that with a stellar interview, but you just set yourself back a little bit.

Yeah, agreed.

And like, what time is the interview? Why don't you have your coffee earlier?

No, and it's like you're like slushing around too, like, you know.

I would also say that for some reason a hot coffee is more acceptable.

1,000%.

Because a hot coffee speaks to maturity.

And it speaks to like a patience, right? You have to be a very patient person to drink a hot coffee. You can't forget about the coffee. You can't drink it too fast. It's too fast.

No, and it's like you really like coffee. If you're drinking an iced coffee and it's half white, like watered down, drinking a milkshake.

Yeah, no, I completely agree.

Came to my interview with a milkshake like a 12-year-old.

No one is talking about the hot coffee. They're only talking about the iced coffee, and

there's a reason.

Yeah,

if I came with this—

That's a very sophisticated cup.

I think so too. It says like she thinks ahead,

she cares about the environment. Yeah, of course I do. Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.

Um, so yeah, it definitely would be a demerit.

Yeah.

Yeah. Are you ready for our next story? Are you ready to move on?

Like, hopefully— I am.

Hopefully there'll be more.

It will come up again, like, throughout the episode, just because it's, like, so at the forefront of my mind. But I'm, I'm good to move forward. And just in case anyone was wondering, like, where we stand, like, we stand firmly on Team Kelly.

Of course, of course.

She's not making it easy, but we do.

Yeah, we do.

I— Sometimes you just feel so strongly about something so random, you, like, can't let it go.

I don't feel so strongly.

I'm saying Kelly does.

Oh, yes. No.

And, like, people think you're crazy, but it's like like, when something bothers you, like, you really can't help, like, what gets underneath your skin.

No. And that's why I believe the offense was so egregious that she was like, you have to pay, even if it means me losing—

Destroying my reputation.

Yeah. Our next story, speaking of reputations destroyed, Selma Blair was arrested and hospitalized after a plane incident. She's been accused of injuring 2 flight attendants as the FBI is investigating.

I saw this morning her, uh, footage of her in court.

So Selma Blair was arrested after she allegedly punched a flight attendant and bit another flight crew member during a Delta Airlines flight to New York City.

I saw that she also, um, took her— some of her anger out on a police officer too, which is I think why the sentence is so heavy. Not that, you know, people aren't equal, but I think it's a higher thing when you do it to a cop. It is. 7 years. Look at— she's facing up to 7 years. Correct.

TMZ reports that she was flying from JFK on Sunday, leading to an altercation with the crew on board. The flight attendants reported sustained injuries during the altercation, and one was taken to the hospital. The outlet also reported that she was arrested and taken to a hospital for evaluation on Sunday. The FBI is currently investigating the situation.

Yeah, that's the thing, like, you can't get away with a lot on a plane. Like, obviously this is bad if it happens on the ground, but something about it being on a plane, like, makes it— like, the sentence— the stakes are so high. And I feel like you can actually go to jail for the rest of your life if you do something on a plane that if you did on the ground, like, maybe you would get a couple years.

If you, like, look at the headline and you take out Selma Blair, like, it kind of sounds like an act of terrorism.

Right, right. On a plane. Right.

On a plane.

Right, maybe she's being charged with domestic terrorism as well.

And it's federal because like you're between states,

right? It's like the airspace.

And like literally over the country,

right? Right. No, this is not good. And it's not the first incident she's had on a plane. People are now citing an early 2000s incident where she like also like forgot to take her meds. I don't know like what meds they're talking about, but that's what her lawyer said in court today.

Yeah, they said that she experienced a medical emergency that led to the alleged conduct. Upon landing, she received immediate medical attention and is currently in stable condition. Doesn't she have MS?

Yeah, okay, so I found that also confusing because, um, as far as I know about MS is that you're confined to like either a wheelchair or a walker and you're not like really able to kick people.

You're weakened.

Yeah, like that's the whole thing is that your muscles are sort of deteriorating. Um, I don't know how you go and kick a cop in a significant way.

And send someone to the hospital.

Right, and also then I saw in court today that the person who's in the hospital, like, she has been like issued a restraining order to stay away. They think she's maybe gonna come for the person in the hospital. Yeah.

So it's not like an isolated incident.

This is a big thing. Like, I do feel that sadly some of Blair's career is effectively over. Um, Vivienne Kensington like literally would never— she might, she might,

she might. Um, yeah, just like not everyone can go to Brooklyn, like not everyone can get on an airplane.

That is very true, you know, and I see that all the time in those like viral videos. It's like not Not only can some people not go on an airplane, some people should not go on an airplane. If you cannot act—

Behave in the skies.

Right. Like, have you ever seen the video of like, there's a couple of them where it's like the person's being escorted off the plane and they won't get off, they won't get off. So the whole plane has to deplane just because this person won't get off. Like, I'm sorry, if that's you, you're the biggest asshole on the planet.

Yeah.

Not everyone can fly and not everyone should fly. And they need to be a little bit more strict with that no-fly list.

They do. They do.

'Cause I could put a couple of people on there.

Yeah, you see like crazy videos. I'm sorry, if you're like ever in a situation where you are being like dragged off the airplane,

you should never be able to fly again.

There should be a ban.

Or if you're like ever physically assaulting like a gate agent, have you ever seen that?

Oh yeah, I have seen that.

Like, and I don't think that shit gets you on the no-fly list. I think they pretty much save that for like terrorists. But I think that people who act like that, when they need to be much— the entry for the no-fly list, people need to be more afraid of getting on the no-fly list because obviously like Like, you don't think about that.

At least you're still on— like, it's terrible and you shouldn't ever do that, ever. I would never. And like—

But you're not in the confined—

But there's something about just—

There's something very sinister. Yeah, I know. The vessel.

So I, I honestly, like, I don't understand this story. I don't understand what happened to her. Um, I'm gonna need more information. Obviously it's terrible, but like, I— there's no— this doesn't make sense.

Makes no sense.

This makes no sense.

Psychotic break is what, you know.

But I don't understand the physicality of it, given like—

Given the diagnosis. Yeah. Correct. I, I can't help you. I'm sorry.

Um, so let's see what happens. Are you ready for our next story? Mm-hmm. Khloe Kardashian threw shade at the hot teacher she flirted with online in the new episode of Kardashians. Did you watch?

I did. I fell asleep in the middle and it has nothing to do with the show. Or just the title. I'm pregnant and tired. Um, but I watched most of it.

I watched, uh, it was very enjoyable. I didn't love the AI thing in the beginning.

I didn't, I didn't think it was funny. Like,

I didn't think it was funny either.

They have such a hard time like getting in on the joke. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah. And I think they thought this was revolutionary. Oh.

And I think they thought it was like, so, you know, they're laughing with us. Like, it's like, you guys don't even get it. You guys don't even get it.

Anyways, um, one storyline, I think it was literally like a, a plot, uh, 8 storyline, which I thoroughly enjoyed, was Chloe addressing the hot teacher comment she made last year. So when the hot viral teacher, Jacob Myers Norris, he is a teacher who is handsome, who posts a lot of content in the classroom because he's handsome and it's unacceptable.

Which, you know, I don't like. Yeah. He posts way too much in the classroom and that's what Chloe should be coming at him for.

He had like posted something literally a few months ago being like, you know, I just wish a beautiful woman would ask me how my day is. And Khloe Kardashian comment,

how was your day?

And here's what happened. She said, so there was this teacher, really cute young man that I saw, and on his Instagram he highlighted some of his great characteristics. And then in the caption, something like, I can't wait for a woman to ask me how my day was. I thought it was so wholesome.

That's such a good vibe. I wanna say like, so, um, like fishing for compliments. Like, first of all, if you're like a handsome guy, like, it's really not hard. Even ugly guys, like, it's not hard for a guy to get a girl. Yeah, like, it's not hard at all. So if you don't have one, I just want to say it's by choice.

I agree. He's definitely so picky and he's a nightmare.

Yeah, totally. You're like a mama's boy.

She said, I thought it was wholesome. I just wrote in the caption, how was your day? It was that innocent. And I just want to say, like, when I saw her write that, I thought she was nominating herself to be the woman in his life. Obviously. But no, she was just like was like, he said he wants a woman to ask him how his— a beautiful woman to ask him how his day was. So she asked him how his day was that day. Like, it's not anything more than that. Which I didn't see it like that at the time. Of course not. She goes, it was that innocent. Do I think I'm gonna go and marry this young man? Absolutely not. She said it took off like wildfire. Then she accused him of flooding her inbox with DMs. She said, I have like 15 DMs from him that have gone unresponsive. She read off some of the messages. Oh, if anything, I just want to say thank you for everything. I know it was just a comment, Love to hear how your day was. Just shooting my shot once again. I would love to meet you and talk about how your day was.

She goes, calm down, Jacob. Just, just be cool. And his name, Jacob. Jacob, please get a J.

Okay, that's really mean.

Agreed.

Um, although I just wanna say, the more I hear about this teacher, like, I, I feel that there's something deeply— He dodged a bullet. Something deeply sinister lies with him.

He posted a video, um, Um, the clip was captioned, when they try to roast and embarrass me on The Kardashians, but I get roasted by high schoolers every single day. Then he said, hey, at least I can say I made it onto The Kardashians. 15 was an exaggeration, by the way.

That's really funny. Um, I do think the Jacob thing was like a little unnecessary, although I know the perfect girl for him— Yancy. I don't know why Khloe like came for him so hard. Like, it's kind of like randomly mean. And I feel like of all the girls, Khloe's like the least mean. She's really sweet. So like—

No, she's like personally offended and perturbed by this guy.

Maybe she sees in him— like, I'm telling you, there's like a darkness that lies within.

Like a thirstiness. I agree.

Yeah. And like, obviously you're not dating Khloe Kardashian, but also that was like a crazy comment. Her kind of minimizing the comment is also wrong because we know what you meant, and you know what you meant too.

No, I do think like she just wanted to make his day. And I also think the way that Khloé behaves on social media is very much as a millennial mama. Like, she follows them Hoffers, she leaves emojis.

Does she follow them Hoffers?

Yes! And so like, she just saw Jacob like everyone else, and a bunch of women probably wrote, how was your day? Just to boost this guy's ego that certainly does not need boosting. And so she forgot that she's Khloé Kardashian and you can't just engage with a single man and we're not gonna pay attention.

You know who Khloé should date? This is gonna be like one of my best calls ever. I feel like you're not gonna see it though, 'cause like you don't know the lore. She needs to date Shemar Moore. You know who that is? I do. He's from Criminal Minds. He's probably like the hottest guy on the planet.

He's not married?

Is he married? Can somebody look it up? I don't think he's married, but he also like has this— not married— insane following of like older women, like kind of cheugy women who leave comments like, oh, Shemar. They love him and he loves them, and he's always like doing like little titty pics for them. Like, he's getting—

Maybe he is in a relationship, but he would never say because that would—

It would really affect his career. Um, but honestly, like, him and Khloé, because they're both like corny ass, like, I crave of a love as deep as the ocean. Like corny, like quote card.

She has pulled back with that stuff.

It's not good for her brand.

And also I don't think she does crave a love, period, let alone as deep as the ocean anymore. Like she had like—

When they did the flashbacks of her finding out that Tristan was having a baby with another woman while Khloe was secretly getting her surrogate pregnant, um, I like had forgotten about that.

Traumatizing.

She should never get into another relationship, only because I actually don't know if there's a person on earth who has a worse picker. And that's what she said. It's in the trailer for the season, being like, she doesn't trust herself, 'cause she trusted Lamar to do the documentary and she feels really betrayed by him. So at least she knows her pickers.

I don't even blame her for that because it's like all of us are being like, forgive Lamar.

And everyone's like, kind of mad. Like, get back together.

Yeah, you and Kylie are here so mean to him.

It's so true. so much pressure on her to like be nice to him.

Be nice to him, so she did something nice.

When he like literally ruined her fucking life.

And he still sucked.

And like he almost died, so we're all like, oh, Lammy, Lammy. But like, no, no, he's like literally the worst.

Yeah.

But he's Lammy.

No, and he's my birthday buddy. I don't wanna talk about it.

Oh, that's a bad one. A really bad one.

Um, yeah, no, she said on the show like she hasn't had sex in 4 years. Chris Appleton like—

I saw that part.

I guess.

Yeah.

But she was like, after a certain point you just don't even think about it anymore. It's not like every day of 4 years she's like—

It's like another day without sex.

Looking for sex. Like, I think she's just like so asexual at this point. Relationships are not on her radar. Like, she's focused on this season, sort of what Kim was saying about the 5 years before Louis, barring Pete Davidson, where it's just like focused on work, focused on kids. Like, it's just not even— she's not craving a love as deep as the ocean. Honestly, that would be a nightmare right now.

It was nice to hear Kim talk about slowing down. I couldn't help but feel that she was like suspiciously timing her slow down so she doesn't have to take the bar again because like I don't think she would pass. Um, the show, like they're clearly doing a lot of like Kourtney and co.

I'm enjoying. Eh. Oh no, sorry, not Landon. I mean like Kourtney and Simon.

No, I meant like her step— her like blended family.

No, I'm not enjoying that driving house even though I've been there so I should be more sympathetic. Um, like her in the car just trying to explain herself. The Jennifer Lawrence. The Jennifer Lawrence, the stuff with her family, like, I'm really in my Kourtney era.

I am too, and I think that now when I look back on like the last couple of seasons, I see her more. And knowing how things like panned out for Kim and how things panned out for her, like, she was kind of onto Kim a little bit, and like reading Kim kind of like a book about how she just has her priorities so fucked up, and it's like she's just insatiable with what she wants. And it's like all in service of what? You didn't even pass the bar, right? And it's like your Dolce collection came and went and nobody gave a fuck.

Yeah, so you like hurt your relationship with your sister.

You physically assaulted her. Yeah. For what?

Also, when she was talking about that scene last season where she was clowning on Khloé and Kim for the way they dress.

And they said that they cut out a whole part. But it's like, girl, you're an executive producer, but like, I know you're so lazy and you don't watch the episodes and you just give no notes, but like, that would have been an important note for you to have given.

But I also felt like when she said it— I don't know what I said on the shows, maybe I was a coward, maybe I didn't even mention it— but I didn't think it was a crazy thing. Oh, I did. A crazy opinion to hold.

I thought it was so randomly mean. I remember recapping it being like, literally nobody asked, and it's It's like, she also like was kind of dressed up. She was in full glam, like she just wasn't wearing heels and like leggings. But I, I remember thinking like, that's so randomly mean. But it's not random. She came for you.

No, and like she came from a fitting, she's like hating herself, and then like Kim makes a comment to her about how she's, you know, going gray and just, you know, homely, whatever. And so then she gives it right back to her.

As a good sister should.

I'm sorry, like wearing a corset and high heels to family dinner like

is insane. And by the way, So no one looked crazier than Khloe, like in that bodycon dress.

I like the dress.

Of course, not at your mom's house. Like insane.

Because I like the dress, I'm like blinded to the inappropriateness.

Of course.

But the corset was crazier.

To the impropriety.

The corset was crazier.

They were both really crazy outfits. But yeah, context is key.

Yeah. I think we did have this conversation. 'Cause I remember also another thought that I had was there was a period where like Kim was wearing basketball shorts and tank tops like to events.

Right.

And it's like, no, wear basketball shorts and tank tops to dinner with your family.

To dinner at your mom's.

Yeah. And a corset. 100%.

I feel that another thing I found surprising about the season, or just the first episode, was that Kourtney like really cared. Like she was getting like a lot of shit. Like people were, especially for the last few years, people have really sided with Kim over Kourtney. And like, I just, I don't know why I thought she wouldn't care or even like know.

Yeah, I'm surprised she knew, but I'm not surprised that she cared. 'Cause nobody wants, no matter how thick of skin you have, to hear like you're negative and you're nasty and everybody hates you. Like it sucks. Yeah. But just know—

But she has a happy home life and I think that really carries her through.

Yes, and that's not the case. We see you.

Yeah, no, and the tides are turning on the Kourtney, like, stans. Don't worry.

Are you ready for our next story?

If it's our next story that's brought to you by Old Navy.

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Thank you, First Order.

You're welcome.

Our 4th story, Tobey Maguire has officiated the wedding of his ex-wife Jennifer Meyer to billionaire heir, Jeffrey Ogunlesi weeks after filing their divorce.

They took so long to get divorced, and I feel like when we talk about like celebrity marriages, we never talk about Tobey Maguire and Jennifer Meyer.

We never talk about Tobey Maguire, period. It's true. This might be the first time his name has come up.

And it's not for lack of— like, we know Tobey. Like,

I saw Molly's Game.

I saw Spider-Man that he was in. I saw— what else was he in?

Well, he wasn't in Molly's Game.

No, it's about him.

Yeah, just the

And like the true story of that is actually like deeply upsetting. He's like a real prick. I just saw, he's obviously back in the news now. He's a prick in the movie and like he literally destroyed that girl Molly and her whole business.

Michael Cera plays the character of Tobey Maguire.

So he was married to celebrity jeweler Jennifer Meyer. You probably know her from like all the Erin Foster, Gwyneth Paltrow, that like, you know, Malibu lady gang. They were married for a while and they've been divorced for a while too, but I guess not legally. But she recently got engaged and pregnant with her fiancé And so I guess it was time to sign the paperwork.

Yeah, so they split 10 years ago and they filed 6 years ago and they divorced a few weeks ago.

I don't know why I just assumed they had a bad relationship just because he seems like such an asshole.

Well, you don't have a 6-year divorce and it's all copacetic, but it is copacetic because he officiated the wedding, which, if you're asking me how I feel about this sort of celebrity officiant and ex-husband, also still I

think this is fucking crazy. Your ex-husband— first of all, like, your ex-husband should be nowhere near your wedding. First of all, you shouldn't even be invited. I don't even care how good of a relationship you have. Like, yuck. And like, then he's in all your pictures.

No, it's strange.

This is so Hollywood, like, where people just don't understand. Like, I just can't relate to this on any cellular level.

I don't understand why the new billionaire would go for it.

The new billionaire seems to be really into Jennifer Meyer, so like, I just feel like she's in charge. and whatever she wants goes. And that's amazing to have with a billionaire, you know?

Yeah, it doesn't happen often. Usually when you're with billionaires, it's in charge what they want, what they say.

Yeah.

It's their money.

Yeah.

But this billionaire is an agreeable billionaire.

He's sort of like a submissive billionaire, which you don't find a lot.

He is the son of a billionaire.

Oh, so maybe he's like used to being submissive.

He's just a nepo baby, actually. He probably—

He has no say.

He has no say.

She's probably paying all the bills.

Yeah, maybe. I don't know if his father gives him— I don't know what his relationship is, but it's not his say. Even if he gets money, it's not the same sort of power that you can feel.

No, of course not. Of course not. So I love this second era, second wind, as Kelly Clarkson once said, for Jennifer Meyer. And I follow her on Instagram and she just has a nice life, you know? She's like very wealthy and again now has a billionaire at her disposal.

That's always—

perhaps, perhaps.

What if he's cut off? What if he's estranged?

She would never.

Well, we know

she's a queen for that. Like, just— she would never.

They got married at the Four Seasons Resort Lanai in Hawaii. They were joined by A-list guests like Rachel Zoe, Courteney Cox, Leo and his girlfriend.

Leo, because Leo and Toby are such— see, that's what I'm saying. Like, why is your ex-husband's best friend at your wedding?

Even though I'm sure he was talking so much shit during the divorce, you know?

1,000%. Like gassing Toby up, being like, yeah, you're too good for her. Yeah, right.

She'll never be with a billionaire's son.

You really need to— Jennifer Meyer really needs to get away from him. Like, and then also, they have kids together. It's nice.

Jeff and Lauren Bezos were also there.

You're kidding. Yeah. You think for him or for her?

Probably for her. She's a friend. Not for Not for the name.

Maybe he's like a friend of his dad.

Perhaps, but he's a billionaire lawyer and investment banker. Like, no, no, for sure it's for her. It's definitely Lauren is friends with her because they're both friend girls.

Yeah, they both run in fabulous circles of people.

Yeah, and they're both like girls' girls who like just cultivate a lot of female friendships.

Yeah, yeah. Dream guest at my wedding, Lauren Bezos.

Yeah, she definitely participates.

1,000%.

She's getting in there for the hora.

100%. She's helping lift the chair.

Is Jennifer Meyer a Jew?

She is, I think.

I wonder if they did the hora.

Was Toby wearing a yarmulke? No. So not in the picture that I saw.

And neither was the nepo baby.

Okay. And I don't think actually I saw a chuppah. Maybe she's not Jewish. Maybe I'm actually making that up.

It looks to be chuppah adjacent, but sometimes—

Hello, weddings!

Everyone gets married under a beautiful arch.

And like, sometimes it's just not religious. You know, Amanda Frances's husband famously built her a chuppah with a cross.

Because they're interfaith?

Yeah, did you not hear me tell you that last week? She like made this whole video about her husband who's like a contractor and makes no money and is poor, remember? Um, he built her a chuppah, as she was saying, a chuppah with a cross.

Because one's a Jew.

I think she had like a dream of getting married under a chuppah, but like—

Is there a Jew?

Oh, I think him. He— her husband's Jewish.

Why did she get married in Okay, he's Jewish. She wanted to get married in a chapel, so he made a chapel chuppah. That's beautiful. Jennifer Meyer is a Jew.

I knew she would be.

I do believe they got married. That is a chuppah. That is a chuppah. That is for—

It might even be a tall one. The tallest. That's a chuppah. Okay, well, how beautiful.

That's really, really nice. Are you ready for our 5th and final story?

I just know the story she could tell about that crazy-ass Tobey Maguire. Like, seriously, I wish her the best.

He probably like sort of insisted that he officiate, and that's the only way they could finalize the divorce. Just

so everybody thinks like, look, I'm a good guy. I'm officiating my ex-wife's wedding.

Everybody loves Toby. Totally. How bad could he be?

How great is that Toby guy? Said nobody ever.

Our 5th and final story, beautiful news. Olivia Culpo and Christian McCaffrey have welcomed their 2nd baby, which is a boy. They never shared what gender they were having. Roman Augustus McCaffrey was born on September 29th.

You guys know how much like Olivia Culpo and her pregnancies mean to me. Mm-hmm. Um, and this was really beautiful to see

her giving birth. Like, what does that mean to you?

Means it's my turn next.

Yeah.

I love her. I love the name Roman. I loved Colette for her daughter, so I was curious. She's a tastemaker, so I was curious what, what she was gonna choose. I think there's a lot of pressure. I think she's also very religious, so like there are lots of different elements when it comes to choosing a name, and it's just very beautiful. I can't believe she gave birth like in season. I feel like that's so hard, like to do it like a lot without your husband.

That's so true.

Um, that's where it's like being a WAG is amazing, but like I could never be alone as much is a WAG needs to be alone. Football less, like there's 3 games. Those baseball wives, they work too hard, like seriously doing everything by themselves. Um, this is very beautiful, like this means a lot to me.

Yeah, mazel tov.

Mazel tov. To

the Coble McCaffreys.

To the Coble McCaffreys.

Yeah, I like the name Roman Augustus.

Yeah.

I think it will be a new, like—

Roman and Colette, they work well together too.

Seriously gorgeous. Seriously gorgeous. I have her, um, piccolette. You know that little, like, those plates that I use with the footballs on them?

Oh yeah.

And they're really sticky and good. Yeah, they're piccolette.

Um, another thing that happened this weekend that, like, I don't really want to talk about is Shangela's. I just want to say, because I feel like people are like, why are you guys talking about it? Because, like, I actually don't care. Like, I don't watch SNL, I don't watch Shangela's. Like, this is not my plate, you know?

Yeah, I feel—

I don't feel strongly either way.

I feel good in the fact that I don't have a horse in this race. I feel strongly.

I don't really like police comedy.

I've seen people on both sides and their hot takes, and each one— each side— Nobody— No, each side, I'm like, yeah, that's a good point. And then the other side, I'm like, yeah, that's a good point. And I just think it's a conversation.

Nobody's moving me. Like, I just— I can't really express how little I care about Shane Gillis. He's not like a— I've actually seen him live once because like I got free tickets, but beyond that, like—

No, but even like if anyone said what— like I said what he said, and I just feel like he's— I don't even I don't wanna piss anyone off.

Yeah, 'cause I don't care.

I'm just saying that is not my fucking problem.

It's true, this is not my plate. I don't care. I literally don't care about anyone involved. I don't know why SNL has him. Do you know what I mean? He seems so incongruous with the SNL of today.

I think he has a huge comedy audience and that is really what they want.

Of course, but they are sort of more buttoned up when it comes to comedy and he's sort of the face of that renegade comic movement who says the R word.

Yeah, but those are the comedy fans are.

No, of course, but I feel like SNL has really, um, isolated those viewers because they went with like a more—

like, it's why I think every once in a while they throw in Shane Gillis.

And it's like, it's bad for them and it's bad for Shane.

Like, seriously, really a thorn in their side. Like, nothing he ever— it's always just like he's so controversial for them. And then like everyone on the cast who probably are the type of people who would be like

Shane Gillis haters,

we don't like that. What can they even say? It just puts everyone in like a sort of a weird situation. But you know what?

I don't care. I don't care. I literally don't care. So—

And he doesn't care is the thing. People are offended by what he said. I don't think anything that they're saying changes like his stance whatsoever. And it's not like he's gonna apologize or anything. And I think people are like— actually, I don't even want to say what people are like.

Yeah, because this is seriously not my problem. I'm not getting involved for this.

I've got my own wars to wage.

And do you know, I went to a store in Brooklyn over the weekend and they just treated me like shit. So like, that's what I'm personally dealing with.

Yeah.

Like fighting for Kelly Clarkson's fucking life.

You feel like Munchausen, like it's happening to you?

No, but I do feel like a lot of people like flocked to my TikTok being like, what are you gonna think about Kelly? Like, our queen is wrong. And it's like, our queen is never wrong. But good luck. Like, thank you for showing yourself as a true hater and not a true Kelly fan. Can't wait to sit front row at her concert for $3.

Yeah, I think they spat in her face.

I think they smacked her.

Drop the footage. Every footage, every—

1,000%.

Cameras, especially when you got $15,000 goods on the wall.

What are you hiding? That's our show.

I actually don't think the footage would be conclusive. It would be like, you know, imperceptible, like looks and all subjective.

It would be inadmissible in court.

It would be inconclusive. Yeah.

Yeah, that's our show, you guys.

Both sides would use it to prove what they saw.

If you finished today's episode and like are still a Kelly Clarkson fan, just know you're a real one. Yeah. We see you.

And we'll see you on tour.

And I hope you're not a pitchy stripper. Title.

Oh, there's so many titles.

Pitchy stripper, Skrillex era. All right, you guys, well, we—

And also, I love Miley, so it wasn't even— it like—

Of course, it has nothing to do with Miley. Like, that's what people are not understanding.

I just think we've lost the art of being able to call Someone a pitchy stripper. And that's a shame, really.

And you know who I blame? Of course, Joan Rivers for passing away. Because if she was alive, like, we would still be able to do that. Mm-hmm.

Well, I mean, do I want to go there?

No,

no.

Sometimes, like, it's just okay to say—

Do you know what I would have said?

No, I have no idea where you're going.

I was gonna say—

oh, okay. Don't say it. Thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast in the Night Morning Show. We deliver the fast facts, stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found, such as Spotify, Stitcher, Pocket Video, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places where we sit and podcast. Find us at 825 Starview, the beautiful, stunning, and wiggly town that we are.

'Cause Joan could have said that.

But she's dead.

Blame the doctor.

Well, we should be blaming for everything in the world. We should be blaming the doctor who killed Joan Rivers in perpetuity for all things that are wrong in the world, because she— maybe not now, but like she would have lived She lived longer. She was a relatively healthy 82-year-old.

Yeah. No, she, she, she didn't just die.

In a vacuum. Like, she was killed. She was murdered. All right, have a great day everyone. We'll see you tomorrow.