Transcript of Caroline Rhea-adjacent: Tuesday, September 29th, 2026

Good morning, girlies, it's The Toast.

It's Jax and Claude and we're your hosts.

It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly, it's The Toast.

I sound amazing.

Welcome back to The Toast and happy Tuesday. Hope everybody's having a great second day of their week. I know I am, 'cause I'm sitting here.

I am as well, 'cause I'm sitting with you.

Oh my God, you like puffed your chest.

We're back together.

We drove separately though.

We did drive separately.

Which drives people nuts. Like over the summer, we talked about this on our Patreon.

But we're both driving electric cars, so you can't even say we're burning fossil fuels.

I did wanna follow up about, um, the vehicle because we made our music video in the parking lot as promised on TikTok. You know, special treat for people who follow me on TikTok and bonus content. Like we have Patreon. She refuses to post it to Instagram 'cause she You should be rewarded for following me on TikTok, all 400,000 of you.

Really? That's really good.

I know. Um, people were like, I thought you guys were joking, like you just got like a bigger car. No, no, it's like a bright red pickup truck. And I forgot to tell you guys, it's electric. Like, I've never driven an electric car before. You just go in and it starts. Like, you don't need a key or nothing. Well, you need the key, but you don't need to like turn on the engine. I mean, I drove solo today, which was not as fun. Oh, and I felt that I didn't get that sort of blue-collar respect I was getting. People were walking all over me today. Oh, I'm so sorry. And then something humiliating happened to me when I was parking. I don't know if you like saw, like we got here at the same time, but it took me a second to—

I saw you like going to do your thing, so I was just gonna let you do it in peace and privacy. I wasn't gonna like— because we have to back into our spots, which, you know, is a little bit challenging.

I backed into the spot and like as I'm fighting for my life, like I backed in—

And by the way, there were a million spots too.

By the way, a million open spots and I'm like straddled between 2 spots. I'm literally like Mandy Moore in 2 places at once. And this car in front of me is like passing by and like stops right in front of me. I'm like, excuse me, I'm trying to— and it's a toaster. And she's like, she obviously recognized the car. She was like, hi. She was trying to like roll down her window talking. And I'm like, I was so embarrassed.

Yeah.

Like, not only am I parking so poorly, like, I'm in this big bright red car. Like, she obviously looks at me as like a celebrity and like, here I am struggling. Stars, they're just like us. And I was like really not in my best self to like converse because I was really panicked about the parking spot. But she was in a Ford Expedition, which looked like a gorgeous car. I have my eyes out for cars now.

Claudia is looking for a new car.

For a new mom car. I think I've settled.

Yeah. Which is just so interesting. It's such a big decision. I feel like I keep trying to tell everyone like it is. And I also feel like there is, I mean, there's a lot of mom cars. Mm-hmm. But it just feels like there's not enough.

No.

And it's like, like we're missing something.

And I feel every time I get a car, I feel the same way. Like obviously my priorities are shifted. Like I need, you know, captain seats, God willing, for 2 car seats, whatever. But like, I'm still me and like, I am kind of shallow when it comes to like wanting like a Pargi, like sports car. So when we were in the Hamptons, Ben was like, look around, there's so many nice cars. Like, what do you like and what should we get? And the thing is, I only really like, like a Range Rover. I think it's cuz I was like brought up watching Real Housewives of like all the cities and like all the, they were cool moms driving Range Rovers. Like Range Rovers are so cool. I had a Range Rover. It was really not a great experience. Just like in terms of, they're kind of faulty, you know, they have lots of issues. And when I got one, everyone was like, you're gonna have to take it to the shop. And I was like, yeah, sure, whatever. The thing was in the shop the entire time.

That's, that's infuriating.

So I almost this time was like, let's just get another Range Rover cuz they're sick. Like they just are so cool. They're so Housewives. Um, But you know what? I've opted for safety and I think I feel like LeBron. I will be taking my talents to the Volvo dealership. I've heard great things about the CX90. Apparently it's like the safest car.

Yes.

And I feel like whenever I'm watching a TV show, like Your Friends and Neighbors, and they're trying to show like a really cool, like wealthy mom, like she has a Volvo, you know what I mean? It's like, it's very, it's very understated. Like you guys wouldn't understand, you know?

No, I went through this exercise myself. That car was also on my list.

It's on every mom's list.

Yeah. And so do it. And you know what? Like I wanna experience a new car.

I'm gonna do it.

New family.

I'm gonna do it. Yeah.

I'm excited for you. That's exciting. And just know if you see someone in a Range Rover, like, just know they're struggling.

And just so if you see someone, it's not all it's cracked up to be in a bright red electric pickup truck, like trying to back into their spot, just like, seriously, wish them the best. It's not, wish 'em the best. Like, I felt bad. I wanted to like converse and have a swirly chit-chat, but like I was actually sweating.

Yeah.

It was so embarrassing and I couldn't figure out, you know, when you get yourself into like a bind, like a parking bind that you can't like figure out what the logical thing is to do.

The physics behind like which way you should turn. Yes, exactly.

Like, I'm like, do I start over? And I didn't. So I just like kept readjusting. I must have done it like 4 or 5 times. It was trauma. Trauma.

I'm sorry you went through that. Your Volvo will never—

My Volvo. And Jackie says it like vulva.

No, I don't. How do you say it?

Volvo.

Volvo?

Yes.

Okay, but it's V-O-L-V-O.

Wait, you're saying it like V-U.

Volvo. Volvo.

Volvo. Now we're saying it too many times that like it's starting to sound weird.

Volvo.

Enjoy your Volvo. I will enjoy my Volvo.

Cool. Coolio.

It's Tuesday. We have Dear Toasters. I just picked them out. They're kind of crazy.

These stories are so weird.

Or bad.

Yeah, but we'll— we're gonna do our thing.

It doesn't matter because you wanna know why? Like, because we started watching Dancing with the Stars. Like, we— like, the future starts now.

We're saved tonight.

Tonight we'll be able to talk about—

There is a story, like, who— no, I didn't choose it because it's not that bad, but like what the stars are dancing to tonight.

No, I don't care. But Giselle, will we be able to feed off of Tuesday night's episode for like at least 2 more days? So while—

and we have Dear Sisters today. I'm not concerned, and I'm glad like nothing crazy's happening. We can just catch up, chit-chat. I've been loving Babylon. I just wanna say I added it to my liked songs.

Oh, that's huge.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

It's the only one so far that made it.

Um, if I were to choose songs to make it to my list, it would be Babylon and Cleveland. It's really, um, You know? Yeah, it's really growing on me. But Babylon, yes, it's definitely the best written song from the encore. And yeah, I guess sonically, it's not like a bop, but it's like— it feels like it would be on like— I saw somebody say it feels like the big sister of Renegade. Remember when she released that song Renegade with like a band she started?

Barely.

She like— her and Aaron Dessner.

You can't say Renegade.

I know, I know. It's sort of like she should have changed it something to something else. What was that band she started? Whatever, it was one of her greatest songs. I saw somebody say Babylon is like sort of like the sequel to it. It does sound similar. It's a great song.

Are you seeing people saying that Patient Zero sounds similar similar to Father Figure.

I've not seen people say that.

And I feel that because all of a sudden I have Father Figure back in my head, and it's coming from the undertones of Patient Zero.

Listening to Patient Zero without watching the music video is not as fun.

I agree.

Yeah, and I can't be like watching a music video like while I'm in the car, so for now it's just—

Yeah, now when I listen to it again, I'm like, back to my first thought.

Yeah, OG.

Yeah, but at least I can think about the music video and visualize it.

You dream about it. Um, Jack and I recorded a Patreon yesterday. Um, if you're not a Patreon member, I just feel like you're missing out on so many inside jokes.

Yeah, and just like so much more information.

Yeah. Um, we sort of keep like a part of ourselves guarded until we're on the Patreon, don't you find? Like, it's such a safe space.

That, and like the episodes are already so long that if—

Here, you mean?

Yeah, like that if we want to talk like more about ourselves, like there's no time. It feels like we've— we're out of time.

It's true. And like we're constantly releasing 90-minute episodes. It's actually insane. Our episodes Our episodes are getting longer.

How?

And we're getting like more interesting and funny. Isn't that interesting?

It is interesting. And I'll be curious today, like knowing the stories are direct, we do have Dear Toasters, but like how long it will be.

How far we can take this.

How far?

Yeah.

No, without even trying, like I'm just curious.

I actually feel like it'll be a normal episode because we got so much out of our system yesterday with like a big Monday catch-up. Yeah. We did like 15 pop culture stories and then we recorded a Patreon, which was just like a pregnancy TTC journey, conception, everything very Sexual episode, yeah, that's right, I said sex. So that's up on the Patreon now if you're curious about that at all. I just wanna say, sending Olivia Culpo lots of love. She means the world to me. I talked a lot about Olivia Culpo and what she means to me on this journey.

Yeah.

And I feel like—

And what her pregnancy means to you.

And how it affected me, kind of in a negative way. And I just wanna say, I don't feel like I led with the fact that I'm really happy for her. And I came off with my own jealousy.

You did, I think you did say, I was happy and then I was jealous.

No, no, no, but I wasn't. I was strictly jealous. And now that I'm at a place where I conceived, successfully, I can be like exclusively happy for her. But I feel like I didn't say that on the episode. So I just wanna say like Olivia Culpo, like while you were an integral part of my journey in a negative way, like now we're sisters bonded for life. And I just, I didn't lead with like the joy and the gratitude and like the being happy for someone.

Yeah.

So yeah, there's that kind of drama between me and Olivia Culpo on the Patreon if you wanna go check it out. patreon.com/toast.

Your twin mom.

Kind of my twin flame type of thing.

Celebrity playdate.

Yes.

You know.

If I had to have a celebrity playdate, it would unfortunately have to be at Olivia Culpo's house. Hopefully the one that she bought from George Clooney.

Hopefully with their furniture gone.

Yeah. Um, who's your like celebrity mom buddy?

Rihanna? Rihanna and Nicole Combs.

That's a good one. Mm-hmm.

Um, I'm like secretly— That would be a fun playdate.

I'm secretly hoping I'm not like, uh, projecting, predicting, cuz I don't think she is, but like kind of like need Hailey Bieber to be pregnant cuz then we would be like 2 for 2. Even though we barely crossed paths in the first pregnancy, we were both pregnant at the same time for like a brief period.

Yeah. Like me, Rihanna, and Nicole are like very, In sync. Aligned. Then if we wanted to get like a little bit more flexible on the timelines, like of course Lauren Lane.

Mm-hmm.

And Raven.

Of course Gates. Of course.

Raven was my twin for a while. So it's important to have celebrities to whom you feel connected.

It's kind of like—

In childbirth.

Birthday buddies. Next iteration is like your celebrity mom playdate. Hypothetical.

Labor buddies.

But I am open for a playdate, Olivia Culpo. Just want you to know.

Age gap buddies.

Age gap buddies.

Yeah. Like, like I'm sisters in sync. I met someone in real life who has like 3 boys, very similar ages to my boys. And I'm like, we need to have a playdate every day.

Yeah.

Do you wanna move in with us?

That's how I feel about Olivia Culpo. She's obviously welcome to move in with me, although based on what I know about her home, we should probably move in with her.

You should move in with her. It's looking amazing.

The place is great. It's looking amazing. I have been loving her home journey.

Did you see her kitchen wallpaper? 'Cause she just showed how Oliver Sprinkles, uh-huh, was like jumping.

That's kind of where Olivia Culpo and I differ in our pregnancy mama journeys is that like she had this dog, which she's had, it was basically her Thea.

Yes.

And I always say, like, if I was in this place now with Theo, I think I would feel differently. But I have this, like, new dog in my house, like, I literally don't know him.

Bless you.

And he peed in Jackie's new house over the weekend. And, like, seriously, like, I, I wanted to disown him, like, 1,000%. Um, but she has this dog who she, like, you know, had it probably for, like, 5 or 6 years before she gave birth, and he's been just, like, such an integral part of her motherhood journey, and she loves him, like, more than ever.

She loves him even more.

And we're sort of— that's kind of where we differ in our journeys, but I feel that other than that, we're pretty much just about to go.

Well, she posted a picture of Oliver Sprinkles, like, trying to get onto the high chair. Classic stuff.

Classic stuff. Romeo would be shot dead. No, I'm kidding.

I'm kidding.

I just want you guys to know I'm largely joking when I talk about Romeo. We've actually made, like, a lot of strides. He sleeps in the bed now. Um, I think he could definitely sense, like, the pregnancy hormones. He's been really good aside from the whole peeing on your new drapes.

Um, and the carpet.

And the carpet.

Yeah.

Um, the carpet was like such a little one. It like, it wasn't like the stain wasn't even a question. It came right out.

It wasn't an important carpet.

No, no. Um, the drapes were like brand new. Um, I am largely joking. Like, obviously I'm not like thrilled with everything he does, but we've really made a lot of strides.

Yeah.

But I'm not like at the Oliver Sprinkles level.

No, it's not giving Oliver Sprinkles. Anyways, she posted a picture of Oliver Sprinkles trying to get on the high chair and she, it was in the kitchen. The wallpaper was just looking bargy.

Her house looks really—

I look forward to your playdate. Make sure to take lots of pictures.

Yeah. I'll make sure to FaceTime you. Yeah. Hey, can I come over? The kids are playing. I'm like in the bathroom taking pictures of everything.

FaceTime me from the bathroom.

Um, so yeah, like, for the sake of the show, like, I guess.

Yeah, what else did we do yesterday? We did our Patreon, we had a party lunch.

Um, I actually became a Karen yesterday. I wanted to share the story of what I did at the restaurant.

What did you do?

The TV.

Oh, that's not Karen.

It's a little Karen. Let me tell you why. Because like, I wasn't personally with any children. We had an adult lunch. We were at a casual lunch place that had 3 TVs. Um, they were playing like sports. sports, and then like a daytime soap opera. Now maybe I'm new to the soap opera game or things have changed, but like there was an actual porn scene. I was shocked. I picked my head up in the middle of the day and there's porn.

Like literally porn. Yeah, they're like making out on the couch.

She's in a bra and underwear and he's not wearing a shirt.

Yeah.

They're making out so hard, like straddling, and it's like in the middle of the day. And like there was a baby next to me. Like I didn't have any kids with me, so like I could have just ignored it, but I felt that the restaurant should know. And I said to the waiter, I'm like, I'm sorry to be a Karen, but like I feel like maybe we should change the channel on that. I said it really nice and like in a cool, like I'm not like a loser type of way. I feel like maybe we should change the channel on that, um, TV, 'cause like it's kind of inappropriate. But obviously when I said it, like the scene was over.

Yeah.

So I just really looked like a Karen. But you know what? I stand by it. It felt wrong.

It felt like inappropriate. It was so weird.

It was so inappropriate.

And it's awkward, like for adults too.

Oh, I felt, I'm sitting with my sister, like, excuse me, that's disgusting. We saw like a table of friends were like, yeah, we were like, are you guys seeing what we're seeing? It was disgusting.

Yeah.

So that's kind of, kind of like a new notch in my belt for a 30-year-old woman.

30? 30. I'm not gonna even do the math. I, I don't know if you're being truthful.

I'm 30.

It's a good age.

Yeah.

Oh yeah, you were like— they did your turdy 30 and mahjong party. Yeah.

Next subject. Um, wasn't it 30?

Yeah, I'm cracked turd. Yeah. What was it?

30 Turdy. That's what it was.

Okay, well let's get into this.

Oh, by the way, big news in the mahjong world. New Love Shack Fancy x Oh My Mahjong collab. Jackie and I got the tiles. We haven't had a chance to play with it yet, but it's like so hard.

We tried to like play last night, but our game fell through.

I'm trying to like think of an equivalent, like collab. It's kind of like Fendi Skims, like literally groundbreaking. Yeah.

Or like, I mean, every collab like Love Shack Fancy does is like similar, but like Love Shack Fancy Noona wasn't for the boy moms. Mm-hmm. But happy for the girl moms. Love Shack Fancy stan.

I feel like that like reset a generation.

But Love Shack Auntie on my mahjong, like tiles racks.

Yeah, we haven't even opened it yet. Like, I'm so excited.

Yeah, we need to do like an unboxing and we need to play. We don't have like a game on and that's sort of problematic.

We will, we will.

Oh, if you want to hear about Turdy's latest thoughts on mahjong, you'll have to head to the Patreon.

There's a— that's what I'm saying. Like, the Patreon we recorded yesterday, I feel that you— if you really want to know me and like what I'm going through and like what I've been going through, gotta head to the Patreon.

Yeah, um, I think we should get into the stories.

I think we do.

I'd like— because, you know, I've hyped them up so much to be so terrible. They'll probably be good, actually.

Yeah.

Uh, without further ado, it is time for the Fast Five Stories that you need to know.

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One of our favorite collabs.

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Okay, first story, a bit of an update in, um, the Giudice family drama. So dashcam, police dashcam footage of the altercation at the airport—

It's so bad.

Has come out, um, and there were some, you know, quotable moments. Teresa telling Melania that she wants to save her life. Teresa claiming that Melania had fentanyl in her system during the clash. Um, Melania responded, 'cause I was laced, I go to college. And then after this footage came out, which is pretty explosive—

And then she also has like a video on her phone. She's like, I posted it, I posted it. So I think that was the video we saw where like, I love you, I love you, I love you.

And then Milani's like, is this what we're doing now? Is this what we're doing now?

Right.

Um, that she posted that video, and now this is the police dashcam footage because they were escorting them through the airport.

Body cam.

Oh, right, because they didn't have— they're not— body cam footage.

It's so upsetting.

It's so upsetting. And then Teresa's put out a statement.

Oh, has she?

About the situation. It's actually really heartbreaking. This is what it says. She said, as a mother, there's nothing more important to me than the health, safety, and well-being of my children. The past few months have been incredibly difficult for our family, and I feel it is important to say something while also protecting my daughter during an extremely vulnerable time in her life. Melania has experienced tremendous heartbreak and significant psychological trauma after losing 2 of her best friends. Grief affects everyone differently, and watching your child try to process that kind of loss is something no parent can ever truly prepare for. Right now, my only focus is my daughter, making sure she is surrounded by love, family support, and the care that she needs. I understand that because our family has lived much of our lives in the public eye, there will naturally be questions and speculation, but Melania is my daughter before she's anything else.

Sorry, you had to.

I— sorry, I skipped the—

by the way, never apologize. You absolutely did. It's from Teresa.

She's a young woman going through an incredibly difficult and deeply personal time, and she deserves the opportunity to heal without every moment of her pain being analyzed publicly. I am asking from one mother to another and from one family to all of you to please show Melania compassion and kindness and allow her the privacy she needs right now. We are incredibly grateful to everyone who's reached out with love, prayers, and and support. It means more to our family than you know. At this time, we respectfully ask the media and the public to give Melania and our entire family the privacy and space we need as we navigate this together. Thank you for your understanding, your compassion, and most importantly, for respecting my daughter during this difficult time. Message received.

1000%. I have to say, like, I watched Teresa on TV my whole life. Like, she did not write that statement, but whoever did, like, nailed every single point. You have my utmost privacy. Like, girl, I'm not getting involved. I really want the— like, you know, I'm very much in my soft Teresa era, and this situation just, like, broke my heart even further. I was also very surprised at her composure. Like, Gia was the one like kind of ushering them into the elevator and being like classic Gia, first daughter, very mature. And Teresa, we know, is sort of to be the one to like fly off the handle and be sort of impulsive. I was really impressed with how she handled the situation like very calmly, like kind of the anti-Tri.

Yeah, very measured.

Yeah.

Just like supportive as much as she can be and not like, you know, going at each other.

Clashing.

One, yeah, we don't really have a full understanding of like what's going on with Melania. And 2, like especially after this statement, like I won't be—

I'm not pressing further, you know? Yeah. Although I just want to say like, and I like that she didn't like accuse people because we only know about this because Gia put— like they shared it with, uh, sorry, Melania.

Of course.

So it's like we will butt out of it, but like you open the door. But not— I'm not like blaming you.

Even still, the door was open and I'll close it myself. We won't walk through it.

100%. I'm not gonna.

And I don't really want to because I don't know what's going on. going on.

Yeah, and I did see like over the past couple of weeks and months Melania posting all about her friend who passed away, which is just like so sad. So I'm sure there's a lot going on that we don't know about. Um, and I truly like, I wish them the best. They've been through so much, that family. It's honestly surprising that they haven't had like more issues, like just growing up in the spotlight, the trauma with their parents, legal issues, divorce, deportation. Like, they're entitled to— you know, I actually did see like a therapist, like, hi, I'm— I just want to say, if your therapist is making TikToks, like, you need a new therapist. I'm sorry, there are certain people who should not be making TikToks. And I don't know if this is gonna get me canceled, but like, if you're a teacher, you can make TikToks like in your home. I actually don't even think that you should, honestly. But in your classroom is crazy. Like, not even— even I see a lot of teachers who do it like not with their kids. Like, there's not a kid in it ever, but it's like you're making TikToks in your classroom.

Like, I just think that's inappropriate. Healthcare workers, sorry, you are banned from TikTok, I think. Sorry. And therapists, like, oh my God, the therapists. And they're like analyzing— here's my take on Melania Giudice as a So take this with a grain of salt because, you know, but she said that it looks like Melania has oppositional defiance disorder, which is ODD.

Where have I heard that before?

I don't know, probably chapter 3 of my New York Times bestselling memoir, because I too went to like a child therapist when I was super young, 'cause I was like such a bad kid. Like I had such like rage issues and they said I probably had oppositional defiance disorder and they like wanted to put me on meds. My parents were like, okay, thanks for letting us know, but like, we'll talk to you later. Um, I just sort of like, kind of grew out of it. Um, but I guess it can hit you later in life.

Yeah.

And you can pick up my memoir because you don't need to respect my privacy. Amazon.com or wherever you purchase books.

Um, that's so crazy.

I know. And you know what, like we were saying yesterday—

That she reminds you of a young you.

A young me, like very energetic.

And like you at your bat mitzvah is Melania Giudice on The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

But me at my bat mitzvah was like me channeling all my energy in a positive way because obviously like the day was about me.

She channels her energy in a positive way Most of the time. On the show when she was like a rambunctious child, but she also just like had an attitude and had— it was very—

And it was perfect for TV.

Yeah.

Yeah, but when you are this type of like authority-defying, energetic young woman, sometimes you don't know where to put that energy and it like comes out in negative ways.

No, and if you're that sort of—

I thought it was a good diagnosis.

It is. And if you're that sort of child, it's like, yeah, you maybe grew out of it or like learned to resist it. Um, but if you don't, how that presents itself. But again, I'm giving privacy. That's just, you know.

Yeah, of course. And you know how like if you work in finance, like you're literally not allowed to be on social media, like making content? Yeah, like famously Acquired Sister gave up her job at Goldman Sachs, um, because she was making content. They were like, girl, it's us or them, and she chose TikTok. And I think she made the right choice, of course. Um, I think they should have more industries like that. Like, it's really insane.

Yeah, I agree.

I feel like people are gonna get mad that I said that because like I'm not coming for teachers. Like, I love teachers, I love healthcare workers, and I know that's like a very proud group, both of them. But I'm sorry, I do feel like you shouldn't be able to make TikToks. I do.

Yeah, in your place of work.

In your, in your place of work, absolutely. And I think like a healthcare worker, like, yeah, go make your OOTDs. Like, that has nothing to do— but like a teacher, I don't know, like your students can see it.

It's touchy when your students—

I think that even if you're a teacher or a therapist you shouldn't make TikToks either.

Yeah, in like a public manner, you know?

Yeah, like imagine you go to therapy and you see your client— you're like, later on, because you have their phone number now, you get connected and you see an OOTD of your therapist. Like, I just think that not everyone can and should do content on social media.

Would you rather see an OOTD of your therapist or like your therapist talking about therapy?

OOTD, because it's completely removed. I would feel that my privacy was compromised if like you're over here talking about therapy. And I've seen people like therapists on TikTok being like, you know, I once had a client. It's like, girl, shut up. Like, even though you're not saying who it is, stop.

It's someone else's business.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's like there are a couple of industries that—

Or you could just not be on TikTok like me.

Well, why should we say that?

Come over to Reels.

No, I'm talking about Reels too.

Reels, we don't have these problems.

You don't have Reels, but a lot of creators like upload their content to Reels as well.

Yeah, and then Reels suppresses it because—

As they should.

They say no, you just want to watch them Hoffers and Ari Lyndyke build a chicken coop.

Did you see Ari Lyndyke's been alone with the kids for 6 days? I'm obsessed with Ari Lyndyke. Yeah, um, and he like sort of like on day 6 he was just like, fuck it, he ordered Chinese food and let the kids eat dinner in front of the TV. Like, um, I'm obsessed.

Where's Lauren?

I don't know, he didn't say. I was like, is she filming Traitors? Like, I literally didn't know where she was, but I don't think she is.

No, I don't think she is. Well, she's not in the cast and it's not really her personality type.

No, they—

She also just finished breastfeeding, so maybe she like took herself on a trip.

A trip.

Like a girls trip.

The Linedykes very much like, not retired from public life, but they don't like put themselves— Ari was on season 1 of Traitors.

Yeah.

Like before it was even, even a thing. And beyond that, I feel like they just really like influencing and making good money and like having a family at home. Like, I don't think, I, I don't think they want those opportunities. So no, I don't think she's on Traitors.

I actually could see them and they might even like be on like HGTV or something.

Very like low stakes.

But they're not like on the reality star hamster wheel. No.

But Arie like almost was, but I feel like—

He could be, and I think he gets tapped for stuff. I mean, he was the lead, so like that is— there's only so many people who are that lead and they do want Bachelor people, so I think he gets asked to do stuff.

Yeah, um, and they have like an interesting— I feel like the way that Tyler Cameron's getting reintroduced to a young audience on Dancing with the Stars, kids these days don't know about Arie choosing Becca, right? And then like breaking up with her, and now they're together, they have 5 kids. Like obviously he made the right choice, but you had to be there, you guys. That was insane.

It was.

Only twice happened in Bachelor history.

It makes sense.

Of course, it could be very confusing.

Yeah, I feel like, and by the final 2, it's really down to like your head and your heart.

And you sometimes— or sometimes like, it's like for Kaitlyn Bristowe. I know I always bring them up and I'm so toxic because she's moved on. It was always gonna be Shawn.

Of course.

Sometimes it's like so obvious.

It wasn't even thinking about it.

No, but sometimes I feel like Ben Higgins like really loved JoJo and Lauren, like, and he didn't know what to do.

You think so?

I don't think he was right for either of them. And no matter who he would have chosen, it wouldn't have worked out.

You think so?

Yeah.

That's so interesting.

'Cause like Jordan— JoJo was always meant to be with Jordan.

Of course. But you don't think it was hard for her to break up with Robbie?

I don't. Whoever had to break up with Chase McNary, now that was hard.

But Robbie was her final 2. And that's a smart move, is to bring someone that you know you don't like all the way.

That's what I mean. Like for Jordan— for JoJo, it was always Jordan.

Yeah, it was.

Like some seasons—

The women are a little bit—

Decisive.

Better at knowing—

But Clare was always Dale.

What's right for them.

Yeah.

Yes, for Clare, it was always Dale.

That was also a crazy season. And I feel like we never even talked about the fact that I'm pretty sure Kaitlyn Bristowe is still dating Zac Clark, whom was engaged to Tayshia. And Kaitlyn and Tayshia were like best friends. That's kind of like one of the biggest scandals in Bachelor history that went under the radar because Kaitlyn and Zac never— yeah.

But I do feel like they can come out now.

Yeah, I feel like enough time has passed, even though Tayshia definitely hates Kaitlyn.

Oh, for sure. And hate her forever. That's totally fine, right?

It's sort of like a Something Kaitlyn had to be okay with.

Yeah.

It's like something borrowed.

Like losing a friend and you're choosing like this great love, or what you think will be a great love, like West and Amanda. But at this point, if Kaitlyn and Zac are still together, then they might be together longer than Zac and Tayshia were.

Correct.

And like, in which case, I think like they can move on happily, and, and I think they can come out.

They can come out of hiding. They are, they are actually like in hiding.

Are they still? That would be crazy if they're still together.

I'm almost 100% sure that they are.

But she's like very public and shares a lot about her life, so like, does she say— I don't know.

I feel like it must really negatively impact like her ability to podcast.

Well, does she just talk about her boyfriend and just like everyone knows?

Nameless, faceless.

And everyone knows, but we just don't say his name?

Maybe.

That is crazy. And if it ever does erupt, it will. It is sort of like something that's bubbling under the surface and it will erupt, but I think it will be okay.

What was the story?

Ari Lyndyke. No, but Melania and Harry. Oh, okay.

I was like, did we ever move on past the first story? See, look at us, 90 minutes, here we come.

I don't even want to— oh, you— because of therapists on TikTok.

Yeah. Oh wow, we've really gone far. Oh, Ari Lyndeck's home with the kids for 6 days. Yeah, one thing, it always comes back to Ari Lyndeck's Instagram. The way that like the original Call Her Daddy was obsessed with Ari Lyndeck's social media in a negative way, like we're kind of taking that and channeling it in really positive way. Yeah, I find myself like constantly— I'm about to get those outdoor like seats that he got. Like I'm so influenced by him.

Yeah. Yeah. Our next story. Okay, so I think some Netflix doc news that you will care about. Matthew Perry is getting a Netflix doc called The One About Matthew Perry. The trailer just dropped.

Oh, that's really cute.

It's about the late Friends star's career, his $7 million sobriety journey, and more.

Who's in it? Like, did any of the Friends sit for it? He's actually also like very, um, like his family's really interesting too.

Yeah. So the, um, trailer was 2 minutes. It dropped. It chronicles his experience with fame and the realization that it wasn't not actually everything he wanted. Uses testimonies from his sister Mia Perry-Bowick, several other close friends, and unreleased photos and videos from the Perry family's private archive. The 3-part series explores his career as a beloved actor and comedian while also revealing details about his long-term struggle with drug use and his attempts to get sober. Um, the release of the film will come on the 3rd anniversary of his death.

Okay, so none of the friends are involved, although it seems like this is sanctioned by his family because they're like providing footage and stuff.

Yeah, material.

Um, let me tell you, if you're gonna watch this, read his book. Like, it is one of the best celebrity memoirs. Obviously I've always liked Friends. I was never really a Chandler gal, honestly. I found him so annoying. Um, but it totally changed my perspective on him. It's one of the best, most honest memoirs probably I've ever read. It's up there with like Open Book. Like, it's insane what Matthew Perry went through. Like, not only as like a big celebrity, but like just his childhood too. So good. I'm sure this is just gonna be like sort of a Cliff Notes version of the book because the book is like, it's done for you. You can make a documentary out of the book.

Except it's not completed because it doesn't have the ending.

Oh, true, true.

So like, what, his final year of sobriety?

Yeah, but even though the ending of the book was like sort of not foreshadowing, but like—

Inconclusive.

Yeah, because he didn't say like, I've got it.

Yeah.

He was like, this is something I'll struggle with for my whole life. He had, you know, really long bouts of sobriety, like 10 years. And you think after 10 years, like, okay, I've got it under control. But then he would relapse again, and he was like, I probably will relapse again. And he The financial element of it was so crazy too. So like the amount of money he spent on rehabs, those are like drug—

$7 million.

It's insane. It's insane. It was such a good memoir. And I'll probably watch this too.

I feel like you will, 'cause you really like his memoir. Really—

It was one of the best books, 100%. What was it called? Bad name. It was like Lovers and Friends, Your Neighbors. It was like, what the hell was it called? Oh, and the big terrible thing. Friends, lovers, and the big terrible thing.

Friends, lovers, and the big terrible thing. That's not so bad.

It's not?

Because it sounds like that's what the book was about. Friends, the show.

Lovers. He actually had a lot of very famous romantic interests. He doesn't name them, but you can piece it together based on like public information.

Yeah, and the big terrible thing.

Yeah, right. And the big— like, there's certain things you pick up from books that you remember your whole life, right? Like, I remember him saying that he was like a colicky baby, and back in the day they used to give like narcotics to colicky babies because his mother was like at her wit's end and she took him to the doctor after like literally 3 months of not one wink of sleep. And it was very common, like it wasn't illegal or anything, like the doctors would just give you a narcotic. And he really feels that he had this like chemical attraction since birth, literally, to narcotics, which was like one of the many things that he struggled with. Um, and I was like, okay, that's crazy.

That is crazy. Yeah.

And, um, like just little nuggets from the book that I remember, like he literally— I believe at the time of his death was like, had a colostomy bag. Like, he had made himself so sick with drugs that like it was affecting his health so poorly that he ended up in a coma. And I don't think he could properly digest. I believe he had a colostomy bag. Like, it was really crazy.

Oh wow.

And he didn't even care. Like, he literally left the hospital and got drugs.

Yeah.

I wonder if John Mulaney's gonna write a memoir. I feel like he would be a good memoir person.

Probably at some point.

Yeah, maybe he's still like living.

Yeah. I love young kids. So maybe he wants to like have more parenthood.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Before he looks in the rearview.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story? It's like a small bit of news, but it's quite shocking. It appears as though Jesse Draper has bought a house with Marciano Brunette. So Jesse Draper from Secret Lives of Mormon Wives posted a video on Reels saying, new beginnings loading, and it's her in an empty home with Marciano Brunette. She's running into his arms, he's picking her up and swinging And then the caption is, I'm still dizzy.

Okay, this is a very fine line for me to walk because, as you know— and we also need to talk about the fact that Jenna Affleck was wearing, um, Morning Toast— Morning, am I okay? Toast merch in her Instagram story yesterday.

She was wearing a Pargy t-shirt, which is pretty new.

No, and not only that, like, there may be some merch items of ours you could wear if you have no idea what the Toast is, like sort of generic.

Like, Pargy?

Yeah, right, Pargy. Like, that's a very in-the-know—

I'm just like hoping she borrowed it from Jesse and just liked the fit and didn't give it back because because, um, I like hope she didn't hear what we said.

Kind of hope she did, you know? Maybe it's sort of the wake-up call that she needs. Like, from one— she's kind of like my— in my pregnancy circle as well. We're 2 for 2. I mean, she has 4 kids, but the bottom 2.

The bottom 2. Yeah, you could have like a littles playdate. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, the kids are like, you know, at the park or something. Sorry, back to Jessie Draper. It's a fine line to walk because I know she listens to the show and I know she loves us and I love her. And I told you, Jesse, like, I have not gotten to the Marciano redemption arc yet. Like, we have not seen— the last episode I just saw, he was like taking a trip, like literally being so thirsty with Chase. Like, yucky. Like, anyone who associates with Chase to me is like so disgusting. So I'm having a really hard time like understanding. And also like, I'm tired for you. Like, you just moved. We just watched you and you moved for no reason. Like, you just hated the energy in your old house. So you and Jordan like got a new house to like help your marriage. Then you ended up getting divorced.

Well, still like thinking that you're gonna get divorced.

Yeah.

And they didn't even go in it with the intention of like, like, this will be our new start. It's like, we just want to get rid of that and still have the same vibe.

So like, I don't even feel like you needed to sage the energy out of the house that you just moved into because Jordan was barely there. He was there for 5 minutes. Um, moving is expensive. It's exhausting. Like, I'm tired for you.

Yeah.

I also like, I just, I don't get the Marciano hype because like, as far as I know, he lied on you. He tried to ruin your life. He's so thirsty. He gives me the ick. Um, but like, that's your man, your man, your man. So I don't know, because like, you are one of my faves, and like, I'm trying to learn to trust you, but without more context, like, it's very difficult.

It is difficult. I don't know, I feel like I would need to watch Vanderpump Villa.

Oh, I'm sorry, and like, who paid for the house?

Well, I'm sure her. I'm sure. And like, they're not actually like moving in together. I hope—

That's what the video said.

No, but like, I hope she paid for the house so that like she can kick him out at any time. Like, they're not—

How could he have paid for the He doesn't have a job.

In order to like make a judgment on his like personality or character, I would have to watch Vanderpump Villa, you know?

Is that a risk Camille would take?

Because everything that I've seen on Samu's obviously been negative about him.

So bad.

She does seem like really happy and in love, but what you see on social media is not oftentimes real life. But like the story that she's telling on social media—

It's symbolic.

The web that she's spinning is beautiful.

I know, like I want it so desperately for her to be true.

But like, could it possibly be this good?

Like, I guess like you really don't know don't know people from TV, but like, I've only been given these 10 episodes of Marciano to judge. Like, I don't know him from anything else, and the only stuff I've seen is like so bad.

Yeah.

I've not seen one redeeming qual— I guess like when he came and told the truth after all the lies, like that's supposed to be redemptive, but I haven't seen one thing that I would be like, yeah, that's the guy I wanna date my friend.

Yeah. Yeah.

I also feel, and I think she touched on this a little bit, and you can see it through her like various plastic surgeries, I feel like she has a real confidence issue, Jessie. I think it came from like being with an actual like verbally abusive husband. Like he definitely like berated her. Um, and I feel that she doesn't really know like how great she is. And I think then also being on social media, like you get those Secret Lives fans are so crazy, like so much negativity. So maybe in case somebody told you, Jesse, like you're very pretty and you have an amazing personality and like you're a good mom and a good friend and like a great businesswoman too. And it's like, you don't like need to accept Jordan and Marciano. Like—

What if Marciano was like a, a fine good guy?

It's possible. Yeah, but what if he's not?

What if he's not?

So I just feel like, in case somebody's told you that, like, you are great. And I could see you having like some real self-confidence and like self-esteem issues after being married to the craziest man on the planet. And like legit, like an evil one too.

What sparks a bit of concern for me, because I'm gonna just operate— I'm gonna trust my faith that like— I don't know why, I just feel like Marciano might have gotten like bad at it. And he could be like cute and sweet, whatever.

Okay, putting Marciano in the same—

yeah. What sparks a bit of concern for me is like the timeline and getting out. First of all, I think she was married before Jordan, right? And then they— she moved on with Jordan and then she met Marciano while she's with Jordan. And like, when, when will the healing start? You know? Right.

She needs to be with Jesse self.

A little bit. And just like, like reset, you know? Uh, even if Marciano's like a good guy and potentially right for her, like this is just like a lot of change. She also has like a young child, like she has children, but what the— her youngest is is maybe 2 years old. Like, that's a lot. Yeah, to go through the business, like, but to have babies and then a divorce and then a new man and a new house and another new house, and it's, it's just like a lot.

And then also like getting famous.

Like, I would just like for her to like settle.

Yeah, absolutely.

That's my concern.

No, it's a, it's a valid concern, and we come from a place of like genuine love and concern.

But if the story that she's telling like is as his Pargis, it appears. Like, that's so cute. The house looks great. He— like, if you just watch it like from afar without any part— that's a happy girl jumping into the arms of—

What I've learned from The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is you can never believe what's on social media.

That's completely fucking true.

Yeah, like, objectively, I'm happy for these 2 random people, but when I zoom in and I see it's Marciano, like, I am— I have concerns. I have concerns.

Yeah, you don't understand.

I want to, but I don't understand.

Okay.

I don't.

Are you ready for our next story?

What number? Number 4.

Yep. Which is actually such a crazy story that I couldn't believe the headline that I had to read it to you. And I need you to wait for all the details. Okay? Okay.

And when you like read the stories, when we're in person together, I try not to look at your iPad to like spoil. So yeah, I have, I've been, I haven't been looking today.

Watch Michael Bublé and Drew Scott's And what? Watch Michael Bublé and Property Brothers Scott, not Zooey.

Not Zooey Deschanel, okay.

Watch their junior hockey team fight for its first championship in 19 years in a raw look at the new series called Hometown Giants.

Okay? Okay.

Drew Scott from Property Brothers and Michael Bublé own a—

From Hell.

junior hockey team.

Together?

Yeah, more than that. They now—

And what's a junior hockey team, like a Little League?

I think it's like— they don't look little, they look medium.

Okay.

And their team now has a show called Hometown Giants. It's a series that will chronicle the Western Hockey League's Vancouver Giants, a junior hockey team that Bublé has been a minority owner of since December 2008, and Scott in 2023, as they try for their first championship in Must watch, first of all. Like, what?

Yeah. Um, one thing about me, I have like a list of people who I hate forever and always, and like Michael Bublé is at the top of the list. And some people have come off the list, you know, like Sam Hunt recently graduated.

Um, just the one?

No, I feel like I'm sort of like loosening up a little bit on like Robert Herjavec. Like most of the time when I make fun of him now, it's like a joke.

He was separated.

Yeah, right. Um, to me, I've seen the Instagram Live of Michael Bublé, and I will never ever take him off the list. So no, I won't be supporting this. I won't.

Okay, but what do you think about this? If you could like—

Dumb. Cashing in on the hockey trend right now, like Hito Rivalry, uh, off campus, and now like the new, new one, Icebreakers. Like, this is like—

And the Olympics.

Oh, of course. Quinn Hughes, Jack, uh, Tate. Yeah, this is just sort of like How do these two know each other? Literally nightmare blunt rotation.

Property Brothers just find themselves in like such high places.

Zoe Deschanel.

So I, um, that's during Yom Kippur. I watch, um, AD's like now Open Door series is on Netflix.

Yes, it is. And you watch Zoe's?

I watched Zoe's because like I'm, you know, decorating my house. So I was like, oh, I could go for some inspo. But like a lot of the ones are not for me, so I only watched a couple. And I watched Zoe and Property's.

They have an amazing apartment.

And I had seen theirs on Instagram before, but this was the long video. Like there was details that I hadn't seen before. Their apartment is so amazing.

And it's a real testament to, I think, like her style, cuz she's like very quirky and his, you know, capability, experience, right? As a contractor and real estate broker to the stars.

You have to, if you haven't watched the whole thing, and it's cool that the series is now on.

I saw Kendall Jenner's face and I was like, oh, what's that?

I watched Bebe Rexha's. No. Oh no, I didn't. Oh, I watched Rita Ora. Yep.

I'm cracking up. Like common mistake.

No, classic.

I mean, classic mix-up.

Rita Ora is just so fabulous.

I know she gets like a bad rap ever since she like kind of spoke to my soul on The Masked Singer.

No, I know, she was so nice to you.

She was so nice. She said, she— I love your podcast, you host with your sister, right? So nice. Obviously, like, you know, her career shook out in like ways we didn't think it was going to. I think like she kind of become like the butt of a joke sometimes, but she's really like a nice lady.

But didn't she marry really well?

Yes, she did.

So it's like not that serious for her. So she's fine. And so she was showing off her house in London, but it's like really like a home and it looks looks like something out of a storybook because she bought it from this artist Arthur Rackham. So you're probably like, who's that? But if you look at all the fairy tales, like Grimm's Brothers fairy tales, he did all the illustrations, and it was just so charming.

Yeah, she lives well.

It was just such an interesting episode. And then I watched Gwyneth's. Have you watched Gwyneth's?

No.

It was insane. She showed us a couple rooms, like her kitchen and her foyer.

Did she say where she lives? Is it Montecito?

Where does she live? She didn't say, but I think that's her Montecito house. Yeah, she had talked about in their LA home they had done this.

Okay.

And this was their new house that from the ground up. And they have like a spa. They have a whole spa, cold plunge, hot tub, everything. It was just insane.

I need to watch that.

Yeah.

'Cause she is the blueprint. Like everybody, like all the farm to table, like she is that girl. Like she is OG growing her own food.

Yeah.

And cold plunging and master cleansing. Like she really invented that genre.

Yeah. No, her house was amazing. She had like the wall of blue plates. Like it was just really—

I need to watch that.

Oh, so anyways, back to Property. Mad respect for Property.

Yeah, no, he really showed off his talents. And I don't know, do they still have Property? Like, are there new HGTV shows? I used to be like so in the HGTV universe and then like the Hacks kind of ruined it. Or what's their last name? El Moussa's.

HGTV is like the Property Brothers show is like, like low in the totem pole of HGTV stars.

Like they were not—

Also like the projects they were doing were what? Like just like general small hometown flips, you know, $100,000 budget. Yeah, but the apartment, like the millwork, everything was just such a— at such a high level, and that was him. And I was like, oh, I didn't know you could do that and that.

Yeah, no, I think that maybe like the experience that got them a reality show was different than what they ended up doing on the reality show, 'cause the reality show is really for all Americans to see themselves. Oh, I could do that with my house. I saved this amount of money. Um, but maybe they are like true artisans in their craft.

And now they have a documentary.

Absolutely will not be watching this.

Um, hockey's the next frontier, you guys. It is.

I just feel like people are like slap— slapping hockey on their shows now just to make it like heated rivalry or off-campus.

But it's like also it's a mix of like off-campus and that Kim Kardashian show.

Oh, or like that Ryan Reynolds football show, Wrexham.

Oh yeah, that too. But like, you know, about parents, like, you know, I don't know.

Team Moms. Yeah.

I feel like people barely want to go to their own kids' Yeah, do you know what Ben's— Do you know what Ben's— let alone watch someone else's.

I ain't watching.

This is for you.

Oh, look at this picture of Michael Bublé, who like kind of grew out his hair in like a curly little fashion. And that Property Brother— so there were 2 Property Brothers, obviously. Well, there's actually 3, but nobody talks about the 3rd one. And in the TV show, there was one who was like sort of like the manly contractor who was like always wearing like a belt. That's the one who married Zooey Deschanel. This one— I apologize, I don't know either of their names. I know there's a Drew and a Jonathan. I think this is Jonathan.

No, it's true. I'm looking at the headline.

Okay. And he was sort of like the more dapper— he was the real estate agent who would like find the properties and he was always like dressed sort of like metrosexual. So they were actually very— I don't know if they're twins.

That's a throwback word.

Well, like, I don't know how else to say it. Like, he was always like very like refined. Like, whereas like the other brother was like in a lumberjack shirt.

Yeah.

Slinging sledgehammers.

I understood what you meant. It was good. But nobody uses that word anymore.

It's a great word. It is.

Because we all know—

It's like when you're not gay.

Because we all know what you meant. Yeah, of course.

Like suave.

Yeah.

And, um, obviously Zooey Deschanel went for like the more masculine.

Interesting.

Yeah.

Um, also just in a side note that I saw in the comments yesterday that I had to mention is that when we were talking about the Hairspray live cast—

Oh yeah.

And how it was really nearly perfectly cast, Derek Hough was Corny Collins.

And that's an amazing cast.

Which is fucking perfect.

It's an— that is an amazing idea, so congrats to whoever did that.

They've hid that Hairspray Live. You can't find it.

Really?

Yeah, because it was like just so like not what it should have been. I don't think you can watch it, but if anybody knows where we could find— I mean, I guess you can find everything on Amazon Prime.

Yes, or like on YouTube, somebody filming it with their phone.

We need to watch it.

Yeah, toast movie of the week, 100%. Before we dive into the remainder of the show, let me let you know that today's episode is brought to you by Whatnot. Whatnot. So Whatnot is a really special app where you can do live shopping in the US. All the shopping happens in real time with real people, real conversation, and amazing deals. So a lot of people come to Whatnot for a lot of different reasons. One, because the deals— you almost never pay full price. You can shop name brands across makeup, perfume, clothes, handbags, jewelry, and more, all without the retail sticker shock. So it's really the best place to find great deals on products you love. I actually shop a lot of makeup on Whatnot. I got like amazing like Patrick Ta products, which which are really expensive, like almost $40 for a blush. I got amazing pricing on Whatnot. Um, a lot of people go to Whatnot to become sellers. If you have clothes, bags, or accessories that are just sitting in your closet that you no longer reach for, Whatnot makes it easy to turn them into cash. Connect with shoppers who share your style and have fun going live while doing it.

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That's D-O-A-S-E-D-A-I-L-Y. dosedaily.co/toast for 35% off your first month subscription. dosedaily.co/toast. Today's episode is also brought to you by Square. So when you think about all your favorite local businesses, whether that's like a cafe, a boutique, or a restaurant, they're probably using Square, and that's why your life is so amazing. So Square is a platform that's built for the behind the scenes of so many businesses that you already love and you might not even know. So whether someone sells smoothies, they cut hair, fix bikes, run a boutique, Square basically gives them one connected system. Mm-hmm. To take your payments, manage their inventory, run payroll, send invoices, and track it all from one place. So it's not just a point of sale. Square actually includes hardware that works in person and on the go. It's great, um, software for managing staff, marketing, customer insights. They also offer banking tools like Square Checking so you can get paid instantly. Businesses love it because it just makes running a business feel a little less like putting out fires constantly, and it really simplifies the messy stuff. You don't need an IT team or a degree in accounting. It's gonna grow with you.

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Thank you, /turt.

You're welcome.

Our 5th and final story, Sabrina the Teenage Witch cast announced a 30th anniversary reunion tour.

Oh my God, I mean, like, no one's gonna be more excited about this than Ben Zafer.

Does he love Sabrina?

Well, he, I think, like, watched and enjoyed the show with all of us as young women.

Yeah.

But he loves the reboot, Rider Ross's version with Kiernan Shipka.

That has nothing to do with it.

Oh, they're not including Kiernan?

No, no, no. The casting—

Was that sort of like an unauthorized—

Yeah, yeah, that was just like taking the characters from the comic and doing their own thing. It has nothing to do with like the show that we all watched in the '90s.

Melissa Joan.

Melissa Joan Hart, who played the titular Sabrina.

And that queen who was on, um, last season of Dancing with the Stars, right? The aunt. There were 2 aunts, like one who was really tall and one who was like shorter.

Yeah.

The shorter one was on Dancing with the Stars? Yeah, and remember her— one of her friends and family was Alec Baldwin. Oh no, he was there for Hilaria. I made that up. She had an interesting—

I think she was on this last year.

Yes, she was.

Beth Broderick?

No, the other one. Read me the names.

Caroline Rhea Salinas?

Yes, Caroline Rhea was on Dancing with the Stars.

You're lying.

Spell her last name. R-E-A.

Yeah.

Dancing.

This last year that I watched?

No, I'm making that up.

And remember this auntie?

She wasn't on season 34, right?

Do you remember this auntie? That's the one.

That's Caroline Rhea!

I love her.

Yeah. Was she not on Dancing with the Stars? Like, am I actually making that— guys, why am I— what's that called? Mandela effect? Like, why do I think that?

Well, see what she's been up to. Just Google her. Maybe you saw her somewhere else.

Like, did she come as someone's friend of? Like, I'm so confused. Like, I would have taken that to my grave.

Was she on Dancing with the Stars?

Why do I have a memory of Caroline Rhea being on Dancing with the Stars in the last 2 years? I feel like really spooked. Your mind plays tricks on you.

Like Sabrina.

My mind is telling— I know exactly the kind of memory you mean. This is from chat. Chat is like always patronizing me. Like, just tell me. Caroline Rhea has not been a contestant on Dancing with the Stars. There are a couple plausible reasons why your brain might create this. You may be thinking of Caroline Rhea and another competition show. No, she was original host of The Biggest Loser. That's my queen. Um, there has been some extremely Caroline Rhea adjacent contestants recently. Danielle Fishel, Wayne Hendricks.

Caroline Rhea adjacent? That's—

No, guys, I feel like I'm going nuts.

Maybe someone will know what you mean.

Please, please someone know what I mean, or like I actually need to go to the hospital. I'm having psychosis. Like, that's insane.

Well, Sabrina the Cast Reunion: The 30-Year Anniversary Live will give fans the chance to see the cast together again as they revisit the series through stories from behind the scenes favorites. So I guess they're like going on tour, but I guess it will be sort of like a—

Oh, like a Comic-Con type of thing.

It'll be a 15-stop reunion tour following their June reunion event in Chicago. It will kick off fittingly on Halloween in Beverly— Oh, cute, cute. Massachusetts, just outside Salem. Salem.

Oh, cute, cute, cute.

Salem the Cat.

Salem the Cat.

We actually watched a lot of Sabrina growing up.

So much. And you know what, I— when I think of that show, I think like really fondly and warmly. It was like a very family-friendly, nice show. We loved it. Um, and like she was that bitch with like that finger, you know, like just swirling around.

She's like always in the kitchen with her aunties, like classic Salem.

Literally, that's us.

Goals.

Literally us. Um, won't be attending, but like happy for them to continue milking, and I hope they all make lots of money because that's obviously like the point of this.

Yes, of course. And And like be inspired by the Jonas Brothers. Like it's never too late or too long to do a nostalgia tour.

I'm having déjà vu cuz I've definitely said this again, but like every now and then, cuz the Jonas Brothers go on tour like once every year, once every day when they do go on tour, like it hits my TikTok and I'm like, I gotta go. It looks so good. I saw Joe Jonas like serenading this girl and I was like, so jealous. I need to go.

I think they're here soon. Really? Yeah. Like any day now. Look it up.

Oh, I would totally go to that. Like us going to Rascal Flatts, but we will go.

And me going to Bruno Mars. I'll be there.

Jonas Brothers concert near me. I would love to go. Yeah, those days when we were broke in California. Oh, your friend?

Yeah, like we go to concerts together and we have a lot of fun together.

They are gonna be in Miami on October 5th. Oh, that's insane. Like 6 days. I don't know, that's kind of soon.

I'm cracking up because you literally said you want to go so bad, and in 6 days we can go and you don't want to go.

Yeah, what's— do you know the Kaseya Center? Is that where we went to the Ringling Brothers? I think it is. It was actually like a lovely facility. You didn't go to the Kaseya?

No, because Max was so little.

Oh my God, girl, you missed out on one of the worst shows of all time. It's such good food. All right, let's see, are tickets expensive?

The same food.

Oh my God, the food was so good. You're so right.

Well, how do you spell Kaseya?

Kaseya. K-A-S-E-Y-A. I feel like when they go on tour so much, like, the tickets really shouldn't be expensive, right?

Yeah. Yeah, we should go.

Let's go.

Okay, what— when is it?

Is it Monday? Let's get the Burnin' Up VIP lounge package.

1,000%, we need a lounge. Is it on Monday? October 5th?

October 5th is—

A Monday. That's kind of crazy.

It's not gonna work.

That's kind of crazy.

I, I can't go to a concert and then like go to work in the morning. I'm, uh, I'm 30 years old. Like—

We'll have to discuss.

We'll have to take off Tuesday. Okay.

Yeah. So do you guys want us to go or no?

Yeah, let us know. Sound off in the comments. All right.

It's up to you.

Let's dive into Dear Toasters 'cause we are past officially our 1 hour. hour mark, which means today's just gonna be an Ilafy and it's fine. Like, we knew we could do it. We believed we could.

I wasn't even watching the clock.

Oh, me neither. I never watch the clock. Today's— nope. Dear Toasters is our weekly advice segment. Every Tuesday, Jackie and I try to help out our community. You know, you guys do a lot for us. You support our show, um, and we try to give back.

Let us go to the Jonas Brothers and take off.

Yeah, um, and we try to give back. You know, I feel that a lot of you guys are probably going through stuff of your own, so write into us. We can help you. Like, it's gonna be like old Jewish mother type of of, um, advice, but that's kind of the advice some of you bitches need. So deartoasters@gmail.com, that's the email you can write in. Of course, your like name information is always anonymous. You can also, if you're extra paranoid, just go to our website, thetoastpodcast.com, and there's a submission box. You don't need to put your email or anything, but, um, they both go to the same place, so you have an equally good chance of getting on. Okay. Hey, Swirlies, I love you guys. Recently I've been seeing a younger guy. He's 1 and a half years younger than me, which is not something I would usually go for. He's extremely complimentary, very generous, kind, and I've got When we go out, he talks to every other person he meets, which can be annoying, but it's mostly endearing. The other night we went to dinner in Vegas at the Wynn. We were sitting at the bar.

He began talking to the couple next to us. They were ending their meal and their server was picking up their plates, which had the remnants, like 2 slices of a cut filet on it. My date told the waiter to give him the plate and he proceeded to finish the leftovers on the people's plates next to us. And as I watched in disgust— we have amazing chemistry and we have an amazing time together, but I actually don't think I can let this go. Do I need to ghost him? him.

You don't need to ghost him, but let's talk about the act itself.

Yeah, because obviously when I hear this, like, I would assume that this person's like on the balls of their ass. Like, this is something you only do when like you're really like at a desperate place in your life financially, like you can't afford your own meal.

But you guys are at the Wynn, like in Vegas, having like a couple's retreat.

Did he leave the room last night and like, like lose all of his money at the casino table? Because like, this is what you do when you're in distress financially. But he's But I'm getting the vibe that he's not.

This is just like a behavior of his.

Which is almost worse.

Which is crazy. You don't eat like food off the fork of a stranger's plate.

In no world is this an okay thing to do for a million reasons. Safety. What if this person had herpes? Did you use their fork? Like, it's insane. Like, it's so disgusting. And I hate to write people off because it's hard to get a boyfriend, especially you seem to have a great time together and he took you to the Wynn. Like, I don't like to write people off because like one moment, but I feel that this is a flag so red that there's almost nothing you can do.

But what does it speak to?

A mental illness. Not that we shouldn't date mentally ill people, they deserve love too, but do you wanna go on that journey?

I just think it shows a lack of decorum and understanding about how public spaces work. I think you can speak to him and be like—

Wow, really?

Yeah. If everything about him is great and he just has this one, like, like very off behavior that no one ever told him was not something that we do in polite society, then you can be the one. At least give it a shot and see if he like is receptive or so defensive.

That's so optimistic. Um, I would say let it go.

'Cause I think like it, it's probably born from just like a, you know, a communal feeling of his. He thinks these people are his friends. Now I would eat off my friends their last piece of steak. They're like talking to them at the dinner and everything. Oh, I get it.

Yes, but like, I almost feel like he's only chatting with people like to get their food.

Well, that, if you really want to look into it, maybe.

But then I would just be worried about going home to his family because this is obviously like someone who was raised wrong, and then these are going to be your in-laws. Like, I just feel like save yourself the trouble. He's fucking crazy.

I think you can talk to him because if you're gonna break up with him anyway, might as well give it a shot.

Some people can't be spoken to, honestly.

And she likes him so much. It's hard to get a guy. I can't believe you would write him off just like that.

Jackie, this is so crazy. You're not even being dramatic. If anyone in your life did you would never get over it.

I would— if— I would crack up.

Liar, liar, pants on fucking fire.

If Ben— like, if Ben did it?

If Ben did it, he would get his ass beat.

But you wouldn't like leave him?

We're married with children, and honestly, I would consider it. Like, that's insane. I think you're so underreacting to this.

I just think he doesn't know how the world works, and it's up to you to show him.

Well, unless he was seriously like Jacob Tremblay raised in a room, there's no excuse beyond being Jacob Tremblay.

Mhm.

That's it.

No, some people are just too familiar with others, and I don't think that's something that like is a complete deal breaker at this moment.

I'd love anyone in the food service industry to sound off in the comments. Like, do you guys see this a lot?

Yeah.

People really do waste like so much food.

Yeah.

And it's obviously unfortunate because like you would, but it's really for health reasons. Like, it's so unsanitary. I'm sorry, divorce, break up. Like, literally, you don't need to ghost him.

Like, you could tell him why, but I think if you're gonna break up with him, just at least try and see if he would stop it.

Find a new man. Hey, Swirlies, I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is gay. Well, you've come to the right place, but I don't know how to go about it. He does some girly things, but okay, some men are just a little more feminine. He recently asked me—

metrosexual—

wait, he recently asked me, what would you do if I was gay? I replied, I'd break up with you.

That's a weird thing.

He got really upset. He started crying and told me I was making him anxious. I obviously don't want to date a gay guy, but I also don't want to accuse him of something or make him feel ashamed of his feelings.

You didn't accuse him of anything.

I think I would feel guilty about lying or trying to make something up to get out of the relationship. Thanks. Like, you're being really considerate and you've got to go, like, for a million reasons.

Like, you already thought he was a little bit gay, and then he literally told you— he said to you, what would you do if I was gay? That's not a coincidence.

And that's— I just wanna let you know, that's not something people say. It's not like, what would you do if I grew an extra toe?

Like if I was a worm.

Yeah, right. That's not the same as what would you do if I was gay? Like, because obviously if you find out your partner's gay, like you don't stay with them because you're no longer compatible.

You're in a homosexual relationship.

So it's not like one of those typical quirky relationship questions. He basically came out to you, which is very sweet. He trusts you and you should wish him the best and move on with your life. Do not waste one more moment. And I know that you're writing to us being like, how can I untangle myself from this in such an ethical— like you're being so sweet and like considerate. it. Um, and girl, just go. Girl, just go. Save yourself. He's gay.

Yeah, I feel like people forget what the point of the relationship is, right?

It's like be in love and have sex, and like when the person's gay, that sort of just like throws a wrench in that.

We can be friends, best friends, but like the relationship purpose, yeah, sort of dissolved.

And I, I fear that you're wasting your time like even thinking about like how to politely untangle yourself from this web. Like, just go.

And it's a boyfriend.

Like, it's a boyfriend.

Walk out the door.

Just like seriously go.

Walk out the door.

You don't need to run. I don't think he's like a danger.

No, no, no.

But also, even if he's not gay, like any guy who like, when you're arguing— not even arguing, they're having a conversation— he starts crying, you're making me anxious.

Ick. Wait, you're making me anxious from a conversation that I brought up to you out of nowhere?

You literally asked me the craziest question ever.

So picky. That is ick.

1,000%.

So like, even if he wasn't gay, he's so I asked you an impossible question to answer and your response to it has made me anxious.

And your response was so honest and beautiful. Like, obviously I would break up with you.

Yeah.

I'm not the right woman for you. You should want me to break up with you if you were gay. I'd be doing you a favor, setting you off on your journey. Unique. I'm sorry that happened to you. This last one's so sick. Hey, swirlies, I need help deciding if I should confront my fiancé or not.

He's asleep. You can't just walk out the door.

Yeah, you can't just— no, like, you have roots here.

You have to set the ring down.

But you're not— You're not trapped.

And like, are you losing a deposit?

You know, does he have a lot of money? Like, there are a lot of things to consider.

Well, that could be with a boyfriend too.

He's a sweet angel of a man. He loves me so much and so well. I can't wait to marry him. But you guys are so funny. I looked through his pictures the other day, and in this hidden photo album where he only keeps my nudes was 4 pictures of his cousin in a bikini. I don't have an issue with him finding other women attractive or even watching porn, but his cousin—

You don't have to explain.

Girl, you're being like way too generous. What do I do? That is seriously disturbed.

Like, that's fucking twisted.

I think having an album of nude photos of you where any other person is in that album, like, I would be upset. But of course we're taking this to another level when it's a cousin.

No, but I was, I was prepared for like his ex's nudes are also in there and he just throws files them all to nudes and he doesn't delete them because like, yeah, some people don't delete them.

Now I am—

and I was ready to sort of adjudicate on that.

This— It's just a wrench.

Is a whole nother ball game.

Especially because when I think of like a hidden album, like I know what those photos are used for, right?

Mm-hmm.

And so is the cousin a part of that?

Claudia, stop asking the obvious questions that are—

Oh, you think that's obvious? Okay, I thought I was being like really smart.

That are just like too painful for us to think about.

Yeah, like this is a family show. I don't even know, like, if you should confront him because, like, it is— I don't think that this can be misunderstood in any way. It's not like it was like a photo of her high school graduation that accidentally ended up in the album. It's a bikini photo and this is an album of nude photos. So you have a fiancé who, like, is attracted to his cousin. That's sort of— yes, matter of fact, that's where we're at.

And isn't afraid to admit it to himself. True.

A lot of people would, like, not put it in the folder but go look at it.

No, or just, like, put it out of their mind. Okay, like, plenty of people have a hot cousin, like, but it's your cousin.

Seth Mosakowski.

Yeah, and then I was gonna ask, is it a first cousin?

Or second cousin? Because any of your cousins—

but even still, because even if it's a second cousin—

you know who's looking fine tonight? Seth Mosakowski.

That's your cousin.

Yeah, but he's my first cousin.

It's also bad if he— if it's a second or a third cousin, someone he could legally marry, because now he's looking at another woman.

Yeah, of course. But obviously the incestual element makes it worse.

This is so bad.

It's so bad. He is your fiancé. Sure, you can bring it up and like give him a chance to explain.

Like, maybe— But he's just gonna fucking lie through his teeth. What's he gonna say?

This is really gross. And I feel like when you even—

It's unsettling.

When you entertain the concept of incest into your life, even in like a sort of removed kind of way, it's a dark path that leads to other sins.

Yeah, it's sinful what he's doing. It's kind of textbook definition. It's a hotbed of moral turpentine.

And also, like, if he were to act on it, it, it's a crime as well, you know?

So— It's actually a crime that he has those photos in a private album amongst nudes. Like, I don't know, that should be a crime.

We're supposed to be giving her advice, like, we're just making her feel worse. Um, um, I really don't know how to help you because obviously I would say like, this is a deal breaker. It's a relationship ender.

Of course.

And we, we never press that button. Like, we always joke about it, but like, we really try to make things work. We try to be understanding of people, but like, there's like nothing you could understand.

So what I was gonna say is like, what if he's like actually the most perfect, perfect person? Like generous, handsome, like loving, whatever, and he just has this like one thing. But instead I'm not gonna say that. I'm gonna say this.

Well, I just wanna say, 'cause if it was that one thing, that one thing leads to other things. So it's not just like it ends with the cousin and the photo.

Instead I'm gonna say this: can you make a list of other bad things about him? Like, we need to build up the caseload for why you're going to leave him.

So I actually don't think you do need to build up the caseload. Like, I think the photo of the cousin in the hidden album is enough.

But like someone could say, you know, it's not what you think.

Well, so ask him, and if there is like, by the grace of God, like the most plausible explanation of all time, then you're fine.

No, it's so bad. Like engage and like—

I know.

I feel so bad.

Yeah, because like—

I just have to start over. So I'm just trying—

But what's worse, starting over after an engagement or finding out your husband likes his cousin? I don't know, color me, uh, naive, but I feel that, you know, you're getting out early.

Yeah.

You could have found this out while you were pregnant. So many worse alternatives. You sound like a beautiful woman.

I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

Oh, from the bottom of my heart, you have my deepest sympathies. And, um, you have to break up with him.

And it's also like almost even harder that they're engaged, because if it was a boyfriend, of course, goodbye. And if it's your husband, like, you do want to try and like work through things.

You're like, I have a choice.

But like, the, the engaged position makes it like really hard.

I know. Today we're kind of 3 for 3 for telling them to break up with their boyfriends.

Not me on number 1.

Me on all 3. And that feels good.

Really? It doesn't feel good when you have to say it. I don't like that outcome. I like working through the issues.

Now, like, the plate thing versus the cousin thing, it makes the plate thing seem like not a big deal, but it is.

No, it's not.

It is. Thank you to everybody who wrote in.

You guys— I don't know if you think the plaything is like the ultimate deal breaker. Yeah, or like something we could work through with an open and willing person.

Of course, everyone was especially vulnerable with us. We appreciate your submissions. Thank you so much for listening to The Toast, the Millennial Morning Show, where we deliver the fastest stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as podcasts anywhere podcasts can be found, so that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, Castbox, all the places where you listen to podcasts. Find us at Toasty Fuzz, where I'll be at a beautiful setting. I'm Michaela Dad, what giddily talented we are. Hope you guys have an amazing day. We'll see you tomorrow.

Love ya. Bye.