Transcript of JuJu Gotti Is In NBA 2K27?! | Postgame Show

Wo gibt's eigentlich die weißen Rosen aus Athen? Und wo regnet's für mich noch mal rote Rosen?

Natürlich im Europa Rosarium Sangerhausen mit der größten Rosensammlung der Welt. Viele tausend Rosenarten warten auf Sie mit prachtvollen Blüten und herrlichem Duft.

www.rosarium.de We have an awful lot of polls to get to today. Juju, we put him to work today. He's also got jokers of the weekend. He's got flowers. to give as well. He too, oddly, looks just like Zaslav today, which is just unbelievably strange to me, the amount of Zaz infection that is all over the place around here. Uh, Juju though has hats that are way too nice to have that shitty strap on them, so he's not quite Zaslav-ish in all of the ways. Uh, Juju, what kind of jokers do we have from the weekend? And it's good to see you. What kind of flowers do we have from the weekend as well?

Yes, sir, man. I got big-time jokers. That's the kind of jokers I got. And just like my brother Aminah Hassan, I'm a wee bit under the weather, you dig? So I'mma power through. First and foremost, Keenan Allen, welcome to Indianapolis, brother. This is not necessarily the way you might have wanted to be welcomed, but they got video of my brother coming out of the, the police station after being detained after a DUI. Look at him. Is he— is the brother still drunk? Salute to his homeboy though.

He's trying to help him.

His friend's like, oh, come on.

This guy's trying to help him, but you got Keenan Allen staggering out and the baldness is hurting him as well there.

That was like a step down out of that door, another step off. I'm gonna go with that was just an odd step there. I don't think he's still drunk.

Wait a minute, this video is so good.

He's trying to hide.

He's staying low.

Let me stay low.

Look how wide his buddy gets trying to hide from the cameraman the fact that Keenan Allen is bald.

This is a play on for me, Tony.

That guy, that guy blocking Keenan Allen's view is doing what Ron McGill says you should do in front of a bear, like get real big and get real wide.

Hey bear!

I thought it was LaVar Ball for a second. Um, he's got to come home, right?

Oh my God.

Of course. I'm talking about his letter has been in the mail for about 10 years now. Keenan, please.

They're sending it to San Diego. That's why he keeps getting them in San Diego, but obviously they're not there anymore.

So he's like, damn, I didn't get the letter. Right, the next joker I have, someone who I used to love, you know what I mean? He would never end up on this list back in the days, but Jayson Tatum took his behind to China and thought it was sweet. My boy gave NBA Twitter a meme for the rest of history. Look at my boy stroking 0% from the free throw line. He shot 10 of them, guys, 10.

10.

Missed all of them.

Is this one of those carnival hoops? You know, those hoops a little like off the angle?

No, they're a little small. Those hoops are a ripoff. Those hoops on purpose are about half the size of NBA hoops.

And stiff, by the way, too. Right, get them out of here. Get the Celtics out of here. Loser. Next one. Of course I gotta go there. Matter of fact, before I go to the one of the weekend weekend, I'm gonna go Phoenix Mercury, brothers and sisters. The Phoenix Mercury. Now, back in midseason, they traded Monique Akua-Makani, a 2027 first-round pick, a 2028 second-round pick, and all of that was just to acquire Kelsey Plum. They, they were in 12th place when they did this. They finished the season in 12th place, eliminated already before the break. And now Kelsey Plum is talking about she don't know if she's gonna stay in Phoenix because she's an unrestricted free agent. You can't make this stuff up. And last one but not least, your brother and ours, DeJuan Love, man.

DeJuana, boy.

Look at this, bro. If I would have saw this, nah, hell nah, bro. Whoever threw him that football, you a hater.

What was that throw?

Bro, love and love to all the women who fell for it, but dog, When you got— you so bad at being a fake and a scammer, real deal NFL analyst Mina Kimes took to Twitter and made a video about how your route looked like a Drewski route, big bro. Ultimate joker. Back to you, Dano.

Uh, we'll get to some polls in a second because we've got too many of them, but how about some flowers? Because everybody knows you're not a hater. Everyone knows that you're usually somebody who is spreading positivity everywhere. So who deserves the flowers this weekend?

Man, I'm gonna give some flowers to the creators and the makers and the programmers of NBA 2K27 for recognizing your boy as a journalist. Now every single person in the world that buys 2K27, I will be on the NBA side and the WNBA side providing commentary and social media updates to just explain to you what exactly is going on. Salute!

That's awesome.

Wow.

Yes.

Am I allowed to say what you and Cody were doing last Friday, or is that a secret?

Don't say that.

Nope, it's still a secret.

All right, we'll find out soon.

Exactly.

Dad tried to ruin that.

We got milestones.

My dad tried to ruin that on today's Greg Cody Show, and I had to stop him.

Uh, that was a real—

Yes, sir.

That was a real look at me, Louie, though, from Juju there, right? Like, that was a real celebration of Juju. He just gave flowers.

Yeah, but, but see, as a, as a brother though in this world, if I wait for y'all to do it, I'll be waiting forever.

That's right.

Ain't nobody reached out to me, sent me a text message, sent me a congratulatory situation, but if something go wrong, y'all will be on my line. This is awesome. I'm celebrating myself. This is really amazing. Also, also too, my brother Dan, I got some advice for you, my brother. Put these flowers down. Andre Iguodala style, brother. Uh, Googling massage near you is gonna have your ass at a penitentiary near the damn Gulf of Mexico, bit, bro. Stop doing it. Don't do it no more. Massage— get you a therapist, get you somebody who you trust, and tell them to follow you over there, or someone in the region that you trust, take their advice, because I do not want to open the newspaper, the Miami Herald, and see my brother in handcuffs. Ain't that a beef?

You'll be in front of me when I stumble out of the massage parlor.

The way Keenan Allen did.

Yeah, just spreading your arms out. Any more flowers, or is that the end of the flowers for Keenan?

Just Google massage near me.

That's it. Exactly.

Just for himself.

I'm gonna give some more, uh, flowers to Angel Reese for breaking the double-double record in the W. Most double- double-doubles in a season, in a single season, man. Come on, dog. As well as our sister Caitlin Clark, who's the first player in WNBA history with 800 points and 300 assists in a season. Come on, man. These flowers are for y'all ladies.

Uh, get those polls ready, Juju, because we have a lot of them to get to. But while we wait for you to get them ready, I just wanted to ask you, as it relates to your favorite Atlanta Dream team, that Angel Reese trade has been a great one, correct? Like that, that I don't know what that has done to Atlanta, but Atlanta seems well managed by our friend Renee Montgomery. So how do you feel about, uh, that trade and your team?

Yeah, man, I feel spectacular, dog. Like this, you could never— I couldn't imagine it actually happening. I would tell people this as a joke, oh, we gonna get Angel Reese. Well, we actually got Angel Reese, and it has turned around the economy of the Dream, let alone the city, because It sounds okay. Okay, go see the Dream someday, or come, come watch a Dream game with me, big bro. Uh, I'm gonna pull up on you. But if I say, hey dog, come see Angel Reese play with me, oh, oh, oh, where we at? Where we at? I'm, I'm pulling up. So it's done revitalized the whole city, the city's faith in the Dream basketball, and mine as well, because I thought earlier in the season some of them losses and some of those things could have been clinked up. Damn, are we gonna get to them? But with the addition of DeJuan Abonner, a legend, a veteran, I think we actually have the chance right now to make some noise in the playoffs. For real, for real.

Making some noise, as there's going to be some noise made in the playoffs.

None of that fake-ass noise either.

For real, for real. @LeBatardShow. Good, good, like McAfee's album. Uh, @LeBatardShow, uh, is where you vote on the polls. What do you got for us?

Do you get your drink taken away when you're taking off on an airplane? 59% of the audience says no, you don't.

Pat McAfee.

Ooh, I think, uh, 59% of the audience might not know ball, man, because the lady, she brings your drink while the other people are loading on, takes your order so you don't have to wait, and then when it's about to take off, she says, up, tray's up, I need these drinks back.

Yeah.

Neither here nor there.

Yeah.

Do you pack 2 pairs of drawers for each day you travel? 55% of the audience says yes, they do.

Pat McAfee.

Ah, come on, y'all. Did you know that pilots and flight attendants clean their underwear in hotel coffee machines? Before I give this poll response, I'm gonna tell you what my homegirl— I text my homegirl, she a flight attendant. So I asked her, bro, y'all be washing y'all stuff in the dang, uh, coffee machine? She says, Negro H, no. Who the hell told you that? So 87% of the audience says no, they did not know.

Pat McAfee.

Are we still making Jeds? 86% of the audience says no, we are not.

Pat McAfee. You can't see a baby emerge from the womb and say that, that boy's name is Jed. You can't do that if you want that boy to have a life that doesn't end up in a trailer park with billions of dollars looking for $140 sex.

Is Kerp Herb Street right about having your wife do a handstand upon conception to ensure that you have a boy? 58% of the audience says no, he is not.

Pat McAfee.

Is it redundant to send someone from Winnipeg to hell? 81% of the audience says yes, it is redundant.

Pat McAfee.

After all these years, should the Dave Matthews Band be called the Dave Matthews Band with Carter Buford? 79% of the audience says yes, it should.

Pat McAfee.

Did Dave Damchick imply that Tom Hanks had sex with Wilson the damn volleyball? 96% of the audience says yes, he did.

Pat McAfee.

That's a hell of a sounder. And last poll, do you miss the fat MLB baseball player? 93% of the audience says yes, they do. And those are your polls.

MLB baseball player, also redundant. Thank you, Juju. Good seeing you, buddy.

Whoops.

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Thank you.

Good night, everybody.

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