This Dan Le Batard Show local hour looks ahead to Miami's clash with Notre Dame while reviewing the weekend's college and pro football. The hosts debate the rules behind a controversial onside kick and a weather-hit game with almost no completed passes, and they discuss the Heisman race around Miami's standout player.
A large part of the conversation focuses on betting markets, which have pushed undefeated Miami to a five-and-a-half-point underdog, and listeners hear differing views on whether that line is justified. The show also runs its What Made You Laugh segment, covering sports moments from Halloween costumes to a thrilling Minnesota-Indiana game.
In this episode Dan Le Batard
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A season of chasing: one Sunday to become a champion. This Sunday, the NASCAR Cup Series Championship returns to homestead Miami Speedway, where Kyle Larson, Christopher Bell, and their fellow contenders look to finish the season on top. The pressure, the rivalries, the trophy they all want—it all comes down to South Florida for a finale you won't want to miss. After a season of battles, the sport's best have one final chance to leave their mark. Who will rise to the moment, and who will leave Miami with a trophy?
Want to add to the action? Check out DraftKings for race winner bets, head-to-head matchups, and more. Get your crew together and settle in for the season finale. Watch the NASCAR Cup Series Championship at homestead Miami this Sunday at 3:00 PM Eastern on NBC. One race to go, everything to race for.
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Tony's Halloween was pathetic.
I wouldn't say pathetic. I would say difficult.
Well, go ahead and explain to people, paint the picture for people, because I'd go pathetic and you tell me, Zaz, whether this is pathetic or difficult.
So obviously it was a muggy night, pre-massive storm that we had on Sunday. So it's you feel the atmosphere just like heavy. It's dense. I'm wearing a Sully costume, zipped up to the top, hot.
Dude, we get it. You have a kid. If this is just.
Has not.
This is what this is going to be, like.
Are you going to.
You got to get used to it, buddy.
Go ahead. I'll let you go. You're right. I jumped in too soon. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Do you want to tell the story? Go ahead.
No, go ahead.
I'm going to turn my mic off. Chris, tell my story.
If this ends up with, I got to get.
Go ahead. Go ahead. Go on. I'm done.
Go ahead.
Do you know his story, Chris?
No, but I can just.
He doesn't know shit.
With this guy? The last two years.
I want you to tell the story.
Everything you do is shadow show. I'm leaving the shadow show. Oh my God. I got a kid, dude.
I'm leaving the shadow show.
You made him storm off. You made him quit the show.
Well, I don't know what he was.
He just walked off.
I regret. I have regret. But I guarantee you this ends with him being a dad.
Had to be said.
You don't have to regret he storms off because you just made fun of him. Like, I don't understand. That's unprofessional and.
And I went way better than his story. I can tell you that. I promise you that.
So this is what happened. I'll just tell his story. He's.
You know his story.
He's dressed up for Halloween and he's in a corner of a room in a home where.
And he has a kid.
Where everyone else is dressed up for Halloween and he's in a corner just watching the UM game and no one else there cares about the UM game. And so it's one of the worst ways you can watch UM to be hot and lonely and in a costume and surrounded by people who don't care about what you're watching.
And everybody's dancing like Ugaracha and whatever. And I'm there with my brother-in-law sitting watching on our phones and the reception is bad because we couldn't find the Wi-Fi to the house. So we're sitting there watching the game. We're like, oh my God, the onside kick. Oh wait. Oh my God, the other onside kick. Oh my God, the third onside kick. And they're like, like Ugaracha, like Ugaracha.
So difficult or pathetic, Zaz. I don't know how he came back that quickly. He stormed off, quit the show, and then came back.
He never really left.
Well, he did leave. I saw him leave, but we're doing shadow show, so no one else saw him leave.
The cameras didn't get him.
They just yeah, they just think that he's been there the whole time. I saw him leave. I didn't think he was coming back. I thought he quit the show. Pathetic or difficult?
I mean, I don't know why you have a problem with it. What should he have done in your eye?
I'm not saying that there's anything to be done other than spend more time with people who care about football the way you do so that when important things are happening, you're not in a corner by yourself wearing a costume feeling pathetic.
You couldn't even get them to put it on a television. You had to watch it on your phone.
No, because here's the issue. They had the sound system on the TV. They had Spotify playing like spooky Halloween music mixed with like Spanish music. And I was like, nobody here cares. 900 people at the party. Nobody gives a rat's ass about what's happening in this spooky game at UM. We have no idea.
Geez. It's a little bit on the pathetic side.
A daughter running around. I got to catch her.
Tony, a little bit on the pathetic side.
Man, Chris had been holding on to that.
I mean.
What's his deal?
It's just everything the last.
I did.
Two years with you.
You're hold on.
Oh, I'm so tired today.
I never said anything. All I said is I'm wearing the costume because we're at a costume party. And then you fly off the hinges.
Once a week, this guy comes in wearing it.
Once a week?
Oh, man.
Like five times a week.
My kid let me get this. Let me tell you. You've never heard this story. My kid was up late last night.
A few weeks ago, I was telling you guys how to be a Tampa Bay Bucks fan and sit through a two and a half hour weather delay and then have your game decided two and a half hours later than it was supposed to, that there was no reason for any fan to go to a stadium and spend that amount of time in the rain. But the action yesterday in that game was worse than the inaction in the one a few weeks ago, where from 1:05 PM to 2:45 PM Eastern, neither team completed a pass.
If I'd given you guys betting odds on an NFL game having one team unable to complete a pass all game and winning the game, 16-0, and two teams playing an NFL game that doesn't have a completion at the beginning of November, not December or January, at the beginning of November, a weather game so bad that from 1:05 to 2:45 PM, nobody completes a pass, would you have imagined it even possible?
No. No. And I don't even understand what took place in that game yesterday. Like, it wasn't a monsoon. Like, I know the ground, it was all wet and there were puddles and everything. You can't complete at pass?
Did you watch the game? It was at monsoon.
Really? The whole I mean, I know it was raining. They played in rain.
It looked better. It looked better on television. Clearly, it affected the results. One of the things that happened in that game, I don't know, Zaz, the Atlanta Falcons have an all-pro, Jesse Bates, who's there as an all-pro simply because he peanut punches well. He's caused 11 turnovers by fumble with that punch. He's only got 14 interceptions in his career. He's a great safety. He got Bucky Irving right at the goal line because he's so good with the punching. He must be your least favorite player.
Let me reiterate something. I don't have a problem with the peanut punch. I don't have a problem with punching the football out at all. I have a problem when you miss and you punch a player. I get these messages every Sunday, every time there's a peanut punch. Zaz, though, you know about that peanut punch?
About that landman?
I know about that landman. I don't have a problem with punching the football. I have a problem with punching the player.
Fumbles are way up because of it. Like, you're asking them to change a rule that right now the punching is absolutely worth it because there are no consequences and fumbles are way up.
They're going to change it. They're going to change it, Dan. And I'm going to be the founder of it. I am. I'm going to be the founder. Everyone's going to remember me.
Founding loser.
Let's talk about better football than what it is we saw from Atlanta and Tampa yesterday because that Miami Hurricanes game was interesting for a lot of different reasons. You've got now Mensah and Tony are the DraftKings favorites, 1-2, to win the Heisman Trophy.
Malachi.
So they are 1-2. Malachi has tied the season record for touchdowns in a season for the University of Miami. Mensah doesn't turn the ball over. It's crazy to me that the University of Miami doesn't turn the ball over. And they are an elite offense. But I didn't think that before Notre Dame, there was any team on the schedule that had the quarterback-coach combination that could undress the University of Miami.
But Petrino and Belichick coached the perfect game. Belichick had a chance to erase almost all of the nonsense that he has brought North Carolina's way by being the coach who won against a number one opponent for the first time in North Carolina history. North Carolina never wins that game. That game was perfectly coached by North Carolina. I've watched North Carolina all year. They're terrible at offense. Not mediocre.
Terrible. And they looked like an elite offense. The last two weeks, the University of Miami has given up 700 passing yards and eight touchdowns. What do you think CJ Carr is going to do against that? You're going to have to win a shootout against Notre Dame. There's no other way. That's the first time Belichick's ever scored 35 points in a game and lost. First time it's ever happened to him. He's never scored 35 in a game and lost the game. And what your assessment has to be at the end of it, given what college football is, is tough to win conference road games.
You take them however it is you can get them. A lot of people don't know the onside kick rules because this is going to be viewed as another controversial Miami getting calls at the end. And the two were obvious. Did you guys know before Saturday that when you're kicking off on an onside kick, that basically that's like the neutral zone? It's not the goal line. It's not your feet that have to be behind it. It's your entire body has to be behind the kicker. So that was the first onside kick that got returned. And then the other one was more egregious. You cannot hit a guy before he's had a chance to catch the ball.
It's just simply illegal. You got to give him a chance to catch the ball.
And so with that said, and look, it's incredible, I guess, good fortune that two weeks in a row, the Canes made it through two Hail Marys because one of them was a penalty that they called back and the other one they called an interception. I think both were rightfully so. And then this week, the two onside kicks, one offside and the other one illegal touching and illegal blocking. So there's been some good fortune that the Canes have had the last couple of weeks.
But I don't understand the complaining at the end of the game from people like, you can't make that call if you're the officials. This is the worst call I've ever seen at the end of the game. Hold on a second. How can the worst call you ever seen be applying the rules of the game and calling it?
Because in desperate situations at the end, they never call pass interference on the Hail Marys. And I think at the end of games, people want the onside kick, a hope to be recovered, just no matter who it's against. Did you guys see what the numbers are on this? Because this part's interesting. In college football, 18% of the onside kicks this year have been recovered by the kicking team.
Pretty high.
But in the NFL, zero. The number is zero. It's 0%. Not an onside kick has been recovered in the NFL. I would have enjoyed the content, but not the result of a whole lot of people arguing if that had not been called, if they had allowed one of the onside kicks to be recovered. Do any of us have any doubts that if they had recovered either one of those onside kicks, they were then going to win the game, that North Carolina was absolutely going to run down the field on the University of Miami defense?
Miami scored on six of its seven possessions. That's exactly the way that you beat them. That is exactly how they will lose to a lesser team if they lose to a lesser team, where they hold your possessions down and they just sit there and grab 11 yards with every three downs that they have and just hold the ball all game. That's precisely the way to beat them if you're under man.
Why did UNC do the onside kick in the middle of the field, get them both, and then kick it to the side the third time? Why'd they do that?
Because by then, we were on their tendency.
Well, they threw Tony out there in the middle. And Belichick just said, I'm not kicking it to Tony.
I think one of the things that was kind of overlooked by the third attempt was like, even if they got it, they're inside their 15.
Yeah.
I enjoyed the part that I enjoyed is that Malachi Tony had to go get a Fugazi uniform in order to have the.
Big jersey.
He had to go. He was in his dad's clothes out there. And Belichick's kicking away from him. I've got a funny question for you guys, a legitimately funny question. If I tell Belichick before the game, hey, you're going to slow Tony down. It's going to be seven catches for 75 yards and two touchdowns. Does he take it? Because I think he does.
Yes. He does. And that's.
That's crazy.
That's always been the thing about Bill Belichick. And I think even though Malachi Tony probably helped his Heisman case, by the way, slight adjustment on the marketplace here at DraftKings Sportsbook. Jeremiah is now just slightly ahead of Malachi Tony, but he took away the best player. That's what Bill Belichick does. Bobby Petrino, another Ghost of Christmas pass, haunting Miami, getting eight yards every first down. You'd rather give up 10 because Miami played right into this tempo thing. You knew that Bill Belichick would try to limit possessions, and he did. But Miami didn't have a negative play. The offensive line pass blocking had its best performance of the season.
Mensah was incredible. You mentioned North Carolina doesn't win that game. Dude, in the 21st century, Miami doesn't win that game. Carson Beck loses that game. Cain Ward loses that game because Miami had to be damn near perfect on every snap because that's how well UNC played. And Mensah rose to the occasion.
Am I the only one who thinks the last two weeks, close victory against not a good FSU team?
Well, there was pit sandwiched in the middle.
Okay. Close victory against North Carolina. Who was game? Am I the only one who thinks that those two out of three weeks is a good thing for the Hurricanes going into this week in South Bend? Like, all we were talking about all year long was the Canes are going to kick the crap out of teams. They're not going to be tested. Okay. Well, like, they were tested in these two games. They were in tight situations late. And now you know they're going to be dialed in all week, finally getting ready for the game we've been waiting for all season. This was a good thing to me.
Miami wins the big games. It loses games like the one it just played.
And it survived it just now. Look, I'm sick of making every quarterback look good. Experienced quarterbacks in particular have been really punishing Miami, taking advantage of their aggressiveness. If you want to look for signs of encouragement, and it's hard to do that. I mean, North Carolina fans wanted Billy Edwards benched before that game. But we were worried about the deep passing game. We still have that concern. But the corners outside played really well. Their leading wide receiver had 57 yards, and he did that when Miami was up 10 and already had the game kind of decided.
The linebackers got picked apart. The safeties got picked apart. That needs to be better. We know that there's going to be a different type of defense because they lost Mezador and Bane. But I would venture to say they missed Jacoby Thomas and Keontae Scott Moore. There were a lot of times Miami got into that backfield, and they were missing the first tackle. And something's going on with the tackling. I know Xavier Lucas is working his way back from injury. He's tackling like he doesn't want to get hurt. For me, the biggest issue is the tackling now.
Okay. So one of the things that we argued about a couple of weeks ago, where I'm saying to you before the FSU game, I'm afraid of Deuce Robinson. I'm afraid of 6-6 receiver against a depleted secondary. They're about to play the best offense they've seen. And I know how good Wake Forest looks and has been. But Notre Dame as a scoring offense has been better than Wake Forest. And if you're not watching Wake Forest, Wake Forest is dominating everybody.
I think CJ Carr is a better quarterback than Gio Lopez, as much as it hurts me to say that because I've got biases for a Lopez. But I do worry about Miami's defense in this game because of the following. I don't know if you guys have been watching North Carolina. Bad offense. Not average. Bad. Do me a favor, Chris. Look up for me the offensive rankings, both in the conference and nationally for the North Carolina offense because I could not believe how good they looked.
Bobby Petrino, Bobby Petrino was back in the game. Those are professional. Those are obviously professional coaches, and Belichick and Petrino. Last time any of us remember seeing Petrino, even though he's bounced around all over the place because he can make offense, is in a neck brace wearing his affair and his motorcycle scratches on his face because Bobby Petrino is foul in many ways, but he can coach offense. And that was a clinic on Saturday on how to play a team that is better than you when you're under man and how it is that you can control the game.
They deserve to win the game. Miami made the play it had to make because they got a turnover. And quiet as it's kept, I don't think people know this nationally. Miami doesn't turn the ball over. Like, if they lose, maybe it'll be because of turnovers, but they haven't had turnovers all season. They don't turn the ball over, period.
There was no negative plays on offense. They did not get a stop or a tackle for loss. No turnovers. They were incredible. To your Notre Dame point, Notre Dame's offense has really lacked explosiveness this year. They're in the 90s. I don't think they're the best offense. They might be the most talented CJ Carr.
Just scoring offense. I'm just doing scoring offense.
And they were up 14-13 at half against Navy, and they don't really play anybody. However, here's the concern. When you play Miami, you then look explosive. Miami has made these last few offenses look really good, even though they're ranked close to Notre Dame. But headed into this game, I do think that Miami has held a lot back, both defensively and offensively in their playbook.
Like specifically for this moment?
Yes. Yes.
The season is this is as big a game has been played in a regular season for the University of Miami in 25 years.
It's the biggest game of the college football season, right?
What's interesting, though, it doesn't really matter for Miami in terms of getting to Charlotte. Quiet as it's kept, like, there was a huge result with SMU losing to Syracuse. Miami basically punched their ticket to Charlotte because everybody in that conference outside of Wake Forest, in which they had the head-to-head over, has two losses now. And they just finished their road conference schedule perfect.
So it's bigger for Notre Dame, the game.
There's always one game on the schedule that makes you start doing dangerous math. How long is a flight? Can I get back before work? Is this a terrible financial decision or a memory I'll have forever? Week nine gives us plenty of temptation. Bengals-Falcons from Madrid, Giants-Eagles, Raiders-49ers, Packers-Patriots, Buccaneers-Bears on Sunday night, and Bills-Vikings on Monday night. That's a good one. When I start talking myself into a trip, I check game time. It's easy to find tickets. And the panoramic sea views let me see exactly what I'm buying.
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A season of chasing. One Sunday to become a champion. This Sunday, the NASCAR Cup Series Championship returns to homestead Miami Speedway, where Kyle Larson, Christopher Bell, and their fellow contenders look to finish the season on top. The pressure, the rivalries, the trophy they all want. It all comes down to South Florida for a finale you won't want to miss. After a season of battles, the sport's best have one final chance to leave their mark. Who will rise to the moment and who will leave Miami with a trophy?
Want to add to the action? Check out DraftKings for race winner bets, head-to-head matchups, and more. Get your crew together and settle in for the season finale. Watch the NASCAR Cup Series Championship at homestead Miami this Sunday at 3:00 p.m. Eastern on NBC. One race to go. Everything to race for. The holidays should be about the people you love. Not mandatory work parties where I pretend to care about someone's kitchen renovation. Now's the time for those unexpected holiday side quests and enjoying a great-tasting light beer.
Last year, mine was my cousin's garage, a Miller Lite, and a four-hour debate over the best Christmas movie. Dan would make it a segment, then argue the other side on purpose. Best night of the season. Tis Miller time! In that garage, I felt great. I took a sip. I looked around and thought, yeah, this was the right call. Miller Lite is a taste you know you can depend on. Brewed for taste. It just hits different. The original light beer since 1975 and still iconic more than 50 years later. Miller Lite is great taste done right.
Go to millerlite.com/dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tis Miller time! Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.
Dan Le Batard.
Yo, I'm not going to lie.
Jonathan Sassolo.
I look good in red.
This is the Dan Le Batard Show.
I have some funniest thing nominees from that SMU-Syracuse game. I cannot believe Rhett Lashley lost to Fran Brown. Fran Brown, all he does is get penalized all game. Like, his entire career is just penalties. They have to have more penalties than any team in the sport. But I want to do funniest thing from the sports weekend because I have two of them from that SMU-Syracuse game.
Hey, people. Tell us what in the sport made you laugh hardest this weekend. It is a segment we call What Made You Laugh This Weekend.
Turns out Syracuse is second in the country in offensive penalties per game behind only Liberty.
Offensive penalties per game.
Offensive penalties.
But how about offensive penalties? Because I believe that they are number one.
They're number one, yeah.
Fran Brown, who will not shower if they lose, I believe they are number one in offensive penalties. Before we get to funniest thing, Chris, give me some North Carolina offense rankings because I was alarmed, Zaz, was alarmed that Edwards looked that way against Miami because that has not been a good offense.
Out of 138 possible teams, in yards per game, UNC ranks 107. In points per game, they rank 89th, compared to Notre Dame, who ranks 24th in yards per game and 6th in points per game.
I know Miami's defense was poor, but Edwards had one hell of a game. Like, there were certain throws that you can't do anything. That one to Thurman in the back of the end zone over three defenders, you're like, holy cow, he's having the game of his life. Thank God we can custom.
But wasn't that McIlroy who told you exactly what that play was going to be before it happened?
Brother, cover two. I don't know what we were doing. There's a lot. That's why I came away a little bit more encouraged because the history of Miami suggests, especially in that stadium, we never win that, but we were just doing dumb things.
But McIlroy said before that call, this is where they're going to throw it to the tight end.
You counted the safeties.
You just counted the safeties.
What up?
Chris, I got to imagine that North Carolina on offense is bottom of the conference, that everyone in the ACC is.
11th in offense.
So what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend, Zaz?
Well, last night, the Los Angeles Lakers got back in the win calm, Dan. I don't know if you saw. And with about two minutes left in the game, the Lakers were up by 15. And so the human victory cigar, Bronny James, entered the game. And he lasted one minute. He was a minus 11. They had to put the starters back in as the lead was cut to four. One minute, minus 11 last night for Bronny James.
Put on the poll at Le Batard Show. Is it possible to be minus 11 in one minute of NBA basketball? Yes or no. Roy, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?
What Jonathan Sassolo did to me on Friday.
Oh my God. I don't know what you're talking about.
We have the video of what he did on Friday. Please play it.
The $8.95 fried chicken at Joe's Stone Crab is no more. It's no more. It's stunning how affordable and great and large the portion is at $8.95.
Look how crispy and flaky.
It's so good. And based on rising costs in the restaurant industry. They're not getting rid of the fried chicken, Roy. Don't worry, all right? Tony, don't get worried. They're not getting rid of the fried chicken.
I was a little worried. When you brought this up, I was worried.
I realized how that sounded when I went to Roy first there. That's why I made sure to include Tony. That was not good.
Not the king's birthday and June 10th. And Quantum.
I'm looking right at Roy, so he was the first person I said. That's why I included Tony.
That's a play on for me. Go ahead.
Is it?
Yeah. I'm trying to help my guy out.
Okay.
Let the man drown? Come on.
Don't.
Could have said anyone else's name.
That's true. And that's why I immediately followed up with Tony.
Chris is right there.
Chris, you too.
Fried chicken.
Don't worry, Chris. They're not giving up the fried chicken.
Oh my God.
That's insane.
That is an error.
That's bad.
Let's not harp on it.
I don't think anyone noticed.
Cackling Damashek is a bad teammate. Look at him frozen. Go ahead and freeze him on the screen there and just put that up. Look at that. Cackling Damashek laughing at racism. Look at how he laughs at racism there. Just guffawing.
It's a bad teammate. Yeah, we were great teammates. Damashek was bad.
Jeremy, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?
Victor Wembanyama really likes Halloween. He wore several costumes. And the last look that he had as he walked into the stadium is truly remarkable.
Oh, I like it.
Right after this, he has long hair and drops the cape, walks in. That's a seven-foot-four tall man doing that with a giant sword.
I feel like you get one costume for work.
Three costumes.
You're doing too much.
The sword is long, but it looks like it's a miniature.
It looks so tidy.
Child.
It's probably six feet tall.
Sword because he's seven-foot-four. Chris, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?
Staying in the Halloween theme, we have a Dan Le Batard of the day here. We have Buddha Baker from the Arizona Cardinals being asked, while dressed in a full costume, some serious, serious questions about the trade rumors.
Buddha, I know you talked about this a little bit earlier in the week, but obviously, as we near the trade deadline, your name seems to be a name that pops up here and there on speculation. Kind of how do you look at that? How do you think about all that stuff?
Yeah, I just live in the present. Like today, having a great time with you guys. And going to have a great Friday practice and just focus on playing against the Dallas Cowboys and trying to get a W at their stadium.
That game, Arizona has never lost at that stadium. They're five and oh at that stadium. And the announcers screaming before Minshoo did Minshoo things. They're shouting, "Minshoo magic is never dead." It's just dormant for a while. Mike, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?
Thrilling game between Minnesota and Indiana. By the way, quick update on DraftKings Sportsbook. Official odds have ballooned up to five and a half. This was a spread that was three and a half between Miami and Notre Dame last week, entering all the acts.
It's because of what Edwards did to them.
It's because, yeah, it's a spot and people are thinking that Miami is due for a loss here. So five and a half on Miami-Notre Dame, according to DraftKings Sportsbook. But the thrilling game, there were several, but Minnesota-Indiana.
So good.
I'm sure Zaz loved back-to-back 60-yard field goals in college of all plays, sis. But PJ Fleck, unflappable. Check this out. He's walking down the sideline, gets popped in the face like nothing. Like nothing.
By a leprechaun?
He got hit in the face by a leprechaun.
No, no, no. That's an offensive coach. You know he got to have the guy in green and a red, different colors to the opposing defense off. But unflappable. Just kept moving on. Sunglasses at night too. I hate that it's four o'clock and dark outside. What, for farmers?
Is that the guy that holds up a sign of SpongeBob and it means something defensively?
Tony, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?
Dan, yesterday, Trey McBride had to sun Caleb Downs. Let's see if you can play. Caught a ball on an out route that beat Caleb Downs, and he had this to say.
First-round pick. You a first-rounder? For what?
For what?
First-round pick.
Wow.
It was a tough game for Caleb Downs, who I think is awesome. But he got trucked too by an offensive lineman. That was brutal.
Twice.
Yeah. On the same play.
Man, you should know in that stadium.
If you had only one game to pick from the weekend, I think I might take Minnesota-Indiana. If you had only one, but that Arizona-Dallas game was tremendous for a lot of different reasons. If you had to pick just one game from the weekend, the Miami-UNC game was great.
It was an excellent game. Well played by both teams.
KC Denver yesterday was so good.
Cincinnati-Tennessee, Dan?
Oh, I've got a lot. I've got a lot.
Cam, you were so close. You can't take that sack, Cam.
It was right there.
And also, why is Tony Pollard, Ledanian, and Tomlinson all of a sudden?
Dexter Lawrence, what a guy.
That's sack.
I have a ton from that Arizona-Dallas game, including you've arrived at some special purgatory, okay? Atlanta's on its third-string quarterback, and Baltimore's on its third-string quarterback. But when Gunner Helm is in the end zone doing the Michael Jordan shrug because he can't be stopped against Cincinnati, when it's Gunner Helm doing the Michael Jordan shrug in the end zone. So I've got funniest things, two nominees from the SMU game. First was an SMU wide receiver, gets up all excited, signals first down after an 11-yard catch.
It was still third and nine. So he signals first down. I guess he didn't know that they needed 20 yards. But that second, okay? My favorite part of the SMU game, and just what a dystopian place college football has become in the last five years, the announcer introduced us to Marcus White from SMU, who is a 25-year-old eighth-year senior on his fourth college. It's like, what are we doing?
That entire defensive line, the youngest one is in his sixth year. They call their defensive line the unks.
I thought you were going to say his youngest one was in his 60s. Is what I thought you were going to say.
It's crazy how old that lady is.
He loves education. 25-year-old in his eighth year on his fourth college. Do you guys remember in the shadows, so few people are going to remember this. We were doing bits during the pandemic on ESPN where we were doing in the shadows a bunch of satire with fake characters. And one of them was Adam McKay playing a character called Tim Jurns, who was just going around all of America playing football with a ragtag band of mercenaries who couldn't get into the NFL.
But now SMU is the home for all of them. You don't have to have just games that you're having in Walmart parking lots on a Wednesday afternoon. SMU will harbor all of your old-timey players, including the 25-year-old eighth-year senior who is on his fourth college.
Dan Le Batard.
I've never stepped foot on that campus. If you told me right now your life depends on it, go to Santa Fe University and just take a picture.
Jonathan Sassolo.
I would die. I don't know where it is.
This is the Dan Le Batard Show.
Getting back, though, to what the University of Miami did. You guys are all in agreement that if I go up to Belichick before the game, because you just said he took away Malachy Tony. Malachy Tony had two touchdowns, had incredible catches, got one overturned. That guy's hands are crazy. That guy makes every catch. And when a UM receiver drops a ball in the end zone, you assume that Malachy Tony would have made the catch because he makes all of the catches. You guys think Bill Belichick takes seven catches for 75 yards and two touchdowns before the game if he's "holding" Malachy Tony to just two touchdowns, which is, by the way, above his average, right?
He's got 13 touchdowns on the season. It's already tied for the single season record. Two touchdown catches, you're saying, yes, Bill Belichick takes that before the game because he doesn't get to 150 yards.
It's only seven catches, so it's not a crazy number. And it's 10 yards per reception, which means, all right, theoretically, he's not making big plays.
Those numbers are usually him at the half, right? Seven for 75 is a decent half. Sometimes a good half is 10 for 100. If you minimize his ability to move the chains constantly, that's where he would probably take the win. I still think Malachy Tony is the hizman, but for me, the single biggest difference in that game versus Miami's history in the last 20 years was Darian Mensah.
Absolutely.
And the ball that he threw to Upshaw, Upshaw just can't have time to think about a ball. Otherwise, it's going to be a drop. You just got to catch him in rhythm. But Mensah was unfricking real.
So what do you do if you're Miami? Because usually, you got the two guys. The school really needs to essentially put their efforts behind one. You need to push your hizman candidate. You can't really push two. So what do you do there?
They are pushing two. They're doing their best. There were Mensah for hizman signs at college game day. That seemed like a covert school marketing operation. They're doing their best right now. I think that presently, there's a real good shot that this is going to be a conversation. Who actually gets a hizman in a world where that's usually a quarterback award? It's going to be hard to deprogram people from that.
They're going to end up splitting the vote in a way that harms the both of them. That seems inevitable. But something else about Malachy Tony.
Malachy.
That I want to get into with you guys that makes him just unbelievably unique as a Miami player or a college football player. I remember Jeremy Shockey one time gets to campus and he sees DJ Williams for the first time. And he says he wants to go home. And he was transferring, right? He was a JUCO transfer. And he sees DJ Williams. Miami's only had a couple of guys like this. It's Andre Johnson. It's Alonzo Highsmith. It might be Jesse Armstead, who was like the number one recruit in the country.
And it was DJ Williams. A guy who dominates college before he's of age to be an actual man. Malachy Tony's career starts when he's 17 years old. The fact that he's this kind of dominant at this age and isn't allowed by the rules between the cartels to go pro, even though everyone watching this can see that's somebody who can play in the NFL next season. They're protecting him from himself. They're protecting his body and his body type from the 350-pounders that move faster in the pros.
But Miami hasn't had a bunch of guys like this that can dominate when they're still babies. And the other guys I just mentioned, physically, were impressive to Jeremy Shockey. They didn't look like Malachy Tony looked.
Malachy.
So it's an exciting week for the University of Miami. It's a game ultimately that does not matter for the University of Miami. It might be the biggest game of the season, and it might be the biggest game in 25 years, but they can lose it without it mattering in any meaningful way in a season where it seems obvious that everyone is flawed and that no team you look at is unbeatable. And the example is just what's happened to Miami against North Carolina FSU. One turnover in either of those games by the Miami offense, and they lose either of those games.
And impeccable elite offense is what they're getting because they don't turn the ball over. It's one thing to be dominant on offense because we've gotten this right about the University of Miami since the season started. They're going to put up 35 in every game. They're not a stoppable force on offense. They're going to score six of seven times on North Carolina because they're that good. When Mensah throws the interception in the end zone, you're confused by it. But the fact that they don't turn the ball over at all, the fact that they don't fumble, never mind interceptions. I understand why they don't have interceptions.
The quarterback might be the best in the country is why they don't have interceptions. But not fumbling, not having any turnovers, they lose that game. That game was decided at North Carolina because the Miami defense got a turnover. They forced Edwards into losing the ball in his backfield.
Well, when you mentioned they don't fumble, there were a lot of people complaining about Mario not taking a knee at the end of that game. Now, mathematically, he had it right. Taking a knee doesn't quite get you there. He wanted to manipulate the clock to completely avoid UNC having it. And that's why you had the delayed knee. But I think people took exception to Miami actually running the ball as opposed to running it backwards, especially with the yardage that they gained on the on-side and not just taking those negatives. There's different ways to go about wasting time.
Are you in agreement with me? Because this might sound like I'm being negative when I don't intend to be. They're not an elite team. They're an elite offense.
Compared to what? Yes, right now their defensive numbers suggest that that is not title-winning good historically. You need to be top 20 in both. So the defense needs to get cleaned up flatly. They are not winning a national title if they don't clean up that defense some. I think they will, though. This is just college football now. It's compared to what, Dan? That's what the best in the nation looks like.
When you say compared to what, I say it's very rare for me to look up and have this deep in the season, a number one team going on the road and being a five-and-a-half-point underdog. Unless you're going into Alabama against one of those Alabama teams of yours, I think it's very rare for somebody that the money believes is an elite team to be undefeated, to be number one, and to have the point spread climbing in the wrong direction because everybody's betting Notre Dame.
Yeah. I think people are watching those prominent games. This was an ABC game that was close throughout. And I think they're realizing in college football, you're good to get sniped. And I do think that it is common. You're going to see that. The outlier is that Miami's actually undefeated.
But when you say compared to what, I would say compared to what you're used to Miami looking like when they are consensus number one, where everyone in the country looks at them and says that's the best team in the country, it's going to be hard for anybody to beat them. I think the North Carolina and the FSU games, I mean, FSU just fired Norval.
Yeah, but Dan, they're still going to say that. It's not going to be easy to beat Miami. No one's going to make it look easy to beat Miami.
Mike, all I'm saying is number one team going on the road, I have very few examples this deep into a season, not a preseason number one, when you've seen the games played and Miami's won all of them. And now they go on the road and they're a five-and-a-half-point dog. It's just not something you see very often.
Before the season, this line was at seven and a half. It moved down to three and a half last week. And now we're splitting the difference at five and a half. It's a big game. Miami shows up for those under Mario Crispall.
Is it a big game if it doesn't matter that Miami loses it?
Well, I think it does matter, though, in terms of the buy.
I think it matters.
It matters in terms of the buy and the seeding. The number one seed gets, I think the rule is, can you look this up? Right now, if you look at the bracket, number one seed goes to the Rose Bowl, but I think you actually get to call your shot. Number one seed gets to pick geographically the closest bowl that they want. So all this stuff does matter.
Third week in a row, Miami gives up more than 400 yards of offense on defense against teams that are not nearly as good at offense as Notre Dame is. Third week in a row. It's not the Cam Ward defense, but three weeks in a row, 400 yards against Pitt, North Carolina, and Florida State is alarming. It's a siren sounding. The reason the money's going in the other direction is because they expect Miami to not be able to stop Notre Dame at all.
What's three minutes for?
What's the total in that game? What is the betting total? Because I assume offense is going to be what it is that's at a premium. Miami and Notre Dame are the first and second-ranked offenses in the country. Notre Dame has the eighth best defense. The Hurricanes are 23rd best, which is surprising given the last three weeks, but it speaks to the weaknesses of those schedules. I will remind you guys again, Notre Dame has not won a game against a top 15 opponent since 2023.
They do not win this game. This game, Notre Dame has lost. We've been talking a lot about Notre Dame the last three years. They never win this game, and they're favored by five and a half points to win it.
I have an example that's very similar in terms of the spread with the number one on the road. November 9th, 2019, number one LSU went to Alabama, and they won that game 46-41. They had been a five-point underdog to Tua and the Alabama Crispall.
So Alabama, because of the history that listen to the comparative history that I just gave you. Alabama, Notre Dame hasn't beaten a top 15 team since 2023.
In the regular season, yeah.
That's telling you what the money thinks. The money does not believe that Miami is a complete team. The money does not believe the money believes that college football is going to college football when Miami goes to Notre Dame. That's what the money is believing because the point spread is climbing and because you just saw what Belichick and Petrino did to Miami with a bad offense. I'm going to keep saying it because it's not even a mediocre offense. It's a dreadful offense that just did that to Miami.
Safety's been getting picked on. But I'm going to choose optimism here. The homer in me. I think that they cleaned up some stuff on the outside in terms of past defense. Everyone knows what the issues are. Notre Dame enters this game with some pretty big injuries too defensively. I'm excited about it. And you mentioned the public money. They've been wrong a lot this season.
You say, though, that the hizman campaign is going to be split and who's the school going to get behind, etc. I assure you that there will be a pass thrown by Malachy Tony in this Notre Dame game because his coach is going to get behind Malachy Tony. They're going to try and get him a punt return touchdown in this game or a thrown touchdown in this game so that he can reveal to the nation, "Hey, I'm the best player in the country. I'm a special kind of electricity." I assure you they're going to use him in an assortment of ways that are meant to catch people's attention.
For the game-winning touchdown in the final minutes.
Look, Notre Dame struggled against North Carolina too. That game was to be had. And for all the Miami discourse, that was a Notre Dame team that was up one on Navy at halftime.
You putting it down as a prediction? The last play of the game is going to be hit.
What a balls call that would be. They're not getting rid of the fried chicken, Roy. Don't worry, all right?
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"The difference is Darian Mensah."
Tony has a kid, and Toney is the man.
Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony.
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