Transcript of Giggling about road rage, screenshots, and brooches New

What's up, gigglers? Gary, fix your WiFi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

I mean, the day just got away from me.

What up, my glacial gigglers? It's the middle of the winter. We're on the grind, but the sun is starting to come up a little earlier.

What a mental health moment for the day.

I don't know. I don't wake up in the morning, but if I did, I heard the sun does wake up.

This morning, Hannah and I did a Zoom together. Hannah slept on it. Hannah's eyes were closed.

At one point, Grace- There was no adult on the Zoom. It was me, you, and Grace, and everyone was- We were discussing adult things.

We were. Hannah had one eye open.

Wait, it takes me a full 2 hours for both eyes to open in the morning. I had a little crusty.

Can I start the pot with something?

Yeah, I love when you start with a- I got an email. Aggressive take. Oh, an email? I know you read emails.

You think first-party food delivery data, GoPuff determined that Kinder Bueno was the biggest winner amongst the consumer packaged goods brands that advertised during the Super Bowl. The chocolate bar maker saw 100% increase in units sold through GoPuff in the hour after its Yes, Bueno ad aird, per the report. It also achieved 444% higher all day sales compared to the past five Sundays, the food delivery service says. I was not prepared to make a speech of acceptance. Let me just look into the camera really quickly. First and foremost, I'd like to thank my haters, specifically all my ex-boyfriends. One said that I'd never have a career, but I would like to have the data show that I am better than you guys. I knew it. My mom knew it.

And now you know it. And men love data. Men love data.

Men love a graph.

Put it in a spreadsheet, send it to them. I would like to call it the page disurbo effect. And I never thought that candy would be one of the things that- See, I did.

You do love a snack. I love a snack. And I'm a chocolate person over a sour candy. I don't want Kinder to get mad at me for this, but for people who haven't had it before, it truly is just a better version of a Kit Kat.

Well, it's funny. I sent it to my brother and his family, and my brother loved it.

They're so good.

Let's be honest. It's European.

They also have a white chocolate, which people sleep on white chocolate, and it's actually really good. I prefer the milk chocolate, but to each their own.

So basically, it was your Super Bowl.

Basically, I'm the Candy Queen.

Do you want to tell us anything more about the actual shoot? Because I remember you had to go international for it.

I had to go international.

You were in space.

We filmed in Canada, and at one point, they did want me to wear glasses, and I was like, Okay, but people aren't going to know that it's me. So you stood up for yourself. Well, I didn't. I told someone to tell someone like, Hey, maybe we do a couple without the glasses, and they were like, Okay, great. And then the guy that I did it with, his name is William Fichner. Shakespeare. I didn't know what to say to him, but I know him from obviously so many different acting things. But I said to him, I loved you in Entourage. It was like, you're one of my favorite characters the season you were on. And he was like, What was my character again?

Obsessed with him. And I was like- He's like, I don't know her.

I love you. I'm like, you're so accomplished. You're so Accomplished, you're like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That hit number one show that I was on. He was on Entourage. He was one of the agents at one point. His name was Phil Yagoda.

Did he give you any acting advice?

No, he didn't, but he was so friendly and so nice. And there was part of me that I was like, You're a really accomplished actor. I wonder if you're like, Who is this random girl? But he was so pleasant.

We meet famous people.

And also like, smash. He's older. He was older and you would have loved him.

Loved. No, I know. And especially he had a headset on. Boss people around. Yeah.

And he was just like, he's really getting into the role. You would be amazed at how many times you have to say one line.

I have to say I heard that one line is actually harder than a movie.

When you just have- And I believe that.

And that's a fact.

As someone who's delivered a lot of one lines, it's fucking hard.

You are the one-liner king. I've been doing some auditioning, not to brag. No callbacks yet, but keep an eye out. I'm just working through some early stages of my career. Basically, they say when you have an audition with one line, you overthink how to say that one line to the point that you're like, How did I ever say this word before? It's like when you have one interaction with a crush, and in that moment, you're like, That's not a sentence.

I said, Hi, so fucking weird.

I literally spoke like Yoda. I was like, You are, hello, my name.

Whenever I film a commercial, it It gives me such an appreciation for... When you're watching the Oscars and they're like, Okay, and best award for production, and you're like, Boo, next. But then when you film something like that, especially a 30-second, one-minute commercial, you're like, How the fuck do they actually film movies?

Do a movie. So literally eight lines could take eight hours to shoot from every angle.

I think of a one minute commercial. I was in one section of it, and I was a full day shoot. Yeah, I think I got there 6: 00 AM. What was your motive? It was my character.

Yeah, what did you envision?

She was nervous, and she was like, I'm a woman in... I was a true woman in stem. She was a woman in stem. I was a rocket scientist. Yeah.

Which makes sense. They were like, Who should we cast for Rocket Scientist? Pediasorbo. How about that girl that's always in bed?

I just really tried to get into that role of like, Oh, no, this isn't good. There has been so many times in my life where I've said, Oh, no, this isn't good.

So you channeled from your past. Yeah, I channeled from my past trauma. Honestly, it really came out in the performance. I feel like I'm the first to make fun of you when you do something bad. You nailed the acting. Thank you. You nailed the acting. I don't know, maybe there's more acting in your future. Maybe. Maybe. Well, I'll be auditioning on the side if anyone.

And one last thing about the Super Bowl, because I'm actually like, I just continued-We're not over yet. I'm not over, and I continue to get more and more mad when I go on the internet. Take the Super Bowl Go out of it. Traveling and immersing yourself in other cultures, going other places is the number one way people get smarter.

And grow in general as people.

That and reading books is how- Page reads one book.

Sorry.

And welcome to my Book Club 8. I actually have a lot to talk about my Book Club. I'm not getting it because it's like, why wouldn't you want your child to watch a Super Bowl halftime in a different language and have... Even if one child was like, Oh, I really want to learn Spanish. And now you have a smart child.

Duolingo sales sparked after that. I mean, I'm sure. But yeah, what makes America so beautiful is all the cultures coming together and creating what we are. And the American dream is coming from nothing and trying to become something. So anyway. Also, shout out, Jessica Alba.

44.

I saw it and I go, That looks like a young Jessica Alba.

It looked AI, Jessica Alba.

I said, That girl is identical to Jessica Alba from 30 years ago. And then they go, Yes, it's Jessica Alba. You know, I Everyone saw her at a bodega. Really? She was picking out a drink, which is so fun at a bodega. There's so many different drinks that she's from.

Do you think at any point, Jennifer Lopez was like, Mm-hmm.

No, Jennifer Lopez is not going to La Casita. She's like, I'm either running the casita, I'm not going to just be in the background of a casita.

Well, you know what I also realized, which I had completely forgot about when JLo and Shaqira did the halftime show, they brought Bad Bunny out.

Bad Bunny has been there.

I completely forgot because he must have just... Well, yeah, because what year was that about? That had to have been at least five. It was 2022?

No, that was- Was it? No, that was M&M.

Okay, because in my head, that was 10 years ago.

Yeah. I've also watched that documentary multiple times, and we were mad about that because that was when they told the girls they have to split it, the time. And we were like, Yeah.

We didn't like that.

Side note, do you know the Seahawks owner is a woman?

I did know that.

That was iconic.

I saw her take the trophy.

Let's work on owning things. I love that. Let's own everything.

Honey, I own businesses. That's one of my favorite vocal stems.

It's Honey, I own business.

Honey, I own businesses. Who is that What is that from? It's like Black China's mom. She's doing a podcast, and they're like, How do you have money? She's like, Honey, I own businesses. Anyway.

Let's start with something controversial. Okay. Vogue wrote an article about Birkenstock shoes and how brides are wearing white Birkenstocks because they're- I commented. Oh, you saw it? Yeah. You go, I reported that post. No, literally.

I blocked them after that.

I was getting tag nonstop.

It was Vogue weddings posted it.

Someone at Vogue is Hannah-coated.

I commented and I said, Where's the line?

I said, Finally, someone has... Look, so many women on their favorite day of their life or whatever are in pain, are in horrible pain. Their Achilles tendon is fighting for its life.

Grab a ballet flat.

You hate a Birkenstock.

Unless you live in Denver and are from Denver, that is the only girl/ woman that I allow Birkenstock. Look, on your wedding day, I know that Birkenstocks are very trendy right now to wear jeans, and some girls, so cute. I'm going to grab a ballet flat over that because I lean a little bit more feminine in how I dress. But I love a masculine or an androgynous outfit. But Birkenstocks are so, to me, crunchy granola. I just went on a hike, and that is just not the energy I'm bringing for my wedding day. Even if they're white. Yeah. I hate the men, and I think that we're... What's the word where it's like we're better than them? I'm not a feminist. You're a Ms. Andres.

Yeah. Ms. Andres.

And so if I'm yelling at them for flip flops or sandals. I can't then tell the women like, Oh, yeah, you can wear this on your... No.

Go barefoot. I'm today dressed as a retired old man, which I think is powerful.

You look like my gym teacher from 2005.

I'm white barrel jeans and an oversize white-colored shirt. I feel like I have opinions on the stock market that no one listens to, but they just nod when I say it.

But it's a Saturday, and you're like, I don't want to really get into it.

Yeah, I don't want to get into it, but I have businesses I have businesses. Oh, my God. So you mentioned that you watched the ice skiing?

Yes, the three episodes. Three episodes.

And I was like, How did I miss that? I realized I saw Glitter and Gold, and I saw two beautiful people. I thought it It was a cheesy Netflix rom-com.

It was like a scripted show.

Scripted rom-com about two people on the ice. And I said, If I had a nickel, I've watched Heated Rivalry. I don't think we're going to beat that. So last night, I am fucking upset.

I knew you were going to love it. I am so jacked up. Because you want to know what? It didn't feel like a documentary. It felt like reality TV that was real.

So to go more in-depth, the chaos of it, it's a pairing. So it's normally either... It's a man and a woman that, of course, end up falling in love with each other and get married because you're so intimate with this person and you have to trust them so much. And there's a compatibility in chemistry you have to have. So these two people got together.

Side note, just because I want to talk about it and not forget it, can we touch back on Margot Robbie and Jacob Alorty after this?

Yes.

Noted. Noted. Dually noted.

We're fighting for our life with our ADHD.

Honestly, It's basically Friday episodes. I'm like, Fuck it.

So this is actually a great movie. So it's this gorgeous girl and this gorgeous guy, but they're just friends.

This is America team you're talking about?

This is America's team. Who, by the way, do you know she designs everyone's outfit? It's the one that designed it. So her competitors are going on. They're like, Oh, Madelyne designed it.

Wait, did I miss that?

Yeah, you were on your phone.

The girl that's married to the guy?

She's known to have the best design taste, and they all designed their own outfits. They're doing full plays. They're doing Broadway shows.

People aren't talking about how stunning she is. I need her on the cover of Vogue.

I need her star in Chicago after Whitney Lovet.

And I need her in Chicago.

I want to be a casting director.

Not that I'm going to see that, but I need her in it.

I mean, deep down, I want you to do it because that would be so funny because you'd be miserable.

I would be miserable.

You're like, I'm so sorry, I have to try to sing this.

No, I would get out of it.

But what people don't understand is that Paige is not bad at singing. I think we should start a...

I'm actually horrible.

No, I saw you accidentally sing once, and it was good. Proceed. Proceed. Anyway, these two, he realizes he's in love with her, and he's five years in, and they're an amazing team. So he's like, If I tell her that I love her and this goes badly, this ruins my career. And it's not easy to just find another top gold performing partner.

It's similar to When girls are like, But the friendship. Fuck the friendship. This is like, Okay, but this would have affected your livelihood and your career. I get that.

This, I actually get why. It's like, Hold it in. Maybe just...

Yeah, hold it in. But when girls are like, Oh, what about our friendship? I'm like, Just say it.

Just jerk off to her and don't say anything. So this man is like, I couldn't hold it in anymore. And I just told her, I love you. So he wasn't even like, he was like, Hey, I think I might be attracted to you when I'm holding you up every Every time.

When my fingers are inside your vagina when we do that one move, I'm really into it.

Or when they put their fucking skates on the guy's leg.

Oh, I'm so glad you notice that, too, because I'm like, How does she get off without slicing him?

No, the fact that they have any... What's it called? Your extremities by the end of any dance is a miracle. Also, she's doing these crazy outfits where the skirt is causing issues. The skirt's blinding him, the skirt's hitting her in the face, the skirt's getting under him. She's tripping over the skirt, and she's like, No, it's for fashion. She's so U-coated. The second I trip over the skirt once, I say, Burn the skirt. I'm wearing khaki pants. Burn it. So he says to her, I love you. And she doesn't take it well immediately. She's like- I just missed all this. You were on your phone. That was on my phone.

That was on my phone.

When I watch your documentary, I'm taking notes.

I started paying attention when the gay guy came on. There's two. I'll get to them. And there was some drama. I was like, okay, the outliers of the bigger skating world.

She processes it and doesn't know what to say, processes it. Next day just goes, I feel exactly the same about you. They're married. But last Olympics, they got fourth. But now the three people who had beaten them are retired. So they are the favorites. So they're coming in so excited, hot and heavy. But then the French team comes through. This gay French guy is The Contius? Crunchman. He is like, I'm scared. I'm terrified. I'd pee myself if he talked to me.

When he came on the screen, I was like, This is a parody.

He's a villain of some kind. He's a gay villain, which everyone needs in their life.

Honestly, I could use him in my life. He was heated rivably and then spit.

Also, he looked at his coach and the coach was scared of him. That's how you know the man is powerful. And he is the perfect filler in his face where his face is not moving and he doesn't have move it because he has no emotion.

Also, the story, it just lends itself to a movie, like a comedy movie being made about this.

Well, do you remember Amy Poehler had a Blades of Glory? It was about all these dancing couples in their crazy outfits.

Amy Poehler was in that?

I think she had a cameo. Oh, did she? I think she did.

Because it was- When in doubt, Amy Poehler was in it. It was Will Farrell. She wrote it or- Whenever my dad is talking about a female comedian. I just say Amy Poehler because that's really the only person he... And he's like, Yeah.

So the T is that he won gold last year and retired. Everyone's like, Okay, great. This guy retired. And then his ex-partner writes a biography saying that he was horrible to her and was really hard on her, which no one's doubting. The man is scary. But then this other girl, she was with a man who gets accused of assault.

Oh, I didn't realize that's why he was out.

Yeah. He's under investigation. So she loses her partner of 20 years.

She didn't want to be done. She was forced to be done.

And he But it's also her partner, she's like, Do I support him? Do I not?

No, they're a great story to win.

Both of them have so much controversy, but they happen to be best friends. And I actually see their friendship, and it's really like... You can tell they both... She was like, I wasn't going to skate. I didn't even know where my life was going to be.

Can we just take a minute for their names?

These are made of names.

This is... Wait, who's the one?

It's Jacques Seymouche. I don't know.

It's like something Jean Poiraut.

I'm Jean-Pierre Jacques-Cosson. Also, I want to learn French so bad. It's so sexy. You love pretty things. I don't. When they were skating, I was like, this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. She's also really powerful, and she talks about, It's so fucked up. These female skaters, they're not just getting rated on how good their moves are. They're getting rated on their makeup. They're getting rated on their outfit. Judges are literally going, I don't like her makeup.

Same with the gymnastics girls, how their hair is. What?

The way that I would immediately fail, but the girls should not be graded. That's taste. But that's what they were saying is that the judging is based focused on art, and it's like, Oh, I just didn't like how their dance made me feel, which makes me, you know how I am.

Yeah, you hate things that are unfair.

That is unfair. But can I just say? Because I did get some messages being like, Hey, I also have a justice thing. I hate when things are unfair. So what do you do when something's not fair? You're just like, That's life.

Well, the blonde from Canada, she kept getting scored, and she was like, I'm a professional figure skater, and you're scoring me.

Also, she kept getting cancer.

Yeah, and her mom died. Her mom died. She was like, You keep scoring me as if I'm an amateur skater. I am a professional. She spoke up. She's one of the only ones that spoke up. And then I almost feel like because she spoke up, they tried to fuck her even more.

Taylor's the oldest time.

It's just interesting to think that in every genre, every... What am I even trying to say? Every industry has a situation situation where it's like the girls are looked down on. It's like, okay, well, you're not.

And I do have to say, the gay men in ice skating. Hot. How attracted were you to... That he was so your type. And then he starts-I feel like I dated someone. But it's funny. He was like, I came out four years ago. Keith, the guy just came out.

And I'm like, Yeah, that's my type.

But it also makes me think if these guys were straight, would they be hockey players? Or are they just hockey players?

I mean, he could have gone into hockey.

Hockey and ice dancing are so close.

He actually probably be so fucking good at hockey. He probably be so good at hockey. Because I feel like he's quick.

Yeah. And he's strong. His butt. I was objectifying that, man. I said, yes, Spin around again. Spin around again.

Honestly, and his face. He was a good-looking man. Gorgeous. I'm so glad you watched it. I knew you would like it.

Well, then when you're done with it, they're like, We're about to be ready for the Olympics. You realize it's on. So you're going, the Olympics are happening. So then I go to Peacock and I They had their first dance. So I watched it, and the French did amazing. I didn't watch the Americans yet.

Was it their freestyle or the- It was the first one.

But you know what's also so funny? In the dance, they don't actually do big jumps. It's all dance.

Yeah, they're ice dancers.

They're ice dancers. And what would you wear if you were an ice dancer?

Oh, God.

I know you've thought about it.

I mean, I just love- No lace. You hate I hate lace. I would have a lot of pink, sheer moments. I feel like the- You want a high collar. I actually have thought about it.

You love a high collar.

I love a bedazzle, the blonde from Canada. She was showing a My Fair Lady, and I was like,. I loved that. I just think a little mini skirt. I don't love that they're doing the longer skirts. I just feel like they look a little matronly, but maybe the shorter skirts look a little I was actually obsessed with the look that the French girl has in her first dance with the black sleeve and the circular bodice thing.

I would have worn it.

I have actually PTSD from dance class when I was seven because I remember a dance teacher told my mom I didn't fit my unitard, and my mom was like, How dare you say that?

I can't fit a bodysuit around my vulva because my torso is too And so if you see me in a bodysuit, it's not Cliff. And I have a fat ass. Thank you for bringing that to Forefront. So I love that. It reminds me of when I played tennis. I never cared about the outfits, where now I look back and realize there were girls that were like you, where everything was about the matchday outfit, where I literally was like, I can't wear my practice clothes.

That's to bring it back to the Super Bowl, but people aren't talking enough about Coco Jones singing.

I love Coco. We interviewed her.

Wait, what did she sing? Not the National Anthem. Whatever. She did so well, but she did a play on Whitney Houston's outfit, and she looked so good and cool.

She's the next one that she She's been popped. She won a Grammy, but her skill is there, and now it's just the Hollywood- Yeah, she's about to be extremely famous. The Hollywood Ether. There's a lot talk about Catseye after the Grammys. Are you on that algorithm?

You know why I'm not? Because I feel like that's so Gen Z.

My algorithm is so Gen Z. It's just people... Well, they did this song called Narly, and it's like...

I feel like I've heard Sing a little ballad.

The lyrics are like... I guess I thought it was humorous, but they're like, Tesla, Narly.

That hasn't come across my mind.

And they're doing a whole dance, and everyone was like... They wanted, I guess, more. But people have to understand these girls are not choosing the song. They're a corporations. These singers are corporations.

And Catseye is 12 girls, right?

It's five or six of them, and it was based on a competition. Like all these girls battled it out to be the first American K-pop group.

This one right over my head. So this was a talent search, and they put together Cat's Eye, and that's them, and they're the first American K-pop group.

And one of the girls that didn't make it, now she's doing really well individually. And she's really talented, and people think she's going to pop it anyway. I tried to watch it. I cannot watch Teenagers' Dreams Die. No.

Well, that's a normal reaction.

They're like, You're not pretty. You're not smart. You're not funny. You're not brave. And I'm like, She has braces. Leave her alone.

Okay, not to literally start a book club.

I knew you were going to do this. The second I said, Pretty Girls Start Book Clubs, you were like, Maybe I should start mine.

So a lot of the gigglers were DMing me, and they were like, Hey, so Nightingale might be a bit too... They're just surmising at your reading level. Might be a bit intense for you. It's going to take you eight years to finish that. We recommend maybe getting something a little lighter so that when you get sick of Nightingale, you can... So I got Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Now I'm reading two books at once.

Wait, you love that seven Husbands?

Well, because I started it years ago and I never finished it, and I forget everything about it. So I'm like, I'll just reread that. But I also now because I'm so into reading books that are movies, I ordered Wuthering Heights.

Wuthering Heights. Wuthering. Are you?

Is it Wuthering or Wuthering? Wuthering.

I think it's Wuthering.

Wuthering. Wuthering?

It's W-U.

You. Withering.

Withering. Withering.

I don't even know what that means.

Wuthering.

Wuthering Heights.

Wuthering Heights. Des told me that it's an incredible story. Des loves history.

Okay, well, everyone keeps saying that the original story is so No, not what the movie is. So I wanted to... I feel like I read it in high school, but I honestly can't freaking remember.

Should we see Wuthering Heights together?

I definitely want to see it. The PR of it, first of all, love Margot Robbie's outfits. I'd like to credit you for doing the random clothes first in your hair.

Stop.

And wearing that dress was very Wuthering Heights coded before Wuthering Heights press tour.

Do you think it's another I was too early for my time?

I think it was another you were too early. And I really I think that you should look into Margot Robbie's stylist because he's exactly what you're looking for. He's putting her in Vintage Galliano. Her looks for this press tour, it's not like she has one good look or like, Oh, there's another. It's every single look.

I like that they're having fun with it. I like that they're being intentional. I like that they're performing.

Yeah, they're performing.

I hate when it's just like, make me look cute in this.

And so that part of the The PR is extremely relatable to me. The part of the PR with her and Jacob Alorty, and I don't know how much of this is true or legitimately just PR, but if it's legitimately just PR, stop. Literally, it's weird and uncomfortable.

Is it when she was like, I became codependent on him and I can't leave him alone or something?

That and also he put a million roses in my trailer and I told him I'm in love with him.

Wait, what?

The first time we got duped with a PR stunt like that was A Star is Born. We were all like, They're in love. Then we quickly realized, Oh, no, they wanted us to see the movie. We were going to see it anyway.

That's our PR for Giggly Squad. Everyone's like, Are they married? Or are they fighting because it's a lovers' quarrel?

But I'm like, Is Margot Robbie's husband the strongest soldier ever alive?

I was going to say, Jacob Alorty, whether you like him or not, whether you think he's boring or not, whether you think he's cocky or not, he is the hottest guy right now. Totally.

And I feel like in any interview I've seen, he seems extremely respectful and very nice and down to earth.

And he's Australian. When he first popped out his Australian accent, I said, Oh, this man is layered. And he's got depth to him. People don't talk about it, but he's like 6'5.

And one time he did an interview, and they were like, Where are you? And he was in a hotel room. Then he panned the camera, and his mom was sitting right there. And I was He's a good man, Savannah.

If a man has a mom, some people say they're a good man. But compared to... I'm sorry, Glenn Powell doesn't do it for me. Glenn Powell doesn't do it for you. I'm not getting butterflies when Glenn Powell comes on my screen.

I'm going to say something. I actually met Glenn Powell at Kelly and Mark. In person, very much a movie star.

I could see that. And I'm not saying he's not a movie star. I'm just saying you don't get the hots for him.

In person, I did.

Jacob The Lord is ruining your life. That man you're meeting one night.

Well, do you watch Euphoria?

I watched the first season. Season and a half.

Oh, okay. Because his character in that, I'm like... Yeah.

Even him and the other one with Barry Keoghan running around. He always just plays the guy who- What happened to him? Barry Keoghan is going to be... Good question. He did, it's a weird Carpenter. That was the greatest thing he ever did. But he is playing Ringo Star in the new Beatles movie Coming up.

Remember he had that quote and he was like, Yeah, I'm just trying to be a good dad. So I see him once every 30 days. And we were like, What?

Wait, so it currently reminds me if I have this bit on stage where I'm talking about, Should I have a kid or not? And I'm trying to figure it out with the audience. And someone was like, You can do it. You can imagine it. And I'm like, I'm not a male comedian. I can't just have a child and leave them at home and go on tour.

Well, one of my favorite quotes someone said on the internet was, I don't want to be a mom, but I'd love to be a dad. And ever since I heard that, I was like, no. And I'm someone that I can say from a child, I have never wavered whether or not I want to have kids. I know I want to have kids. But being in my adult life, some of the closest people to me, we've talked and they've been like, I don't know if I want them. And it's been such an open, good conversation. Well, it's good.

I've wavered. I think it's healthy to be like, And what if? We have free will. What if? And I think for me, it's just because I compare myself to other male comics sometimes who are my age. And I'm like, Oh, my God. If I have a kid and they have a kid, we're going to have such a different experience. But then the girls are also like, Hannah, you have a long torso, and you'll be able to make fun of it in a way that the men can't.

No, that's actually so true. You'll have so much relatable.

And then I was saying I could bring the baby and leave it in the green room. But like, Ali Colbert cannot. If you've met Ali, I'm not leaving my baby with Ali Colbert.

No, honestly, my assistant is so excited for me to get pregnant so that her job description changes. She's like, Let's do something else here.

But Daphne is like, Hi.

Daphné is going to be a menace, I feel like, when I have a child.

Well, my brother has a kid, two kids, and it's a good cat. And at first, the cat was definitely perturbed because the baby is to understand. And you're gentle. But then for some reason, the cat understands that it's a baby.

Wait, speaking of babies, I don't know if I said this, but I just literally this year is the first time I've had two extremely close girlfriends. One had a baby, and one is currently pregnant. I've gone to friends' weddings and whatever, but we just hit the phase where they're having children. One, it's so crazy. And you realize that there isn't this big, Oh, I've changed as a person. It's just like your friend, and now she has a baby. But I have to say- She got a purse that has a lot of responsibility. No, literally. I'm like, So you're bringing her everywhere with us?

It's pukes, poops.

But I have to say, My one girlfriend, Ariana, she's- Grande. She's a nurse. She's just the perfect human. She's also stunning, beautiful, gorgeous. But when she sent me a picture of her baby, literally fresh out of the I was like, Ariana, you know me. I'm not just saying this because you're my friend. This is the prettiest newborn I've ever seen. What did you do? And she said, she ate so much fruit every single day. And she was like, I'm not kidding. I really think that's why she's so pretty. Granted, her and her husband are very good-looking people. And she's a nurse- That's like Margot Robin being like, If you eat fruit, your kid will come out looking like me. No, but I feel like as a nurse, and she's a NICU nurse, so she really knows babies. I'm literally writing that down to say on the pod because that's some information we needed.

Yeah. Go on TikTok shop and buy this, and your kid will be so good-looking. By the way, are you still TikTok shopping?

I TikTok shop here and there. A lot of times I go over to Amazon because I'm a millennial.

Yeah. So you see it and then you put it in Amazon. I do feel like sometimes it's so cheap deep that I'm like, I'm not going to get it. Like that it's fake. Right. And I get confused.

It is so freaking easy that I just double click that side button.

Because Apple Pay feels like it's not real money.

I mean, I bought my tuning forks. Now I'm inundated with the Tuning Fork Girls, and now I'm actually planning a sound bath retreat.

You have a tuning bath retreat coming up?

The girls have convinced me. One girl DMed me this morning, and she was like, Hey, big tuning fork, girl here. I keep them in my car because I have road rage. I was like, You're the epitome of a giggler, I feel like.

Wait, I feel like women are allowed to have road rage.

Yeah, because we don't take out guns.

Yeah. When men have road rage, bad things happen. When women have road rage, I'm like, She's standing up for herself. She's being independent. She's taking up space.

Speaking of road rage, did you see that story about the professional football player who was dating the WMBA girl, and he chased her down in the car, and she drove to the police station?

That's crazy. She's like, You didn't think of that. She's like, Come and get me.

I guess she broke up with him.

Okay. Classic CTE tale.

She broke up with him. They were dating for three years. She broke up with him. He was stalking her, and she was like, Stop stalking me. Blocked his number, whatever. And then she's driving on a Saturday morning, and she realizes he's behind her, and he's trying to hit her car. So she, I think, calls the police while she's in the but just drive to the police station, the police come out, get him. It's like- Got you. No, literally.

This is also an example of social media when you see people in relationships with, I don't know, athletes. It's not always what it seems. And some of these men, just because you're good at a game doesn't mean you're good at being a person.

I would say that for all public figures.

Yes. If he's so influential and charismatic that he accidentally gets famous, but to try to get famous and have a publicist.

Unless you are a true talent. Yes. You have to be a true savant.

Unless it's the the world needs your talent to become a better place, then I'm like, Okay, that's fine. You have the voice of an angel.

But if it's just you having a podcast, no. Girls are different, obviously. You have a lot to say. 100%. We've been through a lot.

We've been suppressed, so Obviously, now we have to overcompensate. Which leads me to...

I can't wait to what it leads to.

I have two different things I could go.

Perfect. We could go in either direction.

There's no way to feel cool while you're talking into your remote. There's nothing more humbling than trying to say... It's like your customer service voice, but also-Wait, this actually is so funny because- You know what's even funnier? I don't do that. I thought about it, and I realized it's like Bluetooth. I don't trust it. I'm typing it in.

You're such a freak, Hannah.

Because I don't trust which button to press for it to happen, and I don't even try. I'm an old lady.

Well, I just got a new phone, and so I was setting up my phone, whatever, and one of the parts is set up Siri. And so to set up Siri, you have to say these certain prompts, Siri, what's the weather? Siri, and so I did it. And then I was like, wait a minute. I just did that in my customer service voice. It's not going to recognize my real voice, and I have a cold.

You're coughing the entire time. I'm like, I'm fucked. That's how you open your phone, you cough twice. Also, I have a big gripe with the new phone, a huge gripe. I have a huge one. It's not what you think it's going to be. What is yours? My favorite thing in the world, my only number one hobby that brings me consistent joy is screenshotting things that I'm never going to look at again. In the new phone, you don't just screenshot. You have to screenshot, put in your social security number, give your first born, say where you want to save it, add to, divide by twelve.

Who decided that? Don't even get me started on the photos. I'm like, oh, great. A photo from 2007. Where's the one I took today?

You can't find it. You can't find it.

I'm like, hello.

Also, I think it's a glitch, but when I send a lot of files, so when I go into something I said to you and I want to see something I sent you, a photo, and I press info, it's not coming up.

No.

I'm in disarray.

My gripe with the new phone is I have royalty fingers. I have the longest, skiniest fingers you can get. I'm a dream to text. Okay? I can get there I'm Sheena Shay's child. Okay?

I'm thinking that's opposite. I press one letter and it hits eight letters.

I sound drunk every single day. The texting is so touchy. And the word correction, I'm like, now Why in the hell would I want to say that when that's not a word?

Also, they always go to sex or something inappropriate. Oh, really? I feel like mine. Well, because you're always like, one sec, and I always says one sex.

That means you're typing the word sex a lot. Am I? Because it's like, Oh, she means this word. She always says all the time.

Because that's how I literally sexed my husband. I'm like, Let's have sex because I've lost all creativity.

Mine is just not real words. I'm like, Okay, that doesn't make any sense. Then I have to be like, Sorry. Well, that's the thing.

I'd rather I send the wrong real word than just gibberish. Do you remember when people could speak pig Latin? I was like, If I don't learn Pig Latin, I'm going to be behind. You're going to be fine. I'm not going to be prepared for the future.

I thought, Wow, in high school, I'm not going to have any friends.

I was like, Where did all How did people learn Pig Latin? Did I sleep late that day? When was Pig Latin class?

I think I knew it for maybe part of fourth grade, but I don't remember. It's just every word backwards.

Backwards, yeah. They would say something to you and you'd I don't get it. And they're like, well, catch up.

And then once you got it, you were like...

No, I still didn't get it. I'm having trouble pronouncing a word, and I need your help.

Origin?

B-r-o-o-c-h. B?

Sorry, I have to write it. B-r-o-o-c-h.

Because they're becoming very pop. Brooch. I thought it was brooch.

Well, that would be a U.

Brooch. Or is it brooch or is it brooch?

It's a brooch. It's a brooch. Also, first of all, brooch doesn't have two O's.

Everyone's spelling it with two O's right now. I have to go to the- That's the thing. I thought it was brooch too, but brooch, I would put O-A-C-H. So all the girls are wearing brooches, and I accidentally said brooch in front of someone, and I still haven't mentally recovered. I haven't recovered because saying brooch in front of another girl is like... She was like, What did you say? I was like, I've been...

Oh, it is two O. See, I would have only done one.

See, what is going on?

Well, it's... Sorry, what's the origin of the word?

I do encourage everyone to buy some vintage brooches and put it on their bags, put it on their blazers. I think, honestly, from traders and Lisa Rinna having a deadly brooch, it's really-The word history, middle English brooch.

B-r-o-c-h-e, pointed instrument brooch.

See, that makes sense spelled like that. Or maybe it is brooch, but the British say brooch.

Brooch. Rimes with cooch.

Wait, cooch, brooch?

No, it's definitely brooch, Hannah. Okay. How do you feel about the men wearing brooches?

I don't hate it. I don't hate it, but I'm not having sex with you. I can appreciate the art.

Okay, exactly.

Yeah. It's like short men. They exist. They're alive. I support them.

We think they should be allowed to vote, but like...

Can I say another thing about TV? Yeah. What are we talking about TV? The girls don't always realize how tall men actually are, and they have to factor that into a lot of scenarios that they can't. I'm just saying, especially reality TV, people don't know the heights of men, and it factors into a lot of things. There's certain guys that people are like, Why does anyone like him? I'm like, Well, he's tall. Then there's certain guys that people are like, Why don't people like him And I'm like, He's actually really short. But you can't tell. Wait, when people see you in real life, what is the feedback you get on you physically? Do they say...

I get you're prettier in person. Oh, my God, you're so pretty in person.

That is brutal.

Yeah, it's is because I'm like, what do I look like on TV? No, that's brutal. But I know that they're meaning it in a compliment Oh, my God, I didn't imagine you to be this pretty in person. So I know it's a compliment. But when I hear it, they say it almost shocked. You're pretty in person.

They shouldn't say you're pretty in person. Just say you're so pretty. You don't have to say prettier because then it makes you feel like you look like shit everywhere.

But a lot of times I do get you're a lot shorter than I thought you were going to be.

I get you taller than I thought. I'm 5'7. Page is, I would say 5'4.

Yeah.

You think you're 5'3?

I actually think I might be 5'2.

I think you told me only 5,4 once, and I just ran with it.

Yeah, that's what I say to everyone. But if we really got a measuring tape out, I think I would be just hitting 5'3.

Also, you always wear heels, so I actually have never seen your real height.

Here's the thing. I'm all leg. I'm no torse. You look so tall in photos. Yeah. So I come off, even in person, taller because it's almost like you're only seeing my legs. Okay, you're taller than me, but my legs start.

I think People think I'm shorter in person because they see my nubby legs, and they're like, There's no way that her torso is that long.

You're the Britney Spears of Giggly Squad.

And people don't talk about it.

Wait, I feel like I was going to say something before we went off on a tangent, and then, no, I can't remember.

We were talking about brooches.

It was after Margot Robbie, Kim Kardashian, and Lewis Hamilton. We didn't even touch on it.

I'm not When I say not supportive, I mean, I don't get passionate about celebrity relationships. I always think they're PR. I'm always like, okay, cool, whatever. Sometimes I actively don't like them. I fucking love this for her. Why do I love it so much?

Also, did you see Kanye, like, tweeted or extra Instagram comment? I don't freaking out. He's such a freak. He goes, why are you... What did he say? It's not funny, but it's also like you're insane. Why are you? It was like he was texting her. He was like, why are you dating It's giving me back my daughter. It's also like, Kanye, you have three other kids with Kim.

Also, Lewis Hamilton. I did see him in person at the F1 premiere I was at.

Cute. Cute. Is he short? Tall. Tall.

Stylish. Aura. Powerful. Confident. Is he British?

What a haiku you just said to us. That was honestly one of the most beautiful sonnets I've ever heard. And then you ended it with a question. That was a haiku.

Is He has the calmness about him, but he understands, obviously, high pressure because his job is insane. It's as violent as skiing. You could die. You could die every time.

It's also like...

If you could handle a race car, you could handle Kim Kardashian.

It's one of the chicest... I love it.

Which is crazy that chic because it's cars with oil, but it's like...

Yeah, but it's in Monaco.

It's like Aston Martin.

You have to be rich to even get into It's like, what's the thing when they get on the horse? Yeah. What is that? Polo. Polo. It's like Polo. It's like a rich sport, which is also very deadly.

There's like, rich men who love racing, who make their own little race car teams and just pay for guys to race their cars. And some guys, their full career is getting paid by a rich man to race cars for him. And that's an This is an algorithm we didn't even know could be.

I looked over at a man's Instagram reels. I'll stop there the other day, and he was just watching people fist fighting in the backyard, but it was a ring of people. I was like, Is this real and illegal? What is this? He was like, No, it's just like, Backyard fighting. What the fuck is backyard fight? He's like, It's just boxing in the backyard. I'm like, Go to work. Do you have a call or something?

Does it box? They're trying to put clothes away.

Yeah, isn't there an email you should attend to or something? This is crazy. Wait, the other thing about Lewis Hamilton, and every time I say his name- Very regal. Every time I say his name, though, I do think of Hamilton, the musical. Oh. Anyhow.

He was Hamilton.

But the lore that he was dating Nicole Scherzinger for a year. She was the number one wag. She was a wag before it was cool to be a wag.

Do you know why I like that? Because I do like when guys have a type, I like consistency.

And now we've said it.

I said it. He likes a star with long dark hair who has a beautiful body.

Who's like, I would assume a similar strong personality.

Her and Kim, they give me similar auras.

Here's the other thing that I will give to the men. Men who have a little bit of ambition are smart enough to know that dating a woman with equal amount of ambition only makes them better.

A great man needs a great woman behind him, and a great woman just needs a great woman.

It's obvious that Lewis Hamilton doesn't get insecure about dating powerful women. Well, that's the thing.

And yeah, with Kim, I do think sometimes she gets in a position where she's mothering the guy she's with. We don't know her real relationships. But like, Pete Davidson, for example, I'm like, he's just one of the kids in the back seat. Where Lewis Hamilton, that's a man.

It's what you said the last pod when you were like, you have to have the same amount of swag.

They don't have a swag.

And when there's a discrepancy I see you're like...

I feel like Shil can learn stuff from him. He's worldly.

I feel like it's going to be new and fun for her. I'm very happy for her.

I'm excited about this.

Yeah, it's someone that I could really see her I don't know his age. Spell it L-E-W-I-S.

Yeah, spell it out for me. Don't make me... Is it Louie?

41. 41.

I love that age.

You want to know what? He's her type, too. Yes. Let's see how old Kim is.

Well, she loves an athlete. She loves an athlete. She loves an athlete.

45.

Perfect. Perfect. She's stunning. I would argue he still isn't fully mature. That happens to men at 43.

I feel like it just- According to Instagram, but it's starting. No, it's crazy. I feel like for our generation, 40 is almost like the new 30, where 10 years ago, it was like, if you're not married and have a baby by 30, you're done for. But now I feel like it's almost like 40 is when you're really starting your life.

I need to say it, but I have friends who are 30. If they got pregnant right now, I'd be like, What do you want to do with it?

No, I'd be like, I'm going to call someone because this is Whatever you need to do, you let me know. I will say my two friends that just had babies are my two most capable friends, or my one friend that had a baby and my one friend that's pregnant.

I've only had one pregnancy rumor once, and I thrive off it.

I'm waiting for my Ozempic rumors, but guess they're missing. Guess those are missing.

Well, thank you guys so much for giggling with us. We love you so much, and we'll talk to you later. Bye.