Transcript of #3151 Vanderpump Rules S12E04&05 Part Two: Angelicas and Demons

Hi, everyone. Welcome back. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. That way, you get your episodes. But enough of that. Let's get right back into the episode. So she goes, Until recently, I thought he would love us no matter what. I'm like, You guys were the ones who sassed off to him. If I remember correctly, Venus had a conversation with Marcus, where he was basically like, You need to get your shit together. And then Marcus wrote Venus a text that was like, Fuck you, bro. Our friendship's basically over. Venus was like, Fuck you. I never liked you in the first place. And then Marcus then told everyone what happened. But this was Marcus, who escalated it. And they're acting like Venus out of the blue just came for them. And no, Venus was giving tough love, and you guys were the fuckers.

Yeah, but Venus was too much. And also, Venus betrayed Kim in her mind because Venus was sticking up for Natalie. He was telling Marcus, You need to go in there and stand up for Natalie against Kim because Kim's coming for Natalie, and you know that you've called her your sister. Whatever that stupid fight was. So I think Kim's like, Oh, you're supposed to be my gay best friend, and then you betrayed me by telling my boyfriend, instead of coming to be nice to me, to go stick up against me with Natalie. I think that's the real problem. But Venus will never see that, and Kim will never vocalize it because she thinks she's being sneaky. He was like, What are you talking about? I got mad at you, but you guys are the ones who outed me to everybody as far as my gossip. You told everybody I talk. You ruined every relationship I have in this place, basically. She goes, Okay, fair. That's fair. Yeah, you're the bigger asshole here, man.

Yeah, that's way worse than him saying, be nicer to Natalie. Also, he's not property of Kim. I get it. You want your friends to be loyal, et cetera. But he's also allowed to be friends with Natalie, and he's allowed to see that there's all this bullshit that's going on between these. That was Marcus, who was the real issue in that stupid fight with Natalie. He's allowed to stand up for Natalie. Kim doesn't get to just be like, Oh, because he stood up for Natalie, that then we, as a couple, are going to fire off a really hostile mean taxi. Yeah.

Well, there's also the element of being the gay friend because it is like property. It's not the same as being a regular friend. For whatever reason. Yes, exactly. It's just not. It's like, That's my gay friend, and my gay friend wouldn't even be there for me, and stands up at this other girl instead? Oh, fine. Then it just becomes like, Okay, I'm going to ruin the gay friend to everybody else and say all this shit. I don't know. There is something different about it being the gay. It's like they feel like, Oh, well, he's the gay, so he's lucky to be with us because he's not with anybody, and he's lucky to have us as an ally as a couple, since he can't have a couple. He's just the gay. There's something about that.

There is. God, this show really is good. I love the stupid thing that we're talking about on this episode between this fight and with everything with Jason and Angelika. You cannot tell me this show is not entertaining. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This is a good to the show.

To me, my favorite Raine Cloud. I love that to me. Yeah, he's hair-flipping, and Kim's like, Yeah, but whatever. That wasn't right. I guess I should apologize. Then to me, it comes out like, cool. Like, rain cloud. She's like, Hi, are we okay? Because it's pretty crowded, so you should get back to work. Thanks.

I just love her hatred of everyone.

Well, she's also the manager of Morons. I mean, this is like, it's like, okay, we're in the middle of a premiere party. The restaurant is full, everything's busy, and they're like, Do you want to go outside and cry for half an hour? Okay, sure. Yeah. They're just sitting there smoking cigarettes. Like, hello.

I feel like all she wants to do is finish some bowl from Cava that she got for lunch, and she just can't find the time to do it because everyone is constantly outside having conversations. Can you guys come in and cover the bar so I can finally finish my bowl from Cava?

It's always fucking melted. Like, her bowl from Cava is always melted by the time she gets back every time.

Some sad chickpeas are left, and she's like, Well, that's not even fresh anymore.

Yeah.

So, Kim is like, Okay, well, let's maybe try and talk again. Because I think I'm obviously struggling with Natalie right now, and your closeness with her isn't necessarily comforting, nor do I feel comfortable being super close to you right now because of that. So she's Well, we can make up. There we go. But you're my toy, and you have to stay in my toy chest. Yeah.

Who's gay are you? So he's like, Well, love you. Hair flick, hair flick, hair flick. And he's like, I don't feel like Kim is fully hearing me. So at this point, I'm just going to love her where we are, and I'm just going to move forward and flick my hair a lot until I have an aneurysm. Because there's literally nothing I can do except make you wonder why every time I'm sitting here in a confessional, one of my eyes is crying. Have you noticed that? What is that? Why is his left eye, our right eye, is always crying? Did he just do a bump in that part of his… on that side of his nose? I need to know what's happening.

I would like to know why he's dressed like he's a long-lost cast member of the movie Widows. Why does he look like he's trying to break into a mansion and steal a vase?

Why is Abba styling He's got like, I'm going to do my best crimped hair, but all-black leather and glove outfit.

So that way, after I'm done with this, I'm going to break into Adrian Malouf's house and take a TV. Why is he dressed like this?

I don't know, but I think it's working. I think we're just like old, feather-deady gays because I was out last week in West Hollywood, and I was talking to a gay, and he's like, Oh, my God, the new Van der Prump rules, iconic. The gay, iconic. Like, instant icon. I'm going to fucking love him. His fashion, his hair, his gloves. I was like, Wow, I guess.

He's serving a look for sure. It's just very funny for this show. This is a show we're in every confessional. All the guys have their shirts unbuttoned down to their navel, and he's fully buttoned. He's all the way covered up in all this black. He literally looks like he just took off his bala klava to do the interview, and he's going to put it back on. And he's going to scale down the side of some museum loop style.

I love that bala klavas are coming up twice in a recap. It was so good.

Did you mention a bala klava earlier?

Yeah, it was my last act of putting all my clothes in OnlyFans.

The bala klava.

Oh, God. Now, Jason arrives at the jiu-jitsu date. He arrives and he's like, Yeah, Angelika is like a Taekwondo two-time black belt. It's super impressive. I'm not a pro in Taekwondo, but I love jiu-jitsu. It's just about turning joints. You're supposed to turn your in ways that they're not supposed to go. That's my thing.

That's great. It's exciting. He's doing some flips and cartwheels and all this stuff, and Angelika walks in, and Shimula is like, That's cool that you're doing these flips, but you didn't tie your belt correctly. Here, I'll fix that for you.

He's just like, You don't even know how to tie your belt. He's like, Yeah, you're not going to do it for me?

We find out that she's a second-degree black belt in Taekwondo, and she was on the national for three years, which is crazy. We see pictures of her doing this, and we see just her practicing and kicking, and it's crazy. It's amazing. She's like, Yeah, I mean, this is different because this is joints.

What I knew is it's different because it's groundwork. I don't know. I guess it's strange positions he's excited to put me in.

Now, they're going to do some exercises and everything, and Jason The instructor flips Jason over and they're going to do this thing. Now, Jason's going to flip Angelika over, or Angelika is going to flip Jason over. They're just doing floor exercises and stuff, and it's back and forth. But then Jason takes Angelika and whips her around his behind and slams her to the ground, and she's like, Whoa, that was a lot right there. She's like, What the fuck?

Yeah, it was super weird. Yeah, he's getting too aggressive with her. Also, she doesn't know this. She doesn't know this discipline, so he's just swinging her around the slam and go to the ground and getting on top of her. It's not sexy. He's just trying to win. She's grossed out. She's grossed out by it.

He now has her pin down on the ground in a flirty way. She's on the ground, and he's grappling her, and he's over her. At this moment, on their date, he goes, I got to be honest with you with something, though. Not going to lie. At the time, I was talking to somebody, but I just want to know that it's done. It's like, she asked you if you were talking to someone, and you said no, and now you lied again. It's amazing. How many bear traps can you step into? What is wrong with this person? Then he goes, Yeah, me and Angelika are starting on a new slate, and I feel more vulnerable. I feel more safe with Angelika. I just want to open up to her. I like wearing my heart on my sleeve and showing her who I truly am. Who you truly are is a liar.

A liar, you're a fucking liar, a big-time, multiple-time liar. Now he's still on top of her, and he's like, The person I was talking to was somebody that was so important to me at the time. But then the time showed me that they weren't the right match. I'm open to see what the next step is with you. And she's like, Okay.

Wait, this is also crazy. He just shut up. Stop saying... I think he's trying to be like, That's how much I like you is that I got rid of this other person who meant a lot to me. I'm like, Do they really mean a lot to you if you met this one girl who you blocked on Instagram?

Yeah.

I know you didn't even want to hang out with at Barney's Beanery, but you're going to dump someone over that? I'm like, No, something is not... This is bullshit over here.

Yeah, she's like, Can I be honest with you?

Could you be honest with me? Let me be honest with you. Could you be honest with me?

He's like, Okay, for sure.

Do you have a situation going on?

This is the flashback. Now she's like, Whatever. This guy fucking lied to me. The producer asked her, Does Jason know about your ex? She's like, I mean, yes. We see a flashback of her saying she still lives with the ex. He asked, Did you say that you were still sleeping with him?

She's like, Well, I may not have used those words exactly, but I think it's pretty obvious because I can still live with him. I mean, duh.

Yeah, I mean, she probably should be a little bit more explicit, but the point is that she asked him if he was in a situation, and he said, Explicitly, no. Now, he's saying that not only was he not in a situation, he's now saying he was… I'm sorry. Now, is he not only saying that he was in a situation, but he was in a situation with someone who was really important to him. I was like, Why are you so bad at this?

Yeah, he really is. So, he tries to kiss her. He's still straddling her, and she's like, No. Then she gets out of it, and he's like, Okay, well, this I have a kiss. I mean, that's not the biggest thing. I mean, maybe she's just playing games. I don't know. Oh, you're such a dumb ass.

So, impressively dumb in a way that was refreshing to see. I feel like we haven't seen We haven't seen this level of idiocy in a little bit. So it feels great. It feels like a warm hug. Now, speaking of, we now go see the eyebrows over at their apartment where Chris is filming something. It's like, is he like...

They're doing a joint? No. Yeah, they're doing a joint OnlyFans, but for Mother's Day. So fucking weird. Do you blow each other at the end of this? What is happening? It's weird. So he's like, Hey, what's going on, guys? How are you doing today? We're getting crafty. As you can see, I've got a bouquet of flowers for my mom because Mother's Day is around the corner, even though she doesn't live here. But whatever. I'll enjoy the flowers. Love you, mom. Got my cousin Jason here. We're both mama's boys. We both love our moms, and we both got corn holes. Let's see what we're going to What do you do with them today.

I know. Here's a great gift. You can take these flowers and stick them up your corn hole, and take a photo of it. That's for you, mom.

Hey, mom, sorry. Can't say Happy Mother's Day with my mouthful. Jesus, Jason, back off, okay? It's not your time yet.

When it comes on my face, I'm dedicating it to you, Mom, I only got here from my one way, and it's because someone did this with you. So, Jason, this is, again, this is actually We always talk about how the fuck boys are always talking about how they really emphasize how much they love their moms. So this is all like Only Vans fuck boyerism. And so they're doing this, and Jason's telling us, The journey with me and Chris moving to California was just like any typical actor story. The first five months in LA, I was grinding as a server, working at a spa, and I was also working at a club, and I had three jobs. Chris says, Yeah, first move to LA. It was not really what I was expecting. I thought like, Hello, your lead actor for the Tangled Reboot is here. But it didn't really happen. I thought it would just find me at the diner.

But no, we barely had anything.

Such sad news on that front, by the way. Have you heard of that?

The Tangled?

New Tangled movie cast Tegan Croft and Milo Mannheim. I mean, you got beat out by a Mannheim. Cameron Mannheim is somewhere right now like, Suck it, Vanderpump rules loser. Enjoy blowing your cousin for the next decade.

Ha ha ha ha. Bang. That was three hours ago. That is forush news, and that really is Cameron Mannheim's son. I didn't talk it. Oh, is it?

I didn't know that that was really Cameron Mannheim's son. I just stood up.

Tangled Star, Milo Mannheim is following in Mom, Cameron Mannheim's Footsteps.

There you go. Little Boston legal. Don't fuck with a Boston legal B player. I shouldn't call her a B player. Supporting player.

She won an Emmy Award for something.

Cameron Mannheim for or Boston Legal, I think.

Or The Practice, one of those.

It was The Practice. It was The Practice. Boston Legal is after that. Yeah, you're right. The Practice. Yeah, you're right.

Wow, this really is…

Sorry, Ms. Mannheim.

This is like brand new news. I don't know why I'm so shocked by this, but yeah, that is tough. Sorry, Chris. You would have been a great choice, but unfortunately- I know.

I actually felt bad for him. But then I remembered that this is a show about watching people's dreams die. I was like, So much is happening in season one. Yes.

Also, I have to say, I know that Chris feels like he is the perfect, you know, Flynn writer. I got to say, if I'm going to choose anyone from Bravo, I'm going to choose Joe Bradley, the Southern Charm version, not the below-deck version. Right? I think, I think we got to say it's, it's a Joe Bradley role.

I don't remember the man in that movie. I just remember the check because she was great.

I just love that movie. That's all I'm saying.

I don't remember the guy doing much. I mean, whatever. The check had so much- Congratulations. I was like, Can you spare a little? It's time for It's time for a crap and commercial.

I'm surprised they were able to even make a whole movie out of that. I always love Rapunzel as a fairytale, but I always felt like it was a bit one-dimensional. It was like, Oh, she got She got her hair put up in the tower. She grew her hair out. She let it down. He climbed up. Then I'm always like, How did they get down from there? Once he climbs up the tower, isn't he just stuck in the tower also?

It's like hangnail, I guess. You get a nail and you hang it, and then you loop your hair around it. You could use it as a both-way a thing.

You cut off the hair and then tie it to something in the tower.

No, you don't cut off the hair. No, you don't cut it off. I remember I saw the movie, but I just… I don't remember that much.

Don't cut off the hair.

Yeah.

Come on.

It sounds like a gross live-action movie, though, because in cartoons, the hair looks cute. You know what I mean? It's like, Oh, my God, it just says long. But hair that that's long in real life is just not cute. It's all damaged and issues. There's probably bugs living in it. It's going to be an awkward live-action movie. I'm just saying right now. They're going to be like, Cameron Mannheim's son was disgusting trying to manhandle all that hair. Cameron's going to be like, Damn it, we worked so hard for this. We should have let the Vanderpump kids' rules, Venderpump Rules Kids take it. Oh, God.

According to Google AI, it says, In the classic Brothers Grim version. The Rapunzel story ends with the witch banishing Rapunzel to the wilderness, where she has twins and her prince blinded by thorns after jumping from the tower. See, that's what happens. You can't get back down. He had to jump out of the tower. Finds her by voice and the tears of her joy heal his sight. So basically, she was in the tower.

Now we saw him to the woods.

I know. I was like, Isn't this just into the woods? I think Google AI messed up because I'm like, She was in the tower, and then her mom was like, Fuck you. Get out of my tower. I was protecting you. Now you're going in the wilderness. Enjoy your kids. You got knocked up. You got knocked up.

You're a little slut daughter. Rapunzel's like, I'm on OnlyFans, guys, now.

So I've been kicked out of my tower, and I'm just on OnlyFans, and then you sign up, and she's not even showing anything.

She's braiding her hair. You're like, What the fuck, Rapunzel?

I didn't promise you anything.

Okay, so we're hearing... So we're watching the boys make this Mother's Day video. They're now jerking each other off while Jason tells us, Yeah, when we first got here, it was bad. We were living in our fucking cars. Chris is like, Yeah, dude. My Volkswagen, Jetta. Oh, God, right there. Just get the nuts a little. All our clothes were in trash bags. Jason's like, Yeah, I was using trash bags and clothes as warmth at night and your body heat. And honestly, bro, I was just getting sick of ramen noodles and fucking cat food.

Oh, God. I forgot. I forgot about this detail. Well, first of all, it's also funny using your trash bags and clothes as warmth at night.

And you and your body heat. These two. I mean, can I sign up? Where do I sign up again? I'm willing to go back.

Then Jason tells us, Yeah, man, when I got here, I was trying to eat clean, and I didn't have any money to do it, so I was eating cat food. Really? The producer's like, What does cat food taste like? And have you seen Great Gardens? He was like, Tastes like canned tuna, the one you get at Ralph's. You mean not the one you get at Bristol Farms? Not the one you get at Eruan. He's like, Honestly, shout out to them. I was shredded. I love that that's what he prioritized. He was like, I don't have enough money for anything. I'm scraping things by, but got to look good, which honestly, it's LA, so I actually... That is the journey for many actors.

I mean, it worked. The cat food stock just went I just imagine so many queens in this town, especially, being like, You know what? He did it. I can do it. Cat food it is.

Cat food it is. Unfancy feasts.

Yeah. No. Oh, sorry. Go ahead.

That was you going to say that. They're doing this photoshoot with their manager, which is funny, this random girl. Jason's like, Chris and I were just trying to figure out how we're going to make money faster. I see all these social media people, and I'm thinking to myself, How are they going to make money like this? I'm Do we need a backstory for why you decided to join OnlyFans? I think it's pretty obvious.

You're on. Okay, it's an option. You took it. We get it. Meanwhile, they come at the same time, which is really impressive. Jason's like, Yeah, subscribe if you want to see Justin Fox's page. Chris is like, Yeah, like and subscribe if you want to see Axel Stone's page. Oh, God. Italian Stallion 3. Yeah, find me. Italian Stalion I love that you're in Italian Stallion 3. Listen, it's hard enough getting into the live-action tangled being Italian Stallion 1, you know? But three?

Yeah. Also, I just looked up Axel Stone, and it's actually a street fighter character. I was like, You named your porn name after Streetfighter? Of course, he did.

Wait. Who's-who's-say it?

Who was that? Axel Stone. That's Chris.

Chris is... What didn't he say he's Italian Stallion? Oh, no, you're right. Yeah, he says this.

But I just like, there's actually another Axel Stone. There's also another porn star named Axel Stone. This is what I'm discovering as I'm looking here on... I did Axel Stone OnlyFans, and all sorts of fascinating things have shown up.

But wait, I just looked up Italian Stallion 3, and this is not him. This is some guy who just had a baby. He's like, Hey, I'm Italian Stallion 3. So wait, who's he saying to follow? You need to get better at this. I'm trying to get a boner, guys. Who's this Italian Stallion 3? Okay, what's his other name? Axel Stone, page.

Axel Stone with no E, I suppose. I don't know. Maybe there's an E.

Axel Stone.

Naked. I'm going to look up Justin It's Justin Fox, Justin Fox Only fans. Let's see if anything shows up.

Yes, view profile. It's sensitive. Are you sure you want to look at it? Yes, I'm sure. Oh, yeah. Okay. It is Axel, the Stone. You see, they're not even getting… But it says, Axel the Stone hasn't posted. Do I need to subscribe?

I will say I looked up Justin Fox, who is Jason, and I said Justin Fox Only Fans, and I did not find anything particularly good there. But there is another Justin Fox, who is a porn star, and he is quite impressive, I will say. Good for you, other Justin Fox.

This one is like Justin with a Y and two Xs.

There's a Justin Fox who comes in taking nude photos of himself in the airport, like airplane bathrooms. He's doing great work. He's this big beefy guy. Good for him.

Yeah, I can't find him. Okay, we'll have a full at least X breakdown in one of these days. So he's like, yeah-We'll do it at lunch.

He's like, Yeah- We'll do it at the South Beach. We'll do it at the South Beach.

Yeah, we'll do it at the South Beach Food and Wine Festival.

We'll put it up on the screen. Yeah, we'll put it up on the screen.

Hell, yes. Jason's like, Yeah, people were hitting me up on Instagram, left and saying, You should do OnlyFans. Then all of a sudden, it was just like, eureka. Chris was like, Jason started OnlyFans before me. I just saw how much money he was making, and I wanted to make as much money as we could, so we did it. Now, they're in Leopard underwear, and they're going, Happy Mother's Day. It's so stupid.

Did you mention this line from Chris? I may have been looking at OnlyFans' pictures at this point, but did you mention this line when he said, Serving, you can make good money, but we were still in the hole.

Oh, God.

You got to really think about it.

You're still in it. You're literally in it in this scene. You're in it.

You are really showing it off. Okay, so, yeah, they're in the leopard until I see Happy Mother's Day. So their photographer/manager leaves, and then Jason goes, Okay, well, I got to study Shakespeare because I got my scene tomorrow. I was like, No.

Oh.

So amazing.

So good. So then we go to Shane getting dressed. He's like, Oh, yeah.

Wine for the lady, fruit punch for the man. That's how it's going to go today.

He's getting ready for a date, and he's telling us, In one point in my life, it genuinely was, Dude, how do we get late all the time?

I didn't care about the consequences of that. But you know what? Now I'm older, I've been humbled by life. Then it's more like, How do we tell the truth, but still get a needs, not needs, Matt. Yeah, bro. Shane Davis, baby.

Yeah. You are still thinking, How do we get late all the time? You're just saying, Now I'm not I'm not going to lie about it. By the way, in this scene that happens, he literally lies to get late. Lies about it.

Yeah.

He goes, Women that have sexual needs too. I'm here to fulfill them.

Yeah, baby. This girl, Kristin, arrives and he's like, Hey, sorry, my dog didn't go crazy for a second.

She's like, It's okay. I love dogs. He's like, Yeah, Kristin's an absolute baddie, and I met her on set. What set was it? It doesn't matter. When you're a model, all the world's a set. I'm hyped up that she's finally back in a dating pool because I think the situation Natalie made me insecure.

Got all these guys leaning into like, Now I'm insecure. I'm vulnerable. It is hilarious. This is such a 2026 version of this show. It's amazing. We see two weeks ago, Natalie being like, You showed all your cards. It's making me bored.

So now he's like, And now I'm just going to have a couple of solid dates after all this confusion just to get my mojo back. Yeah.

He's like, Oh, my God. How did I get this soap? Oh, yeah. It's a twist-up, baby. It's a twist-up of the wine.

This time of my life, I was wondering how do I take a cork out of a bottle, but now I'm all about the twist off.

Hope you don't mind. I'm going to have some fruit punch, okay? She's like, Okay.

She's like, Sorry, started drinking without you.

What have you been up to? It's like, Most of the screen writing, you know how it goes. I got my life story, which I'm working on. It's pretty much the whole fucking thing because I got shot when I was young. I was paralyzed. I had to learn to walk shit. Maybe you've heard about it. Probably not because my story is not out yet. Biopic, baby.

I'm calling it 8 Mile 2.

So 16 Mile?

I didn't get it.

She's like, Wow. Can I see your gunshot wounds?

Yeah. Look, I put bandage on them fun gunshot wounds. I always know where they are when I'm pressing check.

Oh, God.

It's on my half-titty.

Then he tells us, Yeah, I've got a problem, trauma dumping, but you know what?

I'm an over-shawer, but using those gunshot wounds as a lure to show off the hard work I've been putting on half-titty. Not a bad idea.

Yeah, I got this one in high school, and I It's the devil reaching for hope. That's my hope tattoo. The devil reaching for hope.

Wait, so the devil... You're saying the devil is trying to take hope or the devil is actually trying to find hope? The devil is trying to be hopeful right now.

I like that the devil really just wants to be He's like, Oh, God, please. The hope. It's like, No, stop.

This is a reminder that you have to have. I'm assuming it's like, This is a reminder that you've got to keep hope alive because otherwise, the devil is going to take it away from you. Therefore, I've got a tattoo on my shoulder in case I forget to have hope.

What an absolute fucking tool. I love it. She goes, Wow, I love it.

He's like, Yeah, yeah. I want to make out.

Then he gets a text, and it says, Here. She goes, Oh, a text from someone named Karina, huh?

He goes, Oh, that's my fucking sister. Let me text back, wait in your car. Or I'm telling mom.

She's like, I want to fuck you. Well, you have a weird relationship with your sister.

That's just the way we talk. That's it. That's fine. Anyway, you got to go. Got to go. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.

She's like, Look, I don't care. I'm with somebody, but I don't care as long as they're up front.

He goes, Yeah, right. Yeah, that's pretty good. Okay, get out of here before she Okay.

Yeah. Ethical non-monogamy is making sure up front that a woman knows that your intentions are not for exclusive commitment. Kristen is dating other people, and she's cool with it.

I'm like, Ethical non-monogamy, what you're describing is just guys being like, so this is not a thing, right? So we can see other people. That's not ethical non-monogamy. That's just you having your cake and eating it, too. Low carb, of course. Yeah, I guess.

I know you got to get to that concert.

And she's like, what concert?

I got you tickets. Here's your concert. Go. Have fun. Bye.

But we are definitely seeing each other again. All right. Have a good one, and come in Karina.

Now, please It's literally like watching Colbert or something like that. Okay, and now coming to the stage is Karina.

Yeah, someone else who looks exactly the same. Same girl, different tattoos. The producer says, You're seeing multiple people, but you're very transparent.

Mm-hmm, that's right. That's a good monogamy, mother Chucker.

Okay, but then why didn't you tell Kristen that Karina was coming? He's like, Oh, yikes.

I can't really say it. I just can't say it.

Come on, man.

He's like, Have you been good, Karina? She's like, Mm-hmm. What about yourself? He's like, I'll be all right.

Then he leans in and just starts to kiss.

He's like, Want to watch a movie? Let's watch something scary. Let's watch the ice score. I'm like, Oh, scary. Sigony Weaver. And Shana's like, Look, Karina loves movies. I have the best VHS collection upstairs. Don't have a VHS player, but I have a collection. So what I do is I hold one I'm on one hand and one the other.

I do a little puppet show with the VHS as puppets.

It's so good. We got five minutes into it, then we just bone.

Yeah, Karina's really into the first five minutes of movies. Oh, yeah. That's so stupid.

Now we go to Angelika's apartment, and Audrey comes over, and Angelika's like, Bro, literally standing up just now.

I like, I'm like, You He finally felt it. I got my back blown out in the worst away by a man yesterday.

Yeah.

A word of silence for my vertebrate. Not going to lie. At the end of it, he was like, Oh, by the way, I just want to be honest. I did cut off the girl I was talking to, and I was like, Okay. And then after telling me this, he tried to kiss me, and I was like, I just don't want anything to do with Jason. Not going to lie.

She's like, Let's go over my history with Jason. We flirted for a full day, and that was super cute. Then he made out with another girl. Then he invites me to a place and doesn't show up. Then we do a weird day where he injures me. Can we just move forward from this situation? Like, What the fuck, bro?

So, Audrey is like, Did he tell you about his other job?

Their OF? She's like, Only Dan's?

They really got so well on this show. I was just like, Yeah, you didn't know about it?

She's like, What? That's another red flag. What is the content?

She's like, I don't want to know. I'm so desensitized to OnlyFans because ever since I've had a phone, I've known what it was. I won't say I've never thought about doing OnlyFans, but you can express yourself how you want and make a lot of money and then fuck off to Europe and marry a prince. I don't know if they would want anyone who does OnlyFans, but you know what? They wouldn't have to know. I love this narrative that she has for herself that you do OnlyFans for enough money to then fly off and marry into royalty. Yeah.

I think it's harder than people make it sound OnlyFans, because everybody's on it. I think you're out there wheeling and dealing and hustling. I think I told you this, but at my niece's high school, there was a mom doing OnlyFans, and she wrote on the back of her car with paint on the window when people do that, just graduated. But instead of that, it said OnlyFans, and it had her QR code. She was getting in trouble because all the dads were sitting in the carpool line and going to her OnlyFans. You have to work it.

Yeah. It's this competition out there. It's really very difficult. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

So, Audrey is like, Can I tell you a funny story? Chris and I were hanging out after our surf I'd been drinking, and he goes, Do you want to just stay at my place? I was like, Sure. I mean, it was like PG 13. But in the morning, I needed a shower. So he's like, Second door to the right. I go to the shower, and there's like, Do you know what a penis pump is?

She's like, What does that entail?

She's like, Yeah. I don't know. To get an erection or erectile dysfunction or something.

She's like, Oh, my God. Poor thing.

She says, Yeah, but it was staring me down. Then we see, Don't we see Isn't this where we see it? They show us a picture. Okay, so not only is it the penis pump, it's also a big rubber poussaisai that's in there. Did you notice the big rubber butt thing?

The jerk-off toy? I saw that. Well, I was wondering if… Because I feel like I saw the pump because I saw the thing. But then I saw the… Yes, I saw the flesh… What's it called?

The flesh pump. I don't know. I just call it a fake poussaisai. What else do you call it?

The flesh pump, the flesh You know, the flesh thing.

It's called the flesh. I don't feel lazy for stuff like that, honestly. Like all the-Sexy. The gadgets and the things. That's too much. But yeah, I noticed what it was. It was like, no, it's not a fleshlight. I know what those are. A fleshlight is different. It looks like a flashlight, but this was like a butt. It looked like a little butt.

Maybe what I thought was a fleshlight was the penis bump. Then I did not see the... Because I've I do know that there are those butts that you can fuck.

It's like a but and a pouce-se. That's in there, too. She's like, Yeah. I was staring me down. I was like mid-Oh, she's like, Yeah, it was staring me down. I was like mid-shampoo. Me and the penis pump, locked eyes. I was like, Hey. It was like, What are you doing here? I was like, What are you doing here? I was So he sees her in the hall and he goes, Hey, I thought you were in my bathroom. And she's like, I was. And he goes, No, that's not my bathroom. That's Jason's bathroom. She's like, Oh, my God.

So I just want to point out- She ask Jason. This stuff is in the public bathroom that's in the hallway for the guests to use. And it seems like this will be an issue because the previews for next week, they're doing a photoshoot, and Angelika says, 3, 2, 1, say, Penis Pump. Then it looks like Chris gets mad at Audrey because why are you making fun of the Penis Pump? Then, Audrey gets mad at Angelika. Why would you say that? Why would you out that? But I'm like, This Penis Pump is in the public bathroom of your apartment. And also, you're on OnlyFans.

Well, it's Jason's bathroom.

But still. But it's Jason's bathroom. But she said, I went down the hallway. The implication of the bathroom is public facing. That's gold.

So Angelika is like, Eeu, eeu, I need to shave my ears and grow new ears.

I wish I was a starfish because they can regrow their ligaments.

She's like, I want to cut off my ears, but then I want them to grow back again. So then Angelika just lying there. She's like, My knees and back hurt a lot. It was like, My neck, my back, my pussy, and my crack, they are out of commission right now.

Well, yeah, that's two out of three things that he had in his bathroom.

So, Andrew is like, Well, we're going to the Abbey tonight because we just want to gross out all the gay people who are just trying to have a fun time. That's just going to be like, fucking dancing. Yeah, that's a straight place.

Like, shake Now at the Abbey, Audrey's there with Mary Faith and Parker, and they're talking about Venus bringing his sister. Then Natalie comes, and... I don't know. It's just like, Hello, hello, hello, hello. Then the boys come, Chris comes, and he's like, Whoa, I'm big on charcuterie, guys. And Audrey's like, I'm obsessed with people ordering for me, so go for it.

It's like, Oh, yeah, you're in good hands with me. I know my way around charcuterie. I just made some for my mom and then jerkt off all over it. Then, it's on my next video. Venus has a sister, Savannah, and he's like, Savannah is my youngest sibling, and she is, in my eyes, just perfect in every single way. But you want to know a little bit of dirt on Savannah? She hooked up with Peter once. Yeah, that Peter. Savannah, what the fuck were you doing? She's probably like, Thanks. Thanks for unnecessarily telling America all about that. I'm not a cast member on your show. Okay, I'm already mortified.

Meet her as Peter, and he's catching strays in every episode. Then Angelika and Peterson, Angelika and Jason hang out, and she's like, My back hurts. He goes, What is it? From Jujutsu? Is it from Jujutsu?

She goes, Yeah, because you were rough. It's like when I stand I feel this electric shock, and it shoots down my whole spine. It's scary.

He goes, Yeah, you should go to a chiropractor. Yeah. She's like, You should send her to a fucking chiropractor. You backblower.

She said she's getting an MRI tomorrow. He's like, Yeah, it's probably just a pinch nerve. It happens to me all the time. Oh, you ordered food? He shows up. He's somehow thrown off by this. He's like, Do you have any friscus in that? Any fancy feats? And she's like, Yeah, I think actually Chris ordered it. He's like, Hell, yeah. I'm just in pain.

So, yeah. Okay.

I'm just, I can't really stand. Yeah.

So. Yeah, well, damn. I want to eat that, but I can't have cheese because I'm not a cheese guy. God. What do you want? I'll put some on the plate for you. Like, fucking Bacchee Onassis.

I'm just trying to give you a lot of hands that I don't want to talk anymore. So I'll get it. He goes, They need forks.

Yeah.

Okay, I really can't talk about charcuterie logistics with you anymore. It's driving me nuts. I just want to tell you something.

I just really like you, and I think we might be better off as friends.

I just feel a little overwhelmed.

When you tried to kiss me, it made me, I don't know.

I just like, I don't know.

But I feel like, I don't know.

I just think that like, can you walk away now? Because I can't walk away.

Okay, okay. Well, I'm totally cool with being friends, I guess. I hope your back feels better. And so he tells us, Deep, deep down, I'm I could feel my ego trying to cover it up and be like, Jason, don't act hurt. But we just had a date, and I had a chance to show her who I am when I was on top of her and she was pinned to the ground. Now it's just all cut off. Like, all the feeling in her feet, probably. God, what a wuss.

Sir, you did show her who you were. You had three chances, too.

That's why she's leaving.

You blew her off the first night. You were a no-show the second night. The third time, you tried to kiss her while also giving her back injuries.

Yeah, so he tells Chris that he got dumped. Chris is like, Whoa, bro, she's playing games. She's playing games, bro. He gets way too mad. You guys are weird. Just date. I know this is frowned upon, but you're too mad and it's creepy.

Then he's like, I mean, they just had a jiu-jitsu class, and apparently she can't stand up, but she walked her ass over here. It's like, well, she can walk. She's not an invalid now, but her back fucking hurts.

She's not moving a chair with a straw on her mouth. She's just a total fake, according to him. He's like, Yeah, I don't know. I don't know her, but she's got weird fake energy. I can't really tell her motives. What are her motives? She just dumped him. It's not like she's playing games with him. She said, I don't like you, and she left him. That's not a game.

The one who's acting squirly is Jason. He's the one acting crazy. Then he's the one who's upset that she broke things off with him when he was the one who was like, You're clingy, and I don't want to talk with you anymore. Then decided… That already Then on top of that, he decided he did want to talk to her, and then he blew her off. It's crazy.

Then Chris says, She actually sent Jason a picture of her at the gym the other day after jiu-jitsu. She's full of shit. That's what she is. She posted, honest from my Instagram last night.

She was like, Here's a picture I supposedly texted him. It's from my Instagram.

Yeah. Then in comes Shane. He sits down with Angelica.

He's like, Hey, what's up? How are you? Nice. You're a kiddoy man. Why's your cat food on it?

Angelika's like, Yeah, you look really good tonight.

He's like, Oh, damn. You look really good tonight. What's going on over here? You want to sit down? Oh, you're already sitting down. That's so cool. How convenient. I'll sit down, too.

He's like, Yeah, because I see you, but I don't get to talk to you. I was like, Yeah, I was a little worried about coming at you just because at first I was like, I don't know what she's feeling. But why didn't you say hi? Because I just didn't step on Jason's toes because he needs those toes. He's pretty short. He needs to stand on them. You know what I mean?

She goes, His tiny little toes. You don't want to hurt his tiny little feelings. His tiny little super small.

He says, I always thought Angelika was hot, but I thought she was really madly in love with Jason.

Bro code's super important, but the chemistry is just happening right now. Sorry, Bro code. Sorry, Bro code.

I think you're hot, but I also don't know you. He's like, Yeah, you don't need another ex. That's all there is to it. Do you like movies? Period.

Period with a T at the end, and that's all I want to know.

He's sitting down and he's like, Oh, my God. Look, look what's happening behind us. Look what's happening, you guys.

I was just like, Oh, my God! I'm pretty sure it's been 0. 5 seconds since she was talking to Jason. I mean, girl, we do not have to homie hop. We can do a homie walk. I'm like, No, that's just 0. 5 seconds since she broke up, but she wasn't talking about Jason for a while. Then Shane is like, Yeah, I'm in this weird space where I'm trying not to get too attached to anything.

It's a weird space called the past 10 years of my life, probably.

Yeah, so you're just trying to fuck everything with a pulse? Yeah, check, check, check.

Okay, well, let me see if you got a pulse. Wait, you don't have a pulse, girl. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, she's dead. She's literally dead. God, this is fucking crazy. She's dead. She died. She died of the jiu-jitsu mascot. She's reanimated. Someone help me. Someone get her a steak. Put it through her hair. She's dying of me.

Chris is like, Oh, she's going to be petty? Well, I'm on a bud in. Angelika and Shane are like, he's got his arm around her in this booth. Chris comes up and he's like, Whoa, what's going on here? What's going on here?

Shane's like, I'm just having a conversation. Nice conversation. Angelika is like, Yeah, it's just two really nice, sweet people just trying to get to know each other.

Chris is like, Well, it's looking a little bit more than that, okay?

He's like, Yeah, well, this is how you and I sit. Okay? This is what we do.

Okay, bro. Well, good luck with her. Good luck with her. She goes, Oh, my God.

What the fuck does that mean? He's acting like he dated before. He wishes he dated me.

Chris did such a good job. Wow. Going in saying, Hey, what's going on? All right. Have a great night. Bye. Good luck. Like, wow.

Be careful with her. Be careful. What an ass. She's like, My God, did he just use his penis pump to come over here and cockbot me? Dun, dun, dun.

That was pretty good. That was a good line. Chris is like, You know, this pisses me off because obviously, Jason is my fucking best friend. Shane's my boy.

Is Shane going to do Jason dirty like that?

But when it comes to bro code, you just don't do that shit, man.

Yeah. Then, Venus is like, Yeah, I don't get that shit. I don't understand what's happening with that. Then everybody's all mad about this thing. Angelika's like, Oh, my God.

Hope I ate enough so the tequila doesn't take over the situation. He goes, Let it take over, baby. Let it take over.

She's like, Oh, my God. Put the tongue away. He's like, Sorry, I can't. You keep pulling it. The fuck it. She's like, Oh, God. I hope your pull-up game is great. I'm like, Whoa.

This is really escalating I said, Fuck that, bullshit.

Let's have some fun.

So now everyone goes to dance, but they're all mad. So they're like, We're dancing because we're mad now.

We're going to get our anger out on the dance floor.

So they're dancing, and he's like, You look so good.

She's like, You're so disarming. I appreciate that. This is part of that Riz that you have with all the girls, right? Riz.

He's like, God.

People.

They see that everyone else is dancing, so they go join I'm going to join them to dance. And then Marcus goes to check out if Jason's okay. And Chris is like, Dude, he's fine, bro. Leave him alone. He's like, I don't give a fuck. And Natalie's like, I dodged a bullet right there. Dun, dun, dun. So what's going to happen? And then it ends with Marcus going, What a whore.

And then those two. And then Shane and Angelika Kiss on the dance floor, which is pretty quick. But you know what? I support Just because Jason was a fucker, and he deserves to.

They supported it, too. They weren't dating. Come on, give me a fucking break. How many times is that guy going to stand her up? So stupid.

Exactly. What a horse.

Shut the fuck up, Marcus. Idiot. I'm glad to know that this show is just going to keep idiotic men at the forefront. Exactly. Because I love ragging on idiot men. But good Lord.

So fun. Well, thank you, everyone, for being here for this extraordinarily long episode. We will catch you with some Southern Charm later today. We got so much content still to come this week. There's so much. Thanks for being here. Get your tickets for the Golden Crappies. Don't forget about ad-free Watch What Crappens available on our Patreon. We will catch you on the next episode. Bye, everyone. Bye. No. He he. Watch What Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. It's always a party on Allison block.

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