Transcript of #3150 Vanderpump Rules S12E04&05 Part One: Angelicas and Demons

Well, hello, and welcome to Watch What Crap ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker, and joining me today is my fellow OnlyFans creator. It's Roni Karem. Hi, Roni. How are you?

Well, hello. How's it going, baby?

It's going great. We are here today to talk about some Vanderpump Rules, the latest episode, and do a little catch-up on what we missed over the break. Very exciting today, today, here, over in the worlds of crap and it's because the presale has begun for the Golden Crappies, which are being held on February 27th in Los Angeles at the Fonda Theater. The presale is happening now on Patreon. Started at 10: 00 AM Pacific and going until 10: 00 PM Pacific. Then tomorrow, January ninth, at 10: 00 AM Pacific, the tickets go on sale for everyone. This is going to be an amazing show. If anyone came to our show last year, you know all about it. That is happening tomorrow. We're really, really excited. There will be live streaming, but those details are not sorted just yet. For right now, for people wondering about that, that will be coming. But of course, the best experience is coming and seeing it in person here in LA. We're hoping to have some great guests and great fun and singing and laughter and joy and hugs and Shadiness and all the great stuff. Also, we will be building out our ballot very soon.

In the meantime, keep an eye out on our social media because we're going to be asking you all for help remembering everything that happened over the past calendar year because it's a lot of stuff. I've been doing my best to write down notes on things as they happen and remember who broke up and who left what shows and who got to fight with what. But sometimes we get so wrapped up in it, it's just easy to forget that things happened. We will be soliciting your help on social media very soon. Keep an eye on it at watch what crap ends on Instagram. Yes. It happens on Twitter.

That's the news. It's a community event. Also, Ad Free is now live at Ad Free on Crap-ins is now live. For Ad Free, we are now with A-Cast. You get Ad Free through our Patreon. So go to Patreon, you'll see it right at the top there. It's another podcast feed next to the bonus feed. So once you're signed up for that, you can have your Ad Free arrive right in your podcast app. Just click, put it in my app, and it'll ask you what app you like to use, and it'll go right into your favorite podcast app. So thank you so much for everybody on Patreon. Patreon is also where you get our bonus episodes and videos, which we do every day. And those are released same day on YouTube. I mean, same day on Patreon, and then a week later on YouTube. So thanks to everybody for your support over there. And now, let's get to Vanderpump Rules. Okay. So, Vanderpump Rules. Wow. I'm still enjoying the show. I think it's very cute. It's not like the other show. I mean, people… I like that it's not really trying to even compete with the other show.

It still has Lisa, and obviously the restaurant, but it's not at all like the other Vanderpump rules. It's like it's a new thing, and I'm okay with that. I think it's cute and funny. What do you think?

I feel like it's great. I think this show is just... It just picked up and just started going, and I just feel like I've been with these people for a while now. I'm not spending my time saying, Oh, God, she's trying to be Stasi. Oh, he's trying to be Jack. Oh, they're trying to recapture the magic. To me, it just feels like a whole new thing, and it's a fun new thing. I'm into it. This has the same energy as Southern Hospitality Season 1, and that show's really good, too. I'm actually wrapped up in the dramas of the show. When I saw in the previews for this week's episode, that, Oh, Angelika, that was his face. Jason stood up Angelika yet again. I was like, I can't believe it. I was like, Whoa, I can't believe I literally just spoke to my TV like that. I'm obviously invested. I think it's really entertaining. I think I'm really curious to know how the broader community is feeling about it.

Well, you're going to have to ask the broaders. We missed an episode because we were on break. We are not going to recap that whole episode. I know it's a travesty, but you know what? There's 10 episodes this week. There's only so much we can do. But we do have to at least talk about it and go through it a little bit because things did happen on this show that need to be discussed. First of all, Venus Wrapped.

Venus Wrapped. I almost forgot. Roni reminded me before we started recording.

Right when we said, this isn't really trying to be the other Vanderpump rules. We do have somebody rapping, and we do have somebody who's going to be a DJ now, who, I don't know, I don't want to say doesn't deserve it, Because I don't know. I mean, look, I've played around with DJ software. That's my hobby, playing around with music and musical toys. I have my little DJ thing over here that I play around with. I don't think it's that easy necessarily, but still, people who are good DJs work really hard to do that. You see somebody who's like, Well, I'm going to DJ now. Then he puts on some Ray Bands, and he's like, See? I'm like, I have Ray Bands on, and I'm lifting my hands a lot. I don't respect you, sir. You haven't earned this. Where's your DJ school? Where's your-I just diploma.

Where's your Kyle Cooke tour poster? I think what's so funny to me is-Who have you stodged with?

Who have you DJ stodged with?

Dj Stajd. That's just his name. Dj Stajd.

Dj Stajd.

I just think it's so funny how they act like DJing at Sir is like doing a set at Coachella. I mean, they're just like, Oh, my God, I'm doing Sir. Doing Sir on Tuesday. This is something that James Kennedy would always act like, I'm actually performing at Sir on Tuesday. I got a gig at Sir. I'm like, There's nothing about Sir that makes me say, Oh, I can't wait to go to Sir to hear their DJ and dance below the crystal chandeliers and the strange-Coplish. Antiquities. It's like it doesn't-Yeah.

I'm just not- Where else are you going to DJ that's full of Flor de Lee and Iron gates?

Tell me. Would you like to sit on a stepstool? Then great. Do it at Sur and listen to great DJs. If you said Tau, DJing at Tau, I'll be like, Okay, that's cool. It's a famous nightclub. It's a thing. But I don't It's like being able to DJ in the presence of Natalie. I don't know why they get so excited.

Yeah, they sure are, though. They're very excited. That's Marcus's big thing. And Venus, is a rapper, we find out, because he's hanging out with his friends, and Natalie's like, Oh, my God, I want to hear you rapping. That would make us all feel better because Venus is still upset over fighting with Boringface. Tim.

Yeah, Cam and Marcus.

Boring face, crinkly hair, and Marcus. He's so really upset. She's like, You know what make you feel better? To do your rapping, like rap for us. He raps. Here it is. Bitch, you know I'm from Texas, sleeping on bitches like Nyquil, dunking on bitches like O'Neill, hair down my back to the Orange Hill. Yeah. I'm cutting off bitches all year, standing on business because I know that I got it. Everything that I do is fucking iconic. Sailing this ship like I'm some fucking pirate. No, I'm not Peter, bitch. I'm from the revamp.

So was he saying that he's saying he's not Peter, like Peter from Van der Pump Rules, Peter Pan because of the pirate?

No, I think he's calling out Peter. But yeah, I mean, it is a mixture.

It's like a… It's wordplay. I I mean, I don't know. Would I necessarily bring this in as a demo to, you know, Rockefella? Maybe not. But would I maybe submit this for the next season of selling selling Sunset. Yeah. Possibly. It could be good selling Sunset interstitial music because- I'm a girl.

A girl with shoes. Shoes that are expensive.

Yeah, because it sounds ridiculous coming out of Venus's mouth, but you put a sassy lady and a cool beat like a… You have a, Bitch, you know I'm from Texas, stepping on bitches like Nyquil, dunking on bitches like O'Neill, hair down my back like Orange Hill. Yeah. And then it's just like Chrischelle walking into a coffee shop. That works for me.

Okay. We'll see. He won something because all I thought… At the end of this, I was like, If I had to describe this wrap to somebody, and they said, What was the wrap about? I would say, Cut your hair.

Just got it. I mean, no, it's a bad rap. It's not good. But that's what I'm saying. I would buy it in the world of selling Sunset. Maybe it's like, they'll bring back Christine, and they'll have Venus wrapping over Christine. You know? That works.

Yeah, I think that works, too. But do you think James Kennedy was at home cutting his inner thighs? I don't.

Yeah. He may have been, but just not for that reason.

Yeah. So that was that. It was horrifying, but in a cute… In a cute like, Oh, kids just so open to failing publicly. Dreams. Yeah. It's so fun. One of the most fun things about this show is watching people's dreams die slowly. It's like you get a whole decade to just watch dreams wither away and die. It's heartwarming. It feels good.

It's great.

Yeah, it feels good. It's like spiritual vampireism, and I'm into it. That happens. Then Boring Face, Crinkly Hair. What's her name again? Kim. Kim. Decides to have a girls' day, even though she doesn't really seem to be very girls' girl, but Whatever. Okay. She's going to have a girls' night.

She's not someone I look to and say, Hey, there's a fun person. There's someone who wants to do something fun. Here's someone who wants to arrange a lot of people together and have a social experience that's fun. But she decides to do it anyway. She invites Natalie, even though she doesn't like Natalie because she's like… She says something along the lines of inviting Natalie is better than not inviting Natalie and having her lose her mind. She invites Natalie, but then she's like a And then Natalie comes on the bus, and Natalie's trying to make amends and everything, but Kim just won't have any of it. Natalie can't deal with it because Natalie clearly wants to close this tab. And Kim is the type that's like, No, no, I need my moment.

It's It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

So they all go down to Orange County. I don't know why they go all the way down to Orange County because they- Why do they go to Orange?

No one parties in Orange County. Why is that a thing they're trying to make the audience believe is a thing? Nobody gets a party bus to go to Orange County. What the fuck are you doing in Irvine? Tell me.

Yeah, this is clearly the bar was like, We'll give them free drinks and we'll provide the party vans, so Bravo doesn't have to pay for it. They're like, Done. Because this group is not going down to Orange County to party. They're going to Sunset Strip. I'm sorry. They're going to go bull riding. They're going to Saddle Ranch. We all know it. But they decided to go down there.

Let's drive two hours in a party van with people we hate to have shots at some weird Mexican restaurant, three blocks from the beach. What the hell?

Yes. So Natalie can't deal with the tension with her and Kim. So she's like, Hey, I just want to say thank you so much for bringing me on this trip. It's really fun. If you want to talk about things, we can talk about. Kim's like, I don't want to talk about it right now. Yeah, but why don't you want to talk about it right now? We're going through a lot. It's a lot right now, and I just feel like we should talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. Why are you talking about it right now? Then Natalie basically loses her mind because Kim doesn't want to talk about it, and then she just like… She spins out.

Yeah, and then Angelika tries to come up and calm it, and she's like, Maybe you're going to talk about it later. And then she pushes Angelika. Angelika is like, Okay, you don't need to push me right now. And so that becomes the thing. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Angelika hooks up-ish with… Or Well, not really, because it was like she wanted to, but it didn't happen.

Because where we had previously seen when there was that fight on the rooftop where Venus was like, I fucking hate Gabby, and she's like,. Angelika and Jason had been flirting all day long and having this cute little moment, and everything was lovely and great. But then we find out in last week's episode that after the pool top fun and flirtation, they all went to Barney's Beanry. When they got there, Jason ran into this girl that he used to hook up with. He wound up like, he's like, Oh, I'm just going to go say hi to her. Then he sat with her, and then she sat on his lap, and then she was all over him, and her arms were all around his neck. Angelika was like, What the well as she should have been. She's like, Well, fuck this guy. She left. Then Jason went. By the way, as you can tell, I got very invested in this entire storyline, and I'm still invested. Jason then went, and in response, he unfollowed her on Instagram, which I'm like, What the fuck? I feel betrayed because you love Little Eyebrows so much. I felt like this was...

I was like, Little Eyebrows, you were supposed to be the sweet one, and you're doing some fuckery here. On behalf of Ron and I will not stand for this. But so he's doing this. So he unfollows her, which I think is crazy. You're unfollowing her, and then he just... He keeps... This guy gets dumber and dumber every episode. Is he low-key turning into the villain of the season? Because he's like, Yeah, that's just the way that I deal with it. That's just how I had to protect myself. It's like, What the fuck are you talking about? You were the one who was going after this girl, and you brought her to this place, and then ignored her to go make out with someone No, sir. Then he's like, Can we have a talk? They go out to this little bench that's in the back alley, and they're sitting there, and they have this whole conversation, and she's like, Yeah, well, it was weird because you were all over another girl. He's like, Yeah, but that's where I would have wanted you to step in and be like, Hey, that's my man. I'm like, What? You're blaming her for it?

I couldn't, Roni.

I was like- He wants to be fought for, Ben. Okay? He wants to be fought for.

I heard that this is a thing The thing actually with Gen Z guys, that this is actually their vibe, is that they want to be... This was the issue on Love Island this last season, wasn't it? That the guys were not being very passive, and then they wanted to be wooed, right?

I mean, I don't know, but if I worked out that much, I would want to be rude. The problem is when you have a balance, right? There needs to be some imbalance in a relationship. Someone needs to be hotter than the other person so that they can always hold that over the person's head. And Then the other person needs to be richer or smarter or something, and then they can hold that over the hot person's head. Because that imbalance creates like, Okay, you're always getting hit on, but I'm paying the rent. There's some a balance in the unhealthy relationship, and that's what makes relationships work. I think if people are equally poor and equally hot, it's not going to work. I think that's what we're seeing here, because they both feel like they're both people who are fucking other people, first of all. She's still fucking her ex, we find out. She's still living with her ex and fucking her ex, but then expecting him… I don't know that she's expecting him not to. She just wants him to be honest. But there's this like, Well, you're flirting with someone. Yeah, but you probably went home and fucked your ex.

I don't know. She wasn't doing it in front of him. I mean, there's different ways that we can argue about it. She was up front. Right, she was up front, but he was up front, too. He didn't do it behind her back. He literally went and that girl sat on his lap right in front of her. So they're both- That's pretty That's in your face as a big upfront.

That's like you're sitting in the sixth row versus the first row. Yeah, right. You're up front, and then you're really in the middle.

You're literally up front. Yeah. There needs to be more of an imbalance. They're both equally hot and equally poor. I don't think it's going to work. But he is the ultimate in Wuss. I mean, this guy, so not Wuss, just… I mean, fuck boy, but I don't even know what it is because I'm not mad.

It's really not fuckboy. It's dumb. Just dumb.

He's just dumb, and he's self-involved, but also sensitive, but really only sensitive to his own needs, which is very Van der Puff rules, where she hurts his feelings. But then, so to make up for it, he text her at Girls Night, and he's like, Hey, I'm going to be hanging out at wherever, wherever Kyle Chan is. Tom Tom. Tom Tom. I'm going to be at Tom Tom, and I want you to stop by. That would be really cool if you stop She's like, Maybe. I mean, probably not. But... And of course, she does. And then he's not even there.

That's what we find out today. I was like, Are you serious? Because I was, first of all, I was mad of her that she even said yes. But one thing I really loved is that when he texted this very simple text of, We're going to go to Tom Tom's, he misspelled every word in it. I love she was so judgy about it because she read it out loud, and every time there was a typo, she would read it slowly and loudly for everyone. Hey, I'm like, I don't want to go to Tom Tom, right everyone? I loved her judging us about that just because he's such a fucker. He's like a real little fucker. Also, don't forget that when they were talking about things on their little bench, she asked, Are you in a situation, by the way? He's like, No, but I mean, I've got options. Shut up. She goes, I'm not an option. Who says that? You're trying to woo someone and apologize, and you go, I've got options. He is such a fucker. I did not see. I should have seen it coming because it's Van der Pump rules, but they made him seem like he was the sweet, young, innocent one, and he was going to be the good one.

Right away, he is like a five-alarm fire. And so I'm just It's hilarious.

I have options. She goes, Okay, well, I'm not an option. He's like, Wait, what? That hurts his feelings. He's like, I don't get it. I know.

But then she acts like an option the entire time. Because basically, they were Bro, bro, just invite her out. It's not over. Come on, bro, bro, bro. And so then he does it. And then I just... I mean, she just must be horny. I don't think that she should have gone and said yes, but she said yes. And I was massively disappointed in her. But by the way, that little scene on the bench ended with a fight, right? Because she was just like, Fuck you. After that options thing, it all went sour. Then I think he went, oh, because he goes, your energy is like a little clinging with me right now. You're the one who asked her to the bench. She's the one who decided not to hang out with you anymore.

Yeah. That's a mess. Then the other thing that happened was Venus broke up with Marcus. He's like, I've had it. He's like, Can we talk? Marcus is like, What you got for me, brother? He tries to get all cool. It's like, What you got, brother? He's like, Most of the men in my life have treated me like shit. I'm not Peter. I'm from the revab. Bitch. He's like, Okay, can we just take the bad wrapping out of it? Just have a discussion? He's like, Well, I've never had a straight friend. And you've been horrible to me. You've been worse than gay people the way that you've betrayed me. And you told everybody that I talk shit. Nobody should do that. I should be allowed to talk shit about you, which I have to say is true. If you're with your friends, you should be If you're with your real friends, you should be able to talk shit about people and trust that they're not going to go just tell everybody everything the second that they get mad at you. Who would be friends with trash like that? I wouldn't. I mean, is he bad for talking shit about everybody in the restaurant?

Sure. But it's his God He's given right to talk behind people's back. He pays taxes. Isn't that like, Sure?

Yeah. I've never worked in a restaurant, but I just have to assume that part of working in a restaurant is talking shit about everyone else at the restaurant, right?

Yeah. That's what you do. I mean, in life. What job is there that you don't do that? It's what you do. Yeah. I think he has a good point. He's like, Okay, maybe I overreacted to you and yelled at you and whatever, but for you guys to take all my personal gossip and then go spread and tell everybody is not cool. It's like very dangerous liaisons of you, and I don't appreciate it. Marcus is like, Whatever. They broke up.

They had a standoff, which is great, where he was like, All right, fine. Venus is like, You can go now. And he's like, You can go now. Yeah, why don't you go? You can go now.

No, you go. You can go now. Go, go ahead then. Go. And so then he does go. Marcus does go. And then Venus is like, Yeah, that's right. I'm I'm not going to stay here and text behind a pineline. I'm just going to walk around this. I'm just going to stand by this wall over here, even though I need to be inside. When you realize that what you've claimed is a ratty old parking lot and a bench, and Marcus gets to go back inside to the warmth and free cocktails.

So, fine man. It was a funny episode. Actually, also, it was funny the way it ended because Natalie was going back to Orange County. Natalie was having that freak out, and the girls all decided, Well, fuck We're going to have fun. They're all jumping on the mechanical bull, and they're all drinking, and like, Woohoo. Like, woohoo, girls. They're having the best time. It keeps cutting to Natalie. She started talking to her friend on the phone, and she didn't just see her at the table. The girls are swinging around on a bull behind her, and she's just like, I can't even believe it. I'm literally here crying. Worst night of my life. Why can't you hear me? Stop making me out. Try making me out to be the bad guy. What the fuck did I do? It's ridiculous. The show just ends with her in the middle of her ranting. The show's like, We I don't even care about what she's saying. It's just like, we'll fade to black.

I think my favorite part of the whole thing was it when she's like, Yeah. If you're working at Sir, you're like an artist. You're a talented person. We're all showing off our talents, acting, modeling, or singing, and then it cuts to her going… The show's so So stupid. Okay, so now let's go to the current episode, which is Season 12, Episode Fly, Episode 5, Seeing Red Flags.

So, speaking of flags. Let's go out to see what the surf is like. It's Chris and Audrey, and they're surfing. Got to say, I really enjoy Audrey. She's definitely a standout for me. The last episode, also, Chris and Audrey shared a kiss, I believe. I think that was their first kiss. They're surfing. Then, Venus is washing. For some reason, he's washing his car on some random street in LA, and he's acting like he's in a music video. He's on the hood. He's got short shorts on. I'm like, I was expecting to be like, Oh, and there's Natalie filming him, but he was just alone just with the camera crew. I'm like, What are you doing?

Real slow-mo, set Erica Jane in her... Erica Jane. It's very Erica Jane from this season. Then, we see Shane taking a shower, earning that money, earning that money. Lisa comes in and has a meeting with Natalie and Guillermo. She wants a progress report on Chris, and Guillermo's like, Oh, at the beginning, he was lost, but now I think he's great. He finally cracked Aperal Spritz's guys.

He figured out how to make them.

Yeah, we see him trying to figure out how to make an Aperal Spritz on the computer. He's like, I can't even find it. I can't even find Aperal Spritz. Where is it?

What's in it?

Why isn't this alphabetical? Lisa's like, Oh, well, the girls sure seem to love him. Then we cut to these tourist moms from Oklahoma in really bad dress bar and like, Wow, you're real cute, aren't you, honey? What's your name? Christopher? Only my mom gets to call me Christopher, ma'am. I could be your mom. I'm probably old enough. Yeah, Christopher. Good time, girl. He's like, Oh, my God, lady. Oh, my God. Number one fan on your OnlyFans.

That's me. He's like, I don't know. I think you're a little bit…

I got a little bit in four today. He got it in four.

He's like, I don't know, you're a little too young for me. Oh, you. Stop it. You look like you're 24. Now, back to present. Natalie is like, Well, somebody made a comment on social media that he is like a sex worker, some What do you think? What? A sex worker? Yes, a sex worker. Yes, a sex worker. Lisa tells him.

I love Lisa pretending she doesn't know what a sex worker is. She's like, Oh, what? A sex worker? What is this? Lisa, you run the biggest human trafficking spot on that block. Are we still pretending that you're not just running a human trafficking ring? Because I do not buy it, ma'am.

(laughter) So she goes, He's a sex worker. Pause. 3, 2, 1. Well, so am I. I mean, it's a fucking job when you've been married for 42 years. Get it.

What defines a sex worker exactly? On a scale of Lala to Lala. What do you mean? She's like, Oh, I don't know. Like a gigalore, somebody who works with his body or somebody She was making a comment that he was on the OnlyFans. I have no idea. I don't even know what the OnlyFans is. She's like, Oh, I don't know. Ciarma was like, Oh, there's nothing wrong with OnlyFans. Oh, you know what the OnlyFans is, do you?

Well, I heard about it. She goes, Oh, wow. Look at his phone. He looks guilty going there, Natalie. So Natalie is like, Well, what you do in your private life is none of our business as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. Even though it's none of our business, however, I will bring it up here literally at our business.

Well, I agree. I mean, we come from Europe, darling. Nobody wears any clothes in Europe anyway. I mean, for God's sake. Commercials.

Here comes one right now.

I have to say, one of our listeners, actually a couple of our listeners, thank you, thank you, boys, sent me links to eyebrows doing a nudy a massage video. Like a guy was massaging him nude, and there was Wiener and everything. I was like, That was pretty good. Hello.

Share the links. Hello.

I can't believe I didn't, actually. That really is shit. I'll send it to you in a second. I saw it and I was like, Oh, my God, is this what his OnlyFans is? I've never gone on OnlyFans before. Which, have you? I don't know. Is it so normalized that everybody's gone on it, or is it terribly embarrassing to have gone on it?

Here's what I've done with OnlyFans. I'll sometimes I'll be like, I'm so curious. I'll click on and I get to the page. And of course, then there's all these locks, pad locks. Like, Not a content. And I'm like, Oh, well. And I just turn around and go back. It's like, I see. It's like I drove to the store and saw it wasn't open yet. So I just turned around. I don't bother trying. I was like, I'm not paying money. I'm not paying money.

That's my experience with OnlyFans as well. I get to the locks, and then I look at the... It says Join, and it's like, $30 a month. I'm like, $30? You fucking That's more than Netflix.

I'm not doing that. For some reason, I always think that maybe this time when I go, there'll be free content, and there's literally never been free content. So I'm like, Oh, well.

There should be a clip. I mean, something, like a preview. Here's just a little bit of penis. I don't know. There needs to be something.

You have to go to Twitter for that. You go to Twitter, and usually people will be like, Here's what you can see, and you might see a tease or-Okay, well, I did.

So this is what I did. This was my journey. I went to the Twitter. That's where I first found him. And I mean, obviously hot. A little too waxed and worked out for me, I'll say. It's intimidating that much. And a little hair never hurt anybody, you guys. I mean, seriously, all you are are Razorburn. You know what I mean? You're not huggers. I'll tell you that, Shave Chest people. So I went on there and I was like, Okay, I'm going to go on the OnlyFans. So to get on the OnlyFans, I've never signed up. This whole thing is like national security. You have to put all of your shit in there. It's so embarrassing. I was so embarrassed that I did it, but I had to see eyebrows. I was like, I to see if that video is any indication, just for business, we're recapping this show, it's my duty. I was like, It's my duty to go. It's right off. Thank you. So, right off, you're right to it off. Right it. So I went over there and signed up, put my birth certificate in there, my passport, my social security, my-Oh, no.

Then you found out it was Lahrsa Pippin by accident. Oh, I'm so sorry, Roni.

No, but I did go in there, and it It was $11, which I found... I was like, $11? I wonder what he's doing for $11. Yeah, a month. I signed up. I was like, Okay, I'll give you my $11. So, go in there. It's just him shirtless or in a jockstrap. There is nothing in there. I can't believe that cost 11 damn dollars. I can get that for free on your Twitter, sir. I need more.

I had a feeling that he was not going to show any peen. I don't know why because I think he's a public- No, I did see it in that other video, But that other video wasn't on the OnlyFans.

It was from some other link.

Was that maybe before he was on Bravo? Maybe he scrubbed all the…

All the… Didn't get them all.

Anyway, my review of his OnlyFans, not enough for $11.

Listen, our Patreon can be $11, but you get videos, bonus episodes, ad free now. There's a lot of stuff. This is just you without a shirt. I mean, you get that to me every day on the show for free, sir. I I did not get a refund. I don't think he can get a refund. I'm sorry. He's too wax. Can I get a refund? So I didn't get a refund, but I did cancel it. But I was proud that my first OnlyFans moment was for eyebrows.

Yeah, I I also feel like, I also feel like you're not allowed to talk about doing OnlyFans on the show and be so proud of it. He's talking in a way of like, Yeah, so I did it. No, It was totally fine. We should embrace sex work and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. His vibe is like that. It's 2026. Let's not be so puritanical. You know what? I'm doing what I need to do to earn some money. If I want to show off my body, it's my right. There's no shame in it. That's his vibe. But if he's not being nude, then why are you co-opting the language for the people who are being nude, who are the ones who are doing something? Honestly, I would actually argue to say a little braver. A little braver because they're putting themselves out nude on the internet knowing that it could have repercussions for their careers later on. Now, one could say, this guy's doing something much worse by going on Vanderpump rules, which could have repercussions for the rest of his life for employment. But I just think people are putting themselves in a riskier position, and then you get to still talk as if you're doing something equally as risky when you're just showing photos of yourself in the same way that you're giving off for free.

So to that, this is a double fail for the eyebrows this week. Both the eyebrows are going down in flames.

It's interesting the way that you put it because you're right. I mean, it's such a puritanical place that we live, right? Where it's like OnlyFans, yeah, sex is great. Everyone has this free to be you and me sexual attitude, but you're right. At the end of the day, it's like, Oh, I'm a sex worker, but you just take off your shirt. It's this puritanical view of even sex work. You don't get to get the street cred. It's weird.

Yeah, he was claiming street cred for being a sex worker. It's like, you don't have any… You're actually just a rip-off at that point. You're a shirt-off-rip-off because you're getting money for people to see your shirtless, which is just what you're doing anyway.

But, good for you. I mean, if you can do it. No, I'm not going to say good for you. Yeah, I mean, good for you if you could do it, I say. I'm going to have an OnlyFans where just people pay me to put my clothes back on. I'll start with my Fupa out, and then people are like, Oh, my God, please, Roni, please. At least some underwear. I'll be like, $300. $300. I'll put on some underwear. Then until eventually, I'm just putting a bella clava over my face at the end. You know?

You know Denise Richards shows tits? Be great. So, eyebrows dropped out of the wear.

I do not like the word tits. Can we not? Boops.

She shows her bosom.

Yes.

She shows her brestacles.

She shows her brestacles.

But the point is that… Okay.

Well, I'm not enough of that. I get you. I agree. I'm just saying like… I need more. I need more for $11 is what I'm going to say. Now, then did I pray and ask for forgiveness and delete my OnlyFans and slap myself on the back with a whip. I did. I felt very terrible. But it was fun while it lasted. I mean, it wasn't really. It was a waste of money. But anyway, that happened. They're talking about him being a sex worker. They don't really care because we're it, sir. Then they're talking about this party that they're going to have, and it's for Guillermo because Guillermo is the Spanish George Clooney. She puts this picture up next to George Clooney, and they do look exactly alike. I've never realized that. Have you?

Yeah. Well, I just never thought about it very much. I don't spend a lot of energy thinking about Guillermo, I'm sorry to say, but they did actually look quite similar. He's produced a movie, and so they're going to throw a party for the movie's premiere, and so it's going to be a big event. All hands have to be on deck, all right? Natalie is... They start talking about second chances, and Lisa says that she's all about second chances. You know, Marcus seems to be doing better. Speaking of second chances, he wants to be a DJ alongside Mekana. I don't want to say no to anything to him right now because I feel like he's been struggling so much. Ever since I learned he was a broken bird all this time. It's just changed my entire attitude about him. So please, please don't let his wings be clipped any further. Let's put that little bird on the DJ table and raise the roof for far.

Well, when I thought he was just a well-adjusted, handsome person with everything going for him, I said, No, you won't have a chance. But when I found out that both of his parents had tragically perished and his wing was broken, I said, DJ broken bird, get up there. Get up there. Bleed all over the decks.

Put your broken wing on the turntable and spin, God damn it, spin.

Did you ever know that you're the wind that's not beneath my wings, which is why the bird crashed, broke its wing, and became a DJ?

You are the wind above my wings because you're grounded at the moment for your broken wings. To a remix.

You're like a broken bird, you'll never fly away. Don't you know where your sir is?

So Natalie, the I'm not a race. So Natalie is like, Well, let's see if he's any good because what is the next step he's going to ask you for? And Guillermo goes, To drive your car? No. He asked me that the other day. He said, Can I borrow your suit and this and that? And this that. And this goes, Yes. Can I borrow your suit? Is he aware that you're wealthy and he's not? You're George Clooney and he's George nothing. He's a broken bird, but there's even limits to that.

He's like the Pandora of Sir.

Oh, Pandora.

Pandora is just walking around in a vanderpump Pashmina behind her like, mommy, why haven't we seen Pandora trying to hang out with any of this cast yet? That's something that's missing. I like when they pretend they're friends with Pandora. They're like, oh, hang on, I'm here, I'm a wonderful Pandora. Then we see a clip of Pandora in the background and her mom's Pashmina like, aren't we having fun, girls? They're just all throwing their coats on Pandora's hands as they walk by.

I feel like Pandora is somewhere with a pashmina around her shoulders, holding a little wicker basket, going to a farmer's market, being like, mommy, we like these carrots. Then we go over to Gloss Nail Spa, which I felt so honored. I love Gloss Nail Spa. It's in Silver Lake, so it's not my regular nail spa. But when I am over there, sometimes my friend Jessica and I go to Gloss Nail Spa, and they do a great job. So unsolicited testimony from me. But Angelika is there with Natalie, and so they go in, they say hi, like, Oh, my God, you look amazing. And Angelika's like, Yeah, I wanted to look cute for you. So then we also see at the gym, Marcus and Shane Davis are working out, and Marcus is like, Hey, what happens when you drink 15 beers the night before, bro? What do you do? How do you work out like that, man?

That's your pre-workout, bro. So So back with the girls, we're going to have a cross-cutting scene. Girls versus boys. Natalie is like, Oh, my God. I'm getting red because it gives me confidence. I'm so tired of feeling sad and stressed. I'm over it. I'm over it..

And Jelga's like, Yeah, you've been sad. Yes, Natalie did push me at girls night, which was not okay. And we see flashback of Natalie doing that to her. But she goes, But then she called me the next day and apologized. So I'm just trying to give her some grace because clearly she's going through something. I'm like, Give her some grace. You're a black belt. I would have loved to have seen her just get that leg in the air. I don't advocate violence, but I do advocate mastery in a skill. And I would It would have been hilarious if she just got that leg up in the air. Brownhaster. Natalie's under the table, pinned.

I'm giving her some grace. Give her some mace. Come on. This is Vanderpump rules. I I think this is—and I thought this before I even knew what was happening in the episode because Angelika, just the way she talks and laughs, I was like, She's perfect for Shane because she's like, Oh, my God, I want to look good for you. She has a girl version of Shane's laugh. Once you see it, once you hear it, you will not unhear it. It's the same laugh, but a girl version. She goes, He he he. And he goes, He he he, ). It's the same. They even have three his.

So, Natalie's like, Let this be a lesson to everyone. If you want to invite me to girls' night and avoid a serious conversation, don't be upset when I crash out. So, Natalie then is telling Angelika that, I really would have loved after girls' night, for Kimberly to I'm going to say, Hey, I hope you're okay. Hope you're feeling better. We'll talk when I'm ready. And she sent me a receipt. A receipt. What the hell?

She's like, Yeah, the bill from the cowboy bar said, Hey, can you Venmo me for your stuff?

Girl, I was like, What? Both of you guys, honestly, I need to take a break, honestly. Take a beat. That conversation will be had when both of you are ready, but I'm here for you, girl. That's what I wanted to say.

Yeah. And so Angelika's working, but she's low-key stressed because I have to see Jason and I. So then we go back to the gym, and now Jason has joined Shane and Marcus, and he walks in with a gallon of water and a gallon of eyebrows. And he's like, Hey, guys. So they're talking about-Who's that stud? Who's that stud?

He's like, I know I'm dehydrated. And so Marcus is like, Yeah, well, you just missed us on the flatbed. You snooze, you lose. Yeah. He's like, Yeah, I got a half-titty, bro. I'm trying to grow that shit with my half-titty.

Jason's like, Can you grow half a tit? Honestly, it looks good, though, bro. It looks good. He's like, Yeah, my little titty is bigger than most titty, so at least I got that. My half-titty. It's pretty good, right? He's like, Yeah. How's the rest of the night, guys? Was Angelika pissed that I didn't show up after I invited her and wasn't there. This is where we find out that Jason didn't even show up to Tom Tom, where he made Angelika go after her three-hour journey from Orange County.

What is wrong with you? We had to sit and watch a whole scene while you and Marcus sat there like a beautiful mind, trying to figure out what to text Angelika to invite her out. They had this whole thing. It's like, they had tried all these different draps. We watched you do this whole thing. You finally sent misspelled. Then after all that, you don't even show up. You stood her up for your I'm sorry date? No, no.

No. During girls night, Jason texted me and was asking me to meet up with him at Tom Tom. We see that, and she goes, And they didn't even show up. What the hell? Then back at the gym, Marcus is like, Yeah, you could tell she was really pissed. She's like, Yeah, but I called her last night, and I was like, Listen, I'm really tired, and I got an hour ride home. I just worked all night. Boop, hung up. I was like, God damn. I mean, okay. Well, then text her and say, I'm not going to go after all. Hope you're having fun. The girl was in the car 19 hours, sir. She went to Orange County, back from Orange County. Back from Orange County. To another country.

She went to another country. You're like, I got an hour drive home. Well, then why did you invite her out in the first place? So Angelika is like… Yeah, he called me and was nonstop texting me about how he wants to take me dinner and I guess make it up to me in some way. That's giving mixed signals. Yeah, mixed signals because I don't necessarily want anything serious because I literally am getting out of my year and a half relationship now, except we live together. So, Nightmare.

She's like, Oh, my God. But do you guys sleep separately or do you still sleep together? What is that? She's like, Yeah. I'm like, I mean, we still hug up. I'm like, I mean, it's just easier, girl. I don't want to be out there on these streets. So Natalie's like, I mean, da, they're still living together. I just wanted to confirm. I'm not saying it doesn't make her totally messy. I mean, it's messy, but that's why she's going to fit in sure it's fine.

She's like, Listen, I'm just like, I'm getting it in. She's like, Well, doing what you need to do, girl. Yeah, I'm getting in where I can, girl. Yeah, girl. Yeah, girl. Pull out game. Pullout game has to be strong. So maybe Jason, he's cued a little distraction in the midst of this. Basically, she's like, whatever. I think she just is looking at Jason as just someone to hook up with at this point. So now we go back to it.

I hope that she's joking about pullout game. You better be putting in some pills down your throat or something. Don't make me come over there in my antivan and give you a... What do you call it that you put in your arm? A condom. The birth control in your arm? I'll do it. I'm going to become licensed for that. Just for my nieces alone. I'm going to follow them around and be like, You need a shot in your arm. I've got a little device to put in there. This is only going to hurt for a second. Be careful, Angelika. It's a dangerous world out there. You don't want to one day, nine months later, just eyebrows come out of you.

That's a disaster. Yeah, pull out method doesn't work, just for the record. Jason is like, Oh, man, guys, I'm all about Angelika, and I want to hit her up. It's just like, just let me do that. Let me just take the step and be like, Hey, I'm sorry for what happened the other day. It's like one sorry. That's all I need, man. That's what I can do. Why can't she let me have that? Back to the other place, Natalie's like, Yeah, I usually date people at work, which is what I'm trying not to do anymore. It's just like, it's very incestuous. It's very, very incestuous. Sorry, I just like working on my craft.

Now we go to the restaurant, and Chris, Marcus, and Demi arrive at Sir, and McKenna is like, Are those shades you're wearing tonight, Marcus? He's like, Yeah, I'm going to go tuck belt, black shades. Just go matrix on them. I'm a DJ now. All right, I've got Ray Bands.

Yeah. And then, Venus is talking to Natalie, seeing how she's doing. And she's like, Yeah, I'm just trying to plan for this event. I think nothing got done that was supposed to get done bar prep-wise. And Venus is like, Are you kidding me right now? But then we just go over to the Cloud's premiere where Lisa is doing some press for it. And she's like, Oh, I know this film is great. It's about aliens or cowboys or something happening, European walking shirtless and naked. I've heard a lot about it, and Guillermo has worked very hard. He's just a good man and deserves everything that comes his way. The only shame is that his wings are just too supple and intact. Someone break his wings already.

I would just like to thank my dear friend George Clooney for being too talented to actually do this film, which is why we've given the chance to my restaurant manager, Guillermo. Let me tell you, Guillermo is not afraid to bust a table. All right. Thank you. Thank you, international press.

They're all getting ready for this giant party and everything, and people are showing up, and Angelika shows up, and there's tension between her and Jason because of everything. He's like, Jason's like, Okay, let me go to the bathroom and fix my hair. His hair, he already has that Playmobil hair. It's like that circle. It's like Velma hair. It's like there's just a dome of hair around his head. He goes to the bathroom, and he puts I'm like, I'm not going to have my hands through it. Now it's all spiky and deranged. I'm like, I appreciate the tribute to 2004, but can we update this hair style?

Chris is like, You look like Zac Efron.

In 2004. Again, 2004.

Now we see Marcus at the DJ booth training, and McKenna's like, Oh, God. All right, here we go. Another fuck boy. I have to train to do my actual profession. He's like, Bloop, bloop, She doesn't let him touch any buttons, which I actually like because he's supposed to be learning. He does not get to touch anything. He just stands there behind there. He just stands behind there with those sunglasses. Like, Yep, Ray Bans. That's right. Ray Bans. Boreal these from Guillermo. Yes.

Then Jason goes up to Angelika, and he's like, now his hair's spiky and off to the side. He's like, Hey, I haven't seen you in a week. She's like, Yeah, it's been a while. I'm not going to lie. Imagine if she lied. It's been a very short amount of time. Why are you lying, bro? Thanks for not lying on this critical piece of information.

They go have a sit down, and He's like, So I just want to say I'm just really sorry about everything from before. I wasn't ready for the first time we talked. She's like, Yeah. I was a little confrontational. Not going to lie. Not going to lie about it. Because when you said what you said, it insulted me. Not going to lie. I'm not going to lie. It wasn't like a compliment. That would be a lie. We see a flashback to him calling her Clingy. He's like, Well, I didn't mean to insult you. I mean, Clingy doesn't have to be a bad thing. I like my girls' Clingy.

Except you said, Whoa, I'm getting a Clingy energy from you right now. I'm not sure about this. I don't think that was a compliment, especially by the way he pulled away from her.

That was not a compliment. Yeah. It's like you're boiling my bunny right now. Sometimes people like bored bunnies. What do you want me to say about it?

What do you want? He's giving Craig vibes a little bit. He has that… He's leaning into little boy. When he's like, Oh, man, my heart's beating so hard. But he's also, obviously, a liar, and he's always changing the truth and the reality. So Angelika is like, I mean, if I'm your girl, then I'll be Clingy. I mean, I did think you were so cool. Jason's like, I'm not going to lie now. I'm not going to lie But it really affected me the whole week. Wait a second. You're not lying? Yeah, I'm not going to lie. I was so stressed. Not going to lie. Because I met you and I thought you were really sweet, and you're the person that would actually like to get to know. So yeah.

You're the person I wish I didn't even ever see ever again. That was a lie. That was a lie. That one was a lie.

That was a lie. Two truths and a not going to lie. Isn't that just three truths? Not going to lie. You're totally right.

Well, maybe. I'm not even willing to give you a second chance. Just kidding. It's opposite's day. That was a lie.

Oh, my God. I was getting so lost in that because opposite day is, but also not going to lie, I couldn't really follow that. So thank you for clarifying that.

It's like, Well, I know that you do Taekwondo, and I do Jujutsu, and I was thinking we could go to jiu-jitsu together tomorrow. Oh, okay. She does Taekwondo, and you do jiu-jitsu, so you're going to do your thing.

Yeah. You're going to make her do your I was like, That's not… I feel like… I don't think what he realizes is that he has been… He's gone to the dog house a few different times now, and she keeps on letting him out for no good reason. He doesn't seem to realize he needs to bend to her a bit. He keeps doing these things. She's just like, Okay. She's like, Are you asking me to put you in a joke hole? He's like, Yeah, I would like that. Not going to lie. Angelika is like, Jason really tries hard to project a lot of confidence, but once you peel back a little bit of that ego, he actually It can be very endearing. I can't help but want to give him another chance. I'm like, It's your fifth chance. Yeah, enduring is fine, but he's also literally standing you up and lying and being crazy to you.

Yeah. He's like, He's like a little puppy. When you want to take that at home. I mean…

If it's rapid, no.

Don't fuck a puppy. That's what I would say. That would be my advice to you.

Yeah. She's like, Okay, well, you can just text me, and I want I'm not ignoring your call this time.

He's like, Oh, my God. So you did ignore my call. It's like, Yeah. Now, Audrey and Kim arrive, and Kim's like, I feel like everyone's staring at me, so I guess I'm just going to go in the kitchen and pretend this isn't happening, okay? Because she gets here in this awkward energy. Natalie is like, Are you okay? Are you okay, Vino? Are you okay, Vino? He's like, I just don't want to fight with her because I love her. You literally I don't even want to fight with her. I literally don't even know what we're fighting right now.

I think this is actually Natalie, not Natalie, but it is funny to think that Natalie is caring about… I don't think Natalie even knows who Venus is. So Natalie's like, What happened? And so, Venus is like, I just want to move on. I just want everyone to just fucking make up and just bring peace. So that's where I'm at in my head space right now.

Yeah, but it takes two because I told Angelika today, friendship is a two-way street instead of the fact that she's not talking to you, that is frustrating. That's not a step in the right direction. That's a wrong direction step. Where are you even going right now? Why are you going there?

You're on the wrong direction on the sidewalk on the one-way street. And friendship is a two-way street with sometimes a traffic light, okay? And also a little bit of construction on the side, so the sidewalk on the left is closed, so you're going to have to walk on the right side. That's a friendship.

Yeah, Marcus, or Venus is like, Well, even if Marcus doesn't want to repair a friendship, I don't want to lose Kim. Who wants to lose Kim? Everybody needs beige in their lives. Otherwise, fun throw pillows don't make as much sense. You know what I mean? We all need basics.

America is thinking right now, We cannot lose Kim. Kim is so vital to the success of this show and the success of my life. I cannot lose Kim.

It just feels like I'm missing a piece of home. I don't know that that's a compliment when you just told us you came from a place with one stoplight. You know what I mean?

She's the dumbster. She's the mailbox.

It's like, She's like a jar of Manny's. I haven't had that since I'm at home, so I miss her. So now, Audrey comes up.

He's like a close-down Walgreens.

Audrey comes up, and Audrey's like, Oh, my God! I'm so glad I get to wear this. She's in a low-cut little red dress thing. And she's like, Oh, my God! Look, you match my nails. So he's still going on about Kim, and he wants to talk about him, and he can't take another 24 hours. So he's going to do it, guys. He's going to do it. So, meanwhile, Kim is at the DJ booth, and he's like, Hey, you digging in or what? Can't hear you above the headphones. Got some Ray I'm sorry, I can't hear your response, but I'm pretty professional right now. That's right.

Then basically, Kim is like, Wow, it's not giving bad boy, McKenna. You're on ab duty. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, make sure his abs are okay. So Venus is like, Okay, okay. I got to prepare my hair. Okay, here we go. So I was just like, Yes, hair work, hair work. So Lisa comes up to the DJ booth and she's like, Okay, guys, I know you're living in your own little bed over here, but you have to read the room. Why are you not playing Pink Martini? Okay? That's the thing that gets everyone dancing.

You need to think of the vibes of the restaurant. Is there a song called You can run, but you can't hide. Or, I own you now. Or, stem cells, stem cells, give me your stem cells. Something, something, something, please.

All right, I hear there's this new jam that people are really into. It goes, You got to accentuate the positive E-limb, innate the negative. It's going viral everywhere.

He's like, Oh, Guillermo gave us a setlist, Lisa. I I'm pretty sure he's into it, but you're right. Okay, we'll dance now. She's like, Say that again. What did you just say? We'll dance now. No, the other thing. I forgot. You're right. That's what she said. You're right. Just keep saying you're right. Now get me some siddaka. New Siddaka. Get these juices flowing, darling.

Yeah, the party's beginning now. Peaches and cream.

Let's get them. Barry Manilow up in here. If you want the girls to really drop their panties, then just start saying, solid, solid as a rock.

Yes.

The big house has never failed in so.

Let's get physical, physical. Something current and new like that.

Then Shane comes in with a new dark-haired girl. Yet another. Yet another new one. And he's like, Whoa, no way. Who's that superstar over there in the radio?

Dj Marcus is like, Yeah, I think I'm crushing it. I mean, I should be DJing here. I mean, not even here, but around the world, even. I mean, if there's a play button on a CD player, I'm there to touch it, okay? If that's what people want, I'm going to give people what they want.

Wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, wiggy, w Now, Venus takes Kim outside to the smoking alley to have a discussion. He's like, Well, let me just start with not really talking to you and not communicating you. It's been really, really not communicating you.

It's been really, really, really, really, really All of a sudden, Marcus appears in the doorway. He's like, Wait a second. I feel a little sad. I want to be part of this. And Kim's like, Go inside. Go inside, babe. I'm having a scene. So, of course, he listens to what she does, and he's like, Okay, fine. He goes inside.

Okay. Well, anyways, first of all, it's been really hard for me not talking to you. I love you. I want to move forward. I can't imagine my life without you, Kim. I'm like, Kim, what is my life without you? You know? It's like, are You know, I've been in your corner more than anyone here, more than anyone. I want to make sure that everything's right with us. You know what I mean? You go with everything. You know what I mean? I need a friend that just blends in, just blends into I like that I could put you on a white carpet and just never even know you're there. It's really important. It's really important.

Well, I feel afraid to trust you right now because you wrote a really mean text after we wrote you a mean text first, but we act like you're the one who started it. I just don't want to feel that way because you were the person that I trusted the most here.

I was like, Okay, well, maybe I shouldn't have talked about you like that or talked to you like that, but I'll never do it again. And she's like, I don't want to cry. I don't want to cry. But there's so much. Marcus, in the past couple of weeks, me and Marcus, we opened up to you the most. Me and Marcus let you into the me and Marcus circle. That's a big deal. It's a big deal. We just don't let people into our circle. And then to be betrayed by you of all people, it's like we're not only being betrayed by you, but we're being betrayed by millions split ends. And you have to understand how that hurts.

It's a really big deal to let someone into the me and Marcus circle because you were the one that we trusted with information of what sunglasses he was going to wear for his DJ set or maybe, do we want to put the chair in the dining room or in the living room? Those were important things, and we let you into that, and we don't let anyone in. You just like, I don't know. Was it even real? Then just gets to Venus. He just takes both hands. He does a double flip. He just flicks all of his hair back all at once. It was like a major hair flip to be like, This is a big moment.

She tells us, Yeah, Venus was the place. Me and Marcus's relationship, he was our first phone call anytime we got into a fight. Oh, wow. You see, this is people like him. She's like, Oh, my God. He was so lucky. I would call him and trauma-dump on him every day. You think everybody gets that? No, he was lucky. He was lucky.

I know. What a privilege to be on the receiving end of not one, but two toxic people who call and dump all their shit on him and then probably don't ask him a question about what's going on in his life.

He got used by two people at the same time. Wow! What a lucky person.

He was that important to us. He was so important because he was the only one who actually had nothing going on in his life, so would have to listen to us.

Hello there. This is a two-part recap, okay? This is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two.

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Who, what, why, where, and Gwen, Pentland.

Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubs.

Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We We got our wish. It's Jen Plish. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo.

She's a total knockout. It's Katie Manoch.

Let's get Savage with Laura Wildman. In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder-Baron. She's a whiz. It's Liz Sarthe. Always killing it. It's Lola Alcalani.

The incredible edible Matthew's Sisters. She eases our woes. It's Melissa Saint Rose. There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud.

Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sara Lemke.

We cannot tell a lie, it's Sara Tellef Sun.

Shannon, out of a canon, Anthony. Please don't stop at Solean pop. Let's take off with Tamla Plane. You'll always get the full story with Tori Horses.

She ain't no Shrinking Violet Kutarr. We love you guys.