Transcript of The Toastoween I Turned Pretty: Friday, October 31st, 2025

Today's episode of The Toast is brought to you by Bi-Heart. Good morning, girlies. It's The Toast. It's Jackson Claude and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly, it's The Toast.

They sound amazing.

Welcome back to The Toast. It's Conrad Fisher, and I'm here with my brother who's a little bitch, Jerr. Fuck you, you're so high, girl. Belly, who's got her Belly out. Hey, Belly, how you doing?

I'm doing good. My name is Billy Conklin, and I'm here with my boyfriend, Conrad and Geri Maya, my two brother boyfriends. I'm belly with my belly. Jamaican. Jamaican, give me some stuff. I'm belly with my belly. Billy, how are you doing? I'm doing great.

It is our first toast of me without Jackie. We must honor our fallen sister. She is not here on her maternity leave.

Laurel, we miss you.

Laurel. By the way, Jackie's so Laurel. We all agree, right?

Or Susana.

By the way, has never seen the show. Who's Lorela? Who's Lorela? Who's Lorela?

Who's your mother?

That's your mom.

Oh, that's my mom.

Belly is. She's really strict. That was supposed to be my mother and mom.

Right. But, but, Jer.

But, Connie. Jare. Connie. Jare. Because Connie has to get everything, and I can't have anything. You want men, you want women, you want Belly, please.

No, belly was mine.

Okay, let's talk about how fucking funny we all look. Okay, first of all, honorable mention to Margot's hair.

You look amazing. Thank you so much. I'm trying to figure out who you look like, though.

You look amazing. I mean, I look like Ellen.

You look like Ellen.

With a mole.

You look like Ellen.

You look like...

Is there a reason we didn't get a longer wig for him?

It's not about the wig. The wig is long. Ben's head is huge, so it makes it look taller.

Who do you think I look like?

I don't know. I just want to say Ben is wearing... You look like Ina. Yeah, that's what it is. Margot, you look like- Ned's declassified. No, you look like Jeremiah. You look just like him.

I feel like it's going to be like this with my eyes the whole time. Yes.

You look Annie.

Yes.

That's what it is. You look like Annie.

Yes.

You look like Annie.

So, Mrs. Doufire-fisher, Conklin, is joining us here today. Garten.

Thank you for having me.

You're welcome. And again, so worth mentioning, Ben has never seen the show. I know you know the general premise.

By the way, I wanted to see the show just so everybody doesn't think I'm a hater, but this was a show that you just would watch without me. I would come in, I'd pop in, but I'm like five episodes. Oh, this is multiple seasons? Yes. How many seasons?

I read the books, too. Got it. Okay. Also, you wouldn't like the show. Sorry, it's for girls.

You don't think so?

No, he would think it is so lame.

Yeah, I would be embarrassed to watch it with you. It's one of those shows. You think?

Yeah. I like those shows.

You do? But let me tell you, you would really- I watched Sabrina, the Teenage Which, the reboot on CW alone.

I didn't even know there was one.

I was like, Margot, he watched it without me.

I mean, in this day and age?

The reboot. Oh, I didn't know. What's her name? What is that? What is that girl?

Kiernan Schipka.

Oh, I like that. Kiernan. Kiernan. Kiernan. Kiernan Schipka.

Belly is not... Belly is... Marco, what are you? What are you doing?

I think, didn't I see an episode where Belly was in France? Yes.

So you're not giving French Belly, you're giving American Belly with- No, this is a French Belly. Well, the wig is giving French Belly. I can't stop looking at Margot. Margot, why are you doing that? Because Jeremiah does that.

He's so annoying with his blue eyes.

By the way, you are Jeremiah. Annoying with your blue eyes.

Seriously, you insult my dog on Monday.

You call the I'm going to share my Fisher on Friday.

Seriously, what's next?

No, I'm sorry. I mean, just that you look a lot like him and you both have an annoying-I have his attributes for sure. You have annoying things about your blue eyes, both of you.

This is a tough seat.

I told you that's a tough seat because you're going back and forth. This is a tough seat. You okay?

I'm okay.

Well, happy Halloween, everyone. Hope you guys have fun plans for the weekend. We will be weaving in and out of the Fisher Conklin clan, but we are here to do a job today, which is the Fast Five Stories. You both... No, you didn't join me this week. Margaret did. No, I did. And, Margaret, let's talk about how I was the villain and you were the hero after Monday's episode. And I know you lived for it. And I was ready for the comments to eat you up, not me getting eaten up. What do you have to say? Margot, this is a podcast. You have to talk.

I love you. I love you. No, it's just like, when you don't have to do anything, you just sit back and it gets taken care of for you. Oh, yeah. That's what happened. And I have to say it was gorgeous. And thank you is all I really have to say.

I think you should cut your hair like that. Honestly, it looks It does look good.

It does look good. Imagine.

Imagine having everything we ever dreamed.

Is anyone doing anything for Halloween? No.

You don't have plans, but you're young.

I'm going to Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Deane.

Oh, fun. Already gave you the time and the place, so don't be shy. What music do you think Jerr listens to? Like, Sad Boy. Yeah.

You know?

Belly totally listens to... Taylor Swift, Grace. Brina. Yeah. And Conrad totally listens to secondhand Serenade.

He listened to the music that Ben listened to. What a song.

Yeah. I'm also a doctor.

The best thing about tonight's the one I'm fighting. Oh, you're a doctor. But you're not fired.

No, but I'm still a doctor. You're fired. I got fired for my internship in med school.

You couldn't even last one day, bro.

I'm still a doctor.

You couldn't last one day.

You're so jealous of me, Jeremiah. It's fucking disgusting. I feel sad for you. No. You have a meaningless life. You're obsessed with me and Belly. You are absolutely obsessed with me and Belly. And seriously, you need to get over it. And sorry, dad doesn't like you. By the way, I know. I know.

How do you spell Belly?

B-e-l-l-y. It's just as it sounds.

Her name is B-E-L-O-Y.

Her name is Isabelle, and her nickname is Belly, which is such a crazy part of the book and show that people don't talk about.

People call her Belly.

It's the worst nickname you could ever have.

Terrible. Yes, but it's the perfect nickname for you.

A hundred % Belly with my belly. But is she fat or she's not fat? No.

Got it. It's a type of nickname only a thin girl could have. Oh my God. Oh my God. If they call me Belly, seriously, I'm done. Put me on life alert. Terrible. I'm upset. Yeah.

Put me on life alert.

Yeah.

Wigs are horrible. I can't breathe. If I'm talking less, it's because there is literally a web in my throat.

You're having an episode.

Ben's having an allergic reaction.

I'm having an allergic reaction to the wig. I think it's made of horse hair. I'm not allergic to horse hair, but maybe I am allergic to horse hair.

Maybe you're allergic to the blush.

All that I know is something is crawling up and down my throat.

Nice blush, turn.

It looks gorgeous. Something is crawling up and down my throat. Also, I'm always a woman. Have I ever not been a woman for Halloween?

You have, but not in many, many years. I think when you joined us, and who was the first woman you played? Oh, no, no. The first time you dressed up as a woman is when you and I to Jeffrey and I now, but we gender swaps. I think you really got the bug to dress as a woman. You're low-key across I am. You have an opportunity to dress up as a woman. I like now when we can incorporate you into Toes to We. We're like, Well, who's the girl that Ben could play? Just assume that you're going to be the boy.

I just think I'm really a gorgeous woman. I am. You know what?

I thought this last time when you were being aunt Chesie, That when you wear makeup, you do look really pretty. Thank you, darling. You have pretty skin. Thank you. What is going on? Bearded belly.

This conversation is insane.

By the way, bearded belly. Bearded belly. Bearded belly. Bibi.

Bearded belly.

Now, we are going to do the fast five, just want to say. Let's talk about my mole. I was doing my makeup this morning and I was like, just Conrad have a beard. I forgot what he facially looked like. So I went on Google. I was like, oh, my God, he has that tiny little mole. Of course, mine's 10 times the size because this is theater. How do I look with a mole?

Could I rock it? Marilyn Monroe.

Marilyn Monroe. It's a great mole. It's a great mole.

It's very good makeup. Isn't that a great mole?

Oh, you think the shape is good? I did it in my phone. I think the shape is great. It's great. It's huge.

It's an amazing mole. Thank you.

Belly doesn't have any moles? We don't talk about Conrad's mole enough. I know.

It's unoffensive. You know how I feel about moles. This whole outfit is really triggering for me. I just hate moles, my own included. Having to play someone, I'm being taken back to a very dark time. I need to sit like a man.

Yeah, I feel like Jeremiah takes up space.

How do women sit? Oh, yeah.

Not like that.

I feel like Jeremiah takes up space because he's annoying.

Yeah, and I feel like Conrad actually sits like really good posture.

Yeah, this feels right.

Is this more Billy?

Yes, actually.

How do I look? Who is this more Billy?

When I told Ben who he was going to be playing, he literally turned to me and he goes, Oh, I'm Billy. All right. You're not going to be able to do that. That's unacceptable.

Sorry.

You should take your allergic reaction elsewhere. You guys want to check about anything else before we dive into the Fast Five?

How was everyone's week? What did you guys get up to?

Just worked so hard being a solo host.

How's it going?

I think it's crushing, honestly.

How was this episode performing the best? Do you really want to know? Yeah, I do.

Well, the thing is, as a present moment, it's not a fair metric, but yours did because yours has been out the longest. That's fine. But I think in terms of, it'll be Joey. Okay.

He's such a I can take it.

He is such a star. He's not more famous.

No, yeah. He's so funny, and he's so quick.

Yeah. So funny. He's so quick. I have a hard time keeping up with him. I can only imagine how people who don't talk as fast as we do can even understand I don't think he says. Yeah.

Kamastia. Gaina Kamastia?

Gaina Kamastia. You know what's so us right now?

What?

Time cast a spell on you, but you won't forget me. I know I should have loved you.

But you remember when you caused a scene at my mom's funeral?

Margot.

Yes, of course. Oh, yes, of course I do.

But never watch a show, first of all. So we have no idea what you're talking about.

No, I do.

Do you remember me? Do you want to apologize?

That was fucked up of me.

Yeah, well, really apologize to Connie.

Well, actually, I think we should all apologize for things. Jer, you low-key stole my girlfriend.

I cheated on her.

Oh, yeah.

You cheated on me, too?

Yeah, it was Lacy Barone. Lacy Barone.

We should have had Lacy Barone in Cabo.

Jackie's Lacy Barone.

Jackie's Lacy Barone.

We had sex twice. Did they? Yeah. He even told her that. Why would he tell her?

Why?

And Like, who? Okay, Megatolia is Susanna.

Oh, okay. Why? Because you want her to be dead.

Theo's Susanna. They both had cancer. She's over and I just know. Yeah, no, but Theo is Susanna. Mine's funny. Theo's Susanna.

Yeah, it's late now.

Who's Susanna?

It's my mom and her mom.

Our mom.

Okay, so you guys share a mom.

Because we're brothers.

Got it. Okay. I Did you do that the whole time? No, we're brothers. When I was going back and forth between the two of you. I told you this day. Yeah, grew up together, stayed in the house. You guys are rich.

Yes. Oh, and you're poor. I forgot to tell you that.

I'm really poor?

You're very poor.

Very poor.

Not very poor, but compared to us.

Actually, I did see the, oh, Billy and friends, and I saw her on the bus being poor. There was like...

I think she was just on the bus together from point A to point B.

I saw an episode. She was being poor on the bus. She was being poor on the bus. I saw it.

Yeah, so we're really wealthy.

Got it. How are we wealthy? Do we know? Is there a back story? I'm the dad.

I'm the dad. Finance. I have an investment fund. Understood. When your brother works for our dad.

My brother.

Your brother is Logi, a star.

My brother works for your dad.

Yeah, honestly, let's not introduce Steven. It's all in special.

It's all in special. Taylor.

Taylor is your best friend.

Taylor is who?

Your best friend.

Who is it?

Taylor. Taylor.

Taylor who?

What? Taylor. Taylor.

There's just a random girl that's not here named Taylor, who's my friend. Yeah, exactly.

Why do I care? Yeah, no, Marga, you're giving him his friend.

Why do I care who my best friend is? She's not here.

We're trying to paint the picture.

You want to be like, Oh, I'm talking to Taylor about that.

I have a friend named Taylor. I have my boyfriend's Conrad and Jeremiah, and their The mother's name is Suzanne.

Susanna. And your mom's name is? Billy. Laurely.

Laurely. Laurely Gilmore. Laurel. Laurel. Yeah.

And your mother's name is Steven.

And we randomly call you Connie. If you look Mike and Connie.

Thank you. Of Mike and Connie. Ben and I, when we were dating early days, we took a trip to Puerto Rico, and we used to just seriously sit in the casino 24/7, lose so much money. We made a vacation couple of friends of this literal trash couple from-We loved them, though. We had the best time.

They were from Staten Island, Mike and Connie.

Started playing, not play. We almost started hanging out with them outside of the casino. We met them at the casino every night.

We were so ready until we realized that they so hated Jews.

Yeah, they said something on the last day. We were like, What did you just say? Then we never saw them again.

But that was fun. I loved them. You sister's ass.

Every time he would win, he'd be like, Oh, your sister's ass.

Every time he'd lose.

Yeah, whatever. Connie.

Oh, Connie. Okay, Jeremiah.

But we call him Jerr.

Conrad. Jerr and Connie.

Jerr, Connie Belly.

Jerr, Connie Belly. Jerr, Connie Belly. Susie. Yeah. Right? Susie. My friend Tiffany. Taylor.

Tiffany, yeah. Taylor.

Anything else I need to know?

No, I think you're pretty much caught up. You've had sex with both of us. Got it.

Okay. Even though in the books, you only had sex with Connie.

Right, but we're going show.

We're going show.

You had sex with both of us.

You were engaged. Oh, you two were engaged. I'm a permiscuous young woman.

No. She's like, No. She's like, super conservative. It's only for Belly and Connie.

It's just for this family that she's fucking obsessed with. At certain points in the show, wants to forsake her own family and join this family for sure. She keeps her own family. She's a self-hating Conklin, even though Laurel's an amazing mother.

It's even rock.

Your parents are divorced.

Yeah.

What happened?

You come from a broken home. You do.

A broken poor home.

Yeah. Sorry. We come from a broken home. To be clear, we come from a broken home.

We come from a broken home. They're not poor. They're not poor.

You're just really rich?

Yes. They're fine. They're fine. They're fine. They go to college. They have a lovely house. They have a nice house. The mom is a professor and a writer.

They're fine. They're fine. The dad, we don't know. A professor. Oh, he's a professor. Yeah.

I think we should dive in. Yeah, let's dive in. If you guys are ready. Today is still the Turst. It's Turst to Weed 2025. Hope you're enjoying. Here are the Fast Five stories that you need to know. The Fast Five stories that you need to know are brought to you by Byheart, an infant nutrition company built from the ground up to deliver real innovation on behalf of babies and parents. Their mission is simple, make the best formula in the world. They use the latest in breast milk science. They've created a clinically proven easy to digest infant formula. It's made with organic grass-fed whole milk, certified clean ingredients, and it features a patented protein blend that gets it closest to that it possibly count to breast milk. I've been talking a lot about my breast milk journey, like when it will end. It might end tomorrow. It might end in a few months. I'm not sure when it's going to end, but I do know that I have the right partner for when it's time to start giving Ruby formula. I'm a big believer in by heart. I actually recently met the founders. I thought they were They're definitely cause-driven.

They're obsessed with babies. They're obsessed with the nutrition. They're asking the big questions. Why don't more infant formula brands use the latest breast milk science? Why don't more use organic grass-fed whole milk instead of skim? Why aren't more locally made right here in the US? They're stunting on all these other bitches, and it's making us ask questions. Buyhardt Wonders the same. They're an infinite formula company that's just obsessed with nutrition. Their next-generation gentle recipe was designed to deliver clean ingredients and high-quality nutrition. If you're curious about Buyhardt, head to buyhardt. Com. Byheart. Com. B-y-h-e-a-r-t. Com. Use our code, Toast30, to save 30% off your first subscription order for a limited time. Buyhardt is also available at Target, Walmart, and major retailers nationwide. You can check them out in stores today. Additional terms and conditions apply. Again, that code is T-O-A-S-T-3-0, and the website is byheart, B-Y-H-E-A-R-T. Com. All right. What story should I start with first? Should we start with the word of the year so maybe the young person here can explain it to us? Yeah, sure. I don't know if you know this, Ben, but like, dirctionary. Com, Miriam Webster. Dictionary? Dictionary. Com, Miriam Webster.

Every year, they do a word of the year, and it always symbolizes, and they've gotten increasingly more stupid. They're not even words these days. It's slang. I feel like one year, it was like Riz. So stupid. Dictionary. Com has revealed the 2025 word of the year, and it's actually not really a word. They've announced that the 2025 word of the year is the viral phrase 6-7.

What? You're kidding.

Margot, can you explain?

No, because by the way, I actually don't know. I've been seeing 6-7 everywhere, and it's the one I refuse to figure out what it is.

The website announced on Tuesday that its official word of the year is 6-7, a word derived from the song Doot Doot 6-7 by Skrilla. What the fuck? That features a recurring lyrics 67.

Imagine if Miriam Webster could see this now.

I just want to say Miriam Webster is always debasing herself. Hers is going to be '69. She's always making stuff up.

I mean the Miriam.

There isn't a Miriam. There was a Miriam. It's Miriam.

You don't think that there was a Miriam Webster?

Wait, what is 67?

This is what they said, If you're the parent of a school-age child, you might be feeling a familiar vexation at the sight of these two formerly innocuous numerals. If you're a member of Gen Alpha, however, you're smirking at the thought of adults once again struggling to make sense of your notoriously slippery slang. According to Dictionary. Com, 6-7 is a viral, ambiguous slang term. Thanks.

Why is your word of the year?

It doesn't have meaning. That is largely nonsensical. The website suggests that some argue it means so-so, like mid, or it could mean maybe this, maybe that.

But I Are we speaking English? There's not even a definition.

Like I'm feeling 6-7.

Others use 6-7 as a way to respond to questions as a result of seeing the number 67 in consecutive order in the wild, such as on a math problem or within a phone number. 77, 76. Oh, my God. Me and Ben had an inside joke. We are 6-7. For 10 years. 77, 76. 77, 76. One time. 77-76. One time? Literally one time. Ten years ago, we were at the nick game, and they have an announcement who was a funny voice, and the score was 77-76, and he just said it in a way that was weird, and we just say it all the time. 77, 77.

77, 76.

But this has nothing to do with 6, 7. I'm still unclear what it means.

It doesn't seem to have a meaning.

Okay, so I think we would use it like this. Ask me how I'm feeling.

How are you feeling?

6, 7.

Yeah.

Totally. Totally 6, 7. Like mid, I think. 6, 7. Yeah. 6, 7. What about 7, 8, 9?

7 was hungry.

Real. That's relatable. That's the word of the year. Although I don't think people take Dictionary. Dictionary. Com is so low-brow.

I'm pretty fucking pissed. I don't like this. Okay, Belly. I don't like this at all.

What would Belly's word of the Year be? Annoying.

Yearning.

Okay, actually, this is a fun game. Jer. I like how you're sitting. I don't know how to sit like a man.

It's honestly really nice. I know. It's freeing. It's freeing.

Okay, let me spread them. Yeah.

Men just do this all the time. It's nice. Is that how you sit?

Yeah, I think so. No, Ben always sits with his heel up on his-Oh, no, I see it like this.

Yeah, you But how you were sitting before was good, Belly.

This is exclusively a fat man's cross. Why do you say that? Because you have to create room for your thighs. This is a skinny man's cross.

That's how girls sit. I'm sorry. Any guy who sits like that is girly.

Or a TV news host or anchor.

They don't sit like that. They crossed their ankles.

What's his name? Larry King? Was that his name?

What is the thing?

I was going to say Stephen King. Larry King?

I don't know what either of you are talking about. I don't know if you know we're on a podcast.

You know Larry King? Yeah. He's not like this.

Cool. Okay, everyone, word of the year.

I'm too lucky.

Jeremiah's word of the year is seriously loser.

Cheater, lameo.

You're a self-hating Jer.

I'm a self-hating Jer. I hate myself.

Ben, How do my tits look?

They feel really like...

You look like you've got a.

It feels that way.

You think you have Joey got a. Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm hot. I'm fine. No, we're good.

I'm Nobody talks about how hard it is to wear a wig, actually.

No, it's brutal.

Terrible. Yeah, I'm sweating.

But fun.

I'm like, right? I wonder. Ben's obsessed. Ben and his hairflip. I would love to know what I look like. Do you know what I mean? I could see you guys.

I know. Same. I look like. You look like how you think you look like?

I don't think I look like Connie. Margot, you actually look so much like Jeremiah. Ben looks like he's obviously in a costume. You look silly.

Margot, you- Do I look warm? Do I look as warm as I feel. You're wearing a lot of blush.

So your face is a lot of a warm.

Why are you flipping your hair like that?

Because I can't look at both of you and it's a really fucking hard seat. Okay?

Oh my God, I know who you look like. I know who you look like. Lena Dunham. She has black hair now. You actually look like Lena Dunham. Your attitude is giving Hannah from Girls.

Totally.

You're like, I can't talk to both of you.

I hate you. What else does she say in that bad good show? Ben was obsessed with girls.

I love girls.

It was never a girls' person.

I love girls. I would like several of you guys watching it.

This is very Lena Dunham.

I think she actually wore that in Girls. She did. Now her hair is black. That's who you look like. Okay, so word of the year, according to Dictionary. Com. By the way, nobody listens to Dictionary. Com. They're low brow. Like, Merriam Webster is the fancy one. Okay, good luck.

Can Belly put her hair like, what about this?

No.

Sometimes Did you have a pony? No. Did you have a pony?

Okay, now you look like Joaquim Noah. By the way, I have a basketball story. I chose it for you, Ben. Oh, great. Megan Thee Stalian and NBA star, Clay Thompson, have hit a major relationship move.

I didn't know that they were seeing each other. I knew.

Isn't that a good couple? It is.

Megan The Stalian and her- She was the one who was in Love Island. Love Island.

Her NBA star boyfriend, Clay Thompson. What? Not her enormous fan.

You mean Megan The Stalian from Love Island?

She did a small role. She hosted one challenge.

That's how you know You don't know her from I'm a savage.

No, I do. But I didn't appreciate her until I saw her on Love Island. She's funny. She was really funny. She was a fantastic host. I was like, Oh, Ariana Maddox really fucking sucks at her job. You should really be this host.

I agree. I wouldn't be surprised if- Would you agree that she sucks at her job? I don't.

Guys, I don't know how... I've said this before. How does anyone have the time to watch a show every single night?

If it was once a week, I was only able to watch it because I was on maternity leave. Totally. 24 hours a day. That's fair. I haven't actually ever watched a season while also living a full life, and I don't know how people do it. I don't know how people do it. It's amazing.

It takes over their life. They're like, I have to go home to watch the Van. That sucks.

But no, it's so fun to watch. I get it.

It's a great show.

We had the time of our lives.

I've watched the first episode, and they play really good music. Yes, they play amazing music.

Oh, not me discovering the song, Oh, It's So Good by Jackie's friend, Mimi Webb.

Which song?

Ghost.

Ghost of You?

Yeah, sing it.

Our House on Fire.

Ghost.

I like that we're bopping, but we don't know the song.

Ghost of You.

Hold on. I love it. Don't play it because I know. I know. I know. I'm just looking at it.

What's that new artist that I like? Olivia Deane. Do you know Nox?

Like, K-N?

Yeah.

No. Cool. Ghost. Ghost of You. Yeah, wait. Ghost of You. Sing it. Hold on. I'm just going to play it really low.

Come on. They were playing when they were getting, Do it, said you wanted drinks and games. I thought you'd wonder. No, you wonder if you feel the same. When the lights go out, I see you.

She said it now. Oh,yeah, I remember that song. Very good.

Yeah, you're right.

They played the best-One Direction, Five Saucy.

Yes, they play the best music on Love Island. That's really why you would like it, Sachin. But back to the story. They bought a house together, Clay Thompson and Megan Thee Stanley. Now I want to know, Ben, who do you think has more money?

Does he have a lot of money? Clay Thompson. Yeah, he's had a couple of $100 million contracts. Oh, yeah. Go beg. No, NBA players these days, the contracts are so stupid.

What sport gets the biggest contracts? I feel like baseball.

No, the NBA. Nfl? No, not even close, Margar.

You guys, definitely not hockey.

You literally have bad players now on $40 million a year contract.

In the NBA.

In the NBA. Actually, number one is soccer.

We don't have soccer in my mind. Yeah, we do.

Messi plays for Inter Miami.

Yeah, we have- Who they play against?

We have major soccer. There's a Philadelphia Union in Philly.

Okay. I don't- Mark. What the hell is Philadelphia Union?

I only know that through work. I know that through work. Kevin Solvent, shout out.

There's also LAFC. They're all investors in that. That guy.

And they make a lot of money?

Yes, tons.

I don't think it's number one in the US.

I think soccer is number one. I think NBA is number two.

Us, you're sleeping on baseball.

But the thing is, baseball's contracts are so long. So you see something like...

No, not only that. I think if you did it per game, football's winning. They play three games a year and they make $100 million. For sure. Baseball players, they never go home. For sure. They're getting paid the most, but they're working the hardest. I don't think I would want that. I would want less money. I always say, if I was married to a pro athlete, I would want them to be in football because they'd come home with a concussion, but at least they're coming home.

They're literally brain dead.

They're literally brain dead. They have some facts. Oh, oh, oh. Kyla, weekly seven. Oh, oh, Kylian Mbappi. Oh, For Rael. I know Rael. I watched the Beckham documentary. He's approximately $600,000. Oh, 31 million per week. Oh, so it's $30 million a year, 600 grand per week. This is a significant decrease. Oh, damn. From Paris Saint Germain.

No, there's no lots of money.

Yeah, I'm totally... I know nothing about football.

But I'm sure that Clay Thompson it.

It's so chic.

Football?

I think, yeah.

Did you watch Beckham? Yeah, I did. The second one.

Victoria's? No, not yet. Was it good? It was okay. Soccer? Yeah, I think it's chic.

Ioh, that's who you look like. She's the man, Amanda Vines.

Yeah, that's Sebastian Heston. You said that on FaceTime.

I said it on FaceTime because that shirt is- That's who you look like. It's the shirt. Alleria colors.

It's the shirt. It's the shirt. It's the shirt. It's the shirt. It's the shirt. Welcome to Aliria. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, Welcome, welcome, welcome to.

Welcome, welcome to Aliria. Welcome.

They bought a house together.

Ben, what team does he play for? He plays for the Dallas Mavericks now.

I wonder where they bought a house.

He probably bought a house in Dallas, if I had to assume.

Also, he's now making so much money because there's no income tax.

In where?

Texas.

There never has been.

It's not a new thing.

No, I'm saying in comparison to Golden State, you know how much money he was losing in San Francisco with those crooks?

It doesn't say where the house is. It's not cute. That's a good thing. Really nice.

They're showing you the house, but they are not showing you where they wear it.

They did hard hands in front with their keys. So cute. I just want to say I ship these two so hard. I never see them or I think about them, and then they come across my desk and I'm like, Oh, they're perfect for each other. I'm glad they're still together. I have two Dancy with the Stars stories. The one is that... Yes.

Well, via online, she watches the clips. But you really see everything.

Did you see Val's brother, Max, going on the podcast about Yon? Yes. Then did you see his apology today?

I didn't see he apologized.

Okay, with the ads, I can't...

Yon was like...

Max, Comerikowitski, has I apologize to Jan Rovnik after his turnt podcast and has invited Jan to meet and quote, Bury the Hatchet. I just want to say, Max is giving actual stalker.

No, and it's also like, did you see Val, what he said?

Yeah, he was like, let's say my brother has a lot of opinions. I don't agree with them. He's very passionate, but no, I don't agree. I'm very diplomatic because he has to work with Jan. Totally.

He doesn't want to cause drums for Alex.

Then Max made an Instagram play tagging at Yon. It was basically like, first and foremost, I want to apologize to Yahn for the way my words had made you feel for hurting your feelings. Even though Yahn said it didn't hurt his feelings, Yahn was asked about it. After the episodes, they all stand around the ball room and do interviews. He was like, Yeah, I saw it. It didn't hurt my feelings. He was just like, I don't care. He said he's trying to be relevant. Honestly, he was a slave from Yahn. Everything I see of Yahn post Dancing with the Stars, I didn't like him when he was on, but now I'm obsessed with him. This is what Max said, There's a lot more I want to say. I would like an opportunity to do it over coffee or anytime you have to spare. I would love to meet. I would love to talk about this and bury the hatchet.

Respectfully, no one cares what you have to say.

Respectfully, actually leave Yon alone.

Who's Max? I'm saying he was on the show.

He used to be a brother as well. He used to be a brother as well.

He was a former dancer. Yeah, and his brother's still in the show.

He's Alex Merrill's partner.

He's married to another former.

It sounds to me like Max is just trying to-Stay relevant.

Stay relevant. A thousand %. Not only did Yon not respond to him, now he's writing, Again, I'd love to meet. I have to meet you now. I'm so team Yon.

Don't make me your problem. I don't want to talk to you.

I'm team Yon.

Team Yon.

Then the second dancing with the Star story was that-Yon.

Team Yon.

Do you want to flip your hair and say it again? Ben was having issues. Ben was having issues prior to recording that the horse hair was getting in his eyes. He had contacts.

Are you okay? I'm fine.

But you're wearing contacts.

I didn't realize you're not wearing glasses.

Well, Belly doesn't wear glasses.

Of course. No, I know, but that's crazy.

Timion.

Timion.

Timion.

Well, everyone's talking about this photo making in the rounds. People might not have noticed, but in the background of the filming on Monday, Ashley Tisdale was there with Kenny Ortega. I saw that. A little high school musical reunion, and they were both there as guests of Dylan Efron. Now, I know everyone's sick of me talking about this. That's weird. Because they say, I'm just looking into. What the hell? No, Zac Efron, but Kenny Ortega.

And Ashley Tisdale. They even know each other?

Wait, I got an email today. Youtube TV and Disney haven't reached an agreement. We can't watch ABC on YouTube TV anymore. How am I supposed to watch dancing with the stars? Espn-we need cable back. No, we don't.

We can't watch Nicks games.

Yeah, we can't watch Nicks games.

What do you mean?

Unless they're on my channel. There's no MSG on YouTube TV.

You can only watch a nick game on MSG.

You can only watch a normal net game. If it's a hard G game, if it's a great game- We don't nationally broadcast every single nick game.

They don't?

No, because- Margot, that's something I learned about sports, too. Your fave team might not be on TV.

Most of the time. If I was Okay, but what about a Utah jazz fan? If you go to a bar to watch a game, would they have it?

They would have cable.

But, Margaret, if you were a big- They would make sure to have it because they're a bar. If you were a big Utah jazz fan in this very moment, you would never be able to see their games.

That's That's so crazy.

I know.

What about like red zone stuff?

Then you could see it in a tiny box. When I became a big San Francisco 49ers fan, when I found out everyone was listening to our podcast in the locker room, I couldn't watch it. I was literally downloading a VPN.

That is so wild.

No, I know. What was the story? No clue. Oh, YouTube TV. We're not going to be able to watch. What do we do?

There has to be another... Can you stream on Peacock?

You can watch it next day on Hulu. Or what about Disney Plus? Next day.

Not Disney Plus. Yeah.

Next day.

Really? But Disney and Next day. That's crazy. What is everyone else going to do?

There's no ABC, there's no Disney. There's no ESPN on YouTube TV anymore.

How do these people get you a boiling point and just drop the ball?

I streamed on Hulu the night of. Oh, you did? Yes.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, you're sure? Positive. Absolutely. Okay.

Well, Ashley Tisdale and Kenny Ortega have reunited at dancing with the stars after the high school musical actress and the film director reunited on dancing with the stars ballroom to watch Zac Efron's younger brother Dylan Efron bop to the top for the show's Halloween Night. Ashley embraced her Disney channel roots, sharing a fabulous selfie with Kenny in the audience. She said, I love at Kenny Ortega so much. So much fun cheering on Dylan Efron together. I'm sorry? It's weird. It is. Very weird. For sure, it's weird. I've been trying to convince everyone that there's something- Does she married?

Ashley's his dad?

Yeah, she has two kids.

Got it. Okay, so she couldn't be dating him.

No.

And he has a girlfriend, long time high school girlfriend. Who does? Dylan Efron.

Oh, really? Yeah. Do you think that he is secretly with his partner? I do. Oh, but she's married. Married.

With kids, yeah. Another partner.

By the way, it happens a lot.

This feels like a show of cheaters.

You know Robert Herjavec?

It is like everyone like... You know Robert Herjavec?

From Shark Tank? Yeah.

He was on dancing with the stars and then left his wife and married his partner. They have twins.

Yeah, I mean, you're so close, so sexual.

That's why you're never allowed to go on.

Understood.

That makes sense. The Bella twins. Yes. She married him.

Then they got divorced because he was very turnt behavior. We saw them in LA. Did you? At Erwan, yeah.

Yeah, no. But so it happens all the time. They're always dating.

You think Andy's Are you going to run away with this woman?

I hope so. Also, Sasha Farber.

Remember, Jen Tran, Bachelorette? Yes. Are they still dating? No, they broke up.

No, there's a lot of... I actually just saved a TikTok because it was somebody going through- The pros. Yeah, the pros who have literally gotten married and divorced and then dating it. Soemma. Okay, Sasha and Emma.

Andy's partner. Yes. Emma.

Yes. Was married to Sasha Farmer. Now, they're divorced. She's dating Alan. Yeah. Oh, on the show. Yes.

Is she dating Alan? Yes.

Who's Elaine Hendrix's He pisses me off. Who? Alan. Well, he watches this show. I just found out.

I love you, Alan.

And he's Jewish. He is? Almost all the guys are Jewish. Max and Val are Jewish. Well, they're probably Russian Jews. The Eastern European's on the show. And ballroom dance is big in Eastern Europe, so it makes sense.

Fun fact, I have played basketball with Val.

Yes, Ben has. Ben joined the basketball league.

Probably three years ago, there's a LA pickup game, and Val was there.

Somebody invited Ben. Wow.

I'm like, This is Val. I'm like, I'm cool.

I'm sure you had no idea at the time.

But he's aggressive. He's fast, he's aggressive, only afterwards. Got it.

He's in amazing shape. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. He's like a hustler, rebounds, defense.

Something I want to talk about Ben.

I'm not going to do any of those things. He's the opposite of me.

I go to Ben's. No, not him, go. You don't really play so much anymore. But Ben used to be in a couple of league, and you're an amazing shooter. Ben will stand from halfway down the court. But when I tell you, he does not move. He does not run. He doesn't do defense. He just waits the basket for somebody to give him a ball. His teammates don't give it to him because it's annoying. Yeah.

Oh, you sound so fun to play with. No. Wait, by the way, also on Dancing with the Stars, I just wanted to call one thing out. You know what I've really been enjoying is how they've been showing, which I feel like they used to do back when not everything had to be so politically correct, when the pros would make their partner cry.

I saw that video of Max, too, with Hope Solo.

Oh, but not even that. But there was a video of Alex crying because she said to Alex, she was like, I want you to be hard on me. I want you to yell at me, tell I have to do, whatever. At the end of it, she's crying. She's like, This is exactly what I asked for.

Well, I saw a video of Max's time on the show when he was training Hope Solo and he shoved her and made her cry. It was actually not funny. Yeah, it was bad. Max is giving big loser energy, I just want to say.

Yeah, I don't I can't take you seriously if you're looking at me like that.

It's a perfect shade for Ben. Look at Ben's lips.

I actually disagree. It's a little peachy.

Yeah, for you, but it matches Ben's skin tone really well. I can't with the-Jerima, I just want to say I'm loving your glossy bomb.

Not your mom wearing lip gloss. No, I just wasn't thinking this morning, and so I always put on my lip stain before I start doing my makeup. Then once after I put it on, I was like, Wait, fuck. You can't take off a lip stain.

It happens a lot with Tosta Wean. I'm not going to be on here with no makeup. Yes, Conrad's wearing Natasha Janona foundation.

I feel like I'm doing that money.

But it's an amazing foundation. I need it.

I highly recommend. I need it.

But I'm not going to be here makeupless. No. Every time I play a male character, he's wearing a bisyl foundation and a contour. Same.

I have a full face. But Jermai would because he's like that.

Does anyone have a theory on Dylan and Jack? I will let this go at some point, but I just want to say I was right.

I just think that when something could so easily be solved by an Instagram story and it doesn't get done, then there has to be an issue.

It begs the question. Yeah, I like that, Margot.

I don't know. Belly? I don't know. I don't know. Belly? I don't know.

Get the fuck away from my girl. Chair? Chair? Chair, get out of here.

Chair? Ladies, there's more than enough to go around. Oh, men.

Oh, boys. Oh, Chair, what are you doing right now? Margot, can you talk into the mic, please?

This is my engagement ring.

That's actually garbage from Starbucks.

Oh, thank you. It doesn't fit. Is it like she She got a shitty ring. No, you have no idea.

She got a ring like that. This? No.

Imagine this was for a woman.

No, but smaller.

What do you mean smaller? Thinner. There was no ring? No.

No, it was likely a dot. It was probably the size of a Sesame seed.

Yeah.

But he's rich. Right.

That's why everyone- But he refused to take money from his dad because his dad is toxic and won't come to my job.

So he scrunched together his lifeguard money and bought her a plastic ring. Did you see Amazon Prime on Twitter making fun of that girl's wedding? Yeah, that was fucked.

It was Amazon Prime, like India.

Uk, yeah. Same thing. Ready for our fifth and final story. Oh, Jesse Eisenberg. Do you know who that is? Ben, this actor. Yes, of course. Social Network. He announced, randomly, that he's low-key donating his kidney to a total stranger.

Wow. I didn't know where you were going with that. What did you think I was going to say?

I thought he was doing all his money.

No, that's you. Okay, Jesse Eisenberg is donating a kidney to a stranger, and he's calling it a no-brainer. He shared the news while he was recalling his participation in the Today Show-sponsored blood drive. He was just like, he didn't come on the Today Show to say this. They were talking about how a couple of years ago, he was on the Today show. They did a blood drive, and he donated blood. He's like, I just have so much blood in me. I feel like I should spill it all. I really like doing it. I don't know why. I'm actually donating my kidney in six weeks. I really am. Holy crap. I thought he was joking. They were laughing. They were like, Wait, really? That's crazy. Yeah. He was like, I got bitten by the blood donation bug. I love it. Then the host was like, Well, that's a big jump to donate your kidney. He's like, I'm doing an altruistic donation in mid-December, which is when you don't know the person, you just save a lot in the registry, you find out your match, and you give it.

I just refuse to believe that if you donate your kidney, you're fine afterwards.

Well, you are, unless the other kidney craps out. Having two kidneys is just having a backup hard drive.

I'm pretty sure that we're born with two kidneys for a reason. It's a very lovely thing. To back up. I'm just saying. What happens when his second kidney goes away?

I wouldn't even think about it for a second. For a total stranger, that's so nice. I could never. That's crazy.

Yeah, wow. For him.

Like, Where do you draw the line? Obviously, my immediate family, anyone needs a kidney, I'll do it. But second cousin.

No, but immediate family, best friends. I think you would for your best friend.

I would best friend over a second cousin. Yeah, me too.

Oh, you would. Okay.

Yeah, for sure.

What's a second cousin?

Do we have any?

I don't know.

I feel like I have a million of them.

You do.

I'd probably do it for a second cousin. Where do I draw the line?

Okay. Belly. Would you give Conrad or Jeremiah a kidney? Of course. She would give them. Which one?

Anything.

If I could only pick one.

If we both needed a kidney.

And you only have one to give. I know you don't know this, but I just want to remind you, you and I are engaged. We're OTP. We're getting married. We're in love.

You guys haven't gotten engaged yet. Relax.

Oh, right. Oh, right. No, but we get married. No.

Why don't you ruin it? I've decided to give my kidney. To kill you both. To Jeremiah.

Oh, my God. Jeremiah, you are not the father.

Oh, my God. You're going to kill Connie.

That is- That's Connie? I was like, Who is that?

Wait, what?

Conrad. Connie is a woman's name. It is. Connie is Conrad. No, Connie is like a Karen in Walmart. Her name is Connie.

That is 100% your look.

That is 100%.

We have to have Ben do that TikTok. Yeah. Okay.

That is 100% your look, Connie Baby. Oh, God.

Cringe.

Maybe Belly, actually. Connie, you can have her.

Time cast a spell on you.

Is that in the show?

It's a pivotal moment.

Is that Tara McLauchlin?

It's a good one. Mac.

Got it. Pretty similar.

In the home. You have a mental breakdown because I'm not being a good boyfriend at my own mother's funeral. I think they're working on. Then you storm out the funeral, and then that song starts playing.

You actually yell at me, and you yell at Connie at what they call a shiva, whatever that is at the house. You yell at Connie in front of everyone at his mom's wake. That's pretty fucked up. It was so awkward. Then you fall. Then you fall. She fell.

She fell. Time cast a spell on you, but you won't forget me. I You will get your belt. You won't forget me.

I know I should have loved you, but you will not let me.

Here we go. Ready? Was it just a boy? I'll follow you down to ♪ The sound of my voice is on you. Give me just a chance. I can't stop looking at your belly button. You have the biggest belly button I've ever seen my life. Billy. It is a vast dark hole.

It is. I mean, if you guys want to zoom in.

I miss Lacey.

It goes really deep.

She misses Lacey? I miss Lacey. Did you hear that, Pelle? Who?

Who the fuck is Lacey? Is she friends with Taylor? No. Oh, she's the mom.

No. I cheated on you with Lacey.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm waiting for it.

It's been an absolute pleasure hanging out with you guys. I hope you enjoyed another party toaster wean in the box. I was really worried about not doing toaster wean with Jackie, but honestly, we crushed. We crushed.

Missed her, though.

Of course, Laurel. Thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast Milana Morning Show. We deliver the fast life stories. You need to know every Monday, Friday on YouTube. So you're watching us on YouTube. Please don't forget to subscribe and give us a video. Thumbs up. We're also available. It's podcast and rep, podcast. We found it on Spotify. We got a box of all places. We're listening to podcast, and that's a podcast. We have a podcast. We have a Toast Me five-star review about our beautiful, about our stunning, and about how wickedly talented we are. Love you. Bye. Leave a message. Bye.