Transcript of Nicolandria Incorporated: Wednesday, May 6th, 2026 New

Good morning, girlies.

It's the toast.

It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know.

We'll start your day off swirly. It's the toast.

I sound amazing.

Welcome back to the thirst. How you durst? It's jurst.

It's jurst and turst on the worst day of the week, I guess. Is it? Is it the worst day? No, no.

What's today? Wednesday? Not even fucking close. I would say— I would argue it's the third best, or yeah, and the third worst. Correct, right in the middle.

Yeah, well, happy Wednesday. Did you watch Summer House last night?

I did.

I actually did not watch Summer House last night, um, due to my new co-sleeping adventures. Um, I had to put the boys down with me, and I was like, you know what, it's 9:30, I'm gonna like pretend to fall asleep with them, and I'm gonna go to sleep with them.

So it really doesn't even require a recap, it was such a boring episode. We do have Dear Toasters today, so that'll be at the end of the episode. But let me say this— what, what are you—

we also, in our fifth and final story, there is like Summer House news. So if you wanted to like share your thoughts on the episode, which please by all means share them, I actually really don't have thoughts on the episode.

I have a couple of thoughts on Watch What Happens Live. Yeah, that's in our fifth and final All right, so you know what, I'll just wait. Um, so that's negative thoughts.

We also do the Tursters.

The Tursters. And you know what's so funny? We go through— it's actually not funny— we go through eras, like people writing in like, is my husband gay? Right now we're in the era of my— like, there's two. Is my husband a pedophile or a sex offender?

Like, stop.

I tried not to choose.

I can't handle it. I actually can't handle it.

It's like It's such a vibe killer to say, but like, what do you do if you're going through your husband's nightstand and you find like a secret hidden camera? Like, not— it's not set up, but like he owns a hidden camera.

I can't. I, I can't honestly.

And I would choose that one.

And I don't like know this person, so I can't assume their intentions. Like, what if it's a bird watching camera and he likes to sneak it in the trees to get footage of the birds? Like, I don't fucking know. Or, you know, he's a pedophile. A sex offender, of course, of course.

Like, it's probable.

Or a snake, you know, maybe he's just spying on you to get, like, get information. I don't know, I don't know these people, okay? It's just too much for me. It's too much on my shoulders.

Well, I tried to choose like a good mix of, you know, both sex offenders while also, you know, in-law drama.

Classic, classic stuff.

That's so Dear Toaster. So we have that. We'll do a little bit of Summer House recap. How was your day yesterday, Miss Foley?

Oh my God, my day was so busy. When it was done, I was like But then it never ended because the children like never went to sleep until I went to sleep with them. But I was like driving around town like speed listening to the Redheads book. Oh, right. The It Girl, like to finish it in time for the episode. We recorded the episode yesterday. It's actually a great episode and I feel like it's gonna be a little surprising that not everyone loved the book. Nobody in the group loved the book.

Well, it seems like nobody loves the Redheads and so you're all speed listening to it the day before. So obviously you're not gonna like a book that you're like speed listening to, half reading.

I was the only one who, who did that. Everyone else, like Margo dedicated her weekend to read the book.

Yes, she was very stressed last minute about it. Like everyone is coming at it with like a negative—

not at all. I love Alison Pataki. This is my fifth read by her.

I mean, they're coming to the Redheads like with a rushed attitude, and I'm sorry, I'm taking it personally. Like that's my favorite book, and if you guys didn't like it, like that's a you problem, not a book problem.

It wasn't like I didn't like it. My rating was favorable, but it wasn't Marjorie Post. Like, it didn't slay for me. I found all of us had like a lot of issues with like the book and the character, and it was actually, I think, surprising considering you would think this was like such a win. But that's the thing about the redheads, like, you can't put us in a box. You never know what's going to happen next. Also, a fun fact about the redheads is now we're like actively trying to get canceled because that would sort of like solve our problem here. So we're kind of going off the beaten path, you know, in trying to court a cancelation for ourselves.

Well, good luck with that. Uh, let me just say this: leave me out of it, okay? I want no part of the redhead's cancelation. Um, and I'm sick. I'm sick from this news. I'm just sick.

We didn't like the book, that we didn't love the book.

Sick.

Why? You didn't love Next to Heaven. It happens. Different—

he's some garbage.

Different strokes for different folks.

Oh, speaking of Different Strokes, I don't know if you heard, but we're like kind of getting canceled for our Jeff Lauren Bezos Nicole Sanchez take.

Hey, I knew I you know, manifesting a cancelation somewhere.

What's— yeah, wrong show. What's the deal?

What's the tea?

Oh, you know, just not people not liking our takes. And to that I say, I actually felt like— I don't care—

we were so mid on it.

Like, we didn't even go hard. I think that if you don't come out and say like, Laura Nicole Sanchez Bezos should kill herself, like, you're not going hard enough. That's what people want.

Oh no, I don't believe that. Unfortunate.

I don't believe that either. Although there is— and I was telling you about this this morning— I was watching this like, um, dissertation on Nick from Love Island. And it hasn't happened fully yet, but I do feel like the tides are changing a little bit on like public discourse on Olandria and Nick. Because if you're a Nickolandria truther, which you and I have been from literally the moment they met, literally the first episode, um, we know that this is a fake relationship. It's just extremely convenient. It's a well-executed PR relationship, but like we have seen through it from day one. Um, and now with this Vulture article people are starting to. And also Sierra comes up on my TikTok a lot, and she's just an influencer. She never talks about Love Island. She does like a lot of, you know, gratitude journaling and trips to the Cape. And the comment sections, like, it's actually been wild to watch them do a complete 180, because at first the comments were literally just like the worst things ever, and now they're like, oh, I always liked you, or oh, everyone was wrong about you, Sierra. Oh, like this comment, if you never hated Sierra, like, seriously, so finicky.

Like, everyone's just flip-flopping all over the place. Um, and now, you know, the Nick Landry truthers are being sort of vindicated, especially with Nick and his relationship with Sierra. Like, that was your girlfriend, you had sex with her, and then she got kicked off the show and you never spoke to her again.

Yeah, that was wrong. But right now I'm just like hung up on the fact that like you guys are carrying on a fake relationship for whomps. Like, Nick Landry is a business. Anyone who talks about it like it's a relationship I like— I, I love that. I don't know how you could be so naive.

Nicolandra's— it's literally Nicolandra Incorporated.

It is. And it's like, I don't understand why Alandria is a part of it. He is just— because she's— she doesn't need anything or anyone. She's in a category all of her own. Like, and I would like for her to find like real love. And if they— I mean, I can't even say like if they're in a relationship because they're so obviously not. Because even the, the couples on the show that were so into each other on the show have petered out. So what does that say about the couples that faked it till the end? They're so dumb.

What do you mean faked it till the end? They weren't even in a relationship till the last episode.

Yeah, yeah, it's just I can't even be like— and if they are together, like, why would they be together?

I just need to reaffirm like that you and I are captains of the Nicolangia truthership because like, you know, we've seen it now with like Amanda Matula. Things change, everybody's like, I never liked her. We have got on record, of course I just can't wait for like the actual truth to come out. And we were pioneers, and we got a lot of hate. Like, there's a lot of the Nickelodeon truthers were like— there were some serious allegations. Like, you were called racist. Like, what, he can't love Alandria? It's like, are you fucking kidding me? She can't love him? Like, are you guys stupid?

You're racist.

Yeah, like, it was seriously— it's hard out there for a Nickelodeon truther.

It is. And I just like, sometimes we take a hard position, I'm like proud. I'm like, you know what, we rode it out. It was hard. This is so obvious to me. Like, I don't even feel proud or like I said the hard thing. Like, this is so obvious, it's clear as day.

Absolutely.

And I just want to say, favorite word that took me years to learn how to pronounce: usury.

Usury.

Usury. I always thought it was pronounced usury.

Claudia Usury.

U-S-U-R-Y.

Isn't that a fun word?

That's easy.

That's a good one. Mhm.

Userus, loserus, loser sneeze.

So all roads lead back to Love Island. Kind of living for that Vulture article, like the—

yeah, she didn't—

she sent through the industry.

She didn't go hard enough.

No, and she was also just like saying she was also calling him just like dumb, like he just goes with the wind.

Like, no, but she also picked him for like the masterminds for the list.

Yeah.

A million girls would kill for that spot. 30 people chosen, Nick?

Question mark.

Yeah.

Oh, Landria was obviously busy and she said, my stand-in can come. Does that work for you guys? Yeah, yeah, that's definitely what happened. She was definitely put Amaya on that list.

Also, I feel like the Amaya truthers are starting to come out. Not that there's anything like really wrong, like she's a lovely girl, but the fact that—

so sweet—

that she won Love Island just to like stick it to someone for something that happened like 6 weeks previously on the show when like a lot of other things were happening. Um, that didn't need to happen, you know?

Yeah, that was such a wild season.

And like the fact that Brian—

whomst Brian—

like, and someone from Casa Amor won the show is insane.

They need to put some systems in place to make sure something like that never happens again. The fans have too much power on that show.

Yeah, but that was—

the fans are not smart.

That was the fans like trying to game the system, you know? Like, you think Ace and Shelly are going to win No, these randos, literally. That's why I have issues being a part of like the Love Island community. I have issues.

Yeah, I, I very much like— I set up permanent residence on the outskirts of the community. Like, I don't want to be a part of them. I don't think they're smart. They're the scariest group of people on the planet.

No, and it's like, it's bad when the audience gets too much power, and it's bad when the islanders get too much power, where then they send Jeremiah and Hannah home.

Oh my God, Jeremiah and Hannah.

I'm not— I'm still there.

So yeah, that's what I saw my morning scroll this morning, just like a changing of the tides.

That's always exciting.

And it's so funny how personal your, um, timeline is, because I was telling you yesterday about the heated rivalry, guys, how like everybody hates one and not the other. And the people in our comment section were like, Claudia, that's not true, we love them both, we love them both, we love them both. And I must be on like gay Twitter because the gay community hates the straight one. I'm telling you. And all the girls in our comments were like, we love them both. Really? I see him getting read to filth on Twitter every single day. And I never even watch the show. I don't know why I would be served this content.

Yeah, but I think I must be just on gay Twitter, or they just like know that you loved like the haters pitting people against one another. Yeah, and that like you love the hate, hate, hate.

I literally do.

It's just like, no, I don't love the hate, but like It's interesting to have an opinion.

It's more interesting to hate.

I know, but that's bad. But even though, like, we love, love, love, you know, as much as we talk so much shit, like, it's so true. There are not two nicer, kinder, more generous girls. And I know us, like, offline.

It's true. And because I know us offline, like, I— and I know how really sweet and genuine we are, like, it's actually shocking that we are Nicolandria truthers because, like, we do believe in love.

That's why we're Nicolandria Truthers.

No, I know, but I could see us also getting swept up in the Nicolandria of it all for a minute.

I actually was like, I was like, oh, this is fun. And then production, they put them together, sent them to that remote date when they both were getting eliminated, and they gave them a chance to be together and they said no thanks. So like, I moved on.

No, they literally only coupled up because it was their only way to stay on the show. Like, seriously, how dense are people?

No, like, I was down to clown and they both said they weren't into it. Like, that was—

they made out and they were like I'm good.

Yeah.

I don't need to do that again.

So that was like all I needed to see.

Yeah. I feel like we should dive in. We kind of have a lot to do.

We do to do. So without further ado to do, it is time for the Fast Five Stories that you da do need to know.

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Thank you, turd away.

Wait, I wanted to tell you something. Yeah, I'm like annoyed.

Why?

I really was trying to get that Walmart mahjong set for $80. Did you see it? Sold out. But you know what, they have one— I don't want to say where it is— at a Walmart in New Jersey that like I'm actually gonna drive to.

Oh really? I looked, you can't get it online. My local—

you can't get it online. My local did not have—

maybe I guess I saw where it is, it's not close, but I could take a trip. Road trip.

Yeah, it comes with such a cute bag. I don't love the racks, but— and or the mat, but to get tiles in a bag for $79, like, I have to go. Honestly, you know what, I'm doing it.

Yeah, okay, maybe I'll try and go and then wait.

I want— oh, happy birthday to our Satchel! Our little sister's birthday is today, and I want to wish Satchel—

oh my God, you want to hear the funniest thing? So yesterday on the Redheads, I was telling Margo— we were talking about her birthday, obviously, because that's what's happening in the Redheads community— and I had told her, like, my birthday gift will actually be there on her birthday. And I bought it, you know, sort of last minute, but I had to wait for it to like sort of come across my desk. Like I didn't know what to get her. And then the perfect thing, I sort of arrived on my Instagram and she was like, I feel like I know what you got me and I already bought it for myself. And I was like, what? She was like, Hunza G Burberry. So yes, I got her two swimsuits from the Hunza G x Burberry collaboration and she had already bought one, but She bought— I bought her two, like, two different colors, and she got a different color, so she has three, and she can return what she doesn't like, and that just means I slayed.

It's true.

That's how you do it.

So, Satchel, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, Mrs. Satchel, happy birthday to you.

We love you, Satchel. The place looks great. It always does.

Well, it always does.

I love her. I know, I love little Sachi. Let's just go home and call her. Okay, call it a day. Um, also, you guys, shower her with love today. Tell her her work outfit is adorable and just be sweet to Sachi, okay?

Be sweet to Sachi.

BSTS.

Oh, I thought of a new acronym this morning. Okay, and I'm gonna start using it. Pita.

Pargi?

No.

P-I-T-A?

Mhm.

Please?

Mm-mm. Can I try? Yeah. Pain in the ass. Ooh, I kind of love that. Yeah. Pita. Pita.

Are you ready for our first story?

Mhm.

In no particular order, Kim Kardashian makes a difficult decision in her law journey after multiple failed bar attempts. So reports are saying now that Kim has skipped the February bar exam, no plans to try again in July. Uh, the tests are offered twice per year, you get two tries per year. Sources are saying that she will not try again until 2027.

Okay, like, listen, you know, John F. Kennedy Jr. famously had to take it a couple of times. I just want to say, first of all, she has to see this through and she has to pass. Like, there's no option, there's no— yeah. I mean, she's made it her whole personality. She's already missed out on like hours and hours of her family and her children for this test. It means she has to.

That's how I feel like. But I just want to say, on the John F. Kennedy Jr. point, like, he has no— he had no other options in life other than to take the bar, become a lawyer, and like follow that political path. Like, for Kim, this was meant to be a hobby, really. She has—

it's become more trouble than it's worth.

She has 8 other careers. Like, John F. Kennedy would have had no career No, I mean she has to do it not because of her career, but because of the time she's already put in.

And we know her obsession with like proving people wrong. She got a lot of flack for like skirting— she's got a lot of flack for like skirting the system because she didn't go to law school, she did like the internship.

And so maybe she needs to go to law school.

I just want to say, some of the dumbest people I know have passed the bar. Like, is she okay? It's because she didn't go to law school.

Yeah, I guess now that she's trying to do law school like vis-à-vis tutors, but most people go to law school and then pass the bar, they dedicate—

no, and Jackie, most people go to law school and then actively work at a law firm during, as like a paralegal and shit, during those years that like passing the bar is like not even hard.

Yeah, yeah, but trying to pass the bar while also an actress running Skims, an influencer, a celebrity, like she can't fail again.

Like she literally can't fail again the next time she takes it. So maybe she knows that she has like a really busy next couple of months and that if she were to take it, she wouldn't pass. But like she needs to, like, just for her public image, like she's obsessed with proving people wrong. She's obsessed with what people think about her.

At this point, I don't even feel like she's proving people wrong. Like it's really just her versus herself versus the bar exam.

Like, no, she knows a lot of criticism, not from us, but like from the internet.

No, at this point no one is like critiquing her harder than herself. Like no one is more invested in, in her. She has to prove to herself that she can do this. It's really not about what people are saying. Everyone's sort of moved on.

Yeah, I just don't understand like working that hard if you don't have to.

Yeah, because she has to pass because like then it would make every hour that she spent like really irrelevant. Yeah, and that's a big pill to swallow because we've seen her on the show, she's studying on set breaks and she's, you know, spending missing days, missing birthday parties. Yeah, um, but if it were all that to fail, if it were me Personally, I would—

you would cut your losses?

I would cut my losses. But like, that's why perhaps like I'm not destined for like greatness, greatness beyond greatness, and I'll just have like an ordinary life.

Yeah, I'm definitely destined for goodness. Like, for goodness, I will try to a point within reason.

That's probably the difference between me and her and Kim Kardashian, right? And I'm okay with that. That's the thing, like, I'm okay with goodness. Yes, that would, that would be beautiful to have some goodness.

She needs to team up with Mike from Suits because he used to like take the L's out for people. And just, it's just a formality at this point. She's not going to be anyone's real lawyer, so just—

yeah. And then also, yeah, when she passes the bar, like, then what?

I don't know.

I guess she can like be more, um, effective in her criminal justice reform, but it's like she has the people who do that. You don't have to do everything.

She has lawyers, right?

I don't know, I just feel that she's sort of like in a rough spot.

Definitely. I bet she wishes she never started this stupid journey.

It has been so many years at this point. Yeah, like so many hours. Yeah, yeah, awkward. Yeah, but I just want like— if I just want her to know like it, it's okay to give up. And I do think in general like sometimes it's okay to give up.

Yeah, oh, agreed.

Not all the time, you know, don't be a giver-upper, but no one would ever accuse you of that. But like it's okay once in a while to just give up. Yeah, but she never will.

And like, the internet won't either, because like, I forgot about this, but now I'm remembering that she didn't pass, and it's still something. But like, if they keep reporting on it, like, they— it won't— the internet and the media won't let people forget. Like, it won't— they won't let this quietly go into the night.

Yeah, I wonder why. This was like a report via TMZ of source saying, so I wonder like where this came from.

And you know TMZ is a Kardashian's outlet of choice, right?

So why did they like wake up and say like, let's let TMZ know Kim's not taking the bar again this year? I have no idea, but I guess they felt the world needed to know.

Well, thank you.

Yeah. Our next story, some more legal news. Blake Lively made no money in the Justin Baldoni settlement, but the legal fight is not quite over yet.

Jeez.

No money changed hands in the settlement between Blake and Justin, but the legal fight is not quite over. Lively still has a pending motion for attorney's fees and damages in connection with Baldoni's failed defamation suit against her. Yeah, because if you sue someone and you lose, you have to pay their bills.

And I—

and did you see that the legal bills are up to $60 million in this?

I did see that.

That's fucking crazy.

I mean, when you think about all the people who were deposed, like Sony, like, this was so big. Um, it's interesting that the settlement was $0. Like, I guess they all just agreed to cut their losses, and like, it was only going to get worse for both of them.

So, um, especially a federal trial would have been insane.

Huge. Like, what a waste of the federal courts' time, honestly.

But like, it would have been every day— pictures, quotes. It would, it would have been bad for both of them. Like, and it makes complete sense that no one had to pay anyone to just end this.

Well, did you see like Lively's Mecca drama? I actually feel bad for her. I did.

We saw that headlines yesterday on the show, like Daily Mail.

No, no, no, something else. Like, so rumors were kind of swirling in a formal capacity that she like wasn't invited. Um, because you— to get to the Met Gala, it's like you have to come with a brand or a designer. She wore Versace, and then Versace posted on her Instagram, their Instagram, you know, Blake Lively wearing Atelier. So I think a lot of people assumed like she was at the 100, you know, her $100,000 seat was paid for by Versace. But then Vanity Fair came out with like the official list of attendees and invitees, and she wasn't on it. So people were like, she showed up uninvited. When actually then Deux Moximo reported today, confirmed that she was actually a guest of Anna Wintour. And I guess Anna can invite whoever she wants at her discretion.

Of course she can. Yeah.

And they are like old school. She's like an OG Met Gala.

I saw, I saw that people were saying she wasn't invited. I did not believe it for one second. She's an OG Anna Swirly. She can go. It would be like saying Sarah Jessica Parker wasn't invited to the Met Gala.

Correct.

She is the Met Gala.

Was she there?

She was not there. Oh, I don't know.

Andy must have been devastated.

Oh yeah, he missed out. Unless they're sticking it to the Bezos's, maybe, which the Bezos's really noticed. Yeah, from their $500 million yacht. Yeah, they were bummed SJP wasn't there.

Either— I could see like Laura Nicole Sanchez loving Andy.

You think so?

Yeah, she's just a girl.

I don't know, but if she loved Andy, like, I feel like she's sort of like not in Andy's worlds.

Well, I feel like actually at one point she would have been great, because before she was Mrs. Bezos, like, she was still like a real hustler, gal about town, and married to a very wealthy— I mean, comparatively he's a popper, but, uh, a pretty wealthy— she could have been like a potential castmate for Beverly Hills. She actually would have been good in her former life.

Yeah. Yeah, but I—

but alas, she had other plans for herself.

Yeah, she dreamt bigger. She dreamed it. What's it called? What's that saying?

Dream it and it will be, or whatever.

She treat—

like, she believed she could, so she did. We need to make like an inspirational quote with like a picture of that. Yeah, and that quote, she believes she could.

So she did.

And she, and she literally did.

It's so true.

It's such a good quote.

She's such an inspiration.

She really is.

Kim needs a little of that to believe that she can pass the bar.

And she will.

I think like if she took the bar twice a year every year for the rest of her life, she would eventually pass the bar, right? Just like she would have the questions by accident.

Yeah. But like on Kardashians when she like went to a hotel and spent the weekend away from her kids and was like getting massages, like all this, and then she She's seriously so funny. Like, why is she doing all that?

I don't know. I don't know.

Massages, like, that was—

she's like in—

like, didn't she miss someone's birthday party?

Like, constantly in conference rooms, like, stressed to the nines. She like threw her back out with her index cards. She threw her back out studying for the test. She said she couldn't sit, like, the stress of it. Just stop. Enjoy your life. Like, life is short. Don't spend it studying for the bar if you don't need to become a lawyer.

It's true, like you're literally a billionaire. Like you have the privilege of not having to do all this shit. Like, so why are you doing it? Why are you on a Hulu set filming a turnt show with Sarah Paulson? Even though my new vocals, Tim, have you seen that video?

Jackie Pataia. Yeah, what is that?

When Kim is doing press for All Is Fair with Sarah Paulson, who's like literally her best friend in the world, they're doing press with this very, I wanna say she's like Welsh, she has a really thick accent and they're in the UK and she's asking Kim like cute questions about like UK culture. 'You like a jacket potato?' And she's saying jacket potato, which is just a baked potato. And Sarah Paulson like understands, but Kim is like— she literally has no idea what the woman said. So she's like, 'A jacket potato? You never had a jacket potato?' And then Sarah Paulson's like, 'Kim, yeah, you've never had a jacket potato? It's the best clip ever.' That's funny. And they can't stop laughing. Like, they— and then Kim's like, 'Oh, a baked potato? Yes, sour cream, cheese.' Once she understands, it was really funny.

Yum, a baked potato is yum. Um, doesn't do it for me. I'm not surprised.

A fried potato is more my speed, like a french fry dairy. Correct.

Are you ready for our next story? Yeah, some cute news. Travis Kelce says he can't wait for this element of his wedding to Taylor Swift. So on new heights this week, Travis and Jason.

Oh wait, I missed this. I'm like, I'm kind of blushing.

It's actually— it's gonna be a hard one for you to swallow because their was Rory McIlroy, and it was actually Rory McIlroy who said the cute thing.

So it's impossible. It's literally— you have the— you read it wrong.

Just wait, it's really cute. Give like— hold space, okay?

Okay.

Because McIlroy, who won the Masters again this year, was discussing the honor of hosting the tournament's annual Masters Champions Dinner when he mentioned the nuptials. He said, Travis, you'll feel this this year whenever you're sitting at your wedding. You have all of the people in a room from like It's so amazing. It's to have all these people in the same room from your childhood, and it's surreal. It's unbelievable. The only thing that I can compare it to is your wedding day because it's like all of this collection of people in the same room. It's like wild. And Travis replied, I can't wait.

Stop. I like this story. Got significantly less cute when you told me Rory McIlroy was involved.

Like, but it's a cute sentiment to think about. Like everyone that you know in your life, they probably like, they're never gonna all be together. They don't know each other, but like they are at your wedding. That's like really beautiful. Makes you like— can justify spending all that money. Yeah, you know, I like—

yeah, I'm really excited. I'm just trying to like move past the Roy Mackler.

Like, why did he hate him so much?

It's a good question.

Was there a something? How does Ben feel about him?

Like hates, because it's like you're always rooting for an American and he's like always winning. It's annoying. It's like why people hate LeBron, like just because he's good.

I understand.

Also, your faves are never gonna win because like he's always over here winning.

Have you seen like this stuff about LIV Golf drama?

What, they're like over?

Yeah, it's like over. They like defunded it.

Oh man, you're seriously like 5 years late. I'm cracking up. Yeah, they like merged.

No, they merged, that's different, but then there were still players like living, but like The Saudis aren't funding LIV Golf anymore. It's like done.

Oh, so all that for nothing.

All that for nothing. And all— not really.

Well, the people who like stood their ground and didn't take $500 million deals just for like this whole thing to be over in a few years, like you should have taken the money.

No, I feel like the opposite. They look like sellouts.

Well, I often think like what I would do in a situation like that because I love— genuinely love money more than anything in this world. But I am like a deeply, unfortunately, like, scrupled person. So if I knew that like this $100 million— but it has to be like, these are people who like, $100 million is a lot, but they also have $100 million.

They probably have $30 million and they're giving—

okay, so like, no, I would take it.

Like, I know all your net worth.

I like to think that I'm better than that, but like, in actuality, I'm really— okay, I'm tripling my net worth. I have a family.

Like, I don't think that you would.

Well, I know because you wouldn't let me. No, but I think that if I were born in a different family, I would have.

I know you. I like know us offline, and I just know you.

You wouldn't do it. I'm— I would love to have a second home one day.

Like, okay, so it'll be a smaller home.

Great.

I just— I know you, Turdsville. But anyways, I look forward to getting the whole situation explained.

Oh, but then do I have to like go to Saudi Arabia?

I don't know, like, do you have to go to—

I didn't think about that part. I thought like they would just pay me in the US, but if it involves travel, there might be like tour stops. There might be like Riyadh Comedy Festival where all those comedians were like getting canceled.

Would you have done that?

No, because you have to go.

Yeah, if they said we'll like bring the Nlog tour to Riyadh.

No, as like a chesty Jewess, like, I'm not going to Saudi Arabia. Like, sorry, I'm just not. Okay, so scrupled, scared, more so scared, more so scared, if I'm being honest. But like, if the money was just wired and I had to just participate in like Saudi activities in the States, oh bitch, it's on.

Okay, okay, so that's where you draw the line.

Yeah, if I have to physically go, I can't.

That part I don't know. I don't know where the, where the tour stops are. For Liv, right? Well, anyways, like, hopefully it's in this season of Full Swing because I don't want to wait till next year to understand what happened. But I do think, net-net, like, it's not good for the Liv players. I think they look like idiots.

They get insane guests on that New Heights podcast, like, it's wild. Yeah, Leonardo— like, and people who've never done a podcast before in their life. Leonardo DiCaprio sitting down being like, what is this?

I kind of want to listen to it because it's like, it's really hard to do like remote podcast interview.

Mm-hmm.

Like, and have a great interview.

So there are a couple of podcasts that are just absolutely slay the remote game. I don't know if, oh, you probably didn't see this, but this TikTok kind of went like viral of a girl being like, I cannot believe that Jackie and Claudia live in different states. Like, she, and it was one of the best like feelings ever for me. This girl was like, wait, did everybody know this? They're not in the same room. She was like, but it looks like it too. Cause she watches, she doesn't even just listen. She watches.

Yeah.

I don't know of a higher compliment, honestly.

Yeah, that's really great. So I would put us in the category of like slaying the remote.

The greats. Absolutely. It's new heights. They do a really good job. No lag. I don't know a single other podcast— I'm trying to think—

that slays remote podcasting.

But we don't do interviews. They do. That's really impressive. It's impossible to do a Zoom interview. It's miserable.

Good Guys must do pretty good on remote. They have our setup.

They do. They copied us. Yeah, so, but they're like still in the TNN family.

Yeah, so TNN crushes remote podcasting. I was like, we should become a network for remote podcasters.

That's kind of a good idea.

It is.

It's very niche, except that like I have no ambition these days. Like, I, I was just talking about this. I am so leaning in. Actually, I was just playing mahjong, and you know, a lot of my friends are moms. Some of them are full-time moms, some of them are working moms. And one of my friends was talking about like, you know, she's kind of feeling like she wants to leave the workforce. She has 3 kids. I'm like, do it. Like, I'm so toxic. Like my personal experience with motherhood has been like, it drained me of any ambition. And I love it. And I feel like at first I was like, wait, no, I have— was I kind of fighting that feeling? That's why I did The Masked Singer. Like, I was fighting the feeling. I was like, no, no, because I've always been like, we have to go, we have to be here, we have to do this. And now I'm leaning in like a little too hard. I keep like pulling out stuff and like canceling. Like, but, but like, I just don't want to work. Like, I just want to do the minimum to pay my bills, which is showing up and doing this show.

Yeah, no, and I will do this. I will— don't worry, guys, like, I will never not do this.

Yeah, this is the perfect amount, you know, and running the Toast and everything that comes with it, it like— because it gives you that creative outlet, which I think if you didn't have as a mom would be hard for someone like you who's so creative.

Yeah.

Um, but it allows you to really be like a full-time mom outside of this. Um, but I think you'll also get to a phase where right now it's like you still think, I know I should do that, so you say yes and then you cancel. But in a couple months you'll be at a place where I know I need to say no to everything.

Yeah.

So it's just sort of an awkward phase.

Yeah, it is. It's transitional. So if you see me at an event and then they like cancel, like, that's why.

No, I also, I'm in a place where it's like, I keep thinking like in 3 months or in 6 months, like my life is gonna look completely different. I'm gonna have my shit together. I can do this, that, and the other thing. And then those things roll around and I'm like, no, I can't.

Of course I can't. Am I crazy?

What was I thinking? And it's been that way for 4 years.

Because I went to, I hosted like a fireside chat with, with, um, the moderator Rosalind Medina, and I was talking about this and she's like OG hustler blogger girl, and I was like, no, I literally have no ambition, and like, and I love it, like, and I, and I, I want to talk about it because I feel like that happens to women and you're just like, you're supposed to, you're not, you're supposed to, you're supposed to feel bad and you're supposed to think, well, that's wrong because like I can't lose my career, it's good. Yeah. And it's like, well, yeah, but it's okay if you don't want to, like, it's absolutely okay.

Um, And then she was just like, but also it's like, it's worth mentioning, it's not like sit around and eat bonbons all day. It's to like be a mother, you know, which like there's no more worthy job in the world.

It's to be a mother and eat bonbons at the same time, holding space for two things and sit around. Absolutely. Because I'm not getting back on the floor. My back is still really bad. Like, yeah, I have an Icy Hot on now. I'm in hell.

Yeah, so then what did she say?

Oh, she was like, oh, that's so funny, a total opposite for me. Like, the second I gave birth— and she said it was because she had girls maybe— and like, she's like, the girls gave her like this insane intense ambition, like, to go achieve. And I was like, oh, opposite for me, slide.

Oh, I guess like because maybe you want your daughters to like see what a woman can do.

Yeah. And whereas like I'm prepping my son to have just like a, a concubine, a wife, like literally I make been to everything. Like, we had that meeting in Florida, I sent Ben to meet you. Like, I just want to be home. Like, and you know what, I'm, I'm finally like leaning in. I'm like, that's good. Like, it's good. I just— it was— it's so polar opposite who I was before I had a baby. So it's like, it's been a transition and it was a tough one to swallow. But now I'm like telling all my friends, I'm like, you should quit. Like, you should literally quit.

You're like Emily Blunt.

Absolutely.

Yeah, good advice. Nice.

Yeah.

Um, are you ready for our fourth story? Mhm. Lizzo is speaking out about her lawsuits. She said the truth will come out in court. So Lizzo is not backing down from her legal issues. In fact, she's leaning all the way in, saying she's ready to take the stand and let the truth speak for herself. She sat down with CBS News host Gayle King for an interview that aired on Monday, and she made her stance clear. She's not settling, not hiding, and definitely not scared of what might come out in court. She said she is not scared of the the truth. So backstory: a group of her former dancers claimed she created a toxic work environment, accusing her of sexual harassment, weight shaming, and putting them in uncomfortable situations on tour. Lizzo says when she first got hit with the lawsuit, her reaction was simple— it's not true. But she didn't go firing back publicly right away, explaining that she felt a responsibility to keep it measured because of what she represents to fans. Still, don't get it twisted, she's fighting this thing all the way through. Despite having the option to settle, she says that's not happening, calling that the easy way out and insisting she's standing firm because she believes the claims against her are flat out false.

She doubled down on denying specific accusations, including fat shaming allegations, while acknowledging the case is ongoing and limiting how much she can say. Oh, classic. Let me do like a huge interview and let you know that I'm in the middle of my life and speak about it.

Um, you know what's so funny?

She also— like, Gayle asked her if she would testify if it goes to trial. Lizzo didn't hesitate. She said absolutely. Adding that she would look fabulous doing it. She said the truth will come out.

So, you know, a couple of weeks ago we were having the conversation about people who have like actually successfully been canceled. Remember Matilda Jerv? We need to add Lizzo. We should start a list because for the most part I feel like cancel culture is just like— it's a part of the ecosystem we live in. Like, you have to have it in order. But there are some people who it genuinely wipes out, and I feel like Lizzo was one of those people. I don't know if you even know this, but she like still very actively and frequently releases music.

No, I didn't know that. But like, is the music good?

Because it's all like— all of her music is just good, like radio hits, right?

But like, if she's releasing bops, like, you can't stop the bops.

It's a little bit dated. I think a lot of her music is like that, like, self-love anthem over and over and over again, um, which is like— feels a little— I feel it's also why, like, um, what's her name, Meghan Trainor, is like struggling a little bit. It's just like a corny old style of music that people aren't like drawn to anymore. But you know You know, every now and then even Meghan Trainor has a hit. I just feel like Lizzo really can't get arrested. I feel like when we talk about people who have been successfully canceled, we don't talk about Lizzo, but she really has.

Yeah, and I do think it's more so like the people, because sometimes you get canceled by like the industry and they won't, they won't touch you, but like people still like you, you know?

Right. Other times, by the way, people like that do find their way back into the industry, because if you have a huge fan base who like wants to see you in movies or whatever the industry does often come crawling back. Sometimes the industry refuses to cancel someone and the people are like, are you fucking serious? We don't want to see this rapist in a movie, stop.

Yeah, so sometimes like the industry, they still prop this person up, but like nobody's watching their stuff, buying their stuff, whatever. Like it's kind of giving Balenciaga, um, right? And I do feel that way about Lizzo, the fact that she's on CBS News with Gayle King. Like if she were an actual like person—

no, I feel like the industry actually has also sort of let her go. You don't see her like performing at award shows or like doing gigs. Like, I think the audience and the industry has sort of like— they were going to wait to see what happened with the trial, and then we also just like— like everyone stopped caring, you know?

She's also a pop star. Like, you can't really stop for too long of a time.

Yeah, I think it was a combo of both.

But I also think it's like what the allegations are against her is so the antithesis of her brand. It's so the antithesis of her brand that like, if she doesn't— if those things are not true about her brand, She has no brand. Like, she has nothing.

It's the Ellen of it all. Like, you can't have a show about kindness and be the nastiest bitch on the planet. You can't be a body-positive queen who's calling all your dancers fat. Like, yeah, so JVN, you can't be like, you know, the feelings person and then the evil person. Yeah, yeah, you can't do both. And I think those are like a lot of really effective cancelations, is when we find out that your real persona is the polar opposite of who you've been preaching.

Everything you've built yourself up on. So it's like, take those things away and you have nothing. Interesting. Whereas sometimes someone like turns out to be like a diva or whatever, but it's like, oh, they never seemed like super nice. That's not why we like them, we like their music, whatever.

Correct.

Um, so this trial should be interesting. I mean, you know, if the truth is on her side, then she deserves justice. But I do think regardless, like, it's kind of bananas that it's going to trial, don't you find?

It's bananas. I would agree. I find that as well. At the end of the day, when people— when somebody like rides so hard for themselves, like, I, I am inclined to believe her only because she had an opportunity to settle, she didn't, she's, you know, doing press. So I do believe her, but like, why would a dancer lie about it, you know? Like, I don't know, it's a tough situation.

Yeah, it is. Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

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Thank you, turds.

You're welcome, jerk.

Our fifth and final story that will lead into the little Summer House recap is that Summer House's KJ Dillard reads Wes Wilson's post-reading apology text to him live on air on Watch What Happens Live last night.

So let me tell you that I didn't find last night's episode of Summer House even like remotely interesting. Um, what happened? Well, it was at the very end where Lindsay had her second annual Freedom Dinner. She was being so funny. She brought up with Kyle, like, again, he he's going on tour. Do you think that's good for your wife? You claim you want to start a family. And everyone's just sort of piling on Kyle. Amanda's just sitting there. And Kyle— this happened all at the last 30 seconds, so the driveway fight that's been teased happens next week because Carl and him get up and whatever. It's not even a fight between Carl and Kyle, it's a fight between Lindsay and Kyle. And he just looks at Amanda and he goes, fuck you. It was really crazy. And the whole table, everybody gets up. Wes picks up his chair and moves it next to Amanda and like just like sits next to her. Amanda's like smiling, she's like not even affected. Um, but before that, like, like literally nothing happened. I'm actually trying to think.

Yeah, it was just like whatever on Watch What Happens Live.

So I happen to actually really like KJ. Um, I did not like what he did on Watch What Happens Live, and let me tell you why. And it's funny that this is the story because like that was my main takeaway. First of all, he whispering on Watch What Happens Live. I could not hear anyone else. Jamie Lynn Sigler was talking at a normal volume. I had to increase the volume every time KJ spoke. So the question was, because, you know, he had made a couple of tweets that, like, you know, Wes never apologized to him, like, you know, centering himself. And so Andy was like, by the way, have you heard from Wes? And KJ was like, actually, yes, he texted me after the reunion, but, you know, I had such bad anxiety, it's literally like I haven't even opened it. It's been unopened in my phone for the last last week.

Yeah, this is what he said. He said, I didn't even look at the message. I was a bit scared to look at it. I still haven't looked at it. There's only one unread message in my inbox and it's his. So then Andy—

then like Andy asked, but then Andy was also like, you don't have to, because it really was like an invasion. Um, KJ was more than happy to do it, which like, that's your friend. And I know Wes has made a lot of mistakes, but it's kind of like what we say about Jesse. Like, if that's your best friend, like, of course you can hold him accountable, but you don't have to like leave him out to dry.

Yeah.

And it just felt like KJ like was just a little too excited to like, I don't know, expose his friend when in the end, at the end of the day, West's text was actually quite lovely.

Yeah, this is what the text—

it was so personal and it really should not have been read on—

and it's like, it's worrisome that KJ hadn't read it before because it's like, you don't know what's in there and you're really going to read this live on television.

They went to an audience Q&A and Andy said, read it, and if you don't want to share it, you don't have to, um, but if you want to, you can. And so he read it and then said he wanted to share it.

This is it. I wanted to thank you for your articulation and kindness yesterday despite being hurt. I've been off social and I think I lost touch with how much hurt there was. I'm incredibly sorry. Also sending you love in regards to your mental health. You shared a lot yesterday and I know it mightn't carry much weight now, but I'm always rooting for the best for you. I know it will take some time, but whenever you feel like you're ready, lunch or a phone call would mean a lot in the spirit of healing. No need to respond, take your time. After he shared the text, KJ admitted that it hurt to review that. He said it just hurts because it's like, me and him were so close.

I mean, as terms— in terms of like how apology texts can go, that's a pretty stellar one, if I'm being honest. So the reading of it on TV, I just feel— I honestly thought it was really unnecessary and rude. And I felt like Andy regretted asking KJ to do that, and so he said like, you don't have to. But KJ was like genuinely more than happy to. Um, I don't know, I just didn't like it.

Like, no, it's a bad look. I, I—

especially like, you came on the show as KJ's as West's friend.

They have prior history.

Prior history. Are they both from St. Louis, or like, they have something? Um, I don't know, I just— it was icky. It was mean. And like, not me here defending West. Like, West is on his podcast with Sophie Cunningham. Like, I saw this morning, Business as Usual, that's talking about the reunion and the leaks, like, in a very, um, like, sober way.

Yeah, he's emotional. He talked about the reunion. He said it was like just very dark form of therapy. You know, there's never really a situation in life where where you are exposed to hearing like how much feedback about your actions like affect everybody. So like it's just a lot, but you know, time will start to heal and the reunion, this is just the first step, which is true. Um, and as much as like they did a bad thing, they did do a bad thing, like everybody else making it about them being like so affected, it's just a lot, you know? And yeah, I feel like with Scandal that happened a lot. The two of them had been together for like 10 years and Lala and everybody like making the moment about like their podcast and whatnot, and everybody was so mad because they were like deceived for a very long time. Him and Ariana were together for 10 years. They were hooking up during the season. Like, it was— the deception was insane, like deep psychopathic levels. You could never trust these people again. Um, I do believe the timeline of Amanda and Wes. I think they had like a month or so where they were lying about it because they were trying to figure it out.

And like, why do you need to tell someone? Like, I understand they shouldn't have lied. I understand why they did, but that's not what they should have done. And just, it's just everyone just doing like the most and like being so hurt. Like, just stop.

Well, Jesse Solomon was like breaking my heart on last night's episode because, you know, I'm telling you, he's in like his sad boy era. There's just like a— there's a brokenness inside of him. And last night he was like, you know what it is? It's like, I just feel so lonely, and I think I'm like trying to fix that with these relationships, and I keep going after the wrong people, like Sierra. Um, but there's like a brokenness inside of me. That I need to fix. He was quite self-reflective.

He also brought everyone to this camp for, you know, who would have been there for him?

Lexi. He brought everyone to like this camp where like, you know, kids with cancer can go and like spend the summers with their siblings, and it was so cute. They all were like volunteering. It was actually like so sweet. I forgot that about Jesse, that he had cancer, and it was just like, I don't know if he went to this camp, what his connection was, but it was really sweet.

That is really—

and the big banner moment from the episode is that, you know, they do a beach day And everyone's talking about everyone. Mia and Amanda are sitting on beach chairs just talking about like, you know, it feels like Sierra and West are like kind of moving quickly back to something because, you know, they had that double date. Or like, it's just like— and they're talking about how, you know, he needs to be so different. And Amanda's like, and like, she's such a special type. This is what Amanda said, like, Sierra is such a special type of girl. Like, he has to do a complete, like, you know, 180, uh, lobotomy, like, to be right for her. And if he doesn't, like, you don't understand, like, I ride for Sierra. Like, if Sierra said to me, like, we're cutting off West, like, I would never talk to West again. Yeah, it was really crazy.

Yeah, that's what's crazy about this season. It's just like watching how far she digs this hole for herself.

And the editing is— now you can tell, like, this is so post-Scamanderball editing because everything— every time Wes does something, they cut to Amanda. Every time Amanda— like, they're being really funny about it. Um, and like, they're just— the music, like, when she said that, it was like, okay. Um, yeah, but it wasn't like a crazy episode. Okay, well, the big driveway fight happens next week, and I don't even know why Carl and Kyle would be fighting because Kyle gets so upset at this dinner. They're having dinner in the house, um, because everyone's attacking him for like DJing and not being like a real— and I get like he can't articulate his emotions, but, but now knowing what we know, he's basically saying like, oh, you're all coming at me for like not being a family man, but like she doesn't even want to have a family with me. Like, we're not in a real marriage. Like, this is fraudulent. Moment. Um, but instead he just says fuck you to Amanda, and so everybody's like, girl, are you okay? So he storms out and Carl chases after him trying to calm him down. And then I guess next week we'll see like him calming him down turns into a fight between the two of them.

I have no idea.

Yeah, no, it's crazy what the like reaction would have been to Carl— Kyle this morning had Wes Mandeville not happened, because yeah, that's a horrible thing to say to your wife.

Of course. And it was just like the way he said it also was like extremely— it was like, fuck you.

Yeah, like, it was like he meant every syllable and every line, every consonant.

Yeah, so chilling.

Yeah, now everyone's like, yeah, fuck you.

Yeah. All right, let's dive into Dear Toasters, our weekly advice segment where Jackie and I try to help back and, you know, help out our community. If you guys ever need advice and you think, you know, what would those savvy young things over at the Toast think, well, you can write us an email, deartoasters@gmail.com, or head over to our website, thetoastpodcast.com, to get your submission read online. Of course, we always keep it anonymous and we'll do our best to help you out. Are you You ready, Jax?

I'm ready, turd.

Dear Toasters, I— this is an emergency, please help me. Here's some context: my husband and I have an 11-week-old daughter. My husband's grandfather has been in prison for 5 years for sex crimes against a teenager, a teenage relative. He's up for parole this week. My husband and his family believe he is innocent, but he was convicted on multiple counts and has already been denied parole twice. If he's released, he'll— he will move in with my in-laws and be registered as a Tier 3 sex offender. This means a registered sex offender could be living in the same home where our daughter would normally go for holidays, parties, sleepovers, and my husband's family is acting like this is not a concern. How do I keep my daughter safe in this situation? Like, no, it's, it's giving no contact.

I'm sorry, giving—

you'll have to go, you'll have to go somewhere else for the holidays.

It's giving no is a full sentence.

Yeah, I don't think you need to explain yourself. It's nice that they believe he's innocent, and let's say worst case scenario he is. Like, you did everything you can to protect your daughter. Like, you shouldn't feel bad about that for one second. Like, good, good day, sir.

It's, it's going to be a no from me. You could have Christmas at your house, invite your in-laws, of course.

Everyone's welcome except for Grandpa.

Granny. Daddy old Grandpa.

Yeah.

No, kindly no.

Yeah, oh, and your husband's gonna have to get on board real fucking quick.

Oh yeah.

This needs to be like, you can't even negotiate.

Not even like, okay, we'll stay for like an hour and he never is like, it gets so weird.

And then she can be on my lap. No, no. It's no. You'll host at your house, you can go to your family's, we'll just take a vacation, I don't give a fuck, okay? Yeah, no, that was an easy one.

Yeah.

Hey girlies, I need advice on what to do. My husband and I moved into a new house, and while unpacking some boxes, I found a bunch of old notebooks. While flipping through them to see if they were anything important, I found that one, one that appeared to be a journal that my husband kept. The last entry was about how unhappy he was in our relationship. The entry was dated 2 months before he proposed. We've been now married for 2 years. We have a 6-month-old. Things between us have been good, but I was really sad and surprised to read that just 2 months before he proposed he was so unhappy. It makes me feel icky about the proposal. Do I bring it up? Do I let it go since things seem fine and he has not written in it since? I don't want him to be angry that I read his journal in the first place. Thanks.

Irrelevant.

Irrelevant, of course, given the date. And also, like, you're really not ever allowed to be mad at something someone wrote in their journal because people are allowed to have thoughts.

Yeah.

And you reading it— and I, I believe you when you say it was an accident. Sure.

It wasn't. No, I, I like—

of course everyone sees who's important.

Like, you knew, you knew immediately it was a journal, and then you went to the last entry. Like, please be honest with us, girl.

We see you, we see you. It's fine. Yeah, don't lie to us, okay? Lie to your journal. Um, so you can't be mad when you read someone's journal because first of all, that's such a fucking invasion of privacy. It's like one of the most invasive things you can do. Sorry you didn't like what you saw, but he obviously was just like working through stuff because he did decide to propose, and now you have a family, and like you say, it's all good. Don't make trouble.

It's like, I'm sure at one point I was like— also, like, issues that you have before you're engaged, like dating issues, like they— some— most of them, like, work themselves out, you know.

I thought in college, being like, uh, this guy— and it was Ben— like, you know.

Yeah, no, but like, the issues that you have at present, whatever they are, they're actually like different issues usually than like what it— at least for me, like, than the things when you were dating. And so, like, you guys are a whole new family. You're a new couple. Like, it's really irrelevant. And sometimes like some things can be solved when you do like decide to commit to somebody, you know, and like propose and like start a life and start a family. And like some of those other things get washed away. Like it's literally irrelevant.

Yeah. And like you, what are you gonna say? Hey, I was reading your journal.

I'm sure if you mentioned it to him, he might not even remember what you're talking about.

He, and like he, I, I gather that he's not a person who like continuously and frequently journals. So he was just like going through it. He had like a rough couple of months and he journaled.

Like, yeah, he had a hard day. So like he wrote something out 'cause you had a fight or something. Like irrelevant.

Irrelevant. Agree, Jackie's right. Like premarital relationship issues, barring, you know, like cheating, like a serial cheater, like they work themselves out.

Like if you found out that 2 months before you got engaged, like Ben was like struggling in your relationship, like what would that mean to you today?

I don't know, but like it doesn't change where you're at today. Let me actually think. If Ben like had written a journal— no, it would have been fine.

Well, you're also like, you're very, um, I'm so emotional. Yeah, you're very intense and sensitive. Yeah, I'm very like rational, pragmatic. Yeah. And so like, even though if something might hurt, I'm like, I won't let it if rationally I shouldn't, you know?

Yeah. And sometimes for me, when emotions are involved, like, ration has no place.

Yeah. But like, no, seriously, that was 10 years ago. If you found out that 2 months before, he was just like having like a bunch of feelings Yeah, it's fine. I guess it would be like sort of disruptive because that's so against your narrative. Like, it's so against like the story of your relationship.

We tell ourselves, yeah, yeah.

And so I can understand why for you that would be disruptive, but I don't know the story of this girl's relationship. You want a lot of people like, you know, like bumps, bumps along the way. So I don't think that it should be that disruptive. But you know what, I think for you, don't—

it, it can be Yes. Okay, thank you.

That would be like— that would be weird to find out because he like proposed so soon. So it was like—

no, of course it was a whirlwind romance. What are you talking about? It's perfect. All right, our third and final. Hey girlies, so I've been dating my boyfriend for about 9 months now. Everything has been fabulous. He's 100% a P'Jom. Sure. We just ran into our first problem, and I'm not sure if it's a deal breaker or not. His dad and stepmother had a backyard barbecue over the weekend, um, um, and this was the first time meeting his side of the family. After dinner, my boyfriend, his brother, and his stepsister and I changed into swimsuits. We had drinks by the pool in the hot tub. After a few drinks, his brother made a joke about my boyfriend sleeping with the stepsister years ago. I was shocked and grossed out. The next day I asked him about it and he explained that they were in college and it was one drunk hookup. I'm still extremely grossed out, but I don't know if this is breakup worthy. Help.

That's just like so unfortunate because like it's not breakup worthy. It's not really like that he hooked up with his stepsister.

Well, I need to know when the parents got married. Is this a stepsister who you lived in the same house with and grew up with, or like when you guys were both grown in college, like your parents started dating and so you guys met and like, yeah, maybe for a minute you're like, oh, our parents get married and then like we, you know. Yeah, uh, but, or did you guys go to like middle school together and sleep in the same house?

Yeah, of course.

But say that's the case— I just want to say, if that's the case, that's a deal breaker.

That's disgusting. Um, but say it's not. Say it's like their parents met when they were in college, so they met.

Yeah, I have to say, I think it's disgusting, and I do think it's a deal breaker. I really do. And I know it's hard— I know it's hard to get a boyfriend, and so like, we have to be like— I, I think people are too into ick culture and deal breaker culture, so I try to be, you know, a little strict with my deal breaker cards. But I'm handing you a deal breaker card. Like, I think I think in no world is this normal.

I'm sorry, I need more backstory and information because it's like—

like, I actually have decided I don't want more backstory and information because I think this is icky.

Like, it is, it's uncomfortable. Of course it's uncomfortable. It's not ideal. And you know, if they did do this, they should have never told anyone and took it to their graves. Absolutely. The whole family knows that. Like, this is very uncomfortable. No, and now you have to—

every family event, you're gonna be around a girl that your boyfriend slept with. Like, I'm sorry, this is wrong and bad and deal breaker.

Yeah, I don't know.

Sorry.

What if like he's really—

well, unless he's wealthy, then the one, you know. He's not. I don't know, it's only been 9 months.

Maybe you could like find other reasons to break up with him, you know, like, like start like making a list. I just feel like sleeping with your sister's a pretty good reason.

Like, I feel good about that.

We all loved Clueless, okay?

Different?

Not at all. They actually grew up like siblings.

No, they never grew up in the same house.

When— no, no, but he used to come over as the brother.

Very unnecessary, like, plot twist was like, why couldn't he just have been like an intern for the dad? Why did he have to be the dad's ex-wife's kid, right? That's what it was.

Yeah. Yes, but he like came over, you know, a week every week, like as her older brother, you know. It was a brotherly relationship.

Um, he should have just been the neighbor who had like an interest in law.

Yeah. And I guess it's like, if you're gonna do this, it has to be your person. Like, if they're gonna have sex, the two of them, like, they need to get married because then it's fine. If they got married, their parents are married, that's just like a cute funny story.

Cute.

Yeah. Um, but you can't just do it to have sex, like, and look at— like, that was really stupid. So it's not even just about the icky that he did that with his sister. Like, that was such a stupid move to have sex with someone that is going to be in your family for a long time.

And when we talk about, like, siblings— no, like, step whatever— there's only one right way to do it. And if you've ever seen the movie Because I Said So, Mandy Moore starts dating Gabriel Macht, who has, like, oh, you know who his dad is? The guy who's in prison from 7th Heaven. What's his name?

Uh, whatever, he plays Gabriel Mock's dad, and Diane Keaton is Mandy Moore's mom.

And so the two of them start dating, and so their parents end up getting set up. The kids have to be first.

Okay, but like, say the parents were first in the movie. The parents are meeting, so they are like bringing everyone together.

Your boyfriend's son. Yeah, okay, it's actually—

it's not bad, it's not bad, it's not bad. However, if they just like had sex once and then both went on their merry way and brought sort of— no, those two need to get married now.

Yeah, I just want to go back to Clueless really quickly because there are so many ways in which it would have been like completely fine, if not better. Because here I have another—

well, it is based on Jane Austen, so—

oh, they were always getting freaky with their cousins.

Yeah, probably.

Um, okay, I have a million alternatives.

Of course, I think we were honoring the text.

It could have been like the neighbor, because you know Cher's mom passed away, and so like maybe it like the neighbor's mom was like best friends with Cher's mom, so like they were like siblings, and they grew up sort of like siblings, neighbors. The mom, they still live next door. And he also wants to become a lawyer, so he started working for Cher's dad. Cher's dad started, you know, seeing him like a son, the son he never had. I just feel like, like there was a million fucking ways I could have done it.

Yeah, no, they didn't want to is the thing. They didn't want to, because of course all those things would have been easier.

You're right.

But they wanted a little brother loving.

Hollywood is sick.

And we've been trying to tell you.

Yeah. Well, that's Dear Toasters. Thank you to everybody who wrote in. deartoasters@gmail.com, or head over to our website, thetoastpodcast.com. Submission box is on the homepage when you scroll down. Both totally anonymous. We would love to hear from you. And that is our show. The place looks great. Well, I mean, it always does.

It always does.

Thank you so much for listening to the Toast of Monday Morning Show, where we deliver the fast stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So you're watching us on YouTube, please don't forget to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as podcast on our podcast feed, found on Spotify, Stitcher, Xbox, all the places where this podcast— 5-star, we are.

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