Transcript of Bombshell Besties: Friday, March 13th, 2026

Good morning, girlies.

It's The Toast.

It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts.

It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly. It's The Toast.

I sound amazing.

Welcome back to The Toast and happy Friday. Yeah, that's right. It's Friday and it's Jackson Turd. Two most, like the most amazing things I could have said. It's Jackson Turd and it's Friday.

I have my own dance now. I don't know if you've seen it.

Oh, did it go viral on TikTok?

It's kind of like a take on the apple.

Oh, you're putting the apple back together.

Yeah. But when she does the apple, is it meant to be?

It's like heartbreaking. Yeah. I think the apple's rotten.

So I'm just doing the apple. Yes.

But no, she's breaking it. You're putting it together.

Yeah. But I just find myself now when I'm talking, like how people like used to wave me, like, like I just go like this, like That's so Gen Z of you.

Say less, bestie.

It's so Gen Z of me. And like, it's meant that the person that I'm engaging with would do the other hand and then we would be whole. Like, I'm just always like, I love you.

So funny. Like, I've never seen you do that to me. Like, that's interesting.

You know, you don't see me.

I don't see you.

You don't see me.

No, bitch, you don't see me. You don't see me. I see you all the fucking time.

Okay. Well, right before we started recording, you sort of dropped a bombshell that you have to drop a bombshell in this episode.

I was saying that today's episode, like, Sometimes Fridays we just sort of like—

you said you wanted to pitch this episode to major news network.

Well, we have a lot to cover today because you have a bombshell. Secret Lives of Mormon Wives came out, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. There's actually just like a lot of news. We have Queenie and Weenie, so it's going to be a nice meaty episode. And I also shared like, yes, I am dropping a bomb, like something crazy happened to me, but you're going to have to wait for Queenie and Weenie of the week because, um, it's unfortunately in— I can't, like, I can't say it right now.

Okay, I, I'm fine to wait.

And I think that'll really entice people to listen to the whole episode.

1,000%. I'm fine to wait. I just want to say it better be good.

It is good. And I just want to say this is the punishment for those who don't follow me on TikTok, because if you were on TikTok, you would have saw the video I already posted.

For those of us who are maintaining our privacy, for those of you who refuse to give your data to the China Communist Party. It's true.

For my fellow commies, we're in the know.

They're in the know. Okay.

Yeah. So you have to wait.

Pros and cons of the commie Party. Pros and cons of being on Tik Tok.

Yeah, you're in the know. But so you just have to wait. But we also do have like a bombshell episode outside of the big Bomb.

Yeah.

That I'm dropping.

Yeah.

Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. What's it from? You can't say bomb on a plane. Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb.

Meet the fuckers. Meet the parents. Yes, the OG The Meet the parents.

Yeah. But he was so crazy. Ben Stiller in that movie. Like, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. Yeah, and then he gets like detained.

Of course, of course.

Like, sometimes it's so funny.

Speaking of, the terrorists were wild in yesterday.

Oh my God, I was like, where is she going with speaking up?

I think that was a good segue.

I guess like as good of a segue as you can about like a shooting at a synagogue.

Yeah, a car ramming— ram the truck through the synagogue preschool, drove down the hallway only to be shot in the head by security. Slay. I can't wait till the literal slay.

Yeah, I'm really looking forward— not funny— to all the details like coming out about who this person is. This here, because I'm ready to like, where's the GoFundMe? Sign me up. Like, I'm ready. Um, so scary.

Like, if not for that security guard, like, this would be— yesterday would have been like seriously such a tragic day.

Yep.

For American people, Jewish people.

Yeah.

Um, thank God.

Thank— like, literally, thank God.

But, and then someone did lose their life yesterday in another terrorist attack at a university. Yeah, what was the name of the school?

Old Dominion.

Old Dominion.

I only know that because, of course, the band—

I didn't know it was a school too.

Me neither.

Such a sad story.

Terrible.

It's crazy. It's really crazy.

So I guess, yeah, that segue was appropriate.

I thought I did a nice job.

Listen, you guys were just doing our best. Like, please.

Um, no, but like, uh, I just—

I know, such a pit.

Such a pit about the—

like, about all of it, but especially about like what could have been.

It was a preschool.

Just— I have like— it was like all— it's a very big— I actually know a lot of people who send their kids there. Like, it's a big, um, compound. It's a temple, it's a preschool. There was preschool was actively in session.

Yeah.

Um, just terrible. Yeah, really, like, seriously, thank the Lord and the security guard.

Yeah. Um, what else happened yesterday?

I watched The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, only the first episode. I have a lot of strong feelings, like extremely strong.

I think I watched like 15 minutes, enough to like see what's going on in the world of Slamu.

And it's just, sometimes when you haven't watched a show in a while, it takes you like a second to get back in. These girls are consummate professionals. Um, the way I'm sat, like, I forgot there's so much to catch up on. I forgot all about the Jordan and Jesse drama. Like, I forgot really about a lot of it. Um, so we're going to talk about it because we need to talk about Michaela and Jayce, like, drama drama.

That will be in the story. So I think like 5th and final story, maybe 4th story will be like the news from Slamu and recap.

I don't have a lot to spoil. I only watched the first episode.

Fifth, right? No, same, but like there's a lot to say. And then fifth we'll do Beverly Hills because we have Beverly Hills stories and we just have like a lot of stories to sum up the week, I would say.

I like when a Friday ends in very full circle.

I would call this episode In Summation if I wanted to be—

if you want to come up with a title already. No, mine would have to be about the bombshell. Well, what's that movie about, um, Megyn Kelly? It's called Bombshell.

Yeah.

Just Bombshell?

I think so.

It's like a bad name for the movie.

Well, I think it was like, I never saw the movie, so like—

You didn't?

No.

It was very good.

Yeah, no, I heard great things. And based on what I think I know, let me tell you why I think it was called Bombshell. One, maybe it was based on a book called Bombshell. Mm-hmm. But one, like, I think the women were bombshells, right?

Oh, double entendre. Yeah.

And two, the scandal was a bombshell.

Yeah, yeah, no, you're right. It was like a couple of bombshell women.

So I think it was a double entendre.

Okay, you're, you're right for that.

For a movie I didn't see.

Yeah.

Maybe I'll watch it.

It was like, it was a movie that felt like a real movie.

Yeah.

And the more I live—

come up like, I'm always looking for movies that are like, you know, were the glory movies of their day, but I didn't get around to watching them. And like, it never come— that's right.

It was a very buzzy Oscar movie, like of the year.

I was like, Interstellar, you know, Interstellar, my new favorite movie that I don't understand, and I just want someone to talk to me about it.

All right, I'll work on it.

Like, I just want to know the end. It's not like, you know, No, actually people have different interpretations of the end. It's, it's like it, the, it ends and I'm just like, can I just get clarification on what that means?

Google it.

I could, but I'd rather talk to people. I'm a people person.

She's a communicator.

I don't wanna lose that human connection.

I do desperately.

I don't wanna lose that human connection.

That human what? I say that human what?

Q-nection.

Yeah.

I say please and thank you to ChatGPT. Like that's just something.

Okay. Well you're wasting batteries.

No, I actually saw a tweet that was such a slay about why it's totally fine and you should say please and thank you to your ChatGPT because it does inform how you move in this world and you just start barking orders.

Right.

And how some people, like when they have their kids talk to Alexa, they have them say please to Alexa. And even though Alexa doesn't need a please or thank you, it's like, that's how you speak to people.

Well, I think when you're asking for something, I agree with what you're saying as it regards to children. Mm-hmm. But like, I know when I'm talking to a robot versus a, a human being, I'm not gonna start yelling at a waiter versus how I did ChatGPT last night when they were helping me make salmon burgers.

No, but like, even I, I'm on this like text thread, you're on it too, where like you can text for things, you know, like where you have questions.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean?

And it's like a customer service text.

It's a customer service text thread.

Yeah.

And it's a person on the other end. However, like the way that I would write to it is the same way I'd write to chat. Like, hi, uh, is this and this open? You know what I mean?

And they always sign it like, hi, you're all set, X Taylor from relations, you know?

Yeah. And like the If I start like talking nasty to chat, then that's how I would talk in other customer service. Like I think it's a full 360 picture of manners.

I forget who said it, but honestly I think about this person. Somebody made a joke once. I really would love to know who it is to properly credit it, but like how they can never run for president because of that one customer service call. And you know, they like record for quality service.

That's funny.

It's, I forget it. I don't know if it was like a standup special or somebody said it to me.

Like I never heard it.

It was so funny. Funny. Ugh, I would love to properly credit. I'm sorry.

That's really funny. I've never heard that.

But yeah, like now our ChatGPT history is gonna start coming up in presidential elections.

But also regarding being polite to chat, it, it changes how chat responds to you. I saw that if you like ask chat like reasonably and sensibly and politely, like they'll get you answers from Google or whatever. If you like bark orders at them, they get you answers from Reddit.

Yikes.

Yeah. Yeah, interesting. It was a very interesting—

but you are wasting a battery, you know, every time chat has to like— no, but some answer, it burns the energy of a lithium battery, right?

But compared to how much they burn in total, how much money is spent on chat, like your please and your thank you is nothing. Don't worry about it.

Don't you feel like there was a big period of your life where like you didn't use batteries? Like, I feel like batteries sort of like came back Well, no, no, I feel like they were sort of going extinct until I had a baby. Now, oh my God, I'm always changing batteries on stuff. But like before that, the remotes don't have batteries anymore. Like besides kids' toys, what uses batteries?

So my frother, I use a battery-operated, uh, milk frother. Milk fro— what's it called? Um, yeah, like whisker.

Yeah.

Because it's way more powerful. I tried the ones that charge, they stink.

Yeah.

They don't hold a charge and then they stop working and they use like the cheap USB-Cs. So Lauren Elizabeth was like, you have to get a battery-operated one.

Mm-hmm.

And I did. And since Lauren Elizabeth was on the toast in June.

Mm-hmm.

I have not had to change the battery. Just saying.

We kind of gotta go, go back to the OG batteries.

Yeah.

Like I feel that way about my stroller fan. One of my like full-time jobs is making sure the stroller fan is always charged, especially while we're in Florida and the Hamptons too. It was like over the summer, such a big deal. Um, and I keep—

you just had extra batteries.

I couldn't help but thinking like these should be battery operated.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Keep extra batteries in the stroller.

Yeah.

And now people use like the cell batteries. What are those called?

They look like quarters.

Yeah, and they're very dangerous.

Are they?

For kids if they swallow them. Oh, it's like a problem. But a lot of them have this cell. What's it called?

Button battery?

It doesn't feel right either. It's like cell.

Okay, it's a button battery, or it's a button battery. I mean, I guess it looks like a button, so that feels right.

Cell.

What is cell?

What's it? A coin cell battery.

Oh, a coin. Yeah, a quarter.

Okay, so we're saying the same thing.

Quarter.

I'm happy. Maybe it's just like different brands, you know? It's like the Duracell versus the Energizer Bunny or the Buracell, you know?

Energizer.

That's all Duracell. Are there other batteries?

Energizer. Oh right, am I speaking fucking English?

You said Energizer Bunny.

Yeah, because I was like, what's the company? Energizer.

Interesting.

They sort of gave up, don't you find?

They've not made that connection strong enough in the zeitgeist.

Don't you feel like they've sort of given up? There was like, during my childhood, Duracell is the Coca-Cola, right? And they were really doing the most with their commercials just to sort of be like, there are other options for batteries. And I feel like they kind of gave up.

Yeah, I think they're just like, we're here, take it or leave it. If you need a battery, you can call us. If we're sold out of Duracell, but we're not going to like try and convince you that you need batteries, cuz like you'll know when you need one.

And I'm I wouldn't say like I think consciously about what types of batteries, but I've never bought anything other than Duracell.

But you know, like Amazon makes batteries now. Like if you go to Amazon, buy batteries.

I'm sorry, I do have a big box of Amazon Basics in my home in New York.

So like that's the new battery.

Yeah. Cuz like whatever comes up first.

Yeah.

That's the new battery.

Whatever comes up first, bestie.

Okay. Slid that in. Okay. She's crazy. Like, like I said, it's a bombshell episode. Did I lie?

It's a bombshell episode, bestie.

It's a bombshell episode, bestie. Everyone loves us.

Oh my God, shall we get into this bombshell of an episode? Okay, you guys.

Okay, bestie.

Okay, bestie. Say less. Without further ado, it is time for the Fast Five stories that you need to know.

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Our first story— Claudia dropped her iPad in a bombshell move.

What did I say? Did I lie at the beginning of this episode?

Our first story: Doja Cat is taking back Timothée Chalamet criticism and says, I've never been to a ballet or opera. My outrage was virtue signaling, a way to garner clicks, likes, and approval.

Slay the house down, Boots. I think it's actually amazing when someone's able to acknowledge this. However, I do— like, anyone who was susceptible enough to like hop on the Timothée Chalamet bandwagon of hate, like, is a loser. So while I really respect this, anybody who's like making videos like, here's what I think about Timothée Chalamet— we don't give a fuck. Like, nobody asked.

I saw a video yesterday that like really, um, radicalized me. Oh, to be pro-Timothée. Okay, the one—

yeah, I do.

Um, and like I said yesterday when we closed out the segment, like, I don't really care, like, about what Timothée said. Yeah. Didn't say, I'm not mad, I'm not supporting it. Like, I just don't care. After seeing some of these dumb bitches try and, like, make themselves seem important by discussing the matter, I feel the need to defend Timothée, um, because I just can't be on the other side now.

Yeah, it's actually crazy how everybody's being like, here are my thoughts on the Timothée situation. Here are my thoughts. Who are you?

No, seriously. And it's not anyone that like would have any—

the only person allowed to speak is Missy Copeland.

And she did. And maybe like, you know what, she's allowed to be mad. Maria Callas.

Is she alive? Posthumously, yes. Maria Callas. Uh, like again, you— in order—

maybe also Jenny Lind could have an opinion.

The real life— here are the people who are eligible to be mad or even just like make a statement on, um, Mikhail, uh, Gorbachev. Okay, Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall.

Alexander Petrovsky.

Yeah, the actor who plays it, because he was in the ballet. Petrovsky. He's like a famous ballerina. Misty Copeland. And anybody who can seriously name 3 operas or 3 ballets.

And I— not including The Nutcracker, unfortunately.

No, fine. No, Jackie. And I just want to say, including The Nutcracker, you can use that as your first one.

And I want to say, like, I went to the ballet this year, last year.

She supports— she's what they call a patron.

I went to actually 2 ballets last year, so you actually can't tell me nothing.

Okay, so you went to The Nutcracker and then—

and then The Nutcracker twice. Okay. Yeah, so I've seen The Nutcracker twice.

Oh, sorry, I went also. Were you there in Palm Beach?

Oh yeah, last year.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And we're not mad, so yeah.

Um, anyways, Doja Cat, I actually think like Doja Cat— I don't know if she's saying all of this in earnest. I feel like she was sort of conducting a social experiment on herself.

Yes, it feels like the Stanford Prison Experiment.

Like, so she's walking back her criticism of Timothy amid the continued outrage over him dissing opera and ballet, if that's what you want to call it. Um, she said originally she chided him in a since-deleted TikTok post, telling him that people give a fuck about opera and ballet. She explained, hey, by the way, opera is 400 years old, ballet is 500 years old. Somebody named Timothée Chalamet had the nerve— big guy, by the way— had the nerve to say on camera that nobody cares about it. You show up in a nice outfit, you sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up. That's the usual etiquette around those things. Maybe learn something from that. Okay, now she said that she knows nothing about opera or ballet. She's never even been to see the theater in, uh, either art form live in person. She admitted that she merely jumped on the outrage bandwagon in her original video. She said, quote, I've never been to a ballet, I've never seen an opera, and I took it upon myself yesterday to kind of give it to the man because there is a culture based around outrage and things like that, and people wanna feel like they're part of something.

It's a need to connect, whether good or bad. What I was doing yesterday was virtue signaling because I wanted to connect, and I knew that Timothy's goof-up was something that I could leverage in order for people to connect with me and fuck with me. And it's easy. It's a modern way to garner clicks, likes of people. Wow. And all kinds of things like that from people. And so I did that yesterday, and I didn't really think about why I was doing it. I don't know anything about opera. I don't know anything about ballet, and I've never been to either shows, and I think I just wanted a hug. I think that's all that I wanted.

This is kind of manic, but also a slay. I wanted a hug.

I wanted to feel like I was a part of something bigger than myself. I wanted to be pat on the back the way everyone, everybody else is patting each other on the back in the comment sections. And I wanted to look like a hero. And that's what happened. And when I got it, I didn't like it so much.

Mm-hmm.

It just kind of furthers the fact that sometimes I think shit and then I'm like, nevermind. Mm-hmm. So nevermind.

I mean, This is really bordering between like prolific and manic.

This is— no, I'm sorry. This is kind of prolific. It encapsulates so many different things that happen every day on the internet of people just like hopping on bandwagons, feeling rage for things that have nothing to do with them, that they don't even care about, that they don't even know about.

So manufactured.

And just really needing a hug.

Yeah.

Needing to feel like a part of something.

You know, and it's not even that needing a hug. The part that I found to be so brilliant was like, using the outrage like you actually don't even really feel strongly about in order to like garner likeness for yourself. Like there's community in being a hater.

Yeah.

And like you benefit from being an out— like, I'm sorry, this whole Timothée Chalamet thing is the biggest L for Jamie Lee Curtis. She's like one of the most famous people talking out, speaking out, and it's like, shut up.

Well, she like loves speaking out.

She does. She's a speaker.

She loves like getting in the ring on things that don't have to do with her. And that's like— and now it has to do with her because now anytime something happens, it's like, well, what does Jamie Lee Curtis think? Like, because she sort of put that self in her— that position as like a cultural commentator. Okay, I— it's not for me, but okay.

Yeah.

Um, and so I, I honestly, I love this from Doja Cat. Like, I really love it.

A rare slay for one Mrs. Cat.

I don't know, I feel like she slays here and there. She's confusing. Like, yeah, but it's very— yeah, there's no—

like, a lot of her her internet behavior and just like career is like trolly. So like I never know when she's being serious.

Yeah. And I wonder if she said something about Timothée just so that she could then say this. Like I wouldn't be surprised if— it's not like she actually went on this journey, she was just trying to show you guys like this is what we're all doing. Not we, sorry, I don't do it. I actually feel like whatever this is, I do the opposite of. Like I—

you say the opposite just so somebody says it. That's how I feel. Something. Yeah.

Yeah. No, like I wanna be a part of—

no, I actually do. I actually do feel like we're so against this type of internet behavior that it does cloud our takes on stuff because we more often than not don't like to go with the herd. And I actually feel like in time, like in the moment, people are always like, you have the worst takes, whatever. But like years later, I actually always feel good about that. You know how I kind of feel like that now? I feel like people are really changing their tune on Sofia Franklin. And like at the time, I remember when we were discussing it, we were like, well, Sofia's not greedy for wanting more money. And like, you know, she does know the value of the podcast. And really everybody was like, Sofia's greedy, she's a slut, or whatever. Like, and now everyone's like, we did wrong for Sofia.

We?

Not me. Like, I feel like we reported on that really fairly and didn't jump on the bandwagon, only because honestly, like, she was getting it so bad. Like, I wasn't gonna give it—

you know, I think our bias came from not wanting, like, a podcast duo to break up. Like, because I think we always were like, well, can they figure it out? Um, I feel like we saw ourselves in them and that just like hurts, you know?

Yeah.

Same with Grace and Brianna.

And nobody wants to hear it, but same with Blake Lively.

I think time will be on your side. Yeah.

Like when the documentary comes out, it's like, you know, when the Britney one, like it's like the media was so bad. It's like we're the media now. Everyone on the internet like creates public opinion. And so when the documentaries came out, be like, the world was so bad to her. The world, it was you, not me.

And like back in the day it was, it was, you know, talking heads, people on shows and stuff. Now it's the comments section. And it's also like the people with the green screen videos. And drama channels. Yeah. And maybe like eventually I'll be— have the wrong take because I just don't want to be on the side of the outrage. Um, but yeah, that's my gut feeling is I don't want to be on the side of the outrage, especially when I'm personally like not outraged. It does not have value in opera. I don't have to do it.

When like a former pop star, like, like the Britney, Christina, when all those like documentaries or books come out, like the, the takeaway for a lot of people is like, oh, the world was so cruel and the media. And we have like people to blame, right? People are like, people love to blame Diane Sawyer, you know, like for her crazy questions. But now, like, Barbara Walters— the media has— thank you, not Diane Sawyer, Barbara Walters. The media has sort of been democratized where like every— like the opinions of people come from just like voices of randos, comment sections, random tweets that go viral. So I think what Doja Cat has very poignantly pointed out is that like those, like, outrage just been like— it just furthers that system.

It's just the new system.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, it didn't go away, it just changed.

Exactly. So like, in years we're gonna be like—

I can't—

I really feel like people are gonna be like that with like Lively being like, the world was so evil. And it's like, well, I tried to tell you guys.

Uh, I don't know, I'm, I'm too confused on that one. Yeah, I'm not gonna call it. Okay, either way, I'm just throwing my hands up.

Um, not my plate.

Yeah. Are you ready for our next story? Some major news in the entertainment space. Travis Kelce is officially the new brand ambassador for Six Flags.

Oh, did we report this?

Well, he was like doing something with Six Flags, and now it's that he will serve as Six Flags' brand ambassador and marketing partner.

They also went out of business.

Uh, bankrupt.

We reported that. Yeah, we did.

Well, now they obviously have a big plan, uh-huh, to come back, and it's Travis Kelce.

Well, that's good.

What about that, that old guy that dances in the commercials?

I mean, that was like literally when we were kids. He has since passed.

He has?

Yeah, I remember when he did.

Travis will be doing that, or his dad, or he'll be dancing in commercials, you know?

Yeah, no, Travis is like very family friendly, like, and it's funny because I think like as a person he's not, but his brand for some reason, like, hey, sports is— because sports is very like, you know, kids, and you know, he's gen— he's like one of the General Mills cereal guys. Like, it's— he does like a lot of kids stuff, so it's kind of perfect. Even though I think as a person he's probably like quite vulgar, you know? Yeah, but I love Slay.

Yeah, um, cute, very cute. When's the last time you've been to Six Flags?

Fun fact about me, I've never been to a Six Flags. I don't like roller coasters.

There's somewhere in the Northeast similar to Six Flags, but it's not called Six Flags.

I've been to like plenty of amusement parks, water parks, like Splash Splash, you know, like amusement parks. Yeah. Um, where do we used to go at camp?

Fun Camelback?

No, no, no. Fun Splash— I've been to Splash Town, so much fun. But no, in Maine, what was—

Camel— no, in Maine, Splash Town.

No, Fun Town. Yeah, yeah. Those were some of the best memories of my life.

Oh my God, I dreaded those days.

Classic you.

I Dreaded.

When I die and like what I envision heaven, it was literally Funtown Splashdown. Oh my God, I wonder if it's as like beautiful as I remember.

I remember it being like the most— like, I know amusement parks can be gross, but like Funtown was like the premium one. Yeah, it was like fancy.

Was it?

Definitely not. No.

Okay. It was like probably the most fun I've ever had. Like the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. Ugh.

I always wound up having fun on those days, but I just dreaded it. It's a new— I hate the field trip. I remember when I was a freshman in high school at my first high school that I went to, cuz I, I transferred high schools in the middle of high school, which yeah, is as hard as it sounds. Mm-hmm. Um, we won our school, uh, color war. Like you got a trip every grade, like, and it's kind of amazing. The freshmen beat the seniors, right?

Huge.

So we got a trip to Six Flags and I remember my allergies were so bad that day.

And you're such a diva. I guess.

Cause it was like at the beginning of spring, like seriously, pollen in the air. And I'd never been on an upside down roller coaster.

Yeah, me neither.

And like my friends convinced me to go on one. So like I waited on the line and by the time we got to the end of the line, I was like, I really don't wanna go, but like I just waited on the line. Yeah. Like I have to go. Yeah. I can't have just wasted my time. So I did it. I went on an upside down roller coaster and it was such a thrill. Really? Yeah. I then I rode like a couple more. Did you throw up? No, I had a great day. Oh. And, and then by the end I was like, I've had my fill. I never need to do this again.

Yeah. I have been on like a couple of roller coasters.

Upside down?

No.

That's like, that's when you leveled up.

I'm sorry. I think that's so unnecessary. Like, in this life, what are we doing? And anytime I've gone on a roller coaster, like, right when I'm like at the apex, I'm like, why the fuck did I do this? And like, I don't even like it afterwards. Like, I'm sorry, no.

It was called Spider-Man. That was the one I went on. Anyone been there? At Six Flags.

What's the Funtown Splashdown? Like, the big one? It starts with a— yeah, it was made of wood, and I do feel like it's probably like condemned now. I need to look up pictures of Funtown Splashdown just to remember.

And it had like a little town, right? It felt like you were in Beauty and the Beast.

Kind of like how Disney has like Main Street.

Yeah.

Funtown Splashdown. So it is still open for business.

I wasn't big on the splashdown.

Oh no, temporarily closed. That's really upsetting.

Yeah.

Creates memories that will last a lifetime. Apparently not since—

well, you could go to Six Flags now.

No, Funtown Splashdown like is—

well, I guess now the adult version of going to the, the parent version of going to Six Flags is like going to Disney with your kids at this age.

Excalibur, not Excelsior.

I'm sorry.

And yet it was literally made of wood. That does not look safe.

You look like a piece of wood.

You look like a piece of wood.

But it was like the biggest wooden roller coaster in the country.

So it's actually insane that we were going on a wooden roller coaster.

Yeah, you had to do it. You just had—

you had to.

With a little funnel cake to top off the day. Works for me. Anyways, Travis is gonna be experiencing all these memories and more as the new ambassador of Six Flags. I can't wait to see Taylor there. And I'm sorry if he doesn't bring Taylor to Six Flags. Agreed. He's not like, he's not serious about the brand.

I hope they bring back their commercials. That was like a core part of our childhood was all the commercials and they were kind of very culturally iconic and relevant.

Yeah. Let's see what's in store. I like this.

And I think we should bring back theme parks. I don't think they ever went out of style, but like kids are just like always on their phones and like, you know what, why don't you leave your phone at home and go to the theme park for the day? Eat, get sick from eating. And yeah, like that's That's good old-fashioned fun.

It's true.

Good for the mental health. I know kids are all obsessed with mental health these days. Go to the theme park, it'll fix everything.

It's true. Are you ready for our—

I sound like one of those like toxic adults. Oh, you're anxious? Just calm down.

Like, yeah, don't worry.

Oh, you're fine.

Don't worry about it. Drink some water.

How about this? Don't worry about it. Don't worry about a thing.

You ready for our third story? Mhm. Livi Dunn is joining the Baywatch reboot. She's beginning a new acting career, and it will begin with a role in the Baywatch reboot, which is a great way to begin an acting career for Livvy Dunn.

Yes, unfortunately, I feel— and this is absolutely zero shade to Livvy Dunn, I think she's great, and like, I love this for her, um, but I already had like a lot of suspicions about this sort of cursed franchise, and I do feel like they're doing a little bit too much, and like, I'm more sure than ever that the show is going to be bad. Sorry.

Is that a set that you're wearing?

It is.

It's very cute.

Thank you so much.

Little cable knit.

Yeah, shorts. I would get a sweater set, but, um, no, no, you don't need to. Yeah, so I'm wearing—

it's from Alo.

It's a cable knit. It's actually cashmere. Like, Alo doesn't make athleisure anymore. They like switched to making high fashion. You see, they make like leather purses now. Oh yeah, it's weird. It's like not a store for like leggings anymore. Um, it has matching shorts.

Yeah, it's so cute.

Thanks so much. I'll be sure to link it on my ShopMy—

yeah, for sure. Yeah, I'll take one.

Yeah.

Anyways, back to Olivia Gunn. You know what? I'm really into not just like the Baywatch reboot, like whatever the show's gonna be, I'm loving the news. You know what I mean?

Yeah, of course, we're more excited about the releases.

Yeah, who else is gonna be in it? Also, I need to say, Hassie Harrison is in Yellowstone. Did you see our comments where it blazed?

Yes, I saw like one comment. And I know who she is now.

Who she had with the guy.

Ryan, yeah.

I know who she is now too. I'm surprised we didn't recognize her.

She's whatever. What did they used to call the bunny?

Bunny hoppers.

Yeah, she was like a bunny hopper who found love in the Yellowstone barn.

She's a hop little bunny hop hop hop.

And then they're married in real life.

Bunny barn bunny.

Okay.

Bunny babe.

Okay.

What's the word?

I thought we decided it was a bunny hopper. No. It's a bunny hopper now.

Okay. But you guys know.

Yeah, you know what we're talking about.

I'm so really excited. What?

Bubble Bunny. Oh, Buckle. Yeah, Buckle Bunny.

Because you just like undo the buckles.

I don't know, you just like do stuff of the rodeo. Yeah, like you only date cowboys like for fun.

Yeah, but you also are in the rodeo yourself.

Yeah, like you're like a groupie. It's a groupie for the rodeo.

Okay, love it.

Yeah.

Um, so Libby Dunn would be in Baywatch.

Amazing.

Great.

More.

I love the stories about Baywatch casting. Great job.

Is it your new Annie Live?

It's the new Annie Live. It's sexy Annie Live.

Yucky!

It's the sexy version of Annie Live.

It's Annie grown up. It's Annie after dark.

You guys, if you were not there for Annie Live—

and by we mean there, by there we mean here.

Here at the Toast for the year leading up to Annie Live. Like, you missed out on the experience.

I was actually on tour when Annie Live was playing, and I was live. Yeah, when, when they were actually broadcasting the live performance, I was on stage. Like, we were talking about it the whole time. I was like, what's going on on Annie Live? It was like the Super Bowl.

Oh my God, seriously, take me back.

Yeah, right. That was the last time I was truly happy. Take me back. That was so funny. We just like couldn't stop reporting on like all the updates. Like you would've thought we had a gun to our head. You would've thought we were the castings, the drama, the relationships, like everything. We were the leading source, the leading news network on all things Annie Live. And I don't know why. And then we did watch it. Of course I had to watch it late cuz I was on stage when it was being broadcast and it was live. It was amazing.

I loved it.

The dog was amazing.

What about 3 bucks, 2 bags, 1 me?

3 bucks. 2 bags, 1 me. That was good harmony.

Yeah, you guys, oh my gosh, we need more lives.

Like, yes, I miss that era so much. Grease live, Rent live.

It's so bad, it never goes well. Everybody hates it.

Except everybody loved The Wiz. That was like the one that wasn't bad.

Thankless. Yeah, you will get nothing and you probably won't get another role.

Vanessa Hudgens literally like performed it the night her father died. Like, it was so high stakes.

It was, I think, uh, what was the other live I was just thinking of?

There's Hairspray. Oh, Hairspray. Ariana was Penny Pingleton.

Like, you had to be there, and it was so bad that I actually don't think there's like a, a version you can watch now, like, unless you DVR'd it.

Peter Pan Live starring Allison Williams.

I think that ruined her career.

Definitely didn't help.

It's a career— and the girl who played Tracy Turnblad for Hairspray Live, never saw her again.

Well, the thing is about the role of Tracy Turnblad, it's always like after the original role of Ricky Lake, whose career it made. It is a cursed role. That's why I actually don't ever want to play.

They always cast an unknown, so it's like, this might be the only role you get.

Yeah. Um, and it's not a particularly flattering role. Like, Tracy's sort of like the butt of the show, you know?

But you get to show off your chops.

Yeah. So it's actually insane how good Nikki Blonsky was. Like, I know it's like a joke, hey, it's Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray, and she's like a toothless wonder now, but like, it's actually insane. She was operating at a level unbeknownst to the culture.

Like, I think it took everything from her.

You know, it left nothing. Yeah, like it is the best singing, acting, dancing, just like overall performing I've ever seen. Yeah, that's what's so crazy about it.

Yeah, so please bring back lives.

Yes, that was so— and you know, I long to be a part of something and watch everyone watching something live. The live element, you had to watch it live because it was so high stakes.

And some of them went off without a hitch, like no one's career was ruined, like Carrie Underwood in The Sound of Music.

Oh yeah, that one was sort of like I don't think a lot of people watched it. Like, it wasn't newsmaking.

Yeah, but it went off okay.

So it was an NBC thing, right? They should do Wicked live.

Yeah.

Oh my God, I love that.

They should do The Greatest Showman live.

They should. We have ideas. Hire us. We'll be like that. We'll be consultants for the project, and then we'll report on every single cast. Built-in promo.

It's amazing.

Yeah, it's a win-win.

Are you ready for our fourth story, which is going to lead into our Beverly Hills recap? Yes, because This was so funny last night. The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars attended an opera.

You're kidding. Oh, on the show? Oh, I didn't watch.

Wait, you didn't watch?

No, I asked you last night, are we watching Salamo or Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? You said Beverly Hills and I said, okay, I'm watching Salamo.

Oh, I figured that meant that you were just watching both.

No, and the last couple of episodes were like sort of meh.

Well, now they're in Italy.

Okay.

Oh my gosh.

And they went to an opera.

Well, the villa has its own theater.

Yes, it does.

And not just a movie theater, a stage. And they put on an opera, which was just so funny considering opera's so in zeitgeist. And we see Sutton. It sounded like an amazing— Yeah, I thought it was hysterical. Amanda Francis is on her phone. Sutton was—

That's so rude.

Sutton said that she falls asleep at the opera, and she's a fancy lady, so she's just not for the opera, which is fine.

I also wanna say, I feel like opera—

Oh, and Boze is saying, she's like, "I love the opera. I'm actually on the board of the LA Opera brand board." Yeah. And I was like, it literally felt like this episode was put together in the last week in response to Timothee.

That's so funny.

And Kyle's like, filming. We're seeing everyone, how they engage with the opera.

What about Kathy Hilton?

Kathy Hilton, you know, she sat.

Yeah.

Erika loves.

Yeah.

Jennifer Tilly's mother was an opera singer, so she said she loves the opera.

I believe that.

We literally got every single woman's thoughts on the opera before Tim—

like, unbridled thoughts.

I genuinely think they had to have edited the episode this week. It was so brilliant. Then Jennifer Tilly comes out singing. She sings like an opera singer. She used to, like, sit at the piano with her mother and sing opera. Like, everyone has has a connection to opera, positive or negative.

Um, do we have a connection to opera aside from the fact that like I could have been an opera singer in another life?

No. Maybe we should go to the opera.

I just feel like opera singers, female opera singers, like are busty by nature. I don't know if it's something about like the breathing or the corset. Um, and I do feel like if I was born in another era, like I would've sort of had to have become, just due to my voice and my breasts, like an opera singer.

We should see an opera.

Okay. Actually, with all this opera chatter, I did see a DM. I didn't open it from the Metropolitan Opera in the city asking if we wanted to come.

Well, if there's—

I meant to respond to it, but I forgot.

South Floridian Opera that would like to have—

no, I'll be back in New York soon.

So you'd like to have me? I would like to.

Do we have to wear a gown, or like, can you wear leggings to the opera? You like—

I can't. I don't think you can. I think that's what's great. Like, even when we went to The Nutcracker, everyone dressed up. I wore a Hill House. Yeah, amazing. And everyone else was so dressed to the nines.

Maybe I'll put on like trousers.

Yeah, like, that is— we need to bring back that.

Agreed.

And we also need to thank Timothée.

It's true.

I also saw a theory that that whoever unearthed this clip from the interview that was like 2 weeks ago that came and went. And it was such a long interview where like a lot more buzzy moments happened, that it's one of his ops for Best Actor that sort of dug this up and disseminated it to cancel Timothée.

I'm sorry, if this is the thing, like, does, does this sort of impact Oscar voting? Oscar voting's over, right?

Look at Carla Sofia.

Yeah, I guess, but like, I could— was— did Carla Sofia sweep every award before the Oscars. Like, Timothée has won every single award except for the SAG Award and BAFTAs.

He didn't win—

yes, I thought he won everything.

No, he— the last couple he lost. He won the Golden Globes to win. But if he had like a major scandal right now—

but it's not a major scandal.

No, but if he had like a major scandal right now, I do not think that the Oscars would have him win, right?

Like if somebody like, like came out and like accused him of something, it was like really terrible.

So I guess like he must be a perfect person if this is the worst thing that they could find on him.

Yeah.

Um, but I just thought that was an interesting theory. Yeah, that someone's trying to cancel him so they could win the Oscar. I mean, giving like Nancy Kerrigan a bat to the knees, you know, like he's Nancy.

Yeah, this is so Tonya.

And there's a Tonya out there that we need to find. I, Tonya.

I, Tonya.

Yeah, that was a crazy movie. Yeah, I saw that one.

It was good.

It was.

Why do you think it was crazy? It was a crazy story.

It was just like crazy that we need like Tonya Harding like, yeah, no, it was kind of like put a hit out on Nancy Kerrigan's leg so that she couldn't win.

It was like trying to garner sympathy for Tonya, being like, oh well, she's poor. Okay, like, so poor people don't bash in other people's knees? Like, her being poor, it was all about how like she had to grow up skating, practicing at the mall for the free, and like Nancy had a private coach, so she deserved her knee bash. Like, yeah, that was kind of like a big flop.

And that's the classic Hollywood, they want you to see the other side, the other side, yeah, the evil person.

I'm good.

It's just like not my favorite.

That's kind of how I felt about the Aaron Hernandez documentary. It was like, well, he's gay and he couldn't tell anyone, so that's why he killed his friend. And I'm like, okay, I feel like there are other ways to, yeah, come out. Um, and I actually feel like the gay community was like, please exclude us from this narrative. Like, it was just kind of blaming the fact that he was like closeted and football is like toxic for gay people. Um, and that's why he had to kill his friend. I didn't like that documentary in terms of that, but I learned a lot.

Yeah, that's one of my least favorite tropes. Oh, also, I was thinking of you on Beverly Hills last night because Erica referenced your favorite documentary?

Three Identical Strangers?

No, that's my favorite.

What is my favorite Joan Rivers piece of work? No, wait, let me think.

True, think, um, Blackfish.

No, I have a lot of favorite documentaries.

Think like cult, cult, because they're talking about Amanda being in a cult.

What's my favorite cult documentary? Um, Eat, Sweet, Pray, and Obey, whatever that one's called.

Mother God. Oh my God, The Silver Woman.

I literally blocked out that documentary. That was like turned and I watched You Pregnant. I was obviously like scraping the bottom of the barrel cuz when I was pregnant I watched everything, so I had like nothing left to watch. And somebody, Remy Vader, was like posting on her stories about this HBO Max Mother Earth. What did Erica say?

Oh my God, well she was saying how Amanda Francis was talking about being in a cult, and I don't know what the women were trying to say in their confessionals, but just sort of that like her story sort of ends, she ran away in the night and that's that on that. And then she just had to like threaten the pastor to get him deordained and they stopped bothering her. And then Erica was like, you know, when you think of cult, you think of Charles Manson. Yeah, I saw Mother God, the woman turned silver and they're carrying around her dead body.

Oh my God, Erica's so fucking real for that.

So funny in her confessionals.

Oh, I wish I watched this episode because also, but you know, Ben's obsessed with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, so I have to watch every episode with him. And he watched that documentary with me and he actually did not forgive me for like 4 days for making him watch it.

Well, now it all— all your hard work pays off because you'll have a nice laugh.

The Silver Woman. Yes. And they did. They like kept her body alive in a hotel room, and then the hotel was like, we're a little suspicious, like, can you— can we come in? And they were like, no, you can't come in. So they smuggled her body out in a tarp and buried her out in the woods. And they were waiting because like, obviously the point of the cult was that when Mother Earth died, we give her back to the earth, and then like basically like the Messiah comes or whatever. And they like left— like, she died they gave her back to the earth and nothing happened. And we just had to like— it was just like awkward. Like, it was just like— it was very disappointing for those people.

Yeah. So I don't know if they were trying to say like Amanda— I don't know what they were trying to say, but they just said her cult story is like not that crazy.

Yeah. And I think maybe, um, they were expecting like just something crazier. She might have just sort of been a part of like a deeply religious zealot community.

Yeah.

And like made the choice to leave, which I'm sure was really hard, but it's not necessarily like a cult.

Yeah, yeah. I, I guess like a cult is like, you know, an open-ended term and people use it like very, um, generously sometimes. Yeah. You know, they call the show a cult.

They do call the show a cult and we are. Be sure to head over to patreon.com to buy your membership into our cult.

Um, also, so they're in Italy. The villa is so, so gorgeous. It's so gorgeous. And you know, I don't have like wanderlust at all. Yeah. But it was like actually making me wanna go to Italy. They were eating olive oil right off the olive tree, like right over there. And like, wow, I wanna taste that. Now, are there any olive trees in the US?

Like, I'm sure there are, but I'm sure they're disgusting.

Why would they be disgusting if it's an olive tree?

Like, it's not the same.

I'm down to clown.

It's not the same. Uh, if you're asking me to go to Italy, I will go with you.

Like, it looked so amazing. Rachel and Dorit are just like my faves. Yeah. Right now Rachel was sharing how, so she's gone. Roger's with the one son. The other son is at his best friend's house. The younger son is with Roger and he like sat him down and told him that he has a girlfriend. Friend, like, while she's gone. And then the son, like, calls Rachel, but she's sleeping because of the time difference. And then when she finally sees this thing, then he's sleeping. She hasn't, like— she's, like, gonna jump out of her skin.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Her and Dorit are flipping. Yeah, that this happened. I just, like, I felt so, so bad.

Roger's, like, not a good guy. Yeah, it's actually insane how, like, crazy people become when they get divorced. That's sort of the theme of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It's like these men having midlife crises, and they're all very wealthy men, so they do then go on to, like, date young hot things. And it's not because they're interesting or good-looking, it's because that they're wealthy. And it just like is a real— you know how, uh, did you ever see that Adam Driver Scarlett Johansson movie where like a marriage story where they walk you through a divorce?

No, I didn't see it, but I—

well, people say it's like it was so well received because it was very relatable how like when you decide to divorce someone, you become— they become, and I'm sure you to them, a completely different person, an actual enemy. Um, and it was very hyper-realistic, like you almost wish that person was dead. Like, you hate them so much. And I feel like Real Housewives of Beverly Hills recently has become like a marriage story. Like, you're watching these men, and again, we're only seeing it from the women's perspective, but I believe it, you know.

But I just like the blatant— like, go divorce and like move on with your life and have a girlfriend, whatever, but like protect your kids as much as you possibly can. Insulate them from everything as much as you can. Yeah, like don't bring the girlfriend for camp drop-off. They're about to go away for a month. And you're about to drop this on them.

Yeah.

Why?

No, that's bad guy.

Why?

That's bad guy.

You can have your summer with your girlfriend. Just wait 5 more minutes and leave her in the car.

Yeah.

So, um, okay. I guess we'll recap it whenever.

Yes.

Whenever you watch.

Um, before we go on, let me let you know that the remainder of today's show is brought to you by Gold Bond and their fabulous line of scented hand creams that I actually have here. Gimme, gimme. Yes. We have all 4 scents.

I'm in a citrus mood. This is Citrus Pop. It has vitamin C and green tea.

Tea. So let's use this opportunity to check in on our fellow swirlies. Take a look down at your hands. How do they look? You know, the winter season, the constant hand washing— hopefully, um, your hands can become dry, sad, begging for hydration. And one of those things, like, when we think about, like, we take care of our skin, we take care of, like, our— or we're trying to drink a lot of water, we have a lot of hair care— I feel like our hands sometimes do get forgotten about. And I really like Gold Bond's line of hand creams because, first of all, they come in 4 delicious scents. I've got Vanilla Dream. What I use almost most frequently is Cedar Rain.

I'm a Cedar Rain sort of girl.

You know, green is like kind of my color.

Yeah.

Fun fact about me. Floral Bloom, and then Jackie has the Citrus.

I'm a citrus girl.

So each cream is formulated with skin-loving ingredients to keep your hands looking and feeling their best. They come in 4 amazing scents which make moisturizing feel less like a chore and more like a tiny luxury moment. So it's, they're really the perfect size. I would say it's smaller than the phone. So perfect for on-the-go hydration. Keep one in your bag, one in your desk, in the car. They're also perfect for gifting, a little desk drawer restock. If you have a coworker who you just want to like send some love to, give them a hand cream. I feel like people who work in offices always need hand cream. The air conditioning can be very drying.

And if you have a desk, like, you need to be keeping a hand cream in there.

So Vanilla Dream is very softening. It's made with shea butter to boost moisture and cocoa butter to help smooth and soften your hands. It's a very cozy esthetic. I'm very candlelit evening energy. And then there's Floral Bloom, which is the pink one that I have right here. It's lightweight, it's hydrating with jojoba, niacinamide to help restore your skin's moisture barrier. So that's— this one feels very fresh and soft. Um, and then Citrus Pop, which is what Jackie has, it is for people who want to glow. It has vitamin C. I love to glow, which helps visibly brighten and even your tone, plus green tea to help protect your skin from environmental stressors. It's very, um, it's good for like a morning pick-me-up. And then Cedar Rain, which is what I use, is refreshing and soothing with aloe to invigorate and vitamin E to help soothe your skin. It feels very spa-adjacent, so it's very chic, it's very calming. What we love is that no matter which one you grab, you're getting hydration that actually lasts costs plus targeted skin benefits. So it's such an easy way to take care of your hands throughout the day without even thinking about it.

So we put it on while we're answering emails, sitting in traffic, while we're podcasting— just little moments of self-care that really add up. So if your hands are feeling dry and crusty, or you just want a cute, effective hand cream that actually does something, this is your sign to pick up the Gold Bond ones. Um, they fit perfectly in your purse. So you can shop all the Gold Bond scented hand creams now on Amazon. As always, use as directed. All 4 scents are available on Amazon. Highly recommend.

Also, they're free from parabens, phthalates, and dyes.

Love, love, love.

If that's important to you, which it is to me.

Mm, the Cedar Rain. Yeah, I guess like it being, I guess that's why I like it. You know, I love a massage and this feels like what they would use in a spa.

And like a mini massage. You can't have a massage all the time.

Skincare tip, when you take a little too much, which I just did, elbows. Don't forget the weenus.

Oh, I always do my elbows 'cause they're really dry and my self-tanner gets stuck there if I don't moisturize.

Harjee, well, thank you, Gold Bond, for sponsoring today's episode.

Thank you so much. I love the hand cream break. I always love it.

Yeah, it's kind of nice built in.

Yeah.

And today, like I said, bombshell episode. We need to be hydrated.

Our fifth and final story, Slammu recap and news. Couple things, couple things.

They dropped all 10 episodes. I've only watched one. I'm gonna watch a bunch over the weekend.

I've watched 20 minutes, but the stage is set. Mormon Wives star Michaela Matthews splits from her husband Jace Terry amid their intimacy issues.

So I'm sure this season will show us more of the devolution of their marriage, which is just crazy because if you had told me you're like, once they drop the new season, we're gonna find out a couple get divorced, I'm like, well, it's obviously Jesse and Jordan. And I'm so champion— like, I know they have young kids and I do people should, um, like work as hard as they can at that stage to stay together. I do feel like they work hard. I do feel like he's actually just a bad guy, and I do really want her to get away from him. Like, he really scares me. He has really sinister energy. And the first episode, he's like taken it upon himself to like make Dad Talk a thing. And I know they all started making TikToks together, I think just like for fun, like maybe to get a couple of brand deals, like to start earning money. Um, but he's like—

no, he really thinks he's doing something.

No, but not only that, his reasonings premise for it is like really like sinister.

I— we're doing it so we can show the girls on our own two feet, so we can show the girls that they don't have a monopoly on social media.

They do actually.

And go get a job. So fucking lame. You're doing it to show your wife that she's actually not that cool and anybody can do this.

Like, and I guess like his big get was that like he got his manager to like call whatever to organize a trip for all the boys to go to Vanderpump Villa, which is so loser-y because I don't need him to hate Marciano or—

but like, I'm sorry, if someone had an affair with your wife, like you don't need to go on their show.

He's like so proud that he got this, and he's like trying to convince all the guys. And a lot of the girls like don't want their husbands to go. I do think a big group of them end up going. And if I was one of them, I would like— first of all, I wouldn't encourage Jordan and his weird dad tuck, like chip. He has a chip on his shoulder.

You want to be famous so bad that you'll go to Italy to do the show with like the man that your wife was in love with because you want to be on TV, and you don't even care how—

but he wants to be on TV and like feel like he earned it outside of his wife, and he didn't. I think a lot of the guys actually— the show's really interesting because it's totally flipped, like traditional gender roles. And it's very cool to watch, like a lot of these girls slay, slay, slay, make all the money, and their husbands sort of slide into this sort of provider role. Like a lot of times when we're watching, the dads are like holding the babies. Sorry, caregiver role, like domestic. The— a lot of times we're watching scenes and the guys are the ones holding the babies, feeding them. And it's like nice to see that, how they've all like— maybe they didn't envision that for their life, but I feel like Zac Affleck, Connor, they've all like sort of slowly— I forget his name, but Macy's husband, who I really like, like they are more than happy to like play that part of being sort of like the stay-at-home dads and just like letting the wife make the money and them supporting in other ways. And Jordan like will not have it. Yeah, he will not have it.

And I think he was the only one whose wife was out-earning him before the show. No, not before social media, like, because she was the one with like the successful business.

He should be used to it.

Yeah, he like, he's not going quietly at into like the sort of caregiver role.

Yeah.

And he's being so toxic, so beta. He got hair plugs. I hate him. Yeah, I hate him. I need Jesse to get away from him now.

Did they wind up— go— well, I don't know if I feel that way because— and we'll talk about this with Michaela and Jace. So during last season, viewers watched as they discussed intimacy issues they were experiencing in their marriage while she was extremely pregnant, and they're trying to work on this.

Yeah, not the time.

Um, in season 4, it has Michaela sharing that there hasn't been a great deal of progress in working on the problem as she just had a baby and now is breastfeeding a baby, and they're still having intimacy issues.

It's like, just fuck off.

As she was newly postpartum and experiencing flare-ups of her chronic illness. Um, now they have shared that they have split, but does this mean separated? Does this mean divorce? Like, is it final?

It's not giving final. Okay, but it's giving like that they've decided to take a break.

Like Whitney and Connor and Jen and Zac have shown me that anything is possible. It's true. And that change is possible. And I, I, it makes me wanna root for these like young couples with young families to stay together.

I agree. I feel that way about literally everyone except for Jordan and, and Jesse. The thing with McKayla and Jayce is that the intimacy issues are rooted in her childhood trauma.

Mm-hmm.

Um, and because they're both so young, she hasn't fully worked through it and he does not have the emotional intelligence as a partner to to support her in that way. To be intimate with somebody who experienced childhood sexual trauma, like, you have to be a very thoughtful, um, intelligent, emotionally intelligent type of person. And I just feel like he's not willing to put in the work and be that. He just wants her to get fixed, and once she's fixed, we can go back. But it's like he doesn't realize he has to be a part of the healing. Um, so they are definitely at a little bit of a standstill.

Well, I feel like he's been, you know, patient with her, and they've been together for a long time. He is a lot older than her, so she— he should be like more— yeah, mature.

He should be. Yeah.

And also, people like sort of red flag their relationship. I think they got together when like she was—

she was underage.

Yeah, but they have 3 kids, like, okay, they're married.

Yeah.

Um, but so I just don't understand, like, why now? Like, if she's always like had this sort of guard up, like, why, why is he giving up on her now in the throes of pregnancy, postpartum, when like no one is at their best intimate, most intimate self? Yeah. Like, why can't we like put this on the shelf for the moment?

Yeah.

And then get back to like working on things? I don't know, maybe I'll watch the season, I'll be like, oh, they had to split. But I'm sorry, things will have to be really, really bad between them for me to think that they should split up when they just had a baby. When they just had a baby, they have 3 kids. They all throughout the show, they've seemed to be one of the better couples. Like, and of course, you know, what you see, we don't know, but like, they seem just like happy and sweet and loving towards each other. And if he like really loves her and she's going through something like so difficult, like, you be there for her.

Yeah, no, it's definitely a red flag if like— I'd like—

I'm really annoyed with him. Agreed. And I, I understand it's probably hard for him. He's in a hard spot. But like, not only has she been through so much— last season she was pregnant, this season she's postpartum, breastfeeding, breadwinning. Can you fuck off for a second?

I agree.

Just can you fuck all the way off for a second? And like, well, let's circle back.

Circle back next year. Yeah, you know, when I was not expecting them to be the ones, the ones.

And I remember last season when Jesse and Jordan like had their bregus and everyone was like shook, you know, shook the Montauk world. And those girls were saying like, it makes you like look at your own marriage and make sure like your home is in order. And I was like, Macy, you don't have to worry. Like, yeah, it was like, sorry, it was Macy and Michaela saying that. Like, yeah, now we're like all worried. I'm like, well, you guys are fine.

Yeah, I do really like Michaela and her husband. I'm sorry, Macy and her husband. Yeah, I think he's a good guy.

That's what you think? Jacob.

Jacob. Yes, yes.

And I think so too, but I thought like Michaela and Jace were like good. I thought we didn't have to worry.

Yeah, I think more so like I and maybe I thought that they were good, but I didn't think he was like, like an amazing good husband. And I feel like with Jacob, I actually think he's like a very, very good husband.

Yeah. And Macy's been through a lot too.

Yes. And when I hear her story, I'm like, oh, she got a good guy. Like, I'm happy for her.

And you should support your partner. So it's hard for me to say without having watched this season, and maybe I'll, maybe I'll see things differently, but right now I'm just like, please, like, we can, we can work it out.

Oh, and like Jordan's like the one who's like really, really friends with Dakota, who I think is like a really toxic guy too. I mean, he's always the one like including— and like they are like the dad talk. And I'm like, well, they're— they both have like such bad motives to me.

No, and it's like Jordan can't really align himself with Dakota because Dakota's single, so Jordan can't move. Or Dakota's not with Jordan.

Is obsessed with like getting all the guys to go to the villa, and especially the single guys. He's like, oh, well, Mason's coming, but he has a girlfriend. It's like, dude, you're married, right? What are you talking about?

Himself with the single people, and then he'll start to behave like them. Like, if he was wanting to go to Vanderpump Villa with Jacob and Zac Efron, then maybe things would be—

oh wait, something really crazy. Oh sure. So they go to LA and Whitney is set up in her house and they're getting ready for Dancing with the Stars, and they were talking to Jen and Zac and they like can't find a place to live, like all the Airbnbs, whatever. They're like, their plans are like just not working out. So Connor like sort of offhand is like, well, if you need a place to stay, you could stay with us for a couple of days. And so Jen, their kids, their nanny, her assistant all move into Whitney's rental for like a couple of days. So I don't know what ends up happening with them, but I know that like Jen hates Whitney. And it's actually crazy because Whitney, at like a very important pivotal time in her life— and she made the arrangements, like, she— this is important to her. She got herself a house. Like, I don't know if the show pays for it. I think the show gives you a stipend, but I think they need, you know, more than a typical apartment.

Like Masked Singer.

Yeah, exactly. So like, they made their own arrangements, and Jen just sort of like moves in like with the biggest moving truck you've ever seen in your whole life. Like, I thought that was really crazy.

And he was like, sometimes the show—

sometimes Connor's generosity like gets us in trouble. Um, and I don't know if it was for— but it's actually insane that like Jen hates Whitney so much when like that's an incredibly generous thing to do. I would never.

Yeah, I'll— oh, that is very nice of Whitney. I can imagine Jen— I'm sure stuff happened behind the scenes, but like they just had such different experiences on Dancing with the Stars.

Like, I could see her hating Whitney just for like thriving in a way that she couldn't.

Jealousy, but it's like frustration at this show and in the fan circumstances and the circumstances. And yeah, and if— and I'm sure other stuff also happens. I don't think Jen would just be like, oh well, she thrived and I'm jealous.

Yeah.

Um, but that is nice that to start that they offered them.

It's so crazy.

And I just can't believe, like, Jen— we already said, like, especially when— now I can speak my truth— when Claudia was doing Masked Singer, that was when Dancing with the Stars was airing, and we were watching Jen and I'm like, this girl has 2 months behind me.

So I had a 4-and-a-half-month-old and I was in hell. She had a 2-and-a-half.

Really?

Yeah, she's behind me because she just posted like 8 months postpartum. I'm almost 10 months postpartum.

Got it. So she was 2 months postpartum, she has 2 other kids, she's moving her whole life, and Dancing with the Stars is like— so it's every single day, all day, every day. Just had 2 kids and you're telling me they did not even have a Home.

Insane.

I thought they did it, you know, they were set up like that. Not that it's ever gonna be easy, but like if you're set up and you're parked and your kids have a house and a backyard and you can go to work, like it's okay. They didn't even have a house.

Insane.

It's harder than I thought.

Yeah.

And that's why I was like trying to just like give Jen so much grace cuz I'm like, this is so hard what she's doing. Yeah. And I feel bad for her. Mm-hmm. And I felt like she could never have passed up this opportunity.

Mm-hmm.

But it might've not been the right time. Agreed. So that's just an empath in me.

Yeah, no, 100%, just an empath.

Oh, and crazy, Dakota says that he slept with Taylor the night before she left to film for Bachelor.

And then there's a scene in like the upcoming trailer where it's like coming up this season is like it looks like they're in bed together. And at that point, like, I do have to unfortunately stop defending Taylor Frankie Paul. Like, if that's the case after last season, like, the fact that she hasn't washed her hands of him is the biggest red flag. And that doesn't make me—

that doesn't bode well for her season of The Bachelor, for her openness to find the love of her life, committed partner, things I believe she's open.

I don't think she's ready. Like, I don't think she's emotionally mature enough.

No, she couldn't even— if the perfect guy came right up to her.

Oh.

And introduced himself, she would be like, where's Dakota?

And then she's like starting to see someone. She met him on TikTok Live. She like was scrolling TikTok, saw this guy singing. Yeah, really bad. But I do feel like he's one of the contestants. He looked like one of the pictures.

Yikes.

She picks him up at the airport.

And Chase. Chase?

Question mark.

He's like in love with her, helping her move out. Yeah, I don't know. I'm surprised he didn't go on The Bachelor. Yeah, maybe he tried. He should have. That's what I meant when we got her cast. I was like, I'm surprised there's no like other storylines here.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they're, they're really doing a good job, or at least trying, all the Hulu shows to like connect them with one another. And so the Vanderpump Villa— but I do feel like Vanderpump Villa is not a popular show and they kind of need to stop forcing it. If it weren't for that one episode where the Mormon Wives went, I don't know if they even would have gotten renewed.

So now it's like the guys are going and it's like, I appreciate the synergy, but with this particular show, like nobody Yeah, and it's like all I want to know is what happened at Vanderpump Villa, but I can't just watch it.

I won't, I won't.

It's like even last season when all I wanted was like more Housewives, Mormon Housewives, I was— it never even occurred to me just to watch it, just watch their episode.

To me, was on this episode, it was like weird, even though I was under the impression that she's not a part of the show anymore. Maybe she leaves in the middle.

Also, did you see the opening credits?

Yeah, Taylor's up.

Wait, but I thought it was so weird. First they're like in cream dresses, they do half the cast, and then they change into these like blue dresses.

And I thought it was weird because they do like how in Housewives like there's— everyone's holding an apple, and every season it's like Taylor's always in the middle, but they're all like— at this one Taylor's up on a platform and they're all underneath her. Like, I thought it was weird.

But why did they switch color dresses? It was like going really party esthetically, and then they went into these like corny princess dresses. First it was like cornfield, like, you know, of the land. Natural.

And I would have thought like maybe in the beginning seasons like Taylor was so much, but now like especially Whitney's there, I really see them all as equal now. Yeah, some maybe less than others. I feel like Miranda, maybe Leila like is on a lower tier, but like for the most part they all are fairly— and actually Leila was slaying last night. She was like, I just don't know how to tell Jesse I fucking hate Jordan, and she just did. Like, I loved it. Like, actually she's the only one is doing anything, um, about like this really just bad guy in our midst.

Yeah. Um, so we'll see about Taylor and Dakota, cuz at this point it's like maybe just be with Dakota.

Yeah, if you can't not—

if you can't not, like be together. That's great forever. Like, and you love each other and you can't quit each other, so just be together.

Yeah.

Forgive each other. Truly.

Move on.

Tabula rasa. And be together cuz you love each other and you have a family. Like, maybe try that. But let's see how it goes on The Bachelorette.

Jackie and I will watch the remaining, uh, as many as we can this weekend. So come back Monday for like a big recap.

Mm-hmm.

Um, but let's dive into Queenie and Weenie, which I'm really excited about. Queenie and Weenie, our weekly segment. Every Friday we like to wrap up the show with a little bit of a Queenie and Weenie where we give out two awards to people this week who acted in Queenie and Weenie-like behaviors. As always, let's start with Queenie. Jackie, would you like to go first?

Yes. My Queenie is something I've Something that happened to us this weekend that we didn't even talk about, but I think it was like taking over the internet and we haven't even— where did we address it? I don't know. But my queenie is the toaster who got us foot massages at the beach.

Yes. We didn't talk about it, but her TikTok went viral.

Yeah. Her TikTok went viral and we experienced it on the other end. Yeah. We were just like at the beach. We didn't even know that this was a service.

I love this.

Yeah. But a masseuse came over and she was like, I'm here to give you a massage.

So we were ready to book. We like got our wallets out. Yeah. We were like, oh cool.

Like, yeah, we'd love one. And she was like, we'll take a 2-hour back rub please. She's like, I have for Jackie and Claudia.

And we were like, note, like a handwritten note.

We were like, oh my God, our husbands got us massages. She was like, no, she was like someone who loves you. And then she gave us this note. It was from a toaster. And the masseuse was telling us like that she wanted to gift us a massage and she also like wanted to come over and say hi, but it didn't seem like a good time. We had all the kids with us, so she was gonna wait and come over later. We're so like, yeah, tell her to come over later. And she never came over and said and introduced herself.

She just gave us each 15-minute foot rubs.

And it was so amazing.

It was.

She is my queenie because because that was just like the highlight of my weekend.

I love that. I'm so glad you brought that up. My queenie is a woman named Mashere Fox. Do you know her? You're gonna love her. A New York woman dug for 3 weeks to find her own diamond for her engagement ring. So what would you do to find your perfect engagement ring? For Mashere Fox, a 31-year-old strategy consultant from New York City, it meant camping out for 3 weeks at Crater of Diamonds State Park in Arkansas with a shovel and a to dig up her own.

Can anybody do that?

I guess. She said she'd been dreaming of finding her own ethically sourced gem about 2 years ago, not lab-grown. And she said, we're not getting engaged until I do that. Um, that's what she told her boyfriend. They come from the ground, what's stopping us from just getting one ourselves? She's like Miles Teller's grandma. After researching, she discovered that the only active public diamond mine in the world wasn't overseas but just a short flight away. Fox headed south after finishing grad school, staying in a tent and digging daily from 8 to 4 PM. Taking only one day off. The summer heat was brutal. She admits she was physically unprepared. There were days where I wouldn't shower for several days, she said. By the time I got out, I was so tired and hurt I couldn't muster the energy to spend 10 minutes undressing and taking a shower. She says her shovel was even stolen at one point, forcing her to walk 3 hours round trip to the nearest hardware store. On July 29th, her final day, she went out—

she couldn't get an Uber.

She's in the middle of like this random field. She went out one last time and noticed a glimmer by her foot. I thought it was dew, she said. I potted it with my hiking boot, and it didn't move. It turned out to be a 2.3-carat diamond, the third largest ever discovered in the park. Crater of Diamonds State Park averages 1 to 2 diamond finds per day. Most are small. Only about a dozen exceed 1 carat annually, according to the assistant park superintendent, Waymon Cox. She hasn't had her diamond appraised yet and doesn't plan to. For her, the value lies in what the stone represents.

Yeah, that's really great.

And here, that's it. That's it, like, raw.

I see. So yeah, 2 carats. I was gonna ask, like, what the size was. I just have, like, 2 questions.

Very pretty too. Her boyfriend's name is Trevor.

Why didn't she make him dig? Like, That's love. Go dig me a diamond.

I'm cracking up.

Why is she digging her own? These women do too much. Did she propose to herself too?

The women do too much.

And like, what's wrong with lab-grown?

Well, I think that a huge reason why lab-grown is so popular is because how diamonds are sourced is really—

I saw the funniest meme that was like a person with a huge diamond ring and they're like, you'll never know it's not lab. Oh my God.

Well, part of the reason why lab is so popular is like because there's not any, you know, nefarious origins.

So I saw that movie, Blood Diamond. Oh my God, saw that movie too.

One of the worst— like a great movie, wish I never saw it.

Stuck with you.

Of course, that scene of the kid getting injected with heroin, like seriously, kill me. One of the worst movies.

Um, maybe that's why she saw the movie and was like, I will not have—

we're heading to Arkansas.

Yeah, I'll get my own.

That's a queenie right there.

Yeah. Um, but did she say why lab wasn't good enough for her?

Maybe she wanted natural. She didn't want the strings that come with perhaps this being a blood diamond, so she minded herself.

Yeah, well, she should have sent her man. And that's my only— yeah, um, do what you want. For weenie, two things. My weenie is Jordan because the way he was acting on last night's episode, like, was complete weenie behavior, like trying to outshine his wife. It's like Bro, no. And even if you could, like, who wants to do that to their wife?

Yeah, right.

Take away— you know what I mean?

He's a real narcissist.

But what was so funny is last night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Sutton called Amanda a weenie.

You're kidding.

I was like— I was listening and I was like to Zach, like, what did she say?

Call her?

And he was like, a weenie. She was like, don't be— I don't believe you. Yeah, Sutton.

That's Queenie Sutton.

Queenie Sutton. And I'm not gonna make Amanda my weenie. No, no, no. Like, honestly, that's so funny. I'm so fatigued by Amanda Francis.

Me too.

And the conversations around her. Uh, I know you're about to drop your bombshell, but I just— I wanted to note, last night watching Amanda, like, I'm, I'm very tired, exhausted by it. Like, the storyline has run its course. I feel bad for her. I don't know what she's doing there. I guess people online are being mean to her. I don't have anything like mean to say, and I—

you're just tired.

I don't mind her at all. I just like, she— it's like two separate, complete separate storylines are happening, and I just like She seems tired too. I felt bad.

It's not a good fit.

I don't think so.

So my weenie, aka my bombshell, goes out to the person who left this note on my windshield yesterday. Many 3-year-olds have trouble staying within the lines. Maybe if you practice coloring this cat, it will help you with your parking. Wow. Here.

Here.

So let me tell you.

Is it anyone in this room?

Well, I did come in and I started asking questions, and let me tell you, you're gonna love this. So this morning, yesterday, I actually, I parked here and then I was driving around all day. I didn't park anywhere else. A few hours later, I didn't even see the note until 2 hours later. They put it like the top of my windshield. I don't know if they didn't want me to see it or something. And then it started raining and it started sliding down. I said, what the hell is that? And I was like, oh my God, the only place I parked today was here. Now when I left, I did notice my wheel was on the line. I'm sorry, if you're on the line, you're fine. It was not veering. My wheel was on line. So I'm like, is that what they were referring to? To and was parked between two cars. One car was a blue Mazda. We know that's Ben from the studio. The other— and I remember thinking—

was a white Tesla. No, no, no, it was me, Jackie.

I remember walking by this car and like actually being like, it was pretty much totaled. Like, it was the bones of a vehicle. It looked like it had been through an incinerator. It had no handles on any of the doors. It was covered in rust. The entire, like, left side, the side that I walked by, looked like it had been hit in, like, maybe 6 or 7 accidents. The bumper was completely half off. I was like, how did this car even get here? So I presume it was the owner of that car who left this on my windshield. And I just— I'm shocked that, first of all, I didn't know that there were, like, like, actual losers who walked around with cars, because he must have had them on.

Right, that's the thing. It's not like he wrote you a note like, park better.

Like, you placed an order.

He placed an order for these. You carry these around to anyone know who's remotely outside the line. He's using them too liberally. He's gonna run out.

He's using them too liberally. And the crazy thing is that like you thought about all of this, you bought the cards, you literally have so much time on your hands, but you don't have the time to get your car fixed.

Like fix your car, put a handle on it. All those accidents on your car, like weren't just the other person.

They're not an endorsement of great driving.

Right.

So, and I've actually never had anybody put a thing on my car, so I've never experienced what it would feel like. And I can tell you it actually felt like very invasive.

Like yeah.

Yeah, there's my car seat in there. Like, that's my car. That's like— I feel like I'd been burglarized. Like, I wasn't aware of the drama. Okay, drama. I wasn't aware of like the feelings that it would feel like to have somebody touch my car.

And obviously such an unhinged person. Now let me ask you a question. Do you think that came from a man or a woman? We're saying he. I kind of think it's she.

No, because you want to know why? Look, it has this thing, so that means he kept them in his car and it has like a line down the middle. So it was kept in his wallet, and only men have wallets where like you need to fold.

That's true, but like only women—

no, this is absolutely man. The cat with the Comic Sans, like cat is giving woman. The cat is giving weenie, actually. So I don't care, it's a genderless, non-binary weenie.

I'm just wondering if we could potentially—

and then today when I got here, cameras today, that's what I asked if we had cameras. We don't. Today when I got here, I drove around the parking lot a couple times looking for the car because it's so recognizable, and I was gonna put this back. I'm gonna keep it, actually.

No, when you see the car again, you will leave it on his car.

Yeah, of course. Um, I drove around today looking for it, but like, I couldn't believe I got my first. And let me tell you, I have parked some really annoying bad ways. Actually, I'm always remarking on how the spots here are very generous.

Yeah, there's not really a bad way to park here.

I did not park badly. Like, I didn't deserve the note. And there are times when I deserve the note and I would have laughed, but I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? Get your dirty fingernails off of my car. Mind your own business. Take your car to the shop and fuck all the way off.

Yeah, weenie. So what he said was, good luck trying to drive. Good job trying to drive. Yeah.

And I want to say, remember when that kid said that to me?

No. When I tried to parallel park here and her mom had to come and do it and get in the car for you. Yeah, in the car for me and left me with her kids. And I was like, well, she's not gonna steal my car because I have her kids. And then when it was all said and done, the kid was like to me, good job trying to drive. That's what she ate with that, bestie. That's— and I said, say less, bestie.

Thus concludes a very long episode. So we are going to let you guys go. Um, thank you so much for listening to The Toast on Monday Morning Show. We deliver the fastest stories you need to know. So if you're watching this on YouTube, please subscribe, give this video a thumbs up, have a beautiful day.

But when everything is a lot, a nalafi— is anything a nalafi?

I don't know.

You know, if they're always a nice long one for you area, then are they even long anymore?

If that's the standard, are they just being— Happy Friday! Have an amazing weekend, guys, and we'll see you on Monday.

Love ya, bye! Hast du bei der Steuer auch diesen Schul-Flashback, einfach irgendwas raten und dann hoffen, dass es stimmt? Gar nicht. WISO Steuer ist so mein Safe Space. Du meinst, damit ist alles sicher? Ja, genau. WISO Steuer ist so die Steuer-App, die dich einfach versteht. Egal ob Studium, Job oder Umzug. Stimmt, krass. Fühlt sich gar nicht wie Steuern an. Steuern erledigt? Safe! Mit WISO Steuer.