Transcript of Giggling about reality tv, family feuds, and flare ups

What's up, gigglers? Gary, fix your WiFi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

I mean, the day just got away from me.

Hello, my glorious gigglers.

I have a lot of things on my dog yet.

So much to talk about. And can I just say, people were like, Are you going to have enough to talk about with two episodes a week? I'm like, We've been holding back. We've been holding back. Now we can open the floodgates. Let's go.

What do you have? Give us one weekend where we haven't spoken, and it's like, I have eight business ideas. We're literally... And we haven't seen each other. We're like two Coke heads that got together. No, we're literally two Coke heads that got together on a Friday night when we haven't seen each other for a week. We're like, should we start a business?

I don't know what Coke is like, but I'd imagine this is it. We had some drama today.

I've been to sound off.

You're on the boots journalism for the Victoria Beckham family... What would you call it? Massacre?

Family Feud. Yeah. Bring in Steve Harvey. Family Feud.

Everyone is waiting to hear your take.

Okay. I was on a set today, so I was in the perfect conducive situation for when this dropped to talk. I was in the glam room. I read it aloud to everyone. I actually got complimented on my reading, so take that, guys.

Okay. They're getting paid by you. Continue.

Not true. I went full Brooklyn Beckham mode.

Oh, you went British?

Yeah. Yeah, I did. First thing I want to say before we really get into the meat of it was this was a really stupid thing on my part, but when I'm reading it, I thought, oh, So British people spell Mom, M-U-M. Now, I was under the impression that's just how they said it. I didn't know they spelt it. I thought they spelled it M-O-M, but they just said Mom.

No, they go full Mom.

I was like, Wait, you guys just changed the whole word, though. But dad is dad?

That's true. It's short for mommy. Mom-a.

Which is mommy.

We're thrown. So honestly, we were unable to really understand. We couldn't get past that.

My reading comprehension definitely dwindled after the first mom because I was like...

I feel like I can't take a guy seriously when he calls his mom Mom. Is that offensive to the British community? I'd rather them say Mother.

I just didn't know that's how they spelt it.

It's like a girl saying Dade.

Now...

But we We digress.

Okay, let me first and foremost say Victoria Beckham, Till I Die. Okay?

Well, I was going to say- Till I Die. Page is related/very good friends with this, so she's going to have a bias take. But anyway, continue with- I always have a friend's back, and Victoria is no different to me.

I have her back on this one. With that said, obviously, I am not estranged from my family, but I can imagine imagine that if that is...

You're like, But I imagine it every day. I think about, What if I just press the block button?

If I told my mom and dad I was going no contact with them, they'd say, Great, we'll come, too. They would be like, What?

They go, Who are we blocking? The call is coming from inside the house, Mom.

Contact where? We'll contact you. Anyway. But I can imagine that if you are feeling that way, there's obviously some truth to what he's saying. If he felt that he needed to put this out on Instagram. Do I think that the Beckham family likes a photo app of their family and there's some type of press? Like, yeah, I'm Sure. Now, there were a couple of parts that I was like, That's interesting, bringing Marc Anthony into it. What did Marc Anthony do to be brought in to this situation? And I know he's talking about He was talking about his actual wedding, and that Mark Anthony was supposed to introduce him and his wife for the first time, and it was actually a dance with him in Victoria. Now, when I got to that part, I said, Now, this is written the way I would have written it? In my head, I was like, Okay, this possibly could be his wife, which I don't fault either, because I think if you're married, yeah, that's my husband. I have his back. That's my wife. I have my back. I'm going to be real.

You think she wrote it and he was like, We got to just change it to mom, so people think I said it? It's literally her, and then he's like, Mom. I've never seen a straight man post that many paragraphs about something. True. I I actually think... But he is British, and they love the English language, so he could be a Shakespearean novelist, for all I know.

It was giving Prince Harry, I'm Leaving the Monarchy. That was the vibe I was getting.

Well, they are royalty, that family. I do think it was weird that Mark Anthony was catching strays. It almost was giving like when you're, See you in court, where it's like you mention someone, so then they have to say their part. Speaking of fucking see you in court, guess you got goddamn jury duty. No.

I will say it was a giggler at the DOJ. Literally, there's someone down at... Yeah, I'm fucking pissed.

Someone was like, Oh, you want to make fun of us? You want to make fun of us?

You motherfuckers. Do you want to be hilarious? Down at the goddamn Soho Court. I will show up there and I will... No, I'm not going to threaten a government building. That's really terrifying. Let's calm down.

Well, look, honestly, you said see you in court enough that they're like, Cool. See you there.

You know what? Actually do a civic duty.

Wait, that's fucking crazy.

No, I'm actually pissed.

Back to Brooklyn. I want to say, I think there's multiple truths to a lot of stories.

Totally. So many things can be true at once.

I could totally see him getting annoyed that his family's like, Can you please support us in all these ventures? And he's like, They're so annoying. And then you didn't support this. It is interesting, though, because it did go around that his wife was the bad person for not wearing Victoria Beckham's dress.

He said that she pulled out. Okay, here's one thing that I think we should dive into because I think this is very pertinent. Typically, I feel like there's... How many siblings? There's four of them. I mean, is it a coincidence that all of the other siblings are like, We don't fuck with you either? Are they just going blindly with the parents, or is Brooklyn being crazy and they're like, What's going on with you?

Well, this is what I don't like. I don't like family drama and relationship drama. You know when you love two people, but they're horrible to each other, and they're telling you stories, and you're like, You're both fucking crazy. That's how I feel in this. This is family drama that is their shit, and it should not be aird. Granted, he's basically saying, They keep coming from me in the press, and he's had enough. But I just feel like the family stuff, no one's good or bad. It's like, this is deep layers of family trauma that they're working through.

This isn't just one fight. This is years and years Exactly.

It's like when you talk to a couple that broke up and someone says something and you're like, That's fucking valid. Then the other person says something, you're like, Very valid.

You guys are not- Except when I break up with someone.

Yeah, 100%. They're not valid. 100%. By the way, we are drinking our Duncan Refreshers. Oh, my God. So good. Because this is a late episode. We've both been working all day. Actually, I was shopping.

I've been literally working all day.

No. Are you okay?

You try being I'm an influencer. Actually, this happened two weeks ago, but I forgot to bring it up because I think it's so funny, though. Did you see that Scooter? You know that Scooter Braun and Sydney Sweeney are dating, right? Yeah.

They had that Central Park photoshoot.

Yes. Who could have forgot? Did you see that he came out and he was like, I think it's- He came out?

Finally.

He goes, I think it's really rude and offensive that professional athletes are DMing my girlfriend, when they know we're together. The audacity of like, what, dude? Yes, because everyone in the world is just going to respect you that you're dating someone.

Well, first of all, you're not married. Second of all, those football players are not your friends. They're nice to you because you're rich. They're not your friends. They don't respect you, and they will steal your girl if you slip up.

Such a funny... That's such a classic guy. Hey, I don't like that, so don't do it. Okay, well, the world doesn't work like that.

Also, I love that Sydney Sweeney is telling him which guys are DMing her. Good for her. Make him mad.

No, we didn't break that down more.

Actually, I've probably never not told a guy if someone DM me because we have one life. We have one life. I celebrate it.

The only time I haven't is where I'm like... I'm not going to say this because he'll get in his head about it, but I keep it in my back pocket Because any time I'm like, Oh, my God, look who just DM me wants to go on a date.

I don't say if it's an ex-boyfriend that's annoying. It's more like to piss them off.

Yeah, get a little pep in their step.

Yeah, let them know there's people in line.

Okay, my next thing that's on my docket. She's literally going through her notes. Yeah, I'm looking down. Kim Kardashian. I don't know why she would do this to me, but she came out... Did you see the shoes she came out with in Nike?

Did I see? My DMs were flooded. And I think you might be a little perturbed because Kim Kardashian might be a little Hannah-coated.

Not only was it a Mary Jane sneaker, it was a freaking tabby Mary Jane. Do you know what a tabby is?

It's a cat.

Yes, absolutely. It's the shoes that have the toe is cut out. It looks like your toes... Like a hoof.

It looks like a I love an ugly lamp, and I love an ugly shoe, and I support that shoe with my life.

I've never been a fan of the tabby. I feel like it's a little... My assistant has a tabby, but she looks cute and cool in it. I don't love them for myself. But a Mary Jane tabby, I think, is diabolical. I think what Kim Kardashian did was diabolical.

Can I say something about trends, though? If every cool If your real influencer was wearing it, you would.

I've been shot.

Wait, that was the meanest thing I've ever said to you. That was so weird. She's speechless. She's a tear coming. She doesn't even have a witty remark back. She's a babe.

Did I do something to you? No. Have I offended you in some way?

No, I'm saying you are being socially- We all heard what you said. You're being socially constructed to think certain things are beautiful when beauty's in the eye of the beholder.

Anywho.

Well, are you okay? We just had a flare up. We just had a full flare up on a Monday.

I worked a whole fucking eight-hour a day, and I don't need to come home to this shit.

We're literally a married couple. You're like, I've been working, and I just wanted some peace and quiet and calmness, not to get attacked in my own fucking home. With that said, I think you're also triggered because you know where I am right now. I'm in Colorado, and I have to tell you, I performed in the Denver Theater, the scene of the crime. If anyone doesn't remember, you could listen to the episode, Paige had a panic attack in so many words.

Do you want to know what Hannah did? My sweet, sweet friend, she sent me a panorama video of the green room and said, Paige, it was right over there where you lost your shit.

So these theaters, there's a guy who produces it, and this guy does all the Colorado shows. So I get in the car and I realized this is the same guy as that show. But he's so nice.

I need to never see any of these people ever again.

He's like, Welcome back. And I'm like, So great to be here. I missed it here. Page says, Hi. And then I get to the green room, and honestly, I did start feeling a little headache. I think I was dehydrated. And there's no air in Denver. There's no air. I texted him and he comes down. He's like, Can I get you anything? I said, Is it possible to just get a little Advil or something? And he's like, Sure, sure. And he runs and grabs and he comes back and he goes, Is everything okay? I'm like, No.

They have a file on us. They have a literal file.

He literally was like, Are you good? I'm like, No, we're good. And he started laughing. He's like, I just can never forget your agent trying to nicely talk to Paige and say it's okay if she doesn't want to go on stage. And then you basically kicking her onto the stage. I said, That's what friends are for. I'm not here with your fucking soft motivation.

If you don't have a friend that takes you out of your comfort zone, what's the point? What is the point?

Then in my travels, as you guys know, I'm on tour without Paige, which is so weird. I'm just doing dumb shit alone with Ali. Do you know when the plane is really small? So even though you have a small luggage, it might not fit. And my luggage, when you accidentally open the wrong zipper and it expands the luggage. Yeah. And obviously, I'm not organized enough to be like, I should zipper this and compress it again. I'm with my fully outzipped luggage, and I get there, and I'm the first one to put it in. Everyone's waiting for me, and it can't go in. And the lady's looking at me, and I look at her, I'm like, Could you just sneak this back? And she goes, We don't really do coats here. I said, Okay. And in my head, I know for a fact, because it's so full, the only way to get to zip is for me to sit on it. I'm like, I'm not in a public in the middle of the plane, putting my bag down, sitting on it, and trying to zip around.

While everyone's waiting to board.

Literally. I'm panicking, and I just start letting people go past me. I'm just sitting holding my bag. Ali comes in, my little angel savior, and I'm panicking, and she's like, Put it on the ground, put it on the ground. She stands on it, and then I zipper it under her, and we're dying laughing. Everyone is like, who let these girls on? And then I had to... Everyone was just staring at me the whole flight.

So you have a new wife?

No.

Okay. Well, that's what it sounds like.

No, but she was supportive in a time of need. However, you would have just pointed and laughed at me.

I would have been like, What do you want me to do?

But I literally... She must be so annoyed because I just talked about you all yesterday when we were in the green room, and she cried there. And then she locked herself in the bathroom there, and then she couldn't get her corset on here. And then her mom answered the phone and told her to stop it over there.

Don't forget, I vomited at some point. I was air-gagging.

Oh, God.

Okay, wait. The next thing I have to bring up is, are you on Chinese Girl TikTok?

No, but my husband speaks Mandarin, so I feel like I should be.

Okay. I was diagnosed as Chinese, which I'm very proud of. It is all of these Chinese girls basically giving you their morning routines on how they stay so... Their skin is so glowy and how they just stay healthy, which actually it's going to annoy me because my mom has said this to me forever, and I've been like, Shut up, mom. I love an ice cold anything. I love my ice cold Stanley. I love an ice cold soda. It has to be freezing.

You even put your face in ice cold water.

I love it. I'll stuff myself in the freezer. I don't care. They said that the number one thing is when you first wake up, that you should not drink anything cold. So hot water with lemon immediately. And then they're drinking bone broth for breakfast because they're waking their bodies up slowly and naturally. And I love an ice coffee. I'm an ice coffee girl all year round. But I've been drinking hot water with lemon in the morning before I I still have a nice coffee, but before I do anything, it's life-changing.

How so? Because I have follow-up questions.

Okay. I feel like some, and this might just be me, but I feel like you get to a point with your caffeine where you're like, Okay, my body's not responding to it anymore. I really would like to go to the bathroom. Maybe I'll have just a little bit more coffee, and then I'll go. For whatever reason, the hot water with lemon, one works immediately, if not sooner. It's almost like your body season is like, I've got to go. It does wake you up in such a different way, but a better way. I feel like you have coffee immediately. It's like jolting you into the future. You're like, Holy shit.

How much lemon are we talking?

Like, a slice. But then there's all these videos of other things, like goji berries that they put in tea and all this other stuff. They also have a tea in the morning.

I do trust a tea because people have been doing it for so long. I also actually do like this because this isn't a crazy investment for the girls to be like, Oh, you got to buy this crazy thing. Get some lemons.

You know I love Chinese medicine.

Yes. Can I also just say we never make the gigglers ride at Dawn for anything. We don't like to get them to Be mean to people. We don't want to get them around. This is a place of love and light. That's their own issues. I know, but I never asked them to do anything. Nana still got it, is getting attacked on threads right now. And she doesn't know. She doesn't know, and she's listening, so she just found out because she doesn't even know that her posts automatically go to threads. So Nana is getting bullied on threads when she didn't even sign up for it.

Wait, this is not funny. It's actually elder abuse. This is legit elder abuse.

It's fucked up.

Hannah texted the group chat, me and Grace and Hannah, and she goes, Oh, my God. Nana's literally getting bullied. You have to go on. Hannah, I clicked into it.

No. I'm really upset.

It's actually why I feel like Giggly Squad is so important. These older women of a totally different generation of us that we're not We're not allowed to live alone. We're not allowed to decide if they wanted to get married or not or have children or not. A lot are, I seem, like boy moms from the South. But anyway, it's terrifying. The women that are attacking Nana are 65 plus. 65 is generous.

You will always have haters no matter what age if you're a star.

No, I was like, Wait, so this is never-ending for me. Sorry.

Okay, so for anyone who doesn't about my Nana. Nana still got it. She loves her fans more than anything. She loves them more than me.

She loves her fans.

Now, Nana, the thing with Nana is Nana has been gorgeous since the day I met her out of the womb. When she walks into a restaurant, everyone looks at her and thinks she's famous. I always just thought she was a star. She is the most naturally beautiful woman, Italian and just stunning. And yes, she stays out of the sun. She doesn't drink, she doesn't smoke, and she sleeps on her back.

Never had a needle to the face.

She doesn't even have her ears pierced. She also just hates pain, and she also just takes care of herself. But she is abnormally beautiful for her age. I will say that. It is jarring, and I show it off a lot. But she has never done plastic surgery, not against plastic surgery, but she hasn't. Then she also has no idea how to use filters. This woman innocently sits in the corner of her living room and asks her husband to take photos of her outfits because her fans like to see what she puts on each day. It's the very a la page. My Shaila. My Shaila. She's perfect and has never done anything to hurt anybody, and she wants world peace. She posts this photo of her sitting in her living room and says, My husband took these photos. Can you imagine? She asked her 86-year-old husband to take photos of her. My husband took these photos of me this morning. I can't believe I will be 85 next month. Where did the time go? And look, is she eating that up? Yes. Is she like, Keep your foot on bitch's necks? Maybe.

Is she taking her orthopedic and putting it on your nana's neck? Absolutely. Now look.

Also, by the way, Nana loves all Nanas. She loves all her friends. She gets along with all of them. She supports all of her older friends. Now, the first fucking comment, Karen. Scott. 7509. Say the name, girl. It's Karen. It's Karen Scott. Is this any of yours grandma? You better give her a fucking talking to, okay?

Someone come get their grandma.

You are not 85. Your hands would show it. By the way, her hands-Fuck you, bitch. Are not filtered. They look like her hands. There's nothing you can do to hide the age of your hands. I don't know what that means. Then people are like, Yeah, and I'm 16. People are like, A filter can do miracles. Hands have cosmetic surgery, too. All these... They're saying she's getting vein removal. It is crazy. But it's all because she's so beautiful, which brings me to my next point.

As a woman- Mental health moment. Mental health moment it up.

As a fucking woman, If you don't age gracefully, no one respects you. If you get surgery to look better, people bully you. If you age beautifully, people bully you. Anyway, everyone defend Nana on Nana Still Got It's Threads account because I'm losing on someone.

If you're born a woman, you're going to get bullied. That's what it is.

Basically, I had a premonition of you at 84 posting a gorgeous photo of people being like, There's your nose down.

I'm going to be fucking these bitches up. I'm going to be in the comments at 85 being like, I have nothing to lose. I'm coming to in her house.

I do have to say there are a bunch of beautiful photos of other grandmas saying, I'm 80 years old. I've never smoked or drank. I give thanks to our good Lord for my health. Didn't need to get religion involved, but here we are. And she looks so cute. And this other person said, This is my mom at 84. No fillers, no hair dye.

We've gone international.

Yeah, so it's going viral. There's There's beautiful comments, but there's also people being mean. And there's something about people saying something. Here someone goes, Please share what filter you use. You look great. But then there's a lot of people that are just like, You look amazing. I love you. But anyway, it's hard being a It really is.

It really is. No, people are nuts.

But then again, if people aren't hating on you... But also, my grandma should not be posting on Instagram. She should not be dealing with trolls at 85 years old. Maybe I should talk to her.

I couldn't imagine seeing an older woman and being like...

I'm going to hate on her. Well, the fact that people are jealous of Nana, like iconic.

No, it's actually iconic.

Like, she's just living her life and people are talking bad.

Girl, I can only hope that these bitches are jealous of me. Are still mad. To 85. Yeah.

Can I just say, if people aren't mad, you're not doing enough. You got to keep these bitches mad.

That's our mental health moment. I have a whole list of people that if I get murdered, I know for a fact it's one of these five. It's one of these five. You don't have to go anywhere. I've done the research. I know who it is.

So thank you, guys. We write a Dawn Fernanda still got it. And every grandma, every giggler grandma.

I feel like this goes without saying, but we support grandmas.

This is a pro not bullying grandma's podcast.

I don't know what you've heard on in the street, but we are pro grandma. We don't condone bullying grandmothers.

I'm going to take a huge step here and say, Let's not bully grandmas.

I'm going to go out on a limb here. Go out on a limb.

Anti-grandma bullying right here.

And say, The elderly are off limits. Okay? I mean, what are we, Genshaw? Get a goddamn grip, people. Oh my God. No. People need to touch grass. It's so crazy.

My God. Oh.

Support for today's episode comes from Square, the system powering like half the places that I go. If you've ever tapped to pay and thought, wow, that was fast. It was probably Square. So whether you're selling lattes, cutting hair, detailing cars, or running a design studio, Square helps you run your business without running yourself into the ground. I love going to Blue Bottle coffee in the city, and they use Square. And honestly, it's just a quick, easy checkout. Square is the platform behind the scenes of many businesses you already love. Square gives you one connected system to take payments, manage inventory, run payroll, send invoices, and track it all from one place. Because it makes running a business feel a little less like putting out fires, Square simplifies the messy stuff. It works for one location shops and businesses with multiple teams or service areas. Square accepts every major payment method, TAP, CHIP, Apple Pay, online. So if you're starting a business or running one that deserves better tools, Square helps you sell, manage, and grow without slowing down. Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square. Com/go/giggly. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E. Com/go/giggly.

Run your business smarter with Square.

Get started today. Wait, did you see? And I'm I'm offended by it.

Okay.

There was a big article that was like, New for 2026 is having admin night with your friends.

Paige. Okay. I also know when I'm being... There are moments where I'm like, Hannah, you didn't make that up. People have been saying that for years. No. Sit down.

No, we made up admin.

Okay. Admin originated for us. Oh, hi, Daphne. Because British Dave... Oh, my God, she's so cute. I was dating, and I asked him why I think they lost the war to us. And he said it was too much admin. And that's hilarious. And then we started saying, Are other people saying admin? What were you going to say about it?

To the people that wrote that article and all the me and grandmas out there, I'm coming for you.

Yeah, they were like, Admin night is a thing the girls are doing.

No, they're not. Yeah, no, they're not.

Where?

That's crazy. Where are people doing that?

Well, there is this thing with ADHD that I've diagnosed myself with called body doubling. It actually is so true. I won't clean my room, but I'll call a friend or my mom, let's be honest, call my mom and just have her in the room to watch me do something. It makes me do it. It's strange. Or you need to send an email, and if someone's in the room, I'm like, I'm sending the email, and I need them there to hold me accountable, almost.

Whenever I'm going to talk to my friend Stephanie, I know that I'm going to be on the for four hours, so I literally pick a project. I'm like, I'm going to actually reorganize all my makeup. And she's like, amazing.

By the way, I hung out with Stephanie this weekend.

I know. How fun. But also I'm so happy I wasn't there because I never want to go to Denver ever again in my whole entire life. And Stephanie lives there, and she knows that about me. And she's like, But maybe you'll come. And I'm like, never.

I was trying I'm going to convince her to move to New York.

I'm like, I can't breathe here. How do you guys breathe?

Yeah, breathing is top of it.

It's really crucial for me. Yeah. Wait, I see that you have on the list, and I wanted to bring it up, too, is traders. Okay.

Actually- I'm so excited. Wait. Yeah.

Wait. Yeah. I don't know why I have so much energy right now.

So do I. I almost had a drink at dinner, but I was like, no, I'll probably be bad on giddly. God forbid, I have a cocktail.

One episode, we should just get hammered.

Yeah, I was thought... Yeah, I think we should.

I think we should. We have to be in person. Yeah. Because I'll just log off.

You'll just fall asleep, and I'll be like, Hello?

Do you remember that time I had to take a Zoom when I was in Italy and I felt like... Guys, one time me and Hannah had probably the most important Zoom we've ever had to this date, and I was six hours ahead.

And I'm trying to be You've been up for 17 hours. You were jet lagged.

I was like, No, guys, I'm good. And Hannah texted me and she was, You're falling asleep.

I was like, Get a Post-it, put a fake eye on it, put it over your eye because your eyes are closed. You got to figure something out, babe. I'm awake up. You had to apologize. Remember, you were like, sorry, I'm jet lagged.

Okay, stop, Anna. Okay. This is going to get a little serious. I'm curious. And then we're going to go back to fun.

Okay.

Now, I actually have not started watching this season of Traitors because my schedule, it just hasn't aligned. Sometimes I like to have a bunch of Traitors episodes, and then I'll just go and watch them all. So I have not started it. But I've obviously seen spoilers. I've seen the cast of who's on it. I didn't watch The Bachelor. I don't watch The Bachelor. I haven't watched The Bachelor since the fourth grade when the first Bachelorette won, and she's still with her husband, and And I love that for her. So I did not watch when Colton was straight on the bachelor.

I did.

But for people that don't know, Colton went on the bachelor. He was straight. He picked a girl. Okay, great. He proceeds to harass the fuck out of this girl. She has to file a restraining order. He put a tracker on her car. What else did he do? He fake would text her. He would text and call her so much that she couldn't even use her phone. Then he would text her from other numbers and act like it's someone else. She thought she had another stalker, and then he admitted to it. He had a restraining order against him. I think you have to get a restraining order against someone. I think that person has to be arrested. Oh, also, my brother called me and was like, Please stop talking about legal stuff because you have no idea what you're talking about. The defendant isn't the only people that picked the jury. Okay, Gary, don't mansplain. I said, Okay. I said, Okay, I'm not a lawyer. Let's digress.

I hope he felt good about himself when he said that to you. Also, Gary, this isn't for you. Stop listening.

Turn it off. Actually, no. He works with a giggler, and she was like, You should tell your sister she's stupid. But anyway.

I digress. I digress.

He's like, No, I know. Anyway, so Colton, he does all of this weird shit to this girl, all of this highly illegal, stalking shit to this girl.

This is the girl who's dating-What's her name? Michelle Randolph. It's her sister. That's who won the bachelor with him. Shut the fuck up. And she's equally as stunning.

The girl that's dating Glenn Powell?

Yes. Her sister is who Colton... She's gorgeous, but her sister is equally as gorgeous. Cassie. She's gorgeous, perfect. She was like an angel. She was like... Yeah, so that's who Colton picked.

I'm livid. No, I'm livid.

Also, his name is Colton. Anyway, continue.

So Colton does all this weird fucking illegal shit to this woman, and then all of a sudden comes out as gay, and everybody forgets that he stalked this woman's life for months and months on end. Tell me why you get a job. Why are you casted on a big hit national television show? And not only why are you casted getting a paycheck, why the fuck are you getting a nice guy edit? You're a stalker weirdo. If any girl ever did any of that to a guy, was arrested, had a restraining order. Actually, one time there was a rumor about me that someone had a restraining order against me.

You have diabolical rumors on you.

No, that one really scared me because I was like, Wait, are people going to think this?

You're like, Gary? No, literally, I called my brother. I take back all the bad things I said about you.

I was like, How do I prove that I don't have a restraining order against me? He was like, You'd have to be arrested. Anyway, I digress.

Yeah, I digress.

I haven't watched it because I kept seeing all of these clips, and it's actually pissing me off that this guy is getting a nice guy edit on a massive show.

Well, he's also taking charge. He's like, This is what I think, and this is what's going on. He's a big character.

You're watching?

Babe, I'm caught up. Babe, I'm... Girl, babe. That was my big announcement.

I'm livid. I don't even know why I'm so mad about it.

I feel like people are mad I'm sad of him, though.

I think it's good. I think it's the fact because in reality TV, the men just get away with so much. It makes me sick to my stomach. Sorry, you can lie for years and years.

Can't cancelable thing When things happen, they get protected, and then the girl looks crazy for reacting to it. Continue.

No, insane. I want to be like, NBC, why did you How do you even hire this person?

The truth is that a man can do something, but he's good-looking.

This guy, I don't even... How do you have an agent? How are you even walking into production companies and being like, Yeah, hire me. I just think it sends a really... I'm also like- No, it sends a horrible message. It sends a really horrible message to women, and women are primarily who's watching reality TV. So you're basically telling all of these younger women who are watching this show that if a guy does any of this to you and you report it, it's okay because he's still going to go on and live a fine life. Then I think that Cassie girl, she's not on TV anymore. I don't even think she's like an info. I don't think she does anything public.

She's probably has such a terrible experience that she's like, I don't want to be involved in any of this public shit anymore.

Anyway, I think he's disgusting, and I think he should be not hired ever again on anything. Sorry, you can't stalk someone and then just be like, Sorry, didn't mean it. No, you're creepy and weird.

Well, yeah, there was no explanation for it.

I'm going to add him to my list in case I get murdered.

He's on the list. He's on the list.

Anyhow.

The reason why I started watching Traitors is one thing about me, I do love a game.

Yeah.

I don't love watching reality TV because I know how the sausage is made, so it lost the magic for me. However, people are loving Traitors, and I was getting frustrated that from the clips, I still couldn't figure out what the rules were. And I just wanted to... The rules are fucking complicated.

It's like There are no rules.

It's actually rugby.

They make them up as they go.

It's like rugby. I don't think anyone knows what the rules are. They're just running around. And yeah, they do keep changing them. And it took me three episodes to understand, okay, so it's different to be banished than to be murdered. And traitors can't Can be banished, but they can't be murdered. That shit is complicated. I went to college. I've been watching it, and it really is fascinating because it is like a bunch of rats in an experiment. I don't mean like snitches. I mean like a social experiment where you just put a bunch of creatures together and see how they interact. The truth with the game is there's so much luck involved, too. There's no way to just win the game. You have to have so many things go your way.

I see so many people that are like, Oh, my God, you and Hannah should go on or go on traitors. First, I would never go on without you. And second, they'd have to make us both traitors because if I'm a traitor, I'm obviously going to tell you.

In the first episode, you go, Bitch. No, you wouldn't even tell me. You just look at me and go, You're a fucking traitor.

They'd have to make both of us traitors because- Also, Paige, could you imagine me Me lying to you? Oh, you want me to lie to my best friend? What are you teaching America? That's rude.

Imagine me lying to you.

Also, here's the other thing, Hannah. They take your phone for two weeks. You can't watch TV. You can't have your laptop.

I can't defend Nana on threads. I can't defend Nana.

No, what am I, going to jail? And also you have to run. No.

So this is my one problem with it. My gripe is that I don't understand why they have the physical activities because it reminds me of the challenge, but I guess they're getting more money, and it's like, these people already have money. What do we do? Put it to charity or something. I don't know.

I don't get the money part.

I don't understand. And yeah, some people get shields and shit, but I don't really care about that. All I want to see is these bitches at the roundtable going at it for a full hour. That's what I want to see. Done. No breaks, no food.

No, I think that- I'm turning to a producer. Last year, The Real Housewife of Atlanta.

Phadra? Yes.

Oh, my God. That just was really freaking me out. I thought it was having dementia.

I heard that she's the best.

No, they should take the clips of her at the roundtable and play them at law school.

Why Was she good?

Well, she is a lawyer. She is just- Gary, take notes. She was so... She ate them all up. And she was a traitor.

She ate them all up. This is what's fucked up because people start... They call about there's double, triple bluffing where first they're like, Are they pretending to not be a traitor? Then it's like, Are they pretending to not be a traitor, to be a traitor, to not be a traitor? It's so many layers in mind fuckery. I feel like you'd be amazing at it if there wasn't physical stuff involved. I feel like I would nervous giggle the whole time, and people would be like, She's got to go. If she giggles again- People would fucking hate us at the roundtable because all we would do would be like, Oh, you're a good one. That's what you're saying. You know what's funny? People take it so seriously. People are cursing each other out. I'm like, They're not talking about you. It's a game of if you're a traitor, and people are like, Fuck you and fuck this. I'm like, What are we fighting? They're not saying you're evil. They're saying, Did Alan Cummings tap you on the shoulder or not? By the way, his outfits are spectacular because I love that he doesn't even acknowledge it. He just walks in the room, he walks out.

He should win an Emmy, literally, just for his outfits.

He's incredible. The traitors. The traitors. The traitors. The traitors.

The traitors. Well, I love that you're watching.

Yeah, but I'm starting to fast forward through the activities because I'm like, I just want to see them at the table. So that's fun for me. That's fun for me. We're having some fun with that. Did you watch Him and Her? Him and Her? Of course. Should I watch it?

Yeah. One of the best shows I've actually probably... One of the best shows I've watched in In three years, I would say.

What?

Well, in terms of it's one season, you're not getting another season. It's like a mini-series. It's phenomenal.

I do love a mini-series. I love a bow at the end. I also love both those actors.

Wait, I love the guy in that. He's the guy from Wolf of Wall Street. He just gives me- Is he the Italian with the strong nose?

Yeah. Yeah, you love that shit. I love that shit, too.

I love that shit. Yeah, we love that shit. Yeah, I love him.

Wait, can I say a crazy hot take?

Yeah.

It's not juicy or anything. It's just diabolical. Depending on the scenario, sometimes I like when people play music on the subway on speakerphone because sometimes it brings an ambiance that is needed.

Sometimes it's like you have your own soundtrack through the world.

Yes. Sometimes you're having a bad day and someone puts on and you go, You know what? I'm feeling this.

That's how I feel when I walk down the sidewalk and there's a delivery guy on a bike with his own boombox. And I'm like, Yeah, create your own joy.

Playing blasting music on a subway seems insane until you need to pick me up and jaw rule comes on.

Honestly, that's the least weird thing that happens.

It's literally just adding some ambiance to the- Down there is weird.

It can get weird down there.

Wait, so you agree?

Yeah, I don't mind. I don't mind. The subway is lawless. There's no rules on the subway. So someone playing their music on speaker... It's not airport rules. It's not plane rules. So someone playing on speaker, at least of my worries, because my head's on a swivel for way worse things.

By the way, I'm going rogue with what I'm watching because I'm watching Raleigh TV, and then I'm watching Fallout.

You know what I don't even know what that is.

Okay, so Dez is one of these shows he just started and was like, You're not going to like it. So maybe he actually reverse mind fucked me because he was like, You wouldn't like this. You wouldn't like this. I'm like, Actually, maybe I will.

See, whenever anyone ever says that to me. I'm like, Okay.

The way he did it, though, he's like, You know what I'm talking about? But like, Walt and Gaugin's in it. It's about an Apocalypse, and I love apocalyptic stuff because that's what we're currently living in. Yeah, you do. Yeah, because I want to be prepared for the future.

No, it scares me.

I want to be prepared for the future. Sorry.

Also, I'm just not going to ever be that dusty. Would you try and live through an Apocalypse?

No. Yeah, me neither. Well, also because my husband, he's having problems with his knee, so he wouldn't be able to defend me. No.

I'm taking myself out. Have at it. Good luck, guys. See you up there.

But no. It's based off a video game, so it's the last of us. The acne is really good. It's funny. Honestly, if any girls are apocalyptic stuff, I think I'm into it.

Okay, well, that seems very Hannah-coated, but we're happy for you.

Also, we went in to... I'm staying at this hotel, and they told us that it's really old and beautiful, great history, and there may not be ghosts. I immediately Ali gets upset. She's like, Please don't tell me that. And I said, Please tell us more. I love a roommate. And Ali's literally getting nervous. I look at her, I'm like, You're no fucking fun. All you have to do is give the ghost good energy and go have a good time. You're putting out bad vibes, then they'll... Then she's like, Just don't bring up. It makes me really upset. So obviously, when I knocked on her door, I was like, Oh. But honestly, life is If you were so boring, I'd love a ghost. I'd love a ghost. Also, what are you going to do? Take me out? I dare you. I hope you do. If that's how I go, that's iconic.

See, okay, you know what's crazy is there's definitely ghosts in my apartment building because my apartment building is so old. Someone has definitely died in my exact unit before.

Well, someone told you that.

No, they didn't, but...

You heard or you felt it?

Well, no, it's just so old. My building was built in like, is a pre-war building. So it's like... Which war? Someone's deaf. Who knows? You know? Thank you so much for bringing that up. No one talks about that.

No one talks about that. Is it the war currently going on in my mind?

War of 1812? Where are we getting at here? No. In New York City, if you live here for even a second, you will hear the phrase pre-war. It's pre-war. I love saying it.

Men love saying that.

Oh, my God. I used to be like, very anti-pre-war buildings because I'm like, Eew, dirty, gross.

It's old, yeah.

Like vintage clothing. Now I'm chic character.

Yes.

I don't want your new modern bullshit. I want something with a little gusto, something with a border.

Something with- Yeah, I want to hear a little kid singing at night. Yes.

I want her in a nightgown that goes to the floor. She's yelling, Mom. I think that's your 30s.

She's yelling, Mom. Your 20s, you're scared of ghosts. In your 30s, you're like, I need some entertainment. I'm so sick of myself and everyone around me.

I'd love some companionship.

Hold me at night, please.

I do feel like if I were to- You know something's warm. If we were to get a ghost, we would get cool ghosts that are like, sleepy.

No, for sure. They'd be like, We've heard the gossip, and we want to tell you... I've never said this out loud. This is so weird, but have you ever been in a room alone and smelled a fart, and you didn't fart?

Yes. Yes.

Are you serious? I've never said this out loud. I thought it was just me being insane, farting and not knowing I farted. And it's not even my brand. I'm like, What the fuck? Do you think Ghost Fart?

Yes. Because wait, I've heard that if there's a ghost or something, you'll feel like a really... You'll walk and it'll be really warm air and you're like, what the heat's not on. Or really cold. Like you're in a pool when someone pees. Yes. And there have been times where I've been in my apartment where I've been like, What is that smell? And then I look at Kitty, and she looks at me, and I'm like, Okay, well, it's got to be one of us.

Which brings me to my next point of why I love cats.

They can see ghosts.

And cats don't fart. They're girls. Cats don't fart. Dogs will fart and clear the room. Even if my cat did fart, I would blame it on someone else. But it doesn't Katz don't fart.

No, I've never heard Katz fart. They hold it in. Yeah, she would do it in her privacy. She's put some respect on her name. She has Kuth. Dogs are just out here, like, ripping ass.

You're eating, and everyone's like, What is that in my mouth? They're like, Start my dog.

They look at you like, What? And you're like, Hello?

You can hear it. I've heard a dog fart. Like, diabolical. They show off.

Okay. One of the biggest revelations of my life, I think about this all the time, and I don't know why, is the one time I went dog sleding, I didn't know that... Don't even get me started. It was when I did that goddamn winter house. They made me go dog sleding. One of the things that I didn't realize is when you're sitting in the sled and the dogs are running, they're also shitting the entire time.

I didn't know. Yeah. Does it kick up at you?

Almost. I was like, What is this? They were like, Well, they're exerting so much energy. I was like, So this is animal abuse? No.

First of all, full... Pete is fuming. You're going to get a call. Second of all, is it like your adrenaline goes and you have to... When you're going through a guy's phone and you have to poop.

Honestly, yes. I'm like, So I have to endure their shit? Because no. That's why I don't like that.

Cats wouldn't do that. Cats would never do that.

No. Cats would be like, You want me to pull you on a slide? Okay.

Since we're at the every pod, we get to the customary poop part, I have a poop. I just have to say something which is diabolical, but I'm going to say it because if people have made it to this point in the episode, they get us. There's something that people don't talk about enough, and it's this rare thing that happens, particularly to me, where every now and then you go to dinner and you're not that hungry and you're like, damn it. I want to be hungry for this, but you're not that hungry. You don't know why.

And then after the appetizers- Me, literally, every time I go out to dinner because I have anxiety.

After the appetizers, I realize, I'm going to go to the bathroom. A mid-dinner poop feels like a puking rally when you're partying. Because you thought you were out. You thought that you were out, and you come back a new woman, and you're like, Bring the fucking entree. It's round two, motherfucker. I pooped in the middle of a sushi extravaganza.

Right there on the table.

The way I was shoveling sushi, Des was like, Where did you get this second wind? And I said, You don't even want to know what happened in the bathroom. But it's like you feel like you come back to life. It's pooping during dinner is underrated.

Your commitment to shitting in public is truly-I didn't know you weren't supposed to.

Don't put a toilet there if you don't want to be shitting in it. Why is there a toilet there? Also, I don't I feel like that men can shit and we can't shit. Actually, a lot of men don't shit in public. The first thing I do when I go to a public place is I'm like, Where can I poop?

Yeah, no, you're like a dog where you have to pee on things. Like, That's mine. That's mine. You're like, Good facilities here. I'll take a shit.

Strong flush.

What a diabolical episode this has been so far.

Oh, God. Well, I want to thank Duncan for partnering with us for the episode. These refreshers are so, so good.

We've gone on literally eight rants.

Which one did you get?

Strawberry dragon fruit with a little sparkling water.

Mango pineapple refresher with green tea, as you guys know, I always do. We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us. Yeah, I'm going to be in LA on Thursday. Come to the show in LA. Also, San Francisco.

Okay. Also, I have one housekeeping thing. I have my Amazon Live. Not this This week is a solo episode, but my one next week that I will be announcing is the one that I had to take a beta blocker for. Because everyone was like, Was it for Morgan Stewart? And I was like, No, I freaking love Morgan. Was it for Brooks? No, we had so much fun. This one, this is the one I had to take a beta blocker.

I think I took a beta blocker when you told me about it. Yeah. Very exciting. We love you guys so much, and we'll giggle with you on Friday. Bye.