Transcript of Giggling about group chats, social media, and cortisol spikes

Sup, gigglers?

Carrie, fix your Wi-Fi.

Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me.

If you're watching, first, take a breather. Welcome.

First of all, I'm wearing the same outfit as you.

I was on FaceTime with Hannah. She saw me get dressed.

See, this is where there's two sides to every story. Yes, I technically saw you, but I wasn't processing. I was looking at myself in FaceTime, right? I wasn't like, oh, she's wearing a white shirt. I— that's like a great idea.

And glasses and black pants. Or what are you wearing on your feet? And that's why we're different.

My, my comfortable sandals.

Um, okay, look, obviously we're alive. Like, we see the internet, we see it, we know what's going on. And this is Giggly Squad, which is funny because we have to laugh through. If you don't laugh, you'll cry.

Yes, yes.

Um, So we will say, obviously Sierra is our real friend in real life. So we have been talking to her, consoling her. We are behind her 100%. We would never capitalize or monetize off of our friend's heartbreak.

We love you Sierra as the one and only guest that's ever been on Giggly Squad who's a woman besides a couple cat psychics.

And sorry Trevor Wallace. Trevor Wallace. We kind of just erase you from history. We're like, we've never had a guest except one time a redheaded man came in and the girls rioted. Anyway, I digress.

Digress.

But he— the last—

and this is the last thing I'm gonna say about it throughout the whole pod. And this is the final—

and this is the final thing I'm gonna say about it, because Sierra is a strong, intelligent, capable woman. She will speak her truth when it is her time. I would never speak for her. And also, this is reality TV. Like, there is very concrete reasons on why Hannah and I are no longer a part of reality TV. It's one of the scariest things you can ever do in your entire life, um, and it's partly why we created Giggly Squad.

So yeah, I think this is an example of how, like, what actually is going on in people's lives is far crazier than anything they ever show.

Yeah.

And I think Giggly Squad was created after us seeing how they wanted to pick fights and how they wanted to pick people, and we felt like so much was on the cutting room floor, and they weren't showing the things that they should show. They wouldn't show. And Giggly Squad is where we could just be ourselves and laugh. And I do have to just shout out Sierra, that, um, I was supposed to be beefing with her from the second I met her. Like, we should have— we should have never had a chance. Like, it was immediate. Like, you two need to fight over a man. And the second I met her, I looked her in the eye and we were like, I love you, you love cats, I fuck with you. And she's like a cat ring on, and she's had my back since the day I met her, and I feel the same way towards her. So I love you.

Um, so since I've been trying to be off my phone, I deleted my apps. Oh, I deleted the calculator. Also, I don't run the Daphne DeSorbo account. I need to say that. I just need to say that because I don't run it. I don't know who runs it. Shout out to their Canva game, but it is not me, so please stop tagging me.

Are you sure it's not Daphne though?

And let me just give like one little snippet. Yeah, our group chat is better than yours. It's popping off, okay? I'd be jealous too. Why do you think I'm wearing glasses? I've been in the investigation. People being like, Paige is silent, Paige is silent.

We're like Mary-Kate and Ashley in those trench coats. That's us. You can rewatch that movie if you want to actually see what we've been up to.

And here's one of the things that I also say is like, we really do know the importance of female friendships. And one thing that was happening, like when I was going through a breakup, after all was said and done, I think I called Hannah one day and I was just like, thanks for letting me talk about the same situation for the past 7 months and just like going over it again with me and going over it again with me. So like, we are real friends. So if you think that I haven't gone over the same scenarios so many different times over the past year with my girlfriends, like, you're crazy. Like, it is weird to see things on the internet because you're like, those are my real girlfriends. So yeah, I'm gonna react differently than to the people that are just natural viewers. You don't know them. Like, and I'm no longer on the show, so I'm not—

also, there is like, whenever you post something, it becomes a news article where it's like, that's not what you want, right? You guys donated a shit ton to the food bank. I posted a food bank and everyone, they're all donating. So the New York City Food Bank is very happy for everyone.

Oh my gosh, good for all you little sleuths on my Instagram. This is a good point because a couple of weeks ago I had made, uh, Daphne had made a, a t-shirt for St. Jude for just like a something like in-house that they were doing. We didn't like post about it really because it was like for something they were doing at the hospital. But so many people DM'd about the, the t-shirts. So we are going to put them on the Daphne website and then obviously all the money will go to St. Jude's. But I've become like a partner with St. Jude and I'm going to do more with them throughout the year.

But hi, how are you? Today some stuff went down. Yeah, we were together working as one, as two women do. And stuff starts going down and I'm like, Paige, I just dropped my music video. And you were like, hey babe, not now. You're like, hey, like, you know when a mom's like trying to have a conversation with an adult and someone's like, Mom, Mom, Mom, and she's like, hey Mom, I'm on the phone. I'm speaking. I literally like, she's taking like, press is calling her and she's having to like, and I'm like, Mom, Mom, hey, look what I can do.

You are just wasting my damn time.

I go, look what I can do, look what I can do. And she looks at me and she's like, what are you talking about? And I go, it's my world premiere. And she goes, I thought this was a joke. And I go, it's not. It's a music video that I really produced.

I thought it was a bit.

Okay, well, it's not. And then I go, can you watch it? Now, I do have to say, the pain of watching someone watch something you're forced to watch—

You male YouTube videoed me. You were over my shoulder.

I waterboarded you. But the funniest part about it is, like, you don't realize till someone else is watching something how long it actually is. Because when you're watching it through someone else's eyes, it actually is like dog years. I am so sorry. That was the longest music video I've I mean, if the only one I've ever done, but it was, it was unnecessarily like 40 seconds too long.

Paul Wall is going to call any minute. I mean, it's kind of crazy.

So then like someone else came in the apartment and I was like, hey. And they're like, what's going on? And I go, I just dropped my music video. And Paige was like, Hannah, shut the fuck up.

I was like, stop telling people. Let's get to like, let's get to like why you're actually stressed. No, let's— when I'm on my iPad at night, I know no bounds.

Sometimes I'm like, it's time to take the iPad away.

When you tell me, hey, don't go on socials, I'm still alive and a human, so like, I'm gonna be on my phone. So I'm pulling up Pinterest, I'm on Amazon, I'm shopping, and all of a sudden I get it in my head. Now simultaneously, I'm thinking about how there's a pile of clothes in my closet that I need to hang up and like put away. Just like, I'm thinking like closet mode. I'm getting— I'm like, should I organize something?

Also, if you never need to organize, you can come over to my place too.

If you ever just want to push it. But when you're trying to be off your phone, crazy things happen. I fed the cat, called my grandma. No, literally, I met my brother for the third time.

I learned how to read.

Have you ever heard of a steamer closet?

It's a closet just for steaming yourself or for clothes? Clothes.

I wonder what would happen if you got in it. Probably nothing good. But I've only ever seen one in person at Amazon, like at the Amazon studio. Like they have one in one of the green rooms and you can throw your outfit in there or whatever, and you close the door, and you close the door. It looks— it's basically like a dry cleaner at home. So I'm doing some research, I'm looking them up. $2,000. I think, hmm, it is a little steep, but let me girl math it for a second. How much time would I save steaming my clothes, not bringing things to the dry cleaners, like using this little—

and as a CEO of a business.

And as someone that owns a fashion brand, I should be pressed.

And I do have to say, it's a write-off. I look like an accountant right now, that's why I thought of that.

So I purchased that, and right now it's in my foyer because it's so fucking— yeah, you know, that's like when you order a couch and you're like, no idea. I haven't even— I'm honestly, I'm actually waiting for my dad to come over so that an adult knows how to get it out.

Perfect thing for a dad to do. But I know Gary's gonna be like, what the hell is this?

He's gonna love it. Which brings me to my next point. I'm hosting my first holiday this year, this Sunday. Jesus has risen. I'm hosting Easter, which—

God has died, Jesus has risen, you just made that up. Christ has come again.

Wow.

Sorry, I'm a singer.

Well, and you know what, remix coming soon. I realized not that many people celebrate Easter, I feel like. Um, like, no, like I'm saying, even the people that like, that is their religion.

I think the Italians do.

Yeah, but I feel like some people A lot of people don't make it a big deal. Really?

I feel like, well, growing up for sure there was like Easter egg hunts. Once my Nana made Jell-O Easter eggs and I guess they like went down a little too easy. I had like 14 of them and then I threw up in the car and it was all like green. It was just like green and like I still haven't lived it down. My dad brings it up all the time and it was actually traumatic. I've never had Jell-O since.

You're coming to my Easter and I hope there's Jell-O eggs there.

No, wait, I'm so excited. I'm trying to get Des to dress up up as the Easter Bunny, which we almost did, but we kind of messed it up in our pitch.

Well, I should have said that it was my idea.

Yeah, if you wanted it, he would have done it, but he knows it's just me just messing with him.

I'm not cooking, I'm catering, so like, am I hosting?

Yes, you are.

I mean, there's like about 20 people.

Having people in your space is an emotional exhaustion.

Yeah, like last night I was like, I don't have any ice buckets. No, how am I hosting?

Do you have garbage?

No ice buckets.

Do you have enough garbage bags for when people just like toss their cup around? Or the—

I have enough garbage bags.

Okay, look at me trying to host. That's the one thing I worry about.

People really stress out. I don't know how people do this all the time.

People get mad about garbage.

People get mad about garbage.

I also texted you because Dez was going to be gone all weekend, and then I was like, wait, he's actually going to be around, can he come? And you go, imagine if I said no. No, but he would have been so funny as the bunny because he does like a character arc. And he likes to give it— he would give it his all. I feel like if the suit's there, yeah, I might just Amazon it and be like, oh my God, did you order? I'd be like, Paige must have sent it. We'll see.

We'll see.

Maybe I'll do it.

I feel like that's really what you've been gunning for.

I know, but I want Kim DeSorbo to respect me. Well, wait, I envisioned me and Kim with some wine in the corner talking shit about you. Like, that's what I envisioned.

Hannah texted me today, like, out of nowhere and was like, Kim's waiting for this email. And I was like, who? Like, I literally didn't know what she was talking about. And Hannah was like, your mom, because we were like waiting for an email and she was like, I bet your mom's waiting also.

I hate who I become in these social events because again, I'm gonna be like, oh, like we have to socialize. But I think I'm gonna be excited.

You actually said to me the other day, don't worry, I'm gonna leave before it gets serious. Like, Jesus is actually gonna rise in my apartment. I'm like, what? At what part is it getting serious? Take me with you. I don't want to stay when it's— when's it serious? You're like, don't worry, I'm gonna scoot out right before. I'm like, before what?

Before Christ rises. Yeah. Is there anything that I should know about it before, like, to prep? Is there a—

what are you gonna wear?

Pastels, right? It is, um, there's a theme.

It is business casual. No, I just— it's Easter brunch.

Yeah, it's Easter brunch.

Like, I'm gonna be in this yellow Gucci dress that I saw Kate Blanchett— Jessica Chastain.

Got it.

I saw her wear it on the COVID of a magazine and I was like, that dress needs to be mine. And so I'm gonna wear that for Easter.

What's Kim wearing?

You know, I don't know.

Speak your moms. Lenore cut a bob.

And how is that? Is she different?

She's gorgeous. Well, she's sending me a lot of selfies. She's loving it.

I saw the cut that we posted on Giggly Squad account.

What do you think?

Gorgeous. I love it.

Not for you?

It is for me. Yeah, you're not ready.

You're not ready. I think—

here's what I think. In like a couple years, she's post-wedding, chasing children around. She's pre-children.

Oh, pre-children.

She's post-wedding but she's pre-children, somewhere in there.

I feel like if you're nervous about getting an ugly haircut, do it when you're pregnant. My mom shaved her head when she was pregnant. It was iconic.

Yeah, but she was in New York City in 1991, in the middle of the summer. August.

Yeah, she was. Yeah, she was 8 months in the summer. So in terms of what I'm going to wear, Des, I know, will look cute. He's good at like the preppy look. Me, I don't want to wear something that upsets anyone.

Okay.

I don't want to take the attention away from Christ, our Lord and Savior.

Right.

Because it's not about me on Easter. I'm not the main character.

Yeah. And do you want me to make you an Easter basket?

Yes. Do you have a chocolate, um, bunny?

Damn it, I don't have a chocolate bunny.

That's what I forgot.

I've been ordering stuff on Amazon.

Let me bring it because I need to bring a gift.

I need to bring a gift because I was like, oh my God, my mom's gonna come and be like, what is this tablescape? So I need to like impress my mom with my tablescaping.

Oh my God, I'm so nervous for you.

It's so stressful.

No.

And let me tell you something, there's not a lot of Easter stuff out there for boys. Like, try doing an Easter basket for a little boy. It's really hard.

Just get them dirt.

So anyway, a couple rocks. So that's what I've been doing while I've been staying off my phone. I've been ordering steamer closets and looking at how to fold a napkin into bunny ears. And so we're really thriving.

You know who's not thriving? Yeah, Tiger Woods and Justin Timberlake.

Like, this is either I'm in a different timeline and this is a Mandela effect, or I've seen this news article.

Did you just bring up Mandela effect? Yeah, you've never done that in Giggly Squad.

You're never on TikTok and you're like— and people are like, what timeline are you in? If you remember this, then you're on this timeline.

You smoke weed.

Thank God, thank God.

No, I don't have any vice.

No, thank God.

You're my vice. And you're like, can you please stop FaceTiming me?

Well, because now Sometimes you FaceTime me and I feel like your mom. I'm like, are you okay? First, tell me what's going on.

What did you do?

Like, you know, when your mom has that voice, like, you answer the phone, she like immediately knows, like, either something's going on with you that you're sad, or like you did something.

You're like, what is in your mouth?

What happened? Yeah, it's—

give me, give me what's in your mouth. Let it out.

That is like how I feel like I have to talk to you sometimes. I'm like, what did you do? What did you do?

Because we're casually texting, DMing, um, all day. Smoke. Yeah, smoke signal all day. So then when I do the FaceTime, it's always something.

Well, first of all, my invisible ink texts have gone rampant, but I still don't know how to send it. People don't talk about— if you're talking to a friend, like, what your usual medium is to talk, and then they FaceTime you, you're like, oh, this is serious.

But also, I don't do it for work. Like, I've never FaceTimed you over work stuff.

Yeah, or like a group text.

I think that's Grace. Like, when's the last time? That goes through Grace.

I think you Snapchatted me a couple months ago. It's actually crazy in the year 2026. Like, okay, we could say that we've been addicted to our phones for how many years?

Sorry, I was on my phone. What'd you say?

Like, when do you think your addiction really started? 10 years ago?

I wasn't addicted in college. I know that because my BlackBerry broke and I was like, who cares? Like, I literally was like, whatever. And I got addicted. I will— I remember in like 2015 seeing that like people started to make crazy money. That's when I started my Forks and Fitness account.

Oh right, we can't forget.

And I knew that you can use social media to like build businesses. And then when I started working— when I started working for Betches in like 2017, I was private. Like I, I just wanted to be a video producer.

Oh no way.

Yeah, so when I was working for them, I had like no followers and I was just creating on their stuff.

Yeah.

And then I started like writing jokes.

So I feel like I've had like a full— I would say yeah, probably around the same time, like 20, whenever I start like graduated college and then started like working.

So like 2015, 2016, the world went bad. There's this new thing called dumb phones, which is fun, where it's basically like flip phones that people can use. People are trying to solve it. They're like, can I have a phone with no social media? But then it's like, if you have access to the internet, then you have social— like, no one's gotten the right way. Or if phones that are just text and calling, but then it's like you need GPS, you might need your email.

I kind of feel like we should do it like once a month for a week, like legitimately not go on any social media except for like Pinterest.

When like things are in a certain situation, I just get off my phone for 2 weeks. Yeah, I highly recommend it. If it's literally like getting off a drug where like The first 4 hours are difficult. You're like grabbing the phone, you're going for it, and then—

well, it's just like a habit, like a sensation, like a fixation, oral fixation.

It's like wanting to get a cigarette but you can't.

Yes.

And then you get past that a little bit, and then you realize, I'm gonna have a husband.

Yeah.

And you start talking to him, and then you think— start thinking of plans. You're like, maybe I should call someone. Like, literally what you were saying, maybe I should do something fun.

Like, I was like, what other hobbies can I do?

Because Also, the algorithm, I don't care how well you curate it, you're always going to see something that like, as sensitive girls.

Yeah.

It makes you feel something you shouldn't feel in that moment, right? Whether it's like grief or something or anger, it's like, can we just keep the cortisol levels?

I'm not cortisol spiking.

Can you tell them the story?

Okay. You know that like crazy guy that does like the looks maxing and he's like 20 years old and he like takes meth?

Glamazon or something?

No, like literally.

He was like, it's gay to like be attracted to women. So he said also he's like not good looking still.

His name is a little twerp. I want to say clavicle. It's not, it's not clavicle, but it's like that. Clavicular.

Clavicular. Okay.

Which I don't even know.

Whatever.

He got arrested. What did he get arrested for? He got arrested for like basically what is it called when you like incite violence? Like he made these two girls like basically fight, I think. So I think he did get arrested and like possibly going to jail. But I don't even— I just like saw that clip, but I saw a video and he's like a streamer, which I still—

I don't understand.

I don't know what a streamer is. I do not get it. Like, I don't understand.

I know that men watch other men play video games sometimes, which I think is whatever, you know, whatever gets you through the day.

Put the guns away and watch whatever you watch.

Someone play Super Mario Kart.

I still don't understand what streamer is and where you watch streamers. Like, I don't get what it— I don't get it.

I think it's on Yahoo, but whatever.

He's like streaming and he's like fighting with some girl. I don't know if it's his girlfriend or not, but he says to her, I'm not cortisol spiking. And right when I heard it, I was like, that's my new brain rot.

Next time I FaceTime you, can you answer like that?

I'm not cortisol spiking right now, so I don't know what you have to say to me, but I refuse to do it. I don't want Here's one thing I— another thing I will say. I had a woman who I like work with reach out to me the other day and say—

how dare she, a woman who knows me.

I said, oh my God, what do you want from me? No, because I believe just because you can contact me doesn't mean I have to contact you back, and I fully implement that. But she reached out to me and she was like, I just want to let you know I listened to Giggly Squad and I was deciding between like going to a new job and like and I heard you say how much you like bet on yourself when you guys were on tour and like the different decisions that you had to make. And I just want to let you know, I ended up deciding to like go on a new path and like take a new job and like bet on myself. And I was like, oh, I forget people listen to us. I go, oh, that—

no, that was really inspirational.

I felt like that was so nice.

And also, we don't want everyone to quit their jobs. It's just like, if you're already our teacher—

no, no, it wasn't that. It was like, if you have a big decision, whether it's like job or relationship or anything, and you're like, what should I do? Like, I, I just always think like the universe will reward you not for picking the harder thing, but picking the thing that's most you, even if it's scary.

You guys, the universe does reward you. And sometimes if you're in pain, you're going through something hard, that means something good's happening after.

And I was very much in a situation where I was like, I knew I didn't want to stay on reality TV for so many reasons, but I was also so scared to not be on it.

But I was just like, also, as I said before, 75% of statistics are wrong, but 44% of women are in the workforce to men, and only like around 33% have leadership roles. And that's why a lot of women are starting their own companies, because the patriarchy is still alive and well in the workforce. And sometimes you're like, I cannot watch these guys who are mediocre keep getting promoted, um, ahead of me, and I'm just gonna do my own shit because I'm, I'm sick of being taken advantage of. So go into corporate, learn everything you have to learn, and we support you.

You know, another reason that I bet that older men are like starting to date like even younger women today is because women are like making more money than them, and so they can really only go after like 25-year-olds.

It does remind me of all those TikToks of girls who were like, corporate's so funny because I walk in and I'm just like working with someone's dad. I'm like, Edward, Edward, did you forward the chart?

Wait, I forget. That like there are people's dads that I like have on emails with that I'm like, do better.

Um, I have a current vocal stim.

Yes.

Have you seen the Kendall Toole video of Peloton where she's like, get him banned?

Yeah.

Oh, get him banned. We don't do that here. We don't tolerate that disrespect. Oh, get him banned.

I knew you would love that one. I can't stop See, I have to scroll. I can't stop talking too much because I immediately feel like I'm in— did you ever go through that New York City, like, SoulCycle?

Just—

it was SoulCycle, Flywheel, and then what was the other one? There was another one. No, I feel like there was like another one that was like trendy that like went out of business.

This is my thing. I've been so physically and mentally abused during, yeah, collegiate athletics that like I never wanted to be yelled at by someone. Also, I, I don't have no rhythm, but like when you go to a SoulCycle class and you see the girls in the front with their like bouncy shit, I was like, that's an art form that like I'm not even going to try to tackle. That looks like it would take years.

I went to like 3 flywheel classes because like the guy I was dating at the time was like, you should go, you would like it. I was like, I love it.

I love all the different versions of Paige in your 20s.

She was a one-woman show, okay?

She was versatile.

Sorry that I had range, okay? You could plop me anywhere with anyone and I could talk to them and I had a great time.

I do have some single friends though that like they're doing their range, like they're deciding like, oh, I'm gonna date like a crocodile hunter or like whatever. But some of them are Because I'm married and bored. Yeah, I'm like, I trust her and like she's living life and she's bringing the stories. Like, you need a friend in your group who's like in that time of her life.

Well, I'm just like such a big proponent of— and I felt it and I never felt bad about saying it, and I feel like I had like boyfriends be like, it's a really mean thing to say. Like, I knew when I would break up with whoever, I wasn't done going out, and I'd be Sorry, I'm not done being for the streets. Like, I'm not done going out.

I'm trying on different shoes.

Yeah, like, I don't want you to ask me like where I am every single night and keep tabs on me. Like, I—

when a shoe doesn't fit, you keep, you keep going through the aisle.

When I was like 27, 28, if you had proposed to me and I, and I had gotten married—

you're talking about me?

No, just saying like in the ethos, I would have, I would have been divorced. Yeah, like in no situation would I— because I would have seen other girls out and I would have been like, take me with you. Okay, now that all the non-gigglers are gone, we'll tell you the real thing.

Because you knew they were in there.

You knew they were in there.

They lasted about 25 minutes. They're like, this is stupid, they're not saying anything. Okay, this is what's going on.

Do you have anything else on your docket?

Well, worse news, pickleball has been added to the Olympics for 2028.

Wait, was the Kit Kat thing fake or real? Was it an April Fool's joke, Hannah?

Oh my God, don't point at me.

Sorry, I don't know. How pissed are you about pickleball though? Look, do you feel like it's coming for your art?

I support women in the arts.

Totally.

I personally haven't played it because I'm afraid I'll get addicted and then the tennis community will be mad at me. Okay, it's just interesting. It's just— I don't have any— honestly, I don't have an opinion.

Difference between pickleball and padel?

Paddle's more respected. It's European.

Got it. It's something. Olympics?

Great question. It should be. It's really— I— all the tennis players—

so pickleball is going to be in the next Summer Olympics?

Yeah, but like they've had breakdancing. Like it's not even like a big— like you could have anything in the Olympics if they have like a good marketing team.

Really?

Yeah, you could have fucking kitten heel walking. Which I'm not gonna make the team.

That's a great saying, kitten heel walking. Sorry, I'm doing my kitten heel walk because people know I would assume it's like you have to go through a committee, you have to like present why your sport should be in the Olympics. What, like, I would think that there's like, yeah, you have to like give the head of a pig to the person who invented the Olympics. Like, I don't know, I'm thinking there's like a whole rigmarole situation.

Drag should be in the Olympics.

100%.

I think lip sync drag should be in the Olympics. Let's go, Rue!

Now we're talking.

Put it on the docket. Put it on the docket.

No, but the breakdancing thing was— we don't talk about it, and we, we skipped, we moved on so quickly.

I mean, I made my whole identity for like 6 months.

Like, really, when you break it down, someone like broke into the Olympics. It was the highest.

Break it down, no pun intended.

And she couldn't, she could not break it down. That was crazy.

Every now and then I check her Instagram.

And what is she doing?

I don't know. I think she was kind of—

you really connected with her.

Yeah, I think she's still fighting the good fight. She's like, people misunderstood me. She was like, you don't, you don't understand, I got a bad edit. People are really mad at Talenti for— I love how worked up you just got because they came for your Italian heritage.

Well, what are they mad at them for?

It's like impossible to open up a Talenti.

Oh wow, now you have my— now you have my ears.

So like the way it is, a cool— what's it called—

container pint.

Yeah, it's a cool container pint, but like to open it, like when it's in the freezer, it gets like impossible. So there's always videos of people taking like nail guns and like knives and yeah, and doing all these crazy things to open it. But then part of me is like, maybe I think it's good because, you know, no one ever needs ice cream. No, but no one's ever been like, if I don't get this ice cream right now, I'm gonna die.

We have a lot of pregnant listeners, so stand 10 toes down on that. And I've never been pregnant, and I— there have been times where I'm like, if I don't get the pistachio, not the mint— I know they're both green, use your eyes— like, if you've ever tried to order— no, I'm actually getting pissed. If you've ever tried to order a pint of ice cream on Instacart or like Uber Eats or whatever your medium and you get a man and he just gets— because it's green, I'm like, if you get mint, if you get me mint, I will riot. Mint is disgusting. Mint with chocolate is so vile to me.

Yeah, yeah. I like mint tea though. No, but what I'm saying is there are those moments where like I could see you like trying to open the Talenti and be like, I like put it under hot water. I'd be like, do I— wait, do I actually need this right now, or is this just an impulse? Is it 3 AM? Yeah, I'm also a savory girl. Like, you are?

You're not like a cheeseburger?

I want— yeah, penne alla vodka.

Like, I'll wake up in the morning and be like, it's a great day to have cheesecake later.

Des told me that he used to wake up at like 6 AM and go to his freezer and eat like a layer of the ice cream, but so his parents couldn't tell, so he would like delicately eat a thin layer of it and do it every day.

One time when I was little, I stole like a thing of frosting and I just like kept it in my bedroom because like frosting doesn't go bad. And one day my mom was like, why do you have this? And I was like, I don't know.

Frosting. Frosting. I guess it doesn't go bad.

It doesn't.

I had a friend whose mom like never let her have candy. So I went in her bed one day and she was like, look at this. And under her bed she had like tons of candy. And I was like, just come to my house. My mom lets us have candy whenever we want.

Yeah, I was saying we were like, well, I don't know if we knew Italian households, they love a cup of chocolate when you walk in. Yeah, like Ferrero Rocher.

You don't like Ferrero Rocher?

Thinking about hosting, like, now I get why my mom was so crazy when we were younger. Like, I could sit in the living room and hear like, oh, someone's coming over, and she'd be like, we don't have a cake!

Where's the 7-layer dip? Like, what do we have?

And my parents keep a frozen cheesecake in the freezer in the garage in case someone comes over.

What's it called? She's like, bring out the fondue, the fondue mountain.

She's like, I have nothing to serve them.

I think you're gonna be the hostess with the mostest.

No, I'm very excited. I'll definitely put some pics in the newsletter because I'm really working on my tablescape, and I hope that my mom is proud of me.

I know. And I've seen all the packages coming in.

And like, it's early, like my brunch starts at 10.

Do you want my help, or do you think I'm gonna be actually distracting? Yeah, just see, that's what I try to tell people when they— that's what I try to tell people. They're like, why don't you help? And I go, because I would have made it worse.

You'll see my mom and you'll be like, we haven't talked, let's get into it.

Kimberly. Oh, Kimberly, I'm so excited to see her.

I just can't believe we You watch me get dressed on FaceTime.

Who wore it better? The funniest thing is we both have perfect vision. This is insane of us.

Wait, now I feel stupid. Now I feel dumb.

Hey, now I really feel dumb. That's what I was gonna say for the, um, we don't do that here. Yeah, bam, we don't do that here. I want to say when other people make fun of Paige not being able to read, like, that'll piss me off. I'm like, okay, she's actually really— like, you know how many times I've done like I'm like, actually, she's actually really fucking smart. Actually, she's fucking— she's smarter than me. She's a genius. And everyone's like, but you make fun of her saying she can't read every single episode. I go, because she's a genius.

Get in on the joke. Like, we're being sarcastic.

Do you ever get a phone call in the morning and you have to answer, but you try to pretend like you're not asleep? All the time. Like you didn't just wake up? What's your— what's your strategy?

Red leather, yellow leather, red leather, yellow leather.

All the time people are like, you just wake up? Yeah. And I go, no, I'm sick.

Oh, that's a good one. Sometimes I'll give like, oh, Kitty like was up all night. Like, you know, Kitty looks over like, the fuck I was? You know I've been sleeping for 20 hours.

I've been like, sorry, I've been just writing.

No, but you— but we are creatives.

Yes.

So we do stay up a little bit later because we don't have a traditional boss, as they say.

Not to call you out, you were quite productive this morning though, over text.

Well, I was mad about something.

Oh, like I literally separately texted Grace and was like, his page, like, okay.

And she's like, if you piss me off, I'll be at the gym at 8 AM. When I'm mad, things are getting done. Oh, I'm turning into my mom. Oh my God, wait, I actually just had a moment. I'm gonna start crying because I'm like, actually, but like, you know, when you're younger and like your mom's pissed off about something and you're like, fuck, like she could pick up anything, like there's anything could happen and she's gonna go off. Whenever my mom would get mad, I feel like she would like come in my room and like, and this, and this is just all over the place. And you're like, okay, like that's— it's been all over the place. But that's me. Like if something pisses me off and I can't like take it out on that, that's really bad. I should talk about it in therapy. Look at it.

Look at us realizing things. All right, that was really healthy.

Yeah, because I'll wake up and be like And guess what else isn't working? The TV. So figure it out. Like, anything could set me off.

Yeah, that's like when you're pouring your coffee and like a little milk spills and your day's been going bad already and you're like, can I get a day? Um, speaking of woman of STEM of the week, oh my God, um, her name is @emoneyonthetrack. Shout out, she follows me. That was pretty cool. Um, she— why do I feel like a DJ? Shout out, like, Staten Island E-Money on the track. Shout out. Um, she's doing— do you know what a crow pose is? Okay, if you're a yogi, a crow pose is a hard crow, hard pose.

Okay.

And she's doing a side crow pose, which you can only imagine.

I actually can't because I have no idea.

It's so hard.

I can go with you, like, usually I can follow you, but This one, I do like a side crow pose.

Okay. And then her head is like floating. Okay. And then she's sipping Aperol Spritz.

Okay.

And I think that earned Woman of STEM of the Week.

Okay.

Because like you're doing yoga and you're getting drunk. Are girls still drinking Aperol Spritz? Like, do you think that's still a thing? Or is it just—

Yes.

That's the difference between me and you.

What do you mean?

Don't play innocent.

I don't like Aperol Spritz.

Okay, because I was gonna say esthetic girls love Aperol Spritz because of the flat lay, because the color is so nice.

I think it tastes like Robitussin.

It does, but it looks so hydrating. It looks like Gatorade Zero.

And I try it every summer.

I'm like, maybe this is the summer that like I love Aperol Spritzes. Yeah, I want to be a girl who likes Aperol Spritz, but here we are.

No, I want to be a girl that can like get drunk and not Get hungover? No, I— it's not even that. I would take the hungover. I don't even get to the point of like being drunk and having fun. Yeah, like I'm already like, I'm like, sorry, I have to go, I have to throw up. Like, I can't do this.

Shout out to another girl who got Women of STEM of the Week. What's it called when you didn't win but you got runner-up? Yeah, she got runner-up. She posted a video. Her name's MG. She's like, when you're about to get proposed to but you don't know and you're not getting out of the pool. And it's her friend filming her where like, you know, when you get in the pool pool and you're like, this is what I'm doing for the next 8 hours. And she's like doing mermaids, she's doing handstands, she's having a day, she's having a day, she's flopping around, and everyone's like, when is she gonna get out of the pool? Like, he's trying to propose to her. And I feel like that is girlhood, and that makes me so happy because like, you— that's so me. If I'm like asleep and like Des woke me up to propose to me, I was like, can I get like an hour more sleep? Yeah, and then we could do this.

If and when I get engaged, I feel like it's gonna be really hard to surprise me.

Even if you did it successfully, you still would smell it off him.

100%. And here's the other thing. I'm asking my mom and my mom's telling me.

Yeah.

Like, if I have a vibe and I say, Mom, do you know anything about this? She's telling me.

Can I also say something controversial?

Yeah.

If your guy does surprise you.

Yeah.

That means he's a liar and a cheater. Like, if he's that good at hiding something from you, I don't want to marry you. Well, I want it clunky.

I do think it's a red flag if you're getting engaged to someone and no one knows. Like, he's doing it and he hasn't told any of your friends. He hasn't told any of your friends. He hasn't asked your dad. I mean, not everyone does the like ask your dad thing, but did Des do the ask your dad thing?

Well, that was actually a really funny story. I was in the bathroom, as I always am, yeah, with the door open. It's right next to the garage, and Des was in the garage with my dad, and they're speaking very loud, and of course I can overhear them. And he basically was like, hey, can I like marry—

oh my God, you never told me that! So you heard him ask?

I've literally heard it, and my heart sank. I was like, this is so annoying. And then of course my dad goes, yeah, she's your problem now, making a joke. Yeah, they're laughing, and I'm like, what the fuck? And then my dad walks in, tells my mom. So even if I hadn't heard that, I then hear him telling my mom, like, my My New York family's so fucking loud. Oh my God. No one can keep a secret. Then I get out of the bathroom, I'm like, hey, I heard everything.

So how quickly from then to when he did it?

Maybe like 1 or 2 months. But a funny thing that happened is we were in West Hampton and he kept being like, I need to go to the city. And I felt like it was for a reason, for the thing. And we had to go to the city and we were fostering like really shy pit bulls, like pit bulls that needed help. And he opens the door to go to the city and this pit bull runs out, like, after him. Yeah. And but we basically are like chasing a huge pit bull around West Ham.

It's my nightmare.

And it ends up taking like 2 hours. And Dez is like normally pretty calm in these situations. And he, he's— I could tell he's like freaking out. And I'm like, we're going to get the dog. It's fine. Like, there's nowhere for the dog to go. Like, we're on an island. Yeah, we're going to— and we get the dog. And I find out later he had an appointment to get the ring, so he was like freaking out, and I'm here just laughing because the dog— like, we just tried to get the dog and it keeps running away from us, and I think it's so funny. And he's like, not the time.

I really think my dad's gonna be like, no.

Uh, my dad was like, are you ready to get a Twitch?

Yeah, I think my dad's gonna be like, uh, let me ask my wife and we'll get— we'll let you know. I know for a fact that he's gonna be like, yeah, I don't like this. Nervous at all.

Like, what'd you say?

You know what, I don't think he's been nervous for it because anyone I date, my dad's like, she's just playing, like, she's just having fun. Like, he doesn't take anything.

Anyone you dated in the past hasn't had like a moment to even like talk to your dad like that? He's, he's watching the news in the other room.

My dad's not making— he's not available.

Also, they have to go through me first. Yeah, there's like a lot of steps before you get to your dad.

Totally. How did we even—

you have to fight me first. You have to get a physical altercation.

I wish I could bring something up from like TikTok or like anything that I saw this week, but I didn't know what happened.

I deleted all my apps. Yeah, but then I messaged our Gen Alpha Z correspondent, my cousin Andrea, and I said, hey, what's going on on TikTok? She gets me on a voice note with her friend and they're trying to explain to me me about Olivia Rodrigo.

She came out with a new album.

Yeah, but how she was in the same party as Taylor Swift when they famously have beef. But it was at the same party, Paul McCartney's party. And you know who's also there? John Mayer, who Taylor Swift has wrote a lot of stuff about. And they were— so that was from Andrea. I was like, what do I say to the gigglers? And they left me like a long thing. So thank you, Andrea, for tea, but she doesn't know what it means. Um, at the end of the day, Paul McCartney is like an icon. I think they all wanted— what kind of party? I think it was like a listening party. I don't know what, what people do at parties.

I don't know.

The fact that people in Hollywood who are so rich and famous still want to go to parties, I'm like, when does it end?

Well, you know, that's actually something that's very interesting because I feel like the like socializing scene in LA, New York, and Miami is is so completely different. I don't like any of it. I'm probably not going to any of them. So they're similar, but like New York is so like, you must go to dinner. Like, what, you're famished? You haven't eaten? I don't know why they're all of a sudden British. And then it's like out, and then it's someone's apartment, where like LA, I feel like they skip crazy house parties. You go to someone's house in the middle of nowhere where there's no cell phone service, and everyone's like, what do you do?

Who are you represented by? Who do you know here?

I've only gone to like a couple parties in LA before. One, I did almost get abducted.

Yeah.

Slash murdered.

Another one, me and you spoke to nobody and we're just in the corner.

What one was that one?

The dark one. It's like a bar.

Yes, we got french fries. Anyway, I digress.

Okay, now that all the non-gigglers are like for sure gone because they thought they were before, but now they are. I just want to let you guys know Hannah's never told a lie.

Name one time that Hannah's lied.

I do have to say, I want us to like actually learn from the situation. Yeah, as a whole. When you feel wronged by someone or things didn't go well, do not try to get revenge. Do not try to hurt them. Do not think about them in negative ways. Yeah, literally say thank you. And focus on yourself. Because the more you attach to the old energy— what they put at you, they're putting in other people, they're putting towards themselves. Yeah. Remove yourself from the situation and their stuff is going to be handled.

Yeah.

Leave that to God. Leave that to whatever you believe in.

Yeah.

Focus on yourself. Keep your hands clean. Go to sleep at peace.

Yeah.

And I focus on myself and I try to stay out of drama. Occasionally drama comes to me and I hear about it.

It finds us.

It finds us. And that's— yeah, women in the arts.

Unless you're a man, then I'm coming for you. Don't rest. If you've ever dated me, don't rest. That speech was for girls. Don't rest. Okay, that's all that we have.

We love you so much. Thanks for giggling. Bye!