Transcript of "Emma Thompson"

So hello everyone, um, darling listeners, um, it is Emma Thompson here calling you from Blighty, the shores of, of Great Britain. Um, my microphone is propped up on— well, actually, one of the boxes is— has got my quite posh cards in that I recently invested in, which had my name in tiny little, really sort of delicate letters. And I, I felt it was sort of quite I just thought it was classy. Anyway, I may be wrong, of course. I often am. So the books are Truth and Repair by a woman called Judith L. Herman, author of Trauma and Recovery. You may be getting a sense here. Then there's Getting Over Your Parents, which is a very important book for anyone who is human. And then there's On Being Nice, which of course is a very important thing, but don't take it too far. That's what I always say. Oh, there was one other thing. Welcome to Smartless.

Smartless.

Smartless.

Smartless.

I'm an actor and I have to be on camera today.

Oh, here. Have you been— have you been working on your faces in the mirror all morning?

Yes. Yeah. Let's see.

Surprise, surprise. Let's see.

Surprise.

Whoa, that's so good.

Now one with the mouth closed. One with the mouth closed. Still rolling. Um, so Sean, you shoot—

that's how JB directs.

Yeah, I do. Right after this, actually.

JB, is that how you direct actors?

Still rolling, still rolling. And one with the mouth closed. Okay, good, good, good. Don't look right at the camera. Don't look right at the camera. Still rolling.

Wait, wait, by the way, I just got that note. I'm not even kidding. Sean, um, can you close your mouth in this scene?

No, I swear to God, no.

Was it a dialogue scene? Did they just want you to stop? Yeah, no, I was just like, I—

no, No, it's just like my character was like, "I can't believe what you're saying." Like, I was just like, "Are you serious?" Like, kind of, "Are you serious?" So I was like— And she's like, "Can you do it with your mouth closed?" Do you—

Could you do it with your mouth closed?

I tried. I tried, really.

But you're like, "I have dialogue." They're like, "Yeah, we know.

Just mouth closed." Yeah, I'm just prepping my mouth to talk.

And you're gonna go on background. That's gonna be your cue.

And just try thinking your lines on this take.

Here we go, everybody. Wait, say it. I was doing this scene once years ago, and Eli was there. We were in France. Pants, and I had to do this long shot. I'm walking down the thing and I get to the end, and Eli goes, bro, your legs are really wide apart. Okay, your gait's really wide. I go, oh, okay. And then I had to do it like 5 more times. The whole time I'm just thinking about how I was walking. Close your legs. Which is the worst.

That's the way you walk. I could do your walk in 2 seconds.

I know, I know.

I walk like that. Oh, yeah, you're a little bowlegged. Yeah, like you just got off a horse.

Hang on. This is not an excuse to just pile on. I'm very vulnerable this morning.

I think I'm actually bowlegged. I don't think, Will, you're bowlegged. You just happen to swing your legs around one another. When you walk forward.

It's because I have long legs.

You do have long legs. I was thinking about you watching all the hockey this weekend with you filling up that goal crease.

Yeah.

You know, you need a tall guy in there, right? Get that shoulder up into the high corners.

Well, back in the day when I played, it was much more about getting on the ground, stacking the pads. Oh, sure.

Stacking the pads.

Instead of a butterfly.

So, Will, with you being a Toronto fan, are you keeping it with Canada and rooting for Montreal?

I sure am. Yeah, I'm all the way. Yeah.

And Sean, who's your pick to win this cup?

Between the two, between Canada and over there at the—

well, it looks like it's going to be Vegas. Of course, this will air afterwards, but it's pretty exciting.

Will used to— a couple of years ago or 3 years ago, Will had me record my picks. Do you remember that?

Oh, yeah. For the Stanley Cup.

Yeah. Yeah. And so every week I would record the picks and why they would win.

Sean, I'm going to give you 3 guesses what the name of the team in Las Vegas is called. The hockey team.

Is it— okay, let me ask you this. Does it have something to do with the city itself?

It does not.

Yeah, it really doesn't.

Yeah. They're not called the Chips or the Cardinals. Yeah. No.

What about—

It's Elizabethan. I'll give you a hint. It's Elizabethan. Or it's like—

well, I mean, Kings.

The Kings. The Pirates. Close. That's close. I mean, it could be any of those. The Golden Knights. The Golden Knights.

The Golden Knights.

I tell you who's golden.

Oh, here he comes. Will's got a lunch date.

You guys like a segue?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, she's golden in that she's obviously won 2 Golden Globe Awards and been nominated for like 11 or something.

Wow.

Yeah. Yeah. And won 2 Academy Awards of the 5 that she's been nominated for.

Oh, gosh.

Wait a second. 5 nominations. That's—

And Emmys. And in fact, she's the sole artist thus far to be to have received an Academy Award for both acting and screenwriting. Acting for Howard Zinn, screenwriting for Sense and Sensibility.

Emma Thompson.

I bet she's going to— Yeah, guys, it's just Emma Thompson. I can't even get into her credits. It's Emma Thompson.

Emma Thompson. No way.

Hello.

Incredible.

Incredible. Hello. Hello.

Nice to see you. I literally didn't understand a word of any of that.

I love the—

Oh, my God. 3 guys talking about hockey. It's fascinating.

I love your refugees on the floor in the back.

Background.

Yeah. Oh, can you see them?

Yeah, sure.

My daughter and her boyfriend. They can't hear you, which is just tragic, because all they can hear is me, and they're used to me.

So why, why don't you give them a cheer?

They're going to go and sit outside. I don't think you can. Hey, they're going.

Um, now where are you? Are you, uh, are you at their house or your house?

No, I'm, I'm in my office, actually. I was looking behind Sean. He's got a very posh kind of array of—

Imagine when the statue works back there.

—awards. There's like loads of statues and portraits and photos and books. And Jason's got like some sky, which is good. And Will is in deep darkness, which given the fact that he's giving us kind of vampire voice, it also works, you know? It's all making more and more sense. Yeah.

Now, we were making fun of Sean the other day because he had one of his awards behind him, as people do for some weird reason. And I moved it. On their Zoom frame usually includes any awards that one may have won. You don't have any awards behind you, and you've won tons. Where are they all?

Yeah, where are they?

The Oscars are in the lavatory. Because that just keeps them in their place. The Globes and the BAFTAs and all that are on a very high shelf somewhere where I can't see them. I don't know. I think that's very British.

We have a friend that has an award, and she keeps it in the bathroom as well. Well and puts the toilet roll, uh, on one of the extended limbs.

It's a holder. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's taking it even further than me.

You know what, I think, I think that maybe you ought to go the other way, which is have a, have a table right in your front, right in your foyer as you walk into your place with a spotlight. Yeah, just, and just lean in, like lean into it, you know what I mean?

So they know what they're dealing with.

That's it. Or you just put them in the doorway, like just so that people, when people come in, they just trip up over them. Yeah. You've got— I'm so sorry, this is my Oscars. Sorry. I'll just move them.

Right this way. Yeah.

Yeah. It's fine. Do come through. Do come through. Would you like to freshen up? Yeah. Yeah. And then have copies of them in the toilet so they can't get away ever. And then another, you know, just have them everywhere. Yeah. So people just go, I need to leave.

Why not lean into it? I think that that's a good idea.

Where is your office? Are you in England or New York or Los Angeles?

I'm so in England, but it doesn't feel like it today. We're all— actually, everyone is experiencing a trauma, a London trauma. So I'm in London, North London, where I've lived all my life. I've lived on the street since I was 6 years old. So that's 61 years. Yeah, weird. Quite weird. Anyway, suddenly we got a heat wave, which obviously has nothing to do with climate change.

No, no, it's all a hoax.

Why would we even suggest that? But it's 35 degrees in London. And which is, you know, things are just dying in front of you. Pets, household appliances, flowers, everything is just wilting. It's like, you know, Dracula's walked into the town.

And there's not a lot of air conditioning, right?

We don't know. We don't have air conditioning here. Ridiculous. Or ice. We have 3 hot days a year, or ice, but they're 36 degrees. Or ice, right? Although that's coming.

Emma, why is that? Now, now, that's coming. Why is it that it works? Why is it that Europe on the whole has somehow sort of all made a consensus decision on Europe on this, that, that, that carbonated drinks don't taste better with ice cubes? I mean, it seems pretty clear that they do, that it's just objectively true, right? That— but yet they still— you have to ask for ice with a— I sound like an ugly American here, I apologize.

No, you're just obsessed with ice. Americans have always been obsessed with ice. When I used to— You're obsessed with it. I'm sorry, but you are. When I first arrived in America and ice was just— it was just brought. You were practically put in a fucking ice bath when you arrived. He was so excited about it. Get in the ice. Get in the ice. You're going to love it. You're going to love it. Everything came with ice. You know, chicken Parmesan came with ice. I'm like, what's going on here? This is mad.

That's really funny.

Obsessed with it. And we don't have that obsession because we don't have, uh, probably, um, as much money, or, or, and our refrigerators are not as big and they don't produce ice. We all get fridges that say they produce ice, and then within a week they've broken down.

So what do you do to beat the heat?

You just lie face down on the pavement panting, hoping that some dog will come and whittle on you and cool you down. I mean, we don't have— but here's the thing, you just, you just kind of, you just take make it—

we— you don't— we don't need to always be in our perfect comfort zones at all times. No, that's the whole point of life. There are things that happen. There are days where you're hot and you deal, and there are days that are cold. But it is true that in this country— I'm Canadian, by the way, Emma, so I know you're Canadian, Will darling.

But I think you guys are used to extreme temperatures, and we live in a temperate zone. Yes. And we're really not used to it. And now because of climate change, look at my face. I mean, I'm the same color as one of the stripes in my shirt. It's tragic. But, you know, it's like we're just not We're just not used to it. And it's quite— it's really weird, actually.

It's so much. How was it last summer? Last summer it was super hot there, too, right?

Europe had a huge heat wave. Yeah, super hot. And I was traveling on the Tube.

Were you there? I was there last summer.

He was doing his play. He was doing his play.

Oh, man.

It was so hot. And like, to everybody's point, there's no air conditioning. We were staying in a place that had air conditioning. But if there was— and we were rehearsing in a place that was like a greenhouse with no air.

And what about the theater, Sean? Did the theater have air conditioning?

No air conditioning in the theater.

What? No, there's no air conditioning in our theaters. Come on. Because we've never needed it before, and we haven't adapted yet to climate change.

I wanna— Emma, you're talking about taking the tube. What's your experience like when you take the tube? Are you, in London, are you approached constantly and mobbed by people asking you No questions?

And no, no, no, not at all. Nobody takes any notice on the tube. They're all looking at their phones.

Yeah, but my guess is that when they, when they do recognize you, it's something very charming and respectful, and, and they, they say which movie that they love. It's like, she's a respected actor as opposed to like a celebrity. Like, you see a celebrity out, it's, it's like, it's like a, a, a giraffe has escaped the zoo and you got to get a picture.

Yes, it's a different thing. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. I'm very lucky, I think, because, um, it's the same in Europe. People have a relationship with— I don't know what it's like for you guys, but, you know, you must have this, Jason, that people have a relationship with a particular role that you might have played, or maybe a couple. And we've done lots and lots of different things. So that it— I think if, for instance, you're sort of an action hero, I can imagine that for somebody like I don't know, Schwarzenegger or Stallone or Bruce Willis, you know, then there's a very specific response every single time. But for me, you know, I can pass, not necessarily unnoticed, but certainly it's never been an issue, actually.

What's your least favorite kind of interaction with a fan? Like when you're with your family or— I mean, because it's like there's some— I always get embarrassed if it ever causes, like, a scene. In other words, grabs the attention of others that might not otherwise know who I am or notice, you know, like, it's great when it's just sort of mellow and quiet and passing, right?

Yes, I mean, it's lovely, and people will just pass you and still keep walking. Yeah. They go, "Love your work. Bye." Yeah. Lovely. But when you're sort of buying— sausages with your daughter, right? You don't really want them to come up and go, "Can I have a selfie?" Selfies are interesting, aren't they? How do you guys feel about those? Right. Well, how do you feel about the— do you feel that they're intrusive at all? What do you think?

Well, no, but I, I— what I have noticed is that in the old days, it used to be autographs, and if you didn't have a piece of paper or a pen, uh, then it was just, "Hey, nice, nice to meet you and like your work," and it was, it was a night. But now everybody's got a phone, so even if you don't want an photograph, right, slash picture, you still sort of feel obligated. Well, I better take this, you know. And so people kind of line up a little bit. And anyway, it's— I'm not— I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining.

Do you ever say no?

No, never. Um, and I've been with people— I don't— I mean, never is probably— I might— I'm sure I have, but I don't. I do when I'm with the kids sometimes.

When I'm— when I'm— when I'm with— if I'm with the kids or with the little kids. And if— and if it's an adult asking, I'll say nothing. I've never said no to a kid. I have said that.

I have. Yeah, but I've said I'm the same, Will.

I wouldn't ever say no to a child, but sometimes if I'm with the family, I'll say, "Would you mind awfully? I just— I'm with my family." And what's so interesting to me is that every time I have said no, and it's quite rare, people have taken it so well because they seem completely to understand. So in a way, I feel like they know what they're asking for, that what they're asking for is a little bit— kind of, it's a lot to take a photograph with somebody.

I have some famous friends that they say no all the time. They never say yes. And it makes me so uncomfortable that they're like—

I just feel like that's so embarrassing. Because it's such an easy give in a way.

Right. It's an easy give. Have you ever gotten, um, "Hey, can I get a picture really quick?" And then they hand you the camera? 'Cause that's happened to me.

They want you to take a picture of them with their friends.

Yeah. Many times.

I've also many times got, "Oh my God, you're—" And then they say the name of a completely different actress. So I have the choice. I either say, "Yes, I am so-and-so. I would love to give you a photograph." Or I say, "I'm 20 years younger." Or I say, "Oh, I'm 20 years older." Or I say, "No, she's dead, actually." But then I just kind of move gently on through.

Uh-huh. You know what's funny?

I had the other day, I had— I was sitting in a restaurant, and I had two interactions in a row, back to back. First of all, I had a woman come over and say, And I was sitting with my sister and my brother-in-law and our buddy Eli, um, Canadian Eli. And he said— this woman said, um, "So sorry to bother you, and I know that you're eating," and then proceeded to sit down on the bench next to me and begin a conversation. At which point I was like, "Well, you're not that bothered." "No, just to grab a fry." Then she left. She left. And then this other woman came over and she said, "My friend is a fan, but I'm sorry, what's your name?" And Eli goes, "Jason Bateman." She said, "Thank you so much," and she walked away. Really? JB, I forgot to tell you that. It was so good. It was so good.

Oh, I had a really wonderful one. I was in Harry's Bar in Venice, which is, you know, the original Harry's Bar, and it was very nice. It was years and years ago. And a woman came up. She was in the other room, and she kept on peeling off these massive smiles and grins at me and waving. And I thought, "Okay, so she must know my work, obviously." That seems fair enough. I'm in Venice. It's the festival, blah. Anyway, she came over as she was leaving and said, "I'm so happy to see you in here." I said, "Oh, thank you," thinking, "Why?" And then she said, "You know, I still wear those shoes. I wear them all the time. I love them. You were so right. I was wrong and you were right." I'm thinking, "Shoes?" And then she said, "You remember—" I'm staring at her thinking, "I just can't work this one out. I haven't made a film about shoes, have I?" Anyway, She said, "You remember the fifth floor in Barneys?" So she thought that I'd sold her a pair of shoes in the shoe department at Barneys. And she was thrilled to see me in Harry's Bar 'cause clearly that meant I was doing quite well for myself.

Do you know what I mean? That I was like in the same— I was in the same arena as a woman who buys shoes on the fifth floor at Barneys. And that gave her pleasure, and she needed to convey that to me, which was very kind, I thought, actually. And I said, "I'm so glad they stayed." still fit. Good for you.

All right, now, Emma, do you miss Barney's like I miss Barney's? I do.

Yeah, I miss— sorry, I really do.

We were just talking about it the other day.

I miss it so much. We're admitting to terrible shallowness, but I do.

I really do. But admit—

but by the way, both New York and LA. Sad. I miss them both.

Yeah, both places. I love those place.

I love that. What happened to it?

What happened? Why would it go belly up? It's because people shop online now, right?

Is that right? I guess. Yeah, yeah, everything.

I used to go to the shoe, right, direct to the shoe department at the Oh, no.

You just walk in that men's— you walk in the back way there on, like, what is that, like 59th Street? You can walk in that back door.

I was talking about Los Angeles. And there was one downtown, too.

Well, the original on 17th Street.

Yeah. Oh, guys, keep saying numbers. Say numbers more.

And we will be right back.

And now back to the show. Wait, Emma.

So listen, let's go back. Let's go back. Let's go back. I love— let's start the interview.

Let's listen to the questions.

This is where the interview starts. Guys, Emma's here.

Emma, we're the worst interviewers of all time. I'm so sorry. And you're realizing that in real time. And your regret is evident. We— So, I didn't know that you were— that you started— Well, not started, but you were in the acclaimed Footlight Sketch Group at Cambridge, which has seen a lot of great performers. So, you have a history of sketch comedy, which is so amazing. I didn't know that.

That's cool. Oh, yeah. I did that.

Would that be like the British Lampoon type of thing?

Sort of, yeah. It's an equivalent to sort of the Lampoon in a way-ish. But it's more of a sketch.

But you know, it's like SNL. SNL is basically what I would think of as review. Mm, right, right. So back in the day, in the early part of the 20th century, review was huge in our country. And it was basically a collection of sketches, songs, you know, just a kind of review. Like a variety show. A variety show, yes. And that's what we did. It's completely dead now. We don't have review anymore. But SNL is a form of review. It really is. It's sketches and songs and music. It's little bites. And I started doing that, absolutely, with Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry. Yeah. Oh, wow. Did it for years. In fact, I was going to be a comedian. That was what I wanted to be because I admired Lily Tomlin. I never knew that. So— Oh, greatly.

Oh my gosh.

And Jane Wagner, you know, the signs of intelligent life in the universe. All of her beautiful characters. Yeah, incredible. I love that. That's what I wanted to do for a living.

But you are still doing it, 'cause anytime there's a character that lends itself even slightly to comedy, you take that and you expand that, and you're always freaking hilarious whenever you choose to be. Excellent timing. That beautiful British dryness. It's just, oh, it's so good.

Well, I mean, I was gonna ask you, I mean, these guys are gonna make fun of me, I'm a massive Harry Potter fan. Oh, no kidding. And you—

Show us the wand.

I wish I had it. I really do have one. But you as Professor Sybil, right? Professor Sybil. Sybil Trelawney, yeah. Yeah. That was— She said, "Fatigued." Speaking about characters and Lily Tomlin and Jane— and all those things that Lily Tomlin— When I saw that, it was such a— and this is a compliment— such a big character in a world that has big characters, with the— You guys, if you haven't seen it, she has Coke bottle glasses, like, literally this thick, that make her eyeballs this big. And she's neurotic, and she gets possessed. And it's such an incredible character. How did you trust that that was— that your choice to come in on the first day—

We talk about this a lot on the show. With a huge swing.

Which a huge swing was gonna be— How did you trust that? You know what I mean?

You don't really, do you?

And how did you come up with the character?

Well, it's written in the books. That she has those glasses? It is written in the books, yeah. I think she's definitely nearly blind, can't see anything. And obviously deeply neurotic because she can see sometimes whether people are, you know, have the Grimm or not. So, I mean, honestly, in my quite long career, given the fact that I'm 60, I'm a good 10 years older than all of you guys. I have done many, many parts, and I've spent about 30 days on Harry Potter in my whole life. So it's kind of a strange thing to talk about because it's become such this huge phenomenon. And that's a lot of the time, that's what— people are very sort of drawn to that.

People stop you. I mean, I've also seen Saving Mr. Banks like 20 times, and I've seen Sense and Sensibility. Oh, gorgeous, gorgeous. Thank you.

Oh, good. I'm so glad. No, no, I wasn't getting at you. Yeah, yeah. It's just that—

Just to make sure.

You know what it's like, guys, when you decide to play someone, you just have to fling yourself into it, don't you, headfirst, and hope that your instincts are right.

Yeah. Well, there's always that thing, 'cause we talk about that idea, you know, I always say it's like when you first arrive and you're doing something, you've made a sort of a choice, and you want to make sure that you're not at a different volume than everybody else, especially if you come in in the middle. That's what I'm saying, yeah.

You know what I mean? And you're like— Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's true. Am I in a different movie? Yeah, am I in a different movie?

I came in, I did something this winter, and I sort of came in, they'd been working for a while, and I thought, like, "Oh, boy." And I had a real look going.

And I thought— What was the look, Will? What was the look?

He was sort of like a retired rocker, and he's sort of down on his luck. And Pedro Pascal comes in, and he's my brother, and I just, like— And I sort of worked on it with the director, with Tony Gilroy, and I thought, "Okay, this is it." At the same time, I thought, like, you know, that first moment, like, here we go, guys, and we're rolling. I'm like, boy, this better work. You know what I mean?

Yeah, it's so scary.

But at least Tony had seen it.

Yes, he had. And we talked about it, but still, you hadn't— we hadn't done it. You know what I mean?

So you don't get to rehearse like us. It's quite rare, isn't it, in film that you get to rehearse? Whereas in theater, you know, it's all about rehearsal. Yeah. All about rehearsal. I love it. So, sometimes I think it's a shame we don't get enough rehearsal in film. But, you know, again, it's a very mysterious business, filming. It is. You never know what's gonna come out. And the camera's so odd, don't you think? Bit of a sort of witchy presence, I find.

Well, you also have that thing when you finish something and you go— and people say, "How was it?" And you're like, "I don't know yet." You know, that sort of— in that period of sort of waiting. And J.B., obviously, when you're there, when you're in post and you're putting a film together, you're living with it, and it's breathing with you all the time. And so, like, you have a sense of it, but everybody else kind of goes away.

Yeah, there really is always— Emma, you've done some directing, right? Yes? No? No, I've never directed. Have you not? No. Why did I feel like you had a couple of times? But there is just that—

Why haven't you? Let's press her.

Emma, can you check that you haven't? Yeah, sure.

We'll wait. We'll wait. I've interfered massively.

That's not directing, though. That's just taking part in a slightly upsetting way. I— especially with, I suppose, with the films with children in, I've spent a lot of time with the children because that's important. And the films I've made for young people, I always consider children to be the sacred audience. They're the people we need to make the best of our work for because— And they don't lie. It's the first time that they see something. It needs to be so good. He was so good.

God, you've done so many things over so many genres. When you're speaking of the children's films and stuff, so many things. And I was just— I watched within the last year a film that you did a few years ago. Oh, God. Probably 10 years ago. But it's based on one of my favorite books of all time, which is Alone in Berlin. Oh, my God.

You saw that? You're like one of 3 people. Of course.

I love— That book was incredible to me. Oh, I love that book.

It's just such an amazing book.

One of the best second halves of a book I've ever read. It's just mesmerizing. And so then— and then I realized they made a film. And so I just— I didn't know that you had made that film. And I watched it. It was beautiful. It was lovely. It's such a great story. Is it a World War II story? Mm-hmm. It is. It's almost a piece of resistance art in a way, the book is, and the film. And how do you— because you do these things across so many different genres, how do you decide to do a film like Alone in Berlin, let's say, I don't want to say, but just for instance, is it always just material-based or where you're— how you're feeling, like, at a certain time in your life and you're like, "I want to do something that's kind of moodier," or how do you go about that process?

I think you're right. I think it's a little bit like meeting the right person at the right time or reading the right book at the right time. Things come to you at moments when perhaps you need them. I think as artists, sometimes we need to play certain things. I think it's just coming at us. I mean, I think it's all sort of out there moving around us all the time. And then things pass us by and we think, "Oh, I wish I could have— Oh, well, actually, no, that was wrong." And then someone comes— something comes in and hits us right in the center of us. And you go, "I really want to tell that story now." And sometimes you don't know why, but I always know. I always know if there's some— if it's something I want to do. I always know. And it's not even— it's not something I could quantify, qualify in any useful way. It's literally something will come across my path and I go, "Oh, oh, that's a wonderful story." I mean, Alone in Berlin is— I mean, I'm kind of slightly obsessed with both wars, actually, because I think they left traumas in our country, in the UK, that have never really been been healed or addressed.

And so Alone in Berlin, for me, is just this beautiful— I mean, the book is incredible. If you haven't read it, do. It's Haffner, isn't it? It's his pseudonym, isn't it, Will? Sebastian Haffner. Hans Fallada? Hans Fallada, yeah. And his actual name is perhaps the other one.

Yeah, I get that, that when I— Sean, you can go get a snack. Three Stooges, right, Sean? When that came— Yeah.

Emma, have you ever taken apart a character, said yes to it, because that character has sort of a personality trait that you are thinking seriously about expanding in your own life, and this might be a fun way to kind of play a little bit with that and try it on and maybe incorporate some of it at the end if it goes well? Kind of, because I've done that a couple of times.

That's really interesting.

Really? Like, you're like, I wanna be like, I'm gonna play this smarty pants because— Yeah.

I'd like to be a little bit more like how I'm kind of reading this character in this script, and this would be kind of an easy little cheat to try that.

Is that DTF? Is that DTF?

Yeah. But, like, yeah, sometimes it's for the director, or the story, or the other cast, or whatever. But then sometimes it's, "Oh, I kind of always wanted to be kind of like that, and maybe I'll try a little bit here." Have you ever done that?

I think I did that with Down Cemetery Road. I did a telly recently. It's a series called Down Cemetery Road, which is— is a quote from a Philip Larkin poem. And it's a Mick Herron book. It's the Slow Horses group. And I think I— I mean, not only do I love the author, but the character. She's sort of my age, probably grew up in London during the slightly seamy '60s. I mean, as a child in the '60s, you know, I think about my childhood in London, really close to the end of the war that was. I mean, I was born in 1959, so it's 14 years after the end of the Second World War. It's nothing really. It's like a blink of an eye. And therefore— still rebuilding. Yeah. Oh, God. Yes, absolutely. And still, to a certain extent, a little bit of, you know, not having quite enough to eat. And it was, I think, quite dark, probably. Which is, you know, one of the reasons why Alone in Berlin was interesting for me as well. But I think that this character, Zoe, is not a good girl. I was brought up to be very good, very obedient, very— not in a bad way, but in a way that I think that many, many girls in my culture are brought up to be.

Always lovely and kind and loving and, and emollient and accepting and tolerant. And, um, I think that whilst there is a place for that in both sexes, it is not appropriate for it to be just women who do that, and nor is it sometimes appropriate for them to do it at all. So, you know, um, actually this woman doesn't do it in any way. She just— She's a very, um, releasing sort of character because she's unapologetic and certainly not polite. Right. And whilst she has kindness, certainly, and empathy inside her, she uses it very judiciously and not, as it were, just as a kind of scattergun technique to avoid conflict or— for being judged, for not being, you know, a nice woman. Sure.

Does she weaponize it?

Um, what do you mean?

Like, uses it like it's calculated the way it's used, or no?

No, it's quite natural. It's quite natural. It's not really a— it's just an instinct. She's just nice.

Like, I always feel when Sean's being kind to me, he's just manipulating me. You know what I mean?

Well, that's true, I think. Yeah. I mean, I think you're right about that, clearly.

Wait, Emma, you grew up in the UK.

I was just thinking, so both your— as you talk about this, and both your parents, correct me if I'm wrong, were actors. Is that right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. So you grew up like this is a sort of a— you grew up in the family biz in a way. Is that right?

Yes, I did. But it was the family business of theater. Yeah. So my parents grew up at a time when there really was no television. So they expected, naturally, as actors— my father was working class from a southern town, town in our— Guilford. Had not very much education, was very self-taught, decided to become an actor and leave that patch. I mean, he was a proper leaver of everything that he came from. You know, his mother, my grandmother, was a servant. She went into service when she was 16 years old. And indeed, one of her children, of wedlock because she was raped by one of her employers. So her journey as a mother with these 4 children was really quite dramatic. And Dad got out and went into the theater and met my mother, who's from Scotland, very different culture and background. Presbyterian, Scottish Presbyterian, so very, um, Well, puritanical, actually. Yeah. One can't really avoid that, even though she's never been able to resist good wine, which is excellent. But, you know, there was— I did grow up in this very interesting sort of combination. But they did theater and they expected to do Shakespeare in the provinces.

And just— and then radio. And then television arrived. We didn't have a television until I was, I don't know, 8, and it was black and white. You know, we didn't do that. We didn't have that. And now it's so different. It's kind of indescribably strange, actually.

You mean the amount of content that's out there to distract you by?

The breadth of it all, sort of, in a way.

Yeah. And the amount that must be produced.

Right.

What was your policy with your kids? Did you— were you someone that was, um, screens are okay, television's okay, iPads are okay? Um, uh, or were you like, no, it's reading, um, or it's piano lessons, or it's— 'Cause I grew up in one of those households, very, very disciplined, although there was plenty of TV too.

It was kind of a combo. It was a good combo, I think. We told my daughter the television was broken, which she believed for at least 8 years. Um, and— Still broken. It's still broken. And then she danced in at the age of about 9 and said, "I've mended it." She just found the sodding remote. Anyway, and we didn't allow her to have a phone until she was at secondary school at the age of 13. Yeah. Smart. So iPads, oh God, sometimes when we were driving, we live in Scotland as well. We were driving to Scotland and iPad was a wonderful thing. You need that, yeah.

To film on. And then they got you filming.

Film, which actually I don't feel guilty about. If it's a good film, it's a lovely way to spend 2 hours. Because I used to be stuck in the car for 8 hours as we were driving to Scotland with nothing to do but stare at the lamppost going by and do terrible sort of—

but it's good for the imagination though. It's really good. Think about all those—

boredom's good for the imagination as well. We've lost our relationship with being bored.

Managing boredom is a the talent, everybody.

Okay, here's my question to all of you. When was the last time you were actually bored?

This weekend. Really? Why? How? Well, just because I was inside the whole time. It was raining, and I ran out of good TV. I had done all my homework, and I— but then guess what happens? You get truly relaxed. I really feel like true relaxation lives somewhere next door to boredom, and that's when naps happen and clarity of mind and all your priorities get in the right order and you can think about what's— like, it's a great— managing boredom, embracing boredom, seeing the virtues of boredom is something that I just don't think that my, my kids, their generation, is, uh, is— understands or is friends with. They can't even ride an elevator without looking at their phone. Yeah, red light, constant stimulation.

Yeah, I've actually, I've actually said to my both my sons at various points, you cannot walk down the stairs looking your phone. That has to be something that is independent of your phone. This is absurd. But I will say, you know what? I was talking about this with a friend recently. I'm never bored. Even if I'm just sitting there, I don't know why. I never feel bored.

Right. I don't mean it as a pejorative. I just feel like it's like there's— you're not— we're all so— I think most people in the world today are are highly functioning. Like, we're just like trained to manage 50 different things at the same time just because it's just sort of global productivity. But there is a great—

God, you're always talking about productivity. It's unbelievable. You never shy away from productivity. Sean, I was just thinking, Sean, I wonder when you hear Emma talk about growing up in the theater and her parents— Hi, Sean, by the way.

Welcome to the podcast. Thank you so much for having me. I'm such big fans.

Do you wish, in a way, when you hear about people who grew up in the theater and stuff, do you feel, knowing how much you enjoy that, do you ever feel like, "Oh, I wish I'd grown up in that kind of environment"?

Yeah, all the time. Well, even Jason, growing up around Hollywood and in it, or Emma growing up in it, you know, like—

When did it start for you, Sean? It was high school, right?

Yeah, yeah, high school. Well, junior high. I worked backstage. I worked the theater. The light, not the lights. It was just one light. And it was— yeah, it was one switch. Seriously, it was on and off. And it was— we got our guy, we got our guy. I was like, I think I can do that. And, um, it was Calamity Jane, the musical Calamity Jane. Oh yeah. And, um, yeah, that was junior high. And then high school. And then I was nervous about telling my family I was in theater because it wasn't associated with sports. And I thought, what were they gonna think? And so my oldest brother was like, hey dude, it's okay, bro. Like, I, I play football, I have makeup on, underneath my eyes, the black marks underneath my eyes, just like you wear makeup. And I was like, oh, that's really sweet. And then, um, and then other things happened. But, uh, well, let's not get into that. But yeah, I always, you know, I was— I don't know that I love to do it anymore. I mean, the grind of theater is something, right, Emma, that you just have to— the, the repetition on your body and your brain is, is something you you kind of have no choice but to outgrow because of the endurance.

We'll be right back.

And back to the show.

What was the last theater production you were a part of, Emma? Because you've done so many.

Well, I haven't actually. I've mostly done film. But the last thing I did was something I— Again, you know, we were talking earlier about things that you just can't say no to. They asked me to do Sweeney Todd. Steve Sondheim's Sweeney Todd with Bryn Terfel, and I did it. We did it with the New York Philharmonic at the Lincoln Center. Wow. We did 5 performances there, and then we did 2 weeks at the Dominion here. And that was— When was this? How cool. It was 10 years ago, maybe. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. And you'd be great.

And I'm sure you were phenomenal.

Oh my God. It was just— It's a perfect part for you. Absolutely. You mean the psychotic, like, woman who kills people and puts them in toxic— Walk it back, Sean. No, but— Sean, Sean, Sean, Sean.

You gotta let Sean finish, Emma.

No, the comedy of it, I'm sure you nailed it.

No, I'm sure I was— did way too— went way too far. But anyway, the point was, we were on stage with the New York Philharmonic, and one of the things that really I loved about it was the sort of cross-pollination of different art forms, that you had a whole orchestra on stage that you could use you could act with. So, you know, you were acting while the timpanist was behind you making these amazing noises, and they loved it as well. The orchestra adored it because you were in amongst them. And I think that we silo music, classical music in particular, and acting in the theater, you know, which sometimes can just make people feel a little bit superior, which is not the case.

It's just acting. She's looking right at you, Sian.

And then there's the television acting, which is television acting. You've got to be really clever with the camera. If you're a good actor, you're a good actor, you're a good actor whatever you're doing. I can't bear all that, all that snobbery, which was very much alive when my parents, um, were coming up. So yeah, I, I— that was the last thing I did. And I— oh, it— I mean, it was an amazing feeling. Like, I don't know whether you guys have ever had this, but when you do something that uses every single cell of you. Nothing is left behind. You know how you can come on, particularly to do a job that's a short job, and you're doing a small part or a cameo role, and you're using a tiny little bit of your palette, and you have to be careful not to overdo it? That's very much to your point, Sean, about Professor Trelawney. It had to be a very specific small thing, and it had to be right, but it had to be big as well. But this had to be right. It had to be enormous, and it used absolutely everything I had, right?

I, and I had such a wonderful time doing it, but my God, it was— it took me 9 months to learn it. Yeah. And then I did it for like 30 performances.

Yeah, I hear Sondheim is, is, is almost as difficult as Shakespeare, right? Sometimes. I mean, you've got the music part of it as well.

Yeah, finding those notes and those chords is is really hard.

I would say harder, yeah. Harder than Shakespeare. Shakespeare makes it easy for us. He's like a wonderful old sailing boat you can get into and just sail into the sunset. Really? 'Cause he's so reliable.

Well, speaking of writing, I mentioned that you're the only female performer to have won for acting and writing, and you wrote Sense and Sensibility. And how did that happen?

I did not know that.

'Cause I didn't know that either. And so, it's double my fault, really.

I adapted it. Jane Austen wrote it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm playing— I plagiarized mercilessly. Yeah. Oh, it's not original. No, no. How— But how did that happen with the great Ang Lee, right? Directed—

With the great Ang Lee. Actually, it happened kind of interestingly because, like I said, I used to do comedy. That was my thing. That's what I wanted to do. And I was very lucky because I worked with a wonderful comedy producer. He produced the first all-Black comedy series in the UK, Desmond's. And then he worked with an awful lot of Black and Asian and around female comedians. He was, I suppose, quite revolutionary in that sense. And I made a comedy series with him. And one of the sketches I wrote was about a young woman coming back from her honeymoon to see her mother with a bit— with something on her mind. And she starts to talk to her mother about a small, little woodland hairy creature that lives in her husband's lap that he's drawn attention to on several occasions and that appears to be attached and also changes shape sometimes that she just doesn't want to touch or have anything to do with. And, um, so the sketch is about sexual ignorance. So it's a feminist sketch about the fact that women weren't allowed to know about sex, but then they were just sent off into the wild.

They were married off without any kind of help whatsoever. And can you imagine coming across a penis for the first time and then seeing it become erect in front of your very eyes and not know what it was? That's what we put people through. Anyway, so the sketch was about that. And I think it was quite funny. And our producer, Lindsay Duran, the extraordinary Hollywood producer who actually started her work with Spinal Tap— excuse me, literally one of my favorite films ever. Sure. So she wrote to me and said, "I've seen your sketch about that." about the Victorian penis. I wonder if you would fancy adapting a Jane Austen novel? I thought, interesting, interesting segue. Yeah. Wow. I said, well, I'll give it a go. So I gave it a go.

Amazing. Give it a go.

Amazing. Now what about, what about other, other screenplays afterwards? Forgive my ignorance. Is that something?

No, not at all. I wrote— I've really been forgiving your ignorance. Loads that haven't been made. Actually. So, but I wrote— I've written a couple of kids' films, one called The Nanny McPhee, who's a strange sort of warty witchy woman. Um, and, um, actually we've spent 10 years writing the musical of that, which is coming into the West End next year. No way!

Wow. Who wrote the music for that?

Gary Clark, who wrote the music for Sing Street, which was, um, a lovely sort of beautiful Irish film. So he's one of those people who just can write songs. He spent years and years in Nashville. And you just think about the music industry, it's just amazingly full of these people who— He was in a band and it was kind of going, but he didn't like the fame, he didn't like the glare, so he retreated and started to write songs. And he's written so many songs. Songs with, I mean, so many of the greats. He's just a wonderful songwriter. And we have written about a billion songs, cut a billion songs. We've been writing it for so long. I gave him a couple of touchstones. I said, "Think Tom Waits, Swordfish Trombone. And also, do you know a gang called the Tiger Lilies? They're quite a wild thing." Yeah, that was the kind of thing. I was like a Victorian steampunk, slightly dark, you know, a little bit on the circus side but not, you know, like dark. That sounds great. So that's what we've been doing.

Well, that's really cool. Yeah, I can't wait for that.

Uh, we— I would be remiss if we didn't mention your new, uh, uh, project, The Sheep Detective. The Sheep Detective?

What is that about? No, that's Craig Mason. Craig Mason, the great Craig Mason. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

I love Craig. JB, your old buddy.

He wrote Chernobyl. He's such a wonderful, wonderful man. And then he wrote— he adapted a book where, yeah, um, it's about a shepherd who gets murdered and his sheep solve the crime. I mean, that's it. That's the logline. You just go, yes, I'll be in it. I'll play a sheep. I'll play anything. I'll play a broom. I'll play anything. Yeah, it's such a good, uh, premise.

And this is, uh, starring Hugh Jackman.

Sounds like a great yarn, guys. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

I noticed that. No, thank you.

I hear this is— I hear this is a really, really good film that parents will like as well because it is made for the kids, right?

It's you and, and, uh, the delightful Hugh Jackman. Is that right? Am I right about that? Yeah.

Did you have to work with— you have to work with some, uh, um, uh, photorealistic, uh, uh, animals or some—

or is it, uh, photorealistic actors. No, I, I, no, we actually, I was only on it for about 3 weeks. I'd just done a thriller in Finland, and, um, so I was, and then I was going on to the telly, so I sort of kind of dropped in for 3 weeks with this lovely bunch of folk, and that, it was gorgeous.

Yeah, it sounds like a gorgeous type of location, right?

Where did you shoot that? Oh God, now you're asking me. I mean, it was in England. It wasn't actually, we shot the second Nanny McPhee in the same village because it's a kind kind of picture-perfect village. And I can't remember what it's called.

Well, most importantly— I think it's called Hambleton, actually.

I think I've actually remembered that, which is a fucking miracle, given that I'm literally 175 degrees here. Yeah. Now, my brain's boiling.

Was it close enough to your house where you could sleep in your own bed, or did you have to stay? No, so not.

So, so not. No. Okay. Never happens.

Never. You know what I love about England, staying in an English hotel, especially a small English hotel, is an English breakfast. I adore an English breakfast. Who doesn't?

Which is what? Well, there's different kinds. So, Will, what do you get?

You like the little sausage? Well, I'm not getting— I don't generally— Yeah, I shy away from the black puddings, but I like eggs and sausage.

What's black pudding? I've never had black pudding.

Yeah, what's in a black pudding?

Haven't you, Sean? Molasses? It's pig's blood.

No. No, it's not.

It's congealed. It is.

It's pig's blood mixed up with various sort of spices and grains. Oh my God. It's like haggis.

Look at Jesus Christ.

Because I'm half Scottish, and haggis is a sheep's stomach. Oh my God. And the sheep's stomach is filled with all the sort of offal, which is all chopped up with various bits of— Did somebody just make a sheep noise? Oh my God. Um, and—

Well, why do we have these kinds of foods over there?

Is it because—

Because it's so good.

The country's so old that, that you had to figure out how to, how to make stuff you could eat out of what was available, right? This is before—

but also, you know, you didn't waste anything, right? So if you killed a cow, you ate its fucking stomach as well, and it's the only thing you didn't eat was its hair. Yeah, you know, and its horns. You had to work out how— if you had an animal and you killed it, because you don't You forget it's really quite recent that the country's— I suppose Scotland in particular was poor, very poor, until recently, and in many areas is still poor. Now, do you—

the longest I've ever spent in England is just recently last year for, like, 3 or 4 months.

What were you doing there, Sean?

Do you get, Emma, do you get— are you as entranced still by the charm of the country and everything around it and the history? Or are you just kind of like, "It is what it is, and yep, there's Big Ben, there's the thing," thing. I'm, I'm, I'm so used to it that it's hard to appreciate it anymore, or do you still feel like, wow?

Oh no, I'm, I'm much more entranced than I was when I was young. I, I mean, I just adore it. I'm a Londoner, but I'm also a Scot. My mother's Scottish. So for me, the most beautiful countryside is, is in Scotland, and Scotland is wild and it's very, um, yeah, You know, it's unheld, it's unbound, and it's full of the most extraordinary energies. And London is also, you know, a very precious place because everyone— this great teeming bowl of people living in this massive city, generally speaking, quite peacefully. Yeah, I'm very— I love, love my city. I'm not as familiar with England, actually, the country countryside, but the countryside in England can be quite breathtaking. You go up to Yorkshire in the north or Northumberland, or, you know, we were shooting all over those. We shot in Cornwall last year, and I'd never really spent any time in Cornwall, and I just wanted to go and live there. It was so exquisite and full of— still full of character and community. Actually.

You know what, might I suggest a non-scripted show, Emma, where you go around and discover— rediscover England? There you go. Yeah, we're going to produce it. Listen, we're going to pitch it to you. We're going to get in touch with your people.

You will have to come with me.

Yes, I'm a devoted Anglophile.

These guys know. And the sheep go with you and comment on—

they come with. Yeah, and then at the end of the show we eat them. Yeah, sure, of course.

Every piece. Every piece. And Jason takes Jason takes the stomach.

You all have to take one particular really sort of unpleasant part, like the pancreas, and then you invent a really good little recipe just for that part. I'll take the colon.

I'll take the colon. By the way, by the way, I'm gonna put this out there. I'm gonna put this out there. There is somebody listening right now, maybe over in the UK, who's gonna say, like, this is a great idea. And you are gonna get an incoming call. It is a good idea, actually. Right? I would watch the hell out of that.

Yeah, I would watch that too. Of Emma going through England discovering villages in different—

like Stanley Tucci in Italy. I can't wait.

I can't wait. I'm an EP on that one.

I'll just go around saying endlessly, "You want some gain?" That was my favorite phrase. "You want some gain?" "You want more of this?" That was Jason, as he was saying, "You want some gain?" It just sounded so— oh yes, I think I do want some gain, actually.

That's hot podcast talk.

What are you going to suggest next?

Uh, Emma, we have taken up too much of your time. It's been— it's probably been an hour. It's— what an absolute delight to have you here.

That was real fast.

Yeah, that was fast. I hope you get to cool off and jump on a pool.

We could have gone on forever. No, I'm literally gonna go, and I put the blooming scooter thing on in the garden. I'm gonna go and stand in it now.

Yeah, I don't think we got to any questions even. On the next— next time you come on the show, we're actually going to ask you some questions.

On the next Martles.

Yeah, yeah. That was so lovely, guys. Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Thank you for doing so much, for your time and for everything that you and we're just such fans. It's just— Yeah, we are.

Well, right back at you. Every single one of you, I love you deeply.

Likewise. Thank you, my dear. Uh, make sure you pick your kids up off the floor and—

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. No, they've gone. They've long gone. They're lying face down on the wet lawn. All righty, fare thee well. Thanks, Emma.

Bye. Um, guys, yeah, Emma Thompson.

Have you seen Remains of the Day? Yes. Yes. I mean, I've seen that so many times. How many films do you think she's done?

I bet she's done like 65 movies.

Well, what's better than that? How many great films has she done? I know. Like so many.

64. So many incredible performances. Yeah. And just so different in every genre. Effortless.

Yeah. And I meant it. She is— there's always some sort of cheeky little wink always to each one of her characters. Oh, you find her to be a little cheeky, do you? She's a bit cheeky.

She's a bit cheeky. She also emanates kind of like she's going to take care of me. Like, she's my mom. Yes. And I like that. I want her to take care of me. I'm going to send her my number.

I mean, think about it. Love Actually. Oh, yeah. Forgot about that massive hit that everybody's still—

I think you squandered an opportunity there, Will. You really could have gone down an incredible memory lane of parts and movies and stuff. Instead, you're fucking talking about haggis and—

But there was no time because we were just having a conversation, man.

We're just visiting, weren't we?

Yeah, we're just having a quick little visit. We're not journalists.

No. Yeah, we'll have to have her back.

Yeah, you know, we're just, uh, love action.

We're just simple guys, you know. We're not very smart. In fact, we're smart less. Oh, oh wow. So, so, so, so, see, so right there, that I was just introducing a new sign-off. Instead of bye, okay, we work on some sort of way to just say, yeah, I guess we're just kind of, kind of smart less. Yeah. And It's over.

But that's the only one you can use then. You can only say we're a little—

Right, but you gotta somehow work that into the sentence. Yeah, but that's just—

could just be like—

but that, that came out of this process of us doing that, you know what I mean? Yeah, like that's a natural progression. If in a way it's almost— you could call it like a byproduct of the show. Smart. Smartless. Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Michael Grant Terry, Rob Armcharf, and Bennett Barbaco. Smartless.