Transcript of NFL Week 2, Fastest 2 Minutes, The Bears Suck Again, The Giants/Cowboys Game Of The Day, Chiefs In Trouble? + Who's Back Of The Week

Hey, part of my take, listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcast, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, week 2 in the NFL. We're going to talk every game from Sunday. The bears suck. The Cowboys and Giants played a thriller. Russell Wilson might be back. The Eagles beat the Chiefs in a Super Bowl rematch. Match.

Does the NFL have a toe problem?

Does the NFL have a toe problem? We have fastest two minutes. We have Who's Back of the Week. It's going to be a great episode, and it's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. Draftkings Casino has your playbook for gaming action all season long. Play thousands of popular slots for a shot at Jackpots. Over 400 million has already been awarded. New players get 500 spins on Huff and More Puff over 10 days. So download the app, use code Take and claim your spins after your first five-dollar wager get in the game with DraftKings Casino, home of the largest jackpot win in online casino history. The Crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800 Gambler. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg. Org. Please play responsibly. 21 and over. Physically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only. Void in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. New customers only. Non-withdrawable Casino Spins issued as 50 spins per day for 10 days. Valid for a featured game only and expire each day after 24 hours. See terms at casino. Draftkings. Com/promos. Ends October fifth, 2025 at 11: 59 PM Eastern Time.

Okay, let's go. Hey, football guy, but Dino.

A-w-h.

Pardon, my 10. Yeah, pardon, Welcome to Part of My Take, presented by DraftKings. Download the app, use code take and claim your spins after your first five-dollar wager on the DraftKings Casino. Get in the game with DraftKings Casino, home of the largest jackpot win in online casino history. The Crown is yours. Today is Monday, September 15th, Week 2. Rumbling and stumbling and… Some spread. We start in Detroit, where Dan Campbell is looking chunky and thinking soupy, while his friend, Ben Johnson, is just trying to get his team upright and erect. The bears look good on their first drive as Rome wasn't built in a day. Odunzey scored a notable draft pick from Ryan. Rebuilds weren't done in a day or a year or four years. Polls. Everything after that was all lines, as Brock Wright, an Egyptian, scored to make it 21-7. And Ammon Ross, Saint Brown goes, Frazier, landed the knockout blow as he scored not once, not twice, but three times on the way to a 50 burger. The bears are farther away from being back than they've ever been. Lions, 52. Bears, 21. In Cincinnati, Toe Burrow went down with an injury, leaving Rex Ryan disgusted.

Toe Burrow is, ironically, Rex Ryan's best move in the bedroom, boom. I got a teach. Very good teach. The game money to watch as Jamal Chase Bank and Travis ATM both found pay dirt in a back and forth affair. They saw Putin showed signs of Russian aggression in a special Jackson military experiment, but Liam Ice Cream cone fell short of the 31 flavors of points he needed as Drake Browning is a certified cover boy, leading the bangles to a game-winning textile drive as time expired. Bangles, 31. The Jaguars, 27. In Pittsburgh, Caleb Presley Johnson is going to need a Sunday conversation with Mike Tomlin after walking away from a kickoff and giving up an easy countdown to the Seahawks. Tori Horton hears a boo after scoring, and Kenneth Brandon Walker said, Why are you hollering to the Black and Gold crowd after running through the battered Pittsburgh defense? Tough news for Joe Rogan podcast listeners, as it doesn't look like Rodgers will be going to Austin much in the future after Calvin caused an interception in the end zone that swung the game. Seattle, 31. Pittsburgh, 17. Down to New Orleans. We're making the saddle again.

We're Mac in the saddle again.

As Jones is back to being QB1, a four-year dream for Kyle Shana and realized. Luke Cracker Farrell said, It doesn't matter that we're messing fan favorites like Kittle and Purdy. That logo is still the same. Spencer Frattler hazed Alvin Kamara during rush week, handing him the ball 21 times against the Niners defense. Thank you, sir. May I have another? Loss as the Saints don't go marching. Niners 26, Saints 21. We go down to Miami now where Henry Lockwood was on the scene for the Patriots' big win.

Thanks, boom. Yes, we're down to Miami. Trizzie, Drake Bay, got the scoring scarred when he connected with fellow heel, Mac Trill-Hawlins, and had the Patriots smocking up seven.

Quishon, Quishon, Quishon, Quishon, Quishon, Quishon, Quishon, Quishon.

Boody was rocking everywhere after scoring. But unfortunately, Andre Aurora Barragolales missed P-A-T's on both touch downs because he's a horrible kicker with a bad number and an arm sleeve and an ass towel, even though he's a kicker. But I digress. In the third quarter, Malik George Washington crossed the Delaware River and could go all the way. This is a fourth quarter, not a third quarter. For a punt return, TD, to give the Dolphins a fourth quarter lead. On the ensuing kickoff, Antonio Tyrese Gibson said, Stop trying to catch me, cuh? And he could go all the way. And so could Mike Brable to the house to get the lead right back to the Patriots. Dolphins, 27.

New England, 33. That was a very European way to read the score there, Boom. Thanks, Boom.

I didn't want to say Patriots twice in a row.

All right, we're sticking the AFC East back up to the MettaLands for memes.

It meant life. Josh Allen is going to feel hungover tomorrow after taking a punch from Michael Roger Clemens, who thought Josh's nose was the ball. The Bills made sure to run CD formation for Elijah. Give me, give me more touch downs, that while James Chef Cook said, Hello there, children, as he made the Jets defense look like a Peewee football team. Joey laid both of his nuts across the Jets forehead with a sack and force fumble. And breaking news, just in. Fields might be asked each.

Oh, no.

Bills 30, Jets 10.

That's terrible news boom. We go to Indy where Shane's stipend is playing with house money as Jonathan Taylor-Ham was running the pig skin up and down the field to the tune of 165. Bo Nixalat threw some buttermilk biscuits to his receiver, and Troy Franklin Delano Roosevelt proved his legs still work, scoring and hauling in 89 yards. The Colts looked like they were fried, but they ordered seconds of Schradertots as a penalty, let him put extra mustard on it as the Colts played catch-up, winning the game as the clock expired.

Colts, 29.

The Broncos, 28. And now we go to the game of the week where Max was there in Arrowhead.

We head over to Kansas City, where it's another year of say Prawn Barkley making opposing defenses look like shrimp as he once again dominated the run game. Andrew Makuba Uba got a five-star rating after he took a pick for a ride while Travis Kelsey Swift was saying, Don't blame me. Love made me lazy after dropping a no doubt, countdown. Jalen, make you butt hurts. Had everyone crying for throwing less than 100 yards, but everyone should shut their ass up because he fucking I won the game.

Egos 20, Chief 17. Standing on the corner, Jameis Winston down the shore.

Such a fine side to see. Even dubs like they were Snickers till they ran into a kicker by the name of Brandon Aubrey. Another Dax win. This game was action. And all All the Giants fans just want Jackson.

Cowboys 40, Giants 37. And that was your fastest 2 Minutes brought to you by Chevy. Football season is here. And whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff, there's one ride that's always game ready, Chevy Silverado. The Chevy Silverado is a longtime partner, a part of my take, in our favorite truck, and it's all about grit. From job site to tailgate, Silverado lets you show up strong and tackle any task, built for hustle, ready for the game. Silverado is America's most dependable, full-size truck. For JD Power 2025 award information, visit jdpower. Com/awards. Head to chevy. Com to learn more and build your own Chevy Silverado today. Okay, week two in the books. It was a hell of a Sunday, boys. We had some crazy action. Can't stress enough how much it sucks to do the nine games early, three games late. The NFL, just figure it Figure it the fuck out. It was just too much chaos going on and then not tapering us off in a successful way.

Also knowing that we've got two games Monday night. I know. It's inexcusable.

I don't want to complain about football, but it's just a crazy... We have 12 games, just give them to us correctly. Yeah.

It's like when you leave a pet at home, you're going to eat all the food and you're going to feel bad afterwards. We're the pets. You need to make sure that we have a spaced out Sunday afternoon so we don't get full on football. We're going to be plenty full after the first day. Just give us one more game in the afternoon.

It's loading up on the wedding appetizers. Then sitting down and being like, Shit, this actually was a good dinner. Why did I eat a thousand bacon-wrapped scalops?

Sometimes it is awesome to just do an advertiser dinner?

Dude, I do that every single time. I fucking stand outside the door. I'm standing outside where they come out, so I just get it fresh right before it's untouched advertiser platter.

Yeah, that's great. Sometimes I just do a dips dinner where I get four different kinds of dips. Then that's basically the same thing as just getting too full and then not having any room for dinner, except you get way too full and you don't have a dinner.

But it didn't feel like dinner.

Yeah. All right. I pretty much skipped. I ate healthy today.

We got the Vikings and the Falcons in a field goal fest, which we will update after we do all the games. It doesn't look like the same game as we watch Bill's Raven Sunday Night Football week one.

Question, though, are we falling for the JJ McCarthy trap again? Because I think that he might have Tebo adjacent qualities about him. I don't think he's as bad as Tebo was. Obviously, he's good at times, but this is what JJ does. He gets everybody saying that he sucks, and then he starts playing really good.

And he's also got his defense playing, Ben, don't break, perfectly. That's all JJ. That's JJ McCarthy.

That's leadership. Yeah.

All right, let's get into it. Let's rip off the bandaid. Lions 52, bears 21. I want to start with the lions because I don't want to just not mention how good the lions looked because they looked so fucking good. They were everything that we thought week one. Oh, no, they're going to have problems. Their offensive line, their new coordinator, basically erased. Jared golf played perfect football. He was 23 for 28, five breakdown passes. I don't think he got sacked once. The lines had 511 yards, 52 points on 58 plays. 52 points on 58 plays. They almost scored a point of play. It's crazy. It's insane. They were doing it all. They were doing the Amon Ross-St. Brown was just feasting three touch downs, the big shot to Jamo. Everything. Everything worked for them. They ran for 177. They passed for 334. The lions looked absolutely fine, like the team that we've come to expect the last two years. That was put to rest.

Yeah. I mean, they looked unstable. Their offense looked awesome. Their defense looked pretty good, too, at times. They rubbed it in your face a little bit with that one turnover where they did the Ben Johnson celebration, where they did the fumble play, the fake fumble play that Jared Goff ran last year. They had that planned out as a celebration to use against the bears. It did feel a little bit personal. That's okay. I knew that the lines were going to win this game when Dan Campbell said, We have to win this game. He talked himself into a lather. When Dan Campbell is desperate, that's a man you don't want to fuck with. Yeah.

Listen, the lines, they kick the shit out of the bears. They're going to do a celebration. They're going to enjoy it. I'm sure it wasn't super personal because Ben Johnson and Dan Campbell said, He's still my friend. But yeah, they wanted to show that they're fine without him.

Did Dan Campbell say that or did Ben Johnson say it?

I think Dan Campbell said it before.

Okay, so confirmed both friends.

Both friends. But yeah, I'm sure there's a chip on the shoulder for the Lions guys to be like, Hey, we're not just Ben Johnson. We're a really good team otherwise.

And they proved it. It was an ass-kicking. Now, I thought that there were some things that you could take away from it if you want some takeaways, some positive takeaways.

I don't want positive takeaways. I don't want any positive takeaways.

Do you want one?

No. This team sucks. This team sucks. This organization sucks. The only Roma Dunes day was good.

Yeah, that was going to be my positive takeaway.

Caleb wasn't the main problem. Notice how I phrase that. It wasn't like he lit the world on fire, but I wouldn't say he was the main The defense has now given up 694 yards and 73 points in the last five quarters of football. That's impossible.

It's hard to do.

The main culprit is Ryan Poles, because we are now in year four of a rebuild. You guys probably didn't see this, but it was obviously big for Bear's fans and on Bear's Twitter. In this game, Ryan Paul's top 10 pick, tight-end, Colson Loveling had zero receptions. His His second-round pick, wide receiver, Luther Burden had zero receptions. His second-round offensive tackle pick was a healthy scratch. His second-round defensive tackle was a healthy scratch. It's absolutely abysmal. Year 4 of a rebuild, and they're somehow worse. After Ryan Pauls had two number one picks, obviously traded one of them, a ton of shots at it. He did the press conference when he got hired and said, We're going to take the North and give it back. He is now 3-17 versus the NFC North. 3-17 versus the NFC North. It's absolutely a joke. I feel bad for Ben Johnson because he inherited this, and he probably, $13 million is a lot of money, but he probably is looking around and being like, Fuck, this is a mess.

Just quick fact check. Luther Burden, I'm seeing that he had one reception for five yards.

Oh, he did? For five yards. Okay, so he had one reception. Great.

Yeah, Colson Loveling.

That was probably when the game lasted 17 hours. It was still going on when the Chiefs and Eagles kicked off.

The game was still going on After the Giants and the Cowboys finish. Yeah, in overtime. Pretty crazy. And they went to zero in overtime. The clock struck zero. This game was still happening. I don't know why it lasted that long. Colson Loveling, I think, is going to be a fine player.

It doesn't help that Tyler Warren looks awesome.

Yeah, he does. He looks really good.

Ryan Polls has not had a single pro-buller drafted. That's pretty crazy. That's pretty hard to do. And he's had a lot of top pitch.

I agree that Caleb Williams was not the main problem. He wasn't the main problem. He wasn't the main problem. He wasn't a solution.

The interception was really bad.

The interception was ridiculous.

Then people were like, You asked for more interceptions. I did not ask for that type of interception. I asked for the interception where he's taking a shot to hit a guy downfield, not he can just throw the ball away, and instead, he throws the ball away into the lion's hands.

I think, yeah, he was trying to throw the ball away, but then that's almost more concerning because he wasn't accurate enough to hit the sideline, the entire sideline.

No, this team is bad. I'm actually upset at myself for letting people be like, You're being too hard on them after week one. It probably wasn't hard enough. This defense is a joke. The offensive line was invested in heavily, is not good enough. Caleb Williams has not taken enough steps forward. The roster, again, we're on year four of a rebuild where you had two times you had the number one pick, and this is the output. This is how bad it is. Ryan Paul is 15 and 38 in his tenure. 15 and 38. That's insane. And he got an extension two months ago. I honestly wish the bears would just be like, who knows what Ben Johnson will be as a coach. But I would be totally down with them to be like, Hey, Ryan Pauls, you're gone. Ben Johnson, this is your roster. Trade anyone you want. Trade some of these guys before the trade deadline this year. Get as many pics as possible, and I guess just do a rebuild again. Just build the team in your image, in your mold, and Guess what? It could end up exactly at this point. But the fact that we're at this point after four years of rebuilding is an absolute joke.

I was wondering about that when they announced the Ryan Pauls extension. What did he do that made them say, Yeah, this is our guy. He's done a great job? Because ultimately, you have to be judged based on if your football team is good at playing football.

Can I tell you what I honestly think what happened was? I think that just the fact that he was able to negotiate an extension makes him a genius negotiator.

That's a good point.

I was going to say the fact- It's very meta, but him convincing George McCassie to give him more money, he was like, Holy shit, this guy's good. I was going to say- The record's not there.

The fact that he signed Ben Johnson. Yeah. A coach that you think is going to be good, that was good enough for them to say, Okay, we got the guy that we didn't think that we were going to get. We're not going to wait and see how it plays out. Good job, Ryan Paul.

Yeah, he got Ben Johnson.

He's like a headhunter. Right.

But the bear is also... It's early, so I'm going to have patience with Ben Johnson. Anyone who's like, he's a bad coach after two games, that's crazy. But they They're not. They're playing like dog shit, and they're very penalized. They had eight penalties for 50 yards today, which actually was a step in the right direction because it was 12 for 127 on Monday night football. I like Ryan Paul as a guy, but this is How can you look at this record and this roster and have this many guys that you drafted in the first three rounds not contributing? That's how this works in the NFL. When you draft guys in the first round and the second round, they have contribute right away. Otherwise, what are you doing?

It is crazy to think that on Thanksgiving last year, this game was way more competitive. Yeah. The bear should have won that game.

I think it's rotten to the core in a way because this game had a very similar vibe after the Hale Mary last year where the team quit. It felt like the team quit after halftime when the refs fucked up that spotting of the ball. Obviously, it didn't matter. The lines were going to win this game 100 times out of today, but then they score with three seconds left. It felt like the team quit. And so what's the fix for that? You're at the end of a rebuild, and now you have to clean it out again because it just doesn't feel like they have a fight.

The other thing I I would say would be a positive takeaway. Deandre Swift did not look bad when he was running the ball.

No, he ran hard. He ran hard.

At the end of the first half, I was confused by that because it seemed like their explanation... First of all, they let the Giants run a play. The Lions, yeah. Yeah, the lines. Jerry Goff hit Tesla down the sideline for another one-handed catch from the rookie that now has the two craziest first catches of all time in NFL history because he had that one-hander last week for a countdown. So he catches it on one hand, then the lions ran a play where they spiked it with what looked to be like half-second left on the clock so they could kick a field goal. Then the reps went back and reviewed the play before the spike and said, Yeah, the clock operator screwed it up, so we're going to do a 10-second runoff. You still have six seconds left. I don't understand that because after you run the play where you spike it- They screwed it up.

The ref screwed up the spotting. He didn't realize that he was down in bounds. Whatever. It doesn't matter. None of this matters.

What I was going to say is this is the second time that's happened in two weeks where they've reviewed a play that by the rule, you shouldn't be allowed to review. But ultimately, you make the right decision because you want the plays on the field to matter and be called right. The NFL just needs to They say, you can only review the last play before the next play unless the next play is a spike, because it's the second time that it's happening. Teams run up to the ball too quick and it screws everything up. So just put that in the rule book.

And I was mad in the moment because It was the difference of at halftime, it was going to be, I think it was going to be a seven-point game. So it was like, Oh, we could fight, but it doesn't fucking matter. The lines were so much better, and then the bears quit, and they stink. And I don't know. There are Four-win team at most. I don't know what... I'm happy I didn't get it. I'm happy that every time you guys prodded me trying to get more than six out of 10, I didn't go up from that because I looked through their schedule earlier. I mean, who are they going to beat?

Okay, I'll give you some wins. Cowboys at Home?

The Cowboys' offense is awesome. The Cowboys' offense is awesome. The Cowboys, if the bears play... Can I read this stat for you again? In the last five quarters, the bear has given up 694 yards and 73 points.

Okay, it's not good.

The Cowboys offense is going to light us up.

Saints at Home.

Maybe. Saints fight. The Saints actually fight where the bears don't.

At the bangles?

Commander's Revenge Game.

Jake Browning is fine.

Home against the Giants.

Giants, probably Jackson Dart will be awesome by then.

Brown's at home.

Maybe, but that might be Dylan Gabriel.

Deshawn might come back. Yeah. Okay. Nothing on- Packers at home.

No.

They haven't beaten you at home this year.

Nothing on this list makes you think like, Oh, they could... I mean, they're not a good team right now. Hopefully, Ben Johnson gets things going in the right direction. Maybe Caleb, like I said, he wasn't the major problem today. I know he's the easy scapegoat out, and he had some nice throws, and he did have the sacks and the interception, but he had a couple where he let it rip. Hopefully, he gets better and better, and then maybe they can start playing some competent football. But the defense is a joke, and it's It's crazy. The amount of resources, the amount of money that's been spent and the draft capital and everything to have this type of output is a fucking joke.

I forgot that you had the number one pick overall twice. Twice? I forgot about that.

They basically got rid of everyone and cleared the whole balance book and had nothing but cap space. It's a joke. What are you going to do? They suck. Until they start to show that they don't suck, I'm going to keep saying they suck.

Well, also, they did have the number one pick twice, but they also traded the number one pick one of those times for a pick that ended up being the future number one pick.

And more picks.

So they turned the number one overall pick into the next number one.

Again, no Pro Bowlers.

No Pro Bowlers.

No Pro Bowlers selected by Ryan Pauls through four years. That's hard to do, especially considering how many guys just make the Pro Bowl because people sit out. Ryan Pace was way better, the guy who preceded him. He put the bears in a bad spot, but he was way better of a GM through whatever, four years. It's crazy. It's crazy. So it's dark times.

It's weird because the bears are still in there. This was a rebuilding year, no matter what, because you have Ben Johnson as a first-year head coach. Caleb being on a second year makes it tough to call it a rebuilding year because this is the step forward year.

It's the fourth year of a rebuild. You can't do rebuilding forever. You eventually have to be like, Hey, you've made all these pics. You've created this roster. There has to be some accountability. It has to start showing up on the field. I didn't expect the bears to be a playoff team this year, but it had to be a step forward because you can't just say every year is a rebuilding year. It's been four years.

That's Chicago Highway for the last four years.

You know what I'm saying? You can't just say rebuilding year every year, even though they've had all these pics and all these resources.

How long is his contract for?

Who knows? I don't think they announced five years, probably. So now this will be a real test if George McCasky can stop ruffing youth soccer and maybe be like, Hey, we should just eat this contract and let Ben Johnson run the team. And again, that might end up bad, too. But at least the alternative is to just keep doing the bad thing that's been bad for four years or maybe try something new.

Maybe just have the owner be the GM like Jerry Jones.

Man, he doesn't know football. That's the problem. So, yeah, it's a disaster. And lions are good. So credit to the lions. They look like they're going to be just fine. You could tell by in the locker room, this was a meaningful win for them and the chip on the shoulder. And it also, by the transit of property, the packers might be really, really fucking good.

They could be. Yeah. I think that the NFL is just so much week to week. Packers are really good. We know that. They're a very good team. But I think the lines weren't as bad as they looked week one. No, of course not. They're not.

The bears are as bad as they look today.

And the Jared Goff is always scoring 50 points.

Yeah.

It's just in his DNA. The guy is really good at playing quarterback. Put respect on Jared Goff's name.

I agree. Yeah, he played perfect quarterbacking today. Perfect. He was just seeing Everything. Amonra is an absolute monster. Every single time he was across the middle, he would catch in just an extra 20 yards.

Did Jared apologize to you?

No, I texted him. I just said, At least my friend can benefit from the dumpster fire of this organization. He It didn't hit me back yet. I only texted him 20 minutes ago. So we'll see. I'm sure he will. He'll be like, It's not that bad, but it is.

It's pretty bad.

All right, next one. Really great game. Bangles 31, jaguars 27. It's a great game. Big story, though. Joe Burrow, toe injury out for possibly maybe the rest of the season.

So, yeah, Turf toe is one of the injuries that they should rebrand. They got a bad marketing team for Turf toe because Turf toe just cut your foot off. It's really like a bottom of the foot injury. And if your toe is fucked up, like they say that Joe Burrow's toe might be fucked up, he might be done for the entire year. It sucks for bangles fans.

It also is just another reminder that remember when Joe Burrow gave the speech about the windows always open, this is what happens. Every year in the NFL is so fleeting and so random, and it sucks a lot for Joe Burrow. I hope he's able to figure out a way to still play this year. But I think what I see, I saw three months, possibly. Dr. Dan told me that it might need surgery because it's Grade 3.

They said that he's going to consider surgery. So it's bad. Grade three would mean that it was completely torn, which means, yes, surgery. And then I saw another doctor online saying, This is season ending. It's not really three months. Three months is the most optimistic time for him. So that sucks for Bangles fans. Joe Burrow was so fun to watch. He played so good last year. I was looking forward to seeing him play again this year with maybe a better defense and seeing what they could do. That It sucks. It turns out you got a decent backup, I think. I think Jake Browning is okay.

Yeah, I loved his last drive. He also threw three picks.

There's a guy out there. There's a guy out there. He's not getting playing time anytime soon.

Are you talking about Kirk Cousins?

I could talk about Kirk Cousins. That would be one of them. But then the other is Jamis.

Oh, I thought you were talking about Colin Kaepernick.

Imagine Jamis with those weapons. Just think about it. Think about Jamis with T. Higgins, Jamis with Jamar Chase. That's That's what the people want to see. Yeah. So give the people what they want.

And Jake Browning was good on that last drive. He took the Bengals 15 play, 92 yards down three. He was like nine for 13 for 65 yards on that drive. There was a very controversial pass interference call on Travis Hunter, which was not pass interference. I think we can all agree that just wasn't pass interference. That was almost perfect defensive football. And so there's a little bit... I mean, they just fucked that up. I don't know what to say. He made a great play on the ball. That's an awesome defense. That last second didn't hold him or anything. The Jaguars got screwed.

Yeah. Also, I'm going to defend Liam Cohen for a second. Okay. He decided to go for it on fourth and 5. What was the exact scenario there, guys? Was See, they were up 3, I believe, and they went forward on fourth and 5 deep inside the Bangles territory. They didn't get it. Then the Bangles go and the Bangles win the game, and they cover. Sorry, Max. Liam Cohen, after the game, said, Annalyx, tell me 100% of the time that is the right call because you want to make them have to score a countdown, essentially. I'm going to defend them. There's nobody, I can say that I believe in Liam Cohen. But there's nobody better to make the case than when Jason Garrett gets on TV and says how strongly he disagrees with Liam Cohen's decision. He was smiling. He's like, these newfangled stats numbers guys. So happy to see them get burned this because sometimes a coach has to go with his gut. Jason Garrett absolutely loved the fact that it didn't work because Jason Garrett would not have gone for it.

So is he saying that if you kick the field goal, then you only lose by one?

He said that it was a much easier path for Jake Browning to go down the field knowing that he also could get a field goal. Got it.

Yeah. Got it.

Which makes no sense. No.

Sorry. It was a tie game.

Oh, it was a tie game, right?

No, they were down three.

No, the Jaguars were up three. So they could have made it up six. Yeah, you got to go for it. You win the game. If you get that, you win the game.

He said the only reason Jake Browning scored a countdown was because he knew that he also could have gotten a field goal. If he was driving, knowing he needed to get a countdown, it wouldn't have been as successful.

Which makes no sense. I actually think it's the reverse. When you're down six, you'd now have all four downs for the rest of the drive because you know you have to score a countdown.

Just hearing Jason Garrett talk about it was like, I know exactly what you're thinking, Jason. You would not have gone for it. That's why you're not a coach anymore.

Also, was this what are you going to say?

Trouble in Paradise?

Well, with Liam Cohen and Trevor Lawrence, there's a little back and forth that went on. I would say the real trouble in Paradise is, is Brian Thomas Jr. Okay? Because that was a weird game for him. There were so many Alligator Arms from the other day, and he does not want to get hit. One of them directly led to a interception. I think another one, I think it might have been the fourth and five when he elevator-armed another time. It feels like something's up with that.

Yeah, well, he doesn't practice hard for Pete Prisco. He did have a second half, I think last week, where he got mad at Trevor Lawrence for not getting the ball. I think they might not be on the same page. Yeah. Then by extension, now I think Trevor might be in Liam Cohen's doghouse because waived him off. They got into a little argument that was on camera on the field. Also after the game last week, Liam Cohen said not nice things about Trevor Lawrence. Yeah. He said, what do you say? He didn't have a great third quarter. We need to be more accurate. I like that from Cohen, though, using the term we. We need to be more accurate at throwing the football. All of us.

It's both them together. Brian Thomas Jr. Had eight of Trevor Lawrence as 18 incompletions were targets to Brian Thomas Jr. I don't know what it is, but if you watch some of this game and you saw some of the plays, I don't think he wants to get hit. I know some people were like, Well, there's been hospital passes to him. I get it, but some of these drops and some of these plays, the interception was bad. Basically, you could see it. It hit his hands, and he felt someone coming after him, and he basically bailed on the entire play at the last second. Like, slowed. It It went right into a bengal's player's hands.

Yeah, it's not good. There's going to be some fallout. I don't know. Liam Cohen's got his work cut out for him.

I have a weird Jake Browning staff for you, too, that might be ominous for the Jaguars. If you remember, two years ago, I believe it was. Yeah, two years ago, the Jaguars were eight and three, feeling Good, Monday Night Football. Jake Browning beat them in overtime. From that moment on, the Jaguars have gone 5: 18. Then you had this year, they win the opening week. They're feeling good. Liam Cohn, Jake Browning beats them. The Jaguars might be in a freefall again just because of Jake Browning.

Because of Browning. Yeah.

He basically started the last freefall.

Remember that game for many, many reasons, including some of the camera angles that they used for that one. The Bangles, however, they're 2-0. That's the first time since 2018 that they've been 2-0. It feels like this is a week that they do make a move, You're going to try to get someone? Kirk Cousins might not be a bad option.

Jake Browning isn't bad. He's also an AWL.

Yeah. Well, I think they're kidding themselves if they think that they have a chance to win playoff games with Jake Browning.

Yeah, but Joe Burrow might be back.

Joe Burrow? I don't know. He's getting a second opinion. He could be bad. He needs to go to a really shitty doctor to get the second opinion.

They also have a really hard schedule coming up. They play at the Vikings, at the Broncos, Lyons, Packers.

I think they're going to- That's tough. I think they're going to try to make a move.

Jameis would be so Much fun. By the way, shout out Jamar Chase. He is just the best. 14 catches 158 yards in a countdown. That's like, Hey, we could maybe win with Jake Browning because we have Jamar Chase and Tee Higgins.

Well, it's going to be just throw the ball to Jamar. Jake, this is how you do it. If you want a chance, just force feed Jamar like a foie gras goose, and let's see what the offense can do. I like the idea of saying, Chilling with Harambe, Jameis Winston, Cincinnati. I do, too. That's close enough.

Oh, I should also say, I think pound for pound, my favorite play in football, the funiest play possible in football, is when a quarterback runs so far past the line of scrimage and still throws it. Trevor Lawrence had one today. It was like five yards past.

It was so funny. Then when they look around like, What? What did I do?

It's so, so funny. It's my favorite thing. Also, this game had a green dildo thrown onto the field, and the refs thought that it was a flag. For the graphics? For the graphics, there was a flag. They put up the flag right away. It was a perfectly timed dildo toss right after a countdown.

I would support having a green dildo icon that pops up on the screen. Yeah, that'd be nice. It happens enough so that way the people at home know exactly what it was. We don't think it was a flag.

What happens if a green dildo gets thrown in a Nickelodeon game.

Slime. You get slime. Oh, no, that was just slime. If you hit somebody, you get slim. That was just slime. Do I hope that happens or do I hope that doesn't happen?

Well, it's a regular NFL game, so it's not like any different. They probably would just ignore it.

Yeah, they probably will have a protocol.

They probably will have a situation.

It's probably on a three-second delay. Yeah. Just in case something weird. If there's a fight, what are they going to do in the Nickelodeon game? If the Green Dildo, they go to fight protocol.

They got to make sure they have something to talk about. Spungebob comes and picks it up with a stinky bubble. Is that SpungeBob? Stinky Bubble? Yeah, credit to the bangles, though, but terrible news for the bangles. This was a, We're 2-0, but holy shit, not again. Because it sucks. Two times in the last three years, the Joe Burrow is going to miss a significant amount of time.

Yeah, it's a bummer. Kirk Cousins would make a lot of sense.

Kirk Cousins would make sense. Jameis would be so much fun.

You're right. Kirk Cousins, if you're thinking about who to settle down with as opposed to who to have a fun time with, Kirk Cousins makes sense to settle down, although he'd look weird in that helmet. I don't know how that would end up working.

Jameis with these receivers, though. He might go 5,000 yards, even if he showed up week three.

I think if Jameis-50. If Jameis Winston joins the bangles. Mark this down. He's going to break what's his name, Norm Van Brockland, his single-game passing record, which has stood since the '50s, which is only like 550. That's a lot of yards, 550 yards. But still shocking to me that that hasn't been broken since then. Yeah.

Okay. Speaking of, we had the game of the early slate, the Cowboys, Giants, Cowboys 40, Giants, 37. Russell Wilson heard all the noise because Russell Wilson was two yards shy high of his career high, 450 yards, 30 for 41, deep ball magic, three touch downs, and then a really bad interception in overtime to cost him.

It's because his Moonball is just so catchable. It is. Even for defensive backs, sometimes. If If I were to ask you who the two league leaders and passing yards are, who would you guess?

Russell Wilson.

Yes, he's number one.

Joe Flacko.

Daniel Jones.

Oh, okay.

Two of the Giants. Two of the Giants. Russell Wilson leads the league in passing yards right now. He did look good today when he was mailing it out. I thought Jackson Dart looked pretty good, too.

For his one or two plays?

Yeah, for his one or two plays.

He had some great handoffs.

One carry for negative three yards from Jackson Dart.

There we go. The handoffs were there.

Malik Nabors was sensational. This game was so much fun. There was 41 points scored in the fourth quarter. 41 points scored in the fourth quarter. It was Brandon Aubrey, who's an absolute stud. I know we had this discussion. I think we mentioned his name when we talked about the best kicker in football, it being Boswell. Then we said maybe also Aubrey. Aubrey, I think, is the best kicker because 64-yarder at the end of regulation, it looked so easy for him. It looked so easy. It was good. It had distance for another 10 yards easily.

Yeah, it would have been good from 70. It was crazy. It was an awesome kick. He just doesn't miss. If you were to do a redraft of players, and let's take all the quarterbacks out of it, how high would Brandon Aubrey go?

Ryan Pols would take him in the first round. Take him 1-1.

Everyone is a free agent. I think you could make a case he could be a first-round pick.

No, not even close.

I appreciate it because he is awesome. I'm talking non-quarterbacks.

I know exactly what you said.

Because he won this game.

I know exactly what you said.

He literally won this game. No chance. For the Dallas Cowboys.

No chance, VFT. Listen, Brandon Aubrey is awesome. Yeah. That is a crazy statement. Think about the offensive and defensive line. They would just be a run on the best guys.

Okay, I'll say this. If you took a quarterback or How many more positions are we getting to raise?

If you just drafted specialists, he would be one overall.

Of course. It's not even close. Not even close. I don't think it's crazy to say that if he entered the NFL draft next year, if somehow he reclassified back and he wasn't in the NFL, was eligible to be drafted, there would be a team that would take him in the second round.

I don't know. Yes.

A hundred %, there would be a team that would take him in the second round.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, he's a really good kicker, but I still think teams would probably still take linemen first, guys like that.

I'm saying- You build your franchise. I'm saying he is so much better than any other kicker in the NFL. It's crazy.

I mean, he's... I mean, Boswell is really fucking good.

Boswell is really good.

I don't know if the difference between Aubrey and Boswell is significant enough that he would be, no doubt, second rounder.

Look up and see what are Boswell's stats from 50 plus? Because Aubrey's stats from 50 plus are nuts. Yeah, he's been awesome. I think he's like 80% from 50 yards plus.

Yeah, he's been awesome. I mean, maybe he goes second round, but yeah, he would definitely not be a first rounder if you drafted the entire NFL without quarterbacks.

There's just no way. Who'd you take in the first round?

Every single edge rusher and left tackle.

Jelen Hertz.

Oh, because he's not a quarterback. I like that. Max, you like that?

We'll get to that. Just say we won the game.

Max, do you like that?

I think Boswell is also very good from 50 plus.

He is. Yeah, he's very good from 50 plus.

According to AI, he's 43 of his last 52 attempts from 50 plus.

That's really good. Yeah, no, Aubrey just makes it look easy. That's the thing, too. It doesn't look like he's trying really hard when he kicks.

Yeah, I think he's also got a stronger leg. But also with the Giants, they're very frustrating because they should have won this game. Oh, yeah. They definitely should have won this game. They had 160 yards of penalties, 14 penalties for 160 yards.

Now, I think 60 of them were on the same play and player, but yeah.

Okay.

They also- James Hudson was penalized four times on one possession. He had 40 yards of penalties on one possession.

Was that the offensive lineman that sat down? Yeah. He had the funniest play of the day by far. His right slap, it was like a bitch slap that he put on the defensive end, just wound up and whacked the fuck out of the side of his face. And then he got upset for being penalized. I wish that play was legal. Deacon Jones used to do it as a defensive end for a long time. But it was just straight up a punch that he gave. Watch this. Boom.

He smashed him. Absolutely smashed him. Do you think there's... By the way, Dak Prescott, that was his 14th straight win against the Giants. That's the second longest record against one single win record against one single opponent. Bob Greasey, number one. Bob Greasey had 17 wins against the Bills from 1968 to 1979. Tom braided had 13 straight wins versus the Bills from 2003 to 2010. So Dak Prescott, 14 straight. That's crazy. He just He beats the Giants every single time.

I love watching Cam Skatebu play. Yeah. He's going to be a good NFL player. Wrecking ball. It's so fun. He loves contact, runs into people, just throws his body around, and he's so much bigger and stronger than a lot of the guys that are trying to tackle him. They need to give him more touches. Yeah.

Do you guys think Jerry Jones had any second thoughts about Michael Parsons through two games, considering the fact the Cowboys' offense is very good? It looks explosive.

The Giants only had 84 yards rushing today, Big Cat.

Oh, okay. So they stopped the run. They stopped the run. They stopped the run. Yes. They stopped the run. I know the Cowboys do have some injuries on defense, but still.

And they signed Clowny.

They did sign Clowny, so help on the way. Their offense is awesome, and they're just going to be in these shootout games, and Micah Parsons might have been able to help.

Maybe. Maybe. That remains to be seen. Yeah.

But it will be very funny if without Michael Parsons, the Cowboys get to the NFC Championship game and lose in a shootout to the packers because they don't have Michael Parsons. That would be very funny. It's like, Jerry, you've been searching for this Super Bowl appearance for the last 30 years, and you literally traded them away right before the season started.

I agree. That'd be very funny.

I don't think the Cowboys are that good, but still, their offense is like, they have a ton of guys that are contributing, and their run game looks good, and Dak looks healthy.

Max, I got a question for you as a fellow NFC East guy. Yep. I know we were Both rooting for a tie. That would have been the best outcome for us. But with Micah Parsons being trade to the packers, could you make the argument that that was actually worse for us than it was having him in the division and having to play him twice a year?

I said this to you on Thursday night. I was like, It's bullshit that Dak Prescott finally gets traded away from the division and then you play him. Micah Parsons. Micah Parsons gets trade away from the division. You have to play him before you would have had to play him on the Cowboys.

I'm not even talking about that. I'm just saying for a team like the Eagles and maybe next year for the commanders that's thinking soupy, you're probably going to have to go through the Green Bay packers to get there, right? Next year, soupy? To have Michael... Next year. Next year. I said next year.

No, I know. That was a funny slip in.

Said next year. But then you have to worry about the packers more because they're way more of a present threat than the Cowboys to beat you in the playoffs. Having him is actually... That's bad. I wish that the Cowboys hadn't done that.

That's advanced planning by No, I agree with that take.

It's realistic. I agree with that take. Right now, I think- He's soupy, dude.

Yeah.

Right now, I think I would prefer Michael Parsons on the cowboys than the packers.

I would, too.

Yeah.

Jerry Jones fucked the entire division over. Yeah. That's probably why he did it, the conference What do you mean? Well, the division.

Oh, the division, but the conference especially. But especially the- Well, no, the division helped you. The division, he helped you. The conference, he hurt you.

He really fucked over the NFC North.

He fucked over everyone.

Yeah, Jerry Jones fucked everything up.

He should have just sent him to the AFC.

That's bullshit. I agree.

Yeah.

You almost went to Jets. Did you see that report, Mims?

Yeah, it would have been a shit trade for the Jets, but...

They wanted Quinn and Williams.

Quinn and Williams in two first-round pics? So if the Jets traded that, the Cowboys would be picking top five.

Yeah, and the Jets said no.

The Jets said no. We don't have the facilities for that.

I'd say good job to the Jets. They don't have the facilities.

Don't have the facilities.

Last thing, Brandon Aubrey was the... Oh, Dak Prescott. Did you see he said that he's like a closer and he needs a walkout song, which would be sick? Yeah. A kicker having a walkout song would be awesome.

What should Aubrey have? I don't know. Kendrick?

That would be very funny. Yeah. Brandon Aubrey is awesome. This was the sneaky the game of the day, which I don't think anyone expected going into it because Russell Wilson, it was perfectly timed by Russ. He heard all the noise. He's like, I'm just going to chuck it up to Malik Nabors. Malik Nabors is an absolute stud, which that part is fun for Giants fans that they have. I don't know where the Giants... I thought the Giants defense was going to be a lot better than it has been through two games.

Because you would think on paper with that defensive line that was so good last year, they could do it again.

But very fun game. Very fun game. All right. Game time, by the way. Hey, can you look up tickets for tonight? Maybe the- Gaga? Texans versus the Bucaneers. The NFL's back tailgates, pack stands that buzz before kickoff, but getting in nightmare. Cues, price jumps, getting logged out mid-click. All you want is to be there, beer in hand, losing your voice with the crowd. The Game Time app gives the advantage back to the fans. It's the hack for unlocking amazing tickets and experiences in a few taps. It's incredibly easy to use, and the game time guarantee. It means you can trust you'll get 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus, fees are always included. So what you see is what you pay. Looking for tickets for Texans versus the Bucks tonight.

Yeah, Texans Bucks NRG. You can get in for cheap $59 I'm seeing right now on the Game Time app.

Okay, Monday night, the first of the double headers. So take the guesser guide of buying NFL tickets with Game Time. Download the Game Time app. Create an account. Use code PMT for $20 off for first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account. Redeem code PMT for $20 off. Swipe, tap, ticket. Download the Game Time app today. All right, 49ers 26, Saints 21. We told you on Friday, this is going to be Kyle Shanahan getting to prove that Mac Jones was always the guy. It started rough for Mac Jones. He had a couple of really bad passes to start, and then he did well. He had three touch downs. He ran the offense well. Maybe Mac Jones is the guy, and Kyle Shanahern was correct.

I thought that this game was more competitive. This is twice that the Saints have done this to me, where they've played teams tough. They are a tough team. I think that's probably on me for going to the season just thinking that the Saints were going to give up on playing football and not really be competitive at all. Turns out that's very hard to do when you have professional football players in your team. I've been pleasantly surprised with how the Saints have been playing and at least making interesting games for everybody. But yeah, Mac Jones looked pretty good. Christian McAfree looked okay. The Luke Farrell guy that they got at tight end, he does a great job being the margarine to George Kittle's butter. It's like, Yeah, I wish I had Kittle, but this guy, I guess he'll do.

Yeah, If you're walking in an airport on an NFL Sunday and you see a TV 100 feet away and you see Luke Farrell scoring a countdown, you could maybe convince yourself that was Kittle.

If you're drunk enough, you think that that's Kittle, which everybody in New Orleans was. Yeah.

No, the Saints, they fight. They're fighting for Kellen Moore. This is a team, they had the ball down five with a couple of minutes left trying to score. They ran out of time and didn't convert a fourth down. But They fight. What do you guys think was going through Kyle Shanehan's head when Eddie Piniero missed his first P-A-T?

I hate kickers. Fuck every kicker.

He then ended up making the rest of his P-A-T's and two field goals. So good move because that would have definitely been at least one Jake Moody miss in a very tight game. But it was very funny that the very first P-A-T he missed.

Credit to Kyle Shanahan for sending Matt onto the field to attempt field goals after that missed extra point. Yes. Because he just might have been done with kickers for forever at that point. Kyle, he's probably relieved. They're going to win a game or two because they have a competent kicker as opposed to Moody, who was just stinking it up. My condolence, this big cat. That's a Ryan Polls move.

Yeah, Ryan Polls. He's like, Hey, we got a third-round draft pick or whatever mood he was, which is way too high. Now we have a third-round draft pick kicker and a fourth-round draft pick punter. Pretty good. Wow. It's basically like you're the GM.

Yeah, which is not what you want. Not What you want.

Yeah, I'm impressed with the Saints at least fighting. I know that sounds like loser talk, but like, Spencer Rattler, he's okay. He's running the offense in an okay way. He played pretty good today. It's like they're not a very good team. They're in a weird middle phase as a franchise, and they're at least fighting early on in the football season.

I think he's a very, very serviceable bridge quarterback. Yeah. He's a good guy to put... He's not going to ruin the confidence of any of your other players while he's the starter for a single season.

As long as he doesn't get Chris Alavi hurt.

That's true. Yeah. Which he didn't today.

Yeah, he did not. The 49ers might be back because 2-0 start after last year's debacle, and they're 2-0, and they've already gotten a ton of injuries that most seem like guys will come back. So credit to 49ers. Got to feel good starting 2-0. They got to play the Cardinals next week, but who have problems of their own, which we'll get to.

I feel like Shanaher likes to put just a little bit of fear into the NFL fan bases out there by just saying, Hey, Christian McCaffrey, he was limping around. We're going to hold him out of practice today. Just to make us all nervous.

Just make fantasy people... It's actually smart by Kyle Shanaher. It's like He can shine a light on how ridiculous we all act as sports betters and fantasy football players by just saying, Christian McCafrey didn't go through all practice and watching a bunch of grown men freak out online mind. Yeah. He pulls a mirror up to our idiocy.

I think Cal Shana just hates nerds because he hates kickers and he hates people that play fancy football.

And he is a nerd a little bit.

And he is a little bit of a nerd. He hates himself. A self-loathing nerd. Yeah.

Zack, did you have anything on this game? I like, by the way, Zack and Mims just sitting here, just the two of them. They don't hate each other.

This game is scored a lot more points than I thought it was going to be scored. It was fun to watch.

Nice. Yeah, so that's the thing.

I just wanted to get you involved a little bit there, Zack, because I realized with the Bucks playing Monday Night Football, there's a chance you might not talk till who's back. That's completely understandable. I felt a little bad looking over there being like, he's just going to sit here and listen to us podcast for two hours.

I bet the Under on every single early game today. Oh, no. That was a bad mistake.

That was what happened last week. That was what happened this week.

Well, here's what I thought. When I went to bed last night, I was thinking to myself, all right, the Under's just absolutely killed last week. Now everyone's going to think that the Overs are going to hit because the opposite is going to happen. So I'm going to fade the people that are fading the trend. You checkmated yourself. I checkmated myself and lost a lot of money. That's brutal. On taking every single under this morning. Yeah, that's brutal.

This one actually hit, though. Here's There we go. Next one. The one that hit. Bills 30, Jets 10. What? What's that look?

You said the over hit?

No, the under.

It's the only under. Yeah, the under. This is a big winner.

It was the only under in the morning.

This was my under of the week. Yeah. And it hit.

Bills 30, Jets 10. I want to know. No hangover for the Bills. They didn't even play great. Josh Allen wasn't Superman Josh Allen. That James Cook run was incredible.

It was an amazing run. Although Josh was Superman, he got hit in the face, maybe broke his nose and was bleeding everywhere. It looked like he was excited to meet Josh Allen. Yep, on MVP night. Yeah, he knows beers. We know that. And then that was a play where he had the ball, I think it was a couple plays after he got taken out with the broken nose, the bloody nose. And he had a play where he ran down the sidelines and thought about trying to jump over two people, and he didn't press all the buttons. And old Josh would have. And then he was smiling. He's like, Yeah, I made the right call there. I learned. I figured out that I don't always have to do that.

Memes, does Aaron Glenn cut Michael Clemens for that penalty? Because it would be very funny if Aaron Glenn just cut whoever makes the biggest mistake every single week and then ends up with half roster by the end of the year.

I think they might, but he's another one of those guys that if accountability was the thing, he wouldn't be on the roster because he made all those mistakes last year. Then you think you got to stop on defense, and then all of a sudden it's like, Oh, penalty on Michael Clemens. Now, it did look like a flop on Josh Allen.

His nose got battered.

No, on the unnecessary roughness.

Oh, on the other play. To start the game.

But he did punch Josh Allen in the face.

Yeah, because the unnecessary roughness, that was like a third 17. Basically, just don't do anything stupid, get off the field. Then the Bills were off and running. Like I said, it wasn't like a last Sunday night where Josh Allen was just lighting up and passing all over the place. I I think he... What did he end up with? A 170 yards or something? But they did spread the ball. I think 10 guys had a carrier catch. The Bill's defense is really what it was because they got ran on by the Ravens and gave up 40 points. Then they came into MetLife, and they completely shut down the Jets rushing attack. The Jets, outside of garbage time, had 18 carries for 76 yards. They never got going. They basically were like, Justin Fields, we dare you to throw. And guess what? They won that dare.

That was a good dare to make him. Really good dare. 3, 4, 11 today. And then Tarad came in. Do we know how long Justin is going to be out for?

He had a concussion. We don't yet. He might have a concussion.

So where are we at?

Well, we got both ends of the spectrum from last week to this week for the offense. Defense played a little okay.

The defense played a little okay?

A little okay. They were on the field the entire time.

And James Cook run was- The offense could do anything. James Cook, his run that opened it up was insane.

Yeah, at that point, it was just like the jet stink. I don't even know what we're doing. Some teams are competing for a Super Bowl. Other teams are just playing dress-up on Sunday.

How are you feeling about Justin Fields?

Not great. You knew that it was going to be a long day from the first throw when he airmailed Garrett Wilson, and then it was just over.

Yeah.

This was definitely the worst stadium trip that you could have for any home fan base this week.

Yeah, and apparently, it was Justin Fields' worst game ever throwing.

Ever. But it's his best offensive line.

It is. Guys were open. He just wasn't throwing it.

He also had almost 50 yards rushing memes. Don't forget that.

Yeah, he had one okay run. He had one long run. Then he missed two wide-open guys, back-to-back throws.

How are we, Memes, me and you? Memes and I had a little bit of a duke to do.

What happened?

Well, we do this every year right around now, where we basically are fighting with each other because both our teams stink. I accused him because I saw that he tweeted a graphic being like, 'Bears are eliminated from the playoffs. I was like, Where's the Jets graphic? He did tweet the Jets graphic a few 20 minutes after that.

Yeah, but every time he looked at the bears game, it was just the lines just- You guys were getting killed.

You had a quarterback who threw three for 11 for 27 yards. Again, you're taking sloppy seconds from us.

Yeah, but that's fine. No, that's way worse. We're supposed to suck.

When you say the bears suck, what does that say about you that you took our sloppy seconds?

But the Jets are supposed to suck this year. You guys have a slight expectation. We put out a graphic for best record on the show. I was in quadruple digits, and nobody else was even touching that.

It means you're saying that You engineered your team to stink, and you did so by taking a bear as quarterback. Correct.

Got it. Even though that's not what you said all offseason.

You cried when he got a little foot injury.

You called us racist.

He shoved his toe You yelled at me. You almost left the show.

Listen, Memes, we did hash it out. Memes and I hashed it out. We agreed that we have to remind ourselves that we're in this together, the two of us. We're the winless teams on PM MT right now, and we have to stay together, Memes. We have to have each other's backs. Did I go and do an accounting of how many times you treated about the bears versus how many times you treated about the jets? Yes. Was it more bears than jets? Yes. But we're in this together.

The The Bears was a more memeable game.

That's true. That is true. More eyeballs on it.

More eyeballs.

Offensive coordinator going against the whole team.

Yeah, that is true.

Said he had plays that he had called in the offseason that he was going to run today.

Oh, The bears had a great first play.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was a good script.

Okay, so we're good, though.

Yeah, we're good. Our teams both suck. We're good. We both suck.

What do you think about Aaron Glenn?

And maybe you'll get Caleb Williams in a year or two.

What do you think about Aaron Glenn's statement after the game? That was just like, We're killing ourselves.

Yeah, that was his- Is that memeable? That was his warm welcome to the Jets.

Would you say that's a memeable thing that he said?

Yeah, I tweeted about it.

Did you meme it? I'm beginning to see Big Cat's point here. To Memes' defense- His coach literally said, We're killing ourselves. And then Memes did not use that. You did not deploy that as a meme.

I did.

So Memes' defense, what?

The graphic of the bear's elimination got 27,000 likes. Of course it did. The graphic of the Jets one got four.

Listen, I'm not arguing of which team is I'm not here to laugh at right now. I'm just asking for fair and balanced from Memes when he runs a PMT account. All I needed was the Jets eliminated as well because we're in this together. We have to stick together.

That's fair. But if we're numbers-based, the bears can't get more.

Of course, they do. They're way easier to laugh at, which is actually, you should be upset about that because that used to be the Jets' mantle. You lost it. The opposite of love is not hate, it's apathy.

Yeah, we're so bad, you can't even laugh anymore.

It's like they're so bad. Yeah, so maybe that's what it is. Maybe it's like you're mad that the bears have taken the laughing stock mantle.

That could be it.

Either way, it was just very funny for me to just standing in the studio around 4: 00 today, having a real disagreement, and then coming to the terms of like, We both suck. We just got to stick together. Zack, you watched it. What did you think? How pathetic was it?

It was very funny. I'll be in full transparency.

It was good. But it felt pathetic. Did you feel pathetic, Memes? Because I felt pathetic.

We're arguing over who's worse.

Now that Memes has the part of my take timeline pulled up, there is one thing from the Lion's Bear's game that we didn't discuss. Oh, yeah. We should bring up. Yeah. Amunra, St. Brown, scored a shutdown. He does the celebration where he grabs his ham string. Hank freaked out. Hank thought that he pulled his ham string. He goes, Oh, fuck. He goes, Oh, no. You've never seen that before, Hank.

I said, Oh, no. Jared Goff looked like he got fooled by it, too.

No. No, he came to celebrate with his buddy. Yeah.

I just said, Oh, no.

First day watching Paul.

I mean, that's not what you want to see.

That's true.

Well, actually, it is. It was a touch- You fucking cry every time Jane Daniels moves outside of the pocket.

Shut the fuck up. I do. I've never once been like, Oh, my God, I'm going to fall in for a fake-Oh, get down, get down, get down. Oh, my God. I've never fallen for a fake-Get down. After he scores a shutdown, I'm not like, Oh, my God, is his ham string okay?

If he went down like that, you would literally have a heart attack.

That's probably.

Well, I care way more about Jaden Daniels than you do about, I'm I didn't.

And freak out. I literally just said, Oh, no.

You freaked out a little bit.

No, I said, Oh, no.

That's been a thing for three years.

He did it. He sold it well.

Yeah. Okay, we're good. Memes. We both suck.

Yeah, we're good. We're good.

We're good. It actually never got to... Sometimes, Memes does the thing where he balls his fist and you're like, Oh, no. We never even got to that. We were just having a nice, polite disagreement and then came to the conclusion that we both suck and are pathetic, and we're good with that.

Well, Big Cat strolled in with a lacrosse stick on his shoulder. Like he's about to hit me with it.

It's true. I don't know why I had a lacrosse.

He was like, We need to talk. I was just like, What do I do? He was like, You two of the bears are eliminated from the play.

I was like, Where's the Jets one? He's like, I did it. And Zack was just sitting there. It had to have been the most pathetic conversation that happened this afternoon.

Easily. I was just aware there was going to be that much division in week two. I was like, Well, this is week two. Week 14 is going to be- No, because this is exactly when Memes and I do it every year.

It's right around now.

I think it's a little early.

You think it's early?

I think we both suck. The bears were good last year. The Jets were decent to start.

Oh, yeah. They were decent to start.

Jets were decent to start. I think week five or six- Whenever the pats beat the jets.

It's usually, yeah. You're right. It's a little bit later, but this year, I think this is the appropriate time for it.

Yeah, it's right around that time.

Yeah, it's right. It needed to be said. We needed to have the conversation. We'll be good for the rest of the season. Just being like, Yeah, we both signed.

I will say the last thing on the Jets. Sean Payton lost 70 to 20 to the Dolphins his first year. There's those positives. You need a year to set the culture for your team. You have to flush the turds. You have to get rid of every single negative player out of the building. You got to get your guys in. It's unfortunate. You're going to suck for a while. You got to bear the process instead of just being like, Oh, we fuck it. We're terrible. I want to watch a Super Bowl team. That's just not going to happen.

You're right, because that's how bad teams stay bad, is if they do freak out and then they make another change. Yeah.

You just got to realize We're going to suck.

That's where we're different in that you're not at the end of a four-year rebuild. You're at the start of a rebuild. That's exciting.

Tony Romo said on the broadcast that it was like watching Alabama versus Middle Tennessee State, that the bills just have so many more guys that are good. It's just not competitive right now. But I do think we'll beat the bad teams. We're a bad team, but I think we're better than the worst.

You might be one of the best bad teams. Yeah.

How many wins right now?

Five. How many bad teams are there that you're better than?

That's a good question. After today's game, I would say zero. But if you go based off the Pittsburgh game, who they look terrible.

Because Pittsburgh could be a bad team.

They could be bad.

Are you better than the Dolphins?

I think we're better than the Dolphins. We'll find out in two weeks. That's Monday Night Football.

I think you're better than the Panthers.

Yeah, we could beat the Panthers.

Are you better than the Saints?

Right now, no.

Are you better than the bears?

Yes. We don't play, but yes. Right now, power rank. Although we played the same week one, week two. Like close game than non-competitive game.

I give it to the bears.

Okay. Although Justin Fields would have his chip on his shoulder. Yeah. That would be big. That would be big. And you would have a chip on your shoulder because you'd get to rub it in my face. That would also be big. That would be fun. All right, next game. Seahawks, 31, Stealers, 17. Yeah, the Stealers might be bad. So this game did change on two plays. One was the pick in the end zone to where Calvin Austin, I think, ran the wrong route, basically hit the ball, tipped drill.

It was a pass to Freyermouth. Calvin Austin reached out, deflected it up, interception.

He's like, I got this. Then the other one was one of the dumbest plays ever. It was Caleb Johnson walking away from a ball that landed in the landing zone, and then the Seahawks jumping on it in the end zone and scoring a countdown. That was basically the game right there. It reminded me of because of the new rule rules of kick-offs and everything. It reminded me of, remember the Plaxco play when he stood up and dropped the ball, and then everyone learned to not do that? Caleb Johnson had to die for everyone else to learn to never do this because the way he walked away from that ball, he never in a million years thought it was a live ball.

Every special team's coach is like, Thank God that happened to a different team and not to us. Danny Smith, the biggest gum chewer, he makes Pete Carroll look like he's never put anything in his mouth. Danny Smith is always chewing a fat what a gum. Him not knowing that rule, I think, is worse than what Caleb Johnson did. As a special teams coach, say what you want about Belichick. Belichick would have studied every single rule about the kickoff and then had an hour long meeting with everybody on special teams being like, This is the rule. This is what you can do. This is what you can't do. That, to me, was more on the coach than it was on the player.

Because he could have told him.

He might have told him. If he did tell him, then yes, it's on the player. But Caleb Johnson didn't act like he had ever heard that.

He walked away from it so nonchalantly.

The game changed entirely on that. Yeah, it went from- The stealers have to press.

The Seahawks were up three, and then they went up 10, just like that on back-to-back plays. It was pretty crazy. The stealers are... I don't know if the Stealers are good.

I have a take, Big Cat.

Okay.

I think the Stealers are better when they have a shitty quarterback. Aaron Rodgers didn't play that well today. I want to say that. I mean, he should have had that touch down to Pat, but I think that they're better when their defense knows that they have to be impregnable.

I think they can just give it a little time because I think Aaron Rodgers might not be good anymore.

You don't think so?

No. Under pressure, he was a disaster.

He was bad today.

He was on passes over 10 yards today. He had a 22% completion percentage, 42 yards, and one interception. He might It might be over.

I think they win that game with Mason Rudolf. Why? Because of defense. My entire take is, right now, the Steelers didn't really make any drastic changes on defense besides bringing in Jalen Ramsey, which should make your defense better. Joey Porter didn't play today, but they're not playing at all like they were last year on defense.

They did have a lot of injuries in this game, but still, it's two games where they've gotten... It doesn't look like the Steelers, the way that they got ran on. Kenneth Walker, he only touched the ball 13 times. He had 105 yards.

Yeah, it's like, just because you have the uniform, I always expect that the uniforms are just going to make you a good defensive player if you play in Pittsburgh. Correct. But that's not really a great strategy. It's like saying, play going to get louder. That'll make us better on defense. If they have a shitty quarterback, I feel like they're more competitive on defense. Yeah. Might be a dumb take, but knowing that you can't give up any points.

I don't hate the take. I think they just got to wait a little bit because I don't know. I don't know if the Steelers are good. They started 1-0. Obviously, they lost today. The Seahawks defense is good. Had them in clamps in the second half. I don't know if the Steelers are good.

There also might be a little, maybe, some trouble brewing between Aaron Rodgers and Mike Tomlin. Oh, do tell. Well, Aaron Rodgers, he keeps trying to tell Mike we're going to go for it on fourth down. Then Mike Tomlin is like, No, Aaron, I don't go for it on fourth down. That's not in my DNA. Then Aaron Rodgers is like, Fuck, okay. But he's used to winning all those arguments with his coaches.

Yeah, but he doesn't realize that Mike Tomlin is like, Hey, I don't know if you know, but I've been here for a long time, and what we do is we punt. We're in the middle of the field, and it's fourth and one, we punt.

This is how I have a 600 winning percentage. Yeah, we punt. We're going to punt. It was fourth and one. It was pretty much midfield, I think, at the 48-yard line, and it was tied 14-14. Aaron Roger is like, No, let's just get a first down. Mike Tomlin is like, No, we're going to punt. And Aaron exasperated. Yeah.

Listen, I don't know. We'll find out, I guess, if the Steelers are good in the next couple of weeks because I think they play at the Patriots. That'll be a good test of whether they're good. Then they play at home against the Vikings. That will be a good test. They start one and three. I think they're not a good team. Russell Wilson looked really good today. I don't know if Aaron Rodgers still has what Russell Wilson did, which is crazy to say.

Over the course of a season?

Maybe.

Maybe, but- This is a great game from Russ. Don't get me wrong. Yeah.

No, I'm just saying I don't know where that came from, Russ. It wasn't last year, but- Or last week.

Yeah.

But the deep ball is still there for Russ. Aaron Rodgers couldn't throw the ball down the field.

Aaron Rodgers looked way better today than Russ looked in week one.

Yes, I would agree with that.

In their bad games. I would agree with that. But in their good games, Russ looked better than Aaron Rodgers.

And that interception in the end zone was not Aaron Rodgers' fault. Correct. That was not his fault at all. And then the Seahawks. I do think the Seahawks have a very good defense. Their offense will hopefully come along and look good today because the Sealers' defense would look bad. But yeah, I think Mike McDonald's got them going in the right direction thing.

We have two Mike and Mike matchups today. We did. Vrabel and McDaniel and Tomlin and McDonald. Yeah.

Crazy. It's too bad we lost Mike McCarthy. We had five Mike's.

Five Mikes.

Five Mikes. The Seahawks are going to be one of those teams. I feel like if they... They're going to be there, they play a good style of football. Even that week one game where they couldn't do anything offensively, they stayed in it by playing good defense.

Cooper Cups still alive. Cooper Cups still alive. Yeah.

Still alive. Oh, that's my computer making noise. Hank, speaking of Mike's, the other Mike matchup, Patriots 33, Dolphins 27. How are you feeling? Got to win.

Got to win. Wasn't pretty. Defense is really bad.

Drake may look great.

Drake may It did look great. The offense looked good. Stefan Diggs showed up a little bit. I love Mike Vraber running down the sidelines on the kick return.

Yeah, you'd see Stefan Diggs call him slow?

Yeah, that's funny. That's just good old-fashioned locker room stuff.

Two finally lost the Patriots. Yeah.

But their defense looked bad. The Dolphins, I don't think, are good, and it was an absolute grind to win that game.

Yeah, you needed the bat. The game was not Not super appealing to watch, and then it all hell broke loose with the punt return, then kick return right back, which was pretty sick. Did you like the new uniforms?

No new uniforms yet.

I thought they were new.

Not yet.

Did the pants look grayer then, or were they sweating a lot?

I think it was just a hot Miami day.

Okay, it was a hot Miami day. Because they put the benches in the sun. Yeah.

Let's talk about your kicker. Yeah. I have a theory. I think Mike Vrabel is just too much an alpha that none of his kickers can ever have the confidence to kick. He just hates kickers.

He's got a horrible number. He's got a horrible swag for a kicker.

Number 36.

He's number 36. He's got an arm sleeve.

The arm sleeve on- And a sleeve of tattoos.

He looks like a 12-year-old went in the Madden creative player and spent an hour and a half customizing everything.

You do not want your kicker to have swag. Nothing about a natural kicker should exude coolness.

No. And he's got the ass towel, which is like that's Kadek who played, obviously, college football doing college football. He's like, no kicker should ever have an ass towel.

No.

You don't touch the ball with your hands.

Correct. He did. He came up clutch, though. He had a long field goal to ice the game.

Yeah, he did. But yeah, he missed two extra points?

The first two extra points, missed him badly.

Number 36 on the kicker doesn't look good. If you're a kicker, you take the screen. You don't even ask for a number. If you're a kicker, you go into the equipment room and you're like, whatever you got that dorks usually wear. I'll put that one on.

So, yeah, bad, really bad. And Vrabel definitely just hates it. He doesn't even... Probably he's not even going to acknowledge it.

Probably doesn't even know his name.

No.

No, they're just all kicker to him.

Get out there, kicker. Go miss that kick, kicker. Because this happen? Remember when he just didn't use kickers in Tennessee?

Yeah, because there was one guy that missed four in a row, and he was just like, Yeah, we're just not kicking the ball. We're not going to kick. Ever again. Mike McDaniel has to change his glasses. You can't wear those glasses and lose as much he's been losing.

I'd agree.

If you need to make a change, you got to have a different image. You can't be going through the tough times when you're looking like a coke dealer. Yeah.

I would say the heat on his seat is volcanic at this point because they had a players-only meeting after week one. Then after this game, Tua basically said the communication was terrible at the end of the game. Mike McDaniel then said the communication was terrible at the end of the game. It feels like it's going to be our first head coach fired this season.

Well, it's week two. Yeah. And Miami- And they have to play Buffalo on Thursday night. Miami is already flying planes over the stadium that say, Fire Greer, fire McDaniel. We're at sky riding bad territory for the Dolphins right now.

Here's a good thing for the Dolphins. Tyree Keel finally had a 30-yard catch. First time in a year. It was one of the most underthrown balls of all time, but it still counted.

It was over 30 yards, technically, yes.

Also, Tua is my favorite interception quarterback in the league now.

Tua might have a blind spot directly in the center of his field of vision.

That interception he threw to the linebacker was so fucking funny. He is now number one. If you're like, Hey, you want to laugh? Show me an interception. It's Tua.

The guy was about 15 yards in front of him directly in his field. Is there a term for that? Like nearsighted, farsighted?

Remember, Jameis had this when then he got a delay set.

Yeah, he was linebacker blind. But yeah, if you can't see things that are directly in front of your face, what is that called? I don't know. Denial?

Yeah. That interception, though, was so fucking funny. He just threw it right to the linebacker. It was a perfect pass to the linebacker. But yeah, he leads the league in funiest turnovers at this point. He's my number. He's my one-one pick for funiest turnover.

I agree. They're awesome. Hank, you guys traded a wide receiver today, or was that yesterday?

Yesterday.

Are you familiar with the Patriets track record with the receiver that they've drafted?

Yeah, it's not great.

Who did you trade?

Not Boody.

No, not Boody. Polk. Polk, yeah. Jalen Polk. Okay. Did you know who the last wide receiver that the Patriets drafted that has reached 1,500 receiving yards in his entire career is?

Is that a Steven Chase stat?

No. 1,500.

1,500 sounds like it. Sorry, 1,500 was his stat.

1,500. That's not that.

I thought it was 1,500. I got it.

1,500 isn't that many receiving yards.

We didn't draft receivers forever.

Wait, in his career?

In their entire career. Oh, that's crazy. I'm not talking about in a season.

Oh, yeah, that's crazy.

We didn't draft wide receiver forever. Then we took Nakeel hair. He was terrible.

Julian? It was Julian Edelman. Yeah. It was from Andy Hutchins. But yeah, That's a crazy stat, isn't it? Polk, was he a second rounder?

Might have been first.

Second. Meme's saying second.

Second rounder.

Memes on our Patriots beat.

Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

Where did Jalen Polk go to college?

Yeah, Washington. Husky. Hank's favorite team.

That's right. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Listen, Hank, Dreg may look good.

I feel like it's going to be an entertaining year. They're going to be in a lot of these games where it's like they're going to have to grind out wins.

But that was a big step for like-Shutout wins. Dreg may should look like that against a Dolphins defense that is bad. He was almost perfect. So that's good. Yeah. And you won the game.

It's a rebuilding year. It's like we got to win. There's going to be a lot of close games, and you just got to hope they get good experience out of them.

It was an awesome ending, too. It was exciting.

And we're just going to forget that you said that you're going to have the most wins of anyone on this part.

I mean, we're only one back right now.

So you're going to stand with it?

I'm just saying we're only one back.

Okay.

All right. So you're only one back. Big Cat is only one back of you.

That's true.

True.

Same with me. It's right there. We're knocking on the door.

Anything could happen. It's a long season. It is.

It is a long season. Yeah, I do think that it's going to be Mike McDaniel soon, right?

Let's just look. If you get a players only meeting after one week. One week. That's a pretty bad sign.

All right, the Dolphins- That's not even a play.

That's just telling your coaches, Hey, get out of here.

Yeah.

We don't want to talk to you.

All right, I'll make the prediction. If the Dolphins start 0-5, he will be fired because they play the Bills. They're going to lose to The Bills in Buffalo, Thursday night football. Then they play the Jets on Monday night football. Then they play the Panthers. If they lose to the Jets and the Panthers, if they don't get one win there, he's done.

I agree.

That's it for him. I'm sure he'll be a good offensive coordinator somewhere.

Yeah.

Maybe not a head coach.

Okay. You can't wear the glasses if you're an offensive coordinator. Those are winning head coach glasses. Yes, absolutely.

Pft, you want to do a couple of ads, and we'll get to the last two games of the early slate.

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Okay, Rams, Titans. Rams 33, Titans 19. I feel like the Rams offense finally woke up because they were in a dogfight with the Titans, 13-10 at half, I believe it was. Then Matthew Stafford was sensational in the second half. He went 14 for 17, 191 yards, two touch downs. They scored on four of their five drives. Maybe it was a game and a half that the Rams needed to finally wake up.

In the first half, all they really had was like, Let's hand the ball off to Pukun Nakuwa, and then he's going to break something nice for us. If you're a Titans fan watching this game, this season is probably going to stink for Titans fans out there. Oh, yeah. But we are firmly on guy watch with Kam Ward. That's really what you're paying attention to every week. Is Kam Ward a guy?

Was that throw smart?

That might be- The countdown throw we're talking about. Yeah, the countdown throw he threw a cross his body across the entire field. That is a throw that a guy would make. However, that's not a good throw that you want your guy to make because he's going to think that he can do that, and then it's going to be bad the next time they try.

That's a throw against Bethune-Cookman. Yes. Not against the Los Angeles Rams. Now, it did work. So credit to him. But that was a crazy... I can't imagine they go into film and they're like, Hey, good throw, dude. Great process. Because that was nuts. You rarely see that across the body, across the field.

Yeah. They're going to try to tell him not to do that, but since it worked, it's a good luck telling him that because it ended up being an awesome-looking play. They even have some of the super high-definition cameras that tracked it being like, Look at this great play by Kam Ward. Coach But his coaches are like, Don't ever fucking do that again, please. But he's going to.

His whole line is not great, so it's a work in progress. I have liked watching Kam Ward. He's fun to watch play. This game got away from me. It was actually his fumble in the second half that opened up the floodgates where it was like the Titans were hanging around, they were one possession game, and then it just ended there.

I would go far as to say that the Titans offensive line is bad right now. He's on pace to be sacked 93. 5 times this year, which actually it made me look up the David Kahr stats. So he's been sacked. How many times he gets sacked today? I know he got banged up a lot in week one. Today, he had... He was sacked five times. Five Five sacks. David Kahr, in his first two games, he got sacked 15 times. Pretty crazy. But right now, they're on pace to break that record.

He had six sacks in his first game.

What was the David Kahr again for the whole first year? Because Caleb was close. Was it 70? I can't remember, but it was... Caleb was close. Caleb got sacked 68 times last year.

I think it was 73 or 74 times for David Car. At the end.

For David Car? Seventy-six.

Seventy-six.

So Caleb was eight away.

So the fact that David Car got sacked 15 times in his first two games and only got sacked 76 times on the season?

Yeah, pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty good turnaround. His offensive line did all right. Yeah. Here's a crazy stat I saw. The Rams are a good football team. I think we all agree, right? They played the Eagles the toughest out of anyone last year in the playoffs. Every year, Stafford has been healthy. They've been in the playoffs. Do you know this was the largest regular season margin of victory the Rams have won by since week 13, 2023?

I did not know that. Isn't that crazy? They just don't blow anybody out.

They don't blow anyone out.

It's nuts. They probably do a great job of running the football.

Yeah, I saw it and I was like, Holy shit. I went and looked, and they did kill the Vikings last year in the playoffs. But regular season, every game is 10 points or less, pretty much, until you go back to week 13, 20, 23. I don't know. There's 13 or 14 wins in there that none of them were 14 points.

Yeah, McVay is a really good coach. Brian Callahan, I don't know. Can we even say if he's a good coach or not?

Yeah, I don't know.

He might be Ken Wissenhunt, 2. 0.

I like him as a guy.

Yeah, he seems like a good dude.

Yeah.

But he learned what to catch is. He learned what to catch. Calvin Ridley has not. Yeah.

The Titans need to just be a scrappy team this year. They get the Eagles. Or no, sorry. The Rams get the Eagles next week. Whose line is that anyway? Draftkings Sportsbook. Where is it? It's at? It's in Philly. Philadelphia.

It's in Philly. Eagles minus four and a half.

I would say Eagles. No. Eagles minus three and a half.

I'll say two and a half.

I think Hank might be right.

What is it?

Draftkings Sportsbook. It is Eagles minus four and a half.

Oh, wow. Nice, Hank. Good job. You were spot on. All right. Last game in the early slate, Ravens 41, Browns 17. This was an ass-kicking. It was close, actually, in the first half.

On Deshawn Watson's birthday.

Yeah, Deshawn Watson's birthday. They wished him a happy birthday on Twitter. Joe Flacko's return to Baltimore, which was cool. Do you see Dennis Pitta wearing our shirt?

He rocked the elite shirt today. Rocked the elite shirt.

The hug with Lamar after was awesome. Nothing Everything else the Browns did was awesome because it wasn't even like... The Ravens had 242 total yards of offense, and they still won by this margin. They blocked a punt. They had a pick, returned to the six-yard line. They demolished them.

They didn't even try to run the football. That was the craziest part about it. Derrick Henry had 23 yards today.

Yeah, the Browns defense held its own for a half, and then it just ran out of gas. There was nothing else that could be done. The Ravens, last year, we talked about it on Friday, but last year, they lost in a heartbreaker week one. They lost the Raiders week two. This feels like they corrected a little bit. Won an easy one, didn't give up a lead late. Ravens are going to be just fine. I have a question for you, PFT, and we love Joe Flacko. Why don't they start Dylan Gabriel?

We love Joe Flacko.

I love Joe Flacko, but the process makes no sense in the fact that Joe Flacko can't play forever. You drafted Dylan Gabriel, you might as well find out.

Yeah, well, they put him in. He had a perfect QBR because he went three for three.

Against the backup.

Against the backups for the Ravens. But still, you can't ask for anything better than three for three. Yeah. Yeah, they probably should start thinking about that. I don't think that Stefansky... I don't know what his relationship is like with Haslem, but I would imagine that the second Haslem says, Play Dylan Gabriel, he's going to play Dylan Gabriel. And until that happens, he's going to be like, I'm going to stick with Joe Flacko because I'm waiting for Haslem to tell me to put Gabriel in because then my clock resets on my job.

Yeah.

That's probably what's going through his head right now.

Okay. But they should. I feel like it should just happen.

Yeah, I think it's about that time.

It should just do it and see what you got. By the way, did you see the Adam Schefter report before this game that Shador Sanders, the Ravens were going to take him in the fifth round, but before Baltimore could turn in the card, the former Colorado star let it be known that he didn't to be on the roster with Lamar Jackson, where he'd be a backup. Instead, he's a backup to Dylan Gabriel and Joe Flacko.

And Bayly Zappi.

That's a crazy story.

That is, yeah.

I think you'd want to be on the Ravens no matter what. I mean, the fact- If you're drafted by any team, a Ravens is probably the top of the list of teams from an organizational standpoint, you'd want to be drafted by.

This also tells me that he probably told the Browns, Don't draft me, if they had already taken Dylan Gabriel, right? Yeah. Because if the Ravens were going to take him in the fifth, then Dylan Gabriel is already on the Browns at that point. Then they tell Shador, Hey, we want to draft you. He probably said, Please don't draft me. They said, Fuck you. We're going to draft you so hard.

We're going to draft the fuck out of you.

This is the start of a great relationship.

I don't get it. It's not like Lamar has missed time.

Yeah.

If you told me I had to be a backup anywhere, I think the Ravens would probably be number one.

Lamar and Deion could share a sponsorship with the Pins. Get that same 10 on the sideline for the Ravens games. Also, credit to Lamar Jackson. So today, he didn't have the most... He had 225 yards passing, four touch downs, no interceptions, quarterback rating 128. 6. That makes Lamar Jackson the highest rated NFL quarterback of all time. All time? Of all time.

According to QBR?

No, not QBR.

Oh, the rating.

The passer rating. The passer rating. Yeah. So he officially passed Aaron Rodgers. Lamar Jackson is the best passing quarterback of all time by the metrics, which is crazy because he's also the best running quarterback of all time.

That is nuts. That's wild. I think Lamar might be really good.

I think he's really good.

I think I've seen enough guys. I think Lamar is really good. Yeah.

Maybe they have Lamar play the regular season and then Shador in the playoffs.

Fuck them up when they're not thinking.

That's what they were What are they going to do.

The Ravens are also the 13th team in NFL's history to score at least 40 points in each of their first two games, but they're the first to do it without being 2-0.

That's pretty impressive.

Yeah, that is. Yeah. Isn't it? Also, this is a sad Brown stat, but maybe comforting? I don't know. I don't know. The Browns are a mess. The Browns have outgained their opponents 649 to 383 through two weeks in their own two. That's crazy. That's insane.

That's Mostly a bangles Brown stat, but yes.

Well, no, today, too.

This game, they did a decent job on defense.

Yeah, and they outgained the Ravens today. They lost 41 to 17, and they outgained the Ravens. I think they outgained them by 100 yards. Yeah, close to 100 yards. It's not great for the Browns right now. Let's just say that. I don't really know what... I don't know what they're doing.

I don't know where they're going. They don't know any better.

But shout out that wedding. I'm sure those people are happily married now.

You see, there was also a proposal at the Titans game today, too. Oh, really? Yeah. That's beautiful. We need this every week.

We need that. We need a wedding at the Titans game, maybe for their new stadium. Be like, Honey, I booked the newest building in all of Nashville. It's the Titans' new stadium. Okay. Colts, Broncos. Colts, 29. Broncos, 28. The Indianapolis Colts are 2-0 for the first time since 2009.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

Pretty crazy. Well, They haven't won in week one in like what?

Yeah, it was since 2013.

Yeah. They're also the first team in the Super Bowl era to not punt in either their first two games in a season.

Because one of them today was an illegal...

Was it a penalty? No, they had a couple of turnovers on downs.

I think they punted today, but then there was a penalty, and they didn't.

Did they actually try to do that?

I think so.

But still, technically, the Colts have not punted by the NFL rulebook.

That's pretty crazy.

It's nuts. Booger said that if Jones can play average, they could be a playoff team. We still don't know because Daniel Jones has not played. He's played awesome. Yeah.

Daniel Jones was awesome again today. This was, though, to me, all time. Yes, the colds are 2-0. It's awesome. Vibes are great. Jim Irsay season. They're 2-0 now with Jim Irsay's daughter, the new owner, on the sideline with the headset ready to go. The Broncos completely blew this game. Big The Broncos had this game. Bo Nicks was phenomenal in the first half. Then he had a really bad interception towards the end of the game where they could have their infield goal range. They had some bad penalties, and then they had the really bad penalty where they were It was a 60-yard field goal, and they got called for leverage, which I think that's worse than the actual penalty is the ref announcing to everyone penalty on the Broncos for leverage.

Yeah, I don't understand. I guess the long snapper is technically in a defenseless position.

You can't jump on his back.

You can't touch the long snapper.

He pushed him down and went up a little.

But that should not be a penalty.

No. It just shouldn't.

It just shouldn't. Yeah.

It's also just a funny thing to be like, leverage, which you want leverage.

Yeah.

Leverage is a good thing in football.

Yeah. Penalty on- But not in this. Penalty on a Tyreek Hill for speed.

Yeah, but it was a blown opportunity for the Broncos because it felt like they had this game won. They came out of the halftime, felt like they were controlling the game. Jonathan Taylor, he's awesome still.

He was great. It was awesome. Daniel Jones played pretty good today. Jonathan Taylor looked awesome. He had so many breakaways where it was like, this is the old Jonathan Taylor from a couple of years ago. I thought that the Broncos were the better team overall, but it was a great game.

Yeah.

This was awesome.

It was a very fun game.

And good for the Colts because they've been stuck in purgatory when it comes to their quarterbacks for a long time. They put up this sad graphic on the where it's just like, Here's a list of guys that you remember watching play in the post Andrew luck era. There are some guys on there. I had wiped from my memory the Matt Ryan Colts year. Yeah.

Well, no, I didn't because I remember the 12-12 game or 12: 9 game, Thursday Night Football, that we watched in that New Jersey Gambling House. That was one of the most depressing experiences I think we've all shared together.

That was Matt Ryan. I thought in my head, that was Carson Wentz. Is it anything bad- I think it was Matt Ryan. Anything bad or boring that's ever happened, I just assume Carson Wentz was the quarterback.

I think it was Matt Ryan versus Russell Wilson. Broncos Colts. I'm pretty sure. That was one of the worst games. But actually, I should say, remember, it did get to a point where it was so bad, it was good at the end because it was so hilariously bad. Yeah, it was Matt Ryan and Russell Wilson. Holy shit, that was a bad game. 2022, overtime game, and the Colts defeated. Yeah, because Russell Wilson, remember, didn't he miss a... One of his guys, I Was it was a... Courtland Sudner, who was wide open?

Wide open, missed him. Maybe Jerry Judy was wide open and so pissed about it.

Yeah. Yeah, he was yelling at him after the game. That was the moment that Russell Wilson was like, Oh, shit, this is not going to work out. Nathaniel Hackett. Man, time is going fast. I can't believe Nathaniel Hackett interview was three years ago.

That is crazy. I remember when Russell missed that one pass, Jerry tweeted out, I think Sierra should give Future another shot. Yeah. Then he fell in love with the Future, or with the little Future, and with Russell Wilson the next year.

Yeah, for an entire season. That was a bad game. But yeah, the Colts look good. I'm happy for Colts fans. I'm happy for Seth.

Yeah, and they are doing a great job of just getting Tyler Warren the ball at all costs. He's good.

We also had the mascot game was back against the kids. Always fun, where they just dummy a bunch of little kids in pads. The mascot going from despair to celebrating was a very funny wrinkle in game.

The Colts mascot also, his celebration is the little Hump. Humps his waist out a little bit. All the Colts players got next to him and just started fucking the air in unison with him today. That was good to see.

The vibes are high for the Indianapolis Colts. Very high. Yeah. Shane Steiken can coach a little quarterback. The quarterback can listen. Yeah, it feels good. Vibes are high. Who do they play next week? Because this was a good test, although I wasn't all the way in on the Broncos hype type Titans. It could be 3-0.

Then Rams, then Raiders. It could be tough. Then Cardinals. Yeah.

We could be looking at the Colts. It will be very interesting to see what happens with the Texans on Monday Night Football. Texans start owned, too, which I need, by the way. We'll get to that in a second. All right, before we do the last two games, and then we have Sunday Night Football. Pft, you have a couple more ads, and we'll do the last three games.

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Okay, Cardinals, Panthers. Cardinals 27, Panthers 22. This is one of those games that the Cardinals were absolutely dominating, should have covered. And then we had the full Kyler experience in, I think it was a matter of three plays where Kyler had one of the coolest scrambles for, I don't know, 30, 40 yards. Then he had one of the dumbest interceptions that brought the Panthers back in this game, including a Panthers' onside kick recovery, which we should always celebrate onside kick recoveries because we never get to see him anymore.

Yeah, I agree with that. Also, Kyler, it was a 30-yard scramble that he had. He ended up with 32 yards rushing on seven carries. It's crazy. That's nuts to think about. Kyler, he should run the ball more. Yeah. He's very fast, and people lose him behind the big offensive lineman I do think he's getting shorter. He is. He looked tiny today. I was thinking about that. It's also the fact that the Cardinals always wear the same-colored jerseys as pants. Yes. That makes him look so much shorter. It's like a little onesie. He looked like he was in a Christmas story today. Yeah. But yeah, I actually thought Bryce Young looked even smaller than Kyler today. And it was because Bryce, he was throwing cute little jump passes where he didn't have to jump, but he was just putting his whole body into it, really springing up there. But yeah, They should let him run the ball more because he's fast as fuck. He's very good at it. And it also creates a different thing that the defense has to be on the lookout for. And when he does that, it's a completely different ball game.

Was this a statement lost for the Panthers?

Yeah. What's the statement, though?

The statement is maybe we aren't absolute dog shit because for, I don't know, three quarters, maybe it was two and a half quarters because I think the Cardinals started the second half going down the field and making it 27 to three. At that point, I was like, Yeah, the Panthers are maybe the worst team in the NFL. Then they actually put in some fight, scored 20 unanswered, fought back really hard, made this a game late, had the ball, statement loss. Maybe they could be a frisky Saints S team.

I think what we always see with Bryce Young has been right when people think that he's the shittiest, he tends to do something that surprises you.

He started, he fumbled on the third He looked bad.

He looked really bad today. Then at the end, it's like, Oh, okay. Maybe the key is just throw the ball to McMillon and let him just jump up in the air with one hand and just snatch it. Yeah.

The Cardinal's offense is weird to me because I thought they were going to dominate this game because the Panthers defense is bad, but it just... Something's off. I don't know if it's Kyler and Marvin Harrison. It doesn't feel like their run game is really great. I don't know. They're 2-0, so they shouldn't complain. 2-0 is 2-0. Great. But yeah, it just gets to that point. The second half, they just couldn't put the Panthers away successfully. They let them hang around. I don't know what it is.

It's early football. I don't know. To be honest with you, this game was on the third TV I was paying attention to until the fourth quarter. Then I was like, Oh, Bryce. Because I'll be honest, Bryce made me look away from this game in the first half. I was like, This one's over for the Panthers. I guess he's mentally tough if he's able to play that poorly.

Then-so I'm saying statement lost. They didn't lose. They just ran out of time.

Well, we welcomed back Hunter Renfro. Had two touch downs today. He's back. Hunter's back. That was weird how he just dropped out of the NFL for a while. Then he came back. Then he's back, and I guess he's just doing the same things that Hunter Renfro always does. Yeah, good for him. A little double move, sure hands, coach's son. Good for the Panthers, I guess.

Yeah, statement lost.

To me, the statement is that Ted Miller is fucking awesome and just throw the ball in his direction because he's got the biggest catch radius of any receiver that I've seen in a long time.

We're going to find out Cardinal's play at the 49ers next week. I feel like that will be a... Am I right that the Cardinal's offense because the 49ers defense is good and it's like, Hey, what's going on? Am I right that it's not as smooth as it should be?

I don't trust- Or is it just early football? No, I don't trust the Cardinal's offense. I don't.

Right. Explosives. Last game. Eagles 20, Chief 17. Max, who's on your shit list?

What do you mean?

Chris Jones?

No. That's just him being a sore loser at the end of the game and realizing that he just lost to the Eagles for the third straight time.

Okay. Dean Blandino?

I don't care.

Dean Blandino said he was done with the touche push. Done. It's impossible to officiate. He said it's bullshit.

From an officiant From a marketing standpoint, he said, I can't watch anymore.

Cool. I have nothing to say about that. If you want to call it, call it. If you're not going to call, we're going to keep doing it.

Okay. What do you mean by it?

False starts. Yeah, they're false starts. I don't give a fuck.

That's the correct response. Yeah. By the way, Jalen Hurts-If they don't call it, then they're actually not false starts.

Yeah, exactly. I'm not going to apologize for referees not calling false starts.

But would you if-They are false starts.

Yes.

So you should apologize. No. Okay.

Don't care.

Jalen Hurts did have 101 yards. Chris Jones was wrong. I think what was the exact thing? He was like, You didn't even have 100 yards.

He was like, You didn't even have 100 yards. And he was like, We won the fucking game each shit or something. Yeah.

It doesn't matter because Jalen Hertz... The Eagles don't have be able to pass the ball. Jalen Hertz doesn't have to be able to throw for 300 yards. He doesn't. They're going to run the football. They're going to have their offensive linemen just shove you over repeatedly until you stop it. And then if he can take a couple shots downfield now and again, he's got great receivers and there's not a lot you can do. You don't want them to be throwing the ball 35 times a game. That's not what your team is built around. Just because you don't have a quarterback that is putting up the craziest numbers in the stat sheet doesn't mean that you don't have a great football team that is winning games, which is what he's designed to do.

Correct.

This game was a tough watch. It was a rock fight, but the Eagles defense looked good, and they won the rock fight. So who cares, right?

Yeah. No, I would like a little bit more creativity on offense. I saw a lot of wide receiver screens, quick slants. I would like a little bit of a something. The Spagnola just dial up a blitz every single time. I think he blitz on 60% of plays.

Oh, that one sack was so sick, where they closed like... Jailherge jumped and he fucking smashed him.

Oh, yeah, he got smoked. That was a sick one. He was trying to scramble away from the pass rush, and he just scramble right into a tackle.

Big Cat, do you know who Kansas City's leading rusher is this season? It's Patrick Mahomes. It's Patrick Mahomes. Is Patrick Mahomes a glorified running back? Got to be able to throw the ball in this league.

The Chiefs, they don't look good. I know they played two good teams, but they don't look good. Their offense does not look good. Patrick Mahomes has not looked sharp.

Little bro ass.

They're 0-2 for the first time in Patrick Mahomes' career. Patrick Mahomes has lost three times in a row, which is the first time that's happened since 2017. This is their first time they're 0-2 since 2014.

The Chiefs are 0-2. Yeah. 0-2 is a crazy record for the Chiefs. It It is. Once in a lifetime.

I really, really need the Texans to lose on Monday night. Otherwise, I was looking at it, and the Chiefs are literally the only team I could-Oh, no. Yeah, I don't know what to say. I need the Texans to lose because I was looking at the 0-2 teams, and the only argument for a team that had legitimate Super Bowl aspirations would be the Houston Texans. Every other team that is 0-2 was a dog shit team. Here are the 0-2 teams: Jets, Dolphins, Browns, Titans, Chiefs, Giants, Bears, Saints, Panthers. It's literally just the Texans go 0-2 or the Chiefs are my pinkies.

You know who really fucked you over was Memes by losing to the Steelers in week one. I know. Because then the Steelers would have been a great team for Aaron Rodgers. It would have been perfect. Yeah.

Perfect.

Unfortunately.

But the The Chiefs are going to get healthy. No.

But are they good? I need the Texans to lose. I need the Texans to lose. I need the Texans to lose. I cannot have the Chiefs to lose because you know the Patrick Mahomes, and it will be such torture in the playoffs because you know they're going to win playoff games because they always do.

But can Patrick Mahomes win on the- That's a sicko's dream tonight. Can Patrick Mahomes win on- sicko's dream bet.

For people who are maybe new to the show, every year, I pick a Pinky team that's 0-2, starts the season 0-2, and I say, This team will not win the Super Bowl. If they do, I'll cut off the very tip of my pinkie. For the Chiefs, it might even be more of the very tip of my pinkie. But we've had two teams in the nine years I've been doing this make the playoffs, the Texans, the year they won 10 in a row, the JJ Watt, Aaron Foster, Letterman Jacket year, and then last year, the Rams. What?

That was not the Aaron Foster, JJ Watt year.

Are you sure?

Yeah. I don't even think we were doing the show when that happened.

When did they do the Letterman jacket?

That was like 2014.

All right, well, whatever. The Texans made the playoffs, whatever it was, 2016, 2017.

That was the Vrabel. Vrabel was on the staff, I think.

What year did they do the Letterman jacket? It does look like a young JJ Watt.

That was Aaron's idea, by the way.

Do you have a date?

I think it was 2014.

Okay. That That says I still know if I have the Letterman jacket.

That was four years later, it says.

So that would be 20. It wasn't Letterman jacket, but it was the Texan's year where they won nine in a row after I picked them. Then last year, the Rams. The Rams were probably the closest because the Rams were a good team last year.

If you picked the Chiefs and they When the Super Bowl, you know that Taylor Swift is going to be watching that live stream. Oh, yeah.

By the way, should we talk about Tate? That's really what it's at. I need the Texans to lose. The Texans will be my Pinky team if they lose. If not, it's going to have to be the Chiefs. I'm going to We're going to lose a Pinky. Eventually, I'm going to lose a Pinky. We're going to do this show for the next 40 years. I'm going to do this bet every year. I'm going to lose the Pinky.

Let's plan this out, though. Let's think about it. It's the Super Bowl. We're in San Francisco. It is the Kansas City Chiefs against the Green Bay Packers.

What do you do? I lose a pinkie for that. The tip of my pinkie? I'm going to go.

You'd be rooting for the Chiefs at that point.

This is making me anxiety. I would definitely be rooting for the Chiefs.

I mean, that could happen.

Bucks, Yeah, I mean, Bucks is the play tonight for sure.

I need the Bucks to win.

Also, apparently, Zack had a great take on the Chiefs.

I mean, Texas is the play tonight.

What do you got?

Running the Mill take. I just think the dynasty is over. I think Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes' dynasty is finished.

There you go. So your pinkie is fine.

I'm not going to speak for your body parts, but I do think their dynasty is over. Okay. It could be good. But hopefully, I would like to see the Texans lose tomorrow as well, so you could take a Texans.

Yeah, I would take the Texans.

Zack, what are you seeing out of the Chiefs that you think the dynasty's over?

I don't have an in-depth knowledge on why it feels such a way, but usually when they pin the camera to Andy Reid, he's got a certain amount of-Gurth? That, a lot of times, yes. But he always looks calm and collective, but this time it almost looks a little hollow. It looks a little empty. Like, Oh, are we still there? I'm not sure. I don't think he thinks they're still there. You know what it is?

It's the mustache turning gray in the middle. It looks like he's withering away.

Fading away. We got other grown men throwing timber tantrums on the sideline early in the I saw Blake has some grays.

He's only two years old, but he's got some grays that are coming right around the mouth. When I saw that, I got sad. I was like, Oh, poor guy. That's how I feel now when I look at Andy Reid.

Andy Reid, great guy, but the dynamics might be over.

Great guy. Travis Kelsi might be back. What do you mean? He looked good today.

Except he lost the game.

Yeah, but I'm saying when he caught in his athleticism was pretty good today.

Yeah, but he did pretty much lose him the game.

I know, but I'm saying the rumors of his demise might have been a bit exaggerated because he looked faster than I saw him all last season.

But that- One stiff arm play was good.

Yeah, but that play was not a Travis Kelsey play. The not turning his head around quick enough and having the ball bounce into... That was a disastrous, disastrous play. I actually thought that maybe he He's back, athletically, but his head's not back because Tate might be pregnant. Did you see her coming into the stadium?

I saw that there was a black screen set up. Yes. Yeah.

Yes. That's the rumor.

I'm so dumb. That's the rumor. I just thought that… Did you see her? She didn't want to be photographed. Hank?

No.

They have a wall.

A modesty wall.

They literally created a wall for her entrance, and they rolled it as she walked in. Look at this. Something interesting. What a diva. Something interesting.

I don't know if that's a pregnancy.

That's the most dramatic shit I've ever seen.

I don't know. That's the most dramatic shit I've ever seen.

I don't know. It's a bit early for… Big cat, they're not even married. That's true. How would that be possible?

They did just get engaged. But-shotgun wedding?

I saw the engagement pictures. She wasn't pregnant in those.

Well, it's not showing.

Not showing.

Now, maybe it's a month later. She needs a wall.

She could wear a jacket, though.

She could. Or she could wear a wall.

You don't need a wall guy to walk around next to you.

Why have to put on a big jacket when you could wear a wall?

Maybe she got a bad haircut.

Although, didn't last year, wasn't she put in a vending machine or something? I don't know. Popcorn, yeah.

They put Taylor Swift in a vending machine?

They hit her in a popcorn machine. Yeah, Memes backs me up on that.

Yeah, it was like a popcorn machine. Yeah.

Is there a chance the Chiefs might not make the playoffs?

Yeah. Dude, they're on to it.

Make them your panky team.

I would much rather have it be the Texans. Let's bring up the stats.

Well, it's because also the AFC West is tough. I mean, the Chargers are good. The Broncos seem like they're good. The Raiders are friskier than they've been. I know this is only through one week. They did play the Eagles tough, but it never felt like the Chiefs were going to pull away or anything. It was a 20 10 game. Then they just started bombing the ball to Taekwan Thornton, who is very fast. Missed a couple of those. Yeah, I don't know. It definitely... Hank, remember when the Patriots used to go 0-2? It's like, it's over, and then Zack is playing the role of Max Kellermann right now.

No, the Chiefs look bad. This is different. This is much different. They look bad. They look bad.

It's way different.

They don't have any weapons. Their offense looks so... I mean, the fact that Patrick Mahomes is running the as much as he is in week two tells me something's wrong. Because he runs the ball usually like, play-offs when he has to win. It's like, I need a play. He ran the ball a lot today.

On the broadcast, I think they said that exact thing. It was like, Normally, I don't like to run until the play-offs, but this year, I feel like I need to.

I think-He's also throwing his body around a little bit more, which is tossing.

Which is concerning. He did fuck up one of the Eagles. That was sick.

Cheese players also wearing free Rice shirts is crazy.

Free Rice.

Rashi Rice? I guess Rashi Rice is going to come back, and so is Xavier worthy. That actually, okay.

That's why I told you. I was like, they're going to get healthy.

Xavier worthy is coming back. Not healthy. I don't know. I think the Chiefs, Big Head, only 9% of teams that start out '02 make the playoffs. It's a 90% chance that you don't have to even worry about your Pinky.

That's actually crazy that I've been doing this for eight years, and two times I've had a payoff team.

Yeah.

That's higher than 9%.

It was because you picked some of the better '02 teams.

Yeah, true. Is Jake Elliott back, Max?

Jake Elliott is looking very back.

He looks very back.

He's awesome again.

Yeah. So you feel good? 2-0, feel good?

I feel good. I could feel better.

Defense look better. Offense has not played great for six quarters now? Yes. Yeah. You have the new play collar, so that makes you a little nervous because last time you did the play collar thing, you had a year from hell.

Well, we've had five offensive coordinators in six years.

Jalen Hursey. Right, but I'm saying you had Shane Steke and went to a Super Bowl, lost him, had a year from hell, then last year had- Kael Kellyn Moore. Kellyn Moore. You hope that Kevin Patula is more Kellyn Moore than he is. Who is in the year from hell?

Johnson.

Brian. Yeah, Brian Johnson or whatever. I don't know. That's the guy that's trying to live forever and charts his cum. I think that is his name.

Yeah, it's the guy that charts his son's boners.

Boners, yeah. Yeah, you're right.

Yeah. Also the singer of Asia DC. Memes your members in the scene.

What?

Memes Memes pulls this memory stuff all the time. He just knows everything.

Good memory, Memes. Good memory. Okay, last one. I have the rowback question. Robackk. Com, promo code take. 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, rowback. Com. Promo code take. Is JJ McCarthy bad?

That's what he wants you to think.

He was bad tonight.

He was ass.

He got his ass kicked. I also just want to say credit to the Falcons. I think the Falcons defense is really good. It does make me a little nervous that if we're doing the transitive property game, what are our biggest takeaways from week two? Because watching the Falcons demolish the Vikings It makes me think the bears are even worse than I thought four hours ago after they got a 50 burger put on them.

Yeah, that's bad for you.

And the packers, I think those are the biggest two transitive property takeaways. The packers. Unfortunately, the packers are really, really, really good. And the bears are really, really, really, really ass.

Stealers might be bad. That might be a transitive property one.

Good job. Yeah, that was good. I like that. No, He's the one that sucks. Don't forget about him. Yeah, I'd say that those are the two most fair takeaways from that because you start to run into circular logic with any other team. But you can look at those.

It's too early to do this, but it's fun to do it. It's fun to be like, Oh, we have two data points. Let's just make some sweeping generalizations from all of it.

Because you could say that the Vikings have played four-halves, and three out of the four-halves have sucked offensively. Yeah. The Falcons didn't look great on offense. They just kicked a shitload of field goals.

Yeah. Yeah, no, they did. Parker Romo.

Yeah, but the JJ McCarthy discourse is going to be very fun to watch this because, yeah, he played like dog shit.

I will say in JJ McCarthy's defense, He's obviously, I think, Kelly got hurt. Dersal is still not playing. Addison is still not playing. Also had a baby like 48 hours ago. Probably not the most ideal setting.

No, the The Falcons had, I think, a pretty good game plan. They just sucked in the red zone. They couldn't punch it in when it was close. They had penalties. They had all sorts of miscues. But Bijon Robinson was awesome today. Their game plan seemed to be just get him the ball any possible way that you can. It was a great game plan. Then they just fucked it up with procedural stuff and couldn't get in the red zone or in the end zone when they were in the red zone.

For the Falcons, you haven't had a defensive game like this in a long time. This probably feels very good. Did they sack JJ McCarthy five in the first half alone, I believe. I think it was six total, but five times in the first half, they were all over the place, felt like they were flying. So yeah, Falcons might be good.

I think they are. I think Pennex is good.

Pennex might be good.

I don't think he's very good yet, but I think he's good. I think that the Falcons, they probably signed Kirk Cousins and said, Hey, this is a smokescreen. No one's going to think that we're going to draft Michael Pennex, so it'll fall to us. So let's just pay this guy $100 million so we get our guy, and it It worked.

Galaxy brain thinking. Yeah. Okay. Any other big takeaways from Week 2? Big time one. So Chiefs Bad, Bear's Jet's Ass, Stealers might be bad. Falcons might be good.

Aubrey, better than Tom braided.

Aubrey, better than Tom braided. Don't let PFT draft a team for you. No. Lion's good. Lion's good. Raven Wins, really good, but we knew that. Bill's really good. Patriots?

Bad. Afc East, bad. Bad. Easy for the Bills. Bad.

Patriots, bad or Patriots, question mark?

Patriots, bad. Patriots, yeah. Patriots are not...

It's hard to win on the road.

Yeah, maybe sneak in the playoff.

Hard to beat Tua.

Very tough.

07 against Tua up until today, especially with a shitty kicker. Yeah.

Good against bad teams, struggle against good teams. Okay.

What would be… I guess the only thing that could happen on Monday Night Football that would make me feel a little bit better if the Texans end up winning is if the Chargers then lose because then maybe the Chiefs are really bad.

Yeah.

You know what I mean? Or get the transit property.

Yeah. Worst case for that would be that the Raiders might be good because then they'll also be the Chiefs. Correct.

Also be a formidable- Yeah.

So if If the Raiders beat the Chargers, no worries, because then they're going to kick the shit out of the Chiefs. Right. Got it.

Right. Okay. Should we do Who's Back of the Week? And we will end the show. Who's Back of the Week, Hank?

Who's Back of the Week is Twister Tea.

Oh, let's go.

New alcohol sponsor alert, at least.

I didn't even realize it was sitting here the whole time.

Twister Tea. I mean, this is a beautiful, beautiful moment for me personally. I'm sure you guys as well. I love Twister Tees going back to the day I turned 21. It was my favorite thing to drink. Best thing to drink in the summer. Best thing to drink anytime, really. Twister Tea, the official hard ice tea of part of my take. Yes. Love that. Beautiful, beautiful future coming.

That was great flavors, too.

Great flavors.

Original peach, half and half, raspberry. Peach, my favorite. I'm sipping on an Ogie right now.

Who's Back to the Week is sponsored by Twisted Tea. That's funny, Hank. Twisted Tea is refreshing hard ice tea made with real brewed tea and 5% alcohol. Twisted tea is a perfect alcohol beverage to keep the good times going all season long, whether you're hanging out at a friend's house, catching a game at the stadium or at the bar, or just seeing where the day takes you. Twisted tea is there to turn your day up a notch and make a good time, a great time. Keep it twisted. Grab a tea. It's game time. Stock up on ice cold twisted tea today. We want people to tweet us. Tweet us your twisted tees. These big boy cans are great.

I don't think they do it anymore, but when they used to put the pictures on the back of the bottles. They do. I used to try so hard to get it. We should try to get on the back of these.

We should actually absolutely try to get on the back of these.

I used to try so hard to get on the back of these.

People tweet us your pictures with your twisted tees. So Eddie had his block party a month and a half ago, and he had every single alcohol you could imagine stocked in his fridge. I drink Twisted Tees the whole night. That was before they even came on. I absolutely love Twisted Tees. Super refreshing. They are so, so good. We're Twisted Tea podcast now. Tweet us your picture of you hanging out with Twisted Tea. Great sipping on the couch drink. You know what I mean? Just sitting down, having a couple Twisted Tees at the end of the night, having a couple Twisted Tees while you watch some football.

Or a tailgate. Maybe it's in the morning. You don't want to get too crazy. You just want to ease into it.

Twisted tea. I was going to say start of the night, twisted tea. Yeah.

Hot day, twisted tea. Yeah, on a boat, twisted tea. Hank, do you have another who's back?

Yeah, my other who's back is Ken Rosenthal.

Yes.

I saw this video. I saw it tonight. Whitney tweeted it. I saw it from Ryan Whitney, our colleague, tweeted it. It was a postgame. He was about to do an interview player, which is pretty normal in baseball. The player who was about to get interviewed, his teammate came over, dumped the water, gatorade, whatever it was on him. Then Ken Rosenthal tried to get out of the way. There was a guy behind him who just happened to be in Ken's way. Ken Rosenthal looked like he might have taken the guy out back and murdered him after. He was so mad. I've never seen someone look more... He literally looked daggers through this guy's soul.

It was so funny. Bold him over like he was Derek Henry, and then just stood over him, staring him down.

Don't get Ken Rosenthal shot. Hey, what the fuck?

That's a man right there. Then he gave a little like, I'm sorry, afterwards. But you can't hide what his initial reaction was. No. His initial reaction was like, yeah, a running back, getting the end zone on a fourth and one from the-I don't think he gave it.

I don't think he gave it.

I'm sorry. No.

He started shaking his head as he's walking away.

Yeah, he was like, You, motherfucker, why would you be there? He was so pissed. We got to tell our story, even though we've told it before. Because someone who tweeted at me today. It's every time I see Ken Rosenthal. Hank and I on the flight with Ken Rosenthal sitting across from us.

I forgot about it.

I forgot about it until someone tweeted me because I tweeted the video this morning when I first saw it, and someone was like, Every time I see Ken Rosenthal, I think of the story of you and Hank told on the podcast a few years ago. It's actually seven years ago. I think we're going to Miami. We got to Miami. Ken Rosenthal just in this... We land, the seat belt thing goes off, everyone stands up. Ken Rosenthal in one just perfect motion hopped up onto his seat to go to his overhead in his compartment and get his bag down. Hank and I witnessed it and we were just dying laughing.

Was he wearing the bow tie?

I think he might have been.

I don't know. He was probably in a quarter zip.

But it was such a move that we knew he did that every time because he did it so quickly. It was just like, ding, boom. He hopped right up, grabbed his bag, hopped right down.

Sports journalist. Never seen it before. They're creatures of habit. If he did that once, that means he does that every time he's on a plane. I got to assist him.

Hank and I were just because we're sitting right across and we're like, Did Did you see that? Is that really what just happened?

You're right. He does not wave to him to say, I'm sorry. He's got his palm up like, What the fuck are you doing here? He's mad. I thought the palm was down being like, My bad. No, he's just like, What the fuck, asshole. Yeah.

Oh, man. Okay. Good who's back. Good who's back. Pft.

Great who's back. My who's back is another guy getting run over.

Yeah.

Brian Kelly. Yeah. Got run over again on the sidelines. We'll talk more about college football on Wednesday, But that was so fun. He got absolutely truck-stick on the sidelines. I think America... I don't know if people still root for LSU. Definitely not like they did when Coach O was there. But LSU has always been a likable school, and I find myself liking them in spite of Brian Kelly. I still want bad things to happen to Brian Kelly as LSU does good. And that was just a perfect moment that we got to watch. It was. Where it was, yes, LSU is kicking the shit out of Florida, and Brian Kelly is also maybe getting a little injured on the sidelines.

Then he had an all-time press conference.

He flipped out at a reporter for being like- Had a little Calhoun in him. Yeah. He was like, Your running game is not that good. I'll just say it. Then Brian Kelly was like, Did you watch the game? You see the last play of the game? Checkmate. The guy preved it, too.

He was like, Oh, I know the game has ended. You don't like to do this, but what do you think out there? And he's like, No, we're not doing this. That was more Braddy than Calhouny.

Yeah. But when he said, You're spoiled, that's what I think you are. You're spoiled.

Brian in the back. I know you love these immediate postgame sessions, but what are you seeing with your offense? Stop. Really? We won the game 20 to 10.

Try another question. What do you want me to tell you? I just made it out for you.

We played the game to win the game.

We played the game to win the game. All right. How about third down then?

What is going on with third down?

It's one game. Last game, we were great on third down. You micro You're looking at this from the wrong perspective. Lsu won the football game.

Won the game.

I don't know what you want from me. What do you want? You want us to win 70 to nothing against Florida to keep you happy? No, I think people want to know why you can't run the ball, quite honest. We can run the ball. Did you see the last play of the game? That's all you need. You just need one. There's some ridiculous questions, and I'm getting tired of it. That football team just worked their tail off to get an SEC win, and you want to know what's wrong. You know what? You're spoiled.

You're spoiled.

This team is 17 and one at night.

17 and one. Give them some respect.

You're spoiled. How about that?

I love it. By the way, last week, they played Louisiana Tech, and they won 23 to seven. Yeah. I think it's a fair question.

By the way, I have a question for you guys, and this is similar, but there was a viral tweet going around that was like, Here's all the apps and everything you need to watch every game today. I know that's a big discussion because NBA has split it up, and that's different because NBA is like, That's one league. College football is the one spot where I actually don't have a problem that you have to... Because there was a day not too long ago, 10, 15 years ago, where you couldn't watch any of these. Yes.

Because it's not like there's going to be one provider that's capable of every single game because there's so many of them.

Right. It's not like the NFL splitting up is bullshit where it's like, Oh, yeah, we have Amazon, then you got to get YouTube TV and all this stuff. But college football, you just didn't watch half the games because you just didn't have access to them. That's the one sport where I'm like, Yes, thank you that you actually have given me the chance to be able to watch every game.

Yeah, and if you're a casual college football fan, guess what? You don't need all those apps. No. You just need a couple.

Yeah, because I know that's a very I understand it for all the other professional league, but college football, when I saw that one, I was like, Wait, I'm pumped that I actually have access to all these games now where you used to not be able to. Yeah. Okay, my Who's Back of the Week, I have two. The first is Anthony Rizzo because he retired as a cub on Saturday, all-time cub, one of my favorite cubs. He had an incredible day. He went in the bleachers. Mo Balesteros hit his first career home run, and it hit Rizzo in the hand. The odds of that happening are so insane. It's crazy.

But also respect to everybody that was around Rizzo because they all backed off and let Rizzo have a shot at it. Yeah.

Then Rizzo threw it back, which was awesome, so he could have his home run ball. But yeah, the odds of him sitting in the bleachers. He bought everyone a beer. He was wearing his... He retired in a jersey that was signed by all the kids that he visited at the cancer hospital when he was a cub. He's Obviously, a cancer survivor. Just an all-time, all-time guy, all-time cub. He was there before they got good. He was there for the World Series. I was able to catch up with him on Saturday night because he had a party, and it was just trading memories with him for 10 minutes. It was so awesome. He's just the best. Really cool. Perfect day, perfect weather, everything. Got to catch that ball. But he thought quick on his feet. He's like, That's why I'm retired, which is a great classic move. That's a dad joke, but it works.

He's a dad. But if he catches that ball, that is the coolest moment of ever. Oh, yeah.

He should have brought a glove. Yeah. I was trying to get him to get in a bat.

Foul ball guy would make that grab.

But he's one of those... There's a lot of sports figures you look up to or you idolize or you put on a pedestal, he's one guy that you can because he is just the best dude ever. He actually... So at this party, this is how cool of a dude Anthony Rizzo is. At this party on Saturday night, I talked to these two guys came up to me and they're like, Hey, big AWL has been listening from the beginning. I was like, How do you guys know Rizzo? He was like, Rizzo, we housed Rizzo when he was a minor leagre in Portland, Maine.

That's cool.

14 years ago, and Rizzo invited them out, the whole family out for his retirement. That's awesome. Isn't that insane? That's awesome. It's very, very cool. He's like, Yeah, Rizzo has kept in touch with us ever since. All we did was, that's what minor leaguers, the families house different players. He's kept in touch with us ever since. He's always made us feel included. Just an awesome dude. Yeah.

Also, it's very cool that he's retiring as a cub and just being like, Yeah, this is where my heart is. This is where my home is.

Yeah, I think he's doing some ambassador work. It's cool that the cubs are not fucking this one-off.

Bad first pitch, though. That's why he's retired.

Yeah, that's why he's retired. That's why he's retired. Okay, my other who's back is boxing because that Bud Crawford-Canela fight was awesome. I don't know if you guys are able to watch. I watched in the morning because I could not. It started so late.

I saw the highlights of it. It was an ass-kicking.

Yeah, it was awesome. Boxing might be back unless- Rigged? Not rigged.

Oh, one of the undercards, maybe. Oh, what are you talking about? The stoppage in the undercard?

Is that what you're talking about?

Are you talking about Aiden Rolls getting the phone call? He had a million-dollar wager on Canela, and then he got a phone call right before the fight. He was like, You got to switch your bet on some unnamed guy.

He's got one of those calls.

Well, Crawford is really good.

That's your speculation on maybe rig. That's the only-Okay.

And Canelo is old.

I don't know how you would rig that, though. If you're talking about the judges, everybody that watched that was like, Yeah, Crawford won. That was the right decision.

Yeah, I don't think Canelo would take a dive. He's a pretty proud guy. But either way, boxing back until Mike Tyson fights someone.

I think he's fighting Mayweather. Mayweather, yeah. Yeah, can't wait. Did you see him give a punch to Mr..

Beast and almost knock Mr. Beast out? Just a body punch?

It was awesome. It's going to be the worst fight ever.

Yeah. But hey, if it's on Netflix, it'll be free, right?

That'll be cool. Yeah.

That'll be cool. All right, Zack.

My Who's Back in the Week is the Colts owner Carly Ursay, because she was not only on the sidelines again this week, headphones in, listening to every play call, and with the notepad, taking down notes. She's also seen with a massive Cuban link chain on, which I thought was a wild move from an owner. It looked very powerful. I just wanted to say that she looks like a force to be reckoned with on the sideline today.

I like that. Zack, is she single?

I believe maybe married.

Okay. Looks like a ring.

No, I was going with the massive chain she's rocking here in this photo. Well? It looked powerful. I wasn't sure if she was coming out as a debut artist, maybe dropping an R&B album or if she was just trying to access her on.

It's like a Carly, Justin Jefferson train.

Carly, if you're single? Similar. Zack is single? Imagine Zack owned the cults.

That'd rock.

We'd still make you do the podcast.

I would want nothing more. Okay. I love being here.

That would be Very funny if you had a helicopter in the game. Zack just walking behind her on the sideline.

Helicopter, maybe most unsafeest way to travel.

Submarine.

Never mind. I retract.

I don't know. I'm just throwing out other ways. You threw that out there.

James Cameron is pretty good on a sub.

The Challenger? The Rocket, the Challenger? That has to be one of the most unsafe ways, right?

There's three-wheelers cars. They look pretty unsafe. Oh, Yeah. Slingshots? Yeah.

I saw a guy in my neighborhood riding one of those around like just as... He just was like, What are you doing, dude?

I would say an old guy, too. Number one most unsafe way to travel, catapult.

Catapult. Yeah. Catapult, definitely high up there. Hot air balloon?

Yeah, fuck that.

Hot air balloon would be very unsafe.

Did I ever tell you about the hot air balloon accident? No. I went on a hot air balloon when I was living in Texas. And then a year later, that same hot air balloon went up in the air, crashed. Deadliest hot air balloon accident in the history of the United States. And the guy that was the pilot was my pilot, and he was loaded up on nine different drugs. Yeah. Never again. Hot Air Balloon.

Shush.

Never again. Never again.

Do you guys have any picks? Oh, Zack, do you want to say anything about the Bucks game? Bucks, Texans?

I'm looking forward to Bucks going to play in Texans. I don't want to say too much.

I don't want to over-What's the numbers? Three.

You're a piece of shit.

Twenty-two. Zack feels a little embarrassed that I used him as a Trojan horse in that conversation.

Sixty-seven.

Zack, I would like to hear your thoughts on the game real Not too many thoughts.

I just wanted to go there. I wanted to get a win. Just kidding. Three. There we go.

Are you going to watch the Stephen Chey?

Yeah, I love to watch the game. Twenty.

Okay. 33.

You got to win, Zack, for my pinkie. You got to win.

We're going to put such an effort for your pinkie. You got to win.

For both of them.

Texans.

What's your number, Memes?

20. Brees Hall.

You had a hell of a game today. Yeah.

He'll probably be a chief.

Did you say your number, PFT?

67.

Hank, everyone do it again.

22.

99, put.

33.

64.

19.

76.

Good luck, Shane. Any thoughts on the chargers real quick? Hope we win. Bolt up. Yeah.

93. Does someone have 93? No. 93. Love you guys.