Transcript of Joe Buck In Studio, Bears Lose MNF, CFB Talk + Guys On Chicks

Hey, Pardon My Take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Get the crew together and head off to the course in the new 2024 Chevy Traverse. With impressive cargo room, three-room seating, and the first-ever Z71 trim, Traverse can handle your buddies and their golf bags with ease. Chevrolet, together, let's drive. On today's Pardon My Take, we're going talk some college football. It's Wednesday. We're also going to talk Monday night football, the bears suck again. We have a little cleanup of week one in the NFL. We also have our very good friend Joe Buck in studio Joe. Awesome interview with Joe. Nine-time AWLs know the Joe Buck. You can't tell the history of Pardon My Take without Joe Buck, and it was great having him in studio, catching up with him. Really great time with him. We're going to bring back guys on Chicks Hot seat, cool thrown. Great Wednesday show for you. It's all brought to you by DraftKings. Your season, your shot. The NFL season is rolling. Every countdown can bring you closer to a payout with DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NFL.

Every game is another chance to cash in. Don't just watch the action. Win with it. Draftkings Sportsbook delivers the unmatched intensity of the NFL right to your fingertips, from first TD score to anytime TD props or the thrill of live in-game betting. Every snap is loaded with opportunity. Let's see, what do we got? Thursday night, what's the line in the game?

It is still three and a half.

Three and a half. Packers minus three and a half. That's Thursday night football. Remember, we just turned around and it's football again. That's the beauty of football season. So new customers, this one is for you. Bet just $5 and get $200 in bonus bets instantly, plus score over $200 off Sunday NFL Sunday ticket from YouTube and YouTube TV. Your season's heating up. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app. Use code take. That's code Taked to get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you place your first $5 bet, plus over $200 off NFL Sunday ticket from YouTube and YouTube TV in partnership with DraftKings. The Crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800 Gambler. In New York, call 877-8openY or text Hope & Y 467-369. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg. Org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort in Kansas, fees may apply in Illinois. 21 and over. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. See sportsbooked@draftkings. Com/promos. Nfl Sunday ticket offer for new subscribers only in Ottawa news until canceled. Digital games and commercial use excluded. Restrictions apply.

Additional NFL Sunday ticket terms at youtube. Com/go/nflsundaytickets-terms. Limited time offer. Okay, let's go. Hey, football guy.

Hey, Welcome to Part of My Take, presented by DraftKings.

Your season's heating up. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code take. That's code take to get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you place your first $5 bet. Plus over $200 off NFL Sunday ticket from YouTube and YouTube TV in partnership with DraftKings. The Crown is yours. Today is Wednesday, September 10th. I got to be honest, guys, we did a really bad job of not talking a lot about the Bills and Ravens game. That was what a game.

It was an incredible thing. What a game. Talked about a fourth-quarter collapse.

Oh, man, what a game.

I don't think we'll see anything like that this year.

Because we were recording, and we should have probably stopped and watched the end of the game, but we did it live. Josh Josh Allen had 251 yards in the fourth quarter alone.

I did go home on Sunday night. And in case you guys thought that I didn't watch enough football on Sunday, I watched the entire fourth quarter. Same. Phyllis Ravens on my couch. And it was incredible that Josh Allen was able to do what he did. Now, granted, the Ravens did choke it away. The punning, I get all that. The fumble was a big thing.

Not going forward on fourth and two.

Not going on on fourth and two is insane. You're the Baltimore Ravens.

But also, fourth and two, you're backed up in your own territory. Your defense is going to be pissed off, probably. If you go 4 and 4 and 2, you're going to be like, What the fuck do you do? You don't trust it. In the moment, when I was watching it, not live, but when I was rewatching it live, I thought to myself, I can see the Ravens punning here. The bigger thing was the Derrick Henry fumbling. Yeah, the Derrick Henry fumbling. That's I don't know what the difference in the game was, but this is a John Harbaugh loss. He's got several of them. I saw the stat that he's got more double-digit losses than any coach since 1991. Double-digit meaning like double-digit leads that were shown. That's a misleading stat because have to be a very good coach to get that record, not only to build a double-digit lead, but also to coach long enough to get that record. But it does feel like he does something like that every year, whether it's like, Oh, you forgot that you had a running game, or, Why did you punt there, or your running back fumbled or your defense didn't play anything resembling your defense from last year, especially when it counted.

But Josh Allen played awesome, just unstoppable.

He looks like he's playing the game on easy mode, and that was maybe game of the year in week one. That was I mean, I still can't believe the Bills won that game. Yeah, he looks like he's playing on easy mode. I know there was a discussion of whether he should have won the MVP or Lamar Jackson. I know it obviously doesn't matter what happens week one, but that did feel like a statement. 251 yards passing in the fourth quarter is just... He was just dicing them up. That's why you have to go for it on fourth and two. I know what you're saying, but there's just no... Like, Josh Allen was that good. It doesn't matter. The Bills, maybe their defense gets fixed, but Josh Allen is playing at such a high level I don't know. That's pretty much our week one recap.

There's some other cleanup that we should get to, too. Yeah. Week one.

The bears fucking suck again. Monday Night Football was not fun. Obviously, that was a joke, guys. I know everyone was like, Hey, the bear's got to start the show. That was a little tongue and cheek that we didn't clean up the Bill's Ravens game. The bears do not look any better this year than last year. Caleb Williams does not look any better. It was sloppy. It was gross. I would say the only thing that was a plus was that I actually knew we were streaming it, and I said it when the pick six happened. I was like, This game is 17 to 6, but it's way closer than we realized because we're one Viking's shutdown away from this being a tight, tight game. The Bear's offense couldn't do anything outside of the first drive. Penalties everywhere. Ben Johnson didn't have a great debut. The defense tried their absolute hardest in the first half. Had JJ McCarthy in hell. Credit to JJ McCarthy for coming out of hell and looking awesome in the fourth quarter. But yeah, the bears are bad, and it's looking more like a four-win team, and Caleb Williams is just not good.

I don't know if you can say they look just as bad as last year. There were some times last year when they looked real unfixable.

They didn't improve on an improved roster, and that's really more on Caleb than anything. He didn't look better than what he looked last year. He's not reading the field well. If you watch the DJ more miss, that was such a clear sign. If he gets to his progression so late. He's looking in the flat, he sees DJ more late, he tries to make a throw late, and it just airmails over it. The first drive, which was fun to watch, it wasn't like the first drive outside of the Roma Dunes day pass on the sideline, which was a great pass. It wasn't like they were so sharp and hitting everyone. It was a lot of Caleb scrambling and check downs, which I guess credit for hitting the check downs. But yeah, he's not good right now. I don't know if he'll ever be good, but I'm not going to pretend that he was like, Oh, I saw a lot there that was very exciting. It was very similar to last year where he doesn't feel like he's reading the field, and it feels like the ball's late a lot of guys.

Yeah, it sucked. Here's what I saw from Caleb, especially in the first half. In the second half, it didn't go well. The two misthrows that he had in the fourth quarter, one to DJ, the other, I think, was to Roma Dunzé, where he just like, I don't even know who he was really passing the ball to because it went just so far out of bounds. But in the first half, I saw him getting to his check downs and making the decision to scramble way faster than last year, where he would take sacks last year.

But that doesn't mean he's reading the whole field. He's He's not good right now. I'm not going to pretend that he's good. Hopefully, he still becomes good, and you can't overreact fully to one week. But it wasn't... Watching this, I wasn't like, Oh, my God, he's fixed, or he sees it. He's not good right now.

I overreacted to that past Roma Dunzé in the first quarter. I did.

Oh, it was a great pass.

Because he threw the fuck out of the ball. It was a great pass. It was a laser beam. His scrambling was pretty good, too. It all went to shit. Everything bad happened to the bears in the Scrambling doesn't mean shit.

You got to be able to throw the ball in the NFL.

The fourth down on the second or third drive, too, that was bad.

Really bad. Missed wide open guys. Troy was saying it all night. He's just not seeing the field. It's frustrating to watch. I think overall, the defense was awesome in the first half. The pass rush was awesome in the first half. It obviously fated because you can't expect your defense to be that good the entire game. Brian Floor has also coached a great game in the that he rope-a-dope the bear. Yeah, he did. He didn't blitz a lot in the first half, then he dialed it up in the second half. I've been saying for a year, like Kairosantos, nice guy, you can't survive in the NFL with a kicker who doesn't have a leg more than 50 yards. You saw it in the time situation at the end of the game where he was told to kick it out of bounds or out of the end zone. I don't think he has the leg to kick it out of the end zone. I don't know why Ben Johnson didn't tell him to kick it out of bounds because it's only a five-yard difference.

We discovered a loophole in the NFL rulebook yesterday, which is even if you just kick the ball forward like a foot, you just move it off the tee. You breathe on the ball and knock it forward. The penalty is going to be illegal procedure. You get the ball on the 40-yard line. The clock stops, zero seconds run off the clock. Correct. Should have kicked it out of bounds. As opposed to try to kick it through the end zone and then have the head coach of the other team actually giving on the field coaching, be like, Yes, I approve of this return. Please run it out. That was a mistake by Ben Johnson. Jj McCarthy, gamer? Dude-is he the number one gamer that we got right now?

I was super impressed with JJ McCarthy. I know the pick six was really, really bad because it was. It was probably the easiest pick six ever. But he was in absolute torture in the first half. He looked like the moment was way too big for him. And the way he bounced back and the way he played in that fourth quarter, that was also the painful part, is the Vikings have a guy. I saw it with my two eyes. I was like, this is what a winning quarterback looks like. And yeah, he's still a rookie, so there'll be some ups and downs. But if you're a Vikings fan, you have to be pumped with what you saw in that fourth quarter, especially how the first half went.

Is JJ McCarthy, is he eligible for Rookey of the Year, like in the NBA? I don't know. In your second year if you don't play?

I'm not sure.

We got to get to the bottom of that. But yeah, I think he's become the number one gamer now in the NFL. It's like, well, yeah, as bad as things can look, He's just going to figure out a way to win.

He's lost three football games in his life since high school.

So going back to high, didn't he lose... How many did he lose in college? He lost one or two.

I think two. I think two, or maybe only one.

It was interesting to watch him after the game because his teammates were more fired up than he was with him. They were so happy for him.

Yeah, he lost one in college. He lost to Michigan, I believe, his sophomore year. He got the shit kicked out him by Georgia. Or, sorry. They beat Ohio State. You had the Georgia game down in Florida. So, yeah, he's lost three games total as a starter. In the Vikings, the The Vikings, the only silver lining I have for how bad that bears game went is that the Vikings might be really good. Remember, this is a 14-win team from last year, starting a rookie quarterback. Their roster is very, very good. You could see when they could to run the ball and lean on him with Jordan Mason and Aaron Jones. Everything opened up for JJ. So yeah, the Vikings are good. The bears are bad. The bears are going to get their asses kicked by the lions in a get-right game in week two. I don't know what they do. It has to look better sooner than later with Caleb. Otherwise, I don't know what you do.

I had a very mean dream last night, Big Cat. Okay. Very mean dream. It was like the troll brain was activated while I was asleep. I dreamt that in a surprise to you, we had Ryan Whitney on to preview the NHL today and that you destroyed the studio. You lit the studio on fire.

Listen, Witt is well within his right to dance on my grave right now. I texted him last night. I was like, I give up. You win. Connor McDavid is going to win a Stanley Cup. And he's like, Yeah, but he's going to do it somewhere besides Edmonton because you ran him out of Edmonton. I was like, Yeah, you're right. I did. I did do that. But no, it has every right to shit on me.

I do have a question about Caleb and his attire. People were shitting on the long, gray shirt last night. What are your thoughts? I have a thought.

My only thought is I need him to be better at football.

Yeah, that's an approach. Hank, what are your thoughts? You're the fashion guy.

It was gross. It was very PFT-esque. It looked like he just got dressed in the dark. It was his shot?

Yeah.

Because I liked it. Yeah, there was no thought on his swagger or his look. It was like he was wearing his pregame shirt and just threw his jersey on over it.

I saw Caleb and I was like, I like that. Look good, feel good. I like that look for him because it tells me that he doesn't give a fuck what he looks like.

That's a bad thing.

As a quarterback, I want you to just go out there and just be focused on football.

But then he does the painting his nails, which means he clearly cares about his fashion and stuff. He considers himself, I think, a fashionable, dressy guy.

Dressy? He does wear dresses, yes.

And fashion shit. It's not like he shows up just wearing jeans and a T-shirt every game.

Right. I don't know. I saw it and I was like, I like the fact that he might not give a fuck what people say about how he looks.

He's not good right now. It doesn't matter. He could wear nothing. He's just not good. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. I'm not going to be like, Oh, I saw a little bit that first drive. No, he's got to be better. You're the first overall pick. You have to be better. And I'll How am I going to say this? I think I was at a zero % Bayesian meter going into the game. It's not crazy, but it's maybe a two % right now.

You're thinking about it.

It's a two % Bayesian meter. The Bayesian meter woke up. It was like, Whoa, this thing is going on? Yeah. What's this?

Yeah, but you got to think with a coach like Ben Johnson, he can find a way to make... If there's anyone that's going to be able to mask his flaws and make it work. The one thing that Troy even kept saying, which is true, is with Ben Johnson and Jared Goff, they were not throwing the ball deep. They were just getting the ball to their skill players and getting him in space. He was missing those throws. There was a couple of them where he was just throwing screens behind the line of scrimage, and they were bad throws, and they couldn't even get going.

And hospital passes like DJ Moore. Poor DJ Moore. The fact that he came back in the game after that collision, that was that moment there was just a car crash. Yeah. Yeah.

Even some of his biggest plays were like, put your guys in harm's way. Yeah.

A lot of his biggest plays were scrambles, which was nice, but again, you have to be able to throw the ball. I guess, again, the two silver linings I have going is the Vikings might be really good. I did on the stretch with the guys. I went through the entire schedule, and my official prediction was seven wins. It's probably more like five now, maybe. But it wasn't like I was going into this season being like, This is a 10, 11-win team that's going to go to the playoff.

What were you thinking in the first or second quarter?

No, I'm being totally honest. First drive was awesome, but it was so quickly not good. You know what I mean? The bears with competent quarterback play should have won that game by double digits because the way they had the Vikings reeling in the first half, they just didn't capitalize. So I was very quickly like, Hey, that first drive was cool, but we're not moving the ball at all now. And yeah, there was the one, the Darnell Wright hold that wasn't a hold could have maybe changed because That was a big play. That was a play that essentially went from... It would have been first in 10 on the 18 to whatever it was, second or third in 20, and then Kyro misses the field goal. That was a pretty big fuck up in terms of the call, but you can't blame a ref for a game where you have a lead at home and you give up 21 points in the fourth quarter and your offense can't do dick.

Yeah, the defense was pretty bad, especially against the deep balls to Justin Jefferson. Losing the running back on a starter route, I don't put that in the linebacker. That's a good play call.

Yeah, we did have some guys out in an injury, but it doesn't matter. It's like you can't make excuses. At the end of the day, if Caleb plays, I don't 25% better, they probably win the game. And he didn't play well. That's the reality of it. You got to just be truthful about it. That's the reality of it. It's year two. I would like to see Ben Johnson have a little bit more confidence to because the clock was a fuck up at the end. The penalties were a mess, but hopefully, he figures it out. I have all my trust in Ben Johnson. That's all my eggs are in the Ben Johnson basket.

I've got JJ McCarthy on Tebo Watch. He It feels like early stages Tebo, where it's like things go poorly for him, but guess what? He's going to figure out a way to win, and he's going to drive people insane watching because they'll be like, This guy stinks. Oh, wait, this guy's actually really good.

We also have some cleanup on that college stat. He ICU was his only loss as a starter, but he also had two losses his freshman year. But he split both of those games.

Got it.

He didn't technically start, but he played in all of those games.

That was some good cleanup. Yeah.

That was good cleanup. Then going back to high school, he just kicked the shit out of everybody?

Yeah, but everyone kicks the shit out of everybody in high school. Everyone says that about Trevor Lawrence.

Did you guys see the tweet yesterday? It was like, How often are Max and memes in your ear while you're recording PMT? That was weird.

The amount of times I say stupid shit just to the normal microphone, why would I be in your ear for anything?

I think someone thought we, PFT, wear earpieces and you guys give us lines to say?

What lines would they give us?

The beauty of this show is it's all out. You guys are just talking heads. It's all out there. All the stupidity that we just put into your head every single morning, it's there.

We're just beautiful people. Hank's right. We're beautiful people that just sit behind a desk, max and memes, write the whole show. We're industry-planned. We're puppets. They wanted two beautiful faces to deliver the sports news to you, so they chose us.

All right, so just to wrap up, I would say Blame pie, 90% Caleb, 9% Ben Johnson, and Kyro Santos.

No.

Actually, no. Yeah, you're right. So 80% Caleb, 10% Kyro, 9% Ben Johnson, 1%...

Say memes. Just blame it on memes.

Anyone want to talk here? Anyone want to talk? Anyone want to talk? Ben Johnson should get more blame.

How bad do you think that challenge was?

I still don't really understand. I feel like he punched the ball out.

His knee was down.

I know. No, but he didn't get touched.

Let's watch the replay.

I still don't really understand that play.

There was a couple of penalties that were weird.

Yeah, I still don't understand that play. He punched the ball before he got touched.

I think 1% Joe Buck.

Yeah. No. If the ball is part of your body.

I don't know.

I thought maybe- A coach should know.

Yeah, a coach should know. Anyone else want to take a %? You think Ben Johnson get more memes? Yeah, he was the fourth down guy in the lines. Go for it more. Who cares? Just let it rain. I do. All right. So yeah, I'll put a little bit more because I do think that Ben Johnson did the thing. You have to coach the team you have. You don't have the lions anymore. Probably should have just taken the three to start the game. When they went for it on fourth and 3. Then if you're going to go on on fourth and 3 the first time, go for it the second time. Be consistent. Consistency is what we always talk about, where if you're going to be aggressive, be aggressive all the time because eventually it will work out or take the points guy. I lean towards this team and the way they're built, probably just take the points because you know you have a limited quarterback. So maybe a little bit more on Ben Johnson, but is there anyone who wants to take 1% here?

I'll take a 1% for sure. Oh, wow.

Okay. Why?

Because there wasn't adequate software for you for Monday Night Football, for the bears-vikings game. And that's on me.

So at halftime, it's going well. Not great, but it's going well. Went to get my ice cream. Ice cream machine was off. Monday Night Football. First week one. What happened? Bears.

The ice cream machine wasn't on and fully stocked. That's 100 % what happened. And And they went to get ice cream for halftime, and there wasn't ice cream.

What happened, though?

Why was it off? It wasn't stuck. So there's levels to the mix that you put in there. When we leave... Okay, let me get this down. You got When we leave at night time, we flip it to where it goes into standby mode to keep the mix food safe. When it goes into standby mode, it can also be ran because it throws the snowflakes on to keep it food safe. So you can pull ice cream from the machine through the night if you would like ice cream. But it was in double do not... It went into do not draw, which is the handle. So then you couldn't even draw ice cream.

Do not draw. I went in at halftime to go get my ice cream, and I saw do not draw.

Zack?

Deplorable.

I actually put zero % blame on you, Zack. I feel bad for the cream team because I did text them. I was like, Hey, what's the deal with the ice cream? They're like, We fucked up.

Zack's not the only member of the cream team either.

No, it's Jacob as well and Owen. They just kept apologizing on text, and I kept on being like, It's not your guy's fault. The bear's The ice cream has nothing to do with the bear sucking and Kael Williams not being good at quarterback. What about the field?

Can you blame the field? Why does Soulja Field do this?

That was going to be my hot to be.

Because the city owns the fucking stadium and the park district owns a stadium, and they do six concerts a week before the first game every single year. And this is why they're moving to Arlington Heights. It's a joke. It's an absolute joke.

I was going to take 1%. I was on I was on the field for Oasis.

Yeah, so that's your fault. Yeah, your weight did that.

The good news is that I'm sure that the international rugby game between the New Zealand All Blacks and Ireland that's taking place, I believe on a Saturday, isn't going to have any effect on Soulja Field.

They do this every single year. We're right before the season starts. Hey, let's just... It was seven concerts in two weeks.

I'll say one nice thing, one very nice thing. They had the best national anthem maybe I've ever seen last night.

Jim Corneliuson is a legend.

It was absolutely incredible. From the second he opened his mouth, the very first O, I was sucked in. Then the F-35 flyover was very nice.

You know what I said on Sunday? If you're a Dolphins fan, it's never bad that the number to his cap is being floated around week one. The sign for the bears as I turned to Eddie in the fourth quarter, I was like, How many standalone games do we have still? I was like, Can we flex? And we cannot flex, I think, any of them.

How many do you have?

Three more. Non-flexible.

That's not as bad as last year. Actually, four more. Every week, it was like, More bears. Get ready, America.

There's four more. One of them is flexible. So Commanders, Monday Night Football, which that actually okay because it's a double header. So people can watch something else. And then Eagles, Black Friday, packers on a Saturday, and then the 49ers, Sunday Night Football, which will undoubtedly be flexed.

I think you're being very, very down about the bears because you just saw them. It was on national TV. If this happened in the middle of a Sunday, if this happened 1: 00 PM Sunday, you'd be down, but I don't think you'd be like, Caleb sucks, Ben Johnson sucks.

I don't think I'm being down. I think I'm being realistic. Caleb does not look better. He looked bad. That's just a fact. You have to say it. Otherwise, I'm just fooling myself. He looked bad. I hope he gets good, but he looked bad. And that's a game that... Don't you agree that game with an adequate quarterback play, you win that game.

I agree. I think he was a big part of the reason why I lost. But I also think that knowing you, it was like you had Monday night football. It was week one. It's all the pressure in the world You spend the entire week thinking, what if we suck ass in primetime again? Then people just keep talking to me about how Caleb Williams sucks. That's what you're going through right now, and that's okay. Feelings are never wrong, Big Cat.

No, but I'm not.

But I also think that if If you look at it from a bigger perspective, it's not as bad as you say it is.

But it's not. When people say now that Caleb is bad, it doesn't hurt me anymore. It hurt me last year because I was hoping that there was going to be... I was like, Oh, the coaching staff, all this, that. You can't argue against that right now. From what we've seen in the NFL from him, he doesn't see it.

It's not there. You can get treatment for dyslexia if that's what it is. That's HIPAA. That's why JJ... I did say it was HIPAA. But that's That's why JJ's parents were so brilliant. It doesn't matter if he's got dyslexia. He can still spell his name.

That's HIPAA, and you should be arrested. That's HIPAA. That's HIPAA. Any other cleanup from the NFL?

It was a fun Sunday. It was a fun Sunday.

Anything else?

You could win next week.

Oh, Howie's back.

I think that's just such a Detroit Lion's get-right spot.

What does that even mean? You can't have a get-right spot to start the season. It's a whole new team.

Well, No, it's not a whole new team.

But it is. Every year is a new team. Every year is a new team with new coaches. You don't know what the lions are this year. It's week one. You guys played a very good Vikings team to the end. They got their shit kicked out of them by a very good packers team. You have no idea.

If this happened at 1: 00 PM, I think Big Cat would be down, but I don't think he'd be like, Oh, we fucking suck again.

But hold on. I don't know about that. Thank you, Hank. It's not that the bears lost. Caleb does not look any better. That's the problem. A lot of coachable moments in this game. It's almost better to lose week one. But do you guys see what I'm saying?

Tell me about the coachable moments, James.

It has nothing to do with the actual outcome of the game. It's like, if they had lost and Caleb looked awesome, I would not be sitting here being like, damn, the bears suck. They're going to lose every game. They stink. They can't win a game. It's the fact that he did not look any better than last year.

There were three or four throws that he had that if you watch the Manning cast, Peyton Manning's face afterwards tells you everything you need to know. That's my point. Where he was just like, Uh-oh.

That's what we had going into this season. It's like everything is there for him. If he gets better, the bears could be a decent team. If he doesn't get better, They will not be good. I did not see him get any better. Hopefully, he gets maybe next week. It's totally different. I'll obviously rally the troops and be like, Yeah, let's go. But as of right now, you can't make a statement otherwise. You can't be like, He's going to get better.

Is that fair? I think that Dan Campbell is maybe the most dangerous guy when it comes to a revenge game. It feels like this might be a revenge game.

Yeah, Howie is up to it again.

Howie, he did it again, Max. Fucking Howie. Wait, is this a good fucking Howie or a bad fucking Howie?

This is an, I guess, fucking Howie.

Oh, like Howie was bored, so he made a trade.

I feel like that was going to be your take.

It's a fucking Howie question mark.

It's like fucking Howie. Somebody distract Howie because he's going to keep trading. Trading.

He just needs another running back. Yeah, he was just like, I got to do something with my hands.

Yeah, that's what it feels like.

Is he addicted to trades?

I don't know. There was a lot of things that you could have seen that you need improvement from in week one. I didn't see running back on that list.

Yeah. What was the logic behind it?

I don't know. But I mean, he's a good player. I think what happens is- The player is Tank Bigsby, by the way. Yeah, Tank Bigsby is a good player. I think what happens is there There are teams out there that are like, Okay, I want to move on from this player, and how he doesn't give a fuck about what he needs. He looks at that and is like, Is this a good player, yes or no? If it's a good player, I will go try and make that trade, whether I need that position or not. Which I guess is what you want from your GM. You want to see value. He thinks that Tank Bigsby is more valuable than what the Jags were asking for, so he went and got him, whether the Eagles need him or not.

It was like a buy-low opportunity for him where it's like, Tank Bigsby might have lost the running back competition, so his stock is pretty low right now. But that doesn't mean that he's a bad player.

Also, great name. Awesome name. First-team all name. That name bumps him up big time in terms of excitement for the trade. Tank Bigsby.

You can win with that. But how many more wins is Tank Bigsby going to give the Eagles?

Probably like one and a half.

I guess it depends. There will be a Tank Bigsby game. If Saquon gets hurt.

Maybe he's the new... Who was the guy? Boston Scott. Was that the guy that just killed the Giants? Yeah, that was the Maybe Tank Bigsby is just going to have awesome games against the Giants this year.

I wanted to say that we could beat the Giants regardless.

Yeah, I'd say so. Although Jackson Dart might be the starter.

No, I think didn't Dable come out yesterday. He said, We're sticking with Russ for the movie. Oh, he did? Yeah, I think he said Russ is going to be the starter this week.

Okay, so he's going to... Jackson Dart will be the starter soon. Yeah.

I still think- It's week two, and you already are proclaiming a starter. I feel like it's going to be right after that Chief's game. Was it Chargers at Home? Yeah. Yeah, that's what I've got circled. But yeah, if you're taking two days to announce your starter in week two, that means that that guy is not going to be your starter much longer. Yeah.

Okay. What else we got? Anything? Hank, how are you feeling? Good? You love football?

Last time was fun, yeah.

These are the hardest days to get through, the Tuesdays and the Wednesdays.

Yeah, without action, it's very difficult. It just feels like I'm going to go home tonight and just be like, Wait, where's the football?

Yeah. Where's the football? I might rewatch. I might grind small 22.

Are you feeling nervous, excited for Thursday night?

Again, since it's a short week, I think that the packers need to do the right thing by their players and rest Micah Parsons. Thursday night football is dangerous. Injury report? He was. He's got an injured right wrist, which is, coincidentally, what I get after I watch Jaden Daniels' film.

Also, his mom doesn't let him date girls.

Well, no, that's not true. That's not true, Big Cat. That's not true. That's fake news. That was a quote that was taken from when he was in college still. Got it. He's cleared for girls.

Oh, he is? Yeah.

System's hot.

Is his right wrist okay?

His right wrist is fine. My understanding is it's fine. It's just a booboo. It's just a booboo. He's got a booboo. He's got a little booboo. And he'll be okay. Yeah, I'm a little bit nervous about the packers. It's a good game. I'll be honest. Packers are a great team. They looked awesome in which one. We looked good. We didn't look awesome.

Just a A little booboo. All right, let's talk some college football. Before we do that, let's talk about game time. Can you look up that game? See what the prices are for the commanders and packers?

Also, speaking of injuries, this would be a good time to break out. There's been an uptick in dogs breaking news on Twitter recently. Shout out Ricky Scoops. He nailed the Micah Parsons news. This was Leroy's thing. He retired from the game when he died. But I think I'm training Blake to become an injury expert because he's had three surgeries so far. So he's pretty much an expert on anything related to joint problems. So pro football dog is something I'm considering deploying with Blake. He wants to start Breaking News. So he might have to dive into Jaden Daniels wrist, and he'll let you know what he thinks. Okay.

Yeah, that was good. He could maybe go on the McCaffrey beat.

Yeah.

The Niners are just injured again. They are. It was out for a while.

The Niners have surprise injuries that you don't hear about during the game. And then afterwards, it's like, Oh, yeah, this guy's hurt, too. Yeah, McCaffrey's hurt. Trent Williams got bumped out of the game. And then Kittle with the ham string. I feel like that's one where it's really annoying if you're George Kittle.

Purdy also hurt.

Purdy also hurt. Purdy's hurt? Yeah, he's on the list.

That's right. So Mac Jones might have to start, right?

Oh, boy. Oh, God. Oh, boy.

Dear God. Oh, boy. The NFL sucks. Yeah.

That's early for the Niners to have this.

Yeah. It's like having a beer before noon. It's a little early in the season to have Mac Jones.

Yeah. It's week two to have these guys. Okay, game time. The NFL is back. Tailgates pack stands the buzz before kickoff, but getting in nightmare. Cues, price jumps, getting logged out mid-click. All you want is to be there, beer in hand, losing your voice with the crowd. The Game Time app gives the advantage back to fans. The hack for unlocking amazing tickets and experiences in a few tabs. It's incredibly easy to use. The game time guarantee means you can trust you'll get 100% authentic tickets on time at the best price. Plus, fees are always included. So what you see is what you pay. We're looking at tickets for Packers Commanders.

Yes, Packers Commanders, Thursday Night Football. You can get into Lambo for $156.

Okay.

Catheral.

So take the guess. We're going to buy NFL tickets with Game Time. Download the Game Time app, create an account, Use code PMT for $20 off for first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account, redeem code PMT for $20 off. Swipe, tap, ticket, go. Download the GameTime app today. Okay, college football. By the way, speaking of college football, quickly, our good friend, Todd McShea is doing a live show tonight, Wednesday, tonight, 7: 00 at the Lincoln Hall on Lincoln in Lincoln Park. I am going to be his guest, so you could still buy a few tickets. There's a few tickets still left there. If you want to come out, see us talk some ball, go buy those tickets at Lincoln Hall. Tonight, 7: 00 Eastern, sorry, Central, me and Tom McShea.

Todd. Todd. Todd.

Todd. College football. Usf is the best team in the country Resume. Debate me.

Us.

Usf.

Usf. As I said, USF.

I thought you said US, too. You said USF.

Oh, I said it? Yeah. I thought I said USF.

I think USA because I was- I meant to say USA. I actually thought of the same thing. They do have- USA. Are they the only team that's beaten two ranked opponents? I believe so. They beat Boise State, and then they beat Florida. I think you can make case. They should be ranked higher. Top 10.

Yeah. The Florida win was Billy Napier. I mean, he's just dead. He's just gone.

Does America have a spitting problem?

It does.

I think we need to learn how to keep our spit to ourselves.

It is crazy for it to be Thursday Night Football, Jalen Carter spits on Dak Prescott. You don't think that every single coach in America on that Friday morning was like, Hey, guys, you see that? Don't fucking do that. Yeah. And then they did What?

You didn't tell the whole story right there. Well, Dak Prescott really is the first one who started the spitting.

Okay, so we had two spits. Yeah.

Well, you're allowed to spit on the ground.

You are allowed to spit on the ground.

Not in someone else's direction.

Well, according to Dak Prescott, he spat on the ground because he spits a lot.

Yeah, and then he just immediately- Jalen Carter happened to be standing right in front of him at a scheduled spit time for Dak Prescott.

So what do you want him to do?

Followed by a-Not spit? A maniacal laugh right into Jalen Carter's face. That just happened to be-Oh, is there a penalty for laughing?

For having a good time? Oh, that's a flag on max.

Jaden Daniels would lead the league.

Yeah, that's true. Do you see after the game? My take on Jaden for the last year has been that he jokes and he talks to the other players so much so that they don't hit him extra hard if they've got him in the grasp and throw him on the ground. It worked twice on Sunday against Brian Burns. Then after the game, Brian Burns is like, He's too friendly during games. I don't like that. Talk to me after the game. I think he's trying to become friends with me. I think it It does work. But yes, Dak Prescott, Max, he happened to spit when Jalen Carter was standing right in front of him. That's true.

Either way- Now we've got three spits. Yeah. If you're a coach, you got to tell everyone, Hey, don't spit. Florida, then spit. Billy Napier is all but out. Usf and Alex Golesch, who's an awesome coach. He was at Tennessee before this. He was not the guy, but everyone was like, he's one of the important pieces of Tennessee and Hypel and Byron Brown. They're awesome. They have another game against Miami this weekend. I mean, if they win this one, I don't even know, but they can lose this one, and they're still the front runner to get into the college football playoff with those two wins.

If they beat Miami, they should be ranked number one. Yeah.

They're 60. 5 point dogs again. Yeah.

And they got a Geradica.

Speaking of G5, PFT, we're all we're rooting for you hard on Friday night.

I thought we were going to talk about the Bills and the Ravens again.

We can't talk about the Bills and the Ravens.

That was a crazy fourth quarter. It was incredible. In the first half, the Ravens just dominant with their run game. Didn't look like they could be stopped. Second half, I don't know what happens. I'd say fire Harbaugh.

251 yards for Josh Allen in the fourth quarter.

Unstoppable.

Unstoppable. But yeah, we were rooting hard for you on Friday night, JMU against Louisville, because it was a gateway game. If you win that game-Yeah, there's a path. There's a big path. There still is.

It is a small path. It's a little stream that you can swim in and hope it gets to Big River. But yeah, it was a good first half for the Duke's. Second half, everything went to complete shit. Louisville had some big plays, and they were just a better team.

How do you feel about the two-quarterback system?

I don't love it. I think if you've got two quarterbacks, you've got two. Okay. Because they both... Ironically, Sluka is the better runner. Then when Barnets in, you're like, Oh, it's going to be a pass.

Why is that ironic?

Because Sluka is younger. Okay. No, but that might fuck with the defense coordinator a little bit. They're like, Oh, the white guy's in. Oh, shit. He's running. What's going on? I don't mind it because, listen, you're in the second tier of college football if you're in the group of five. So, yeah, good teams have two quarterbacks a lot. Also, it probably makes it less likely that one of those guys is going to transfer after the season's over because they won't be seen as being the guy unlike what we see at... Was it Cal? Cal's quarterback? Yeah. That's probably going to be leaving. But yeah, it was a good first half. Really It got my hopes up. I blamed myself a little bit. Number one, I scheduled a dinner on a Friday night, three months ago, and I did not realize because it's Friday night, I'm like, Oh, I'm avoiding college football, I'm avoiding NFL. At the time, I scheduled it. I forgot that it was both college football and NFL. So I was at dinner for the first half checking in on the highlights. Inexcusable. Inexcusable, but we got a lead. Yeah. And so then I was like, Do I just stay at this dinner?

We were texting on the In the group text. I was like, You have to eat another dinner.

I tried to order extra dessert, and nobody at the table wanted dessert. I was like, Should we just not go anywhere? And then, You know what? Does anybody else here want to take any the blame for a J-Mu's loss? Anyone else?

Anyone else? Anyone? Zack?

I'm in for 1%.

No, it's a bad Zack. I got to do with it. Not you, Zack. You had nothing to do with it. I'll double.

I like Zack just taking 1% of blame for everything.

Zack, apologize for taking the blame. I can give it back. Okay. Okay. Anyone else? Is it me? Yeah, Max. What did I do? I watched the second half with you.

You chose to come to the bar.

Yeah, but you were there.

I don't understand how this has anything to...

I You said 1%, just 1%.

I'm not allowed to root on. I was betting on JMU with you. I know, but- I bet on JMU five times Friday night with you.

It sounds like you had a lot to do with this.

This is crazy.

You bet on them more than I did.

Would you prefer to me to bet against them?

Sometimes.

Can't exist.

Yeah, this is a can't exist.

This is a big time can't exist. This is very clearly me just looking for somebody else to get.

All right, true. I'll take 2%. There it is.

I'll take one.

You got to be a fall guy. I knew the fall guy. No, it was a bad second half. There is still a path there. We're going to need some help, but we haven't even started in conference play yet.

Mississippi State, awesome win against Arizona State. That was a crazy, crazy ending. That guy is so fast for Mississippi State.

Yeah, he is. Is Cover Zero one of those things that it works a lot, but we never hear about it when it does?

Yeah, it feels like it gets a lot of blame. Cover Zero has got a bad PR system.

It does.

It just doesn't... Yeah, that was awesome, though, for Mississippi State. They haven't had a lot to celebrate, and they've already matched their two wins from last year. So good for Mississippi State. Happy for our guy, Brandon Walker. Felt like a big, big moment. I was in Ames, Iowa on Saturday. Awesome crowd. Those two teams don't like each other. Those two teams also play the exact same football game every single year. It's Groundhogs Day. We like Grunowski because he came in here and we met him and he's a very nice kid. Is it something about the Iowa uniform that just makes it like if you're a passer?

It's a combo, I think, of the Iowa uniform and the last name just seems like an Iowa quarterback, too, doesn't it?

It just doesn't work. It doesn't work. The Iowa was supposed to be a passing team this year. They are not.

It's bad. I thought that with the Steelers scoring a shitload of points, that maybe Iowa football would catch that through the uniforms. Maybe they'd be lighted up again this year. But no, the Seyehawk game every year, it's the same thing. I bet the over just thinking it was going to be different. That was dumb. I'm an idiot for doing that. I'll never do that again until next year. But yeah, it was not a great football game. But you're right. I don't think that there's two fan bases that actually hate each other, literally hate more than Iowa and Iowa State. I think Ohio State, Michigan is close. But when I'm talking about just mean, very dirty shit, they do hate each other. They hate each other. Especially for that one week.

They hate each other a lot. It's just the classic, the state school that everyone knows and recognizes with the state and then the other one. And Iowa State being the other one, which was an awesome campus. I don't mean the other one, but that's the national perception where it's It's like a Michigan-Michigan State situation. We also had... Yeah, do you want to play this woman? This is... Kaylyn DeVore has got to be worried. I know the Alabama got right. They're going to probably smush the Badgers on Saturday. I'm fully prepared for that. But this lady is the most SEC lady ever in coming out of a convenience store, being asked what she would do if she won the Powerball. I tell you exactly what I'd do with the first 70 million. I'd pay off Calin De Boer and get him the heck out of the University of Alabama, and then I'd take whatever else it took to get rid of the AD.

I'd give him the church money.

Calin De Boer has got to be worried that- Calin DeBore. He's got to look at the paper and be like, Were there any Powerball tickets winners sold in the state of Alabama?

Yeah, it's weird because-It was Texas and Missouri.

Yeah.

It's usually California. I think California gets an outsized number of lottery tickets, but they don't care enough about football. In California. But yeah, if it's sold in Alabama, yeah, he's gone. Yeah. He's gone.

I also saw on our friend message board, genius, he posted that Florida fans are down so bad. They're like, one guy was like, I'll take Calin DeBore. That's when you get to the bad part where the SEC schools are trying to trade each other's bad coaches.

Just take Urban Meyer back. Yeah. You guys need to start cheating again.

They want Saban. Saban could coach for-Name his price.

How much What do you think Alabama would pay Saban? A lot. Okay, let's say this lady wins the powerball. First thing she does before she pays her church, she fires the AD and the head coach, Calin DeBore, buys him out. What's Saban's number?

I don't know if he has a number. He's got more money than he ever needs.

Will you do it for 100 million a year?

I think he hates the NIL and transfer portal, which is also a little bullshit. I saw that statement by him being like, The Big Ten now has all this money. It's like, You were paying The SEC was paying for years.

That would be the funiest. Let's say, Penn State doesn't live up to expectations this year, fires Franklin. Then Saban is like, I'll coach at Penn State because the Big Ten's got all the money.

The Big Ten's got all the money. Let's do it. We had Fran Brown for Syracuse for the try-hard move of the week, making his players run sprints after an overtime win over Yukon. That was so lame.

It was funny. That was so lame. It was such a try-hard move. If you're When you're going to do sprints, they've got to be longer than what were they? 20-yard sprints? Yeah. Here's my problem. The guys weren't even sprinting. No. This is how I know it's a fake try-hard move. Correct. Is because the players knew, Oh, we don't actually have to sprint. This is what he's doing instead of a postgame press conference right now. Yeah. Also to give reporters something to ask him about so he doesn't have to answer any of his stupid coaching decisions. If he was real about it, these guys would be running their asses off because a coach that would do that and mean it, they wouldn't let you leave the field until you actually sprinted.

Yeah, you got to be puking. You got to have a couple of guys puking. Also, John Matier is awesome. That Oklahoma game, I'm happy for Oklahoma fans. The way he stops and starts on a dime is so fun to watch. He has that ability where he'll, at least once or twice a game, stop and have a guy go right by him, and he made some sick passes. Bryce Underwood, this is where it's weird in college football today because everyone knows how much he's getting paid. He did not have a great game, and Michigan feels like they're in a spot where there's people calling for Saron Moore. Biff Boja, by the way, all-time football guy, is back. Did I just take another hot seat cool thrown from you? Yeah. Okay. Sorry.

It's fine. He's the all-time intern vibes.

Do you know what the greatest part about Biff Boja is? He's such a football guy. People don't know. His name? His name, He wears the cut off shirt. He was Charlotte's head coach. Do you know that he's a millionaire? Yeah. Like independently wealthy.

Like high millionaire.

High millionaire. He had a hedge fund. He traded stocks. He doesn't need to coach football. He loves football, and his name's Biff.

His last name is Poji.

Yeah.

Pretty good. Washington State might just be... That might be the number one farm system for quarterbacks in the world.

What's that? I mean, Ben Arbuckle, their OC, who is there, now is Oklahoma's He's the next up QB guy.

I also saw a couple of Michigan boosters were whispering about making calls to Sheron Moore being like, You got to let this kid off the leash. You got to let Bryce Underwood throw the ball more. Now we got millionaires telling 18-year-olds how to play the game. Tricky. What do you think about that, Big Cat? That's a tough spot we're in.

It's a tough spot. They're just kids.

As a nation, that's a tough spot.

They're just kids. Do you guys think Arch Manning is hurt?

Yes. No. Okay. This is one of my hotsy cool throws, but we can get into it. Okay. I think he was just taking a shit.

Okay, so that was what Sark said after.

I choose to believe Sark.

What about the wincing on the throws?

Yeah, he's taking a shit. My understanding, if you didn't watch the clip, Arch Manning on a couple of throws winced and made... I don't think this would qualify as a Manning face. This is like a pain face.

It looked like he was in pain.

He was in pain. And then Sark was asked about it. He says, Do people take pictures of you and show your face to everybody when you're using the bathroom going number two? Because you probably make some weird faces then, too. I think what Sark was telling us was that he shit himself when he was making these passes.

He had to shit. I also think there's a maybe It's maybe a chance Sark was saying that the writers... That's a horrible comparison. Yeah, the writer's only-Talk to Sark. The writer's only skill is taking poops.

Yeah.

Arch was born to throw a football. All you guys could do.

Yeah. You're a writer using that number two pencil. Yeah.

It's like the old, I don't come to your office and kick the dick out of your mouth.

Yeah.

Now this is on the message boards. The Sark, Texas fans are trying to find out if he's hurt or not. I'm going to do a little reading, a Wednesday reading for you. This is from a Texas fan, odd Guap. How is your deuce face, bro? Sark's comment about not filming reporters when they were taking a dump was really intriguing to me. I had some pluckers yesterday, including a sixer of fire in the hole. I recorded myself dropping a deuce after the press conference. I have no shoulder issues at all and lift heavy weights 5-6 times per week. Was very surprised to see that my face during push phase was almost identical to the face Arch makes when throwing bad passes.

Yeah, he was taking his shit.

It was identical, bro. Made me feel like a deuce for saying Arch had a shoulder issue. Three of my bros did the same and also had douce faces just like Arch. Anywho, do you guys know if your douce face is similar or identical with the Arch bad past face? If you're not sure, then do the same test that I did.

Yeah, empirical evidence.

We got to do it.

Why do you think that's a bad comparison, Hank?

Because one thing is done privately. He's basically getting mad at people for watching footage. He's like, You shouldn't be judging someone based off their reaction in a game.

You sound like a guy that's never taken a video of your own face while you shit.

We're going to need that video.

Yeah, now I haven't.

Yeah, we're going to have to see that video. Please produce that video.

But it would be like saying it would Be like saying if people reacted to a face I made on this podcast, and then me being like, Why don't people take videos of you at your cubicle? Well, you get mad. It's a different... This is a podcast that's filmed and put out. Because you get mad. You know that.

Because you get resting bitch face sometimes. I think Arch Manning might have resting shit face. Yeah, EOD.

I'm going to need it by EOD. Okay. All right? Full video. You shitting. Push face. I want to see that. Okay. We'll make a judgment off that. We're just following the press conference orders.

Yeah. I mean, you shouldn't be making this shit face against San Jose State, though.

Yeah, they came out looking bad. They obviously put it on.

Also immediately after throwing the ball.

That's a fair point by Hank.

What does that have to do with anything? I don't understand where your head's at, Hank. I mean, you know what? I'm going to take a video of Blake shitting, and you'll see his face. Same thing.

Yeah. Clems in Might be bad. I had that written down as well. They struggled with Troy. They were down 16, nothing, I believe, at one point. Had to have a weather delay, then came back. We might have bought into Dabo for no reason.

There's a lot of weather this year. There's a lot of weather. Something's going on with the weather. We need to figure this out.

That Navy game was delayed 17 times.

Yeah, something's wrong with the weather right now. Darpa, cloud seeding. I don't know what it is. They're trying to take football away from you.

Something's happened. Something's Any other college football thoughts? Illinois is good.

This weekend is going to be awesome. This weekend, I cannot wait.

I'll be in Evanston for a big noon kickoff, Northwestern, Oregon. Oregon.

That's what I was Oregon looks like the best team ever.

Well, they do. Dan Lanning, we need to just remember this. Dan Lanning might be an all-time grudge coach because he and Mike Gunde went back and forth during the week about paying players players and all this stuff. I like Dan Lanning's take because he was just like... Mike Gunde essentially was saying, Well, they pay all their players. They have all this money. Dan Lanning was like, Why should I apologize because we pay to win? But this is now two times that we've had direct Dan Lanning being questioned and then running up the score. Remember the Colorado game? Where they just absolutely destroyed him. They were going for two, I think right at the beginning of the game, they were going for four downs. We got to put a reminder out there that Dan Lanning... If anyone steps to Dan Lanning, take the other side.

I agree with that. Or take Dan Lanning. Also, weird comments by Lane Kiffin. Weird comments by Lane after the game. How so? Apologizing to the gamblers. I appreciated that. So he called a timeout before Kentucky kicked a field goal at the end of the game to cover the spread, right?

Well, Mark Stoops was like, Oh, shit, we should probably kick after the timeout.

Yeah, we should probably cover the spread. But as SVP pointed out last night, it wasn't like O'Mis was covering the spread for the entire game.

No.

So it's not like he blew the spread.

No, he's apologizing for the timeout because I think Mark Stoops then realized.

I think Lane's being too open with it right now.

I appreciate what Lane did and said, If the actual game outcome is not up for grabs, because Kentucky was never going to win that game. They were down with 15 seconds left. I'm okay with the coach being like, Hey, my bad, guys. I wish we had covered for you. I don't want to hear it if it's actually a one-score game. I wouldn't mind it, though.

I don't want to hear it if you lose either. No. I just think that Lane's being... He's being very... He's getting close to that line. I'm personally fine with it, but I know that there's going to be people that won't be fine with it.

Do you know what would have made me feel better last week when Penn State let Nevada score at the end? If James Franklin had gotten up and like, Hey, you know what? Guys, I should have put my ones back in for that last play. Because the boosters of this program and the alumni all bet Penn State every Saturday. That's my bad. We won by 40. We should have won by 47. The game was never in doubt. We got to start covering spreads.

I think I just missed the days when a coach would say it without saying it, and then I felt smart because I understood what the coach was saying. It was like, If you know, you know.

Lane Kippen has always been a spread guy. He's always Spread them. He's always been someone who's aware of it. Okay. I'm excited. Yeah, college football is going... It feels very wide open.

Yeah.

It feels very wide open. I don't know. Ohio State, obviously, is up there. Lsu, LSU should... That's the thing. Lsu, that was a huge win for LSU against Clemson. Week one, is Clemson bad? So is LSU bad?

Clemson looked like they were good-ish in week But that was such a bad...

You expect teams that lose week one, big-time programs, to just hammer the cupcakes they play the next week. Like Alabama, I think they won by 70.

Texas.

Texas. You expect that. And then, I don't know.

So this week we got South Florida, Miami, Arkansas, Ole Miss, A&M, Notre Dame.

That's a must win for Notre Dame.

Florida, LSU.

Yeah.

Then sneaky good one, Vandy, South Carolina.

Yeah.

And Wisconsin, Alabama. We don't have to watch that. I mean, you could get Calin DeBore fired this week.

Alabama was bad last year, and they 50-pieced us.

Oh, and then Georgia, Tennessee. Yeah. Forget about Georgia, Tennessee.

Georgia, Tennessee. Are you feeling good about that game, Meams? I don't know. The defense is as elite as possible. Mike Bobo just loves a wide receiver screen. He's like a naked to it. I'm so sick of wide receiver screens. Get it out of the playbook. Seriously. It works like one out of every 10 times.

It always seems like an accident. Like, holy shit, I can't believe that first guy didn't tackle him. Yeah. Like something bad happened.

A wide receiver A good wide receiver screen is minus two yards. That's where it starts. If they do a wide receiver screen and you lose two yards, you're like, That wasn't that bad. Gave him a different look. Nothing good happens from wide receiver screen.

We've also been hanging out with Gruden a lot who hates wide receiver screens more than anything. Kadek as well. More than anything, yeah.

I mean, that's two big-time football guys that I trust their opinion. Okay, let's do Hot Seat, Cool Throw, and then we get to our awesome interview with Joe Buck. We're brought to you by our friends at Reese's. With its Perfect combination of chocolate and peanut butter. There's nothing really like a Reese's peanut butter cup. I was eating a bunch of them on Sunday. I love them so much.

And the sticks.

Chocolate, peanut butter, went with the ice cream, went without the ice cream.

I broke up one of the I mixed it in with the ice cream. So good.

So, so good. Reese's is my favorite snack. It really is the perfect... I think it's my one-one candy. It's the perfect candy. It's a perfect snack. It's chocolate, it's peanut butter. Shop Reese's peanut butter cups, now at a store near you, found wherever candy is sold. I'm going to have to eat a couple this afternoon. Hot Sea Cool Tarone is also brought to you by Body Armor. Do we have a flash IV? Can we get a Flash IV? This segment is brought to you by Body Armor, Flash IV. Flash IV delivers faster, longer-lasting hydration with over 2,000 milligrams of electrolytes and no artificial dies, flavors or sweeteners like those other drinks. So whether you're Training, traveling, or just feeling the heat. Work hard, hydrate hard with Body Armor, Flash IV, and grab yours today at your local 711 convenience store. Body Armor, Flash IV. Grab yours today. Here we go. Got to go. Got to go. Tropical punch. I'll take a sip. That's delicious. That is delicious. All right, Hank.

My hot two is Ben Simmons.

Why?

What?

He got dropped by his agent. In a world where it seems like NBA players get... Guys that don't play more than 10 minutes a game get three years, $40 million contracts. You would think being an agent You'd never be dropping guys. But I guess, according to Mark Stein, a source said that the decision occurred after the point guard sent signals that he wasn't interested in whatever came from his agent's conversations with the Knicks. So Ben Simmons just literally doesn't care even enough to take a contract.

Bad sign.

So he's just not- He's not represented currently.

You got to be pretty bad for your agent to fire you.

Especially in the NBA. That's my point is an agent's commission, and you can get a bench player and get them $30 million, and that's probably a nice payday for you.

Yeah.

So if you're getting dropped, you must be bad, bad, or just not care.

Not at all. It's in conjunction probably with the Knicks, turned out the Knicks.

Yeah, it was like, Hey, the Knicks are interested in Ben Simmons. I don't care.

Yeah, be like, Nah. I mean, why not just retire? You see how much... Oh, man, I'm going to look it up. It's going to make you so mad. It's going to make us so He's mad.

Ben Simmons has made... 230.

230.

All right, wait. Hold on. I'm looking it up, Max. Max, give us a guess.

Might be more.

No. I'll say 265.

Ben Simmons has made $203 million. Still crazy.

Good for him. $203 million. As much as Kirk Cousins.

What has Kirk Cousins made?

I think he's up to like, 260.

We should just start doing this all the time. All right, hold on. I'm looking up Kirk Cousins. Kirk Cousins has made $411 million.

Wait, no. I don't think he's made that.

I think that- No, that's what he can make. 321 million dollars. I guess he'll get cut. 321 million dollars. He has on contract another 90 million, so that will be... They can get out of that. Yeah. All right. Good for him. Still, $321 million.

I guess the one way that he could earn all that money if he did get traded to a team became their starting quarterback and then played again next season. Yeah. That's what I'm hoping for. Just keep paying, Kirk.

All right. Good hot seat.

My cool throw is the Mountain.

Yeah.

Mountain from Game of Thrones set the world record for dead lifting. Lifted. What do you think it was?

One thousand pounds. Two hundred and 75 million... Oh.

What does a thousand pounds translate to in dollars?

Your guess is what?

$1,800, a. K. A. 1,000 pounds.

I'm going to say 1,300 pounds.

1,124 pounds.

That's not even that impressive. I would have been impressed at 1,300 pounds.

Steroids or not?

You got to assume.

I mean, you got to go steroids. You got to go steroids.

You got to assume.

Dude, this is such an insane... Imagine lifting that. That's a car, right?

Yeah.

By the way, Vanny Woodhead, number 2.

He did it so easy, too.

Vanny Woodhead, number 2, looks awesome. We're going to drive to Indy, and that's about it. But it's going to be sick when we do. It's going to be so sick when we do, boys.

I think if the mountain was born 1,500 years ago in Iceland, they would think that he was a God that just ruled their island.

He would have just been their number one. They would have gone to wars and just be like, Well, we got this guy.

One V one.

We're good. We got this guy. What a beast.

Also, the Ryder Cup is out this week.

Yeah. Ryder Cup.

Ryder Cup.

Ryder Cup. Our golf tournament.

Barcele Sports, Ryder Cup.

Excited to watch that.

Yes. The draft match one, match two, match three and four out this week.

Okay, nice. Love that.

It'll be some real rivalry matches in that somewhere.

Yeah. Pft.

My hot seat is US Men's National Team Soccer. Actually, no, I'm going to switch it. It's us. We are the problem.

I got a question with this.

We are the problem Because Coach Poquetino talked to the media and to the critics. We're playing against Japan tonight. He said, We're the problem with US soccer. Not him, not the players. He said, You are damaging your country and damaging your players. When We need to be positive. We need to be all together because the country deserves that we are all on one side trying to help arrive at the World Cup in the best condition and be competitive to do something that makes our fans proud. So it's on us.

In this quote, didn't he say something Are you talking about we qualified for the World Cup already?

We did.

By just hosting it. By existing. This national team in this country has qualified already for the World Cup. No, we didn't. So the important...

We didn't qualify for The important thing is to apply common sense.

We just hosted it. If people want to talk about bullshit, they can talk about bullshit, but we feel the responsibility to provide the whole group of players. We need to give the priority for how he feels.

That's like a kid having a party and then inviting all the cool kids and being like, I'm a cool kid. Here's where we're at. Everyone's at my party.

Here's where we're at in terms of US Men's National Team Cope, because I've been a part of many cycles of this.

Yeah, Hank nailed that. It is like I'm one of the popular kids. Oh, it's actually just that my parents let me party in the basement and everyone uses my Yes.

They did not qualify.

Yes, they did not qualify. Here's where we're at. We're at the stage where now we're saying maybe the coach is just messing with the lineups and he knows that they're going to suck, but he's trying to put players in different positions to see how they handle stress. It's not good. No. It's not good. Who did we lose to? Things are not good. We lost to a lot of countries. But who did we just lose to? We didn't lose him to every country.

Who did we just lose?

We don't win again. It's football season, so I didn't watch. But we're playing Japan Must win. Jaden Daniels, Japan? Must win. Jaden Daniels' son? Yeah.

We lost South Korea, 2-0. Dude, we...

Do you think that Jaden Daniels is going to play for Japan in flag football in the Olympics? Should.

That'd be fun. You'd have to get a jersey.

The Rising Sun of Washington? Yeah. You'd have to do it. I would.

Are you cool, Ron?

I haven't done... Oh, yeah, that was my I had two hot seats. Okay. Jerry O'Kunal on the hot seat. He made the news yesterday because he got his phone stolen, which I say to the thief, Good job. The guy used an Android. Bet you didn't expect that when you tried to rob Jerry O'Kunal. You're like, He's rich. He's married to Rebecca Romaine. What is this piece of shit that I had?

Where was it stolen from? I didn't see this.

Yoga. His yoga class. Hand card. So he went to yoga and he left his bag out front, and then he came out, realized that his phone was gone. Don't they have lockers at those things? Apparently not. I think he just left it in the front. It's not like it's a briefcase with fancy football information. He didn't have anything important in there. Yeah, an apple.

I'd love to see what type of bag it was.

What do you think it was?

Like a Lulu Lemon.

Or it was like an NPR tote bag.

Why does it just been a Whole Foods shopping bag, like a reusable one? He's like, I'll just reuse this all the time. Yeah, he left his bag out front. Somebody lifted his phone. We've been getting text from Jerry. We have no idea if it's actually Jerry or if it's the thief.

Did this actually make news?

I think he sent us a hot Instagram video. I think it's Jerry.

Probably or a horny thief.

He sent me a check that was just a check talking in German who just had huge tits on a tractor. Then he followed up. He was like, Do you see that German check? I was like, Yeah, I did. Yeah.

He said, The only real bummer is that I had a photo of Rebecca from high school in my wallet. So a four-leaf clover Jack McBrayer gave me and a $2 bill I got while shooting Standby Me.

All right, the Standby Me thing, that sucks. The Rebecca thing, that's under 18.

He's got a picture of a high schooler, high school girl in his wallet. Yeah.

Did we win week one?

We did win week one. All right, let's go, Jerry. It sounds like, because I think it was on Friday that his wallet got stolen. This might have been the thief that managed our fantasy team this weekend to a win. We can't even declare this to be a win by Jerry.

Do you think How do you get his stuff back?

I don't think he's got his phone back. Oh.

How is he texting us?

I don't know. That's what I'm asking. He went to the cops. By the way, man card again. You saw street justice, Jerry.

Let's just call it real quick because that would be very funny if just a random dude picked up. Yeah, there's a chance the person just saw the Android. Yeah, it was just like, I don't want to- Threw it in a trash can.

Whoops.

Didn't mean to steal this.

Hey, Big Cat.

Oh, you got your phone back? Yeah, I got it back. I got it back. All right, okay, cool. Hey, did you see- I did get a new Android, though.

I mean, I didn't like...

But I moved up two generations. Oh, nice. Hey, did you see- I had the six, but now I have the eight. Did you see that German check with the big tits on the tractor? Is that something you sent me? No, you sent it to me. She's Italian. Oh, shit. You're right. She's Italian. All right. We're on air, are we? Yeah, we're on air right now. Hey, come on, man. Come on. I didn't send any video.

I don't do that at all. Hey, Jerry.

And by the way, I think legally in the state of Illinois, you have to say, Hey, you're on the air. That's something you have to say.

I don't want this on, We're going to rock down to I'm going to go up.

I want to look at a bag of those. He gets copyrighted.

All right.

Now you need to do your cool throw.

I'll just go double hot seat on that. Double hot seat. I like that. The cool throw is going to be a plug. Pup Punk is playing in Bloomington next Friday at Killroy's. Love Bloomington, and we're doing a bunch of other shows. I think we're playing in Iowa City at El Rays on... That's October 24th, Baton Rouge, October 10th at Fred's again. Then we're playing in Chicago at Reggie's on November 11th and New York, December 18th at the Racket. It's going to be a good time.

I want to sing a song on the 11th.

Yeah. On the 21st at Reggie's? Yeah. Which song? I don't know.

Free Bird? No. I was thinking maybe Third Eye Blind.

Okay.

Don't look back in anger.

You know what we could do? This is actually be an appropriate song for today, Jumper. I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in.

And if you do not want to see Caleb again, I would understand. I would understand.

All right, my hot seat is Mike McDaniel because now it's open season. Rex Ryan called him McGenius.

Oh, no.

Yeah, called him. Said, McGenius guy or whatever the hell he is. Nerd boy. Their team has no respect for their coach. They play like that. They're soft. Every part of their football team, it's over.

Mcbranials. Yeah.

Nerd boy or whatever the hell he is.

I think Rex probably thinks anybody that wears glasses is a nerd, right?

100%. Classic, yeah. Anyone who knows how to turn on a computer? Yeah. Oh, little fucking dork over here. You press the power button.

See that over there? That's the man, genius.

Yeah, but that's a very bad sign for him.

Not good.

When it's open season like that, people feel comfortable calling him nerd boy, McGenius.

I know Rex has been waiting for years to rip into McDaniels. Oh, yeah.

Also, Hot Seat, Bryce Young, because that video of him watching the Jumbotron, the little commercial break races that they do on the Jumbotron during the game was not a good look. No. Bryce Young might be in trouble. He was watching the helmet race or the hide the ball in the helmet during a timeout instead of huddling up with his team.

Did you get it right?

You'd hope.

If you got it right, I'm okay with it. If you got it wrong, that'd be bad.

That's very embarrassing. Then my cool drone is also a plug. Stella Blue coffee, we are doing Golden Mug today and tomorrow. Winners are getting $500 gift card to game time. That's a pretty big gift. Go to a game, to a concert, and we also are bringing back butter cookie, so get excited. We got butter cookie. We got golden mug for two days. Buy everything at stellbluecauffy. Com, save some dogs, and get some butter cookie. We'll maybe think of some type of punishment I have to do during the packer's commander stream. I don't know what I can do, but maybe a cold tub or something or a shock collar. Maybe you could shock me. All right, Zack, finish this off. Got tasers. Oh, Jesus Christ. That's true.

No tasers.

But maybe- But maybe- You all have personalized axon tasers. But maybe tasers.

There's always a possibility of... Today's hot seat for me is... I know we're doing a lot of spit talk recently. Luis Suarez, previous spitter on the head of security. Three games of suspension. Out of three games, Inter Miami, Luis Juarez. So much spitting going on. First guy to see some real punishment.

He's also just not good anymore. He's old. He's old. He's just with Messi.

Messi's doing a lot of that, just bringing the boys over. I love that. Let's keep playing and not against crazy competition anymore. Let's just have some fun.

We'll get paid. They basically are getting paid to play intramural soccer in Miami.

Which is why it's so weird that Suarez is still spitting. Yeah.

He's like, Why do you care?

Imagine all the times that he spits when it's not on camera.

A lot. A lot. And your cool thrown?

My cool thrown. I may regret saying this. We did take a reserve take. I took a reserve take on week one after the Bucaneers-Falcons game. My cool thrown for today is the Tampa Bay Bucaneers because after watching Baker go over the top to Abuka, and Buck Ervin didn't get a ton of yards, but he was fighting for every yard that he got. I keep watching clips, and I keep having this thought in the back in my head, We could just make a run.

You're going to win the Super Bowl?

I don't know about Super Bowl. We could make a run, though.

Okay. Where does the run go to?

Or maybe do it. It could go to the Super Bowl. It could not, but it could also go there.

Yeah. So you might be going there.

Yeah, we might be going there. I am going to regret saying this, but I got to live my truth here, and I think we could do it.

That story that came out of the huddle, Mike Evans said that Buka basically was like, Hey, Baker, I'm going to run this route. I'm going to call a game. Hit me. And that happened.

Pretty cool. Also, credit to Chris Bermon for coining a mecca Pika Buka. Oh, Pika Buka. It's pretty good.

That is good. I like that confidence, Zack. Get a little swaggerer going.

I know it's week one, but let's just do it. What if we just do the thing?

Yeah, we got a little haves and have nots in this podcast. Split right here, right down the middle. It's the haves and the haves nots. Basically, will the Patriots, Jets, bears, combined wins be less than the best record of the haves of one team? Are you sure? Yeah. Yeah? Okay.

Patriots have a very easy schedule. Jets have an easier back-end schedule.

Okay. It's week one. Yeah, all right. It's week one. Listen, Memes, if we had scored 32 points, I'd be feeling a lot better. All right, let's get to our interview. We got Joe Buck in studio. Before we do that, P. F. T, you got a couple of ads.

Joe Buck is going to be brought to you by Shell, where members get more rewards, savings, and special offers with the Fuel Rewards program at Shell. Fuel Rewards members can earn rewards on fuel, snacks in the convenience store, dining out at participating restaurants, shopping online at participating merchants, and more. All rewards earned will turn into savings at the pump. The more you shop, the more you earn rewards, the more you save on fuel at Shell. Simple as that. The more you fuel, the more you save, and it's free to become a member. Get everyday savings afterwards at Shell. Members get more rewards, savings, and special offers. Join the fuel rewards program at Shell today. Visit feulrewards. Com/barstool25 for more information. At participating merchants and Shell locations, limit 20 gallons. Restrictions apply. Visit feulrewards. Com for more information. Buy your fuel at Shell. That's the only place I get gas. Joe Buck is also brought to you by our great friends at Chevy. Football season's here. Whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff, there's one ride that's always game ready, the Chevy Silverado. It's the longtime partner of my take, and our favorite truck.

It's all about grit. From job site to tailgate, Silverado lets you show up strong and tackle any task. Built for the hustle, ready for the game, Silverado is America's most dependable full-size truck. For JD Power 2025 award information, visit jdpower. Com/awards or head to chevy. Com to learn more and build your own Chevy Silverado. And now here's our dear, dear friend, Joe Buck.

Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very, very special guest, great friend of the show, recurring guest. It is Joe Buck in person. Joe, great to see you. We love having you here. First question, easy question. Want to go easy first?

Yeah. Okay. Let's ease into this.

Do you still hate SVP?

Yeah. I mean, detest him with everything I have. It's so funny how... And you're referencing something that was maybe two years or three years ago. Yeah, it was a long time ago.

It was a big moment. Yeah.

I think about it every day. I think about it every day. It's so dumb because people are like, Oh, they just got into it on TV. I'm like, Okay, let's say I did not like Scott Van Pelt. Do you think I would do that on national TV? I mean, that was a dumb question. Yeah. I think. Okay, I would not. That's too much. I would not.

Okay.

No, he was the one guy I knew at ESPN before I came there and felt like I could joke around with. But I don't know if you know this, but certain portions of the internet and social media don't really get jokes. They don't get irony. They don't get irony. They don't get subtlety. They don't get nuance. They don't get- Sarcasm. Sarcasm. No, he's my guy.

When that spat happened, when the dispute happened on live air, I actually took your side, Joe, because as we discussed on yesterday's part of my take, there's a lot of discourse around, Oh, you didn't play the game out there. Oh, yeah. Well, I'll ask you a question.

I read about that.

We think it's the other way around. You You've watched so much more sports than any athlete. You've watched it, and then you've had the takes about it. So it's like, They're on your turf now.

Yeah, I agree. And I think we should switch it with Akeman, and he should welcome us into the booth, and I should be the one led to with my opinions, and he should take us to break.

That would actually be a funny Freaky Friday thing for you guys to do one time.

It would be. Who would be Jamie Lee Curtis and who would be Lindsay Lohan?

Wait, Freaky Friday. I think you're probably Jamie Lee.

Yeah, I think so.

She's Cannons.

Yeah, she does. I don't know if you know that.

Yeah. She does. I'm way older than you guys.

Well aware. Did you watch the Cowboy Documentary?

I did.

Did you learn anything new about your broadcast partner? It was a great documentary.

I thought it was great. The one thing I learned that was different than I was expecting to see was that by the end of, what was it, '95, a lot of the players were banging the drum for Barry Switzer. That took me by surprise. But I think it is exactly what was portrayed in that documentary. It's like a running drama soap opera that just has gone on since the beginning of time. We just get onto the train and get off at different stops and get back on. I loved it. I was proud of him. I mean, I'm always proud of Troy, broadly, but watching him and the way he led and the way he played and his toughness, and that's all stuff that I've seen personally in our work relationship and to see it during his playing days because I obviously didn't know him then. I don't know. I get some weird pride out of that.

Yeah. It was a great, really well done documentary. I don't know if you came away with this take, but I was watching it, and the whole time I was like, Man, Pat Summerhays, that's when advertisers were men.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Yeah, that's my big boy.

I was like, boy, has this shit dropped off since then?

We don't get that anymore.

Yeah, you don't.

We don't really miss that.

No. Yeah. I think I've said on this show, I took the bait to turn this into semi-serious. I think that was a joke. To turn this into semi-serious was when Troy and Chris Collinsworth and I took over for Pat and John. Yeah. Even though I'm Jack Buck's son, and I started with the Cardinals when I was 21, I never really intentionally tried to sound like my dad. But when that happened in 2002, I think, and we were doing the main football game, it was intimidating to step onto that stage with those two guys having left and having been there and together for that long. Then the other piece of it was, I took the bait and tried to sound like Pat. Some Sometimes it was okay, and sometimes it came off to me flat and boring, and I listened back to it, and there are highlights that I'm like, Man, that's really good. Then there are highlights that I listened back and I'm like, God, I just sound like I'm not excited. I'm pissed at myself that I tried to sound like Pat, who, for people who aren't old enough, was a player, had this really big presence, gravely deep voice who would just go, Montana, Rice, Touchdown.

And then Madden would go off and do his stuff. He was the perfect guy and partner for John Madden because he was so over the top and bombastic. And that worked for Pat Summerhays. That did not work for me. And I feel like I'm a completely different announcement now than I was back then.

Okay, so to keep it semi-serious, do you think you're still getting better? Because I think you're In my Hall of Fame of Announcers, when I think big game, your name comes up. And I mean that genuinely, you have the big game voice. But do you think even three years ago, you're better than that? Are you still- I do, but I'm the worst person to ask, but I feel like I'm more comfortable doing my thing.

Maybe some of that is still remnants prior to that shift. I don't know when that shift happened. Maybe after I had vocal cord thing and I came back and I was like, Oh, I can make a loud sound again. So I'm going to make a loud sound, and I'm going to do it differently in baseball and football. I tried to do it in golf. That was bad, which you told me, both of you. Multiple Sometimes. But yeah, I do- It wasn't the voice that was the problem. Yeah. Fuck off. So yeah, I do think I'm getting better. I do. And maybe I'm wrong, but at least I feel that way.

I agree with you. I enjoy listening to your calls. You said that you listen to some of your old calls, like when you made the decision, Okay, I'm not sounding like me. I need to start sounding... Go back to who you are. Do you listen after every week to your calls?

It's a really good question because it is a good... Mark that one down. Got it. Yeah, good job. I know you've prepped a lot for this interview.

No, it's like we don't even need to have you answer the question. We just want to ask you questions and then you compliment us. We can move on. Okay.

No, it's Well, I do want to know, how often do you listen?

You know what's bad is if, and I tell young broadcasters this all the time, it's not fair to do a game and then turn right around and listen to it all. I do sometimes if it's on NFL Network and I'm like, Oh, I wonder how I sounded last night or how this call went. But it's not a realistic way to watch because I can still remember what I was thinking about in the moment, and I was frustrated that I didn't to whatever story, or you're making choices all the time. So if you give it a little bit of time and you forget about the game or the actual moments and the words, you can listen to it on a more realistic basis like you would at home, making fun of my gigantic forehead. It's a better representation of how you would sound to a person sitting on a couch, then you're just too hard on yourself. I'm too hard on myself to go back five minutes after and just dissect it That's just stupid.

Could you grade yourself on last season? How did that rank amongst the Joe Buck all-time seasons?

I think last year was good. I think our three years, hard to believe, we're in our fourth year now at ESPN. I think they've progressively gotten better. I think there's a lot of factors involved, but I think it took a minute for us to be like, Okay, we're not at Fox anymore. We're at ESPN. I think that was really good for us. I'm speaking for Troy here, but he and I have talked about it. I think change is good. I think it made... I've probably told you guys this before, but David Hill, who basically started Fox Sports, when I talked to him and that was all going on, and I said to him, What do you think about me potentially going to ESPN? I thought he would go, Are you crazy? You've been at Fox for 28 years. You're doing the World Series. You're doing that. You're doing the NFL games. You're doing whatever they want you to do. You've got a history there. He said, Go. It's going to be the best thing for you because it's going to give you new jitters. It's going to make you work with new people that might open your eyes up to something that you haven't done before.

It was great advice, and I'm glad I did it because I think, like what you said, I do think it's tweaked me a little bit to make me better than I was, let's say, six years ago, with a random number to pick. Yeah.

Just because we are the biggest Joe Buck fans, and you know we defend you everywhere. We defend you in private.

You probably defend me around this compound. Oh, yeah.

Just so we have the company line set, when you said the vocal cord thing, so we're going with that, not the hair plug addiction.

Well, I mean, one led to the other. Right.

But so we got to say when people were like, Hey, what happened? He had a vocal cord thing, not he had an addiction to hair plugs. He was addicted to hair plugs.

Yeah. And that was the takeaway when I wrote my book, this addiction. I'm like, Oh, my God.

I need hair plugs.

You went to rehab. I went to rehab. I need that pain. I need to know I'm alive. I need hair plugs.

Hit me. I need a hit. I need a hit.

Rip some hair out of the back of my head and put it in the front. I need it. It's that I had it a lot because I have a gigantic head and I have baby, fine, thin hair.

Beautiful hair.

Beautiful hair. It's beautiful. You'd find on a baby's bottom.

It's beautiful.

That said, it took me a lot to cover what I could cover with my head. I didn't know that at the time when I wrote my book, and that's really how it starts and ends, that I also color my hair, which I was like, though, that's the last line in my book. I know you guys both read it multiple times. It's not available anywhere, so I'm not plugging it.

Yeah, it's sold out.

It's sold out.

It's sold out everywhere.

I bought every copy. Yeah, it's just, if evaporated. I don't know. It's one of the others. It's either sold out or nobody bothers to print it any longer. But when that was all going on, I didn't realize that my name was like mud in the hair plug industry because they're like, You're given a It's a terrible name to people to get hair transplants because you're saying you lost your voice. It could have been any procedure. It was that I was intubated. If I got a new knee or somebody took my spleen out, I would have been facing potentially the same danger of the cuff in my throat hurting my nerve. That's what happened. I was just over-honest, if that's a phrase, and it isn't, by saying that's what I was doing when this all happened.

They knocked you out? You were out cold?

Well, the first, I think I got eight in St. Louis.

Oh, that's an addiction. Yeah.

You had eight different procedures?

Eight different ones. Yeah.

But you got to realize. You had a problem. Which one did you know you had a problem? Was it four or five?

Yeah, it was four. I was at the door the next day. I'm like, I know my hair, my head is chewed up and it's all blood, but I want more.

I need more.

Which is a doctor like, I think you've had enough. Yeah.

Then I had to find new doctors. I had to find other people. Doctorshop? Yeah. I doctor shopped. There should be a website for that. But yeah, I don't even know what the hell we're talking about. But whatever. That's what I was doing when my voice went out.

I love that you lost the hair plug community. There's a guy sitting watching Monday Night Football. He's like, Fuck this Joe Buck guy. He made it bad for hair plug guys.

Well, now we're good. But now we're good because I've had a different style procedure out in LA, where they do this machine and they take it out of the sides of your head. There's barely any pain. I did basically an infomercial with my head all chewed up. I put it on line.

Wait, so are you done? Can you say right now you're never going to get another- I can say with 100 100% certainty that I might do it again.

I'm done.

Joe, I had him done last year, and I can quit anytime you want. No, he did. The back of his head. Yeah, he got the strip in the back.

Well, then why are you giving me shit?

I'm just saying because as a member of the hair plug community, you gave us a disservice.

Now you're taking up the banner.

You're taking up the banner. I can recreationally go out and have a good time and get a hair plug transplant and then come back the next day, feel fine, and not have an urge to go back to the clinic like you. Yeah. No, I couldn't get enough. Now I tell people that, they look at me like I'm a crackhead. Right.

No, I'm sorry. From the bottom of my heart, I apologize to you and all of the hair transplant surgery getters that are in your audience.

I do want to know about the one in LA, though. If I need sprucing.

Yeah, I got a guy. Okay. I got a guy. He does in the back of a van while you're moving.

I'm never going to count myself out of having a second one, but I can stop whenever I want.

But did you get the kind where they... This is really not fascinating conversation, but did you get the kind where they did the strip out of the back Or did they do the non-strip procedure?

It was the FUE, whatever that one is.

Yeah, that's the new stuff. That's like gold.

Yeah, it's gold.

That gold energy. The old time was, shoot at the back of your head, take a strip of scalp and then pull them out and replace them. That sucked. So that was the question. So the first six times I did it, where I was under local anesthetic, the last two times I did it, the doctor's like, You can get knocked out for this. It seems like you really don't like the pain. I'm like, You think? I don't like who does like the pain? It sucks. And he goes, For an extra $3,000, we can knock you out. I'm like, How about $10,000? Done. Knock me out. I'm out. So that's when it happened.

So it was the intubation that was It was the intubation that was the problem.

It was the intubation. It had nothing to do with hair.

Okay.

Monday Night Football- Glad we cleared that. Yeah. I'd say this is for Monday Night Football.

We're never going to bring this up ever again.

Yeah, never.

Ever. Yeah, it's fine. All right.

You're here in Chicago. Obviously, Monday football. We're going to run this on Wednesday. We don't know what's going to happen. The schedule for Monday football, it's gotten better. You must be excited because there's just some really good games you have. I have a question, though. On week two, there's two Monday football games. Why don't you call both?

Yeah, we thought about that. It's just hard to call two games at the same time. I've done two games in- Young, hungry Joe Buck would do it. That's right. I take a trolley car to go do it. Cable car in San Francisco, which I did. I went from a football game to a baseball game. But yeah, at the same time, it's a little too much. Okay.

All right, that's fine. What is your favorite stadium set up to go to that maybe people don't think? Because obviously, there's money. Football has some big-time team stadiums. But is there one stadium you're like, I actually really like this place. People don't realize it's a great setup.

The stadiums are all so good now. The one in my hometown, St. When the Rams were there, it's like, Oh, we forgot a broadcast booth. So we were down in the seats. They took the four, whatever, four sections or two sections and turned it into a makeshift broadcast booth where you were running up the steps into the concourse to go to the bathroom during commercials. That stuff doesn't fly anymore in the NFL. So they're all good. If you give me a stadium and the bathroom is in the booth, I'm good. I'm at the 50.

What about sight lines? Is there one that's like you're too high up?

This one is really weird. Chicago. It's really low. For some things, it's really good because you can actually see I can see numbers coming at me, but it's so low, and therefore it's flat, like the far sideline in the front corners of the end zone and stuff. I have no idea. I don't know if the guy's in. I don't know if he's not. My eyes have to go from watching it live on the field to the monitor, or I have no chance. It's not high enough.

How hard is week one as an announcement when you've got guys that are new on the team that you haven't seen that jersey before? Is that like the danger zone?

A little bit. I think you get into We all watch so much football that by the time I do Jacksonville against the Chiefs later in the air, not that deep into the air, I will have watched enough Jacksonville to know the skill guys in who's catching passes. But yeah, it's a little bit different for this game, although this story tonight is about the two quarterbacks, and it doesn't really expand much. You want to talk It's not the interior of the offensive line. I mean, it's not that exciting. It's about JJ McCarthy, and it's about Caleb, and how much has Caleb progressed with Ben Johnson, and who is, and how good is JJ McCarthy? The only time I saw him in college, I'm not a huge college football guy, was in the national championship game, and I was blown away. And then Harbaugh came out and basically said, I'd love to coach this guy in the NFL. And we met him, I don't know, three days ago, four days ago, could not be a more impressive 22-year-old. And I say that having 29 and 26-year-olds myself, that you like him and you want to see him do well.

But that team loaded, and it comes down to one guy. They got the coach, they got the line, they got Justin Jefferson and Addison and a good defense. It comes down to one guy, and that, to me, is fascinating.

I have a favor to ask you, Joe. On behalf of my good friend Big Cat here, a Bear's fan, if the Vikings kicker... Who's the Vikings kicker, by the way?

Will Rykard.

Will Rykard. If he's perfect through three quarters, in the fourth quarter, if he goes out there and let's say it's one-score game. Can you say, And he has not missed tonight, right before he kicks.

You want an announcement's jink? Yes. Just say that. That is brilliant because it's one up the whole say, Yabo, say whatever. Play off Lenny. Ryan. The playoff Lenny. The playoff Lenny. Fuck you for that, too. No, play off Lenny was great.

Yeah, playoff Lenny was our favorite. You took offense, we loved it. Play off Lenny. That's his name. Yeah. The guy shows up in the playoff.

It was great, the playoff. But I'm not asking you to to fix the outcome.

Who was that? Fournette?

Yeah, Lenny Fournette. Because I think it was like this. He hadn't maybe been to one playoff game with the Jags.

Yeah, but he hadn't had that grade of regular season, I think. But it was time for playoff Lenny to show up.

Then playoff Lenny showed up.

Yeah, there he was. And it's great. There he was.

Just say, I'm not asking you to lie.

Well, that's the thing. I mean, can we all just grow up on that whole thing?

No, absolutely not.

You guys are.

Do you know who watches these games?

You control the game. I control it. So I'm doing a baseball game.

You can well adjust to the Justin Hilton are watching this, and they're like, Oh, that had nothing to do with him missing. No.

I'm doing a baseball game. Not anymore.

God doesn't like you doing baseball games. They ran that game out.

Clearly. That's true. Somebody tunes in the game. I'm not allowed to say, Hey, whoever, Clayton Kershaw is pitching a no hitter? That is the dumbest thing of all time. But you have to talk around it like Al Michael's talking around a bet. You have to go, And so far, Clayton Kershaw, well, there have been no hits.

Shut up. No, we're right on this. You jinks it.

It's stupid.

Guys who change numbers, because I feel like numbers are going to change.

Oh, my God. It's so bad.

It's so bad. So Luther Burden, tonight, do you know that he's changed his number three times before he played in Snap?

If there's one... I am not smart. But the one thing I can do is I can go back for The teams that I really followed, and I can broadly come up with numbers with random people. Yeah.

Do you want to hit the lotto machine? And whatever number comes up, tell us a guy that has this number. Okay. We're going to test you. Numbers 1 through 100. Also, if you want to pick a number, just if you want to randomly guess what number it's going to be, that's fine.

But here's my point. Well, that's subtle.

Yeah.

Thirty-five.

Thirty-five?

Yeah.

Well, for me, that would be The Matt Morris of your St. Louis Cardinal.

Okay. So question about numbers.

But it messes me up because I get used to seeing a number. I equate a lot of things with a player, the the way they run, the way a uniform fits, the number, and that gives me a clue as to who the hell that is running down the sideline with the ball. And when they change numbers, it It's like a short circuit in my mind.

Is it screwed up now? Because we hate that they have let everyone wear every number, like wide receiver is wearing numbers in the 20s and all that stuff. Does that actually make your job harder?

I thought it would, but it's some of these numbers are so unique now. Yeah. That, like Micah Parsons being number one for Green Bay, I'll be able to see him easier now because it's so weird to me that defensive outside linebacker is wearing number one, that I'll see it a lot better than I otherwise would if he's- Either it's a bunch of 90s. Is it 52? Is it 53? Or then you go to the Tampa Bay Bucks, who had jerseys that the numbers were slanted and thin. It's like, you're not giving me a chance. Or Detroit was, Is that an eight? Is that a six? I have to wait because you don't want to go crazy and just start saying, Touchdown, whoever it is. Jamieson Williams. Oh, no. That's Josh Reynolds. People would go after you for that. They go after you for everything. Yeah, they do.

What jerseys are the easiest to see? Stealers?

Stealers are pretty good. They're pretty defined. It's really just the... It's Tampa Bay that I come up with. It's hard to just differentiate eights and sixes.

They had the alarm clock ones for a little bit that were almost... They broke up the numbers.

Yeah, they were obviously a little digital. Yeah, it was really strange. Yeah. And braided was there then. I don't know what they are now. We've got them next week. They've gone from... They used to be the easiest when they were more red, when they were orange, and it was blended in a little bit. That was harder for me to see, too. And that stadium, the old that Bermon used to call the Sombrero, you were hanging off the clouds calling games there, and you're looking at tops of helmets running around, and it's scary when you end up doing the game off TV.

So when it comes time to leave the stadium, I know tonight at Soulja Field, not a very easy place to get out of after the game. Do you have a secret tunnel? I do, yes. You do? Yes. You're allowed to get that through?

I've spent the better part of the last two weeks digging it.

What's the longest you've ever had to wait after a game to get out?

Probably an hour.

Yeah. Not great.

It's not great. They're usually pretty good with helping get people out from the bowels of the stadium.

Get police escort?

Sometimes. Nice. Sometimes, not all the time.

I would abuse that so hard.

Do you go right home? They dump us at the highway. Yeah.

Do you go right home? Do you fly right home?

I'm not flying right home tonight. Okay. No.

I just realized there's a lot of double headers in the Monday Night Football schedule this year.

Yeah, Derek's here. Was it five? What's going on with that?

Four.

There's four.

Who's doing the other games?

Chris Fowler.

Okay.

Herb Street?

No. Or Orlowski? Orlowski. Louis Riddick. Okay. Are the guys calling the game?

When there's a double header, do you get upset if the other game is really awesome?

No. I would. No. Why?

Because I'd be like, What the fuck?

I should be in my game. I am. Espn. Okay.

Yeah.

You go, ESPN.

Joe's winking at us right now.

No, I really do believe that that whole rising tide lifts all ships. I hope that all of our games are great, and I root for those guys. I don't feel any competition with that.

Yeah. Do you guys, before a game, have a plan if the game is a blowout? Do you like, Hey, this is what we're going to hit?

No. I mean, Troy, if you saw his spotting boards, you'd be blown away by the amount of writing that's on it. Same with me. His is just neater. Mine is just messy.

You write Eat it yourself?

Oh, yeah. I have to do all that stuff myself. I have to plug all the names, numbers, height, weight, colleges, years in the NFL, how they were drafted, how they were acquired. I have to do all that myself. Some people farm it out, but the only way I'm going to learn it is if I actually do it. If I mess it up, get the US Open champion's girlfriend's name wrong, I want it to be my mistake. I don't want it to be, Hey, I just gave some kid 300 bucks to do all my homework for me. No. That's where you go, Oh, okay. I can get into this. I can get into that. I can get into this. My hope is that I've done all of that crap for nothing. It's all old. It's all history. There's nothing new that's on my board. The only new thing that I'm going to see is when they kick off at 7: 15 tonight here in Chicago. If you can keep your eyes on the game and not in your notes because the game is so bad. We did that Super Bowl that was Denver, Seattle.

Oh, man.

And you're like, Oh, my God. There's 100 million people on the other end of this thing that I'm talking into right now, and this game is awful. Then we're talking. First snap went over the head of Peyton Manning. Troy and I were talking in halftime. I don't even know who was doing the halftime show. We're like, Oh, my God. And then Troy goes, Okay, but it's Peyton Manning. If there's anybody that's going to bring him back, it's Peyton Manning. And then they kick off to start the second half, and Percy Harvin runs it for a countdown. We're throwing our pens. And that's when, if I go back and I listen to the game, the broadcast, I must have said how much time was left in the third quarter, 15 times. And with that, there's 7: 12 left in quarter number three. It cannot end fast enough. Yeah.

I think and I both had the Broncos in that game. Yeah.

So my wife- That was good.

I liked that.

Yeah, that was good.

Was a Bronco's cheerleader.

At. Second down. That'd be awesome.

Hand off. So my wife bleeds Bronco, whatever they are, orange and blue.

Orange, yeah.

And We did our production meetings with Denver first and then Seattle. So on, let's say, Wednesday, we met with Denver. And it was great. We were on their team bus in the back of the bus talking to Peyton Manning, and then somebody else would come back there, and it was great. Then the next day, we go, I think the Giants facility is where Seattle was, and we met with the Legion of Boom, all as one group. I mean, Earl Thomas and Cam Chancellor. When I walked out of that production meeting, and it was like, Denver's got no chance. They looked like they were ready to run through a wall on Thursday. I went back to the hotel, and Michelle was How was it? I said, I don't think you're going to like this game. Her brother flew in, and she had family. That was the game in New York, and it was just... That was one that I could see coming.

Do you ever have any intrusive thoughts when you're in the booth? Good question. What if I just said, Fuck?

No, but I will now.

All right, good.

If there was a... You know the Nickelodian Kids broadcast? If there was an adult... If they didn't have any rules on what you could say.

I would have the greatest night of my life.

They should do that. I would like to hear- Yeah, but then it doesn't happen.

I'm done. If I say what really goes through my mind, it'd be a great last night on TV. When I'm done, I will announce it here. I will then go into the booth, lock it, and I will have the greatest night of my life.

Wait, how many years you got left? Have you thought about it? I hope you never retire. No, I mean that. There'd be a huge hole in the football. Announcing is hard, and at your level is very hard, and we'd lose a big game voice, and that would suck.

Well, thank you, if you mean it. I do. But thank you.

No, I'm just kidding. I mean it.

No, you're not.

That was a big thing when I was young. Yeah, I don't know. 10 years, 12 years, 15 years. I don't know. But We're not close. We're not close. I'm not going to do the- Dan Patrick comment. Man makes plans and God laughs. I have no idea. I could get hit by a bus getting out of here, even though a driver- Yeah, your driver.

You're basically the President of the United States because your driver- They did a dry run. They did a dry run at 8: 30 in the morning, came to the office, and made sure that everything was...

I think they swept it from the arms. There must be a good breakfast place near here.

There actually is.

Yes, right on the corner. Oh, well, there you got to. That's exactly what it is. Just watch, check out the parking Although it is a dangerous parking lot for drivers. Some people have hit the pole there.

It's a little tight. Yeah, it is. You got a lot of room here. I counted at least 4,000 employees here. Every one of them looks the same.

And they're not doing anything.

They're not doing anything. They're just walking around like, huh?

You would think that Joe Buck walks in and maybe try to look a little busy, but we got guys who probably- It should be like the Von Trapp family at the end.

Like, hello, hello, sir. They're like- It's the opposite.

Hey, what's up? They're like, Oh.

Hey, you want some ice cream?

We got the scream, go ahead.

You want some ice cream?

We bet on this baseball game. You want to sit down? Yeah.

I actually prefer that. I see why you guys like this so much. I'm glad that your ego has dragged everybody to Chicago.

Listen, you get a full basketball court, golf simulator, ice cream machine.

That's what you're still selling them on that? Oh, yeah. I mean, hey, it's- Hey, you get an ice cream? Yeah, but I'm uprooting my family. No.

But you get an ice cream. The big sell is the not working part.

The We got a bunch of Kawhi letters around here.

No show jobs.

I've got seven-year-old twins. I'm aiming them right for your front door.

I can't wait till you're... Oh, man. If we're still doing this in 12, 13 years, and I get a text from Joe Buck being like, Hey, my son really wants to intern over the summer. Oh, man, that would be great.

That would be great. Do any of your kids have good voices?

Well, my oldest daughter sings. She's got a really nice voice. The two young ones, that's be odd to- Do high Pitched? Yeah. I mean, I give them until they're 13. Maybe when things happen, they'll... When I started when I was 19, filling in with the Cardinals, I was 19, which back then somehow widely felt normal. And now that I've had kids, I'm like, What was going on? Why was I doing games then? Or 21? And I sound like this. Here's a ground ball to short. Ozie, he picks it up, two is right, throws to first, two out. And I was doing a game. My dad let me sit down. Daddy let me sit down for an extra inning game. And Ray Lankford bowled over Darren Dalton for a win at home over the Phillies. And my voice, I sounded like Peter braided. It was the most embarrassing. It was like the curtain came down. The whole time, I was trying to sound like I was 30, and I was 21, and my voice just broke, and I sounded like I was two.

It was awful. Did you have a different voice for baseball as opposed to one for football?

No. I think the main thing is it's a different rhythm. So maybe by the end of the game, We, like tonight, we did a preseason game, the Commander's preseason game. And both Troy and I were walking up to the booth like, I don't know that I remember how to do this. It's been so long since I've done anything. When they kick it off, is it still going to work? What do I say? And it takes a little bit of time to get into that rhythm of calling football. And that's why it's good. And people are like, Well, you moved on from Fox. But I know when he's going to jump in. He knows when I'm done. I know when he's going to go. And getting into that rhythm is just that's what makes it good. Yeah.

Have you thought about going back to DC? Because I know that it's going be the Commanders and the Bears, the part of my take bowl. And I told Joe before he sat down that we were going to get a tattoo based on the outcome of this game, whoever wins or whoever loses has to get that tattoo. Have you thought about running it back with Josh Harris and doing the handshake?

Oh, he's come into the booth the last... That happened, I think, three seasons ago. He's come in the last two preseasons, and we make a stupid elongated handshake as a joke. Oh, I like that. Good. Yeah, and he's great. And last year, his social media team or somebody was following him around. And so I did it. We reenacted it. It was so weird, and I felt so bad because when I look at the replay of it, nobody has any idea, by the way, what we're talking about, but we're doing a preseason game.

No, we know.

Our audience. I'm talking with my hands, and he's nervous as the new owner of the commanders. And I have my hand leg over in front of him, and he just automatically shook it.

You baited him.

I baited him. I'm saying it was my fault. It was not his fault. I was stupidly talking like, I don't know.

When you're watching a game, can you turn off your announcement's brain? Or are you thinking like, Oh, I would have said this differently? Not that anyone's doing their job poorly, but are you thinking that while you're watching? When I'm watching porn, I'm like, Oh, I would have already come.

What a comparison.

Well, you're just watching something. You're just in your head or in true inner dialog.

Yeah, I'm going to think about that next time I'm watching Mike Tariko on a Sunday night. I have a tough time turning that off. Yeah. And then I am listening to the worst thing is when you find a verbal crutch that I don't know if you guys go by. I'm guessing you guys do so much content here. You don't go back and listen to anything.

No, but I have verbal crutch that I try to- But I go back, and when I do watch stuff, that's what I'm watching for.

If I go, The pass is caught at the 15. I am so mad of myself because I listen and I'll go through different seasons, and I'm like, My God, the whole year. I'm like, The pass is caught. And I'm trying like hell to break that habit. And when I hear other announcers with verbal crutches that they can't stop using, it drives me up a wall.

So in this case, it's you holding out the word until you find out what happened.

It's me stalling or coming up with the guy's name, or in the case of Tampa Bay or Detroit, figuring out who that is. It's easier when you've got Mike Evans, who's 9 feet tall, and he wears number 13 in the front corner of the end zone in a jump ball, I can say, Evans in the end zone. I don't have to wait because I know that's Mike Evans. Yeah, that's exactly what we were talking about before.

For what it's worth, I thought that when you narrated our Dinger's Only Baseball Challenge, you did a great job. You did a great job. Do you remember that?

I remember doing it.

Do you have any idea what it was? Or did you just read the words?

I read the words No, I think you provided me with video.

Yeah, you're going to have to do it again.

Oh, am I?

We also need you to write a chapter in our book.

Oh, yeah, we should talk about that.

The last forward I wrote was for Ardie Lange.

No, I think you got confused. That should scare you. I think you got confused there. We didn't ask for a forward. We need a full chapter.

Oh, a full chapter. Yes.

Okay. No, we're not asking for a couple of meters.

Is this the pardon my take?

Yeah, we're about to do the 10-year anniversary. And you are a very big part of this show.

I find that that is funny. And I get comments. I know I say this every time I'm on. Somebody said it to me the other day. I said, I'm going to be on, well, I said Wednesday because I'll play the game. We're doing it on a Monday. We're airing it on a Wednesday. But somebody said that to me on Friday. I don't know where the hell I was. And just random people will come up and, I love you on part of my take. I love it. And so, yeah, little did I know. I thought I was fired the first time I came on here. Because you were giving me shit, and I was saying stuff back, and I hung up the phone or got off the Zoom call or whatever it was before Zoom. And I said to Jonathan Butnack, I'm like, I think I just lost my job.

When we actually look at it, you coming on our show and then coming back on our show, which I think that's the other part of it, where it's like they- He didn't go home until crying. Yeah, they busted balls, and then they became friends. It wasn't like a one-time because you were promoting your book. That was a big moment for us. I think it was a big breakthrough. We owe you a lot. How we're going to repay you is have you write a chapter in our book.

What a gift. Thank you so much. Homework. Yeah, good. I have so much free time.

We We did collab on a chapter about hair plugs.

Let's do it. I did the front, you did the back. I like that.

One regular hair. It's perfect. But yeah, no, we do appreciate you. We say it every time, but it's crazy to look at it and do this because we've been working, working, working, and you get to 10 years, and then we look back and we're like, damn, we've done some pretty cool stuff.

You have. Now, are you in bed with Fox, too?

Yes, very much. Me and Cletus, we share a twin size.

You've been out Are they still in those studios? Do they still have Cletus in the front lobby there?

I don't know. I do Thursday mornings. Big Cat does Tuesday mornings on Fest1. Week Up parcel. I asked if Kledas could come to the studio. They sent me a collectible figurine. I think it's back there somewhere. Oh, yeah. There's Kledas. There's Kledas. Then they said that they're going to work on getting Cletus out for an episode.

I never got one of those.

We got to have Cletus do the car wash here where he goes on every show.

That thing is scary. Yeah? He used to come to the seminars we had and would walk around. I I don't know if there's somebody in there or if it was remote-controlled, but it looked like it could rip your throat out.

How big is it?

It's like nine feet tall. You were scared of the robot? I was scared of the robot, yes. Yes, I was. Let's see.

Oh, there's Cletus. Look at... Yeah, Cletus is awesome. That's our coworker right there.

Yeah, it's disconcerting to be next to something that mechanical.

Yeah, but no, we've loved it so far. You're a colleague now. How does that make you feel? Probably pretty I'm not there anymore. If you're a teammate. If it was baseball- It was baseball.

You're not at Fox anymore? No. Did you guys get that?

No, we didn't know that.

You're not even allowed to do baseball on Fox?

No, I'm not allowed to do anything on Fox. I had Fox taken off my television in St. Louis.

Well, you're doing this show, and we're going to reair it on Fox. Oh, no. You better not.

You better not. Derek Volner will come after you.

We're going to use all the words you've said in this. That will be actually the game of the week next Sunday. It's you calling that game.

Just pasting words together?

Oh, yeah. When we do the Dinger's Only, we'll put the little Fox Sports logo.

You better.

If you do it, we're done. That's the only thing that can get me to not ever come back to this little frat house.

What's the one... We'll wrap up in a second because you got to go call the game. No big fancy job. What's the one game that you wish you could have called?

Buffalo, Baltimore last night. That was pretty sick. God, I don't know. Maybe the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team. Yeah, that's out there. Al did pretty well with that.

He did do pretty well.

The Hale Mary last year.

Yeah, it was pretty good.

It was just crazy. I think it's any one of those that's just... My favorite is the Minneapolis miracle in the end of my time. This is my 32nd year doing NFL. And if there's one that stands above the others. It's the Diggs' TD along the sideline because that was one where I've got my mind made up that he's going to catch it. If he catches it and hop out of bounds to try a game-winning field goal, he turns around. It was brilliant awareness because I think every receiver is taught to catch it and get out of bounds to give your kicker a chance. And he turned around, nobody's there, and he took it in for the countdown, and that place was going to come down. It was amazing. Yeah.

When you don't have the Super Bowl, do you miss having the Super Bowl?

No.

Or are you like, This is awesome. I get to watch.

Well, when we were doing it on a regular basis, we're doing it every three years. And it felt like every three years was about the right pace to that because it is big. I can't wait to do it next year. We're doing it next year at ABC, ESPN.

Where is that Super Bowl?

La.

Okay.

Which it's going to be the biggest day in ESPN history, I think, with what's on the line and to get back into that rotation for Troy and me, it's just there's no day like it. And in broadcasting, to talk into a microphone and know that there's that many people on the other end, 94 % of which are not listening to one word you're saying. They want to watch the commercials and see if their bet worked. But it's really cool.

Does time crawl for you on Super Bowl Sunday when you're calling it?

Yeah, I think that's the small thing about being out in LA and being on Pacific time because it comes up a little quicker. You're kicking off at what would it be, 3: 25 instead of 5: 25 or 6: 25. So yeah, it's a little easier to get to game time, which is awesome.

Who's your prediction for Super Bowl 2027 in LA. You have the script, right?

Yeah, I have the script. It'll be Detroit against Buffalo.

Okay.

Detroit against Buffalo. That would be a great Super Bowl. Rematch?

From this year? Yeah. No.

Okay.

Damn.

Who's in it this year?

I can't say. Come on. It's not our Super Bowl.

That's true. You'll have to- But you don't want anyone to... You don't want to do promo for the Super Bowl. Right.

People might accidentally end up watching.

Right.

Yeah. Then they would know about it.

You can spoil it. Then few people will watch.

Yeah, that's true. But I think I'm going to air on the side of not telling people that there's going to be a Super Bowl this year. All right. Just so they don't happen to just flip the channel and, Oh, my God, the Super Bowl is on. You know what?

We might team up with you in solidarity with Joe Buck. We're not going to announce the Super Bowl.

Are your commanders good enough to go?

I'll tell you after Thursday night.

We had a debate about this.

Because I don't think that they are. I don't think they're a good enough team. But if they beat the packers, that will be enough to convince me that they are good enough.

Yeah, I agree with that.

Thank you. Thank you, Joe. These guys tried to gaslight me.

Who wouldn't? No, I was just thinking that was a thing. Who would argue that? I said that they went to the NFC Championship game last year. Going into the season, they got better. You should be thinking Super Bowl if you're a Commander's fan. That's not an unrealistic thought to have.

Yeah. You can just say that. If there's one thing that you think would hold them back.

Defense.

I thought they should have been in on the Parsons thing.

That would have been great, but I don't think Jerry was going to trade him in the division because the- Or Hendriksen. Yeah, Hendriksen would have been nice. The Eagles tried to get Parsons, too. They gave him the biggest offer. Then Jerry stiff-armed him and said, No, we don't want to trade him to the NFCE. I don't think it was ever realistic. Then with the Cap stuff, I don't know how any of the Cap stuff works, but I think that was too rich for us. I don't think we could afford it.

Hendriksen would have been a nice add.

Hendriksen would have been a great add if we could have gotten him. But the defense is a little bit old, and I'm not sold that they're going to be a top 10 defense. If they're top 15, top 10, then yes, I could see us getting to the Super Bowl this year. But next year, you're wrong about the lines.

All right, I got one last question It's always great having you here, Joe. Yes. Roback question, robackkwestion, robackk. Com, promo code take 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, roback. Com, promo code take. I don't think I told this story on PMT, But I want to hear your side of it. We were in Tahoe for the golf tournament. You played well.

Proud of you. Dead middle. Yeah.

Proud of you. I was out to dinner with my wife on that Friday night, and you were sitting a couple tables away. You hadn't noticed that I was sitting behind you.

I didn't, yeah.

Until the waitress brought-Server. Server, sorry. No, I think it was a check. The server brought six enormous cookies and chocolate dipping sauce and brought it to you and your wife, and you were like, We didn't order that. And then you turned around and I was just sitting there sheepishly like, Yeah, that was my order. Because you didn't notice me until that moment. You're like, He's the cookie guy. That sucked for me.

I'm sorry. That was just pure happenstance. It was crazy. I'm really figuring out that there's this crazy sweet tooth you have.

I love cookies.

I mean, the coffee's great.

Thank you.

Appreciate it. This is going to get me through at least the first half- There we go. Tonight. Yeah, you and I said at least twice, Hey, let's get a drink. Guess what two people didn't get a drink together is you and me.

Well, we got cookies.

We got cookies. We shared a cookie.

And I ate all of them.

Yes. That was impressive.

You turned around, you were just like, This fucking guy can't stop eating.

Oh, that's not true at all. It was good seeing you.

It was great seeing you. Yeah, it's always fun running into you. Yeah, maybe throw in a little Stella Blue coffee plug. I don't know.

Yeah, during the game. Yeah. Also, you're going to- That's called Paola. I don't think I can do that.

Well, okay, you know what? You don't have to do that, but you do have to do the audiobook for our book.

I like that. Good trade.

Yeah. Okay.

All right. It's a great trade. We didn't win.

We don't even need you to do the whole…

My chapter?

Do the first page, and then we'll use AI Joe Buck, and then fill in the rest with that.

Yeah. Okay. We got it. Yeah. I did the audio version of my book, and they're like, Okay, we have secured the studio four days, three hours a day. I said, Oh, no. I am going to start reading it, and when I'm done, I'm done. And I read it straight through. That's awesome. And by the end, I'm just mailing it in. My voice was done. The end of it's got to be so bad.

And that's got to be tortured.

I have to read your whole book. It's like doing the video games. I've done those before, where it's like, Round ball to short, bouncer to short, bouncer to short, round ball to short. Can we fucking move on, please? Can we get that one more time? Bounce it as short. I'm like, I've got to do every team, every player, every... You got to do it at the end of a sentence. You got to do it at the beginning. You got to be excited. You got to be... There is no work worse than that in this business.

Yeah, I never even thought of that, how much it must suck to do that.

Then they're like, Hey, we got new names, because I did the Xbox, the first version of baseball. We got new names. They send you a thing of, I don't know, 250 names. You got to do up, down, up. I'm I'm so glad other people do that.

It was just a cash grab for you, Joe. Totally.

Oh, my God. Yes.

Good.

Thank you, Joe. Yes. You're the best, Joe. We love you.

Let's save your voice. Have a great day. Have a great. Have a great.

Do you have to monitor how much you talk before a game?

No, this is actually good for me.

We're warming you up.

We're fluffing you.

You're fluffing me. Yeah.

Getting you like semi. Yeah. In the voice gap.

Why does it always have to go there? You brought it up. You did. I did not bring it up. I said, This is good. And you guys went off. We know what you meant by good. You guys continued.

You wicked at us.

Is it It's real good?

You keep winking at us.

It's real good.

I'm picking up what you're giving us. It's real good. All right, Joe. Thanks. All right. Bye.

Thanks, man. Joe Buck was brought to you by our great friends over at Uber Eats. This episode is brought to you by Uber Eats, reminding fans that if football, coincidentally, makes If you're hungry, you can get game day deals on wings, burger, beer, chips, and more all season long, all on Uber Eats on Saturday. I'm planning on my Saturday. I'm going to go wings first. I'm going to start with a light order of wings. I'm going to go with wings at around 11: 00. Then I'm going to go with a burger. Then for my late dinner, I'm going to have some soup. I'm going to pop up some ramen on Saturday night. You love being able to get all your personal favorite game day meals delivered on Uber Eats, so you never have to miss a play. Uber Eats has deals on your favorite game day restaurants and groceries all season long. When football makes you hungry, get game day deals all season long, only on Uber Eats.

All right, let's wrap up. We got guys on Chicks. Henry.

Yeah, yeah.

Hit Hit it, Henry.

Hey, guys. Love the show. There's a bit of a problem in my friend group, where none of us like one of the guys that's dating one of the original girls in our group. Original girl. O. G. As if that makes a difference. It does. She brought him around and he started hanging out with us about one year ago, and he's about three years older than us. Whoa. He's honestly an asshole, and he talks shit about us or our other friends when they aren't around. Like I said, none of us really like him, but we all feel like we can't really do much about it besides he's dating our friend. Not really sure what to do, if anything. It sounds like something that's never happened before.

One of you guys has to sleep with him.

Suck his dick.

That would break it off. You got to suck his dick. Yeah, break it up real quick.

Just start sucking it.

Take one for the team. No. I mean, you can't. Someone has to step up. You have one friend in the group that is like, she's the girl that's always like, My problem is I have no filter. You need the no filter girl to prove it right now.

And you just get really drunk.

Yeah, the no filter This girl in that group, you are to blame for this, and you can no longer claim to be the one that's no filter unless you take the step up and tell this girl.

I disagree. I think you just got to do nothing because there's nothing you can do. That's just life. You got to realize if someone's got a partner you don't like, it's guess what? They like the partner more than they like you. You could be friends forever. Bffs. It don't matter at all. Or suck his dick. If you just do that, I actually If you think that that would probably cause a rift. You'll have to do a little damage control, but the guy will probably be gone, right? Mm-hmm. Although it'd be awkward if they stuck it out and you stuck his dick. That'd be a problem. Okay.

Hey, PMT crew. How do I explain to my partner that even though my team is not playing, I want to watch the Sunday and Monday night games?

What does that mean?

I want to watch football.

Yeah, football's on.

You just say football? Football.

That's a crazy question. Is this Jerry O'Neill? You're not allowed to watch.

It might be Max.

Max, did you watch Monday Night Football?

Full thing. Why? Why? Well, me and James almost had the biggest banger parlay of all time. We had Kyla Williams, two plus rushing, touch downs.

Are you a Monday Night Football guy now?

I might be. In that last play, he got it to the half-yard line.

I don't understand this Dude.

Yeah, I don't get it. Football.

Let's say their partner doesn't really follow football and you're a big fan of a team that played Sunday, and they're like, All right, understandable. That's your team.

But we're all fans of football more than anything else.

All of us are, yeah. Yeah.

All of us. We all watch football.

You just got to be like, Football? No, just say you're scouting for your team. You have to watch the other teams to make sure you know what's coming for when your team plays.

You also want to know if your team is good because you can draw some conclusions like, Oh, this team won on Monday Night Football, but that team looked bad. And by the transit of property, that means my team might be better. You have to do all these. Again, what's the issue here?

Yeah, I don't understand the issue either. It's football.

The partner doesn't get it. How do you make them get it?

Tell them. Football.

Football is on. Football is on TV.

I want I watch football. Just write that out like a caveman on a rock. Me watch football. Okay.

I'm a big Giants fan, and my wife is an Eagles fan. We have a two-month-old son. We moved to South Jersey two years ago, and I told my wife that I've always wanted a son to watch the Giants with. I also told her it would literally ruin my life if he becomes an Eagles fan. My friends from down in Philly territory jokingly bought him an Eagles onesie jersey. She put it on during the family vacation before the Eagles Cowboys game on Thursday, and I freaked out in front of her family. Kind of made an ask myself, but she 100% knew that I would. Now she's saying that I cannot dress him in any of the Giants gear that I bought him if she can't dress him in the Eagle shit. How do I make sure he grows up a Giants fan?

I love that he flicked out on a two-month-old. This has got to be... What is it? Not King Midas. Is it King Midas? Solomon. Solomon. You got to tell your wife, Let's agree, we'll make him a Cowboys fan. Then if she's like, No problem, then she deserves it. Yeah, you got to do that.

Was it King Solomon?

Then you both just hit your key. But then you both just hit your key. Cut the baby in half. But that's also funny.

That's what King Solomon did?

He was told, Cut your kid in half, and then he was about to, and they were like, Just kidding.

Yeah.

I've tested you and you passed the test.

Yeah. If the other person... The test is like, Hey, you got to cut the baby in half, and then one of them says, You know what? I care about the baby so much. You can have the baby. I will not see it get cut in half. You got to see who has that in them where they're like, You know what? I want the baby. I don't want the baby to grow up a cowboy fan. I would never wish that on anyone. That person is the rightful heir of the baby.

It's like when we put tennis on TV on Sunday just to see if Hank's going to watch it. Correct. When he does watch it, we make fun of him. But if he didn't watch it, we'd Okay, Hank, you can truly watch tennis because I know you're a football fan.

Also, just have more kids.

Split it up. Get the rivalries going. That's like what Jerry's doing. He's raising one son. I think his son is a Republican and his daughter is a Democrat. Yes. Just get some debates going on the house.

This is a weird one. Last one. Uh-oh. High Daddy's X5, 10 exclamation points. I didn't realize football season started and then ran in an issue I had forgotten about since last season. Where am I supposed to sit on a football Sunday? My boyfriend sits on the chasse?

Chase? Chase?

The chase?

The chasse, part of our three-is this why it was a wild one because it had that word in it?

No.

That's a tough word. That's a tough word.

I would have said-She's Lounge.

Okay.

It just looks like a word that's supposed to be said weirdly. Okay.

Right.

On the chase, part of our three-person couch, and no matter where I sit, it's uncomfortable. He sets up a full camp set up over there with three venti coffees and snacks. I've tried to sit next to him to also enjoy the snacks, to which he says, There's a whole couch. When I sit on the other side, I might as well not be there, so I end up leaving the room to do anything else. But then a whole day happens and I don't see my guy. Help.

Sounds like you actually answered your question. Where should I sit? The coffee shop, the bed.

It sounds like there's a whole couch.

Yeah, there's a whole couch.

Yeah, again.

Anywhere I'm confused.

There's a whole couch. The chasse is connected to the rest of the couch, right? Yeah. What is a chasse? It's like the part of the couch that sticks out. Yeah, the peak. So you can put your feet up. Oh, yeah. Yeah. What do you call it?

Just a couch. Seccional. It's a sectional part.

It's a whole couch.

The L.

Yeah.

That is the primo spot. Let's just all agree. That is the number one spot. Agreed. Yeah, listen, unless you're taller than your boyfriend, I don't think you don't get that spot.

Comfortability. It's a leg issue?

Yeah, I think it's like, Hey, look, you should be comfortable on the couch. I think she just is a little needy and wants to touch him, which is too much.

Yeah, he's got his whole set up over there.

Get a dog.

There's a whole couch. Yeah.

No, seriously, get a dog and just be like, Go take the dog out. You're good. You want a companion? Get a dog. Boyfriend doesn't exist on football weekends.

Or just sit on the couch. There's an entire couch.

An entire couch you could be sitting on right now.

Yeah, but just get it. I'm taking the guy side. Suck a dick, get a dog. Those are the answers.

I'm taking the guy side in this one.

Yeah, big time. Did anyone steal my jerky? It's in this back fridge. Okay, were you going to tell me? Yeah, I should have told you. I was looking for it and I was like, Where the fuck is my jerky? I started getting angry.

How's the weight loss going, guys?

Down 11. 5 as a team. Holy shit. Max, did you try the jerky?

I did. It tastes like- It's incredible. It tastes like steak.

It's the best jerky ever.

It tastes like medium rare jerky, which is... Yeah.

Shout out my guys at Polina Meat Market. Numbers three.

During the Joe Buck interview, you guys say numbers maybe a thousand times. Meme said three every single time back here.

Hank, you can have three.

You sure? Yeah. You want 22? Sure.

I'll I like that. I'll take 33.

I'll take six.

You said 99? I was about to give it to you, and then you started name calling. What do you have, Memes?

What name did he call you?

He called me a piece of shit. No, now we're keeping it. You're a piece of shit. Well, now I'm keeping it. I'll be a piece of shit. You're keeping 99? I was going to give it to him. We don't do name calling. Yeah, we do. We don't do name calling.

91, Okay.

26.

19. 76.

But if it hits the 62. 62.

Love you guys.

Folks, it's the 4 play guys. Let's talk truly unruly. When you spend every day following the countless laws of golf like us, it's refreshing to get a little unruly, whether that means using the old hand wedge to escape the bunker or just cracking open a hard seltzer that breaks all the rules. Few things feel better. Truly Unruly is the first high elk seltzer that actually tastes good. It's hard-hitting but still light and refreshing, making it perfect for everything from the front nine to the clubhouse. Find it near you at trulyhardselter. Com/locations. That's trulyhardseltzer. Com/locations. Hard Seltzer Beverage Company, Boston, Massachusetts. Please drink responsibly.