Transcript of Cooper, Earle and The Rural Juror: Tuesday, April 14th, 2026 New

Good morning, girlies.

It's The Toast.

It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts.

It's your favorite show, the fast 5 things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly. It's The Toast.

I sound amazing.

Welcome back to The Toast, and happy Tuesday. That's right, it's Tuesday. Tuesday, and I'm sitting down 5-foot located in South Florida. It's Jacqueline Follett!

And the crowd goes wild.

97 pounds, 5 feet tall, Jacqueline Follett!

Soon to be 95 because major update in my life, today is actually the first day so far that I I'm not breastfeeding. Like usually I start every day breastfeeding and today I'm like, start, I'm pretty much been weaning and like if I get through today without, then I'm done.

Did you cry?

No.

You're not emo about it?

I am e— like I have a lot of feelings about it, but not in like, uh, a I'm crying sort of way. It's definitely bittersweet, but I feel buoyed by the fact that as much as I was like ready to stop in these weeks. It sort of happened naturally between allergy season, getting sick, and traveling, and just like, it just all sort of came together. Like, last week I had allergies, I took Zyrtec, my supply went down, I was planning on stopping anyway. So like, it wasn't I had to do an abrupt stop, like, it just sort of ended for me. That was like with Charlie too, when he like popped a tooth, um, it was no longer a match, and that sort of made the decision for me. So I'm sort of glad that it worked out, um, and I was on my way down at the time that I was ready to be done.

Well, welcome back! We're so excited to have you.

I'm not like all the way back yet, but like we're back in.

But you made your Botox appointment?

Yeah, I made my Botox appointment, but like she's so busy, so it's not until the end of the month. Um, which gave me like a little wiggle room in case I like change my mind or whatever. I want to go a few days longer, change my mind in terms of like breastfeeding. So it's not like, oh, I'm getting Botox tomorrow, like I'm done. Uh, yeah, you know, cuz if I still am like making milk, I could like throw in a little, a little a little nursing session. So I'm so excited for my Botox. Like, oh my gosh, I'm so sick. Like, Zach's always like, what's wrong? I'm like, it's just how my face looks.

My face?

Yeah, it's just the way my eyes—

energy—

any bit of sunshine, I'm like furrowing. Any brightness, I look angry, but I'm not. I'm— that's just my forehead at the moment. So I'm like really excited for that.

Those who know you know, and deep inside, you're not an angry person.

No, no, I just haven't had Botox in 2 years. 2 years. Over 2 years.

It was his 50th birthday.

Can you believe over 2 years no Botox? Because I like— I know, I, I didn't do— I didn't plan well, you know.

Um, what a day. Don't you feel like yesterday was such a day? Yes. Like, my phone was just blowing up all day. And I love, love, love, love, love, love, love that when people see Alex Earl and Alex Cooper fighting, like, the first person they think of is me. I feel like I have been on to this since day one. Like, if you listen to this show, none of this is a surprise.

No, I'm sorry, it will always be a surprise to me when people—

that Alex Earl—

no, when people make things so public and such, like an admission. You know, I've said before, like, these days the girls don't beef. It's Cold War till the end. Like, no one is unfollowing another, talking trash. No one wants to be a mean girl. So when it happens, I am always surprised. I'm like, well damn, this doesn't happen anymore.

It's true. You know, I was actually thinking about that on my way to work this morning because I feel like a lot of the ways that people speculate online that two people are beefing is by whether or not they've liked their recent Instagram photos. And I remember like a year ago, my sister Margot sat me down and she was like, you never like my pictures. I'm like, I don't. I've seen all of them. Like, so we together like went on her Instagram. Jackie, I hadn't liked a photo of hers in like 3 years. I scroll like it's so much energy for me to leave a comment. Like, I try to be better about it. But just know, like, if I'm not not liking someone's shit, actually, like, I— it's not a slight. Honestly, if I'm liking their stuff, you should be more concerned.

Like, yeah, you have something to prove. Yeah.

Like, I'm so bad about it. Like, unless I really, like, see something and I'm shocked at how gorgeous you look, like, if it stops me in my tracks or you announce something, like, really big and major and I'm, like, actually shocked, like, then I will take— but for the most part, the way I engage, like, I say, yeah, no, I remember being like, you guys don't like my stuff.

And also, like, I know we're like sisters. We should comment on every single thing each other does. Like, that's just what you should do as sisters. But like, first of all, she posts a lot, and like, I just— my brain has been mushing. Like, how many times can I be like, the bunk is jumping? Like, I just feel sort of like stupid and uncreative, and so I get sort of nervous and I don't leave a comment. But then I realize, like, she'd rather just like a fire emoji than nothing.

Well, the place looks great. It always does.

Thank you. You know, the way She's an icon. She's a moment. I have not stopped saying that. And also, like, now when I'm excited for something, it's like, then one day I'll also know what it feels like to be there, to be waiting for it for weeks.

So we got our bat mitzvah. It's Olivia and Jackie's. But we told you guys this story last week that while we were cleaning out a closet, we finally found the VHS that we've been looking for for literally 15 years, which is the tape of Jackie and Olivia's bat mitzvah. I had it digitized. It's 90 minutes long. I have— it's on Dropbox. Like, I sent it to everyone. I haven't watched it. I think we plan on like watching it in full, but I scrolled through and like found really cute clips that I shared on our Instagram, and it brought me back to so— like, I know Margot now, our little sister, as like, you know, she's too cool for us, she's like sickening the house down, like putting looks together, corporate girl. I forget that like for the majority of our lives she was like our chubby-cheeked little sister who had like these two big front teeth and was just the cutest thing on the planet. Like, we We're so affectionate with her. We couldn't keep our hands off of her. She was so fucking cute and she loved us so much. And then she like grew up and hated us, of course.

But like, I forget that like that's what she used to be like, you know?

I do know. And I feel like when watching the video and the clips that we've seen, but I also haven't watched the whole thing, like of course like everyone's like shook by Claudia being so Claudia and like—

No, but there's nothing shook worthy about it. I'm exactly the same.

No, but like, you know, living for like you and living for me and— But for me, the takeaway from that video is Margo.

Is Sachi, of course.

Is Margo.

Claudia, your infectious spirit leaves us all laughing.

Like Margo, like in all the scenes we didn't post these where we're like all dancing and she's like working so hard. At one point she's like out of breath and you know, she's like up past her bedtime, like trying to keep up with the big kids. This is like the best night of her life. She's like dancing with her little best friend who had like, we were family friends, so she had like a friend there and she's like up on the stage, like following the moves of the dance motivator and like huffing.

It's just actually too much.

And the videographer like definitely knew that in 30 years like we'd want to see her in this moment, and he's like doing close-ups. He put some like remixes on her like where she's in black and white, like, yeah, like a little montage moment. It's really special, and I just, I love Margot so much, you know.

Oh, I love Margot so much. And the funny thing is like she was at the age where she had to—

guys, for all of you who tell her when we talk shit about her in the podcast, make sure to send her this.

What's funny is that like at that age, like we all had sort of started to like become who we are. Like I can see so many similarities. I was watching the candle lighting ceremony and Olivia's being so fucking bossy, like, and that's Olivia. Yeah. You are like giving side eye, but like, you know, front facing, like, yes, this is, and that's so you. Me like cracked out, rolling my eyes, like life of the party, flipping my hair around. I am that girl. But Margot like hadn't discovered who she was yet, so she's just this like I can't take it. Like, she's this little innocent, little like chubby cheeked, and you know, she got her hair straightened like for the first time and it's the best night of her life. She's been waiting for it for weeks and I just love her. I just love her.

Like, it made me so emo because there's a lot of times in the video where we're like talking and we're like so excited and you, I don't remember it this way, but in watching it, it's like clear that for so many like weeks and months leading up to the party, like in our house, it was just the biggest deal. Like all we'd been talking about, we did so much planning, like shopping for our dresses. And everything, and like you can just like see it on our faces. Like we've been waiting for this moment and now we know how it feels.

And the place looks great. It always does. Thank you.

It's a haiku.

I fucking love that video. Like it has given me new life. Actually, I played mahjong last night with my friends and it came up. And when I tell you I played the video again, they, we were, it was like silent laughter. Everybody had tears in their eyes. My friend Margo was actually crying. Just said, the place looks great. It always does.

No, and in the extended version, you like clipped a little bit for our Instagram, but you guys obviously spoke more. And like, she keeps talking about like the play, like the club and how the club looks.

I just, I can't. She's so sweet, Sachi.

Like, she's so sweet. How did you play last night? Mahjong?

Like ass.

Really?

Well, actually not like ass. So My friend Rachel is insane. This was— she's a savant. It was her first time even playing with the 2026 card. I was like, oh, you obviously have practiced for months. She was like, no, no, it's my first time playing. She's just like, uh, like very skilled at mahjong. She won every single game. And so many times I was getting so close, like multiple times. I didn't even play bad, actually. Yeah, she played insane. She won every game. She's so toxic.

She won every game.

We had a wall game.

Well, let me ask you something, like, if someone wins every game and they're so, so good at mahjong, like, does that make you want play with them? Not to shade Rachel, I'm just asking in general. Does that make you want to play with them more or less?

Less. I never want to play with Rachel again.

Right, right.

So I got into bed and Ben was like, you're really tense. I'm like, I lost.

Yeah, it's like you don't want to be too good cuz then nobody wants to play with you.

Okay, except though, like where Rachel lacks in like the always winning thing, she was moving the game along. Like, oh my God, my friends are so slow. Like it kills me. They were chatting and on their phones and getting snacks, and Rachel was like literally handing everyone their tiles. She actually said her etiquette— I've never heard this before— her etiquette is when it's your wall, you're required to push a piece to everyone. Like, nobody has to get their own.

Well, I love that. I'm always reaching over. I, I now I won't wear long sleeves. I'm playing Maj after this. I was trying to dress for Maj and the toast and I like, my brain was like breaking and I'm like, okay, let me just put on an outfit for the toast and then I'll change for Maj cuz I can't wear long sleeves. I knock over all the tiles.

Yeah, it was kind of a good system unless like it's your wall. Like, who wants to push out to everyone?

Oh, I don't mind. I'm really locked in when we play. Like The difference between playing here is like everybody plays at night.

In Florida, everyone plays during the day, and I really— I definitely prefer day.

People play at night here too. I just— I can't partake in those sorts of activities.

Everyone was at my house till 11 PM, and honestly, I wanted to play. 3 out of 4 of us wanted to keep playing, but Margo was like— not my sister, my friend Margo— she was like— and she lives the closest to me— she was like, I have to go home.

I mean, it sounds like a late, wild night.

We're so crazy.

We are so crazy.

Today's episode is just jam-packed. Like, Lix vs Lex has continued to develop. I imagine it'll be a developing story. Dave Portnoy has weighed in, Alex Earl has responded very briefly. Um, people are like speaking out, giving their theories, you know, dissecting both videos, comments, history, and it's just an exciting time. I'm sorry, I hate to be like schadenfreude where like two girls are fighting, but personally this is one of the best things to ever happen to me because like I said, I have— I feel so vindicated. Like, I have been following this story since the very beginning. I knew something was wrong the second she signed with Unwell. It was one of the worst business decisions There's nothing wrong with Unwell. It was just one of the worst business decisions on Alex Earle's part, but a slay on Alex Cooper's part, honestly.

Yeah, a major get for a new network.

Our clip, you know, we spoke about it very briefly yesterday, and I feel like I've had a lot of time to digest. And also it's been very interesting to see people's reactions because while I really wholeheartedly agreed with your assessment that whether you like Alex Earle or Alex Cooper better, you really like really can't deny that like the video and the position that that video put Alex Earle in was quite brilliant. Nobody agrees with that. Our video on TikTok like went so viral, they hate us. Um, kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself.

I feel like they hate— they misunderstood, because I felt like they thought we were taking a side in that clip, because you said at one point, I'm on Alex Cooper's side just because I'm so glad she's bringing this to the fore, but so that I could talk about it. But like, they misunderstood what you meant, because actually I feel kind of agnostic about this, and that's what's like a little bit frustrating for me, and also maybe for people listening, it's like I don't really feel like I'm going to throw my weight behind one side yet.

Me neither.

I'm waiting and seeing on this one.

Well, the internet has completely thrown their weight behind Alex Earl. Like, they didn't think Alex Cooper's video was— it's like, and when I say the internet, I mean TikTok. Like, this is really—

it—

my whole For You page, like, everyone is talking about this. So that's really where I think, like, I'm reading people. I don't know if they're talking about it on Reels or TikTok or Twitter or whatever, um, But TikTok, they just love Alex Earle. She's their girl, you know. She's never abandoned them, and she really, um, is very beloved. And we were talking about last week how it does feel like the Q score, the general like audience approval of Alex Cooper, has started to turn recently. I think she's like— people, you know, as they do, likability is a prison. You're only popular until you're not. People have just started to dislike her. And then take a look back at Sophia, like, and all the things. And so I think that's just working against her, although I don't I don't think that necessarily reflects any wrongdoing in this situation.

Yeah, yeah, no, that all makes sense. Like, you can like prefer Alex Earl more, but objectively, that was a shrewd move yesterday.

I agree.

But let's get into it in the stories. You want to jump in?

Um, anything else we want to talk about? Oh, broke my finger this morning. I bought a new nightstand. I was just like feeling crazy, um, and I was like, you know, moving shit around and like actually broke my finger. And of course I had to text Ben that it was his fault.

Was it?

Well, why weren't you home to help me with the nightstands that were delivered this morning, you know?

Yeah.

And why, why was it? Because where was he? Correct. Wow. Fucking— and like, literally, my finger is gonna be dead ass broken. It still hurts.

Ugh, I'm sorry.

It's just like— and I know I said yesterday, like, here I was praising Ben, like, let your husband do stuff, and it's like, I'm moving motherfucking furniture, right?

You could have waited. Alternatively, you could have waited, but I understand the excitement. New furniture.

I can't wait.

You want to see it in the space?

If there's something in my house that like will advance the house, yeah, I'm setting it up come hell or high water. People who like leave furniture like in boxes, girl, like that could never be me.

Yeah, no, it's very exciting to look at something new.

100%.

Yeah, that's like me in my kitchen. Yeah, which actually you'll see it in the vlog. Without further ado, here are the fast 5 stories that you to do need to know.

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You know, I know that like all this talk about period, this makes you feel so proud.

Proud, is that what you said? Yes, very proud. Our first story, continuing our conversation from yesterday about Licks versus Lex, two updates and change. But first, Alex Earl responded briefly to Alex Cooper's video. She reposted it and commented on the video demanding that she now spill the tea after weeks of passive aggression. I would say months, actually. She replied saying, okay, on it, with two exclamation points.

Do you think that the girl who made the original video, the Bravo mom, like, is she okay? I wouldn't be. Like, I literally wouldn't be.

She may not be okay after Dave Portnoy's video, right?

So then Dave Portnoy also chimed in, who was somebody I definitely like needed to hear from. Yeah, um, he did come at it definitely from like a defensive stance on behalf of Alex Cooper, and I respect that. Like, that's so—

I felt like he was very middle. I feel like he has good relationships with both of them. I feel like they are both big names in the industry and they're both not going anywhere, so I don't think anyone would want to be on the wrong side of either of them. I did not feel like he was taking a side in that video whatsoever.

Oh, I did.

You thought he was taking Alex Cooper's side?

Yeah, not in like such a heavy-handed way, but I think he's just defensive of her, um, which I get. And yeah, I thought he was taking it from her side. And he said something and then retracted because before he retracted, I was like, oh, this was a piece of tea I didn't know. He said a large part of their falling out had to do with Alex Earle's Carl's Jr. campaign, which if you don't know, like a year or two ago, she became like one of the new girls in the Carl's Jr. commercials, which are like in terms of pop culture, historically very iconic. It's like a sexy girl in a bathing suit eating a big burger like on a car. Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan. And the new age was the Alex Earle. I thought it was great. And he had referenced but then retracted suspected that that commercial played a large part in, um, their downfall, either because Alex Cooper wanted the gig for herself or because Alex Cooper felt she was entitled to a piece of it financially.

So here's what's confusing. Unwell is like a podcast network and a content network, but it's also a talent agency.

Yes, as far as I know, they signed one girl one time 10 years ago, and like, I don't know if they ever signed anyone else.

And as far as talent talent.

That girl Halle, who by the way was spotted making out at Coachella with Chase from Secret Lives.

But how do you know that she was signed as talent and not just podcast? Like, why is it—

it was a big announcement. I remember they're also just— they made a big announcement when they were like becoming also a talent agency, and they announced that their first girl was— their first client was Halle. And you know, she has a bunch of podcasts. Grace O'Malley Grace O'Malley's not a client of them as an agency. I think she has her own agent, you know, talent network.

So like, right, any brand deals or commercials—

that's what's confusing about Unwell. And I think they do well because they do so many things, but they are like a Deer Media where they're a network that hosts shows and sells ads for them. They're also like a UTA/WME talent agency where they have clients, question mark. They also produce movies, so they're like a production company. I don't know the names of any, like, you know. Oh, Sire, the ones that, uh, make all the Bravo shows, like Sirens or whatever. Um, they also host events, like, so I'm not 100%.

So in this capacity, it's unclear if, like, Alex Earl was part of Unwell as a talent agency. I don't think that she was.

No, she never was. They, they have the same agent. That also is— they have the same publicist for many years. Not anymore. They had the same agent at UTA who was doing all their deals. If Alex was doing Carl's Jr., like, that should not have been commissioned by Unwell unless maybe Unwell, like, a part of the thing was Unwell could produce it, produce it, the commercial, you know, something.

This is that when Dave said that, that was the first time I, I heard of Carl's Jr. playing a part in the demise of the relationship, but it might have been the first thing, like, maybe Unwell wanted a piece of it, but that just doesn't sound right. Unwell should get no piece of that.

Agreed. And maybe that's why Alex was pissed.

So, so name them. Just say that. Name them.

And then I just want to say, I know that he then released another video saying he spoke to Alex Cooper and Alex Cooper said she would never do that commercial, so that's not what it's about. I feel like there's a sliver of truth to something about the Carl's Jr. thing. Not that Alex Cooper wanted to be the one eating the burger because she doesn't give me that vibe at all. I don't think I've ever seen her in a bathing suit. She's actually quite modest, like always in her sweatpants. Um, but maybe more back end.

Yeah, yeah. Um, and that might have been the kickoff for things going south, and then, you know, bringing up things that happened before and things that happened after. So that was like an interesting tidbit. And then he also said the same thing, which is that Alex Earl should have never taken that deal. And that's what we said, and that's why it was never going to end well, because You go to a network like that, or even Barstool, it's a similar thing because like you benefit from the distribution and everybody else, and the—

they pay you less because you rely on them so much, right? A million things.

But to have such a big fish, she— it doesn't really work.

What I find so interesting about all of this is that I think Alex Earl would agree that going to Unwell was a bad call for her, um, and I think maybe even doing a podcast in general was a bad call for her, and she can, you know, take responsibility for that. But I also think, like, the people who encourage that decision— like I said, they shared a publicist and they shared an agent at the time, and Alex Earle still works with both of those people.

But, like, does Arias Cooper still work with both of those people?

So the shared publicist is actually not a publicist anymore. She, like, left the biz to do, like, brand consulting, and she does that.

And that's Kay Bailey, that day porn I was talking about.

She does that for Alex Earle, I believe. I think the Alex Cooper part is so curious to me because they were friends first. They were co-workers, partners, and then friends first— Kate Bailey and Alex Cooper. And then I remember when Alex Cooper got married, Kate Bailey wasn't there. And I know, like, you don't invite your publicist, you're what, but they were so close.

Yeah.

So that was the first time I was like, oh, they're not friends anymore. And then I heard a while later that they weren't even working together anymore. So I was like Oh, that's suspicious.

But you're saying she's also not a publicist anymore?

No, she's not. She does like brand consulting work, so she still works with some of her clients like Alex Earle. Okay, but not else.

Yeah, I guess she could have done brand consulting work over there.

Absolutely. So I think that's— but so they share an agent, they share a publicist, and like, wouldn't— don't you think Alex Earle would be mad at those people, the people who encouraged her to do it?

Yes.

No, but you know, everyone's responsible for their own selves, you know?

Like, yeah, no, no, but it's business. And so like, if you made me— like, led me to make a bad business decision, like, that's not the sort of business I want to be in.

Like, and I think that's why her dad is so involved in her business, because he thinks that maybe she was mismanaged in the beginning. Yes.

So it is curious if Alex Earl wound up staying with these people who walked her into a bad business decision and Alex Cooper didn't, even though it was a good decision for Alex Cooper. She had nothing— of course, everything to gain. Which makes it not make sense, which makes me feel like this isn't the story exactly.

No, I don't think it has to do with the public. Like, a lot of people are looking a lot into Kate Bailey as something because she's not— I think her and Alex Cooper maybe had like a personal falling out, and then she had a career change and ended up doing something else and doing it with Alex Earle. I don't think that that's what this is about. I really don't. I don't know what it's about.

No, I don't think they're like fighting over the girl, but it's just curious to me if like those people helped Alex Earl make this poor decision that like she continues to make decisions with them.

100%.

So something doesn't add up. And that's what I mean, Alex Earl has a lot of explaining to do.

Yeah, she said— what format? What do you think we're getting? Like, uh, she could do her Get Real With Me YouTube podcast.

You think she could Get Real With Me YouTube podcast with Sophia Franklin?

So a lot of people say she could go on Sophia with an F, although that I don't think would be— it would be like tea, but I don't think it would be the best way for her to get her story across. I think she should seriously just sit down, do her makeup, and do a TikTok like the way she— because Alex's was TikTok. Yeah, show her receipts or whatever. Like, I'm so sad.

Yeah.

And just for anyone listening on today's show, like, if Alex Earl's drops a video or something, like, seriously, sound the alarms. Don't let us go the whole show. Okay, can everyone hear me? Yeah.

Okay, she should do a Get Real With Me with her dad where he explains why the business was not businessing.

Interesting. Now, people did, of course, do some digging. The video Alex Huber posted is old.

What does that mean?

So because on Sunday night, no, did I say Alex Earl? I meant Alex Cooper.

You said Alex Cooper.

Okay, so Alex Cooper on Sunday night was at Coachella, posted a mirror picture with her friends. Yeah, she had red nails, ruby red, like dark nails. The video, she has like a grown-out, like, so it's like an old light, light, light nude manicure, and she has a pimple on her chin. And she has that same pimple. This is somebody put it together on TikTok. I think her name was Katie. Shout out. The pimple was also featured in Alex Warren's podcast episode, covered up, but we saw it.

You guys, you can't breathe. First of all, that makes no sense because Alex Earle hadn't reposted Bravo Mom when she recorded Alex Warren.

Oh, that's really true.

So I think it's lit— it's from like Friday before she got her nails done from for Coachella, and she has a pimple in roughly the same area. Like, I'm sorry, that girl can't even have a pimple. That makes no sense. Okay, okay, okay, okay, right, because she said reposts in her video, right? Didn't she?

Yeah, she did. No, you're right, you're right, you're right.

It's really not that difficult. But wow. Yeah, wow, the nail polish, it's giving like, uh, The Hills when like Lauren Conrad like filmed a breakup conversation with Brody like after a night out, but her nail polish was different. And like people realized it was like not at the same time.

When I was pregnant with Ruby, like people literally knew my due date because like when I found out I had decided to do this like insanely red, bright, and then like they matched it up with the toast and like they literally knew when I was pregnant. Um, oh my God. So I, I get the same nails, like you said, and not for this reason, but, but like they grow out to one color.

Like sometimes I'll record an ad that needs to get like approved. So, uh, and it's like something with my, like I'm holding something so you can see my nails are growing out and then like I have to post it the next day. But I got a manicure later that day. I feel like such a—

such a fraud. Such a fraud. So I do want to say, I think the best way, because especially because TikTok is so on her side, they didn't think Alex's video was a slay. They thought it was cringe the way she was talking to camera. Like, they didn't think she was serving. And so they're just— the comments I've heard, Alex Cooper's like deleting a lot of comments. I saw people saying that.

People always say that. People say that about us all the time. I never delete comments.

No, like, maybe your comment sucks. And so it went to the bottom.

No, like, I never— I just don't— I don't know where your comment went. I didn't delete it.

No, and I love when I— when people comment like, oh, we're deleting comments, I see. And it's like, that's the number one comment. Like, no, we're actually not. Look at your comment, you know what I mean?

You're still here.

Um, also, I think TikTok is the best forum for this for many reasons, including that.

Yeah, it just like— it kind of sucks. Like, like, I just feel like for Alex Earle, it's just even her commenting on the video, like, okay on it, it's like Alex Cooper's sort of like already winning and like telling her what to do.

Yeah, control.

Yeah, like, so I, I look forward to the video. Hopefully it's like— we're running low on time here.

Yeah, this, this needs to happen quickly.

It does need to happen quickly. And I want to say, like, I know people on TikTok are saying Alex Huber wasn't a— like, whatever. Object— I'm looking at this objectively because I have no horse in this race, and I feel like I actually have a little bit of expertise on the matter because we do a podcast and we're in the biz and we work with the network. So I feel like a pretty good—

no, And I have to say, like, I've met Alex Earl. She's unbelievably nice, like, a little— really before she blew up. And she still, like, still follows me. She still likes my stuff. Like, she's actually, like, a nice girl.

You actually have bias?

Well, uh, I guess, because I've never met Alex Cooper.

We had a meeting with her one time.

She follows me, um, and I wouldn't say she's, like, heavily engaged with my content. If she does want the toast to start, like, skewing pro-Cooper, like, throw me a like.

So you can be— yeah, you could be bought is what you're saying.

No, no, I can't be, but I'm just like, you know, of course your own personal interactions with people are gonna sway. And like, Alex Earl is just like, she's kind of like above and beyond. She follows Sachi. Like, she's— me and Sachi met her at like this—

she—

yeah, she's like a queen like that. Like, I'm sorry.

Well, you know, I met her right as she was taking off.

Like, and you know what, I do feel like her— it really kind of speaks to her character that like she has so many friends people love her. She's always making new friends in the industry, and I don't think you can really say that about Alex Cooper. I think like a criticism of her is that like she has no friends in the industry, um, in terms of like the other podcasting swirlies and influencers. Yeah, and influencers, right? And like maybe she's just on another level. Like she's friends with Margot Robbie, right? But I do think it speaks to the, you know, the content of your character when like you're just constantly like people beloved by people in a personal sense. I'm not talking about like the audience. And I don't think Alex Cooper has that. I think that's just like something people say about her a lot is that like she's never with the people. And but maybe she doesn't want to be. Like maybe she wants to do her job and go home to like her family. So it's not 100%.

Miley Cyrus is calling her like, sorry, I know she doesn't want to go to your influencer event. Screaming.

But like even, even before she was at this level, like she was never engaging. I think she's always had this kind of like superiority complex. So I think that's why people are just more inclined to side with Alex Cooper before— I mean, Alex Earl— before they even know anything.

Yeah, they just like her more. And I— so I feel like then I'm the last man standing for like, really, I'm not going to be biased about the situation and I'm going to call it like I see it. Yeah, because does Alex Earl follow you? No, I don't think so.

I feel like she follows the toes. She's so generous with her follows, you know what I mean?

And I don't even want to know if she follows me. And I think Alex Cooper follows me, and I'm still not going to take any sides.

No, uh, I just want to let him know, like, I can be bought.

Crying.

I can be bought. Sally. Let's see.

Okay, Alex Earl does not follow me. Alex Cooper does, and I'm still not going to let that affect my decision. So all I was trying to say is I'm looking at this so objectively. I really have no horse in this race. And what I was saying, we have like some, you know, insider info, and we do this for a living, so Objectively, I can say Alex Cooper's video was a slay. That's just a fact. And you might not like her, so you're saying that it's not, but it was. She put Alex Earl in a rough spot that she can come climb out of.

Yep, but that's exactly what happened to James Charles. It was like, James is over, party. This is dramageddon, I'm telling you. Everyone was saying James Tati's video, bye sister. James, uh, Jeffree Star, literally James Charles was dead in the water. And then he put up that video, 42 motherfucking minutes with receipts, proof, timeline, fucking everything. It was a master class in how to get yourself out of a hole. I don't even know if everything he said was true. Like, I didn't even care because I was just back on his side. Like, and then people started ping-ponging so much it didn't even matter, and it all came out in the wash. Like, yeah, so she absolutely can. Like, call James Charles, my friend.

Yeah, but round one Cooper. We have Cooper in the lead, but this is just subjective. So like, and I like, I'm not— I just want to see the story and I'll make my decision from there. I'm not going to let what people, other people's opinions, or everyone's saying like this or that. So I think it's just me, you know. I don't know that anybody else can really say that, that they're looking at this so objectively. Everybody else has like their faves.

I have like a— I have like a— like, yeah, no, I feel like you have like— like you should have like a little bit of bias on like one particular matter.

Text me the matter. No, I could have bias, but I'm like— I'm being like a jury member, you know what I mean?

Where I'm like, yeah, but I think it's hard for you to be completely objective, uh, completely unbiased.

That's not a— we have a typo.

Oh, fuck.

Okay, for real.

No, no, no.

And there's things, but I'm, I'm committed.

Oh, you're not gonna say it? Okay, okay.

I'm committed to staying objective on the matter. I would really like to try and do that like a journalist.

Alex Cooper once referred to us as that podcast.

Oh, when she's— yes, even though— yes, okay, yes, yes, yes. I'm gonna be like, that was like—

that was unnecessary.

That wasn't— but even when you're like on the jury, like, and sometimes you're like, oh, I have a conflict, you know, and they're like, nah, you're still gonna be on the jury, put it out of your mind. That's gonna be me.

It takes a lot of mental fortitude to do that. I feel like I'm pretty unbiased as well, honestly.

Like, even though you just said you're biased.

Well, it's hard to be completely unbiased. Like, we work with these people, we speak to these people, like, we have interactions with these people, so I just want to be honest with everyone. Like, that's what I am speaking objectively, but also from a little colored by my own personal experience.

I mean, I did get Real Activist PR, so they're going to find that, like, and kick me out of the jury.

100%.

Your Honor, Exhibit A, C, jury member, juror number 9.

You're so the rural juror.

I so am.

Oh my gosh.

And everything I've— you can find everything I said about Sally.

Yeah, you are the opposite. Of a totally— what's the word I'm looking for?

Unbiased? Objective?

Is objective like also mean unbiased?

Yes.

Okay, so that's the word I'm looking for.

Okay. Okay, so like we're saying to him, we're watching the space, it should be any minute now.

I know something's gonna happen the second we're on alert.

Like someone can barge in and let us know. No, I know it's going to drop like 20 minutes after the episode goes up, but you know what, I wouldn't really mind that because it's nice to have a moment to like process how you feel about it as like a juror on the matter. They do, as a jury, to review the evidence, right?

Deliberation.

Are you ready for our next story? Yeah, news that makes sense, I guess. Brooke Snader and her sisters are embarking on a polar expedition in support of women's health research.

So I want to say something.

Alternate headline: Brooke Snader and her sisters will do anything for a check.

Okay, so Before I dive in, I want to say two absolute truths. Women's health research is so important. It's a grossly underfunded sect of research.

Yeah.

And two, I would actually, like, lay my life out on the line, take a bullet for Brooke Snider. I love her so much. Okay. Those two things notwithstanding, what the fuck is this? Like, genuinely, this was so random.

Like, on Brooke's Instagram, I was like, No, and they did like a sexy Arctic shoot to where they're like naked in bikinis on a snow mountain. I thought it was a Skims campaign.

I thought it was a Prada campaign because they had a big Prada jacket.

Yeah, no, it's, um, it's Women's Health Research. So Brooks and her sisters, uh, will be experiencing subzero temperatures and they will face, uh, a polar expedition through the Arctic Circle in order to have their bodies studied in these climates. The study aims to explore how cold temperatures, isolation, and disrupted light-dark cycles, which are conditions that mirror those found in space, affect women's hormonal balance, menstrual cycle, sleep patterns, and overall physiological adaptation. It sounds like they're trying to answer the question, what happens to your period in space?

No. Okay, never mind, I take back everything I said. This is a great initiative, and I love that Brooks is the face of it.

When you put 4 girls from South Louisiana in one of the coldest environments in the world, there's going to be some drama, Brooks joked. Sleep will also be challenging. The sun doesn't set this time of year, which sounds magical until your body has no idea what time it is. But that's exactly what researchers are studying— how extreme environments affect our sleep cycles. I guess in the past, like, they have had this information on how sleep disruption affects sleep cycles, but they've conducted it on men and they haven't conducted it on women. Now typically that would sound like an injustice, um, but I think it's really kind that they didn't make women go through this. And now we have 4 brave women ready to brave the odds.

I have a question, teacher. Who's paying them for this? Like, what's the brand? Do you know what I mean? Like, is it a hospital? Like, who—

like, the initiative is by Extreme Research Extreme Environment and Reproductive Sleep and Circadian Health. It's led by a doctor from University of Arizona Center for sleep.

So again, is this like a big check, or is it like— what the hell is this?

I think it's a big check, and it's content for their show that still isn't back yet, because this is so something Kardashians would have done those early seasons, like a sleep study, for sure.

Yeah, this is like the modern version of like those PETA campaigns, or like the duct tape on your mouth, N-O-H-A No hate.

It's not even because they're the only ones doing it.

I'd rather go naked than wear fur. Yeah, that was like a, uh, that was a storyline on Keeping Up early season.

Yeah, but like all celebrities were doing that and all you had to do was like take a picture of yourself. Like that was like the ice bucket challenge. This is just like 4 sisters.

No, there was like a formal no hate. Yeah, you had photoshoot and also milk.

Got milk.

Yeah, but, but no, this seems like a one of one, like I'm seriously cracking up. Brooke Seder is so funny. I just love her. Like, I'm sorry, you will never catch me saying a cross word about her.

No. And I guess soon we'll know what would happen to your menstrual cycle if you were in the Arctic. And that's a question that needs answering.

And as somebody who menstruates and spends a lot of time in the Arctic, I am glad for this.

Yeah, thanks girls.

Important work we're doing.

Are you ready for our third story?

Mhm.

Ruby Rose accuses Katy Perry of sexual assault. Katy—

so what's so funny— not that there's anything funny about this, but I saw this story before the toast yesterday and I almost brought it up, but I thought it was AI because it was like so insane.

Yeah, and you kind of need to like read the details. Can't just like be like, oh, she tweeted Katy Perry assaulted her. So here we have more information, and Katy Perry's rep is slamming the claim as categorically false and a dangerous lie. So it all sort of started sort of randomly because Katy Perry tweeted during Justin Bieber's performance at Coachella saying, thank God he has premium, I don't want to see no ads. And like Complex posted Katy Perry's tweet saying like that, and everybody thought it was so funny, hysterical. I mean, it's just really comedy gold.

She also said it like on video. Somebody was filming Justin's set and then panned to her. She's like, thank God he has premium. Like, it was such a genuinely like millennial joke. I mean, people were like eating it up. I saw it all over. Katy Perry cracks hilarious joke.

And Complex was like— they wrote it up as well. And Ruby Rose responded to their tweet saying, Katy Perry has sexually assaulted me at Spice Market nightclub in Melbourne. Who gives a shit what she thinks?

No, by the way, I saw this on this— on Twitter yesterday. I thought it wasn't real because She goes on to describe the incident like extremely graphically, saying that like Katy Perry literally put her vagina on Ruby Rose's face, and that Ruby Rose then threw up on her.

And in the past, she's told the story to be like a funny little drunk story, she said, because she didn't know how else to handle it. Later, she said Katy agreed to help Ruby get her US visa, so she kept it a secret. She said, but I did tell y'all she wasn't a good person. She said, I was only in my early 20s. I'm now 40. It has taken almost 2 decades to to say this publicly, though I am so grateful to have made it long enough to find my voice. It just shows how much of an impact trauma and sexual assault takes. Thank you for seeing me. Now, just for Katy Perry's side of things, her rep has responded to this and said the allegations being circulated on social media by Ruby Rose and Katy Perry are not only categorically false, they are dangerous, reckless lies. Miss Rose has well-documented history of making serious public allegations on social media against various individuals, claims that have been repeatedly Denied by those named.

I know this isn't the point, but like this whole story just reminded me of that like 2-year period where Ruby Rose was so fucking famous. Like Taylor Swift's best friend, Orange Is the New Black, like, and then she's like the coolest thing that ever happened. She was the coolest, like hottest thing, and then she really like disappeared. Not that's the point, but I just like was reminded of her. I forget about her.

Yeah, I wonder why. I feel like it wasn't by accident, you know?

No, I feel like she like didn't want to play the game, or like she made an enemy in Hollywood, because it's giving blackballed.

Yeah, it is giving blackballed, and I do feel like she has a a lot of enemies.

Yeah, Katy Perry now number one. I don't know if this is true, I don't know if it's false. It's disgusting.

Um, it's disgusting if true. It's also just kind of like a crazy— I guess this is like how she wants to share her truth now, but it's kind of like a crazy way to just like, you know, throw this out there. She said she doesn't want to file any claims, she just wants everyone to know. I don't know what we're supposed to do with that.

Yeah, I, I agree with that assessment. Like, I don't know what to say.

Yeah. Horrible if true, horrible if false, right? I'm just gonna like set that one down and, and like make your own assumptions, or not, or, you know, like, or not. I don't think we should assume anything. I don't know Ruby, I don't really know Katie, I don't know Katie.

I guess, I guess that'll be interesting to see if anybody else comes out because I feel like that's when it happens, like when somebody makes an allegation and then like 2 or 3 people say like something similar, or that always— I feel like it's like the nail in.

This isn't like a move you pull once, you know.

A what? A move you pull once.

Yeah, rubbing like—

and if you're a vagina in someone's face, I am curious if anyone else will speak out. I'm not sure if they will.

Yeah, so just— we'll just set that down. Our next story, some more Coachella adjacent news. My boy Lewis Capaldi is reacting to being mistaken for Lewis Hamilton. On Kim Kardashian Coachella date. So by the way, Kim Kardashian and Lewis Hamilton were at Coachella together.

They are confirmed dating, and clap if you care.

I, I don't— it didn't even make the recap, you know. For so long it was like rumored to be dating, spotted in Paris, weekend tryst, then she was like on his Instagram in like a soft launch sort of way, and then they were together at Coachella, um, and they are.

I just I don't care.

No, I don't.

And I don't even feel like the internet cares. I don't feel like people are— sometimes someone, something happens and I feel like the internet's trying to get me to care, and it's like, I don't. I feel like nobody's talking about this, even though he's one of the biggest athletes in the world.

He's the biggest athlete in the world. It'd be like if she were dating Cristiano Ronaldo, like the—

which I would care about.

Well, I would care because he's like married with children, so that would be weird.

Correct.

Um, but like, so he's like the male Kim Kardashian. She couldn't be dating a bigger star and like nobody cares.

And I just personally ship him with Nicole Scherzinger. You know, they were together for many years.

Oh, very cute.

And I think he also dated somebody in Little Mix. Am I right about that or no?

I don't know that.

That I might be making that up.

So anyway, someone posted like a video of Kim and Lewis at Coachella and it said Lewis Capaldi spotted with Kim Kardashian at Coachella. They obviously got his name wrong. And Lewis Capaldi responded saying, 'Wow guys, not cool. Such an invasion of our privacy.' I love it.

So funny. He's such a good celebrity.

Do you know how much more interested I would be in this story if it was Kim dating Lewis Capaldi?

That's what I'm always saying. Like yesterday we were talking about Jacob Elordi and Kendall Jenner. Like, I just want to be surprised every now and then. Like, that's why Lewis Hamilton is so uninteresting to me. Oh, the most beautiful woman in the world is going for like the biggest athlete, the hottest guy. Like, great. Like, it's just so uninteresting. Like, that's why—

date someone ugly, date someone short, date someone fat. Like, Pete Davidson was so interesting. That was different worlds, different age gaps.

Like, yeah, like Shake It Up Chicago.

It's really like, it defies logic how the most— you would think it would be like, technically Kim and Louis is like Kim and Kanye, two of the biggest people in their fields, and we just don't care. Even if she were dating Tom Brady, maybe we'd be a little more interested, but maybe not.

Maybe I'm also not that interested because I quite literally zero knowledge of F1 as a sport. Like, I know nothing about Lewis Hamilton's career. I know nothing about the sport. Like, Tom Brady I'm more familiar with. Like, I'm invested in his personal life, and I watch football, and I was like watching his games when he was winning. So maybe that would be more interesting to me. But again, it's just like, it's so boring to me. It's not a creative choice. I just want somebody to like— that's why, like, just date a normie. Do something different.

Yeah, yeah. Well, um, I'm happy for Lewis Capaldi.

Me too. I'm glad, like, I'm glad this happened.

Yeah, and I think maybe it could be like one of those meet-cutes where it's like, oh, I'm not dating Louis Capaldi, but who's that? And then they just like sort of get together, and then you get Louis Capaldi to like sing you to bed every night and write songs for you.

Before you go, you know.

I, I know he's another one. I know, that's like a son to me. You know, he's— yeah, he's one of my sons.

Louis Capaldi goes platinum in your Tesla.

1,000%. He's one of my celebrity sons. I have a lot.

Oh, add it to the family tree. Harry Jowsey, Alex Warren, Louis Capaldi. Who else?

I feel like there was one more. Oh, Charlie Puth.

Of course. Of course.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

Oh my God, right before Dear Toasters. Is it our fifth and final story that's brought to you by Roback?

Yeah, turd back.

So I think this happens to everybody every single year, and today's the perfect example of it. You know, spring starts, just kind of gets sprung on you, if you will, and you just have the will to live again. You know, it's the best season ever. The weather improves, everyone's in a better mood. It's getting dark later, and suddenly you have convinced yourself that you need an entirely new wardrobe. And you do. You do. This year, our spring shopping obsession is Raw Back. Last month we were going on and on about their active skorts and dresses that they launched, which are so cute, great for warmer weather. But they also just launched a new lounge set, and we'd like to discuss it. So, you know, whenever I'm talking about Rohback, I'm always like, it's so soft, it's so soft. But this set is really on another level. I'm kind of a loungewear expert, and I only accept the best. And it's one of the softest fabrics, the Rohback loungewear. Um, it's perfect for spring because it's short sleeve, the top, and has matching bottoms and a very elevated soft fabric that feels very luxe. It's called the Aspire set, which is very correct because when I put it on, you're gonna aspire to look like me.

Um, it's comfortable, it's chic, it's effortless. It comes in ivory, coastal blue. Choosing between the two is going to be difficult, so maybe get both if you want to. And then also check out Rohback's entire website. I love their stuff for men. Um, a lot of people don't know that their men's stuff is completely slept on. And if you're looking for loungewear for your man so he doesn't look like, you know, unemployed— because I think a lot of men wearing loungewear is like icky— I love the ones from Rohback. It's like very tailored. Use code TOAST on rohback.com for 20% off your first order through the end of this week. That's R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com. Www.thredup.com, code Toast for 20% off. Today's episode is also brought to you by a new sponsor, Salt and Stone. And you know what, I was hanging out with Shannon Ford over the weekend, and she like always smells so good and smells the same. And actually, my hair started to smell like her when I hung out with her for like 2 days, and it just made me jealous. Like, I love the concept of having a signature scent, and I think Salt and Stone is a great example because they make so many good products like deodorant and body wash.

Like, to have like a full body scent, do you know what I mean?

Wash, you guys, the body wash It's so hotel.

It's 5-star resort. It's very rich.

Amazing. I discovered it on my own organically, and then I learned that everybody like was onto it already. I discovered it last year when I was trying to find like a clean, like nice body wash while I was pregnant, like for the Hamptons. I just wanted to like feel amazing, and it changed my life. Now it's the only body wash I will use.

So they have, um, their Salt and Stone Discovery sets have 4 scents: Santal and Vetiver, Bergamot and Hinoki, Saffron and Cedar, and Neroli and Basil. They're most popular.

I'm a Santal.

That doesn't surprise me. You're so Santal.

Yeah.

Um, the deodorant is award-winning. It's aluminum-free. It's formulated for 48-hour protection, and they actually sell one of their deodorants every 5 seconds. That's how popular it is. Their products are carefully made with a blend of antioxidant and nutrient-rich ingredients. So try Salt Stone's Discovery Set to find your perfect scent. Go to saltandstone.com/toast and use code toast at checkout for 15% off your first order. That's saltandstone.com/toast and use code TOAST, T-O-A-S-T, for 15% off. Today's episode is also brought to you by BetterHelp. So financial stress is something I think everyone can relate to, and it affects far more than our bank accounts. It actually can take a really serious toll on your mental health and your relationships. Money worries bring anxiety, sleep disruption, even depression. And one of the— it's one of the leading sources for conflict, um, within couples. So this month, let's normalize the emotional weight of financial stress and remind you that struggling with money does not mean that you have failed. So sometimes all you need is just take a second, talk to somebody about it, and BetterHelp is such a great option if you've been looking to get into therapy. So therapists, uh, BetterHelp is therapy done entirely online, and they have really quality therapists who work according to a strict code of conduct.

They are fully licensed in the US. BetterHelp will do the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. A short questionnaire helps you identify your needs and your preferences, and their 12+ years of experience and industry-leading match fulfillment rate means that they typically get it right the first time. However, if you are not happy with your match, you can also switch to a different therapist at any time from their tailored, tailored recommendations. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, and they've served over 6 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million client reviews. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/toast. That's betterhelp.com/toast to get 10% off when you sign up today. Betterhelp.com/toast. Betterhelp.com/t-o-a-s-t. Thank you, T-U-R-T. You're welcome. No breaking Alex Cooper Earl news, right?

No, nothing that I saw. Um, our fifth and final story: Summer House's Amanda Batula has the munchies for Jimmy John's in a new 420 campaign that just dropped. Um, Amanda Batula is teaming up with Jimmy John's to celebrate 420, and a couple other, um, stars— famous potheads, famous potheads. Who are these individuals? We have Cal Penn, You know him. I saw— I had— what do I know him from? I guess I could—

so classic, like he's just like an actor.

He's an actor.

Okay, I didn't know he engaged in cannabis drugs.

So yeah, the thing is that it's Jimmy John's, so they're sandwiches, but it's like the Dream Rotation menu, and the sale goes from like April 13th.

It's like a play on the thing kids say, like Dream Blunt Rotation, but it's like Dream Sandwich Rotation, and it's like a 420 And on 4/20, I guess like you order a lot of Jimmy John's.

So they like brought on some famous potheads, including Kal Penn, Cheech Marin, and Skylar Gisondo and Amanda Bhatula, who, you know, in this season of Summer House, Kyle said that she smokes every night and she was like the darling of weed up until 2 weeks ago. But this campaign already shot and other people got paid. And so we're airing it. We're doing it.

I want to say something. I obviously this campaign is not for me. I don't smoke pot or eat Jimmy John's, right? However, I imagine that they had a conversation about whether they would air the commercial. You know, Amanda Petula, you know, she was famously dropped from her most recent campaign after this big scanda-val with Edie Parker. And I remember, I believe I made them Weenie of the Week because they're just like so fickle and weenie. And I kind of really respect the hell out of Jimmy John's for not like throwing this campaign away. It's a good commercial, okay? And you know what, Amanda being in it, I would never be talking about this commercial before that. Like, even when she was beloved, like, okay, she did a lot of ads. Like, I don't know, I like that they kept this on air or wherever it was supposed to be.

Yeah, it was on Instagram. All the comments were like, oh, I'm going to Jersey Mike's now.

And like, you're not, because it's so ingrained. People are so like— it's your religion, Jersey Mike's versus all the other sandwich shops, right? Or Jimmy John's, whatever. People, you're not going to switch it up because Amanda's in a commercial. Like, sorry, you're just not.

Yeah, I don't think they were even like trying to take a stance against cancel culture or anything. They just like spent a lot of money and it's dumb to cancel it over like the sale is happening. Like, we've got to let people know. So Correct. No, like, yeah, and again, it's not like she's like a criminal or anything, it's just she's sort of fallen out of favor. But we've got sandwiches to sell, so here you go.

I just feel like in this day and age, like, no one would do this. Like, everyone's so afraid of being a part of any sort of conflict that I do respect this. I'm sorry, I do. I don't think they were looking for respect, I think they were just looking to save money. But like, big losers like Edie Parker— I'm sorry, I think that's losery. Oh, you liked them enough to include them with your campaign, like, wait, you know, to see how things sort of shook out. Yep. Sorry, I like this.

Uh, agreed.

Let's dive into Dear Toasters. What do you say? Okay, our weekly advice segment. Every Tuesday, Jackie and I try to give back to our community, a little bit of philanthropy. Sometimes you guys find yourself in sticky situations, whether your husband's doing something weird, your coworker's being a bitch, you're in a bridal party that's a nightmare. Whatever it is, if you need advice and you always wanted to get it from your two favorite podcasters, you can do it. Deartoasters@gmail.com, send us an email, write us, tell us what's going on in your life. Keep it brief, like need-to-know information. Um, or head over to thetoastpodcast.com, our website, and scroll down. There's a little submission box, says Dear Toasters. Both methods are totally anonymous. We will never say your name or any identifying details. Okay, you ready? Jackson Claude, I just gave birth to my first baby a month ago, and my husband wants to buy himself a $4,000 watch to, quote, commemorate her birth. For context, he did buy me a push present of my choosing, but I was much more realistic asking for a ring that was under $1,000. Is this not ridiculous? It is essentially a push present for him when he didn't push out a baby.

Please let me know if I'm just being a brat or if this seems like a frivolous thing for a new dad to do. Yeah, no, I mean, I guess if I— I just want to say I respect his ingenuity and like reframing it as, you know, I'm commemorating her birth because you almost got me. I'm not gonna lie. But his commemorative gift being 4 times the price of yours is just unacceptable. And I, I hate when people are like so frivolous with money at the wrong time. Yeah. Like we just had a baby.

No, but like say they have like, you know, a ton of money.

Yeah.

And that's how he wants to spend it. I would say like, fine then, but he also needs to get one for you. Like his matching, his gift for the baby can't be bigger than yours. So if he wants to get a watch for himself, then he also has to get an equal value or nicer watch for you. So like, just let him know that. Let him know that and see if he still wants to get a watch for himself.

I would, however, just keep an eye out for this man. He's not gay. I'm just— I'm not going there. I want you to know. But while it is funny that he's like rebranded his push present as like a commemorative, it's like low-key manipulative. I could just see him being manipulative. I just want to say, like, I think he— I can sense that within him. Not that he's done anything so bad, but just keep an eye on it.

And like a lesson to you, like, dream bigger next time.

Okay. A lesson to you. Dream bigger next time.

Yeah, you're very sweet, Birkin.

But I also respect— because I felt the same way. Obviously it went the way of the horse and buggy, but like when I was pregnant towards the end and giving birth, I was like so stressed. Like I was like, we need to cut down, we have to start saving for school. Like I respect people who are like fiscally responsible at a time like this. So like your husband wanting to get not one but two gifts and his is four times the price, like it's giving girl, get out of here.

Yeah. I agree.

Like, just no. How about just no? Yeah, no is a full sentence. You can't have your watch. Next, go change a diaper. Hi, Jackson Claude. I need your help as I've witnessed something at work that I still haven't fully processed. The other morning in the break room, I caught my coworker quietly dumping a handful of plastic forks from her purse into our communal plastic utensil box. I of course asked her what she was doing, and she very casually explained it, that after she uses a plastic fork, she takes it home, washes it, and then brings it back so it can be reused by her coworkers. She does not inform anyone that she is doing this and acted like it was completely normal, which honestly might be the most unsettling part. Now I can't stop thinking about how many lunches I have eaten with a fork that has been to a stranger's house, not to mention is leaking in toxic BPA. Yeah. Do I confront her or just accept that I will never touch that utensil box ever again? Signed, a pregnant BPA-conscious toaster. There's so many elements of this that are so weird. Like, I'm sorry, I know you can say what you want about plastic cutlery.

It is disposable. It's not meant to be washed.

No, it's actually—

regular forks are poor.

So harmful is to put that stuff in the dishwasher and the heat, not even, not even hot water, even like leaches plastic. Yucky.

Actually, I keep my box of plastic utensils because it's just something I can't part with on top of my toaster oven. And I actually—

it's leaching plastic.

Yeah, yesterday I threw it out. I was like, no, it's bad, it's wrong.

So Never use a fork from your office again. Obviously this woman needs to be educated and she needs to be stopped in her tracks. What is she doing? Who gives a fuck? They're the office forks. Maybe at your house if you want to save money and reuse, even though like, and you want to use plastics in the name of saving, of waste management, that's your business.

Reusing disposable cutlery, like there's cutlery that's not disposable, so just use that. Yeah.

No, she absolutely has to be stopped. You need to tell everyone about this.

Everyone, tattle.

Paul Revere, sound the alarm. The BPAs are coming.

Because that's unsafe for everyone. Even beyond the plastic, because I know some people like aren't moved by— they say it's a conspiracy theory, plastic. Like, not everyone is plastic obsessed. Fine. The sheer unsanitary nature of taking home in your purse, like, loose in— you don't know where she lives. Loose forks hanging in her purse with hair. She don't know where she lives and how she cleans them. It's so unsanitary. Like, this is actually—

you should also tell HR. I don't think she could be trusted in the work. Like, what is she doing in her work if she has such bad decision-making skills in her personal life?

Check her expense report too. She's obviously just like a liar.

This is so wrong. And you don't even have to be like a crunchy, crazy person to not want to use a plastic fork that's been in the dishwasher and like eat all that plastic. That's just obvious. Mm-hmm. Yuck.

Our third and final: Hey Jax and Claude, my husband and I recently moved houses. While moving, I found a very long fake fingernail under my side of the bed. This was very suspicious to me as this fingernail was not one that could have come from anyone that we know. I wanted to ask my husband about it, but I ultimately decided not to in the moment. We've been married for 8 years. We have 2 kids and one on the way. But I can't stop thinking about this now. Do I ask my husband about it? I already threw it away. Is it too late? Should I just move on?

I don't think it's an affair.

He's obviously like a crossdresser, right? Is that what you do?

What if it was like in the year that— how long have they lived in the house? I could— it have been a cleaning lady? Like, could have been anyone who ever stepped foot into your room that wasn't you or him? Like, I—

on her side of the bed though, it's so specific. It's not like it was, you know, under the desk. Like, if he's— let's just say he's entertaining women, he's obviously going to go to his side of the bed.

Yeah, for himself, right?

And so the nail being found on her side of the bed means the girl was on her side.

How could someone be having an affair in your bed as a mother of two small children? Like, how could that ever— when would they have the time? That room is booked and busy.

I don't think it's 100% a smoking gun. And if you want to sit on this, especially you're pregnant Don't do anything yet. But I feel as though maybe the Lord has given you a sign.

Keep it in the files.

That you should, it's a brick on the yellow brick road. I would just keep walking, keep your head on a swivel, you know, look for perfume, lipstick, things of that nature. Or, you know, a secret closet with wigs, 'cause I could feel like a lot of girls wear obviously press-on nails, but a lot of like drag queens do too, or crossdressers.

She didn't say it was a fake nail, she said it was like a—

go?

As if someone broke their nail.

Hm. Long fake fingernail. Fake, like an acrylic press-on.

Do you have daughters? Like, that—

no, she said for a fact this could not have come from anyone that I know.

It could have been stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe when they came in the house. Like, yes, that's what I said.

It's not a smoking gun, but it's hella suspicious.

How on earth could a man have an affair in your marital bed when you have like two small children and you're pregnant. You're pregnant, aren't you in the bed all day?

You're getting like, like definitely stuck on the logistics, which I respect.

It's impossible to anybody be having an affair in your bed, logistically, because nobody can get in my bed if I never leave my bed, right?

That's the thing, ladies. If you want your man to stay loyal, never get out of bed.

Well, stay loyal inside the home.

Yeah. Um, So while— okay, so I agree with you that it's not 100%. This could be explained away in a million legitimate ways.

Stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe.

Okay, but like, why of all the places for this fingernail that was stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe could have ended up in the kitchen, the living room, the bathroom, the dining room, it's under her side of the bed? Don't you think that's weird? No, I think you're being delusional.

I know, I really don't. Like, I, I just— unless you tell me like you're in the military, and so you're out of the home for months at a time. Like, if you're home with two small children, there's no one having an affair in your bedroom.

Maybe she works and the kids are at daycare. There you go.

And so the husband comes home in the middle of the day with his—

maybe he recently got laid off, even though I do think she would have told us that.

Yeah, and she would say like, I'm— I just think it's, it's seriously impossible. I think it's seriously impossible.

I wouldn't like write it off 100%. I would definitely keep an eye on your husband.

Yes, of course. But don't assume the worst if this is all you have.

And you know what, I do feel like maybe you can and should like just do a very brief snoop in through his phone.

Fine, if that makes you feel better. Yeah, but like, I don't know, I think it could be so many things. Not impossible. I would say it's like 5% chance affair.

Oh, I would say actually 50% chance affair. Ooh, yeah, maybe someone kicked it through the window. Maybe like, maybe it was a part of a— got stuck to a UPS box. Like, maybe, maybe. So 50/50.

Also, let us know, or think to yourself, like, how often are you out of the home? Is it possible?

I need you to take a look at your own logistical, like, schedule.

And like, is it a possibility? Because I know, like, in my house that would be actually impossible. Don't you have like cameras or a Ring doorbell? Wouldn't you to see someone enter your home.

Yes, an in-home affair in the technological age is extremely difficult to pull off. That's— I, I agree, especially when you have babies. The Nanit, you could hear audio on the Nanit from 3 rooms down.

I'm telling you, it, it has to be like very, very difficult.

And when I'm watching the Nanit and me and Ben are in the living room and he coughs, I can hear the cough on the Nanit.

So just, you know your house, you know your schedule. Look inward. Also let us know, like, oh, you know, if there is room for possibility. I'd like to know more. I need more information here. Yeah, I agree.

Well, that's our show. I'm exhausted from helping our listeners. Like, same, it's exhausting just being so helpful. We do. Um, thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast of the Morning Show, where we do the fast 5 stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So watching us on YouTube, please help me to subscribe and give this video a thumbs We're also available as podcast. Anywhere podcasts can be found. So Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, public radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places where you listen to podcasts. Vanessa, Tosi, leave a 5-star review about our beautiful, stunning, and weekly talent that we are.

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