Transcript of David Samson Teaches You How Great Milwaukee Is | Hour 1

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There is nothing casual about football season. You can tell yourself you're just gonna watch one game, and 6 hours later, you're emotionally invested in a 4th quarter between 2 teams you don't even care about. That's what I love about this time of year. The entire weekend becomes football. You're texting friends, tracking games, second-guessing coaches, convincing yourself you saw something before everybody else did. And then Monday comes around and you get to do the whole thing again. Those are the weekends you remember. And for me, some of the best ones have usually involved some good people, a great game, and a cold Miller Lite. No matter what triumphs are in store this season, legendary game days start with Miller Lite. Cold, crisp, refreshing, that clean finish. And it's part of plenty of memorable football weekends. Make game day legendary. Go to millerlite.com/dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Game time is Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. You're listening to the Dan Le Batard Show in partnership with the DraftKings Sports app.

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David Sampson is a part of the Le Batard and Friends network. It is burgeoning, it is exploding, it is Pulitzer Prize-winning. It deserves the respect of the Miami Heat when Jeremy Tesche goes to the Heat games. And Pablo Torre, as you know, is killing it. I've told you guys before that David Letterman is a real hero of mine on just doing things differently. And so this is, uh, great praise coming from David Letterman that he even knows who Pablo Torre is.

Are you familiar with something called the Pablo Torre, uh, Where's Pablo podcast?

Yeah, uh, I know Pablo Torre from Mondays on Morning Joe. Have you ever seen him on—

I've never seen him on the Morning Joe.

It's really good.

Pablo Torre has this podcast, Where's Pablo? Where's Pablo podcast?

Good enough. I will take it.

Checks out.

We are a legitimate media company, Miami Heat. Where's Pablo? Yeah, that's right. It's a better name. It is a better name. Well, let's play it again. I think the first wordy one is the best name. We should change the name of the podcast to what he says at the beginning.

Are you familiar with something called the Pablo Torre Where's Pablo podcast?

I know Pablo Torre from Mondays on Morning Joe.

Have you ever seen him on—

I've never seen him on the Morning Joe.

Pablo Torre has this podcast, Where's Pablo? Where's Pablo Podcast? Where's Pablo Podcast?

Well, Zazz, hold on a second before you start laughing too much, okay? You said you wanted to simply power through what happened the last hour with your voice.

Yeah, I made a bubble.

There was a sound I've never heard emerge from a human body, and I'm not the one to talk right now given that I'm making truffle sounds because of the amount of, uh, coffee I'm drinking. I will tell you that, uh, AI will replace us one day, but at the moment what's happening is that some of the parts on the vehicle are breaking. And so my voice doing things that I've never heard before— Zaslav doing this sound. You tell me if you've ever heard this.

Butler walked—

oh, something pop.

You guys, there's a pop in the middle of that.

Play it again.

That's, that's, that's my new way of communicating.

Bobby McFerrin's Don't Worry, Be Happy.

That's how I communicate sometimes, and if you can't understand it, that's on you.

We put that in there.

We had to put that in there.

No, you did that to me with the truffle sound. This is authentic. We lowered that one.

Here's a little song I wrote.

That's, that's a whole language right there.

That sounds— both those sounds sound like that movie. What's that movie called? Was it District 19 where the aliens that were the star of the movie didn't speak any normal language?

It's called Where's District 9?

Where's Pablo's District 9?

Yeah, I can replicate that.

David Sampson is with us. Nothing Personal is the name of his podcast. David, I don't know where to start with you because there are a number of things that are interesting in sports business. But let's start here. Okay. The Dolphins, 0-5. They've yet to have a lead in any game this year. They announced that they are raising all season ticket prices for next year. They've averaged 58,000 people per game. They're 31st in the league. They're only ahead of the Jags. Your thoughts on them raising ticket prices right now?

I would have waited till I had the lead in the first game and then sent the email because they've already gone through. You're sending out renewals to current season ticket holders. I would have tried to increase individual ticket prices first. I would have tried to increase enough of the most expensive seats, but make it from a mathematical standpoint that I could announce a 0% increase because I lower some of the upper bowl seats. I would have done some magic math to not get this PR. It's just not worth it at the moment because you open yourself up to all sorts of noises from local, incredibly important media companies.

It's tricky, though, right, David? Because I saw yesterday people all over social media were complaining that at 0-5, they got their Dolphins season ticket renewal package came in the mail yesterday. And, and they're even raising some ticket prices because there's gonna be an extra home game next year. Like, what are you supposed to do?

The Dolphins got booed at AEW. Yeah, the Dolphins got booed last night. Like, during the break, the ring announcer was like, do we have any Dolphin fans in the house? Loudest boos of the night.

Yeah, like, what are they supposed to do there, David?

Well, the timing is the timing. But I agree that there is some flexibility. But the problem is they're going to lose 17 games. So what are you going to wait for? 0-9? Do you want to wait for 0-10? Do you want to never send out your renewals? You're going to have some bad years, but the Dolphins have just had some bad decades. And I would just keep them as flat as possible and go for a major increase the minute you win a playoff game, depending on what your horizon is to own the team. And what Steve Ross has done is he's cashed in part of his equity in order to gain liquidity. He's gotten a few minority partners to come in at really high valuations for not just the Dolphins, but also F1 Miami Open, for Dolphins, for Hard Rock Stadium, the assets that he owns. So he has cash and he's using that to pay down debt, of which he has. But you could use some of that to maybe, maybe from a PR standpoint, delay a price increase for as long as possible. That's what I would try to do.

You just said flatly that the Dolphins are going 0-17. You're putting your name on that.

I—

find me a game that they'll win. I was looking at the schedule wondering, because the cups of coffee that Larry Zonka has— it's not a cup of coffee. It's maybe a shot of something. When the last undefeated team loses, the undefeated Dolphins get together and—

It's just champagne.

Oh, it's champagne. So the—

oh, what kind of celebration is that with a couple of cups of coffee? Like, what do you know?

They're older. It could be Mueslix. It could be like—

Do you not know? Do you not know how human beings celebrate things that they enjoy? Like, what? How is it possible that you made it cups of coffee instead of just champagne?

I don't think you need champagne. Champagne is not what makes it a celebration. It's actually having something to celebrate.

But it's not coffee.

Celebrate with nothing. But nobody celebrates with ChapStick. What's the difference?

Okay, so you think the 1972 Miami Dolphins who were perfect celebrate every year with coffee?

I thought that that would make sense as they get together at Bo Camper's and like have a cup of coffee and celebrate it. I didn't recall that it's— they pop champagne, but whatever. Not the point. There's 0-17 is the celebration. What's the popping situation when you don't win a game? And I couldn't find one game they win. Are you guys—

are you guys hearing anyone saying this who understands that football has stuff in it, that football— footballs, and they're not going to go all season without having a lead?

They're playing the Chargers in Week 16.

Like, I— but I'm just saying, I don't hear a whole lot of people just saying flatly they're going 0-17. Like, it— they're, they're bad, but football makes everything so that any Sunday, any team— I mean, the Titans won last week.

This is a big one though, off a bye against the Jets. Gotta have this one.

Oh, MetLife takeover.

You're putting your name on 0-17. You're saying it flatly.

They're not looking at that schedule. Like you, Dan, find me one winnable game. Now, the Chargers, they'll be rid of McDaniel by Week 16. So I think the Chargers will have a far better chance to win in Week 16 than they would have today. It would be way better if they were playing the Chargers like right now. That would be ideal.

Where's Pablo?

What are you most excited about if you can only pick one thing about this World Series?

To teach people about how great Milwaukee is.

I'm scared of them as a lifelong Rays fan.

Well, you should be because they're a better team. But the Rays are fun. The Rays are good to watch. But everything you love about the Rays—

Yeah, they do.

The Brewers do better.

Yeah, they do. That's the problem I've noticed when I fear them. I'm saying to myself, I'm looking, I'm like, oh my God, they Ray better than the Rays in all the Ray ways.

And that's what it is. And that's what's hard to actually think about when you look at the series and try to handicap it. The team that better resembles themselves is the team that will win. While the Brewers were able to out-homer the Dodgers in the LCS, they still beat the Dodgers because they out-rayed the Dodgers. This World Series, either the Rays will out-ray the Brewers or the Brewers will out-Brewer the Rays, but that'll be the winner. And they're both amazing teams. I couldn't be more excited. Tomorrow at this time, the Game 1 pitching matchup, and it hasn't been announced yet. Have the Rays announced that they're going with Rasmussen?

Yes.

Or they—

no, I thought, I thought Rasmussen was starting because he's going to have enough rest and it's going to be tomorrow and he's going to be fresh. They should go with Rasmussen.

Like, it is insane. I read somewhere by somebody that it could be Nick Martinez, who I love, and that's a very great number 4 starter to have. But Rasmussen on regular rest, if he's not hurt, there is some people who would say don't waste your best against the other team's best, which is Mizrafsky. I'm of the opposite camp. When it's their best, you go at it with their— with your best, because if you can beat their best with your best, you then get the depth, which the Rays have better than the Brewers, and you'd get a huge advantage. So I hope they go with Rasmussen. But either way, Miz may throw a buck 6 out of the gate at 8:20 tomorrow night.

I think we're going to put on the poll, will the Brewers out-Brewer the Rays or will the Rays out-Ray the Brewers?

Thank you. Also put it on the poll, please, because Buck 6 out of the gate at 8:20. Just one word. Buck 6. Is, is Miz coming out of the gate buck 6 at 8:20?

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Going for 2 when you're up by 5. Switching the zone when man isn't working. Oh, and building your new stadium in the state your team actually plays in. It's sports! Some things just make sense. You know what else makes sense? Drinking Jägermeister shots ice cold. Drinking it any other way would be like punting on first down! Or letting your worst hitter bat first! Or like going for 2 when you're down 3 with a second to go! It wouldn't make any sense! So don't let the team down. When it comes to Jägermeister, drink it cold or don't drink it at all!

Jägermeister.

Damn, that's cold.

Drink responsibly.

Jägermeister liqueur, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mast-Jägermeister U.S., White Plains, New York.

Dan Levitar.

There's sunglasses in boxes today, but in my bed in the hospital, ending our lives all the same.

Jeremy Tatché.

It's the final nightgown.

This is the Dan Le Batard Show.

The Caminaro home run trot. I've been very frustrated by this. This happens throughout sports all the time where people who aren't paying attention in any way to the sport come over, wander over, grab the easiest thing, and then complain about it. So somehow the Rays beating the Guardians became a conversation about the length of Caminero's home run trot, which was annoying to me. Was it to you?

As team president, 38 seconds is too long, and I would have someone beaned after that. As a member of— host of Nothing Personal, member of the media, a fan, I thought it was awesome. So it depends what your perspective is.

Dan, he was literally El Caminero on that.

That is correct. He walked around the bases, and in Spanish, that's what that means.

The walker.

The walker. Somebody who walks. That's exactly what he did. David's Spanish is exemplary, as we all know. So you're separating team president and fan there. Why? You like entertainment. If your guy did that, you wouldn't want your guy doing that?

No, I want my guy to act like that it's an absolute fait accompli that he was going to do that and get around the bases, get in the dugout, next batter up, let's crush this team and move on to the next game. And if that were done to me, I would be making sure that we had the phone to the dugout, that we called and we were calculating who we were going to have hit who. And because we would always calculate who the pitcher was and who the hitter was who was going to be hit, but I would make sure that call got made that second. Wait a minute, before the— he was finished of the 38 seconds.

I have— okay, so I've got a couple of follow-up questions here. How many times did you make that phone call in your life?

In, in 18 seasons, at least once a season. So at least 18 times.

Who are you calling and what are you saying?

It's the GM. We're with the GM and we either walk down to the clubhouse and get the clubbie to go out to the dugout, or we find a way. It's mostly that. But there's a phone. There actually is a phone in the dugout that you can call. I wouldn't speak to the manager during the game, but we would if we wanted to take care of it that particular game. We'd have the conversation with the dugout during the game, but sometimes it'd be after the game. If it's game 1 of a series, let's say, then we would have it in the manager's office and we'd plan what the next day beanie would be.

An order or a request?

An order. It's on— what do you mean? What does that mean, a request? Like, oh, pretty please, sugar on top?

Did anyone reject it? Did Girardi do what you wanted him to do?

There was never a rejection because we were always on the same page when it came to that. If you're going to show up our team, And you're going to hit— if you get hit, one of our players, you're going to show up our team. If you're going to steal a base up 8, if you're going to take— if you're going to score on a sacrifice fly, that's sort of iffy in a blowout game in the 8th inning. There were like 10 things that were on the list that require a beating. Now, we're not La Russa. We did not go after people's heads. A beating means on the ass, or if you're good enough, in between the numbers. But I loved a little ass play right there. You can get the right pitcher to go 96 and it leaves a bruise you wouldn't even believe what it looks like.

First, I'm uncomfortable with a couple of things here, and least of them your language, okay? I'm uncomfortable with how comfortable you are just saying, hey, go hit that guy, as if it couldn't actually hurt somebody. But I don't think you're defining beaning correctly. I think beaning is always the head. It's not—

I don't think—

Then I would never do that. No, no, no. That's not how we would define it. Maybe you do, but no. When you bean a player, I would— you never go after a player's head, ever.

So put it on the poll. Put it on the poll at Le Batard Show. Is beaning hitting a player in the— a baseball player in the head? Because I've always thought that that's exclusively for the head, that when you're saying beaning, you're hitting them in the bean, you're hitting the plunk.

Yeah, I think you're right here, Dan. It says that it's specifically striking them such as to cause harm. So I think a plunk might be the ass play David was talking about.

You know, again, tomato, tomato, we would call it. We had a word for it. And the word was, hey, we're going to bean that guy. We're going to hit somebody. And we would choose who to hit. And no, never the head. Please do not misunderstand, ever. It's always the back of the jersey. Always. And we would also make sure that the player who we have doing it has command. We once had to— we once had a player get in trouble because the player missed the guy he was supposed to hit and literally missed him, like threw behind him, which is not what we had planned. We had planned to hit him. So it's not like we're asking one of the players who throws 100 without command to ever do one of the beans. We never would do that. Loved a little ass play.

David, the manager would never get offended with you telling them to do that. Not that they don't want to do it, but like, I know what to do. I don't need you telling me.

We were always on the same page with that. Of all the ways and all the managers who were fired with all the pages, we were not. When retaliation for things like that— I never remember a situation with any of the 49 managers saying, hey, this was worthy of retaliation, and the manager saying, oh no, that was a great play by the other team because we knew what we were doing. It's not that we would just willy-nilly say, let's throw at somebody. It's something had to have happened. You're spending 38 seconds pimping your home run. There's going to be throwing at a player, and that's just part of the game. I don't actually find that to be an issue at all.

David Sampson's Nothing Personal. I continue to tell you and will continue to tell you that what he is doing there goes deep, deep on sports business in a way that I have not seen before, heard before anywhere in the history of the coverage of sports, sports business. And so what I would like for you to do, because that has an audience and it finds you because they know that you know what you're talking about here, give me some of the things pay and labor related that are going to happen here after the World Series that are something that people are not hearing elsewhere and that you have not yet said on Nothing Personal about what's about to approach here after what is potentially a very fun World Series that nobody might watch because of the 2 teams involved.

I think people are very, very confused about what the reality of the situation is in baseball. And you've got owners coming out, including Hal Steinbrenner today, who met the media and talked about how he is completely in favor of every labor proposal of a salary cap. And you've got total unanimity amongst the owners. And I'm here to tell you that that unanimity is not going to last throughout the lockout. There is going to be owner v. owner issues that are going to have to be dealt with prior to negotiating a real collective bargaining agreement with the players, because what's going on now is not a negotiation. It is proposals that are being given but not being responded to. So that results in a lockout, that results in missed start of spring training. It results in missed games because when it comes time to actually get to negotiating the major issues in collective bargaining, You have to have 23 owners who are in support of what you are doing. And because of where baseball is, the Brewers, the Rays in the World Series is wholly irrelevant to the reality of where owners are. And where they are says that there will be a stoppage that is far longer and far more difficult to swallow than what people believe.

And I am sorry for that. But. We will get through it. There will be a World Series next year and you will forget about all of this. But it's going to be a major part of the sports business landscape for the next 6 months.

Baby, can you guys please get the Reaper? Summon the Reaper. David Sampson has not yet had to wear a costume this season. He has not yet lost at the bucket. And we need him to lose so that he has to do this segment wearing something ridiculous.

I will not lose.

I mean, that's an absurd thing to say.

We'll see about that.

Roy is selecting for him here. Let's see what it is that we have picked by Roy.

The Kansas City Chiefs. Damn it.

Sunday Night Football. Sunday Night Football at the, at the Super Bowl champs.

At Seattle. They're a 2.5-point underdog. They're 5-0. Seattle's 3-3. They are an underdog on the road.

I'm staying with the Chiefs.

Uh, okay.

Sam Darnold had his minute and, uh, he's at 14 and a half minutes and counting.

So that's it. David Samuels.

Can you have 15 minutes of fame if you're a Super Bowl-winning quarterback? I think that's more than 15 minutes.

Let's talk about the single quarterbacks who have won Super Bowls.

Well, Nick Foles had 15 minutes if you want to do that.

He really did.

Yeah, that's a good one.

But Sam Darnold started an entire season.

Grossman?

And he was good the year before for Minnesota.

You know what?

I'm making a ruling on this. That's more than 15 minutes for Sam Darnold.

What about Jeff Hostetler? Is that 15 minutes?

That's 15 minutes. That's in Nick Foles' class.

All right, this is—

Well, remember, he started an entire season.

Also, can you have 15 minutes of fame if you have a statue?

That's a good point.

Dilfer?

No. Jeff Hostetler has a statue.

What Nick Foles does—

I did not know that. I take it back. You— that is not 15 minutes. If Nick Foles— he has a statue outside the Linc.

Yeah. Philly special.

Oh my Lord. That is— that gives statues a bad name.

I don't want to hear women talking about the WNBA.

That was crazy, right, David?

I was listening to the Shadow Show and I am silly enough as I was— had just finished Nothing Personal, getting ready to go on your show. I thought that's That's what Bo Camper actually said. And so I was just wondering, like, that's just a weird thing for Chris to bring in as show prep. So I thought you were just gonna say, by the way, that doesn't add anything to our show. It didn't occur to me that Cody would've said it wrong.

You know what? I need to make a clarification on this, and I wanna play this game, okay? I want to play the Super Bowl winners who had 15 minutes of fame, because the quarterback, that's usually not the case. But you brought out the argument of a statue, And if I recall, that statue's not actually celebrating Nick Foles as much as it is Nick Foles and Doug Pederson and the two of them just representing, hey, we won the Super Bowl that year. And this isn't about Nick Foles. It's just to remind you there are two guys talking who represent that Super Bowl, and we're not giving Nick Foles his only statue or his own statue. We're going to make him have a statue with someone else, thus nullifying how significant that statue is.

It's a statue symbolizing the significance of the Philly Special. That's them calling the Philly Special.

But that's a statue for a play, not a player. That's— that is not— that is not Nick Foles has a statue as if he's remembered by that franchise as solely Nick Foles. He's remembered for a play called by a coach.

I think it counts.

I have now changed my mind again. Mike, you misled me. I thought it was like the D-Wade statue in front of AAA. That is more of an installation of a sculpture of a moment. And the people who are engaging with that sculpture likely have no idea who either of those 2 people are. So I'm still going back to Nick Foles was 15 minutes.

Nah.

So you minimize statues that celebrate moments as opposed to people?

When outside a ballpark? Yes. Now, in the middle of Central Park, I mean, at a museum? Hell yeah.

Okay.

But outside a stadium?

I was going to get on your ass for being un-American.

David, if I walk into a court of law and I argue that there's a statue of Nick Foles outside the stadium in Philadelphia, I'm going to win that case.

I can't imagine what the cause of action would be that you'd have to argue. Yes, it is true that Nick Foles is in a statue outside of the stadium, but that of course is not what we're talking about.

That's not true.

Nick Foles is not in a statue outside the stadium.

Stop being men and just admit there's a statue of Nick Foles and move on. No.

Yeah, okay.

We're just, we're just gonna be men.

I'm gonna be—

Just gonna be men.

Continuing to play the game.

This is why I don't want to hear boys talk about I'm going to—

have you noticed that men are dressing like sluts at the gym?

Wow.

I want to play the game of 15 minutes of fame because Roy whispered in my ear Earl Morrall is great for 15 minutes of fame, but he didn't play in that Super Bowl. He was the backup during the season, but he got them to 17-0, helped get them to 17-0, and then they brought in at the end— can you imagine this happening now, by the way? Right. I want you to imagine, like, the Giants making it all the way to the playoffs undefeated somehow from here, and then all of a sudden saying, never mind, Jackson Dart's coming now. J.J. McCarthy, get out of the way. Earl Morrall helped them get to undefeated, and then Bob Griese came in in the Super Bowl and threw 7 passes.

That pretty much happened with Peyton Manning and Brock Osweiler with the Broncos.

But that's not—

Nick Foles, Carson Wentz.

But that's not 15 minutes of fame at the quarterback position when you've won the Super Bowl. The discussion was, is Sam Darnold at 15 minutes of fame? He's too good to be at 15 minutes of fame.

It's like Belichick. deciding, all right, we're gonna roll with Bledsoe again.

Who else? Because I'm not sure Hostetler goes in this category either because he did play the whole season, didn't he? Didn't he?

That season? No. I mean, he became the Raiders starter afterward, but I, I don't think he played the whole season.

He came in for an injured, uh, Simpson.

Yeah.

What about Scott Mitchell?

What about Doug Williams? Very famous. Love him as a quarterback.

No, but he was the starter all season. No, he was the starter all season. And he gets—

No, no, that's not the category.

He gets more fame than that for being Black.

Uh, I don't know about that one.

I've ruled it.

I'm with Roy on this one.

I've ruled it down.

Levitar.

Jessica thinks you're pathetic. I saw the look on her face. It can never be the lane to victory, Matt. No, I think Jeremy's pathetic.

Jeremy just—

You should hear him back here.

He's so sad. Delivered the most absurd theater kid basketball analysis line that I've ever heard from him.

Jeremy Tatche.

My dad was talking about the adjustments that Spo made and criticizing him last night, and Jeremy just back here.

His adjustments were spectacular.

It's just like they lost.

They're down 0-2.

This is the Dan Le Batard Show.

Tim Tebow, the NFL player. 15 minutes?

Tim Tebow, I gave you guys this stat the other day. No, Tim Tebow doesn't get 15 minutes because the stat the other day that Deshaun Watson Deshaun Watson was very close to becoming the first player since Tim Tebow to have 4 consecutive game-winning drives 4 weeks in a row. Tim Tebow is way too famous for 15 Minutes of Fame.

But the pro player, he barely played in the NFL. He just had his moment where he had those 4 straight games.

We had that one picture at Jets training camp or Patriots training camp in the rain where he had no shirt on. He was jacked and walking to the sidelines.

Jacked to the gills.

Yeah, that was a good picture for him.

But he's not a Super Bowl winner, and you guys are now playing a different game.

What game are we playing?

We're playing 15 Minutes of Fame: Can a Super Bowl-winning quarterback ever be 15 minutes of fame because David Sampson is, is dismissing Sam Darnold's last season as if it didn't happen.

Dismissing? So I want to be— I want to clear up something here. What I'm telling you is I'm keeping the Chiefs in the grid of bucket death because grid of— in the bucket of—

You got it.

The bucket. The bucket.

In the bucket. I'm keeping the Chiefs in the grid because they're going to win as 2.5-point underdogs. They're going to win the game because the Seahawks are getting credited still as though they are the defending Super Bowl champs and they are as good as they were last year, which they're not.

They are the— they are the defending Super Bowl champs.

They're the reigning Super Bowl champs, but they are clearly not going to have that level of— they're Russell Wilson Seahawks, basically. It was great. And that's that.

What do you mean? What do you mean? Those Seahawks were great for many years.

The Seahawks are fine. They may make the playoffs, but the Chiefs are going to win this week. Why can't you just leave it alone that Nick Foles and Sam Darnold are not famous? They won a Super Bowl. It's great. I'm really happy they did. But it doesn't mean they're Joe Theismann or Joe Montana. It just doesn't. Or Tom Brady or Aaron Rodgers. It's a different conversation.

Teams going back to their original starter after their original starter missed extended periods of time while the backup excelled. It's usually reserved for either MVPs or Hall of Famers. Steve McNair happened. You were right about Peyton Manning and Brock Osweiler. Drew Brees went out. Teddy Bridgewater went in 5-0. Drew Brees returns for the playoffs and they lose.

Was Joe Theismann appreciably better than Doug Williams in this category? He just threw Joe Theismann in a Joe Montana conversation. What's the difference between Joe Theismann and Doug Williams? They both won once, right?

Like, what do you have to say about Joe Theismann? What's the difference between Joe Theismann and Doug Williams?

Oh yeah, Doug Williams.

But you're— he just put Joe Theismann in the Joe Montana conversation and then said that Doug Williams is somebody who classifies as 15 minutes of fame. And I don't think that Joe Theismann as a quarterback, or famous as it related to when he was playing, was appreciably better than Doug Williams. Do I have this wrong? Is my, is my memory faulty here on what those quarterbacks were? Or is David's memory faulty on how good Joe Theismann was and how many championships Joe Theismann won? Joe Montana category is crazy. What's the movie you're reviewing for us this week, David?

Notre Dame guys, please tell me that somebody in your group saw the documentary about Norm MacDonald, and I know you must have, Dan. It's called Norm: The Tale of Norm MacDonald, directed by Judd Apatow. I had no idea. I would say, which is shocking, 85% of that documentary was stuff that I didn't know about Norm MacDonald. I had some sort of memory of a, of a sickness. I had some sort of memory of how it ended with Saturday Night Live, like somewhere back in the annals of my fried brain. But this documentary, as done through clips, as done through Norm himself, the life that he lived, which was cut way too short, having died only at 61 years old. And that's not a spoiler alert.

What?

Getting Don Ohlmeyer to talk on camera before he passed away. understanding the history there and the brilliance that is Norm Macdonald. I didn't understand when a preview came out for this why there was going to be a documentary about Norm Macdonald. I had not gone into the YouTube rabbit hole. I had not looked at all the times on Letterman speaking of Pablo— Where's Pablo? And this documentary is crisp, even though it is a full-length documentary at about 126 minutes. There's not one minute where you look at your phone or think about the time. You realize that you are watching a movie about a great individual who we lost way too soon, who was brilliant. I strongly suggest that everybody watches this.

I also suggest that people check out the Judd Apatow South Beach Session. I really enjoyed doing it with him, and I really like the pivot in his career where he is celebrating some people who were great at comedy in documentary form. The best one he's done so far is The Diaries of Garry Shandling, but this one is great. for a lot of different reasons, including I think, David, that many people will experience this documentary the way they have previously experienced Norm Macdonald, that many of the people know him through the clips, because once you get into the algorithm, you can't stop looking for more of the places where he was better at comedy than other people were at comedy. So I too would recommend that documentary. None of you have seen it here? None of you? I also recommend—

Too busy watching movies about guys trying to escape whales' buttholes. You should prioritize that. That's a wild one.

Uh, so you pay for the entire seat, but you'll only need the edge of it?

Yeah, that's a great tagline. I was, I was absolutely on the edge of my seat the entire time. I'm still thinking about this movie. It's, it's ridiculous. He gets swallowed by a whale, and, you know, but inside the whale things happen, you know. He got— there, there's several— I mean, he's getting attacked by a squid in the whale.

How much could be going on inside a whale?

Oh, you, you're about to find out.

There are a ton of things to do.

And you would think You think it's pitch black inside the whale. No, bioluminescence.

Convenient, so that they can film in there?

That's right.

Acting like there are a ton of activities inside that whale.

There are so many things happening inside this whale, and they try to scientifically make this plausible when it doesn't seem plausible at all.

David, good talking to you. Thank you for the time. Nothing Personal is— it's just really strong. I continue to say it, and it's not false praise. I just love the lane that David has chosen. People are starved for the kind of inside information that he's giving them on sports finance. And it's just consistently has a whole bunch of stuff in it that you're just not going to hear anywhere else. He asked the group if you had any interest in Norm MacDonald. Can I interest the group in Michael Wilbon as PTI this week celebrates its 25th anniversary? These guys are old. We are not going to have them around here forever. Although I do not believe that— wait a minute.

You're always killing folks, dude.

What'd you say?

Late in life— Stop doing that.

Yeah.

Late in their careers. They've been on television for 25 years, and it is really rare to have a show last this long, to have chemistry so strong that television's egos and vanities don't destroy what you're doing. There have not been a lot of shows in the history of television like this one that celebrate a friendship for 25 years. But when I say they're old, Here's an example of Mike Wilbon being old.

I don't know that he has that.

Time to play a new game.

It's sweeping the nation.

It's called Guess What Michael Wilbon's Response Will Be to This?

What'd he say?

Shocking opinions. Unexpected Answer.

You know about those answers.

Shocking revelation.

You know about those revelations.

I can't believe he said that.

What'd he say?

I don't know that he has it. I'm not gonna—

Nat, off my screen.

I don't know that he—

well, it's not on my screen.

That's an arrow. See how old and stupid I am?

So you thought it was a gnat and it's the cursor?

It's an arrow.

It's a damn cursor.

So old.

So now you see why I say those guys are old. Now, I didn't mean to kill them.

He's so old.

But he was swatting at a gnat on his computer and it was the cursor.

Gnats are smaller than cursors too.

Yeah.

Also on this episode, he's quite the cursor. He really lets it fly.

Really?

Yeah.

I don't know that a lot of people have heard the back, uh, the behind-the-scenes Mike Wilbon, who is really foul-mouthed and always yells things at Tony Kornheiser. He's as foul-mouthed a person as I've ever known. Jason Jackson is close.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jason Jackson feels nasty.

He is nasty.

He is.

Oh, in private he's nasty.

Oh my God.

Oh yeah. Jeremy, what are you doing?

The things, the things that I've heard Jason Jackson and Steve Shapiro say to each other, you would not believe.

Yes.

Yeah, I can.

Foul.

I'm gonna listen. I'm gonna listen to this interview. Was Michael Wilbon agitated?

Yeah.

Huh.

Crotchety. I asked Matt Kelleher, his producer, can we get him to turn down the crotchety? The answer was Absolutely not. We're going to turn it up, turn it up, turn up the crotchety. There's an ad on my computer.

Your boy, Crotchety Jericho.

But it's good, it's good getting his expertise. And one final bit of promotion since I'm just doing old— Patti Smith on this week's South Beach session. No way!

That's a great get.

Look at Tony. Oh, he did You don't know Patti Smith?

No, you're not gonna help.

Oh no, no, Tony, no!

I, I would not ever expect Tony to know who Patti Smith is.

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