Transcript of Top 5 Teams JuJu Hates Without Giving A Damn | Postgame Show New

Against the Spread is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours. Tony, what you got?

I'm going to the association tomorrow night, the Spurs versus the New York Knicks in the Game 1 of the NBA Finals. Uh, Spurs are -4.5, that's their price. I'm gonna take them. I think they're gonna blitz the, uh, the New York Knicks early. I think I think they're going to win by more than 4.5, unfortunately. So I'm going to take the Spurs and the Galactic Fascism of Wemby.

Does like to spread his big man spread.

Mike, Mike also had the Spurs. We probably should have compared notes. But when I do take the Spurs, for all the very same reasons, I'm gonna head over to the new DraftKings Sports app and I'm gonna go ahead and pick the Spurs and I'm gonna get my rewards.

That's okay, we're not live, we could just stop down, right? We're not live. Of course we are. Okay, good. Okay, did think I said that one out loud.

Too smart He likes manspread.

Yeah, that's a terrible— that's a terrible—

Yeah, I just say it out loud.

You call it. I had just shaken that image. I had just shaken that image.

And it looks like Sid Rosenberg.

Okay, we'll get back to Sid Rosenberg. I don't know why you did that either, but I want to tell people that Metal Ark Media has never had something quite like what Juju and Trist are doing after NBA games. And so we are proud to present what he's doing at DLS Hoops on YouTube. He's going to be covering the NBA Finals for us, and it seems like it's going to be a giant one. Like, it seems like it's going to be a lot of fun. Juju, without knowing who it is and what it is that you have planned, uh, what are you doing to escalate the stakes on, uh, on Aliyub?

Oh man, we having some of the, some of the favorite guests of the Levitar Show on over here with you, with your boy. You know, we got the kid Merrill, we, we trying to get Sam Merrill, we trying to get some of these pretty much flammable people that we be having on the show to bring some of that to the Aliyub afterwards.

You did, uh, it'll be after games, how far after games, just so that people know where it is to find you, Juju?

As soon as Tony can get his behind to that computer, we are going live, baby.

All right.

So that's me. You didn't— you didn't promote me at all. That's going to be in all these postgame shows. I talk about Juju and Tristan. You never talk about me.

Okay. It's okay. It's everybody's project. I said it was unlike anything in the history of Metal Ark Media. It's a team game. It's okay. It's all right. You want your shine? Okay.

No, not really.

I don't want to. No, it's time. You don't want it now? I don't want it now. When you have to take 4 and a half. Not when you have to beg for it. Well, you did so well comparing notes with Mike on the segment.

To be fair, I had my notes first. He said his notes.

When you take the Spurs minus 4.5, make sure you do so on the new DraftKings Sports app.

Yeah, that we both know.

The only part that matters. Juju, do you have any thoughts on Sid Rosenberg?

Bruh, when I first saw him, I was like, I know they going to say who I think they going to say, but they didn't say it. Bruh, I'd like to introduce you to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory's Violet Beauregard. Oh, remember, she was a hater. She would hate on my boy Charlie, then she turned up behind right into the blueberry. Karma is a B-I-T. You already know the last two.

Uh, all right, there. Yes, we do. Thank you. We already do know the last two. It's very— you could have done— we know the last— you could have done B-I and it would have been three. Uh, there it is on the screen. That is fully purple. Uh, you guys have no more answers though on what Mike be happening there? Because I really do feel— okay, haha, we all talked about it. Also, it's skin color unlike any I've ever seen on a human being. What's happening there? No answers, just we're going to throw our heads back laughing. Like, when he looks in the mirror, he gets up in the morning, he's like, oh my God, I'm purple, what happened here?

He's cornered the market.

But what does— look, does anyone have a better theory than the hatred is eating him up from the inside?

He's molting.

Lighting, perhaps?

No, no, I mean the heat lamp that is hovering over his bed at all times.

Okay, you think he's gone— you think this is a bad sun tanning accident, that he fell asleep in a tanning machine?

I mean, Sid is— Sid famously throughout his entire career reveals how much he loves to tan. In fact, there was like a Person on the Street famous New York series, and this person just happened to come across Sid Rosenberg in the streets of New York, not knowing who it was, and he was shirtless tanning on a park bench.

You guys believe—

He acted like a real creep in that. Maybe colloidal silver?

You guys believe that that is not a tanning accident, that's a tanning on purpose?

Yeah! With Sid Rosenberg, yeah, you don't get to look that way on accident, dude.

It's absolutely Purposeful.

Impossible. Just can't be.

No, that's after the Joker fell in.

That's his thing. That's been his brand.

What do you mean? What's his brand?

Push tanning to the limit.

I'm gonna—

but that's more like a Stacey Adams, like, like brown leather. His is a purple leather Stacey Adams.

That's a totally different brand. The brand must be bronze. It can't be purple. If you're trying to make it your brand, you cannot look cooked.

He looks like an eggplant.

Hello. Hey, yo, no, it depends. Hello, uh, where are we on the catchphrases?

Phallic in nature.

Where are we on the amount of money owed? I wanted to get Bonetti on. Let's see what happens. We'll find out together what's going to happen. Uh, Juju, let's get into, uh, let's get into the Joker of the Day. What do we have? Do we have a Joker of the Day of the week?

Yes, sir, we got a joker. But I also like to submit this as the most difficult ones for a bulg or my boy to say. Hey hey, we're the monkeys, baby is very slippery. If they pull that one out, I think you might have to donate about 2 bands for that one. What you think, Roy? Oh, absolutely.

Yeah, you're gonna have to up that price, buddy.

Exactly. But joker of the day, man, my brother Skip Bailes. He says on Twitter, no surprise, Stephanie White reportedly out after repeated in-game clashes with Caitlin Clark. Wow. Not saying White was wrong, but you can't show up the face of the league on camera. Caitlin obviously wants a favorite of hers from Iowa, Jen Jensen, but no way Jensen can coach both. Caitlin said yesterday her and Stephanie White are closest ever. This is exactly wrong. Even Twitter came in to correct it. Back to you.

Well, I wanted to ask you, the targeting of Caitlin Clark on the court, is she less equipped for this than we thought she was? Because generally when you're face of the league type stuff, you're not a liability like that on defense where you're clearly being attacked. Like, that's not— face of the league doesn't— isn't allowed to be that.

I mean, it's allowed to be. It is just the fans of hers are— seem like they're here for the first time. Like, we can criticize sis. Like, she's a basketball player, she's a professional. The same way Jalen Brunson was targeted by the Hawks, the same way, uh, James Harden was targeted by the Knicks, they targeting her right now because she could use a little oil in her joints on defense. It's nothing big, nothing bad. It's just those clashes are just so vivid that you can see. And fans of hers are so loud on the internet that they don't realize, man, it's just It's just basketball.

Top 5 list, do we have one today?

Oh man, look, bro, I thought the NFL should have crispied this AJ Brown situation with all the news that was swirling and all these little insiders. So I was like, damn, as a Bills fan slash Eagles fan, this pisses me off more than anything. I haven't hated a team like this moving forward in a minute. AJ Brown, public enemy number one. So I got a top 5 teams that I hate. I don't give a damn. Oh well, I— the Oklahoma City Thunder. Unfortunately, it's been a bad couple months for them files.

How did that happen? That really happened to people, huh? Like, that— the style of play was so maddening that people turned on the champions. Simple as that.

It was just bad. It's hard to watch because they don't have to do it. It's like seeing Superman flop. It's like, bro, what are you doing? What are you doing, Homelander? Get your behind up and be tough. Next OLI, I have no rhyme or reason for this. The Washington Nationals. I don't know.

I don't care.

I love that. An irrational hate for the Nationals that he can't explain.

You don't even know. You know, can you name any Nationals?

Spaghetti W. I just don't like it.

I remember they had a Rendon situation and I washed my hands. That's it. Number 5.

On Rendon, they won the championship that year and they didn't have to pay him.

He doesn't have to explain his clearly irrational hatred for the Washington Nationals.

Right. Number 5. And seeing this number 5, I forgot we didn't mention a sendoff into the sun for Russell Wilson yesterday, joining CBS, calling, hanging up the cleats.

Oh, I didn't even know that had happened. I thought that was an interesting decision he had to make, though. Jets backup or CBS? Because everything's fine there. Yeah.

I mean, the beefcake Scott Pelley got after it. You see that? Yeah, of course.

Pelley threw down his barbells and said, who wants to challenge 60 Minutes? Pelley ripped off his dress shirt, his starched tie.

Oh my God. Number 5, the Wisconsin Badgers. Same deal. They're like, I don't know, all of them.

W. All of them. Yep.

All of them. The girls softball, the men's basketball. All of them. Speaking of Texas Tech softball right now is must-see appointment television, no matter who you are. You have to watch them. Every game is spectacular. Number 4, the Milwaukee Bucks. Get out of my face. Especially after this year with this whole Giannis situation. I don't like you ever since you had the big dog. Get out of my face. Number 3, Duke. Spelled D-O-O-K. Get him out of here. Number 2, after yesterday and AJ Brown, the New England Patriots. Oh no, I don't like it. Vrabel, I'm so sorry, you're a good guy probably, but unfortunately we had a bad introduction. And the last one, number 1 team no matter what, I don't care what happens to Earth, I still will hate them, the Utah Jazz. No matter what.

But why? Words. But why?

On principle?

Because it was on principle. And when I was a kid, there was thousands, seemed like hundreds of thousands of people in that arena that was mad at Michael Jordan. How can you cheer for John Stockton and not cheer for Michael Jordan? What's up with this lady in the front row? I don't like it. Get them out of here.

Oh, that was your introduction to how secular Utah can be.

Exactly. I was a young boy and I was like, uh-uh, I don't like it.

Also, the mailman had that thing.

Yeah, that was probably— well, there's that, but I don't think that's what Juju was talking about. Yes, there's mailman.

You can add it. Stockton had his thing.

And when Stockton— and Stockton later in life, also problematic.

We love Stockton. Not nearly as—

yeah, I mean, agreed. Uh, we'll get to the polls in a second, but before we do that, Juju, I wanted to, uh, interrupt your poll doing because— I'm sorry for the phrasing of that— uh, Tony had a story involving his pool guy. And I didn't want to leave today without getting to that story because I don't know what happened with the pool guy, but Cody, when I just generally say there's a story involving the pool guy, doesn't everyone's mind go to something nefarious or dangerous that the pool guy is trying to sniff around during the daytime around wives and others?

I don't know. I would think first that I caught him urinating in my pool. What? Yeah, that's where I go. So you just drop trowel and just let it hang?

Yeah, that's automatic fire, right?

Right.

Oh God.

Like you don't have to ask, what are you doing? Right. Because you gotta drain it at that point.

The pool?

You're about to kick him.

Ah, that's what the chlorine's for.

Exactly right.

That's right. We've all done it.

Yeah, we could, we continue to do it. All right. So here's this situation, boys. I need help.

That's exactly right.

I need help. My pool guy, great guy. Little sickly sometimes. He's a little sick, but not the point. The point is when he does show up, I go to greet him and the pool is very close to the, the sliding glass door. So he's out there doing his thing, whatever. So I always open the front door, and I've done— I've done this 3 times, and every single time the same thing happens. So I open the door, hey Carlos, what's up? It's kind of friendly wave, hey, thank you for coming over to my house, thank you for doing this thing. So he receives that, and I kid you not, guys, I swear to God, his reaction every single time is like this. He's doing the pool, right? He's cleaning. He gets frightened, but like so frightened.

Why are you scared?

Nothing to cough at. He is terrified. I don't know what happened. So I'm trying to figure out— I've done it at different pitches, I've done it at different tones, I've done it with waving a hand. I don't know what to do to make him not scared. So I want to ask the class here, is there anything that I can do to the pool guy to not make him terrified?

Is he like a war survivor? Does he have some sort of post-traumatic stress disorder, or is the cleaning of the pool a meditative zen experience for him?

Where it is, you, you probably have people for that, but I, I do really enjoy skimming a pool listening to songs about murder.

Yeah, the thing is, like, I get it one time.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know, he's right.

My headphones, just, I'm skimming the pool, someone's killing somebody in my headphones, that's alright, that's alright, this is great hip-hop, great era.

Yeah, the issue is, how do I not scare him every single time? So now the fourth time, if I do it and he gets scared, like, what do I do? Do I have to cancel?

You don't have to shout.

You have to stop doing it.

But I'm not shouting, I'm just saying, hey Carlos, what's up?

No, you have to just stop saying hello.

Karlhaus!

Stop saying hello? Yeah, stop saying hello.

Karlhaus!

Say goodbye! My dad had this thing too— he would fall asleep and I always have to wake him up, and I just like do it from behind the couch now because every time there's no good way to wake him up because it's always like "huuuhh!" Like, it's terrifying and it's prolonged. It's not just like "Huuah!" Like, it goes for 7 seconds where he's in his deep REM sleep and it's "Huuhh!!" Oh, oh, oh, and like, I, I can't do this anymore.

Dude, I swear to God, Carlos does it for like 3 seconds. I think he's gonna fall in the pool or fall back, and then all of a sudden he like, you know, breaks his leg and it's my fault because I scared him.

Like, Dad was there till like 3:15 after he was watching Juliette. He's like, why'd you let me sleep?

Because I'm not—

I'm flatly no longer waking you up. It terrifies me. Hold up a sign.

Oh, hi Carlos. Yeah, thank you for your service.

Yeah. Roy, do you have a pool? No, sir.

Are we the only two without a pool?

Most likely, yeah.

I don't have a pool.

The construction company is actively working on it.

Wow.

Yet.

I was gonna say, two Americas.

Three Americas.

Juju, do you have some poll questions for us to update, please?

Yes, sir, man. Do you know what a cuck is? 91% of the audience says yes, they do.

Can we go back here for just a second real quick? I felt like the questions Cody was asking made it seem like he was disguising that he didn't know what we were talking about. Was I the only one who thought that? He—

I think he knows what a cuck is, but he doesn't understand the significance of people sending me the chairs.

But when we explained to him that you're being accused of being a cuck.

Yeah.

You're— and why that's shameful.

Right. I think he knows that.

I don't think he understands the chairs. I don't think he does. I don't— the part I'm alleging is that because he doesn't know. It seems easy to understand why it is that that would be something if you understand what a cuck is. We could ask him. Yeah, but he keeps lying about it.

I'm not lying.

I'm not going to take a quiz.

Exactly.

Well put.

Maybe he does know what a cuck is, but he doesn't know the process and procedure of being— Yeah, do you know what a cuck chair is?

Uh, I've never heard the phrase.

All right, so cuck chair is where Zazz would sit. No, he watches someone have sex with his wife. Okay. That's a specific chair? Yeah, yeah. Often, like, if you go to a hotel and you see, like, a chair in the corner, that is commonly referred to as the cuck chair. Why is this chair just here, like, sat in front of a bed? What is this person watching? Clearly their significant other having sex with someone else.

Clearly.

Okay.

So the cuck command center.

Yeah, it was like a desk and a chair behind it, and it was facing the bed. That's the cuck command center apparently. And do you prefer a chair? Yo, don't address me as if it's something I do, all right?

Oh, oh, what's another poll question?

Just watch or you get after it a little bit.

All right, is it in secakus? Uh, is LeBron the modern-day Muhammad Ali?

Oh dear God, that's not going to go well for him.

77% of the audience says no, he is not. Close. Are people in New York being nicer to one another because of the Knicks? 83% of the audience says yes, they are. More impactful trade: AJ Brown to the Patriots, Miles Garrett to the Rams? 91% of the audience says Miles Garrett to the Rams.

It was weird, right? It was weird, right? The coverage, it was weird, right? You guys are with me on that.

Very weird.

It was weird, right? AJ Brown, AJ Brown, AJ Brown. Hey, a Giants superstar was traded bigger than AJ Brown. Okay, good.

Right. Not to be mentioned, OBJ back with the Giants as well as JuJu Smith-Schuster and Braxton Berrios.

It's like, let's sign every wide receiver to make sure that that's the story that comes up when they Google New York Giants this week.

It was weird, right?

The most important poll of all time. Is Dan running a construction company? 83% of the audience says yes, you are. And those are your polls.

I wanted to ask you guys if any of you had the reaction that I did to Jackson Dart trying to handle that moment. I mean, moment, you just— a little unpleasantness. Did it not seem to you that was a boy in a man's body trying to do man things that hasn't considered anything because he's actually a boy?

Yes. And that's all we wanted.

Thank you, Jackson.

Greg, you see the command center. You can monitor the situation while also maybe taking a call, maybe write some notes down.

I'm not joking when I say I want tomorrow a chair there and I want Zazz to be doing the show from behind us, watching Greg and I do the show. Who won?

You all did.