Transcript of #631 - Free Magic

Good day, good week, holiday, Christmas. Merry Christmas to everyone who is alive, I guess, at a good start because yeah. And ghosts, I guess, if there's some ghost. Ghosts, I guess, do they celebrate things like that? I guess they do. I wonder if it's fun celebrating something if you're a ghost or not. I wonder if you have a lot of friends if you're a ghost. Because a lot of times people see one ghost. They'll be like, Oh, we caught... Somebody saw this ghost or whatever. He was hiding behind a tree or something. He was just being scared. Just doing vowels or whatever. Just, Oh. But they never like, Oh, yeah, we saw some ghosts, some dope-ass ghosts that were just fucking bawling, that were hooping or something. Or just like, yeah, we saw some ghosts. They were vaping and laughing together and maybe splitting a brownie or something or just doing something fun. I don't know. I never really thought about that. Anyway, it doesn't matter. All that matters is the spirit, the spirit of Christmas. That's what's going on right now. It's that time you hear the music. That's what gets me into it.

They say it's Christmas. They say it's Christmas. Now, a lot of the radio channels now, it's like very Latino. It's like They said the Newborn King. Then you'll have one. They said the Newborn King. That's what's up, bro. Last night, we let the liquor talk. But yeah, I love the Christmas, the energy. That's what I got to embrace. See somebody and you just give them a little hug, or if they don't like you to hug them, I'll do this sometimes. I still take two hands, tap them on the shoulder like that. Give them that little Penguin hug, that little perverted butterfly hug, just But just let them... Some people don't like a damn hug. Some people don't like a hug, and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I'm a cactus. Don't touch me. But sometimes I just want a hug. I won't ask for a hug, though. That's who I am. I ain't no hoe. You You feel me? Sorry. I know Santa gets offended if you say, I ain't no ho, because that's his thing. But I won't ask for a hug. I'll stand by you and look like I need a hug or just do some shit like this.

What's up? But I won't be the one to ask for a hug. But I'll need a hug, but I I won't ask for a hug. Now, I'll stand by you like, I'll loiter. I'll loiter right around your arms and chest, but I won't ask for that hug. But I need it. But I won't ask for it. That's who I am. Let's listen to a little music to get us in the spirit, and then we're just going to get into some calls from you guys. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for just letting us be together right now. It's really nice. Here we go right here. This is some sounds we like to check out every year. This is Christmas Miracle by One Man Quartet. That's nice. What's happening, Holmes? This is like nighttime. There's a candle, maybe. This is Santa. We're waiting for Santa. Everything's out and the kids are asleep. This is just the ambiance. It's in the energy downstairs. If you sneak downstairs and look at the tree. That was the most fun. That was the most fun as a kid was sneaking down there and look, you'd be like, Oh, is he here yet?

You knew he wasn't there. It was just like 10: 30 at night, the Christmas Eve. You'd go down there. My siblings would all... We had to come down the stairs and then go around the edge of the wall, and then you could see the living room and stuff. There was still a little dinner table, but then you could see the the living room. Yeah, it was just like, Is he here? Did he come? We would all bottleneck at the bottom of the stairs in our pajamas and shit. We would be like, No, you're not going. You're not going. Our sisters, they were little, so they were like, Fuck. They didn't have any rights or whatever at the time because they were women also. We had to, You're not going. We'll tell you what we see. They're like, Tell Tell us what you see. Then we'd sneak around. Then once we got around, my brother was older than me, so then he took jurisdiction. But he also had bad eyesight. He was born, I think he didn't know. His levels and his eyes were off. He didn't have enough water in his eyes or something. So he'd have to splash water in his fucking eyes every 40 minutes.

So he could even get a gander at anything. Shit, I remember at his birthday, he'd miss the candles if he didn't rub a little bit of water in his eyes just to… Sometimes if you heat up some leftovers, I'll drip a little water on them. That's how it says me. I'll crack open a leftover. If it's in a container, I pour about an 11th of a cup of water on that, whatever. I don't care what it is. Lasagna, a piece of bread, whatever, fascia, whatever's going on. Hint of spice, hint of tomato. I'll just drip that bitch and then put it in the micro and bam. But that was like my brother. If mom didn't spray a little bit of water in his eyes right before he blew out the candles on his birthday cake, he'd miss that bitch. He'd just be spraying a He'd just be spraying a cold right out of another distance, miss the whole cake. But anyway, so at that point, my brother would be like, and once we turned the corner of the stairs, it was me and him. So my sisters were at the back, and they didn't know shit.

They only knew what we told them, and we lied to them because we were family. We would go and have to get closer to the tree and sneak up. My mom's bedroom was right off of the living room. We had to be quiet. The carpet was wet because our apartment was sinking a little bit by the kitchen area. You fucking, bro, your knees would start getting all wet. But it helped my brother because he could just put into the carpet and then rub them into his eyes and activate those bitches. We would get close to him and be like, Is he here? Is he here? Then we would just see. We would see the tree and the lights, and it would just look like it had during the daytime a little bit. Definitely more mysterious and night timey and the stockings. It was all just magical. It was just a thing of possibility. What were we going to get? What was going to happen tomorrow? Everything was going to be great. Something new was coming. It was just... I don't know. There was something It was just something just so magical about that scenario. I remember we had the colored lights on the Christmas tree, and I didn't really like them.

They looked a little cheesy, I thought sometimes. But at this time at night, it just looked nice. The stockings just hang in there. He'd be like, We'd have to just, A bowl, go back, go back. My brother would be like, Go back, you little f or whatever. I'm like, What? We get back to the stairs. My sisters would be like, What did you see? I'd be like, Fuck you. You don't know shit. Because, yeah, we just had this family we were. We But yeah, there was just something beautiful about it. But no, we'd be like, he's not here. Or sometimes we would do this. Yes, all the gifts are out there. He already came, but you guys have to go to bed. We would take this superior role with a lie. He'd be like, he already came, but you guys have to go to bed. Or maybe he's not coming. I don't know. We're wanting all bad this year. What have you guys been doing? Who's been showing their tits or whatever out on the street, right by the highway? Because we did live by a highway, right next to that bitch. If your hair was wet in the morning, you could put it right outside, like hanging out the window at the apartment.

In the morning, that was high traffic time. If enough semis went by, the wind would whip up and just dry your shit right in the a beautiful look. God, you'd look good. People were like, What do you have in your head? You're like, fucking 18 speed. I got a damn Mac. I got just a new off a Mac truck. But that was fun, man. That was a good time. That music reminds me of that a little bit. God, those memories were nice. Memories are so nice because it can really take you into a place. Oh, this is another song. This is Hip hop, Ready for Christmas. Let's listen to a little bit of this. Okay. Type shit. Christmas, Christmas, Christmas, Christmas. Okay, this one, Christmas is going to get a little bit black. You know what I'm saying? Santa pulling up. This is the look. Say if you're a white guy and you're in high school and you see your sister talking to, floating with a black guy and you're okay with it. This is the music that backs that up. Like, all right. Okay, Go ahead, Allison. She doing her shit. That's a Christmas beat right there.

I feel like that fits. If you see your sister floating with the Black guys at school and you're okay with it. That's that heartbeat right there, that black heartbeat. Dude, you ever heard a black heartbeat? That shit. It's different, bro. Go put your ear up to a black guy's chest, dude, which I know sounds very dangerous, right? Overall, it's... Yeah. Black guy, they're not going to welcome that. They're not going to do it. A lot of them turn into that guy. Who's that guy on that place for Golden State or whatever? That always beat people in the media acting like it was okay all the time? He would just punch white dudes? Draymon? Yes. That dude. Yeah, which shit seemed hella racial to me, but But yeah, that dude that was always... I think he did hit a mixed guy also. I'm just saying some guys, you could put your ear up to their chest. They might be okay with it. Some guys might get Draymon on you. But I think a black heartbeat is different. It shit got drums. It got probably some 808s, track beat. If you ever go to a doctor's office and he puts the stethoscope and he puts it up to a black guy's heart, he'll listen to us for 20 minutes.

There's different tracks. You'll have somebody feature on somebody's heartbeat. You're like, holy shit, this heartbeat, there's little dirks on it. There's a young boy and a Bayly Zimmerman. Like, what's going on? Damn, holy shit. What are you... You got some big X, the plug in you. There's that that happens where the white heartbeat is just like… But that black heartbeat, that shit's got cymbals. It's just got different... It's got different levels. They got a horn section. That shit's trapping, bro. That's what I'm saying, bro. This shit has a little bit of that black heartbeat vibe right here. You-y. You-y, see you. Say, yeah, you-y. There we go. A little bit more Christmas music right there getting into it. We did have some calls that came in. The hotline is always 985-664-9503. We had talked about some things. In the last episode, we'd spoken about people doing different challenges. There was a Movember where you grow out a mustache for epilepsy or whatever. I can't remember. Or there was sixth Shit, June or whatever. What was it? 16th Shit, June? Yeah. 16th Shit, June, where people were only doing 16 defecates in June for to support seizures or whatever.

I'm not even sure what it was. I think it was seizures. Let me see. Let me look that up. Sixteen, sorry. Sixteen. Shit. For Seizures. Yeah, for seizures. You had that. You had no nut, November. You had 40 fart, March. You had all these different things that people are trying to do to support, to raise causes. Remember a couple of years ago, they were dumping ice on people with down syndrome or whatever to help them out. Anyway, we had some calls in with people saying, Well, what were similar things like that that they'd had in their town? Is there another one that you remember, Trevin? I think it was actually 11th, shit, June, to get specific, so less than...

Anyways, talking about a call that came in that I remembered.

No. Was there any other ones that you remember that people do annually? Oh, Yeah, 2000, September. Oh, yes. People are only taking a certain amount of steps in a certain month. Oh, Sober October, that's another one. That's a big one. There's these things that start to happen. Then people called in with a few of their own, so let's hit them right here. Here we go. Hey, CEO. This is Sunny from Phoenix, Arizona. I just wanted to tell you that every- Sunny? It's Sunny in Phoenix. Come on, guy. You I'm homeless. Sorry. But that's a sound I would make if I were a cat, I'd be like, and then every now and then I'd be like, You're a f orget, or whatever. Anyway, let's hear more, brother. Thank you for calling.

Every year here in Phoenix, we do a little thing called No Bur October, is where you don't actually get cold all October long. It's actually not something that anyone is trying to It's just circumstantially so hot here in Phoenix that no one ever gets cold the entire month of October. You have to wear no shirt on Halloween. You got to wear a slutty costume on Halloween just to survive.

I don't know. It sounds like you're just trying to meet guys or whatever out there. But whatever, dude, I agree with you. It's a very sunburned area. I lived out there in Tucson for a little while. You'll get sunburned just looking at... You go outside and you're sunburned You don't know what to do. Dude, I would go to get the mail, and I wouldn't know how to get back home. I would be dehydrated. I'd have to have somebody from the cartel help me get back to my yard, hire a coyote to get me to. So, yeah, it's alarmingly hot out there. But you know it. That's the crazy thing. Sometimes people are like, Man, I can't believe it. It's so hot today. No, shit. It was hot yesterday. It was hot 700 days ago. It was hot 58 days ago. You just don't know patterns. That's the problem. You don't know how patterns work, dude. The deer, the reinders are coming. Dude, the first time you had a Mexican dude singing Christmas carols, early Mexican dudes that came to America, they didn't fucking know the words to them, bitches, homie. They did not know the words to the Christmas carols.

They were like, I'm dreaming above a Christmas for Whites and Others. We changed the lyrics to try to diversify the portfolio a bit. I respect it, but that's just wild. They'd be like, Aruro, pare nos rantes, ire meried, e Hey, baby. They were just fucking, Hey, what's up? Let me see that skirt, mommy. You're like, What the fuck? Anyway, let's hear another one that came in. Yeah, no bur. It's no bur out there. It ain't cold at all. Let's see what we got here. Another one came on.

What up, Theo? Jason here.

Good day, Jason, and happy Merry Christmas to you, brother. Onward.

You asked It's on episode 629 to give some recommendations for things like No Nut, November and such. One of the coolest ones that I started doing about five years ago was Every Day of May challenge. For Every Day of May, I do a certain amount of pushups. It started off with Every day of May, I'm going to do 100 pushups. Two years ago, my Every Day of May challenge was Every day of May, I'll do 500 pushups a day.

Every day of May, you're going to be up. Then you're going to be as up all the way up. What? That's amazing.

Omard? Every day of May, I'll do 500 pushups a day, every day of May. I think it's a really good thing to push on to people. I think it's a great way to kick off. It's like the middle of the year. We've all pissed off with our... We stopped doing our yearly, what are they call it, New Year's New Year's.

Yeah, you don't even know what it's called, dude. So obviously, you're not getting it done, and that's fine. Sorry. Go more Resolutions where I'm going to work out this year.

Everyone's stopped already. But let you know about that one since you did not call it out. Want to let you know that love you, Theo. All of us fans love you. You're the best.

Thank you, brother. I appreciate the nice words, man. Every day in May, that's a nice one because it takes on a challenge. There was this thing that was going around a while back. It was like '76 hard' or something. It was like you had to meet somebody that was in 1976 and show them your cock. You feel me? Anyway, yeah. But that's how you would hear it. That's an old trucker joke. But yeah, I like that every day in May. Because you're saying, Hey, I'm going to do something here. Because people have New Year's revolutions, and them bitches are horrible. My buddy was like, Yeah, he's like, I'm not going to stalk my ex, and I'm going to learn a new language. I'm like, Well, that's good. It's a lot It just could be a lot. Anyway, I don't know what I'm talking about. Who cares? It's the end of the year, dude. I used up all my good words throughout the year. I'm at the bottom of the bag, dude. I'm just down here shaking vowels around. You know what stopped me from investing in the past was just that I didn't know. I didn't know the value of putting away a little bit at a time.

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Hey, CEO, this is Charlie from Cincinnati.

Charlie from Cincinnati. Shout out Charlie, boy.

I just wanted to call in and comment on you talking about 2000, September. We We got, what do you say, 11 shit, June.

It's '16, but yes, onward.

Me and my family, a lot of times around the holidays, what we'll do, we'll do a, and maybe not me personally, but I know a lot of the ladies in my family, they like to do a 40 quief, quanza.

Forty quief quanza? Wow. I didn't even know it. Gazuntite. Yeah. Let me get your family a box of Kleenex, brother. Let's hear more, brother.

If you know what I'm saying. Let me know if you know anybody in your life that likes to do a 40 quief quanza.

Let me let you know. I don't know. You told us about it, so I don't even know about it. That's new to me, but that's a great one. That is a great one, man. That's tough, I think, to... I don't know how you exactly arrange that. Because I don't know if that's a seasonal thing. I don't know if that's definitely something that happens more in the spring to women because of pollen, if that's bigger, if that brings it on or whatever. All right, let's get another couple of calls here that came in.

I've been watching you for a while, and I really It really helps with the situations people go through, hearing them out, and it just makes everything easier. Right now, I'm going through a situation I didn't ever think I would be the one to be calling you, but things end up how they are. I just need some advice right now, and I don't know what to do. I've been with my girlfriend for four years.

Okay. Thank you, brother, for sharing that information. Let's hear more.

I'm 22 to start off. I'm She's 19. We started dating young about four years ago, and she really changed my life. And I wasn't on the right path. And she helped me out a lot. She got me through addiction. She got me through all of my problems in my life. And I left my house to be with her. I left my home, my family, when I was 18 years old. I wasn't living in an ideal spot. So I decided to leave and pursue a life with her. And it's We've been off and down over the years, but it just came to a point where I guess she got bored or tired or I don't know, because she just lost interest in me. We recently decided to split, not split, but just take a break. I left the apartment that we lived in for a little bit to go be with my family just for a month or two, just to take some time apart. I just received the text a week ago that she ended up getting pregnant by another guy. It just hurts. I just don't know what to do. I don't know who to tell.

I don't know.

Well, thanks for letting us know what's going on, brother. If you leave your apartment for a month or something and somebody and your ex or your girl gets pregnant, that's a tough thing. That's wild. If I'm real honest with you, when you talked about the build-up to you guys' relationship, you said that She helped you get through addiction. She helped you with this, and she helped solve all your problems, and you guys moved in together. It felt like to me that you were putting way too many... You was putting way too many candles on the altar of her for your well-being. She's the reason for all of these things as opposed to you're the reason for some of them. Or you guys, as I think, can be a catalyst for more positivity. But to put that much energy where it's like, She was the reason everything got better, and I left my family to be with her. That feels like it's a lot. It felt like a lot of pressure, which is okay, bro. I definitely... When I was in a relationship, it would be like this girl was almost like... It'd be like a girlfriend, but also it was like times she was like, She was like my mother.

It was just like, there was all this weird other energy that I was attaching that I didn't know it to the relationship I was in. I was expecting this girlfriend to be so many things and more than a human could really be because you got to stand on your own business of your own feelings in your heart. You got to have 10 toes on you. So, yeah, I just felt like, man, it felt like you were putting a lot on that. And no judgment. I'm not judging. I'm just looking at it. Dude, yeah, I was like, the... One time I stayed with a girl that I was... I thought I was in love with them, but really, I didn't want to be alone type shit. I also... Dude, I once stayed with a girl. This is the worst thing to even admit. God, I feel horrible. I stayed with a girl that I couldn't stand. I couldn't really stand her. I loved her also, though, at the same time. That's how love works. You know what I'm saying? Love, I'll give you a bouquet of flowers, but it'll have a... It'll have a knife in the middle of it.

That's That's how love is. But dude, I stayed with this girl one time because I didn't want her to find a guy. I didn't want her to find a guy that would actually care about her. That's crazy, bro. That's crazy. I didn't know at the time that's what I was doing. But yeah, that's what I was like, Man, I'm not breaking up with her because she might find somebody that actually cares about her. Fuck, that's crazy. Does that sound too crazy to even say, Trevin? No, I mean, I think it's the mentality, if I can't have her, no one can. Yeah. Yeah, just like desperate young shit. You know that Romeo and Julian type shit. That's the street version of Romeo and Juliet, Romeo and Julian, bro. That's gay, too, bro. Romeo and Julian sounds hella gay. Holly It would have probably come out with it in a week. Romeo and Julian. All right. Fuck it. I forgot to even give this guy a suggestion. But yeah, I think it's time to let it go. It's time to move on. It's time to tell yourself... Because it's tough to put the responsibility of our own feelings about ourself onto ourself.

It's easy if I can be like, Oh, she's mad at me, or if this is good, or this is always a problem with her, then that keeps me from dealing with anything about me. I would always have a problem. When I was in an early relationship, I'd always have a ton of jealousy. I was so jealous. I think it's tough, bro. It's tough to look at ourselves. Because if I have somebody else, then... But if I just got me, how scary does that feel? That's why when I see a candle, I'm always like, That bitch is brave. When I see a fire, that's just a big RG or whatever. That's just a big RG. But I see a candle, I'm like, Damn, that bitch is standing on business right there. Look, man, and if they're having a child or they're in love or something, don't get in there and be raising that child or whatever, buying that little Don't be buying that little whipper snapper or a little bicycle or whatever, or get them a little shiffer robe or something. Don't be doing all of that shit. Don't go down that path. I think you got to stand on your own shit and get out into your own life, bro.

That's what I feel like. And also, God bless, bro, type shit. I'm going to do a hat toss for you, bro. Shout out to 845 hat toss, bro. All right. We got a thing right here. That fella call up.

Hey, Theo. I've just been listening to a couple of your podcasts a lot recently, and I'm thinking about proposing to my girlfriend, three to almost four years. What's some advice that you would give on doing that and what's something I could add into doing it?

Well, look, I think you have to add something to it. You have to add some charm, because here's the thing, an engagement is the first real moment of a marriage, right? If that means something, if you put something into that, you're going to put something in everything. Maybe, I don't know. It might be out of my mind. I don't know. But I saw this one the other day, and this one disappointed me a little bit. This is a fellow, you can't see this, but this is a fellow in a small home. I believe it's a trailer home, probably. He's asking his lady to marry her. He gets up in the living room near the television. It looks like Mass Singer or something is on, but that's not part of the engagement story. It's just he's standing up, and they got a series of pitbulls running around, beautiful little animals running around. Here we go. He stands up and he's got a ring with him. Here we go. He's beckoning her to get off of the couch to come over and see him. I believe the mother-in-law or a friend is recording. Let's go. Are you on a fart?

I'm here.

You're on a dance?

No. Really? You're very. Yeah.

Look. That's it. She takes the ring, doesn't even hug the guy, walks over to the sofa. So, yeah, it's just a while. He gets down on his knees or he's standing in the living room and he's like, Come over here. Come here. I mean, that's not a way to start. Come here. Come here. You know, like you're fucking mortal combat. And then here's the craziest part. She goes, Are you going to fart? And that's almost beautiful, I guess, in a way, because it's like that if you did do a nice fart or something during the holidays, that you'd want your loved one to be there for it, there's something very tribal about that and very symptomatic or something, maybe. I don't know. But in this sense, you can just tell it's not... Anyway, you don't want to beckon your girl over to hit the need to propose, and she thinks, Oh, you're going to fart, and you want me to get over there and be a witness to it. Now, also, having someone to witness a great fart is nice, but I think it's also nice. One of my favorite things that Shane Gillis ever told me was that when he was in high school, they would sit in the pews because they were at a Catholic school, and they would sit in the pews during Mass, and every now and then somebody would just rip a butt wrangler off of the wooden pews during complete silence when all your friends were in there.

It would just be, I still think about… I still laugh at that sometimes when I'm walking around. There's There's different degrees of handling that. But you want to do something nice. You want to do something that means something. Just being creative. Be creative. Get creative, make something. I It can be silly. It can be ridiculous. It could be a scavenger hunt. It could be maybe you feed the ring to an animal. Maybe you guys like to hunt, right? You hide the ring in some feed for an animal. The animal eats it. Then you guys go out hunt the animal. You get the animal butchered or whatever. Then you make the meal, bam, is venison or something, you crack it open. Yeah, will you marry me? There's different ways to do it. But that's it. I just think What would make it mean something, man? And whatever that means to her as well. What would make her think it's nice? What would make her... What would mean something? Just don't let it be a far, bro. All right, let's get into another call or two. What's up, Theo?

It's Jack from good old Midland, Texas.

We did a shot there in Midland, man. Thank you for the call, Jack. Onward. I don't know.

I was just going to talk about… I feel like sometimes I get a rush to grow up. I'm 18 years old. I graduated high school as a junior. I'm already working. I don't know. Sometimes I just feel like I get in a rush, man. I need to slow down, but I also need to get my life together. I don't know. I was just going to see if you had your mind.

Thanks, brother. Thanks. Sorry to cut you off. Thank you for the call. Yeah. Oh, dude, I've all... I've rushed through everything. Yeah, I don't want to be in anything. I don't want to... I got to be here. I got to do... I got commitment to the... I got commitment, sometimes just to life, to moments. It's hard to slow it down enough. But I think also some of that rush is you want to be able to control things. Well, if I can get freedom to have some money, if I can get freedom to have my own place, if I can get freedom to have my own car, me own wheels, me own station wagon or whatever, me own wheelbar, me pressure washer, me own bass boat, me own girl from me-own. Then you're controlling. You're not in anybody else's orbit, really. You're in control of things. So some of that's nice. When they say discipline equals freedom as well, I mean, Jocco Willing preaches that, that you get things going, you get things organized, and get things cracking. I mean, even like I talk about with that investing app and stuff that I like, it's You know that planning ahead and that strategize, and it helps.

If I were to invest a little bit of change early, I'd have money now. I think there's a lot of value to that. But yeah. Oh, dude, I always want to get through this to get to that. Oh, it'll be better then. Let's just get to that. I'm always out here looking in the distance, and I'll be tripping over beautiful shit while I'm just looking at who knows what that's a million miles away. I don't know if it's bad or good. I think you're saying, like you said right in here, you said, let's play it.

I'm already working. I don't know. Sometimes I just feel I feel like I get in a rush, man. I need to slow down, but I also need to get my life together.

Yeah, slow down, rush, get my life together. I don't know.

I was just going to see if you had your mind.

Yeah. That's it, man. You're doing fine. Meditation will help you slow down for sure to give you a little bit of peace, even in moments of overwhelmingness. That might be all you need. You're really sticking to some meditation, man. That way, you can be You're going fast, but you're slow on the inside, baby. You're in control. You got a cockpit. You're not just running around with your cop. Type shit, boys. Praise God. That's what's up. Hey, Santa. Hey. Let's say you write a letter to Santa telling him how good you've been this year, and then you hand it to your mail carrier. But your mail carrier is the Grinch. There's a reason why you wouldn't let The Grinch deliver holiday mail, just like there's a reason why Morgan & Morgan is America's largest injury law firm. When you have a problem, you want experts to handle it. Morgan & Morgan has a proven track record of fighting for the people for over 35 years. With over $25 billion recovered for their clients, Morgan & Morgan knows a thing or two about fighting to get you the compensation you deserve. Not all law firms are the same.

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I thought it'd be a fun thing to take my wife to a raid room, and we went out for dinner first, and everything was good. We wasn't arguing or anything. And we went in this raid room. Hell, she started beating the piss out of me. And it really pissed me off. I don't know why she done it, but it turned me on. I wanted to swing back, but she had a bat in her hand, and it didn't look It didn't look too fun. But it would have been hard to fight her when I was bricked up. But we went home and had a quiet ride home. As soon as we got home, I was so bripped up. I just ended up just plowing that thing.

You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. 40 acres in a mule, baby.

I was just wondering your advice on that. I don't even know what brought it on, but Well, look, if you watch a woman beat the shit out of a damn Honda Civic or whatever and break all the windows and headlights out of that bitch with a baseball bat, then you don't get erect.

Then you're some little hoe. I mean, shit like that turned me on, dude. Especially where I grew up, dude. Every now and then, you see a come out there angry at her husband or some guy that was having sex with her and not claiming her. You'd see a woman come out there and beat the book and just beat the dang headlights out of his Caprice Classic. God. Hell, yeah. No, man, there's nothing wrong with getting erect if you see a woman beating the shit out of something with a bat. I mean, that's why I love the whole movie of League of Their Own. That's what the whole movie is. There's nothing wrong with that. God, yeah. Now, you're all so lucky. I can't keep an erection around broken glass. Cannot do it. Dude, if my wiener hears a window shatter within probably 80 yards, that thing just pokes a tiny field right into my nuts, maybe that thing won't be out. That thing just saw its shadow, dog. Eight more weeks of winter down. But God, I used to love that type of shit. In our neighborhood, this lady used to make me go sit in her car with her, and she'd be all drunk, drinking daqueries.

Ms. Carroll, that was her name. She'd be drinking daqueries over there. She would just tell me She wish I was old enough to drive. I wish you were old enough to drive. I'd let you drive me somewhere. God, I was so fucking erect. I couldn't even... God, I couldn't. My fucking scoliosis was cured. I was just like, Oh, God. Then she'd get out. Sometimes she had cut off pants on, and she'd get out and rub the bottom of her butt on the damn warm of that car, that vehicle. That's back when the headlights used to get warm. That bitch used to get warm. She'd just be bending over, drinking that daqury and rubbing her little tail on that warm light. Wish you could drive me. I'm like, Yeah, damn, brother. Hell, yeah. God, I couldn't even... I didn't have enough blood flow in my eyes at that moment. I just had so much erection going on. I didn't even have any blood in my eyes to keep me active. I could barely see. It's like my damn brother, he had to come over and rub some of his water in my eyes. Yeah, it must be a family optical disease that we got in certain moments.

But God is good, brother. At least you have a wife. At least you all are going out and doing something. Yeah, taking your wife to a rage room, that's cute. All that matters is what am I putting into the relationship? Whether I'm getting married, whether I'm doing anything an engagement. What am I putting into this thing? Am I trying to make some moments special? Because if I don't make some moments special, it ain't going to be no special moments. That's the most I realize just about life. Sometimes I'll be like, Man, nothing's exciting. Well, things just aren't exciting. They're not just going to be magic. You got to be your own David Blaine sometimes or Chris Angle. Or Kurt Angle even. Shit, I don't care if you wear a damn leotard while you do it, or a unitar and body slam somebody. But you got to bring the magic. Except at Christmas, That's when there's just something built in. There's just something special about it. Just that sound, those kids coming down the stairs. You see that Christmas tree, boy. I'd come later at night, too. We all would. I bet if I asked my siblings, we all did.

People would wake up at a certain... You just woke up all night during Christmas time. You just sneak down. At some point, the presents would be out. You're like, Oh, they're hiking. Half the cookies would be eating. I'd eat two bites out of that bitch. Hell, sometimes I'd come down early and the cookies and milk hadn't been eaten yet. I'd eat. I'd drink half that bitch and eat one of them bitches. My mom was like, Who was here? But yeah, you'd come down and you'd see that tree all lit up. That was one of the nicest times to go back to bed then. You were just excited. It wasn't really about the gifts. It was something about the magic of it. There was free magic. Yeah, it just meant something. That was beautiful. Those were beautiful times. That Christmas spirit That Christmas spirit, man, there's something to it. There's something to it. I want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas, and I'm trying to think of anything else that needs to be said. It's a special time of year. It's a special time to forgive ourselves and forgive others. Just to let go. Let go of the ways we've done it.

Yeah, ask God to help us have a new year. The Lord sent his son, baby, that crazy baby. Jesus, baby. Yahweh, baby. To take away the sins of the world. Let him do it. Let him do it, baby. Lord, drive a dump truck into my heart and take away all this. All this. Confusion, pain, uncertainty, control, Anger, hatred, vitral, and self-infliction. Take away. Just take it. Take it and recycle me, baby boy. Recycle me. I love you guys. Thank you guys so much for letting me be a part of your year. There is some fun stuff that we're going to be doing in the new year. I'm excited. I want to add some new things to the solo episodes that are going to be more regular occurring type of things. I have some just light plans and strategy. We want to talk to more miracles. We've got a couple of miracles. We had that one fellow that was doing dope that fell off that building, and he fell 13 stories or whatever. He passed by some of his neighbors, remember, and saw them smoking dope on their balcony when he fell. Pretty crazy. And then our other fellow got hit by two trains, baby.

Two trains! And God, and he survived. He had headphones on and got hit. Just, whew. God, damn, brother. Sometimes, whew. You wish the Lord would just give you a crosswalk. Give me a crosswalk.

Yeah, that was Dalton.

Dalton, baby. Two Trays. We got to check in with Dalton, but we want to add more miracles to next year. If you have experienced a miracle or someone you know in your life that has experienced a miracle, that have felt the powers of the great beyond, keep them safe in a moment that could not have happened otherwise. Hit the hotline, 985-664-9503, or you can contact the producers through the on the theovan. Com site. Yeah, that's all we got. We're happy to be alive. Who knows what it looks like. This may be the last year we're allowed to celebrate Christmas. I'm not sure what they have planned for us. But we're going to keep fighting. We're going to keep fighting, and we're excited to try to do that and to learn as we go. We go. Trevon, what are you thinking? I dig it, man. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas to you, too, man. Merry Christmas to you, too. Our producer put in this note right here. Our other producer, Zack, Merry Christmas to him. Nick, Andrew Baxter, Raleigh Mel, who knocked a woman up. Gosh, that's crazy, dude. But that's how it is, bro. I think he had sex five times in that fifth time he made a child.

Boy, bro, you got to use that syrup sparingly, homie. Dang. But it is what it is. I remember when I learned about condensed milk, dude, the second I had one taste of that stuff, I was like, Dang, this shit's good. Then you want to use it. You want it on everything, but you can't put it on everything, Raleigh. All right, here we go. One more call from the hotline before we end the year, and next week, we'll have a best of episode, and then we may have a week off. I'm not sure. We may not. We'll see what's going on. But I love you guys, and you guys be good to yourselves. Thank you. Thank you for all the support. There's so many nice things that I never get to say that happen. Nice messages people send or nice things people brought out to shows. I mean, just all it does. There's so much kindness has been extended towards me by you guys. Thank you. I love you, and I appreciate it. Here we go.

Hey, Theo. My name is Jake. What's up, Jake?

Thank you for calling onward.

I'm feeling a little emotional right now, but in a really good way. I'm in the military. I've been in the army for over six years now.

Thank you for your service, champ. Omer.

I'm currently driving home to go spend Christmas with my family for the first time in four years. I just wanted to thank God that I'm able to do that. I want to reach out to all my fellow soldiers who listen to your great podcast and just say, if you're able to go visit your family, I'm very happy for you. If you're not able to, if you have to spend it somewhere where you don't really want to be, I know how it feels. I know a lot of other soldiers know how it feels. It sucks, but we're here for you, and stay strong. I know it sucks missing holidays, birthdays, kids' birthdays, and all of that. So thank you, Theo, for what you do. You've got me through a lot of these years that I've spent away from my family. Prayers to you and your team and prayers to all my fellow soldiers out there spending Christmas with their family or without them. Love you, brother.

Amen. Amen, man. Yeah, that's the feeling. That's the feeling. That's the candle. That's the pilot light I needed right there. When I'm pulling up to my family's or I'm going to walk into my home just to be grateful that I get to be there. For the positive or the negative, whatever it is, for the apple pie or the uncooked dang chowder or whatever somebody made one time forgot to boil the dang things and everybody got a dang dysenter, whatever. Clams or whatever. Yeah, that's the thing. For the good, the bad, whatever it is, that there's people that don't get it. There's kids that are going to have to spend the They have to do their holidays over Zoom with a loved one. There's a parent that has to do that as well. A soldier who's made that choice in their life. It's a choice they made, but still, it's one I'm I'm not brave enough to make or haven't been. So to take some time to acknowledge that, pray for those families and that peace. Just to know that you soldiers aren't alone. Put that energy into the world. These people, they're not alone. We pray for them and their kids grow up healthy and nurtured and taken care of.

That we pray for the confidence of their spouses who are at home on the front lines with their children, holding things down, having to be one parent. Not one parent, but do most of the hands-on parenting. We pray for those people and those soldiers that then when they get to spend time with their camarades during the holidays away from their family, that they feel some sense of joy and peace and love. Light a candle for those people this time of year. Yeah, maybe I need to. Every time I'm lighting a candle, I'm thinking it's for my own light. Why don't I light one for somebody else? For a prayer in peace for somebody else's joy. Or possibility. For a moment that's not mine. Yeah, those are great things to pray for. I watch those soldier coming home videos all the time, and God, I will just start bawling right into a ding bag of raffles. Then they do the dog sometimes. Sometimes, low key, the dog does not know the person. I'm like, Well, this shit, something's going on here. But Sometimes at the airport, you'll see somebody waiting for somebody with flowers and a sign or something.

Or when the soldiers… One time I was in Chicago, and I think it was… I don't remember the airline. But a bunch of soldiers had just gotten back. They'd all just gotten back, and they were walking all back. I mean, like a hundred. It was just this huge thing. It was like a special moment. But thank you, brother. Thank you for helping us think about that. That's the feeling. That's the You guys be good to yourselves. Let's go out with some music here. The music we've played already is from One Man Quartet that played Christmas Miracle. Ready for Christmas was by Zoro. Then this song we're going to play right here on our way out, We wish you a Merry Christmas by Timothy Infinite. Merry Christmas to everybody. Love you guys. Glad we got to spend some time together today. Hey, it's Santa. Dog, I heard blitzing as a bitch, homie. Ever you are, good tidings for Christmas and a happy New Year. Wish you a Merry-Prancer's a fgget, homie. Prancer's a fgget, homie. Merry Christmas, everybody. God bless you. And head into a happy New Year while we'll meet you there. And praise God, man.

Be good to yourselves. You deserve it. Persil sorgt schon seit 1907 für tiefenreine Wäsche, auch bei den Johnson's, oder Anna? Das stimmt. Sogar meine Oma hat schon mit Persil gewaschen. Und als Dankeschön für über 100 Jahre Vertrauen gibt's jetzt bis zu 15 Euro Rabatt auf unser Bestes. Das mit der roten Schleife. Genau. Made in Germany. Mehr Infos auf unserbestes. Persil. De. Wenn es tiefenrein ist, ist es Persil.