You are listening to the Dan Le Batard Show, in partnership with the DraftKings Sports app. Now live in all 50 states.
This episode of the Dan Le Batard Show is presented by DraftKings Sports.
Wait.
Oh, no!
The elevator's broken.
That elevator's broken.
Oh, no! We had to close the door.
DraftKings, the crown is yours.
Wonderful. Excellent execution. Look at this. We've been waiting all summer. We've been waiting for this. Who is going to replace Michael Biamonte as just the 3rd ever PA announcer for the Miami Heat? No, how badly does the first guy feel? No one knows his name. I have no idea who it was. I don't. I think Mike B joined in the 2nd season. And after all of those years, Gail Nelson is the new PA announcer. announcer. Yeah, welcome, welcome. We don't have to say welcome to Miami. I mean, you're a Miami guy. President and CEO of the Big Brothers Big Sisters Club. Uh, I have a little bit of exp— well, me— not me, you know, essentially Big Brothers Big Sisters, but a good friend of mine growing up was in the program.
I love that.
I love it.
Yeah, he, he lost his father when he was young, so he had a big brother, and I would— he would bring me— I would go out with them sometimes. We'd do activities and stuff. So I'm familiar with the Big Brother Big Sister program. I mean, we're talking like 40 years ago. But, uh, you're a Miami guy, obviously. Uh, congratulations, you must be very excited.
No, I'm very excited. And I want to— I'm so excited, uh, Jonathan, that I want to just go ahead and introduce you. Can I just go ahead and do that?
Oh yes, wow, like an intro!
You ready? You ready?
Yeah.
All right, at 5'7¾ at guard, from Santa Fe Community College, Jonathan Zaslow!
Yeah, I like it, I like it too.
Goosebumps. Come on, brother.
Don't leave him hanging there.
I like it.
I saw you had a facial expression. You had a reaction to that.
Well, because I didn't— that's not the school I went to. But I'll take it nonetheless. I enjoyed that.
Well, my informants, you know, I'm only as good as my media guy.
Yeah, yeah. And you had the height down. You did. I appreciate the extra 3/4 of an inch. All right. That is very nice of you.
That's what it's all about.
You need that.
So how did this come about this offseason? Take us through the process.
Well, when given the opportunity, you know, obviously, you know, Mike B is a legend. He's a dear friend, such a kind man. I got to just give props to my man Mike B first. But when asked to audition and I went down, applied, auditioned, first time I got on the microphone, it was magical. It was magical.
When you applied, okay, so you applied, auditioned. Did you think you had a real chance at this?
I won't say it because everything I've done has been with swag, with confidence, but also with humility. And so when they heard my voice, and one of the things that was important to me and important to the Heat is the person's got to be themselves. There were so many Mike B wannabes, and I'm not dissing any of the applicants, don't get me wrong, but that's what makes the Heat culture so strong. You got to be you. And so I was me. I wake up with these pipes. And so I brought that, the bass, a little baritone, and we did what we had to do. So There was some confidence, but what I love about it was there was rigor. They're gonna push you. And so that's what we do with the Heat. I was pushed. It's like, bring that up, push that. And here we are. I am humbled to be the 3rd PA announcer for your Miami Heat.
Talk more about this audition. What was your performance? And did you have to do it in a room or did they have you do it actually on the court with a microphone?
Oh no, no, we do it with the— it's a real— I was in the practice court. I was— then I went to the— I started off in the bowl, you know, with some scripts and reading, you know, some of the informative stuff. Then you get into the performative stuff as well. So it was twofold. So in the practice court, and then I walk in for one of my final auditions, and here comes Spo. And I'm like, oh, this, this just got real.
Yeah.
Then I look— it was like being on American Idol. Then I look across the practice court, and there's 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 people sitting there just looking at me. I'm like, this is American Idol. This is The Voice. This is everything. And then Spo is just standing in the coach's spot, arms folded just like you, Zach.
Hey, hey, hey.
And he just gives me— comes over and shakes my hand and says, you know, I don't wanna put any pressure on you. Good luck. And here we go. And so he had some college players out there doing their thing, you know. So when you got a 5'7¾ with number 7 on it, you know, I'm thinking, what's he— I'm memorizing the numbers. Okay, 7, Giannis. So it's like 7 passes to 13, tosses it up. 13 dunked it.
So I'm like, bam, adubayo from Giannis.
And so I had to bring it. This was a real simulation, real scenarios.
So they had essentially a game going on in front of you for you to call.
Simulated game for me to call. Because who— I mean, again, that's how you know. It's one thing to have the pipes, but you got to go with the flow and you got to, you know, we got to bring the heat. It's always caliente in Miami.
I think a lot of people are wondering. I know when you were introduced on social media, the team put out the video earlier in the week. You confirmed Dos Dos minutos, 2 minutes, that's still going to be a thing, right?
I tell you what, I want to make sure that Heat Nation is not alarmed. This is not a 5-alarm fire. Dos minutos is here to stay, baby.
But what about some of the other phrases? Like, you have your own voice, you're not trying to do a Mike Biamonte impression.
That's correct.
Which is certainly the right way to go about it, but what about, you know, some of the other lingo that he has made synonymous with the PA announcing in the arena?
Give me something, give me an example.
When there's traveling.
Like, too many steps. Yeah, I like that.
See, too many steps.
There's, there's difference. See, I don't go with the— I'm going— I'm not going to higher bars.
That's okay.
Yeah. You know, so I may just bring like the too many steps, hit ball, right? I mean, so I'm feeling that.
That's good.
And I need, I need, you know, just as like, let me know. I mean, if you all boo me here today, I may not do it.
I would say like, give me something at the start of a game or after like a big moment in the 3rd or 4th quarter. Yeah, come on, get the crowd going.
Stand up.
See, there's a couple things I'm thinking about on that.
That's a big one.
See, you know, check this out too. They got to get the booming music going first because that— it's about— see, you leverage the music in a situation like that. So it's dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.
And now stand up and make some noise for your Miami Heat! Hired! Perfect. You know what?
You're hired, Dale.
Perfect.
So see, that's— see, again, one of the things I'm gonna do to preserve— I mean, this is— hey, this is— we're taking this all the way to the Larry O'Brien, baby.
Yeah.
And so one of the things I got to do is make sure I'm not trying to be, you know, Michael Jackson. I got to stay down here in the Barry White.
Yeah.
You know, because that's, that's, that's my, that's my zone. But one of the things with the PA announcer, you got to know your range. You got to know— see, that's my nuance. So what we're keeping, that we're keeping Dos Minutos, we're keeping— but I'm going not only with now stand up, but when I bring the team out, You ready for this?
Oh yeah.
When I bring the team out, 'cause see, again, one of the things I was thinking about in my auditions, I'm like, okay, I'm very much into just rhythm and rhyme. And so, you know, I got a few bars, but, and with that, Zazz and team, when I bring the team out, it's like, and now, I'm not gonna do it full, but, and now get on your feet. Let's meet your Miami Heat.
Very good.
So that's how we, that's how, so this is a sneak peek. This is breaking news. It's breaking news. Y'all all in? That's how we roll.
Yeah, I like it.
All in.
Can we get to what will be the main event for you at the intros? Can we hear a sneak peek of what you're going to do with Giannis? I mean, the first time, that's going to be a huge moment in, in the arena.
You mean how I plan to introduce Giannis?
Yeah.
Well, see, a couple of things with that. I did it. I did some research and I talked to Giannis about this. And it was funny because Giannis's question to me was, are you Nigerian? This is at media day.
Uh-huh.
And I'm like, no, because he did an interview with Serge Ibaka. Serge does these food items and all that, you know, cooking weird foods and having his teammates eat it. And Giannis talked about his, his roots in Nigeria, Aredo. And so if you look at his former team pronunciation guide, NBA.com, it's Aredo Kunbo. And every single day people pronounce Giannis's name 15 different ways. And so when I surprised the guys at Heat media day and he was over there, he was eating a sandwich and it's on— he released this already. He's over eating a sandwich and I'm like, okay, that's a 6'11 forward, you know, number 7, Giannis Antetokounmpo. And he looks at me, gives me a fist bump. And so my thing is, who better than the man himself to approve how he wants his name pronounced. So one, yeah, I use the NBA.com media guide pronunciation guide. I'm gonna do my research, I'm gonna do my homework. But when— that's when he came over, he's like, how'd you know that? So that was pretty cool. So that's how we're gonna bring Giannis out, take him back to his culture, respect his culture, and bring him out the way his mama named him.
Well, what about you yourself? Are you going to have your own signature line?
Oh yeah, one of the things I want to do, I want to nuance this thing. It's a feel, it's organic, my feed off the crowd. And I'm thinking about, you know, when it comes to 3s, like Klay told me, Klay's like, you know, Klay for 3. So I may work that in a little bit. I may work in, because then obviously you can always go with 3 when they shoot a 3-pointer and all of that. But what I'm thinking about is probably hitting from downtown.
Oh, okay.
Because we're in downtown Miami.
Yeah, yeah, okay.
And it's from distance. So I want to make sure that, and again, you got to walk before you run, but I want to make sure that, you know, Heat Nation gets to know me. And as I bring up my own things, yes, we're certainly doing too many steps, doing dos menudas as we talked about, but I'm feeling that from downtown.
Okay, so when you say you want everyone to get to know you, I want to hear a little bit about how you become the president and CEO of the Big Brothers and Big Sisters Club. Like I said, I had a very small experience with them, but this is a program that's extremely special and has been around for a long time.
I got it. Can I just work in my personal story just for a second? It feeds right into mentorship and the microphone. So I was born in Lincoln, Nebraska. Mom named me Curtis Anthony. My dad changed my name to Gale Sayers Nelson. I'm named after Hall of Famer Gale Sayers. My dad was a huge Chicago Bears fan. And so parents divorced when I was 2. Dad was a contractor. Hurricane Andrew hit. He came down here to rebuild. I wanted to just get to know my dad. So it starts with the need for mentorship. But my high school, my freshman year in high school, former NBA player, the late James E. Ray, my high school principal, gives me a microphone. So mentorship for that, without my dad being there in my life, James E. Ray, the late James E. Ray gives me a microphone to an NBA player, has me doing sports announcements. Then I'm here in South Florida and I started running a school down in South Dade near Cutler Ridge, uh, Bay Point Schools that was for court-committed, uh, boys and got to, went to jail. Then they came to me, but I wanted to help kids before they got in trouble.
And that's what brought me to Big Brothers Big Sisters Miami. I started as vice president of programs in July 2006. I've served the organization for 20 years. And so I can relate to it because I was one of those kids, you know, single mom growing up, raising 2 boys. And so I'm her baby boy. So Gayle Sayers is famously quoted as saying, give me 18 inches of daylight. That's all I need. Well, Gayle Sayers Nelson, when given this opportunity, 18 inches of daylight, mentorship, and a microphone, and I'm thankful to serve the kids. I work for the kids. I work for the kids and families in Miami. And that's what's so beautiful. I got 160 people, bigs, littles, coming to the Red, White, and Pink game next Tuesday. And those kids in the stands can find their voice. They can see me and they can relate to, here's a young brother that worked hard. Keep your head down. And I'm looking forward to an exciting event. How about that? Looking forward to an exciting event.
How about that?
My daughter literally just signed up for Big Sisters Big Brothers.
Oh, I love that. I love that. We're always looking for people to join the team. Everything we do is free for the bigs and littles. for the families. Had a mom, and think about this, you talked about a friend of yours who had, you know, signed up and was part of the program. Darren Smith, 2-time Hall of— 2-time national champion with the Canes, 2-time Super Bowl champion with the Cowboys, was the little brother. I got Darren on speed dial. Played for Jimmy Johnson. He lost his dad on Tuesday.
It's a great program.
Lost his dad. His mom signed him up. I spent time with him and his mom and his brothers, and he's living proof. So we, we have 2 little brothers that have won. We have 2 little brothers that have won 3 Super Bowls. Darren's won 2, and most recently, Josh Jobe, right from Washington Avenue in Coconut Grove, just won the Super Bowl with the Seattle Seahawks. The first game of the NFL season, guess who got that pick in end zone? See ball, get ball was little brother Josh Jobe. So how about that? That's what we do in the game of life. We help these kids.
It's a great program.
Really, really gross stand-up.
Also very important when— when a player for the other team scores.
Oh my goodness. Give me any player. Any player.
Okay, give it—
Luol Deng.
Okay, Luol Deng. Good.
That's good.
Yes, that's good.
Say it with that same disdain.
I'm telling you, it's gonna be so— I want it to be so meaningless.
Yeah. Yes, yes.
I want it to be meaningless.
How about this? That on an offensive foul now on the other team. On, on, yeah, on them.
All right, offensive foul. Okay, let's go. Let's play it out.
That foul was offensive, LeBron James.
Let's see.
I think that's right, Juju. That's right. The James— this— that's the guy to talk about is LeBron James. How are you going to handle him specifically? I suggest you do you. Don't even call him LeBron. Just call him James. 2 points, James.
I kind of like that.
Oh, just going the last name. That's, that's something to think about.
You know, I may get some feedback from basketball ops on that. Yes, of course. The Heat culture is like, of course, we got to be respectful. That's it.
Yeah.
I mean, that was one of the things that was stressed throughout because I was— I did a few things I'm going to share that where I was like, okay, we can do this, we can do that. And they're like, no, we ain't doing that. We're not doing that. We know you're going to be very respectful. We're going to kick their butt on the court. But it's— I love LeBron James.
You're gonna make your debut at the Red, White, and Pink Game, which is coming up on October 6th, and then of course first home preseason game, which is October 8th. Just what are we talking, 6 days away?
Absolutely.
Gale, congratulations.
I appreciate it.
Really great. I think we're all impressed.
Welcome aboard.
Thank you, fellas.
Thank you.
Great job. That's Gale Nelson right there, the new PA announcer for the Miami Heat, and again, very importantly, president and CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Miami and the Florida Keys, which is the premier youth mentoring program here in South Florida. Awesome. We'll see you at the arena, Gail. All right, appreciate it. There you go. Thanks for being a good sport.
Zach, don't you need to get him doing at least one, you know, about that Thai food? I mean, isn't that a missed opportunity?
Let's not spoil the things we're gonna record, okay? All right, Dave?
Okay, okay.
We don't have to give away all the trade secrets. live on the show. Thank you, thank you very much. Alright, I think, I think we all liked what we heard, right guys?
Oh yeah, good stuff, definitely.
That was very good. Yep, a mix of bringing a little bit of new but keep some of the old but with your own style. No one wants a Mike B impersonator, no one's asking for that. Alright, but you know, keep some of the same stuff. I think that's the way to go. That's good stuff.
The only one we didn't ask him about that I was curious, because he says he doesn't really want to go high, when there's like no basket Nooooo!
See, that's where I got confused. The no basket, too many steps. I put too many baskets.
Tony said too many baskets.
Yeah, I meant no basket, but then I said too many baskets. You know what I mean, though?
Yeah.
He thinks you're a dork now.
He didn't hear it.
Oh, okay. All right. There you go. Good for him. What a gig.
That gave me goosebumps. Yeah. Hearing him.
You were very excited. Yep.
Yeah.
And the brother has morals. That's the most important thing. The brother is a good brother.
He has scruples.
Mm-hmm.
I've never stepped foot on that campus.
I—
if you told me right now your life depends on it, go to Santa Fe University and just, just, just take a picture.
I would die.
I don't know where it is.
This is the Dan Levitar Show.
All right, I think you guys know what time it is. You're probably saying to yourself, Zaslav, It's Friday. I gotta know. There's a lot happening here. Is it a big game or is it not a big game?
Howdy folks, welcome to Big Game or Not a Big Game with Jonathan Zaslow. Big Game, Not a Big Game is presented by the all-new Lawn Mower. Lawn Mower Go from Manscaped.
Yep, there you have it. I got a couple of these Manscaped razors at home.
They're so good, dude.
I got one that's for my face. Gotta keep the beard looking trim. And then I got this one here. It's for your groin.
I'm listening.
Yeah.
Trimming the lawn.
Yeah, I just want to make sure I'm looking good and presentable. You know what I'm saying?
It's good to go down to that area and not have a worry.
I know.
Because, you know, in, you know, Razor's past that I've had, there's a big worry that thing will bleed.
All right.
Yeah, big game or not a big game, you know what I'm talking about. Dave Damashek, what do you got for me?
Come on.
We're moving on from Juju v. his wiener, um, or, or the Razor v. his wiener, either way.
Okay, I know we didn't know, we got it, we got to tackle it, we got to tackle it. It's more of a Scrote.
Yeah. Sitch. Yeah.
That I'm looking to quell, if you will.
Yeah.
That's not even close to an issue with Manscaped though. Manscaped is the best.
Absolutely.
Those issues are a thing of the past thanks to Manscaped.
All right.
I know fancy pants ACC people are very excited for the ACC version of what we saw last week in the SEC, which is an Orange Bowl. Tennessee and Texas gives way Now to the Canes v. Clemson. Meantime, tonight, the big game of the ACC. James Franklin, Jimmy, moved away. I don't know if everybody heard, he moved out of, out of Happy Valley and he's now in Blacksburg, Virginia. Undefeated, his Hokies are. Here comes the Dews and the Pitt Panthers. Mason Heinzel, a, a dark horse Heisman contender. Heinzel Also undefeated. Huge game for the ACC. The winner, whether you like it or not, is in line, at least for the time being, to be one of the 12 teams to make the playoffs.
Hey, can we get to the question already, Dave?
Big game or not a big— I'm sorry, I, I'm very excited for tonight.
What was the game?
Pitt and Virginia Tech. This is, guys, this is the first time in, in like 1,000 years maybe ever that you've had 2 4-0 teams facing each other unranked from Power 4 conferences, unranked at this point in the season.
Missouri is ranked though, keep in mind. They lost, but, but they're ranked for some reason.
No, that— yes, you're right. Well, I think we know the reason. Uh, look, it was only a couple weeks ago where you had SMU-Louisville, and the conversation, right, was, hey, if the Canes are a lock to get to the ACC Championship, these 2 teams here, they're, they're playing for who's going to meet them. I think you could say the same thing about this one here tonight, Pitt and Virginia Tech. So obviously, Dave, Pitt-Virginia Tech, that's a big game. That's right, that's right. Chris Cody, what do you got for me? Big game, not big game?
I mean, he mentioned— I'm going to show Dave how to do this— number 4 Miami At unranked Clemson Saturday night. Big game or not a big game?
You know about that 58-nothing, uh, FireAl Golden game? You know about that?
I remember that.
You know about that Dabo Swinney who, who, who gives his team the turnover chain and films it in the locker room and they cut the turnover chain with big scissors and, and, and all cheer? You know about that?
I remember that.
You know about Dabo Swinney Death Valley, they run down that huge hill. He sprints out in front of everyone. You know about that being scared of falling and tumbling all the way down that hill? I know about that.
You know about that?
That's a different segment, isn't it?
Yeah. Miami, Clemson. Kane's gonna take that ass. That's a big game.
Oh yeah.
That's right. That's a big— Roy, big game, not a big game?
You mentioned Missouri being ranked. Well, Mizzou is hosting the Florida Gators. The Gators are 8 in the nation right now. Big game or not a big game?
Oh, hell yeah. The Florida Gators. You should hear some of this conversation around the Florida Gators. I heard Josh Pate have a conversation a couple days ago.
Are the Flor—
could, could this Florida Gator team rival the LSU team that won the national championship? People are talking crazy.
The answer is no.
People are talking crazy. This is crazy talk about the Florida Gators, but the Florida Gators are back, and if the Gators can win this game here All of a sudden you're looking at potentially a Florida-Texas matchup in Austin. Gators at the number 1 team in the country in 2 weeks will be undefeated versus undefeated. That would be a monster of a matchup, but it doesn't happen without the Gators winning this game Saturday afternoon. Gators-Missouri, that's a big game.
Big game.
You know what I'm talking about, Tony. Big game, not a big game.
High noon, staying in the SEC. Battle of 2 quarterbacks that I very much like, Keelan Russell versus Kamario Taylor. Alabama, number 7 in the country. Mississippi State rising, 16th in the country in Starkville. Big game, not a big game.
Look, I was saying it last year, uh, you guys were joking around. Hey, not so funny right now when I say, hey, Mississippi State, sneaky decent team. You guys made fun of me last year. Who's laughing now? Who's laughing now? Kamario Taylor, you're right. You mentioned maybe the most exciting player in the country. Alabama though, I know there's a lot of, you know, talk around Caleb DeBoer. He's, he's very polarizing. Caleb DeBoer wins the big games, like when he's been at Alabama so far and when he was at Washington. He's very good in the big games. It's the lesser opponents where he gets tripped up. That's been the issue. with him in Alabama. Alabama, Mississippi State, that's a big game.
Big game.
Chris, you got another one for me? Big game or not a big game?
I got one more. Tonight, Friday night, Chris and his wife going on a double date with one of my wife's co-workers and her husband.
Oh boy.
That's it.
Big game or not a big game?
Oh, okay. Now, have you ever met this person?
I have met him.
All right, cuz I'll tell you something. My wife, she'll say, you know, she's becoming like good friends with someone at work, and, you know, she's telling me, and the first thing I say, I go, don't make plans. We're not—
we're not—
I'm not going out with them. I have no interest. I don't care who her husband— I don't know him. I'm not trying to make new friends.
He loves sports.
Oh, great. And, and, and he loves you. He, he thinks you're so funny. Well, prepare him to be really disappointed, all right? I have no interest in, in this social setting that you're putting together. So Chris and his wife, coworker and her husband double date? That is not a big game. Not a big game. That's terrible. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for you. I feel bad for you. That's a terrible scenario. All right, we got time for one more. Juju, big game or not a big game?
Man, my brother, the Dallas Wings are taking on the Golden State Valkyrie for a chance to move on to the WNBA semifinals. Winner goes home— no, loser goes home, actually.
Yeah, unless it's a home game for the winner. I don't know.
You see what I'm saying? Big game or not a big game?
Paige Bueckers, can she win a playoff series in her very first year? Now, Golden State Valkyries, can they win a playoff series in their very first year?
Second year.
In their second year, like I said, that'd be crazy. Dallas, Golden State, Game 3, do or die. That's a big game.
Big game.
Ah, I swerved you there. You didn't think I was gonna do that. People out there listening like, oh, Zaslow, he always like dissing women. No, no, no, fooled you. And that right there is another addition.
Is that what people say about you?
That's what people say. A big game or not a big game. Yes, yes. All right, all right, it's a lot happening. I'm not traveling this weekend. This is the first weekend of the college football season that I'm not traveling. I'm still doing the shows, but they're like home— it's a home game, you know? So I think it has to do with the Major League Baseball, the playoffs. So I'm not traveling this weekend.
Well, it sounds like you're free then to go on a double date then.
No.
No, no, I, I can't.
I— it—
You guys can join if you'd like.
No, I, I would not like.
Where are you guys going?
I would not like.
A restaurant.
A good one? Oh, so what's the cuisine?
My wife picked. I'm not even sure.
What's the cuisine? You don't know?
Italian.
What's Italian?
Dan Le Batard.
I don't like the word blue, but I do have at least one pal that I can think of who has— he actually, he says he fell asleep in coitus.
Dave Demachek.
You may look at me and be surprised to hear this. I happen to be a vigorous lovemaker, so that would never happen to me. This is the Dan Le Batard Show.
Have you ever been in a social setting though with these people?
I met this guy at a holiday party and he's a nice guy, like, I hope.
And he does—
They're all nice. Like, no, that—
like, not everybody's nice, Daz. That's not true. Not everybody's nice.
You're not nice.
Goddamn, man.
He just said it. He just said he wasn't interested in any double date that his wife sets up.
Are you?
I mean, depends. Do I know the guy? Do me and him get along? Does he want to talk to me about stuff that I don't care about? That's always tough. Oh, stock market, huh?
Okay. Who is— okay, so you self-identify as a not nice person because I think you present as a generally pretty nice person. No, I think I don't.
I think I'm very nice, but I also think that a— I think a character flaw that I have is— I think I'm really self-aware, so I can admit this. I think a character flaw that I have is I am hard to warm up to. Not that people have a hard time warming up to me, I have a hard time warming up to them. I don't think I'm very good in that spot. It takes me a while to do that. But I think I'm nice.
Is that because, do you suppose, I, 'cause to me, I always assume when I meet anybody, it's like, you have somebody or something better to do than talk to me. And that's my starting position with everybody. And then people like, you know, so, but then I seem like the jerk for having that. It's like, I just don't wanna take up your time kind of vibe. Who is then, if it's not Zaslow and it's not me, who's the nicest person in there right now?
Juju, for sure.
I think it has to be Juju.
Salute to y'all. I appreciate it. I tried to leave, but—
He was mean to me. He was mean to me 20 minutes ago when he got—
No, I was—
no, see, that's, that's what people confuse when you be real with somebody versus being mean. So that means you got a lot of people in your life scared to be real with you, big bro. Wrap it up a little sooner. We can all be involved.
Too late, man. This is— I, I've already started down this path. There's no way I'm gonna reverse it at this late date.
Now, Chris, will you and your wife come up with a game plan as far as topics?
No, I'm usually pretty good in that spot.
Icebreakers?
She— if it's a spot, if it was a situation where I didn't know the person, she would hit me with like, this is something about them that you can bring up.
A topic sheet? Don't talk about the topic sheet.
Just a little something about like, oh, this person has this interest, so if you want to go there at some point.
Because my wife will do the thing where, okay, you know, you could talk to him about this, you could talk to him about this, and I'm like, or I could just drink myself into a stupor and then I don't have to worry about any of that.
Always a sign for a good dinner, like, couple to go with is when we arrive, because there's always that like 5 to 10 minutes before you go to the table, you know.
Like, do you get there first or do you get there last?
I like to get—
I like a little pre-drink, a little pre-dinner drink.
Yeah, I want to go. I want to— I think, you know, going to the bar for 5 minutes loosens you up a little.
If I, if I have a guy that's like, all right, me and you, we'll go to the bar, and they can stay here and wait for the table.
Well, yeah, that's the first thing I'll do. I'll say, hey, you want to go to the bar? Let's go drink.
And then if it— but it's like, no, I'm good. Like, if it's a know I'm good guy, and I don't, I don't want to like build up like you have to be this big drinker around me, it's just a vibe setter for a meal.
Yeah.
Even, you know, you don't have to drink, you have to at least go to the bar with me.
Like, it's just like— Get a water, get a soda, something.
If like, I'm gonna go, you wanna go get a drink? It's like, this is like the opening question of like, is this going to be a fun dinner? You gotta just say yes. Drink it, even if you—
even if you—
I was about to say something bad.
Oh boy.
Drink the—
ask for Soda on the rocks. Yeah, just pretend.
Fake it.
Yeah, fake it.
Yeah.
As well.
Oh, I'm sorry, Juju. Go.
No, no, Dave, please go ahead. Dave, after you, sir.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Keep doing this the whole show.
Put your hand on your mouth.
The worst question. The worst first question to ask. When they ask me, they'd be like, so LeBron to the Sixers, eh? I'm like, oh my God.
Yeah, that's, that's where you can tell how awkward I am. If I go to sports quick, that's when I'm feeling awkward.
He's in trouble.
He's really—
I do this with a lot of people at my daughter's school. I'm in that like 10-minute— I'm like signing her out, waiting, and like there's a few people there that I have little comfort and they know what I do. So it's just like I go straight, I'm like, how about those Dolphins, huh? Like, because it's like, what else are we gonna like— it's just such an easy—
I mean, if I'm, if I'm in a situation like that and the first question to me is, is sports related, like, it's like, oh, this is my nightmare. I mean, I gotta get out of this.
Just reheat Zazzle 2.0 from that day and just give him all the takes for 30 minutes.
I just spent 5 hours today talking about this stuff and now I gotta explain it to you. You know, like, no.
What do you think of Amos Kanter?
It's a nightmare for me.
Oh my God. Mika Bayo has a great idea though. You should just, if they ask you a sports question, just take out the latest episode of, uh, of the Zazz Show and hit play. That would be great.
And just, that would be great.
These are my thoughts.
That would be great.
I could scroll forward if you like to hear college football thoughts.
That would be— that's right.
But I want a personal show. Give it to me.
Well, well, it's not even that people want a personal show. They don't even care what you— the question that they asked you, they don't even care what you're gonna say. They want to give you their opinion. That's what they care about.
That's how people are with their kids. Like, oh yeah, my kid had trouble sleeping last night, and then the other person isn't listening to you anymore. They are just going to tell you about their kid's Yes. Like, I'm not listening, I'm done. You mentioned sleeping, so now I have my thoughts on my kids' sleep. So like, once you're done talking, I'm just gonna tell you my kids' situation.
But it's especially true with— you're talking to someone who's in sports, you think that they want to talk to you because you, you're an expert. No, that is not it at all. They want to give you their opinion. They're— they've been sitting on this hot take and now they could tell it to somebody who actually like has some type of authority. in sports. Yeah, no, that's what it's about.
Like, if you're gonna be like, you know what, you should co-host a show with me, right?
That's what they're hoping. That take was so good. Zaslav and Gregg Show 2.0. They're about to get their big break. They want to give you— and they're gonna blow my mind with how amazing this take was. And the next thing you knew, I'm— no, I'm changing the name of Zaslav Show 2.0. It's their name. That's what's happening. It's true. That's what it is. So let's talk a little bit about last night. Thursday Night Football. The Browns beat the Steelers. Uh, before we get to Dave, who is certainly upset about the Steelers losing to Cleveland, but I think we start with the positive side, which is the Cleveland Browns, who look like a legitimate team, right? Kind of?
Yes?
Defense looks good.
Right? Defense looks good, and they're getting totally acceptable quarterback play, and I'll tell ya, That offensive line, they're blocking the shit out of people because all these short passes, screen passes, I guess, I don't know, maybe it's the plays that are being drawn up. These, these are great plays. They were getting big-time blocking, big-time yards. I thought, you know, they went out to a 21-7 lead. They end up winning on a field goal with like a minute left. I, I thought the Browns looked terrific last night, and I, I'll even say I was pretty happy for the Cleveland fans. I felt good for them. You know, they, they, they, you know, look, it's a horrible sports city, all right, as far as the, the success of the teams, especially when it comes to the Browns. And I, I, I felt good for them last night, Dave. I, I know you're not going to feel good for them because you're upset about the Steelers, but the Browns might be a legitimate team, and, and, and maybe they got a legitimate coach too.
I'm not, uh, I don't know if that I would say I'm, I'm happy for Cleveland, but sure, I can appreciate a, a turnaround for a long-suffering fan base and all of that. It's obviously complicated by who their quarterback is. And the bizarre element of Amazon feeling required to shill for him, apparently. I don't know who imposed that on them legitimately, if the NFL as their partner gets in their ear and say, do your best to spin this in the positive. It's not a good look for the league if you denounce the starting quarterback of one half of this game.
Did you think it was weird that throughout the broadcast when You know, like specifically Al Michaels and Kirk Herbstreit are talking about how, you know, uh, uh, off the court distractions, troubles like that. I don't think they ever mentioned what they were.
Oh no, they never mentioned those. But what they did talk about, and Kirk used the word guts, as in it took guts for the Cleveland Browns not to cut Deshaun Watson after that press conference.
Huh?
They're to be hailed They're to be backslapped, embraced for the guts that it took. We're using the word guts, Kirk, in reference to not cutting this scumbag who they can't get out from under financially, so they have nowhere to go on their own past mistake. It took guts to do that. Ridiculous. Okay, you have to get— if you're trying to have a 3.5-hour, 4-hour football-based conversation, you have to move on from that. I get that they're in a tough spot, Al. And Kirk are. But as far as the football goes, yeah, they're talented. And do keep in mind, Mika Biyo, Tony just mentioned the defense is good. They didn't have Mason Graham for just about the whole game either. That's their, what, one, their first, second, third best defensive piece out there. One of the young talented guys that they have out there, he wasn't out there and they still took care of the line of scrimmage pretty much the entire night. It was an embarrassment from the Steelers side.
Were you embarrassed with Aaron Rodgers' behavior last night?
Shouting at McCarthy? I mean, it's par for the course.
So this was picked up by the, by the microphones last night. If I could play the clip here, you'll, you'll be able to hear, as I guess the play is taking too long to get into Aaron Rodgers. He's not too pleased. He did this a lot against Cincinnati last week, kind of looking over to the bench like, yeah, call it.
Yeah, he's not happy.
And you hear him there and you could see him. He's super animated and pissed. And he says, you know, bleeping call it.
And then a perfect cut by Amazon to Mike McCarthy.
Right. And McCarthy, you could read his lips and he says, what an effing a-hole. I mean, this was, this was part of the concern, right? When they either hired McCarthy or when they brought Aaron Rodgers back for another year because their relationship didn't end well. in Green Bay. That was a little bit tumultuous in the end there. And I think it also shows you, you didn't get any of this, including interviews throughout the week, be it if it's McAfee or Bussin' with the Boys, or Aaron Rodgers is going on whatever shows he wants and speaking. Rodgers seems to have had a much greater deal of respect for Tomlin. than he does for Mike McCarthy. Like, that's how it comes off to me, Dave.
I mean, you know, I'm a broken record on the subject, which is, you know, how many times do vampire movies have to teach you the lesson that you don't invite the vampire into your building purposely? That's exactly what they did. And then they brought the vampire back in the building after last year's mediocre to disappointing performance to bring in that 43-year-old man that advances the franchise. Not at all. And the most disconcerting thing from the Steelers side of things is, did they really believe that Aaron Rodgers was going to be— well, they're in a tough spot. We have Cam Hayward, we have TJ Watt, our tenured veterans. We want to take our best swing at this thing to try and to get to a Super Bowl on their behalf. Did they really think Aaron Rodgers was going to do that, was capable of doing that? Because it's laughable if they didn't. And in the meantime, their decision-making with running out. As we talk about Mason Graham on the Browns, the Steelers now have a pattern of running or allowing talented young players out of the building and moving them on, as they just did with Joey Porter Jr.
It's ridiculous, and it certainly does not comport with a team that considers itself a Super Bowl contender.
Yeah, and he had one last week as well with, uh, Michael Pittman, right? When he dropped the pass and he was like, that guy.
Yep.
It's like, how is this behavior just going to be expected? Or can somebody at least say, bro, like, if I'm Mike McCarthy, timeout. Come here, bro. Who are you talking to? Like, what are we doing, man?
He is not afraid to show a lack of respect for his coach when he doesn't respect his coach. You know, remember, it was a couple of years ago it happened with Saleh as well, right? Where he Forget about, you know, the back and forth in the media, but wasn't it with Robert Saleh where he like hugged him after a big play, or one of the coaches hugged him after a big play, and he pushed him off? He didn't like it. Am I remembering this correctly?
I remember one of his players like tackled him to the ground after a big play.
Well, maybe that's what it was.
No, both of those things happened. Those were 2 separate occasions.
Yeah, it really seems like over the last few years the only person he respects is Mike Tomlin, and everyone else— I mean, he was a big Minecraft fan, I don't know— and then everyone else, he, uh, yeah, he's, he's Kind of an a-hole too. Dave?
At 5'7¾ at guard, from Santa Fe Community College, Jonathan Zaslow. Yeah!
You wouldn't ask an offensive lineman to play wide receiver. You need the right person and the right equipment for the job. That applies to football, and it definitely applies below the waist. That's where the Lawn Mower lineup from Manscaped comes in. Trusted by over 14 million men worldwide. The Lawn Mower Go is slim, sporty, and straightforward. Or if you like your grooming tools fully loaded, there's the all-new Lawn Mower Ultra Gen 6, engineered with a premium alloy body. Both are waterproof for easy cleanup and feature SkinSafe technology to help reduce nicks and cuts, because that is one injury nobody wants to explain. Find Manscaped and the Lawn Mower lineup today at Target and CVS.
"I wake up with these pipes."
The new voice of the Miami Heat, Gale Sayers Nelson, joins us in the studio and gives Zaslow the introduction he deserves. Nelson tells us how he plans to follow in the footsteps of the legendary Michael Biamonte, what traditions are sticking around, and how he plans to differentiate himself from such a giant of the game. Plus, it's time for another edition of Big Game or Not a Big Game, and Dave breaks down his Pittsburgh Steelers' disheartening loss to the Cleveland Browns, who may or may not be a legitimate football team.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices