Transcript of Jessica and Dave Take a Trip To the Shire | Hour 1 New

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We bring in Jessica Smetana. So why don't I— why don't I turn into Zazz now? Jessica Smetana.

It's infectious.

Big doings in the WNBA playoffs. We got 2 closeout games tonight, but I want to go back to game 2 of Liberty versus Dream and the timeout situation. Juju wanted to fire Chris DeMarco, my good friend Chris DeMarco. I said, hey, that's going too far, because again, if I ask the ref and the ref says I don't have timeouts, why am I supposed to defy that order and go call a timeout?

I mean, this is such a classic officiating cluster F in the WNBA. So if you want If you weren't watching Game 2, the Liberty are down a possession while Angel Reese is shooting free throws. She makes both free throws. There's 4 seconds left in overtime.

Mm-hmm.

Important to note, overtime. So the timeouts are different. There's 2 team timeouts and 1 reset timeout in overtime. Chris DiMarco, who's the head coach of the Liberty, who are now down a possession, has never coached in the WNBA before. One of the big criticisms about his hire was that this was his first head coaching gig, and he was coming into a team that was in win-now mode with Breanna Stewart. Go ahead, Amin.

His first head coaching gig on the pro side. He is the head coach of the Bahamian national team.

Yes, in the WNBA. First WNBA head coaching gig, like in a league he's never coached in before. And that he brought in mostly a staff that was not very experienced either. So that has been lingering over the Liberty this whole season as they've been relatively inconsistent, not really playing up to the, to the standard of what fans were expecting of them this year because they let go of a championship-winning coach in Sandy Brondello at the end of last season to bring bring this guy in. And so people, you know, Liberty fans definitely on edge about this to begin with. So Brianna Stewart says in the postgame that the referees told her they did not have a reset timeout. And if you're watching the game live, Ryan Rucco and Rebecca Lobo are just having an absolute meltdown over the fact that Chris DiMarco is not calling the reset timeout. And so the Liberty don't get a clean shot off and the game ends, the dream win. And So in the postgame, Breanna Stewart's like, they told me we didn't have one. And in the pool report that came out over an hour later, Mm-hmm. the referees were like, well, that we didn't actually, we, no, we told her they had one.

That didn't happen. So contradicted a league MVP, like one of the leaders.

Mm-hmm.

In the WNBA. And Chris DiMargo, you know, backed up what Stewie said. And then of course fans went back and watched the broadcast and you can see her clearly asking the officials, do we have a reset? And them waving her off saying no. So the criticism of Chris DiMarco is that, A, you should either know the rules and fight the referees over this and be adamant that, you know, you have one, or you should have an assistant or someone who's keeping track of this.

They do.

And you shouldn't— and I'm sure they do. You should maybe go to the scorer's table. Don't inbound the ball until you have this figured out. Right. This is the last possession of the game. But I think the bigger issue here is that the entire game was officiated terribly. There were so many foul calls. in the first half. And it was absurd. Like, Ryan Howard, her 4th foul coming in the second quarter when she barely touched Sabrina. I don't— I mean, they replayed it 5 times. You can't see where the foul is. And then in the second half, the whistle stops. There's nothing. And then this happens at the very end. So this entire game was just absolutely— you know, if you watch WNBA games, you know this is an ongoing issue. But I think the real issue now is that you have this pool report that's contradicting what one of the most trustworthy stars in your league is saying happened. And that to me is just as big of a problem as the Liberty head coach not knowing whether or not he has a reset timeout.

I love the idea of saying, hey, they said you said that they didn't have any timeouts. Like, no, I didn't. And then, and it's like the scene from Role Models where we see the clip, who would, who would believe me, David Garvin, stealing TVs? Like, it's on camera, my man. Like, that you can't, right, you can't fudge your way around.

He's like, how do you know that's me?

And then they cut to the audio. Yeah, me, look at me. Yeah, he's bald. Like, it could be any bald guy. But just zooming out here a little bit, you've got the Dreamer up 2-0 in their series against Celebrity. You got the Valkyrie up 2-0 in their series against the Aces. And I'm wondering, because I'm not as day-to-day like you, I kind of zoom in and out of all this, but how shocking is it that we're on the precipice of one team that's been awful for a few years now and one team that's only been alive for a few years now Beating, beating like the, the establishment. One team, yes, 5-time MVP. The other team, you know, how, how far removed from winning is he?

Multiple MVPs.

Yeah.

So, so how shocking is this potential matchup?

I think it's pretty shocking, especially after just the first round of this year's playoffs where the Fever had the best offense in the WNBA this season. And then they go up against this experienced Las Vegas Aces team and they get shut down in 3 games. And, you know, they had a really good game 2 at Gainbridge Fieldhouse, but the Aces were totally in control. And now The Aces are kind of on their heels playing against the Valkyries because frankly, I think that they just don't have the bodies. They don't have the depth anymore to compete with the Valkyries because they have so many players that are able to sub into their games and contribute. And they have an incredible coach in Natalie Nakase, who, you know, we saw Todd Bowles fall to his knees at the end of the Bucks game last night. And it kind of reminded me of when she was like passed out during the Valkyries game last week and then got back up on her feet like nothing happened. And she's just apparently been described as a basketball sicko. And the Valkyries have done a really good job of having an identity in the WNBA after only 2 years of their existence.

So yeah, it's pretty surprising. The Liberty side of it is, I guess, like both games have been close. Game 1, I guess less so against the Dream, but they were just a really bad matchup for the Lynx who were the number 1 seed because of how tall they are, how long they are, how good they are defensively, and how much experience they have. But this, I could see this dream series dragging out a couple more games because they have been close. And I think that, you know, the Liberty do have that veteran experience. They do have slightly more legs than the Aces do, I guess. I would be surprised if both games were sweeps tonight, given who are on the, you know, the 0 side of the 2-0 leads, I guess. But yeah, it's pretty, it's pretty surprising. Like Atlanta's story this season has been, has been really fascinating to watch after they traded for Angel Reese and she won Defensive Defensive Player of the Year, and they have been just a really strong defensive team. Ryan Howard leads the league in steals. It's just a crazy, crazy story for both of those teams to be on the precipice of a Finals.

Every WNBA conversation reminds me that the WNBA has the worst collection of team names in the history of people. I mean, it is the worst collection.

What? No, I—

Valkyries, Dream, Fever. A team's named after sickness. Quick turn to college football, Jess. You hate the USC Trojans.

Okay.

Did I allow for a rebuttal?

That's expertly done, David Amashek.

If Jess would like to respond, I wanted to talk college football.

You didn't give her a chance to respond.

No, no. A team named after sickness. Pivot to college football. Shut the door behind you.

All right, listen, Jess, your response to my charge that the WNBA has an atrocious collection of team names?

I think Valkyries is a great name.

Me too.

What's wrong with Valkyries?

It tries too hard.

It's a logo. Tom Cruise's fake ass.

Oh man, what a movie.

Oh Jesus. I don't wanna talk about Tom Cruise.

Half the teams are singular.

Correct.

Which I've raised the grammatical conundrum. And you know, the Miami Heat, I think, are the first one to bring this plague upon us. Orlando Heat. But the favorite—

You be careful.

What about the Stanford Cardinal?

Probably started it all.

Touché, touché. Look whose brain is on Notre Dame football.

Never gets too far away.

I was worried. I liked— I like the Irish -39 with the hook in there. I know, 39.

The line keeps going up. I don't know what is going on over there at Stanford. They are just not a good football team this year. Mike could speak to that. Miami already played them and won 35-7.

Stanford's like the only P4 team that if they have 2 injuries, they're toast. They just have zero depth. depth. Like, anytime you're trying to like place a wager on Stanford, you have to look to see if a defensive lineman is out, because if they are, they're cooked.

Apparently they weren't out in the second half against Georgia Tech because it was amazing.

I cede my time to Dave Demaschke.

I don't know what, uh, what his name is. Pitt does not suffer from that problem. They've lost their Heisman-level quarterback Mason Heinshel. We don't skip a beat. The Pitt Panthers roll on. Oh, okay.

Are you taking the Panthers to cover tomorrow against the Tar Heels then at home?

Jess, I'm worried sick because, you know, the Doos era, he pulls off some big wins.

Yep.

I think a lot of people don't appreciate him on the banks of the Three Rivers. This is the kind of game that worries me sick. We're trying to get down to Miami to, to vanquish Mike Ryan's favorite team, the one that he wishes for his birthday. He'd rather see them win a national championship than he would see any concert in the history of people. Jess, what do you think about that? Just fandom.

Jess, Jess, would you rather see Notre Dame win the national title or have a time machine that apparently only can take you to a concert from any time in history one time?

But that means Notre Dame won't win.

Won't win for 10 years. Won't win for 10 years.

I'm not—

but you guys know I'm not like a music person, really. I mean, it's just—

it's a—

okay, you go get to stay a long weekend in the Shires.

But it is a great cocktail story. It'd be like, I saw Beethoven.

Say that again, Dave.

You get to go to the Shire.

Like the real Shire?

I— no, the Shire. You get to hang out with all the hobbits.

The photo.

Like, they're all gonna be hanging out there. It's built— in fact, you get to attend Bilbo Baggins' birthday party. How about that?

Oh my God, Bilbo's— his eleventy-first birthday?

That's right. It's sort of a lot— it's sort of like hanging out down on the field in South Bend with that, uh, with their version of a hobbit, right?

10 years, Jess!

That little guy running around out there.

10— wait, I get to live in the Shire for 10 years?

No, like 10 years before Notre Dame wins a championship.

I mean, she's used to the long wait.

Yeah, I mean, 10 years, okay. Like, I'll be 40. That's fine. Um, I—

I'm glad you're here, Sam.

That's Jessica's dad.

That was Bill Simmons. Was your Bill Simmons— yeah, that's not your Bill Simmons impression? They sound the same.

Elijah Wood. That's a really— this is very enticing, but I won't— I don't want to stay in the Shire. Can I go to Rivendell for a couple days?

Ooh, I like that. I like that.

Making me feel better about myself.

Let's answer the question.

All right, let's go to this. So is that a yes? I'm going to put you down as a yes. And I'm not— and I'm taking back my time from Dave Damashek.

Dan Levitar.

If I may say for a second, Miami, they were simulating the snap count the entire game and they were clapping at the line of scrimmage. And the only thing I want to see clapping are them cheeks on Mrs. Mack in my face, Mike Schur.

All right.

So that's one thing.

Jessica is Madonna.

They're a bunch of cheaters, Dan. And you know who should be cheating? Mrs. Met on Mr. Met, and he can watch if he wants.

This is the Dan Le Batard Show.

Jess, last week in terms of college football games, a rare dip in action. Not, not a really good marquee game there. This week, though, there's big-time games. And for all the, the people, the naysayers that say an expanded college football playoff means the regular season doesn't matter as much. We essentially have some play-in games this weekend. Georgia-Alabama, the winner of that game is going to be heavily favored to make the CFP. And a sneaky one is UCLA versus Oregon, because if UCLA wins that game, find 3 losses on that schedule. What say you about the upcoming weekend?

You missed Red River, which I think, you know, Texas is obviously a heavy favorite because Oklahoma's been so disappointing this year. But I still think that's going to be a real fun game to watch. Yeah, I think the, the really curious thing about the Alabama-Georgia game is that there is a hurricane barreling towards Alabama right now, which is, which is not ideal.

Did you see Ron DeSantis refuses to call it by its name because he doesn't like Isaiah? He's like, I'm just calling it Isaiah.

Wait, no, I did not see that.

Yeah. Like I've said before, and I'll say again, we really are missing the— a great opportunity. We should be naming our hurricanes after great football players. Hurricane DeBrickasha, Hurricane Dick, Hurricane Mean Joe. These are great names. I'm sorry, Jesper.

And that's okay. I'm really interested about Dave Damashek's Indiana Hoosiers this weekend at Nebraska, another Big Ten team that's 5-0. Sorry, Willow is really interested in this conversation too. Yeah, Mike, there's a number of really exciting games this weekend. The UCLA-Oregon game, I think, is interesting because Obviously, Dante Moore is still out, so Dylan Rayola is getting his first start with the Ducks, which will be interesting to see. UCLA has been an incredible running team. Like, their rush yard numbers are crazy. We went over this on my show with Lucy this week. But this is another game where it's like, I think, you know, Oregon's defense was a little disappointing to start the year, but if they are turning a corner and they're legit, this is going to be a really great game for them if they can shut down that run game and make UCLA a little bit more one-dimensional. I also, I'm really intrigued by some of the Big 12 matchups this weekend. There's a couple interesting Friday night games tonight. Florida State at Louisville. Louisville's been pretty disappointing the last few weeks, but they've lost a lot of close games. Whereas Florida State just beat the crap out of Virginia last weekend and like out of nowhere just absolutely destroyed them.

Iowa State at BYU is another game tonight that I think is kind of interesting because BYU's best player, their running back, is going going to be out for 4 to 6 weeks and they host Notre Dame next weekend. I think the Friday games are always a little bit weird and wonky. And Iowa State is, you know, they're not a great team. They're a 10-point underdog on the road, but they are feisty. They have a running back who rushed for over 200 yards.

Incredible.

And threw 2 touchdowns.

He's awesome, dude.

Yeah. Aidan Flora. So, and also Iowa plays at Washington tonight. I don't know how many.

I'll take the under on that one. I don't know.

So that's some vintage Big Ten West-West football tonight. But yeah, there's, there's tons of great games.

I agree with you, Jess, what you're hinting at there. Do not schedule— if you think you are relevant to the tournament, the postseason tournament conversation, do not schedule any Friday night games. Weird things happen in those. I am worried about the game that looks like a scrimmage in the Big Ten, the Hoosiers at Nebraska. Also, you could loop in Wisconsin into that. and it would— you would never be able to distinguish between the 3 teams based on their uniforms. But the game that intrigues me, you hate USC, I hate Penn State. Which team, which team is spiraling even further with a loss in this one? I mean, that's a, that's a fascinating one with Lincoln Riley and Matt Campbell both in a real bad spot. It's getting dark early for one of those 2 guys.

It's getting dark early for sure. And last Thursday night, as Pitt was blowing the game against Virginia Tech, which they did end up winning because of the field goal that was definitely not good. Definitely not good.

Don't do that. Don't be a weirdo. That was obviously good.

I'll send you some angles, Dave. There was a moment where I thought to myself, the state of Pennsylvania is so down bad right now with football. No one knows how to tackle. We have lost the recipes to tackling in football games in this state. The Penn State situation is not great. I've seen that. ticket sales for the Whiteout game, which is, you know, obviously the big game of the year, usually costs a fortune to go to. They're dropping precipitously. And it's definitely a game where, you know, I think I mentioned like factory of sadness games a few weeks ago with USC and Oregon being one of them. This is another USC game where there's been more hot seat conversations about Lincoln Riley. He's obviously been terrible in the Eastern time zone on the road in the Big Ten, even in a shootout against Rutgers like 3 weeks ago. Whereas Matt Campbell is— all of the things he said after Penn State losses have been the wrong things, right? Like blowing the lead to Wisconsin and admitting that that was, you know, he called the game differently to manage the lead. Just not what you want to hear from a head coach.

I didn't really think Penn State was going to be that great this year to begin with, but they did have one of the easier Big Ten schedules that they could have asked for. So I think it's been disappointing in that sense. But again, like we talked about with With Oregon and USC, it's like stoppable force, movable object. With USC, their defense is again so bad. I mean, if you watched the Washington game last weekend, the tackling was terrible. They did make a stop at the end of the game, which I think speaks just as much to Washington's offense as it does to USC's defense. But just been so bad in these road Big Ten games. And Penn State has just been so underwhelming this season. Rocco Becht was really not great against Northwestern last weekend. So that's definitely a disgusting game. And I like that. But the sportsbooks are like, yeah, well, we'll give Penn State a point here. We can't— we can't project what is going to happen in this one because the advanced statistic models still like Penn State. Like, they still are pretty high up in a lot of the, like, advanced efficiency data and indexes.

But the product on the field has still looked so bad. And USC, still great offense, terrible defense. How do you measure for that? So, yeah, it's going to be disgusting.

Imagine when they— when USC joins the Big Ten, the fantasy, the matchups that we'll get to look at. Penn State hosting USC. This is not what they— it's like, let's say that you get this question wrong, Jess.

Yeah.

That means that you have to sleep on top of that tower like Gandalf did.

Oh no.

For one night at least of your life. You have to spend it, you know what I'm talking about?

Isengard. Yeah.

So, right. Sauron puts his friend up there, but they jump.

Saruman.

Eagle, right?

I, I don't want to get sidetracked with the jumping onto the eagle flying away. But anyway, you get to choose one. Which will win the national championship this year? The Big Ten, the SEC, the ACC, or Notre Dame? Actually, let's take Notre Dame out because you'll take that. One of those 3 conferences is going to win the national title. Which one is it?

Hard to pick against the Big Ten, but I think if you lump Notre Dame in with the ACC, I'll take my bet on Miami or Notre Dame.

I think Miami is a better team over the SEC or the Big Ten.

I agree. You know what? I would just about bet Miami, period, against the SEC this year.

Yeah. I mean, I think— I honestly do think Alabama has been really impressive to start the year. They've been scoring so many points. Their quarterback looks really good. I do think it's to the point in the national conversation, though, where now it feels like Georgia's a little underrated. I don't know if you would agree with me there. Georgia.

Well, can I ask you about that game?

it.

And I have all sorts of questions about the SEC. I think whoever comes out at the top end at the end of the season is going to be a problem. I think Texas has such great high-end talent, but for whatever reason, their games are kind of weird and they never fully put it together. It might be just the head coach.

Yeah.

But Alabama looks incredible this season. Great quarterback. Running game finally looking better. They were terrible last year. And Georgia, Stockton continues to improve and their defense looks formidable. But Georgia's defense has not played a good offense and Alabama's offense has not played a good defense. We're going to figure out a lot in this game, huh?

Yeah, totally, Mike. I think that the criticism of Georgia over the last few years has been like the lack of explosive plays and they've been better in that regard this year. But also, yeah, you're right. They haven't played any incredibly high top-end defensive talent. They're not playing Texas in the regular season. The rest of Georgia's schedule is actually I think that's probably not terrible if you consider that Ole Miss's defense has looked pretty bad this year. I do think Missouri has— I know you guys are disappointed to hear— has been pretty impressive so far this year. At least they were last weekend against—

We're taking the Aggies +3.5. Thank you very much.

Yeah, I know. I, I am excited to see that game too. But I think, you know, but Austin Simmons has been definitely better than Marcel Reid.

No, he had some passes in that last game, Jess, that were like, all right, now I see why he was Ole Miss's starter last year.

Yeah, and they have good receivers, and Texas A&M's been a little banged up on offense, and their defense has been a little disappointing. But I hear you on that one. Yeah, I think that this Alabama-Georgia game is going to be awesome in that regard. And I think that what I mean about Georgia being a little underrated now is that Gunnar Stockton is a quarterback that's now had a lot of experience and a lot of playoff experience. And what Keelan Russell is going to have to play against is something that he probably hasn't experienced yet this season. And that's a really aggressive Georgia team that puts a lot of pressure on you and tries to pressure you to make the wrong decisions. Whereas Gunnar Stockton has, has faced that before. And so in a game where it might come down to a few plays, and it might come down to like gross weather and managing the game and field position and not giving up a big turnover, I do think Georgia's just got a little bit more there. But if you— if it does come down to who can make a few big explosive plays. I think Alabama's done that so far this season in a way that's been really exciting and harkens back to teams of years past.

I mean, even not that far back, like 2024, when they played Georgia and got up to the big lead. And then, you know, Georgia came back and then they won on an incredible play. But yeah, I'm excited to see this game. I do kind of wish there wasn't a hurricane because the weather situation might make it a little bit less exciting than it would have been. But either way, you know, neither team, like I said, has to play Texas this season, who's the other team at the top of the SEC right now. And if you think those are definitely the 3 best SEC teams and the most likely to get in the playoff, then this could set up a really interesting SEC championship game.

So in my Miami Hurricanes chat, someone put in a video of Lucy and she was taking shots at the ACC and I was like, all right, let me get mad at this. And then points were made and I agreed with all of them. But I do think that the SEC is a lot like the ACC in terms of that middle pack and bottom pack, but they, they've got the branding there. But if there is a second good team in the ACC, I— from what I've heard from Miami staffers after that, uh, that Wake Forest game, by the way, I mean, Miami glazed Wake Forest pretty good. And for their head coach to say like, we out-physicaled them, it's like, what are you doing, pal? Uh, but Wake Forest I think is legit good. That being said, And that being said, they're susceptible to the obvious ACC loss, right? This conference just can't ever get marquee. Any results that could help the conference in terms of national perception, the ACC always do the wrong thing.

That's part of the problem. I think part of the problem is like, you know, you have your Louisville who's a top 40 team, but they lose in the most like pitiful ways imaginable. They're, you know, one of the worst teams in penalties. They turn the ball over. They just do a lot of stupid things. I believe, still ranked, but they have looked pretty shaky this year and also are extremely turnover-prone. Wake Forest, like you said, yeah, they're like top 40 right now in FEI. Florida State is even up there. They have not been terrible this year. And that game against SMU with the power outage at the beginning of the year could have had more far-reaching implications on the ACC title race than any of us thought at the time. Clemson obviously looks terrible, Mike. You saw that in person over the weekend.

Yeah, but their schedule is super light the rest of the way. Like, they can absolutely win the rest of the rest of their games. And you mentioned SMU. I'm with you. They're down compared to years previous, but Rhett Lashley and SMU just find a way to win the ACC games that all the other teams find ways to lose.

Right. That's true. I mean, that's my point about Louisville. Like, they should also be one of those teams that has a little bit of an edge, but they just lose a lot of stupid games close. But yeah, I agree. Wake Forest, their offense has been really fun to watch this year. I think one of the other like—

Oh, somebody's at the door.

One of— what's happening?

Someone's at the door.

Who's at the door?

You're forgetting somebody, aren't you? Just because their quarterback got hurt doesn't mean they're not undefeated and ranked. You're talking about Wake Forest. Come on.

I mean, I think I would, I would feel a lot better about Pitt if they beat North Carolina, uh, by double digits this weekend and their backup quarterback looked awesome. If that happens, I will— I'm not trying to write them off just because the quarterback got hurt, but a big reason why they were so good to start the year was because they had a good quarterback. That is the most important position for a reason.

They basically had a nice TV window to themselves to showcase, and it was a 12-7 game against UCF. Oh, shut up.

Awful.

Well, the weather—

that weather though, that weather, that weather changed everything.

Enough.

Us, us Big 12 folk, we don't like that weather.

Shut up.

I'll also say UCF's defense— that's not Willow, by the way.

That's a good defense.

UCF's defense has actually been—

Yeah, you know about that defense?

No, that's not Willow.

That's the second dog.

No, it's different dog.

It's— I don't know who it is. Um, but yeah, my third— I think part of it is that like Georgia Tech's been a really solid, uh, like upper-tier ACC team over the last few years. They are, they are awful this year. I think the only ACC team that's lost to Stanford. Duke is also undefeated, but again, like Like they beat a pretty terrible Illinois team. They beat Stanford. They beat Tulane, who has not been good this year either. So there's just a lot of like not really exciting teams in the middle of the ACC unless SMU. And again, like they, they just love turning the ball over really and keeping, keeping games close. But unless SMU does go on a run like you said, and they also play Notre Dame this year, that's probably the second best team Notre Dame plays from the ACC behind Miami. So, um, they could definitely go on a run. They could be a, you know, 10-win team, 11-win team. Um, but yeah, it's just there's not that much excitement right now in that middle level, especially if you have a Pitt team with a starting quarterback who's out for the season.

I'll tell you where the excitement is. It's with that dog. By the way, I just have to— I have to apologize. I used to give Willow a hard time. Willow, not that bad of a dog compared to Ethan's dumbass dog that tries to step up and get on the counter and eat food and stuff.

Tries to eat everything.

Like, I'm like, yo, and the dog doesn't pick up on hints. Willow at least at some point realized, yo, I'm gonna stay away from him.

Willow's a smart dog.

No, this dog keeps coming up to me like, hey, we're friends, right? No, we're not, stupid-ass dog. All right, you can catch Jess on College Football Happy Hour with Lucy Roldan and also her weekly Notre Dame podcast, The Echo. with Mike Golubczak Jr. Thanks, Jess. Go handle that dog.

Hurricane Bilbo.

Hurricane Bilbo.

He said Bilbo.

Oh man.

Down Levitar.

No one wants—

PJ.

Dave Demacek.

That's pretty good. This is the Down Levitar Show.

What's wrong with you, Dave Davidson? What do you mean, what's wrong with me? What's your issue?

What's your problem?

Just treetop view, what's wrong with you?

Yeah, I don't have enough time to list all the things, so I just want you to give me one kind of catch-all.

I do have to get into a cozy position because this is going to take a while. What's wrong with me? You see, in kindergarten—

I was actually— I was actually—

I was waiting for you to say, let go.

I was like, wow, this is gonna be an iconic yes and. He's gonna go for 2 hours. I couldn't— I can't believe that's the first time that he ever— Here's what happened.

Here's what happened to me for real. I, I was loved too much as a child. I was told by my mother This is the thing. If you are— if you have bad parents who don't take care of you and don't give you some self-esteem, you can wind up in the same spot where I am. My mother told me, you're great, you can do anything. And then I opened the front door and I went out into the world and found it very different from what she had explained. And I felt betrayed by the world. And in the same way, at the same time, the Pittsburgh Steelers are the greatest football team known to man. Their arch rival, the Dallas Cowboys, when they get on the big stage against them, the Steelers always come out on top. You understand, as a young child rooting for and identifying with the local football collective, how my self-esteem was soaring. But then the '80s started, and then the Steelers fell on their face, and again I felt betrayed by the world. What? This football league? My team doesn't always win it in the end? And this has landed me where I am, with a complicated sense of self.

This is— first of all, that's an amazing answer.

Bravo. Yes, it's a great answer.

Awesome.

I didn't think the Steelers-Cowboys would be invoked, but Greg.

All right, so speaking of the Cowboys, they lost last night in embarrassing fashion.

Yeah.

And this gives me pleasure and joy.

Tried to tell people, my buddy TA, I tried to tell you, number 32 ranked passing offense versus number 32 ranked pass defense. Klev Analytics, once again, these game notes are good.

The movable object versus the stoppable force. I don't know which one won last night, but But watching it and deriving joy from that, and it got me to thinking, if I say the Dallas Cowboys, who's a team that people love to see in misery more than the Dallas Cowboys? I had no dog in the race yesterday, but I just like watching them lose.

I would have said Knicks before this recent run.

College rivals.

No, no, no, I want the most universal, generally.

No, no, no, no.

Generally, like the population at large.

The universal, everyone hates the Cowboys other than Cowboys fans.

Yankees.

up there.

Notre Dame is up there.

Yankees.

Yankees for sure.

Do people get joy out of—

I mean, they stink so much over the last 2 decades now that it's not the same as it was.

But if you would have come to me—

Dodgers.

Right now it's the Dodgers.

Like, if you would have come to me in 2011 when they had still recently been to a World Series and were coming off of winning all of the other ones, it would have been the Yankees.

See, this is why the Cowboys are so special.

Yeah, Cowboys are top of the heap.

It has nothing to do with how good or bad they are.

Right.

It's just I like seeing—

People still like seeing the Yankees lose.

Blues.

Not like—

because of what they represent.

Well, yeah, I guess, but like, I feel like it's— that feeling's not there as much anymore.

In New York.

Mm-hmm.

Roy set off my Toronto Maple Leafs.

I think that's a great one, Mike. The people of Canada— I don't think people in the US know this, but the Leafs are hated outside of Toronto. People— it's really weird how much the rest of that entire country hates that team.

Great point by me.

I think you're right.

Obviously the Dodgers, any team that's at the top of the pile, people are going to dislike. Like, but the Yankees are eternally hated. And I got to tell you another one that really— the Miami Hurricanes of recent vintage. Obviously the old dogs like Notre Dame are hated and everything else, but the Lakers are in that conversation too. People really dislike that brand, and people also dislike the Celtics brand.

The Germans?

Um, or the country they moved to. Argentina.

Oh yeah, Soviet Union.

Yeah, Argentina. Column A, column B. I think I Yeah, I enjoy watching Argentina lose more than I watch the Cowboys lose. I'll watch the Cowboys win 3 Super Bowls in a row again before I want to watch Argentina ever be good again.

Amin's the type of hater that I think gets more happy when the team he hates loses than when his team wins.

Oh no, I'm telling you, if Brazil wins, like, that's euphoria.

Are there any—

I just haven't seen it, I guess.

Are there any people like in the individual sports that falls into this category? Like tennis players, golfers? I'm trying, I can't think of any.

Yeah, Manu, a lot, a lot of people don't like Joker. A lot of people don't like Joker. I mean, he has a lot of fans, but the people who don't like him are massive.

Yeah, Sinner's got a lot of hate now.

Sinner, yeah. Well, what's the deal with him, man?

What's really— Someone needs to find out, right, what's going on.

So yeah, a certain someone.

Is Bryson DeChambeau that of golf?

Yeah, he's up there.

Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. No, the Sinner's thing, because we're talking about this, is Sinner— this is the conspiracy theory— Sinner is serving a shadow ban right now. That's why he's at all these tournaments. Because you guys remember, what was it, was the Australian Open where he took something and it was—

He did serve a formal one, but there is a notion like he's disappeared.

Yeah.

And people are— yeah, people are assuming that there's some sort of shadow ban.

You know who's worked their way into the conversation recently through Deez? or misdeed is Michigan. Michigan, obviously the Jim Harbaugh thing.

Great pullback.

And then the way their coach goes out at the end of last year and all that melodrama. And now the cardinal sin for just football fans level is, as I said, whenever it went down against Western Michigan 3, 4 weeks ago, the best thing they could have done was to get— for Whittingham to go to the microphone and be like, we're vacating that win. win. We saw what everybody else saw. We know we didn't win that game, and we would be on their side now. You would say they are the righteous team. Instead, they said, well, whatever, it's a win, we're counting it. And now everybody celebrated when Iowa knocked them off, and that's not going to be enough. People will continue to be delighted to see Michigan lose because of that win against Western Michigan.

See, I think the interesting thing is all the other candidates that you guys have other than Argentina, they're all rooted in a very specific thing. Like, Michigan cheated, that's why we root against them. The Yankees were good for too long, that's why. The Dodgers have so much money.

That was the Yankees too, by the way. It wasn't just that they were good, it was the George Steinbrenner, like, we have more money than you and fuck you for not having as much money as us. And that was happening in New York, and that's why the LA dynamic of the Dodgers as well well. And but, but to your point, like the Patriots, that was a huge one for a long time. And it was the combination of success and cheating where you had championships where everybody had to like sort of respect how good they were. But in the midst of all of it, there were all of these other cheating scandals that existed and a murderer. And so because of all of that, you had a situation where it was like, oh no, wait, like we don't like that team. I want to see them lose.

A new one that has invited dislike from most people Well, you guys aren't gonna like it. It's the Florida Panthers. They have the 2 cups. So some success, success brings that on you. But their manner of play and their head coach apologizing for being a— for winning via brute force, much like the Flyers did in the mid-'70s, Broad Street Bullies. They are the modern version of that. They have announced, we intend to kick the shit out of whoever we play physically.

Yep.

And the Tkachuk brothers, for all the celebrating that you guys have done You know, they're kind of, they're kind of prickos, uh, uh, the two of them. And then also the Florida thing that they are taking away all the Canadian farm boys who no longer want to play for Canadian teams and instead want to live down in South Beach. People are resentful of that. It all adds up to people—

But like, we're trying to play this game with Amin, and there's no other example except the Cowboys. Every other example just falls back to something winning related.

Something specific, like winning or money.

It's the Cowboys. Cowboys are the only team. I actually do think, Jeremy, I think the Yankees would be second place here in terms of just like, doesn't matter if they've won recently or not. People, if you're not a Yankees fan, just kind of root against them because they're still like, they have not won a World Series in a long time.

I know, like it's been a while. And so the fact that there are still major Yankee haters, like especially I know despite your amazing baseball acumen and memory that we heard about yesterday, I know you're not quite as tapped into baseball fandom circles. Baseball fans were ecstatic to see the Yankees swept at Yankee Stadium.

I went to, I went to Game 1 of the World Series in '24, and everyone was like, you're going dressed like that to Chavez Ravine? And I'm like, yeah. And I was so ready for like, oh, we're gonna have some shit talk. And it couldn't have been more—

Dodgers are bad fans. They've got bad fans.

It was, it was—

Like, they got good fans. You can go to a game wearing another team's jersey.

Very hard, right? Dog, they were telling me, they were telling me like I was going into like a lion's den wearing a meat—

Only like international soccer or like Premier League games. Yeah, that way you have to worry about wearing stuff.

Like in America, it was a hype.

You could go places, you can go to a game wearing the opposing team and it was killing.

Yeah, but it wasn't even trash talk. It was just like very pleasant. Everyone had a good time.

They knew they were gonna beat you.

No, that was the game Freddie Freeman crushed that shit. Oh God, that was so awesome.

Happy Halloween.

Man, let me tell you something. I still have the video on my phone. He gets up to bat, you know, one more out, we just stole game 1. He hit it and I literally, my video doesn't even follow the ball. It just goes down because the sound of the bat, I knew this thing's outta here.

My friend Kevin Hench said after the Yankees got swept, and he is a diehard Red Sox guy, he said, and he's on that fancy Boston sports fan group chain, and they celebrated the Yankees losing Who cares about the Red Sox? All is right in the world so long as the Yankees lose too. I prefer that, an arch rival and the legit hate versus the apathy that I feel. The thing, the teams I resent most, the fan bases I resent most are the ones that don't seem to care as much. I do love to hate other entire sports towns more than I do to kind of look at a team and be like, Tampa won the title? Eh, feels like the whole season counts for about half now. That's a great one, Mike.