Transcript of Matthew Berry Missed a Private Prince Concert? | Hour 2 New

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You are listening to the Dan Levitan Show in partnership with the DraftKings Sports App, now live in all 50 We welcome in now the one, the only, Matthew Berry.

He's the founder of fantasylife.com and the host of Fantasy Football Happy Hour with Matthew Berry on Odyssey. And he's the host of the new show, Pregame with Matthew Berry. You can catch that on the Roku channel. And just a reminder, folks, these fantasy picks are delivered by Little Caesars, the official pizza sponsor of the NFL. Right now, score 2 faves just for you with Detroit-style slices and sticks for just $4.99. That sounds like a typo. $4.99? Are you kidding me? Only at Little Caesars. Officially delicious. Hit the music!

Matthew Perry. Matthew Perry.

Matthew Perry.

Matthew Perry!

What's up, gentlemen? How are you?

What up? Hey, Matthew.

I'm good. Shall we dive in?

I'm gonna dive right in.

Do it. So far this season, every single quarterback that's faced the Detroit Lions has scored at least 21 fantasy points. They also give up over 300 passing yards per game and almost 3 passing touchdowns per game as well. Jacoby Brissett is available in over 50% of pretty much every league wherever you ever play. He's my favorite streamer. He's a top 10 play for me this week. Through 4 weeks, only 1 team in the NFL has a higher pass rate over expectation. than the Pittsburgh Steelers, than Dave Daboll's Pittsburgh Steelers. Through 4 weeks, by the way, Aaron Rodgers 7th in pass attempts per game. This week, Rodgers and the Steelers face the Colts and their 29th-ranked pass defense. Colts, by the way, top 7 in the NFL in terms of most usage of COVID 1 and cover 3. Rodgers threw almost 250 passing yards against those coverages last week, despite completing basically half of his passes. Over the past 2 games, Kyren Williams has seen a 76% snap rate. He's outtouched Blake Corum, uh, 47 to 14. And so far this year, 37% of Kyren Williams' yards from scrimmage have been on receptions. I bring that up because through 4 games, the Bills have allowed 3 receiving touchdowns to opposing running backs and give up an average of 5 receptions for 40 yards to opposing running backs.

In the 3 games since Jordan Mason was placed on IR, Aaron Jones— free Aaron Jones— is averaging 23, uh, touches a game, an 18% target share. He's number— he's a running back 7 in utilization score. That's a proprietary metric that we have on fantasylife.com that ranks basically all the underlying metrics of usage that project into future fantasy production. It's worth noting that they play the Saints. And did you see what the Falcons did to the Saints run defense last week?

Yes.

In week 4 against Chicago, Braelon Allen had a 94% snap rate. He had a 13% target share. He saw 100% of the Jets running back touches. Braelon Allen literally touched the ball on half of every offensive play for the Jets. I think he'll do better this week against the Browns than he did last week, just because I think they'll hold the ball longer. So far this year, the Jacksonville Jaguars have allowed only 190 total rushing yards to opposing running backs. However, they've also allowed 193 receiving yards to opposing running backs. That's the 2nd most in the NFL. They've also allowed the 2nd most receptions to opposing running backs. I think it's gonna be hard to run on the Jaguars, but I think you can throw to the running backs against Jacksonville. Will Shipley is an interesting streamer so far this week, guys. One last, one last stat for you here. In Week 4, Carnell Tate saw a season-high 43% target share. It's his 3rd straight game with at least a 25% target share. And for the last week, Tate accounted for almost 74% of the Titans' air yards. This is the highest single-game mark of any wide receiver in In the NFL this season, Houston has already allowed 7 different wide receivers to score double-digit fantasy points.

Matthew, I don't know if you saw this the other day. Uh, we were having a conversation about the best running back in the game. Greg Cody announced with great bravado that it's Bijan Robinson without a doubt. Uh, and a lot of guys here pushed back and said, whoa, Derrick Henry still exists. But miraculously, we have a video of Derrick Henry talking about Bijan Robinson. Take it away, video guys.

He's the best in the game right now. He's doing it all. Yeah, I ain't gonna shy away from it. He's doing a great job.

I love the back.

Does a great job in their system. So Matthew Berry, what say you?

Yeah, I agree with Derrick Henry. I mean, look, Derrick Henry's a legend. He's a Hall of Famer. I think you could argue Christian McCaffrey and Jonathan Taylor in there. Jahmyr Gibbs is no slouch. But I think if you asked any running back, who their favorite running back in the NFL is, I think they'd all say to a person, Bijan Robinson. I think he's the most complete running back in terms of power and speed and pass-catching ability and ability to go through the middle. I mean, I think that— I think had Bijan Robinson gone to Detroit and Jahmyr Gibbs gone to Atlanta, Bijan Robinson is still Bijan Robinson. I'm not sure Jahmyr Gibbs is Jahmyr Gibbs in that— like, they're both super talented, but I just— I mean, Bijan Robinson is unbelievable. Yeah, he was a— I mean, and this was— I mean, he was the same way at Texas. And I don't know if Dave or if— I don't know. Not that this should matter because we're just talking about sort of on-field performance. But for whatever it's worth, I've interviewed Bijan a handful of times. I don't know if any of you guys have.

I see Dave nodding his head. Like, he's awesome. Like, he's just an awesome human being. And everyone I've ever talked to is like, Isn't Bijan great? Like, he's just like, he's an easy guy to root for.

Agree with that. And I think the distinction is Greg Cody said it earlier in the week when he floated it, best running back since Barry Sanders. And I think what he's getting at is Derrick Henry, much like Shaquille O'Neal admits himself, is I scored a lot of points, but I'm not a great scorer. That distinction is that Derrick Henry does it via blunt force. Bijan Robinson, is an artiste. He is a stylistic pleasure to look at before you talk to the guy, just as a football— you know, in a way, I know O.J. Simpson puts a stink on that, but, you know, Barry Sanders, there's something to the style that really breaks out in it. What—

what—

it's what makes the iconic running backs really stand out from the pack, I think.

Yeah, no, I, I completely agree with that. I mean, like, and I think right to your point about like Shaquille, like, you know, Shaq calls himself the most dominant ever. doesn't call himself the best ever. And I think that's right. I mean, Shaq was, in his prime, Shaq was the most dominant ever because he's just like— he's a genetic freak of nature, just like Derrick Henry is a genetic freak of nature. They're just bigger and badder than everyone else out there on the field. But yes, I mean, I think there's kind of a magic to the way that Bijan runs that— I mean, listen, and I guess Since Barry Sanders. Well, that's, that's interesting, right? Because then you— now you're starting to get into like, you know, you think about Marshall Faulk or LaDainian Tomlinson or like some of those guys, um, uh, that, that popped to mind. I mean, McCaffrey's in that list, right? I mean, so, but at the moment I would say Bijan Robinson is the best running back in the NFL. I don't know if I have to think about that, if he's the best one since Barry Sanders.

Uh, we've never been able to fantasy draft Lane Johnson, but everyone's benefited from his impact on the game and it It's quantifiable, his impact for that Eagles offense. Now he is retired. How do we project an Eagles offense that has been tough to kind of pin down?

Yeah, it's a tough one, right? I mean, because listen, you look at the numbers throughout, uh, throughout Jalen Hurts' career and you just look at the numbers of the Eagles offense and Jalen Hurts with Lane Johnson on the field and without. It's a significant loss. There's no question about it. You know, Cam Juergens, obviously their center, traded away. Juergens was having an up-and-down year, but still there's The point is there's a lot of turnover. The line's banged up beyond that. Like there's a lot of turnover on this line now. They also, they don't have DeVonta Smith. They might get Dallas Goedert back this week, but Saquon's banged up. We don't know if Saquon's gonna play. I mean, you heard me say in the, in the facts, uh, portion of this that I think Will Shipley's a nice fantasy start as a flex play in a PPR league. But yeah, I think, I think the most interesting thing about this game and I think as it relates to fantasy, I think you're probably still starting Jalen Hurts, although I'll tell you, I mean, I am as a high-end QB2 this week, like I'm a QB14. So I don't think he's a must-start, but you're depending on who else you have, you're probably still hoping that Hurts falls in the end zone and, and gets you there.

And I, I think you're starting the running back, whether it's Barkley or Shipley. But other than that, you don't feel great about this. The Jaguars have a real defense, like they're, they're really good. I don't love the fact that the Eagles aren't leaving till today to go to London. It's the, it's the London game. Like, there's just bad vibes all around. I will say this though, just to bring it more to a general sports topic. I don't know if you guys have gone there yet, but like, I think this is an awesome opportunity for Jalen Hurts because the, the anti-Jalen Hurts argument for so long is, well, he's a product of the system. He's a product of the fact that he's had this incredible offensive line and he's had AJ Brown and DeVonta Smith and Saquon Barkley around him. And well, that's the narrative around Jalen Hurts for the people that are not fans. And so now, like, this is going to be all on him. This is going to be one of those— this is an opportunity to be a, you know, a Josh Allen, Patrick Mahomes type game where he puts on the Superman cape and just says, you know, follow me to victory.

Screw it. I'm just going to— I'm just going to bring everyone along with me. Like, this is an opportunity for him against a very good Jaguars defense in an important game for the Eagles with basically, you know, a lot of people around him not available on Sunday.

Pretty wild. If the Eagles lose that game and the Giants win, which there's a great chance they will, the Giants will not just be in first place, they'll have a 2-game lead on both the Cowboys and Eagles. It's wild. Love the Will Shipley call if Saquon is down. Do this, assess this one, expert. Who wins this fantasy trade? DK Metcalf and, um, Sam LaPorta on one side for George Pickens and Colston Loveland.

Give me the Pickens-Loveland side. Uh, not close to me.

Not close, you say?

Not close.

'Cause I'm pleased to say that, uh, Dave Damashek is on the winning side then, and Jon Hamm and Trevor Duvall are on the losing side of that fantasy trade that went down just before Thursday Night Football.

Fantastic. Good job. So by the way, uh, guys, I just wanna, I wanna just throw this out to, uh, to, to everyone there in the studio. I like the fact that Damashek managed to A, get a Steeler in there and also drop that he's in a fantasy league with Jon Hamm. I think those, that's a, that's a pretty good—

He does it every Friday morning. Good morning, Matthew.

Yeah, I feel like, right, that feels like that's a look at me. I mean, I, you know, I don't, uh, but, uh, anyway, um, I brag to Jon Hammond I talk to Matt Sherry every Friday. I'm sure you do. I'm sure you do. No, listen, I know Jon's a, uh, a crazy fantasy football player. Um, uh, but no, I like that trade because I think that— listen, I've been dead wrong on Colston Loveland so far. He's somebody that I loved in the preseason. I thought he was going to have a monster year. It's obviously been very tough for anyone that drafted him high the way I did. I have a lot of Loveland this year. But if you look at the route participation, if you look at the route, you know, in terms of, you know, targets for route, like every underlying metric is Loveland, it's out there and they just haven't found a way to get him the ball. He should have 2 touchdowns on the season. So I just, I believe in the talent of Loveland. I believe in the play calling of Ben Johnson. I believe ultimately the ball is going to find him.

So I think the difference between Colston Loveland and Sam LaPorta isn't that great moving forward. Right. And so I know it's been rough for Loveland, but I do think better days are ahead. Meanwhile, DK Metcalf definitely gets a bump with the Michael Pittman injury. And you heard me talk earlier that the Steelers are throwing a lot more than expected. But still, I mean, I think that's Roman Wilson. I think it's the running backs. I think it's Pat Freiermuth. I just— DK Metcalf has never even in even in the elite years that DK Metcalf, him in the Russell Wilson years, he's never been a massive target earner. He's been a guy that lives on deep balls and touchdowns. And so can he get there? Meanwhile, I mean, George Pickens, again, like it's a, you know, you bought low at the exact right time. We know about the talent and, you know, obviously you benefited from a monster game last night from him. George Pickens, if we were redrafting today, is still going to be one of the first 15 wide receivers drafted. And I don't, I don't think Metcalfe would come anywhere close to that.

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Dan Le Batard.

I like options. I don't like Cheeto trying to corner the market by saying we're everything.

Dave Demachek.

Whoa, whoa, we're the puffy ones, we're the—

I believe you're picking up what I'm laying down.

This is the Dan Le Batard Show.

Matthew, I want to send you off with this hypothetical question. Presented by the one and only Dave Damashek. Would you rather see Syracuse win a national championship or have a one-time-use time machine that can take you to any musical performance or concert in the past?

Oh, I want— give me Syracuse. Give me, give me, give me Syracuse, uh, Syracuse to win. I mean, like, we're so spoiled with video and everything like that, and I get it's not like the same as being at that, at that whatever, you know, that live event, but like You know, I feel like, yeah, gimme Syracuse. Gimme Syracuse.

Matthew, you answered—

I'm not even sure what I would pick.

You answered correctly. Well, no, first, it's 100% the answer that everyone takes because Dave Damashek's time machine sucks and he doesn't want to admit it. You have a faulty time machine, Mr. Damashek. It is not practical in any way.

No, Matthew Barry got it wrong because what you didn't say, you didn't specify it's a Syracuse lacrosse title. So congratulations. I hope that was worth it.

I'd say it just like— listen, I love me some Gate Brothers. Yeah, I mean, I'm just trying to— I'm not even sure what I would pick to go back in time to watch. Is it like Woodstock, which happened before I was born? Is it something like— I'm trying to think like that. Or is— I don't know. I remember one time I was invited to a party when the NBA All-Star Game was in New York City. There was like a Friday night Nike party, a Jordan party that I got invited to. And I live in Connecticut, so it's like about 2, 2 and a half hours away. And I had something early Sunday— Saturday morning with my kids, like I was coaching one of their teams. It's just like, I don't know, like it sounds like a cool party, but I don't wanna drive all the way there. And, you know, I have to get up early for my— you know, so I passed on it. And what ended up happening is, is at midnight, apparently Prince came out and played like a private show, an unannounced private show. for this Nike party of like, whatever, 150, 200, I don't know how many people were at this party, this Jordan party, but like, you know, played like an hour and a half, like, you know, and I'm just like, ah, ah, and I had friends that were at the party and they were like, dude, it was Prince.

I mean, you know, and I've seen Prince before. He's like incredible. He was incredible as a live performance. So like, I think about that one. That one's like my biggest personal regret is that I missed that show. So I'd have to think about that one. But yeah, gimme Syracuse.

Matt.

Gimme a Syracuse.

Matthew, that All-Star Weekend was the All-Star Weekend where I was working SportsCenter in Bristol. I drove down, picked up my credential, and if you remember, that was like the coldest weekend ever.

Yes!

It was freezing. It was so cold that I remember holding my credential, looking around, and saying, F this, pulled out my phone, changed my flight to leave that day. I went home. I flew home. I was like, I'm not doing it. It's the only All-Star Weekend I've ever tapped out of. Like actively was on site and said, no más.

That was, by the way, that was part of the calculation and saying like, do I want to drive or, you know, get an Uber or whatever to go to New York? Because it's like it was icy roads. It was like insane. Like some just like, it's like it's freezing. It's like bad conditions. It's like just another party, you know? And they're always fun. But like, it's, you know what I mean? Like just to, to basically drive 5 hours when I had to be up at like 8 a.m., I had to be coaching at like 8 a.m. the next morning. I was just like, Eh, but you know what I mean? Like, if they told me Prince was playing, I'd have made it, you know? I'd have figured out a way. I'd have gotten my butt up. But you know, yeah, what are you gonna do?

Check out Matthew's new show, Pregame with Matthew Berry. It's on Roku. You don't need to have a Roku to have it. You can download the Roku app. Streaming weekdays from noon until 2 PM Eastern. And listen to full episodes of Fantasy Football Happy Hour with Matthew Berry. Matthew, thank you very much.

Appreciate you guys. See you next week.

See you next week.

Matthew Berry.

Matthew Berry.

Matthew Berry.

Matthew Barry! Dave Damashek, your time machine stinks. It doesn't work.

I don't understand these senseless attacks on my time machine.

But like, let me ask you this. Let's flip the mirror on you. You, sir, would you rather see the Pitt Panthers win, or the Pittsburgh Steelers win a championship, or go to some concert?

Well, I would— I'll take the title, but I— it also— Matthew Barry brings up an interesting question. What is the right answer? Obviously, it's gonna vary from person to person and what music you're interested in, but what is the sort of quintessential show? What are the legendary shows available? Like Coltrane and Miles Davis played in what, the Blue Note? Or is that even a bar, or is that a—

A club in New York? Yeah, the jazz club. Yeah, the Blue Note, right across from the Comedy Cellar.

I mean, maybe, maybe that would be one to see. I mean, Woodstock doesn't sound terribly appealing, or if you watch the documentary, it didn't seem like it was fun to be there, so I wouldn't choose that one. The Beatles showing up somewhere, their rooftop show or something like that?

See, the one I— someone said, I can't remember who said in the other room, I'm just gonna credit Mike, um, Beethoven. I want to see, like, was he really like that? Everyone's like, oh, this dude was doing all this. Was he really like that? Or Mozart? Maybe I was— is Amadeus— how faithful is Amadeus as a story to what actually happened?

That's a great one, Mike. What about the Ramones at, uh, what's it called?

CBGB?

Uh, you know, they're— yeah, CBGB.

Yeah. Or Studio— I see, here's the thing.

I mean, give me a Micron PC Bowl win.

How about—

what about the Hee Haw 3 in Vegas?

Absolutely not.

It was electric.

Studio 54.

Bad Boy Mowers.

Does that count? Does that count as a concert or musical performance if I go to Studio 54 on like New Year's Eve in like '74 or whatever?

Okay, now you're on to something. I mean, the greatest— the greatest parties in movie history, which party do you wish you would attend? I fancy, 'cause it was just on the other night, from Eyes Wide Shut, the Christmas party.

I don't wanna do that. That's what you go for?

You fiend.

You sick dog.

I'd go to the weirdo party.

I would go to the imaginary food fight in Hook.

Hell no.

No, no, no. I want some of that pink and blue stuff.

Not the mask party. I'm talking about the Christmas party that the rich doctor—

And I'm talking about Bangerang.

Oh, Rufio.

They— he just straight up killed him.

Yeah.

He killed the kid.

Yep.

That son of a bitch.

Cinephobe episode, uh, what was—

what was Hook?

That's how you want to go out, right? If you're gonna get stabbed, just like talking like, hey.

Uh-oh.

We doing Dracula?

Yeah, doing my getting stabbed and getting killed.

I mean, Dave still has a script.

Cinephile, episode 79. Get it wherever you get podcasts.

That documentary is coming out about that movie.

It's gonna be awesome.

About Hook?

Yeah.

There's a documentary?

I saw a documentary of like behind the scenes Robin Williams stuff.

That's gonna be awesome.

Hey, uh, what's her name? Erin Brockovich?

Julia Roberts? Did you just call it— what's her name?

Erin Brockovich?

Not even Pretty Woman.

She was something else. That Tinkerbell.

Oh yeah.

Wood.

Absolutely.

Yeah, just guys. We're just guys on a sports show.

Talking about Julia Roberts.

Erin Brockovich. Yeah, obviously.

As Tinkerbell.

Yeah, as Tinkerbell, for sure, in that little dress.

Glad it was— glad we got there.

Yes.

All right, all right, cool. Everybody would bang Tinkerbell from Hook.

Cool.

Glad we got that out, sports show. We're just guys.

Really good day.

I'm a red-blooded American male. I'm not afraid to say it.

What's the party?

I wanna bang Tinkerbell.

What's the party you'd go to? You said the, the food fight from Hook. That's a terrible party. That's a terrible pick.

Awful.

I'm gonna regret giving you that clip.

Enchantment Under the Sea dance?

The house party from House Party.

The house party from House Party. Too much dancing. Too much dancing? Too much dancing.

Just stand on the wall.

No, but then now you're lame. Oh, for crying out loud. Look, Roy, you picked the party. I didn't pick it. I don't want a party where it's like the only way I can stand out here is if I have to be drenched in sweat and doing synchronized dancing with someone else. That's how— that's house party. That's the only thing about house party. Kid Play and then Gina from Martin and, uh—

AJ Johnson.

Yeah, like, it's just too much, man. Too much dancing.

There's slow dancing there. Need to clarify. Fully grown Tinkerbell.

Yes! Oh, what are you gonna do, shove it up your—

Well, 'cause like, no, there's a— you remember she makes a wish?

Yes. And then, and then Peter Pan is like, let me go to my boring old wife and family. Are you out of your mind, Peter Pan? You see this fully grown Erin Brockovich in front of you and you're gonna say I'm gonna go back to that?

I don't need fully grown.

Pretty Woman, man.

All right.

She's, she's a lady.

She's of age.

Oh my God, don't do this.

Jeremy, move on. Jeremy, what's the party you'd go to?

Uh, I was trying to think. Do I want to be at the Superbad party where Michael Cera's singing in the, the, with the guys who are all coked out? Or do I want to be—

these eyes, these eyes crying.

Or do I, do I want to be, do I want to be at the Gatsby party and just kind of observing?

Now you're getting there, Tashay. Now you're starting to get somewhere with the— with that brain of yours.

Gatsby would be fun.

What about the Corleone wedding at the— at the store? You know, that's a nice party.

Do you get to ask a question or a favor of Don Corleone?

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. You get a meeting.

What would you ask?

Right behind— I'm moving on. I'm doing other parties here already. The Gatsby party is great. Um, I'd like to attend the party for the meal, uh, at, uh, in Big Night.

The party— what, which party is this?

Big Night.

What's Big Night? I don't know Big Night. I know not a Big Night.

The, the movie with the meal with the brothers, they cook the, the, the early '60s. Big Night, right? Isn't that the name of the movie? Am I not getting the name of the picture right?

I've never heard of it, so that's why I'm confused. Yeah, big night.

Stanley Tucci.

I'm already out. Stanley Tucci and Tony Shalhoub? I don't want to go to that party.

You, you don't know this movie and you do Cinephobe?

It doesn't qualify. It's 96% on Rotten Tomatoes. Why would I know this movie? I only know movies that are poorly rated. Poorly rated, Dave Damashek, like your time machine.

What about, uh, in that— on Would You Like to Be with the Ewoks after the evil Empire?

No.

Vanquished once and for all.

I don't want to.

And Anakin's corpse is there and they burn it.

Hey.

On a, uh, on a bonfire. Hey, stand around and sing.

I mean, I mean, we have to break in. The chat is going off on Chris.

They don't get it.

What? This chat just doesn't get it.

Uh, but I do see one in the pink, 2 in the tink.

Oh wow.

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Dan Le Batard!

If Daniel Day-Lewis did it, you'd be jerking off all over yourself.

Oh, come on.

Yeah, I would be.

Aggressive description.

I mean, what is it? What is that? I'm just saying. No, you're just saying what?

That's me. Daniel Day-Lewis does something. I see that photo of Daniel Day-Lewis looking like Lincoln before he's about to start filming Lincoln, and you know what I do, Amin?

Mike Ryan!

I jerk off all over myself. That's what I do.

Lincoln, who you outed the other day?

Don't make this a rejoin.

This is the Dan Le Batard Show!

I don't want to go to that Ewok party, Dave Damashek, because they're eating Stormtroopers. I don't want to eat Stormtrooper.

Yeah, yeah, she's an adult.

Yeah, yeah, I want to bang Tinkerbell. I knew it. I knew I would regret that. Actually, Tinkerbell might be a predator. Oh no, if you want to have that—

she was grooming—

you want to have that She was grooming.

Oh boy.

This is what happens on Fridays when Dan's out, guys. Buckle up. This is gonna be our highest-rated show ever. I— here's a Star Wars party I would go to. I would go to Princess Amidala's funeral.

Funeral?

Yeah. Dude, it's on Naboo. Have you seen the Nabooan—

Which movie is this?

This is the end of Revenge of the Sith.

Okay.

She dies.

Kind of want to see her alive.

Nah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Tinkerbell's 73 years old.

Or—

I wanna bang Tinkerbell!

Or, or would I go to— Dave Damashek, would I rather go to the party at Jabba's Palace?

Oh, that's a fun— that, that's a fun gig, although you might get dropped through the floor and eaten by a giant beast. So that, that's the, uh, the downside.

I'll mind my P's and Q's.

I'll be well-behaved.

What about the old school party that sort of starts the whole fraternity?

Yeah.

Snoop show.

But then he also—

We're going streaking!

Snoop-a-loop! But he also, he also ended up sleeping with, uh, Mitch slept with an underage Eliza Dushku. Was it Eliza Dushku?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, Back to School, the party that Rodney Dangerfield throws at the, uh, at the made-over dorm room. They connect the 3 or 4 dorm rooms, you know, and they put the hot tub and all of that in there. And Oingo Boingo plays. Not a big Oingo Boingo fan, but still would be a neat thing if they were playing your college gig.

What about Kajagoogoo?

Kajagoogoo is there?

Yeah, in a pinch. In a pinch. Kajagoogoo in a pinch.

Kajagoogoo, Lamal, I'm going too shy. Hush hush, eye to eye, you're too shy shy, hush hush. I'll tell you who was the big loser there, was the bully from the diving team. And you have to really be a bully if your diving team— if you're the bully of your diving team, that's what he is. He also is, of course, the bad guy in Karate Kid.

What about Bananarama?

Passing on Bananarama.

You're passing on Bananarama. So, all right, I'm writing these down.

In a pinch, I'm going Lamont.

In a pinch? Oingo Boingo, Kajagoogoo, Bananarama.

What about the wedding?

Next to Midnight Runner.

The wedding in Wedding Crashers where they have to go away to go on the island and they get the change of clothes and everything. So the wedding where— what's, uh, Christopher Walken, his daughter's getting married.

I shouldn't have danced.

Why'd I have to show off like that? If you see the crab cakes, give me the crab cakes.

Yeah.

That one—

Ooh, you know what? I mentioned it earlier in the show. Bilbo Baggins' birthday party.

No way. No way.

Why not?

They smell awful.

I wanna see girls at this party.

Well, Jessica Smethana's gonna be there.

They're gonna be hobbit girls.

He did Wrigley Field to scale.

He has nowhere to put it.

What about Bow Wow Wow in a pinch?

Mm-mm-mm.

Okay.

Okay.

Jeremy, you had an interesting observation against my better judgment.

Wang Chung in a pinch?

I did. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Not even in a pinch, headliner.

You asked the question, what's a team that I have no rooting interest for other than I want to see their uniforms on a bigger stage? Yeah.

When you guys were talking about UCLA and Oregon earlier, and ironically, like, most people think about Oregon's uniforms, but UCLA has one of my favorite uniform sets, just the color scheme that they have, and I found myself thinking like, ooh, man, I'm rooting for UCLA to go to the college football playoff because if I'm gonna have to watch every random college football playoff game, I would at least like one that is aesthetically pleasing. So why not root for certain teams due to their uniform set so that I get a chance to see them? I'll root for Texas over Oklahoma because I'm more interested in seeing Texas's uniforms at some point. I like that burnt orange color. So for me, I'm gonna find myself rooting for certain teams throughout the course of this college football season, maybe even throughout the NFL season, where I have no rooting interest in the game outside of the fact that, mm, I like the aesthetic matchup that might come later on.

I'll tell you, before I worked at ESPN—

That doesn't happen to you?

Before I worked at ESPN, Syracuse. Syracuse basketball. I always liked Syracuse basketball.

Yeah, like Carolina basketball uniforms. Don't you love those?

And then I worked at ESPN and I discovered that like, oh—

Everyone there is Syracuse.

Yeah, everyone went to Syracuse and it's like this whole thing. And ever since then, I can't stand Syracuse. I can't stand that color.

Toga party, toga party in Animal House.

Thompson Twins in a pinch. 3 band members, none of them Thompson, none of them twins.

Amen.

Or yeah, they had some winners, a couple winners.

Georgetown. Georgetown is another uniform that I've always liked from afar. Miami, Miami Hurricanes. Yeah, basketball and, and football, like from when they were Nike.

Yeah, won't be Nike next year. Nelson in a pinch.

Like Texas Rangers baseball jerseys. Oh, that's some good ones.

That one with the A-Rod Texas Rangers jersey.

Oh, the red one.

Everyone had that.

That's a good shout.

Mr. Mister.

Oh no, you guys are tearing— yeah, I'm gonna allow Mr. Mister, but I, but I am not going to allow this, these awful uniform takes. Please step in, Drip Driller Mike Ryan. These are cachet. And especially Amin. Amin and I park our cars in the same garage on so many subjects, but we could not be further apart on uniform-related— I mean, there's nothing we agree on in uniforms.

You have terrible taste.

Or time machines. You have terrible taste in time machines.

Well, listen, I'm sorry mine isn't fancy enough to accommodate all your desires, but what we're talking about right now is your terrible taste in uniforms. The Texas Rangers is a great uniform. The Miami Hurricanes is a great uniform.

The Miami Hurricanes is You got a great color scheme. The uniform, we addressed the issue with the piping. Last night was an incredible color clash on Thursday Night Football. That, that Bucs-Dallas Cowboys game really pops. And even though the Cowboys uniform makes absolutely no sense, it provides incredible color clashes. And I don't know about you, but I am breathless waiting for next Thursday night when we have a color versus color matchup. Dave, you know what's happening, right?

We have Seahawks. I'm very excited about it.

Seahawks, Broncos, both in home throwbacks.

Ah, how far back are we throwing?

'90s, early, early '90s.

So we're getting that really royal blue for the Seattle Seahawks.

And I'd say '85 about, right? Is Mike— isn't that more accurate?

Like Broncos, we're going Super Bowl era Broncos, not like Elway in the '80s.

No, no, no, we're going with the Orange Crush.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, with the light blue helmet.

That is Elway era.

I know, but he was like talking Elway Super Bowl wins.

Yeah, Super Bowl wins is what I meant. Like, you know, that, that the tarot deck with the big horse.

Yeah, one of the great redesigns because of the Nike thing.

Yeah, well, let me tell you something, that was an upgrade. Hey, Dave Damashek, this is one something to ponder. Best uniform upgrades in history.

Well, you just named one that is not.

What?

The Toronto Navy Blue is an upgrade from the orange grunge getup?

So much better.

So much better. It was so cool looking. It was so cool. It looked like they came into the future. I'll tell you another one. Phoenix Suns, from what they were in the '80s to when Charles Barkley got there, best upgrade ever. That sunburst. Oh, here's another upgrade.

Toronto Raptors.

Get rid of the dinosaur and just go sleek and modern with the basketball with the claw marks on it.

Woo-wee!

Don't talk to me about upgrades. Upgrades! Miami Heat, get rid of that old bimbo Kohl's looking ass jersey and get the clean look that remains to this day. Upgrades! Searle, you got some upgrades?

It's interesting that, well, the ones that are sort of on the table that we love, the ones we genuflect to, the uniforms that I think we collectively kind of get get tired of. People swoon now over the, the creamsicles of the, of the Buccaneers, but I remember when they changed the uniforms to the pewter, people thought that was a great— people thought that was a great change.

It was.

Similarly, I think it was 1980-ish that the Jets swapped out their white helmets, Joe Namath, for the green that I think people now like, but I feel like people are starting to pine for the white helmets now because we've had a couple of years with the green, and that's how it goes.

You know what I pine for? I pine for the Giants helmets that say Giants on it, not New York.

No, that, that you're wrong about. See, that's, that's a classic example of how people are wrong about things, and a great upgrade was throwing it back, I guess, to when Eli was winning those Super Bowls. The NY lowercase is cooler than the Giants. You love that Giants one because you associate it with LT.

Absolutely.

I love seeing the throwback look occasionally. I think their main look is better. The nameplates on the back really pop, but they have the same thing that Dallas Cowboys home set has, which is— it bothers me. The helmet is not the same color blue as the jersey.

Hmm.

Right.

Yeah.

I like the Padres. Padres did a really good job because what the Padres did is they had in like the '70s and '80s, they had like what they have now, which is the brown and the orange, the yellow, and like all of those colors going on. They eventually changed that. to where they changed their uniform set, added navy to it.

Navy blue, yeah.

To where it was sort of navy and orange. Then they got rid of the orange and they basically made it just navy in the early 2000s with sort of like a beige around it. It was horrible. And then they finally added as an alternate jersey, they brought back, oh, here's a little bit of brown. And then finally in 2020, they were like, you know what, we're going all the way back. We're getting pinstripes on Padres at home with the brown and the yellow. We're getting pinstripes on the road. I love what the Padres uniforms look like now, and that was a huge upgrade by taking a piece of the past and bringing it to the present.

Team Canada hockey.

Here's the best one. I mean, the best one is— I'd be remiss if I didn't throw this one in there— the coolest one ever. And I love the two-tone blue of the old Pittsburgh Penguins, but when they upgraded to black and gold so that all 3 of the local teams wear black and gold, that is the coolest uniform-related thing for any sports town there is.

I mean, it's a sensible upgrade for sure, Is that the coolest? I think— me thinks—

Yes. I just told you.

Well, I don't believe you. I don't believe you, Dave Damashek.

What's cooler than that, that all the teams wear black and gold? The entire city has a color scheme.

What's cooler is every franchise having its own identity. And I'd say, oh, what are you guys doing? I'd like to do that too.

Mike Ryan, your thoughts?

I do think the Tampa Bay Bucs are probably the greatest rebrand ever because it totally turned their fortunes because They were like, they were a loser franchise when they were wearing the creamsicle orange. And now it's fun to do like the throwback in doses, but it had been time. Like everyone was frustrated. They weren't very good.

The logo was terrible. It was like this weirdo with a mustache and a hat.

Yeah, they, they immediately rebranded and began playing well.

Buccaneer Bruce, that chapeau tilted askew. Oh yeah, he's like, uh, like Chris Odi in Dracula or whatever the hell he was doing 5 minutes ago there. Um, The worst one, the danger of doing that, Mike Ryan, of changing your uniforms, is now the Patriots are jammed up with their greatest memories ever, and they're in a tough spot now. I advocated when Tom Brady left.

They got 3 more throws.

That's when you put— that's when you dump out on the Flying Elvis uniforms so that that era stands alone. And otherwise you just go back to Pat Patriot and you just leave those highlights to— that was that era of time, and now we're back to our better getups. Don't change your uniforms mid-dynasty. That's the real— Houston Rockets, 2 titles in a row, they change uniforms. Never again! The Pittsburgh Penguins, 2 straight Stanley Cups, change their uniforms. They don't win in '93 even though they were the best team in the league. The, the St. Louis Rams in the nice gold and blue, they win the Super Bowl. They go to the Super Bowl in the metallics, in the metallic gold, they lose to the aforementioned Patriots.

I do want to make an NFL note here. Just passed along the wire, Mike Ditka has passed away.

Oh.

Oh, nah.

That's a shame.

Ditka, my mother grew up in his neighborhood, literally on his block. And it's a little off-color, but he was amused by this story, so I will tell it to you quickly now. Aliquippa, Hopewell, PA, steel town and all of that. He was a guest in the early days of the Jimmy Kimmel Live!

At 3 minutes left, when we played the 3-minute mark, you know what that meant? That meant it was my time to get to talk baseball, okay? We get 3 minutes of baseball on this show, okay? We get 3 minutes of baseball in this show.

Wow, you—

I did not expect that.

Yeah, I hate Mike Ditka.

You hate Mike Ditka. Yeah, yeah.

Great, thanks for making me say that. I, yep, I care more about baseball. We had the Guardians, we had the White Sox. It was both teams winning on the road. This is an incredible time in baseball where you've still got one series remaining in the division series, and it's An actual in-division series between these teams from the AL Central. The Guardians losing both games at home. Oh my God, the power of the Pope. The White Sox, they're gonna do everything. Look at the blackout in Chicago. It's gonna be unbelievable. But then you had a back-and-forth game last night. In the 3rd inning, the White Sox take a 2-0 lead. Then 3 runs in the 5th by the Guardians. Then a couple more in the bottom of the 5th by the White Sox. Then how about this? Double, single, single, single, Single. Oh my God, the Guardians win 9-5. It's been an unbelievable series between these 2 things. And hey, guess what?

What?

We got the best 2 words in sports coming up tomorrow.

Game 7?

Game 5.

Okay.

The deciding Game 5 between the Guardians and the White Sox. Baseball is in an unbelievable place.

Hear, hear.

That deserves a toast. Worth a Toast is presented by Cuervo. Keep it fun, keep it Cuervo, keep it Major League Baseball.

We got like 10 seconds left in this show. We didn't get to play the Dak Prescott video of some dude calling him— was it awful? What'd they call him?

Embarrassing.

Embarrassing. And then him turning around, and then the guy apparently didn't say shit.

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