Transcript of Jason Benetti And The Dap Heard Around The World | Hour 1

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You are listening to the Dan Levitan Show in partnership with the DraftKings Sports App. Now live in all 50 states.

This episode of the Dan Le Batard Show is presented by DraftKings Sports. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

Star of the day, star of the day. It is your star of the day. Star of the day, star of the day. It is your star of the day. Star of the day, star of the day. It is your star of the day. Star of the day. Star of the day. It is the star of the day.

This is in honor of what just happened in the last segment where Zaz, who's been following all the soccer, was taken aback by the fact that Spain has allowed a goal because we're so obsessed with stars and offense that we did not know that dating back to the 2022 World Cup, Spain is now the first team in World Cup history 6 consecutive, we don't allow goals.

We don't—

you, you're not going to beat us because no one is going to score on us.

That's so good.

It's pretty good. Yeah, it's never been done before. They've been playing soccer a long time, been doing the World Cup a long time.

A lot of goals have been scored, not as many as Americans would like, but yeah, Spain's pretty good at not allowing you to score goals. Thank you, Poppy. I appreciate all the support there. Let's go back to David Lee Roth and the secondhand cringe that Zaslow hates. Now, Zaz, I'm warning you, let's keep a Zaz cam here because Zazz says he feels terrible shame and embarrassment on behalf of others, and I believe this video is going to make him feel shame and embarrassment for David Lee Roth.

I get bad secondhand.

Give me, give me a Zazz, give me a close-up, give me a Zazz cam, give me something that really digs in on Zazz here because I'm wincing just as I see this up. So this is the context: it's a Las Vegas hotel and, uh, David, video of this. Listen to me.

We pick up right before the door opens.

Sazh, what did you say? You said that on a flight somewhere you were trying to hide because of Tim Robinson's comedy?

Oh my God, I watched on a flight to London, I watched the movie Friendship with Tim Robin— what's his name again?

Tim Robinson.

Tim Robinson and Paul Rudd, and I was so uncomfortable watching the movie, I had to press pause for a moment and just walk up and down the aisle a couple times.

OK, so this is the context you need, Mike, help me. This is David Lee Roth in his 60s looking dapper, it's a Las Vegas hall hallway, and he is looking like you would dress in a 1920-era Depression saloon where you're a gangster. It's gray, it's a vest, he's feeling good about himself, he always does, he's a rock star, he's David Lee Roth. And he hears—

It is a Peaky Blinders type outfit.

Yeah, thank you. I could have said it in those words and it would have been much quicker.

I also had to Google Peaky Blinders. It's been a minute.

So the alleyway though here to this, the hallway, is a Las Vegas hallway with all of the sadness that connotes, okay? Just doors and doors, endless doors. There's no one on this hallway except the ghost of David Lee Roth, who hears Van Halen in one of the rooms. And there's some kids in there, and won't they be excited to meet the lead singer of Van Halen.

Here it is.

We heard some Van Halen here, and my name's David Lee Roth, and I'm right across the hallway. Wanna know, we're on our way to EDC, but the fellas here coming down the hallway and they said, shit, we heard some Van Halen. And I said, no shit. So we're your neighbors, guys. We're off to EDC.

We're doing shit.

And we heard one of the fellows said, I heard some Van Halen shit through the doorway. So I am Van Halen. Outstanding, fellas. My pleasure. Have a great night.

Enjoy the Vegas State.

Small, tiny world.

No, they don't know who he is.

They thought it was a noise complaint.

Yeah, they don't know who he is.

He is.

Why is the commissioner of the Monster Big 12 at our door?

It does look like a Jormag.

I mean, he has to introduce when he opens the door, I'm David Lee Roth.

Well, eventually just went to I'm Van Halen because they didn't know who David Lee Roth was.

That's my favorite part. No, I'm Van Halen.

They don't even remember Sammy Hagar. They don't remember what came after him. Those were young kids.

I got to be honest. And I know who Van Halen is, although I don't get Van Halen, but I know who Van Halen is. And obviously I know David Lee Roth. If that guy knocked on my door and he's, you know, all looking like, you know, Peaky Blinders, I don't think I would recognize that's David Lee Roth.

And he's aggressively charismatic in a way.

He really carried— it could have been—

we heard some music.

It could have been— that was Chris Farley more than—

we're headed to EDC.

And the guy who opens the door wearing an RIP Harambe shirt, just staring him in the face like, what is happening right now?

What a time capsule that video was. It's incredible.

Like, David Lee Roth, former lead singer of one of the biggest bands in the world at the time, biggest rock star in the world for a couple of years, he, he, he himself, he went out of his way to knock on their door.

They thought it was a noise complaint.

And I feel like during this conversation they're probably saying to themselves, I, I hope he goes away soon.

No one in that room, and there were about 5 dudes, No one knew who that was. They were all confused and they were being polite because the guy had a camera and a headset.

But they want him to go away.

I'm Van Halen. Alright, you guys going to EDC?

You guys going to what's it called today? He carried it with charisma, otherwise that could have been really, really uncomfortable because if he had not kept talking because he was on camera and he's forever David Lee Roth, it would have just been a whole bunch of dudes staring staring at a curiosity from across the hall. Who's this grandfather and why is he knocking on our door about the noise?

Like, the only reason that they're any kind of curious and even smiling is because there's a cam— there's very clearly a camera and there are lights.

Well, it's his headset too. He's wearing—

he's got a performer's headset.

He's got a microphone, as he always does, right in front of his mouth.

This has Kevin Rogers Radio Row vibes a little bit.

Lincoln Kennedy, what's up, man? Yeah, I'm working.

Where you going?

You want the FHM party tonight? You going to FHM tonight?

All right, I'll see you later.

Going to EDC tonight? All right, we'll catch you at EDC. I'm Van Halen.

I'm Van Halen. It's such a funny thing for him to say 30 years after he hasn't been Van Halen.

I'm Van Halen, and you were tremendous.

They've famously stayed Van Halen after he left, making him very much not Van Halen.

It'd be like if I said hello to people like that, they don't know who I am, and then I just said, I'm Dan Le Batard Show.

I'm Le Batard Show. Going to Flanagan's tonight? Catch you later.

Why would I say that?

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Who's the GOAT in soccer?

Who's the GOAT in hoops?

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Down, Levitar!

God, I would love to see that interaction. Lord, let there be a day.

Hey, Oprah!

Let there be a day. Oh, The Color Purple.

You like these glasses?

She would see these glasses, she'd be like, this is someone I'll take a picture with, he looks sophisticated.

I love big game, not a big game.

Jonathan Sasselow.

She would say that to me instead of me having to go up to her and say I'm a big fan. She's like, I love big deal, not a big deal.

Huge fan of your work.

You're a one-time or two-time championship broadcaster?

Two. Oprah, two.

You think Oprah would say like, "Hey, know about that book club?" Well, and I would say, "Yes, I do, Oprah.

Yes, I do." Have you seen Weapons?

But the kids!

This is the Dan Levatar Show.

Can I interest you guys in a list of the top 10 pass rushers ranked?

ESPN.com.

Yes, the World Cup's almost over.

Still no Marlins.

LeBron's got to pick a team.

You know what? I do want to talk about the Marlins for a second. I want to talk about them nationally because we might as well be first to the story. It is just baseball, but the lowest payroll in baseball has figured out some things about how to win cheaply. And while they don't have quite the top of the rotation the Phillies do, they'd have one of the best records in the American League right now.

They are a very good baseball baseball team.

They're third in their division, but they beat Seattle yesterday again. Uh, how many— what are they, 19-2 at home over the last 21? Something absurd like that.

Yeah, they've won 15 of their last 17 at home. They won 15 of their last 19 overall. They have the best record in baseball since June 1st. They have a better record than the Yankees. Like, most people think the Yankees won't go to the World Series. They've lost 10 of 13. They've been dreadful. But the Marlins, just a few games before the All-Star break have a better record than the New York Yankees.

This is funny to me, as always when it happens, because I hesitate to try and trust my front office to be smarter than everyone else's front office. Carolina just won the Cup, the Stanley Cup. They just won it. And their owner is notoriously cheap and he's put his family on the trophy. You have to— when, when you're building these things, and you're in charge of something that's a little bit precious, and rich people can lack a certain class. So I, I want to get to that Carolina story in a second with you, but the people who have run the Marlins here for a while have done it very poorly for a really long time. But the new people who borrowed all of those Tampa Bay principles and got cheap and efficient have the lowest payroll in baseball, and they're taking out Seattle here, who is beneath them record-wise and just, you know, played at the top of the sport for the World Series. Some of this stuff can be super random, like the Big Dumper's terrible now, he's batting .160 with 9 homers, and you can't recreate this from year to year. But in their division, where the Braves and the Phillies are ahead of them, the Mets spent all the money in the world and it's just a total clown show.

And with the lowest payroll in baseball, the Marlins are playing better than the Braves right now, who have been terrible, and playing with the Phillies. They're, they're better than the Phillies since the beginning of June, and they They're good enough to play for that division. Their run differential— the Phillies have a far worse run differential than the Marlins do.

They're negative.

The Marlins are a good baseball team, hard stop. Like, it's not— this is going to be something that needs to be reckoned with because when their young people go to Oakland to play their young people, they ravage them. Like, it's, uh, it's— they've got a talent disparity with young arms and young discounts and young people who are super, super hungry. Baseball's really random and weird, and this team is Good. Like, it's, it's healthy and it's good.

What's crazy is that, yes, it's healthy overall. Pitching-wise, they started this with essentially two starting pitchers. It was Max Meyer and it was Sandy Alcantara. Yuri Perez missed a month in the span of all of this, and that's part of why he was taken out during the perfect game. They have Tyler Phillips, who had been a reliever all of last year, shifted back into a starting role. He threw 5 shutout innings last night, and, and he was a guy they, they traded for, for cash considerations. The thing that Peter Bendix has done is it's finding the diamonds in the rough. Some of the bigger free agent signings where they've spent more money, ironically, have not always panned out. Pete Fairbanks is starting to pitch well. It feels like in the last week or so he's maybe turned a corner a bit. But Chris Paddock didn't work out. Christopher Morel didn't work out. But it's all these other guys. It's Otto Lopez, who was DFA'd by multiple teams, that's now going to be a shortstop in the All-Star Game. If he gets a hit in the next 4 games, he'll have the most hits by the All-Star break in Marlins history.

Like, he's having a tremendous year. Liam Hicks, Xavier Edwards being given second base, Kyle Stowers, who's starting to rip the ball again and looking like his All-Star self.

This team is good. Did he dap him up yesterday? Did he do that to Stowers?

Funny that you asked that, Dan. I specifically— I was on ESPN last night, but I was watching the Marlins on my iPad while I was working. And one of the main reasons that I did that— yes, the game was close, so I wanted to see how it ended, but I wanted to see if Jeremy Taché in his postgame interview, which he did on the field last night with Costowers, if he was going to dap him up. And I don't believe that he did.

I am told that we don't have video of that, that we only have a photo of that. We don't have video proof of anything dap-related.

You can't prove anything.

Okay, very interesting that you said that. And the reason that we don't have video is because you actually can't see on the video when Jeremy either shakes his hand like a normal professional broadcaster, or if he daps him up, which was very unprofessional and a little bit cringeworthy a couple nights ago, because the lower third on the video was covering it up. So, you know, we only have a still image, and—

Oh, so you didn't come this hard at Jeremy yesterday, though. You believe it to be unprofessional in the way that he shook hands.

Well, are they bros? Like, are you friends? I don't know. You tell me, Jeremy, is that your bro the other night? Who was it? Was it Marcy?

Yeah, both Marcy and Flowers are my guys.

Those are my guys.

Those are my guys.

What does that mean?

Not my bros, but they're my guys.

What does that mean? And what does turn a corner mean? I saw Chris got excited with a turned corner.

Fairbanks turned a corner.

He might have turned a corner.

Are you—

did he take a step or did he turn a corner?

Taking a step is, is, I think, too far. Turning a corner before you take a step.

He's already taken the steps in his career to be a good pitcher. So now it's just we're looking for corners.

You can't turn a corner without taking a step.

I feel like when you're young and you're not established, that's when you're taking steps. Once you establish yourself, there's really no more steps.

I view it as steps up the stairs.

Right?

Like, you turn a corner, you're still on flat ground. But I view taking a step as taking a step up.

So around the corner come the stairs.

That's right. That's right.

But look, you can still take a step on a flat surface, guys. What are we doing?

Speaking of flat surfaces and stairs, I was wondering the other day if it's better exercise to walk level or downstairs. Hmm, because it's definitely the most exercise to walk upstairs, right? We can all agree there.

Yeah, exercise to walk level. So how long are these stairs?

No, I'm just saying, because walking downstairs is a breeze. I was— I had this thought because when I was walking down like 4 stairs, 4 stories of stairs the other day, I'm just like, this is easy. I'm not tired at all. Whereas if I walked up those stairs, I would be like, my legs would be burning.

And I got to thinking, it's a real Bill Nye the Science Guy thing you got going.

Better exercise to walk level If I walk 100 stories downstairs, or if I walk a hun— like the equivalent distance, that many steps, what's better exercise?

It's what you're arguing here. There is a funny bit here.

Rest in peace, John Brinkus.

Bill Guy instead of Bill Nye. Here he is just trying to bring up scientific topics here and trying to examine the physics of does the momentum of going downstairs help you so much that it's actually less exercise?

Am I gaining weight when I walk downstairs? If I'm, if I'm losing weight walking upstairs.

Bill Guy Science Nigh is the segment and it's just Chris Cody doing science.

I'm convinced I'm gaining weight.

Yeah, put it on the poll. Are you gaining weight when you walk down the stairs?

So you're, you're asking the question. You're seriously asking the question right now.

How many— am I burning more calories walking level or downstairs?

Okay, so, so a couple of nights ago, Jeremy daps up. Jacob Marcy.

Smooth as hell.

And last night the screen cut it off in live view, but I'm fairly certain you did not dap up Kyle Stowers. That— I don't know for sure.

So what are you alleging, that he's extra chummy with, uh, when he daps he's being extra chummy?

He's not. When he says that's my guy, he's got a guy order on who his guy is, and if he daps him up, that's a higher guy than the other guy.

That's what it would appear to be.

Yeah, I want to establish some ground rules. What are your goals while you're walking? Are you trying to burn more calories, or are you trying to build up specific muscles? Because you can argue walking downstairs works some muscles that walking on a flat surface doesn't. And if that's your goal, to build up the quads, then walk downstairs. But if your goal is to burn calories—

calories—

flat surface.

I want to get skinnier.

Flat surface.

Heard.

Well, I think this is heart rate related though, because if you go— if you keep going downstairs, if you keep going down—

so it's the speed I'm going?

Yeah, well, it's not just the speed.

Same could be Except for a flat surface, guys.

You want to keep your heart rate in a certain area to fat burn. But if you're going downstairs and you start, uh, yeah, I believe that ends up being more exercise over time if it's going to be 100 stairs versus the same distance flat.

So for me, it depends on the result of the game. So for Marcy, that's a walk-off. That's a huge moment. He's been struggling. Kyle Stowers has been playing well over the last several games, so You know, he hits the home run in the second inning. They win 2-0. All right. But what about the pitching?

What if it's a guy who, you know, you don't even know that well on the team that does the walk-off?

I do my job well.

You're going to dap up anyone? Anyone who gets a walk-off is getting dapped up by Jeremy Taché. That's what you're saying?

More likely than not, they're coming to me. What you didn't see was the dap before the cameras started rolling.

With?

With Marci.

So you dapped him up twice, you're saying?

Well, this is— I'm hearing other sources say that they also saw what you saw last night, says no dap. You can— it's cut off on video, but he did not, he did not dap up Stowers.

Well, I think then there's something to be said about that. Clearly your relationship with Marcy's a little bit different.

But he's right when he says the game before it was more exciting.

They win the win.

No, but they were up 4-2 and then they were down 5-4 and they got a big home run and then they won in extra innings.

The game that—

the game the night before was more energetic. Last night was 2-nothing. It didn't have the same drama. That's what Jeremy's alleging. He's not He's not alleging bias, he's alleging the emotion of the moment.

The last thing that I am, guys, is performative, okay?

If I'm walking upstairs, my thighs start to burn. Which muscles will start to burn if I walk downstairs?

Quads.

Is it the same muscles?

Quads.

Okay.

Guys, I answered this question.

Calves too, your calves.

Yeah, look, also, if you're looking to work out those specific parts of your body, it doesn't come without a cost because it's tougher on your knees to walk downstairs than it is to walk a flat surface. But if your goal is burning calories, it is flat surface.

You don't think as you're walking away someone says, hmm, attaché kid, a little too comfortable around the guys, he's not on the team?

No, I think that's actually something that I've been complimented for by the people behind the scenes.

That you're on the team? Is that you're complimented that you're on the team?

Is the comfortable relationship that I'm able to establish with these players to get them to like me, for me to like them, to learn more about their story. There's a reason why Talking with Tashay is a thing that exists where I'll be interviewing Otto Lopez about his experience getting named an All-Star, and that'll be out on Marlins.tv, which you can purchase for less than $0.50 a game right now.

How does walking backwards play in here?

So out of all your hustles, the only one where you overstay your welcome is this one.

I was never welcomed.

That's a good point.

I mean, but you do much to endear yourself with. I do my job well, and there's a reason that Talking with Tashay exists. Yeah, that's right.

I do my job well. I don't believe I've ever heard anyone on this show say—

now, it's also true of the rest of us, but "I do my job well" is not something I've heard said out loud by anyone here about anything in 21 years.

No, I'm good at pretty much everything I do except for here. I am. I can't dance either.

He's Italian, Marcy, right? You should do a little like double peck.

I'll bring it up in the clubhouse. I'll bring it up in the clubhouse. I'll tell him, hey, next time you have a walk-off. Double, double baseball.

Hey, let's test some boundaries. Let's go. Let's use— after the depth, let's use the sideline. Let's make it a tapestry of, of politics.

History.

Yeah, of politics. Look, let's show the Giants something. The Giants stink. The Giants and their boy manager stink. They spend all sorts of money, they stink. The Marlins have something here.

I believe your logo is the dude from La Bamba.

I can't believe your logo is Mike Biamonte.

Talking with Tesche looks like—

featuring—

looks like Whittingham.

Tony, you know that moment at a party or a tailgate where everything just sort of clicks?

I know it well.

It's usually when I show up, everybody goes crazy.

Yeah, you usually take all the credit for it, but it's because Tony usually walks in with Cuervo. I walk in like this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cuervo is a thing that turns hanging out into this is the night.

It has that effect on people.

It does. You usually take the credit for it, but again, it's the Cuervo effect. It's like that moment in a big game where everyone in the crowd just start standing up, hooting and hollering. Keep it Cuervo, baby!

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Down, Levitar!

Jessica thinks you're pathetic. I saw the look on her face. It can never be the lane to victory. No, I think Jeremy's pathetic.

Jeremy, you should hear him back here.

So sad.

Most absurd theater kid basketball analysis line that I've ever heard from him.

Jeremy, touché.

My dad was talking about the adjustments that Spo made and criticizing him last night, and Jeremy just back here His adjustments were spectacular.

It's just like they lost.

They're down 0-2.

This is the Dan Levitan Show.

Jason Vanetti is going to join us here shortly, and I, I'm eager to ask him all of these questions because I don't fancy him much of a dapper. Do you think? I don't think— I think he's professional at all times, and I do think he can say he's good at his job but would never. Like, have you ever said— Bonetti, have you ever said publicly to anyone, I'm good at my job?

No, I've said it privately when I felt like I've needed to, but not publicly.

No.

Wait, this is public?

In order to save your job, you may have said it to an employer who didn't realize how hard your job was, but that you are at the top of your craft. I can't imagine you saying to anybody, I'm good at my job.

No. And there's also a little bit of like the Kansas, if I claim to be a wise man, that surely means that I don't know, from Carry On, Wayward Son. Like, if you, if you go around saying that, everybody's like, yeah, we've, we've seen this act before.

The, the idea of humility is something I actually want to get into as we talk about whether Pulisic's a jerk or Mbappé's a jerk or Henry Tahirih is a jerk.

Thierry.

Galtieri, excuse me. But the idea that you would dap somebody, Bonetti, are you— when you do a postgame handshake, is it a formal handshake with a briefcase or do you dap them up?

No, I'm basically like Mr. Monopoly. I— when I'm doing a postgame handshake, I have full coat and tails. I doff my cap and I just— I kind of play around with the sides of my mustache. Yeah. And then I say, Good day, fella.

Is it professional? Is this professional? Let's play the video for Bonetti here and ask if it is professional to— Jeremy, take us through what happened here.

Jacob Marcy hit a walk-off. He's been struggling throughout the year. OPS just a tick over .600. And after that game, emotions were high for everybody. I did the postgame interview and at the end of it, there's just a little dap.

So it's what I saw. It's the like kind of like faux individualized handshake thing. Right. That's right.

Yes.

Yeah. My feeling is I'm fine with like a bump, like a, hey, thanks for doing this. But I do— there was a little bit of like we're closing in on personal handshake between you two. Like there's a little extra bro in it for me. And I might or might not be saying this to create controversy, but I'm happy to do it. I just think there was a little bit of a pull at the end there. If we can go ahead and zepruder this thing. There was, there was just a little bit extra that suggests you were pulling it toward you. Yeah, we're developing an individual handshake, and I don't know that I'd want that per se.

As we dissect this more, you see here, Jeremy kind of just holds out his hand for a handshake. That's right. And he takes it to what it becomes. So I'm actually— the more I see this, I'm more on Jeremy's side.

What I think that there isn't— there's almost like a we struck a deal on, on a tract of land here to a squeeze. There's like a little bit of like an affirming of a contract squeeze there too, which I actually, I wonder what you purchased or what he purchased, but there is that there.

You know about that land, man.

Dan, wait a minute. So you've got this as a transaction of real estate in the late 1800s, or is this a recent land transaction?

No, I think all property dates all the way back as far as you can go. So I think it's Revolutionary War period transaction.

So this is your bond. This is my handshake is my bond. We are going into partnership and this stands as a contract if we go to court.

That's right. There was no notary around and nobody had a seal that they could stamp it with and nobody could singe their insignia into the contract. So this is what we had.

This Gen Z predator meme. I don't like it one bit.

I have to salute the video team for doing the investigative work here that really shames Jeremy in a way. That is profound. This is as unprofessional a thing as I have seen done in journalism.

Now that it's been hyperanalyzed this way, I don't, I don't know that it's unprofessional if in fact they were completing a transaction. I think this is definitely within the bounds of what you would do.

I do.

I am a little sympathetic to if I stick out my hand, I am at the mercy of what the other person is going to do with it. So I, I am sympathetic. To that. If I went— if Jeremy went in for the individualized handshake, I would have a problem with that. I don't know that there's intent here.

I keep thinking of the Greg Cody story on Bourbon Street where Ray Lewis is wearing a full mink and he goes to shake hands and bro shrug Greg Cody, and Greg Cody got twisted around and ended up with his back in Ray Lewis's fur.

Like, he got twisted around as if it were a dance because he didn't know how to shake hands correctly.

Here is the meme that we were talking about because I don't think that, uh, I don't think most people know this, Mike. The Schwarzenegger, uh, the idea that all of those guys on that set were doing steroids and Carl Weathers was also like just hugely buff and that that scene was like 10 seconds long of just their muscular arms shaking hands.

Two governors came from this film. Sonny Landham ran for governor.

Do you think most people know what we're talking about there with that scene that lasted?

Yeah, it's iconic. It's become a meme. Most people now just probably know it from the meme.

Yeah.

I feel like though, this reminds me of— didn't you pull the same move with Josh Norman?

Oh no. You guys are going to show the security footage from the Clevelander? Yeah, I think I did. Well, no, I just went in.

Oh, God. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

Oh, turn it off.

He like pulls him closer, like, come to me.

Oh, that's brutal.

They're rocking back and forth.

I think that's against my privacy.

That's surveillance footage. I don't know how you guys got that. You should sue. I should sue. I should sue.

But Nettie, we—

Can I real quick, can I double back to the Greg Cody thing? Did he spin into the coat as though he was turning into Cinderella? Like, you know how, like when Cinderella goes from, you know, local mop girl to princess, right? There's this, there's, there are sparkles and there's a spin, right? And you become, you become some version of an upper crust person by virtue of that spin. Is that what happened to Cody?

Local mop girl?

You had to put it on the poll at Levitar Show. Was Cinderella once a local mop girl? I think this is as, I think this is as smearing as Bonetti has ever been, as indelicate as he's ever been.

Uh, I, I, I want to get to a conversation with you, Jason, about, we, we were having it before you came on about the idea of what's better exercise, walking in a straight line or walking downstairs?

Oh, walking downstairs for sure. There's, there's more of the body being used in walking downstairs, I think. However, however, as you can see in my physique, you know, physical strain isn't a major part of my day as 24 hours elapse. So I would say for me, stairs, I feel is more taxing, but a straight line sometimes can be very difficult for me as well. No, it's actually something that I've always worried about. Have we ever had a discussion about like me getting pulled over after having half a beer?

No.

So I don't walk like everybody else walks. I walk with a limp and my eye drifts and everything. I've always been afraid of being pulled over after any drink of anything because the first test they give you is walk in a straight line. Not happening. The second test is they go like this. They're like, follow my finger. And I, that's not, I'm gonna C+ maybe chance at that. There's that. We need to have less physically stringent tests for DUI in my opinion. Like they should carry a Rubik's Cube.

I am panicky about the backwards alphabet thing.

But then he wants the breathalyzer to be, okay, announce a Major League Baseball game.

Well, I can do that. I can do that right now.

You do that drunk regularly.

Put it on the poll at @LebatardShow. Is the DUI test too physically strenuous? I don't think I've ever heard anyone say that before.

Drifty eye.

Yeah, it's not fair if you have a drifty eye.

It's not fair.

I can't do either of those. I can't do either of those sober. So they're just gonna be like, sir, sir, we know what's going on here, right? The breathalyzer must— they'll look at the breathalyzer, they go, this thing's gotta be broken, right? If I have zero drinks and get pulled over at 1 in the morning, I'm going to prison.

So you had half a beer. Did you indeed get pulled over after half a beer?

No, no, no, no.

My fear has always been if I'm driving to a college game or something at 1 in the morning and I haven't even had a drink, right? That's why I won't have one sip of alcohol before getting behind the wheel ever. Never have, won't do it. Even if I have zero, I am failing the test.

Take a step. We were talking earlier about whether Pete Fairbanks— Jeremy has proclaimed, he has announced to the national audience, because the Marlins are for real, they're a good baseball team, and now some of their pitchers are getting healthy— that Fairbanks has taken a step step, not a leap, not a giant leap, but he has turned a corner. Excuse me, I said I, I, and Chris wondered whether he had taken a step. Are there other things on this hierarchy before taking a step or taking a leap or taking a giant leap or turning a corner? What, what else can go on this hierarchy?

Oh, uh, oh, that's a good one. I gotta think about that though, because that, you know, if the first step of it is showing up to camp in the best shape of your life Right. You can't take a step or turn a corner without showing up to camp in the best shape of your life.

So that's, that's ground zero. That's so that you begin this entire hierarchy with spring training and how you arrive at spring training.

Unquestionably. And then there's this step of sometimes vocalized figuring something out. Right. Usually you've started with a tweak, then you've figured something out, then you turn the corner, corner, then you take a step. Wait a minute. That's kind of how it goes.

Well, wait a minute. So what's the— so between figuring it out, figuring something out, isn't somewhere there some adjustments or those— are you saying tweaks? Tweaks and adjustments are synonyms.

I think, you know, making an adjustment, tweaking something, like, and then at some point there's the aha moment because everybody's gotta be Malcolm Gladwell where it clicks, right? Usually we find out it clicked after we've seen the corner turned or the step taken. But it has to click at some point.

Well, that's at the end though, right? Is that at the top of the hierarchy? Because that's, that's once you've made a giant leap, it's clicked, correct?

Right. But I do think it's usually retroactive. We usually place the date of it clicking at the beginning of the corner that was turned once we go back and see that they were on a hot 10-day stretch, because then you go ask somebody like, hey, what's going on? You've been hot. And they're like, oh, I was I was in Milwaukee and something just kind of clicked. But nothing ever clicks at the moment that it clicks because nobody believes that it's clicked until there are results to prove the click.

Is that right?

Does he have that accurate at the end?

Like that it can't be click verified in the moment. You have to have the result in order for it to have clicked. You would not announce that it would click before it had clicked.

Where's my click? Right, that's clickbait at that point.

Bonetti, thank you for raising money for Greg Cody. You really tickled his narcissisms. You put in a real effort and then quickly forgot about it thereafter.

Sassafras.

Your Tigers had gone on a win streak and you were supposed to do it every game in honor of us, but you forgot it about 3 innings later.

I didn't forget, I was looking, I ran outta stuff. There are a couple on there that are not gonna get into a baseball broadcast no matter how hard I shoehorn the crap A lot of them, actually.

I am remiss in not thanking you for squeezing in Bernie Parmley. We allege that that was the hardest one on the entire list to do. It didn't even make any sense. You honored us greatly when you threw in Bernie Parmley, because I don't know how you did it. It made no sense.

Well, it's because I grew up in the '90s and I had some understanding of why the phrase had happened. I will tell you, though, that even though I didn't say it, I had an umpire tell me a couple of weeks ago that Anthony Rizzo, who does some of these NBC games with us on Sunday went up to him and said at first base when Anthony was playing, he said, where do you buy these clickers? Like, does everybody have a clicker? Meaning the ball strike counter. And the umpire said, they're called indicators, Anthony. To which Rizzo yelled to the rest of his infield mates, hey guys, they're called indicators during the game. Then there was an issue with the count in the game that night. So I say to Rizzo, hey, what are those called? And he had forgotten the story. So I retold him the story and all I was thinking of was the phrase, where's my click click? As I'm telling that story, because that was my way into that phrase was the umpire clicker. And I thought, get out of my skull, all of you people. People were like, you know, it's the same kind of thing like in 1992, you're gonna go to Buffalo with Bernie Parmley?

Amazing.

It is amazing. I don't understand how he did it. There are any number of serious baseball things that we've run out of time to talk to him about. So Verlander, is there ever going to be anything like that again, or has baseball changed too much?

I don't think so, especially with just the demand that he placed on himself to eat up innings. Even one of the things he said yesterday in his press conference, like, even when I wasn't pitching well, I ate up innings for other guys. I don't know that there's that level of, competitive selflessness while also being selfish about your own stuff. I just, I don't know that anybody's going to aspire to that amount of time and that amount of innings anymore because aspirations have changed from go with anybody's young baseball career. So it's the way that players are being reared more than anything. But I also love that he really wants to pitch on a good team still. I, I don't think there's going to be anything like that because I think he's, he's from a former era of growing up.

He has 266 wins right now. Very clearly, there's never going to be a 300-game winner ever again in Major League Baseball. Are there going to be 200-game winners?

Yeah, I think so. I mean, I do think baseball tends to be cyclical. So I, you know, when, when you say that there won't ever be a 300-game winner, that's probably true. But I do wonder, like, if you attach the DH to the pitcher's spot, the starting pitcher's spot. Will teams force themselves to eat more innings with starting pitchers? Will baseball somehow evolve once again to get starting pitchers more innings in the future? I, I just think with the way they're tinkering with the rules, I wouldn't want to foreclose anything.

I would think it would work the other way, that the next evolution or invention in baseball is going to be we're going to go all relievers. We're going to just go all relievers and no starters.

I—

that could be, that could be the next step. And then I think when that either craters or doesn't work for certain teams, somebody's going to whipsaw back and see a possible gap in the marketplace. Again, it's like the Marlins and Rockies calling pitches from the dugout, right? Like a couple of teams do it. They like it or they don't like it. Other teams say that's stupid or we love that or why didn't we think of it? It opens the door, but it also creates a schism. And people like to be on both sides of a schism. That's one. That's, that's one of my hardline beliefs about humanity is people like to be on both sides of a schism. Where are you?

It happened again yesterday, 6 innings of a perfect game. Where are you on the organizational handling of pitchers that makes it so a perfect game, 90 pitches in 7 innings, and you're pulling your pitcher because we're doing load management and this is coming down from on high. The front offices are telling the manager what he has to do.

Here?

Well, I think perfect games are fun and we should aspire to do them. I like them. We should do it. There's— yes, have a hard and fast rule about how many pitches and whatever you want to do. If a guy's perfect through 6 and can, can be in baseball lore, I think you should let him go. I am all for let him go until he gives up a base runner. And if you think he's going to get that tired, right, or he's going to— he's whatever is going to happen. You can't— nobody knows when somebody's going to blow out, right? So let him go until he gives up a base runner. If he's going to get that tired, he's going to walk somebody. He's going to give up a hit. Something's going to happen. I would like pitchers to stay in for that. And I'm not the old schooliest old school person. I just, as a fan, I really like seeing people pursue that.

Good seeing you, Jason. Thank you for making the time for us. Thank you for always being around for us. A legend. Look at that. A legend.

Thanks, guys. Appreciate it. Jeremy, congratulations on your purchase.

Thank you very much.