Transcript of Monster Energy's Jessica Smetana Conference | Hour 3

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I really do think that the United States soccer team met expectations, but unfortunately it feels like our expectations changed once they advanced looking the way they did past the initial round. So I ask you, Mike Ryan, United States soccer this season, success or not a success, this World Cup?

Disappointment. And I don't, I don't, I don't know if it was successful ultimately because of how bad it ended and how just with the politics involved, it just did not feel good. The performance, the, the lack of heart, gutsiness, all the, the bad things that people were saying come to life Worried about Pochettino in big matches, worried about the goalkeeper, worried about Tim Ream, worried about Pulisic's health, worried about the intestinal fortitude and the maturity of this team. All that stuff playing out in such a nasty fashion. And then for a group of people that don't like, you know, politics with their sport, for it to come out and grab it by the throat and inject itself into what was feeling good, just crazy. You guys, they burned up so much goodwill.

You guys are saying it got ruined in 48 hours.

It's the only way. It's the only way that I would have said it's a disappointment. It was a disaster. It was a disaster.

You—

the only time you can get into that match was for 60 fleeting seconds.

How can anything be considered a success if it ends in embarrassment?

They met expectations, I thought, right up until we changed the expectations.

But that's a success to you, meeting expectations or exceeding them?

I mean, exceeding expectations would be more of a success, but meeting expectations— to me, disappointment is not meeting expectations. That's almost textbook definition of what disappointment is. So I guess we can get caught on the line between it wasn't a success and it wasn't a failure, but you guys are saying the punctuation overshadows everything before it. They were playing the biggest game I've ever seen them play. Yeah, they shit the bed in that game, but it's the most important game I've seen this country play soccer.

They're still stuck in the round of 16 though.

Men's side, I should say.

Men's side.—

it's not even, in retrospect, given how it ended up, not even the most impactful game against Belgium in the World Cup over the last 20 years, because at least the last, the Tim Howard team fought like hell. That Łondalowski had an opportunity at the end, that team showed grit. It was narrative-changing. I have not seen one even casual observer of this World Cup say, hey man, that felt good. No, that's how badly it ended.

Yeah, and I, I just I think it is funny, though, that if I'd ask all of you, hey, going into the game, success so far? The answer is yes.

So far.

I know. And the answer would also be yes, you said, if I said they lost 1-0, or they lost in PKs, or they lost in overtime. You got your heart broken. But you're saying the combination of the president of the United States stepping in with them having an assortment of embarrassments, that makes it the worst loss in the knockout round, correct? I'm trying to go through my head here in the library. There was there Was there a loss where a team looked worse in the knockout round than losing 4-1? There was a 3-0 in there, but a 4-1, uh, and that way where you look just amateur in a couple spots and your, and your alleged best player is leaving the field early to an assortment of howls from every voice speaking about American soccer.

Yeah, they in that round, they looked like they didn't belong. I don't know how that's success if the end result is you didn't belong.

They look worse than Canada did. Canada at least looked good for a half and they got to talk themselves into it. Their American manager said, I'd rather be us at the end of it. There was just no fight there.

Yeah, I agree from the very beginning. And they— there were 2 minutes in that game where fans had a chance to feel good. 2 minutes in that game when they, when they tied it, it just— they didn't— it's like they didn't even show up. For the biggest game, and they had such an opportunity to finally defeat the round of 16 and get into the quarterfinals. Such an opportunity. And that's when they had a chance to fully arrive, because in the quarterfinals, if they beat a giant like Spain, then the whole world is saying, "U.S. soccer is here." They were one win away from having that chance, and they absolutely blew it. Biggest game in 20 years.

I don't understand the commentary about how— what a huge mistake it was for, you know, with the politics getting involved, it fired up the Belgium team. They're in the World Cup. We're in the round of 16. The Belgium team needed— like, that gave them a boost? They needed to be fired up?

They say so.

Yes.

I agree.

But that's just a sports thing to say. Bulletin board material.

No, the whole world's out there conspiring against us in an unprecedented move. We're gonna show their asses.

Who we are.

We beat them the last time, we'll beat them again. In sports, you look for whatever edge that you can, and yes, we might be playing the result, but look, they showed us not once but twice, once on the field and in the locker room, they were doing the double jerk-off dance.

Yeah, if I'm the Belgian coach, I am really emphasizing the fact that we're on United States soil and the United States president just worked back channels to get a red card lifted from their leading goal scorer.

So now they really want to win the World Cup?

No, they always did, but that's extra incentive.

Alright, let's bring in Jessica here. She's laughing at the phrasing of the double jerk-off dance. Also put it on the poll @LebatardShow. In the internet age, are we still doing bulletin board material? Because I think we need to kind of retire that phrase. Are we still doing bulletin boards? Are people still using bulletin boards? Do any of you— put this on the poll as well— do you have a bulletin board? Yes or no. Wanna include Jessica on a couple of these conversations we've been having. First of all, cold bacon or hot bacon? Which is better?

Hot. No, no. You know what? I'm gonna challenge you, Jess. Have you ever had cold bacon, intentionally cold bacon?

I've had bacon once it's like cooled to room temperature.

Yeah, that's not enough.

Here's the thing.

You want it like cold though.

Yeah, put it in the fridge for 10 minutes. Okay. And then try it.

Well, I probably had it on a BLT or something.

There you go. That's a good example of cold bacon really being serviceable and useful to its community.

I love BLTs.

But if you're at a restaurant—

Extremely underrated.

Like a fresh one at a restaurant, the bacon's still a little warm.

You get that like cold of everything else with the little slightly warm bacon.

The stront, where you're in a big hurry. That's the time you choose to be efficient.

Play on.

I like that.

I'm gonna start calling them stronts.

I don't get it.

Jessica, I've got a number of things that I want to talk to you about, but let's begin with these Yormarks that this show has a lot of animosity toward, an assortment of Yormarks who have business-ified sports in a way that is unpleasant. Do you have any thoughts on Brett Yormark?

I do, Dan. There was a moment yesterday in Big 12 Media Days that reminded me of what I think is maybe Mike Ryan's favorite viral video relating to an airplane. So let's play the clip. And see if Mike Ryan knows what I'm talking about. It's a very awkward clip.

Rockin' pregame. Commissioner, Texas Tech got fined over tortillas, and tortillas were banned outright. OSU paddles broken always make a rule, has a tradition exemption. Swordsby never played a snap for the Red Raiders. Big 12 sued them anyway, while Cincinnati hasn't been yet touched. You're selling greater than 12. Why should Texas Tech fans believe it?

Can you sit?

Let me come closer to you.

Stand up.

Ask that question again and I'm going to give you the answer I want to give you, so go ahead.

Texas Tech got fined for tortillas and tortillas were banned outright. OSU has had paddles that were given a noisemaker exemption back in 2012. Swordsby never played snap for the Red Raiders, and yet there is a lawsuit. Cincinnati has yet to be touched. You're selling greater than 12. Why should Texas Tech fans believe them?

No, I didn't say greater than 12. You misquoted me. I said we're going forward is 16 strong. And that's my answer to your question. But thank you for that question. Appreciate it.

I want to shake your hand.

Yes.

I want to shake your hand.

Stand up.

That was—

again, stand up.

Jess, that was so excruciating.

The people behind—

there were so many people with their hands, their faces in their hands. That was in the— He screwed up on tortillas twice after he stood up.

Tortillas? What is he calling them? Tortillas?

That went on forever, Jess.

It was a lot. I know, before the show Chris Cody is like, hey, this video is a minute and a half long, should we trim it? I was like, no, you gotta watch the whole thing. It's so awkward. So this is a Texas Tech media personality asking Brett Yormark, basically like trying to confront him over the lack of punishment for Cincinnati because of the Brendan Sorsby thing, bringing up the, you know, very controversial banning of throwing tortillas on the field, equating it to Oklahoma State's paddle people. And Brett Yormark's reaction is, stand up, say that again to me, ask me that question again. And then he asks it again and it's awkward again the second time, and he kind of stumbles through it. And, uh, Brett Yormark just kind of was like, that's— you misquoted me, that's not what I said. And then that was the end of it. And then he also earlier in Big 12 Media Days was like, now's not the time to talk about Brandon Soaresby, now's the time to celebrate the season that we're about to have. Which is like, I feel like this is the time.

Like, media day, 12 media days.

Oh, talk about it.

When is the time, Brad? Josh Pate has been very critical of this deal. On the surface, I get it. I don't know why they, they did this. Was this a bad deal signed by Brett Yormark?

Are you talking about the $20 million Monster Energy branding deal that they did, Mike? Because it does seem like a shockingly small amount of money for what is a league-wide Monster Energy partnership. Dan, I don't know if this is going to make you really sad or not, but this year there's going to be brand patches on college football uniforms. I've seen the Wisconsin Culver's one, which I love Culver's, so part of me is like, mm, kind of makes my mouth water. But then part of me is like, I don't like this. I don't want to bring patches to college football uniforms. But in the Big 12, what was announced yesterday is that they're doing this league-wide Monster Energy partnership, but it's only worth— it's only a deal worth $20 million and spread across like 16 teams, it just doesn't seem like a lot of money. They're putting it on the fields, they're putting on the uniforms. And yeah, Mike, it has been criticized to the point where I'm like, maybe there's more details about this that I just don't know yet because it feels like a lot— not a lot of money.

Who's going to call it the Monster Energy Big 12 Football Conference? Is that who's— who's obligated to call it that?

TV, apparently. Yeah.

Any—

any Big 12 affiliated. Yeah, I I don't know if Fox is going to do it, but like, yeah, any Big 12 affiliated partner, I guess, would call it that. Or in like official press releases, I guess you would call it that. It doesn't really roll off the tongue.

But Greg, did you just give that the back of your hand? The worst of the Greg Cody indignities to wave your hand in the back of your hand at something. Why did you do that?

Because when we're starting to advertise on uniforms, I think we have crossed a line. Not previously crossed, but I want to tell fans something. You're not obligated to call a stadium after a sponsor. Like, like, just use a totally random example. You don't have to say Lone Depot Park if you don't want to. You can say Marlins Park. Okay? You're not entitled. You're not obligated to fall like a lemming over a cliff and use these corporate ties.

Why are you looking at him this way as Jessica brays in his face?

Such a strange stance to take. You don't have to call the stadium stadium or the arena by their names?

No, you don't. You can call it Joe.

I would Greg.

There you go. Thank you, Jess. Appreciate that.

Thank you, Greg.

Sometimes I will go out of my way to not say a brand name if I'm like, this just sounds stupid. I'm not doing that. They're not paying. They're not paying me.

I'm not a—

I'm not an M asterisk E asterisk partner. I don't have to say the name of their drink.

Yeah, I'm not even taking a loan from Depot.

Okay.

Why am I calling it Loan Depot?

You guys are getting a little bit precious though about the sponsorships. My favorite detail on this is I remember when Penn State was doing, hey, we don't put anybody's name on the back of the jerseys, but it had the Nike swoosh on the jersey while they wouldn't put the names on the jersey. We've been doing this game for a while, uh, sort of hiding, and now it's just coming because they need to pay for everything. And so it's going to become the Monster Energy Big 12 Football Conference, and you're gonna— and sponsorships on the back.

Is there a single fan in the Big 12 who's going to start calling it the Monster Energy Big 12? One person.

I want to meet.

I'm only going to call it by that. I love it. I call them Lenovo Match Breaks and I throw up the 4. I like it.

No, but this is the—

Powerade Hydration Breaks.

Like the bowl games. Okay. When it used to— is it Capital One? You know, the Capital One.

Capital One.

Well, you used to use FedEx.

You know what it is.

Capital One Orange Bowl. Like, We don't call it the Capital One. We call it the Orange Bowl.

Right. Yeah. So that's what I'm saying. Fans are not obligated to— again, with following these things, it's worth—

I like it.

It's worth emphasizing because it's not said enough.

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I know it well. It's usually when I show up, everybody goes crazy.

Yeah, you usually take all the credit for it, but it's because Tony usually walks in with Cuervo. I walk in like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cuervo is the thing that turns hanging out into this is the night.

It has that effect on people.

It does. You usually take the credit for it, but again, it's the Cuervo effect. It's like that moment in a big game where everyone in the crowd just starts standing up, hooting and hollering. Keep it Cuervo!

Keep it Cuervo, baby!

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Dan Levitar.

I heard that as a woman faking, uh, pain. I, I, I didn't think that sounded real. I really didn't, you know.

It was not fake. It was in no way fake.

You can spot a woman faking it?

Great, Cody.

Yes, I can, Jess. I've been married 40 years.

This is the Dan Levitar Show. So what do you call when you're going to the Dolphins game?

What do you—

where do you say— your wife says, hey, where are you going?

What do you say? Dolphin Stadium.

Really?

If I'm in a good mood, I'll call it Joe Robbie Stadium.

Only if I'm in a good— that was like 9 names ago.

Damn right it was.

What about a bad—

you're gonna call it Land Shark?

No, call it by its name.

Doesn't make it light.

I mean, hey, Look, as, as corporate nicknames go, I happen to like Hard Rock Stadium. I think it fits football, the gridiron, hard rock.

DraftKings Stadium would be much better.

It would be much better. I would call it DraftKings Stadium.

Now available in all 50 states.

But some of these, some of these names— Kasaya Center. What is the Kasaya? What is that company?

So what do you call it then?

The Heat Arena. I call it the Heat Arena.

So weird.

You've been FIFA World Cup— sounds like one word— long before everybody else was.

The Heat Arena.

It's the Heat Arena. Don't make it right.

Isn't it Kaseya?

Ooh, what is that? It is. What is Kaseya? Haaland.

That's how you Kaseya it.

Excuse me, Haaland.

I got that right. I'm not backing off on that.

3 A's.

There are 3 A's. How many A's in Kaseya?

How many A's in Holland? 1, not 3. Jessica, do you have any interesting observations on the Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce wedding? I don't know what was the most shocking of the details. Let's play some sound here of Charles Barkley.

They just invited him.

Invited a bunch of famous people, whether they have relationships with them or not. Let's get some sound here of Charles Barkley on Philadelphia sports radio saying that he turned down this invitation.

So you didn't get the invite to the royal wedding at Madison Square Garden?

That I did.

Oh, you did get the invite. You didn't go?

I don't go to weddings. That's one of them. I don't go to weddings or funerals, but I did get an invite and I politely declined because I thought it was going to be a crap show. And like, uh, I love Travis and Jason, and I've only met Taylor one time. But yeah, I did get an invite, but I said, hey, you know what, that's just too much. I just want to hang out and play golf, and I don't want to dress up and all that other stuff. Jessica, what were your interesting takeaways from the wedding?

For one, I mean, it was Fourth of July weekend, so hanging out and playing golf, definitely a good choice by Chuck. Dan, isn't it weird that this wedding was just all A-list celebrities, like thousands of them. Like, isn't it weird that like Juju Smith-Schuster was at a wedding with like Lena Dunham? Like, I don't know.

And actually, Dean Blandino—

Dean Blandino sent me over the edge. You know, I have to say, actually, Lena Dunham actually I think is a friend of Taylor Swift, and Juju Smith-Schuster, a teammate of Travis Kelce. So maybe that's a bad example. Maybe those two would have been on the invite list if it was like a 300-person wedding, which is still big, But it's just weird to me that all these like Fox and CBS personalities were there and Andy Reid getting the British paparazzi shot.

George Neapolitan was there.

When you're a prime minister about to resign, this is what happened. This is the photo that the British paps take of you. It's just— it was a weird mix of people and just too many of them. And I think Chuck is right. It did sound like a crap show because 20-minute-long vows. Each, Dan. I mean, you are a wife guy. I doubt your vows were even that long.

No, I've got to wrap that up. You got to get through all of that. Nobody wants to sit through all of that. What happened with Lena Dunham, though? She made everyone uncomfortable, didn't she?

She apparently made a joke at the rehearsal dinner calling football, uh, gay, like a performance of gay porn or some something along those lines that apparently made a lot of the football players in the room cringe, which is very— and then she sort of like referenced it on her Instagram later, which is very like Lena Dunham like to do. It probably was kind of funny, but, you know, got to hand it to her on that one.

You've never made that reference, Dan?

I've made it of MMA, not of professional football.

No.

Can you tell me—

She's good at making people uncomfortable.

Can you tell me what happened, or have you read any of the details as to why Adam Sandler was the officiant of this wedding?

Do you yabba dabba doo? That's what I'm picturing this wedding officiating, like, look who's here, it's Timothée Chalamet. Like, what a ridiculous officiant for your wedding. Does anyone know why they picked Adam Sandler?

I don't. I was asking you because I haven't read anything.

I don't know.

I don't have anything.

It feels like Travis got to pick like 2 things. They drove out in some cool sports car and Adam Sandler was the officiant. Other than that, it's all Travis.

I read something that one of his movies is like their favorite together or something along those lines.

Well, and Travis Kelce was in the Happy Gilmore. 2. Yeah.

Yeah, but that's not a reason to make someone— that is not—

I know.

Why was Robin Roberts there?

You're—

you're officially—

America people were there.

I'm friends with Pablo.

The friends of that—

maybe they're friends with the Sandman.

You think— you think Taylor Swift is friends with the Sandman? Uh, what are your thoughts?

Weird. Dan, I'm sorry, I just have to say, I sound like a hater. Maybe I am. People are going to be mad at me for this. That's fine. It's weird. The whole thing was weird.

I'm with you, Jess.

Just go with it.

What are your thoughts on us every 4 years having exactly the same conversation about the US men's soccer team?

Do people— I mean, I maybe I shouldn't be talking because I have a goldfish brain, but does everyone else also have a goldfish brain? Because I feel like we just rehash. Or maybe everyone online is like, 18 or 19, and so they just don't really remember the last World Cup when we did the same exact thing where we were like, youth sports are too expensive. There's a lot of options for young boys to play different sports in this country. It's not our biggest sport. It's not our biggest priority. But why are the girls better? But the, the women's team does this. It's just like we do the same thing every 4 years, Dan. And I'm, I'm exhausted by the conversation, to be honest with you. And I also want to go back to Zaz's point about bulletin board material. Do you not think that athletes get motivated by things outside of games? To give them extra motivation in a game like that is something that athletes talk about all the time.

Yes, I think there's motivation. But this idea, Jess, that now, like, they really wanted to win the World Cup originally, but now, like, they really want to win the World Cup.

That's dumb to me.

It's a, it's a long tournament. Like, every little extra bit helps when you're in a foreign country for weeks and you have to find new motivation, not just like in every, every round of the tournament, but like every minute of the game. You, when your body is tired and you are out there physically performing. Like, every little thing does help. It's not like they didn't already want to beat the US, but they did sort of make us look like fools because we were not up for the moment. And they clearly— like, that galvanized their team, I think, pretty evidently.

Right. But us not being up for the moment has nothing to do with Belgium and how hard Belgium wanted to play because they were extra motivated. Like, like you said it, and I agree, the US was not up for the moment.

I disagree.

I think it put a lot of pressure on the US because they became, you know, it was, I think, maybe it— maybe this isn't the main reason that they lost. I don't think that it is, but I do think they had a lot of pressure on them because of the scandal surrounding the red card and this paused suspension. And I think that that would make me— if I were a player and I knew everyone was mad at my team and mad at my teammate, mad at our federation and mad at our president, and, you know, we're in front of our home fans and we have to prove that we belong here despite all of that, and despite the fact that, like, we're, you know, we're the home team, we got an easier draw in the group round stage, and this is the game that will determine successful or not successful by a lot of standards. I don't know. I think that would probably put a lot of pressure on me. And then if you on the other side of that, you see Belgium like, all right, we're going to prove that these guys are jokers.

Kind of think they go hand in hand, as does the double jerk-off dance.

Thank you, Jessica. Good to see you. It's the weekly Notre Dame podcast. The Echoes is not, not, not an echo with Mike Golick Jr. She does it weekly. Appreciate the time, Jessica. So we are now upset about sponsorships on uniforms and the Monster Energy drink Big 12 conference because we need to pay for everything because it is obviously professional sports. And we say it all the time around here, but I don't know how many people really absorb it. College football is America's second most favorite and most popular sport. It's, it's football, professional football, and then college football. And everything else would have to be a distant went third.

Right. I agree with that. But at some point, a line has to be drawn, or maybe not. Like, when are the New York Yankees— when is the name New York Yankees going to have a sponsor's name in front of it? Where during a telecast, all of a sudden, "And the Gatorade New York Yankees have taken a 3-2 lead. We'll be back in a moment." I mean, at some point you have to draw a line and say, "No, let's keep this sacrosanct." —but I don't see that.

Mention Spider-Man on the bases.

We have the New York Knicks brought to you by Abu Dhabi, and we didn't really care about that, did we? Why do you have to draw a line?

You understand that all of this stuff is super expensive. You understand that the rules are being made up as we go along. I thought somehow that in that press conference where that guy was talking about tortillas, that I thought that Jormach was the one who looked like a fool up there doing his Jormach suit dance in his overly pressed suit. Ask that question again so I can be guy who prowls around on stage, like just super business.

Side talk headset.

I mean, that guy, that whole family. That's how they have Thanksgiving. All of them walk around like that around the table. Say that again. Walk around like that. Say that again so that I can answer not cleverly while looking clever, thinking I'm clever. What is that? Ask that question again, tortillas. How did that guy pronounce that twice that way?

What a bad one from that guy, huh? Especially if you're a Red Raider guy. You should know tortillas.

Uh, what? What?

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Dan Levitar, if I may say for a second, Miami, they were simulating the snap count the entire game and they were clapping at the line of scrimmage. And the only thing I want to see clapping are them cheeks on Mrs. Met in my face, Mike Schur.

All right, so that's one thing.

Jessica Esmeralda, they're a bunch of cheaters, Dan. And you know who should be cheating? Mrs. Met on Mr. Met, and he can watch if he wants.

This is the Dan Levatar Show.

Conor McGregor returns this weekend. Uh, Conor McGregor has not won a fight in how long? Has it been 5 years since Conor McGregor?

He hasn't been in the octagon since 2021 when he lost to Dustin Poirier and broke his leg and Joe Rogan famously laid down next to him.

I'm so offended with what I saw from Conor McGregor yesterday, can I tell you, Dan? Please. Like, he showed up to whatever it was, and you know, he, he's gonna do a bunch of signings, and it's the deal where, all right, they want him to sign like 1,000 different posters. So it's a stack of posters and he signs and they pull it out and he signs and pull it— you know, you know what I'm talking about. This was his signature every time.

Checkmark.

That's an autograph? He's a—

And yet how much is he being paid for that? It's offensive to me.

How is that your autograph? Write your name!

I mean, if you gotta do it 10,000 times, you probably get a simple font.

Then don't take the money! If you're gonna do autographs, do autographs! He literally—

That's what the money's for!

Just did a line. It would be better if he had a stamp of his own.

It would be, actually. It's offensive to me that that's an autograph.

Well, more importantly, he's returning for the first time in 5 years, the biggest star in the sport, bigger than the sport itself. And it feels like it's been like very calm, like nobody's really talked about it. Obviously the World Cup has taken precedent and NBA free agency and like all these things have been happening. But Dan, I think Conor McGregor's got his head on his shoulders, kind of screwed on straight. You haven't really heard a lot of the boisterous coke allegedly talk. You haven't heard like his outlandish comments and the things that he usually does. He's a man of God now. Man of God. Seems that things have changed. Oh, like Russell Brand. His fight camp has been completely, uh, kind of under the radar. He's doing night runs. Like, I think Conor McGregor might be back. Alien! Come on, man. I think he might be back, Dan.

He might, he might have sold me. He is very clearly trying to reshape his public image. Okay. And perhaps make his life better. Maybe he has. It does seem like a playbook. But we'll, we'll see how it plays out. You're so cynical, though.

I'm not— with reason. I'm not being actually cynical about whether he's a changed man or not. I have seen all of the videos. The internet is resplendent with examples of Conor McGregor seeming coked out. I actually understand when anyone in that sport decides to self-medicate, however they self-medicate, because whatever the pain is, I'm strictly looking at this on merit. This person does not deserve to still be the biggest star in the sport based on the resume that measures fighting. Like, the guy has not fought in forever, and I don't want any more Carano freak shows. Like, the idea that this guy is living off the fumes of his fame— don't give me the last time he fought, give me the last time he won a fight.

Give me the— He beat Cowboy Cerrone, I want to say, in 2020. So, talk about 6 years.

Okay, like, that is a comeback fight, Dan, and you've often referenced George Foreman's comeback in combat sports. You can take a comeback fight seriously. Sometimes it's because they've been locked up, sometimes it's because they need money, sometimes it's because they want to see if they still got it. But this is a trope that, that has been covered seriously several times out.

This could be a massive draw, right? Huge.

Plus he's fighting Max Holloway, which is a great stylistic fight for him. Both guys stand up, both guys are going to trade absolute bang.

There is a lot going on though. I mean, we've seen it. Serena, it went quietly. I did that— having this happen on the last double match day of the World Cup.

Yeah, Mike, but you're bringing up Serena, and look how she looked after that layoff. She's won more recently than Conor McGregor. Like, that's, that's what they look like after those kinds of layoffs.

Yeah, but they didn't handpick opponents for Serena to look good and make some more money. They're doing that with Conor because it's a gravy train.

This is not, though, the best of fighting. It's not the best of mixed martial arts. It's just two names who are strikers getting in an octagon, and this is—

Well, Max still has it, Dan.

Yeah, we like it. Again, my controversial opinion, I like watching people fight for money. And if you're telling me that if there is any truth to Conor McGregor cleaning up his act and focusing on training when he was very clearly one of the lead examples on, well, this guy's got some off-the-court stuff, this guy's got distractions, maybe it's playing into why he's diminished so much in the octagon. Can he lock back in? His style can age with grace. He can still pack a punch. He can still strike if he's locked in. I like to see it. So I get the curiosity. I think this is closer to Tyson coming back than it was to, you know, Mike Tyson coming back against Jake Paul.

100%. And to quote Amin, who I think quotes Family Guy, it's like anything could be behind that door. It could even be a boat. Like, we could see Conor McGregor be the Conor McGregor of old.

And for one night, we can't—

for one night in Las Vegas, Dano, which is going to be incredible. The vibes, the views, everything is going to be amazing. What if Conor lands a left hand that knocks out McGregor?

This is not going to be the Conor McGregor of old. It's just going to be an old Conor McGregor. You cannot have these kinds of layoffs and all sorts of questions about whether or not you're using a bunch of blow and whether you're addicted to blow or not and have this kind of layoff and have anything in the tank.

You thought Mike Tyson was going to kill Jake Paul. Yeah, you, you covered— I remember that. You covered George Foreman with reverence and did really good work around him.

Jake Paul's not a real fighter. Like, this is the next holiday.

Holloway, like, he's hand-picked. He's hand-picked. It's gonna be good. There's a curiosity there. There's not like, oh, this is Gina Carano train wreck. And if it is, then that's it, we're done. Maybe they feed them to somebody else. Maybe they feed them to Paddy. And don't tell me that people still won't pay to watch a washed-up co-main event against Benoît Saint-Denis. Damn, like, people will still— he is a draw in a sport that has felt his lessons. And if he has cleaned up his act, if he can put up a good fight that is not embarrassing, hell, if he wins, heaven help you, because you're going to be seeing a hell of a lot more of him.

I think all of these comebacks in this situation, all they have going for them is the curiosity factor. And it was that way with Serena. And by the way, Serena's opponent was just tailor-made for her to win. Okay, they didn't arrange it like that, but it was. Her opponent was ranked 87th in the world. She had never won anything. Serena was built to win that, but she was 44 years old. She hadn't competed in 4 years, and it looked like it. And I think when, in this case, you root against Conor McGregor, I think. I don't know that he's likable.

I think you root for him to win. I mean, this is a guy across the way who's Max Holloway, another legend of the sport. You're rooting for the sport though, Tony. You just, you think the sport needs it. I'm a man of the shield. Yeah, like the NFL. I like to watch good games, like college football. I like to watch good games. Like, my rooting interest doesn't really matter. But like, to have Conor McGregor walk out for possibly the last time and do what he can maybe do is land a left hand that can sleep Max Holloway, who was only previously knocked out one time in his entire career by Ilia Topuria. We're having a legendary moment, Dan. I thought that's what sports was for you, is the legend is the guy that maybe he can have one more last run.

It's usually not 6 years between wins, like, in anywhere, anywhere in sports. It's generally not something that I'm watching anywhere in sports.

Rocky Balboa Boateng did against Mason 'The Line' Dixon. What a name. That's a great— Mason 'The Line' Dixon.

That's a name. It's been one of the great story arcs of the entire World Cup. This older generation, do they got one more in them? Does Ronaldo have one more in them? Does Luka Modric have one more in them? Does James Rodríguez have one more in them? Now, the answer for all of those, a resounding no. But with Messi, guy seems to have 12 more in them.

Get me the way that that reporter pronounced tortillas. Tortillas. How does that happen? Tortillos. He said it that way both times. Does he have a stutter? No, no, that is not a stutter. He said it that way twice. He said he only stuttered on that word that way twice.

Tortillos.

It's like he's trying to like screw that up. Like that seems purposeful.

Tortillos. Not that tough a word.

He did it twice too.

It's like hard to do it twice. Tony has a top 5 winners of this World Cup. Are you guys ready for this? Top 5 winners. I can't imagine that he's got a winner bigger bigger than Messi.

Ooh, not on the list, Dan. Messi, not on the list right now. Nope. It was, it was my total, my World Cup winner so far. We're starting the OLI. The US team for 61 seconds after the equalizer. It was even, but it felt like a win for 61 seconds. I went to the bathroom and then I came back and they scored and I was like, what happened? It's like, my wife's like, yeah, they scored. And I was like, oh, you know, that guy's German.

I knew it.

See, this is why I like the hydration breaks. If you waited for the hydration break, you go to the bathroom, you wouldn't miss anything.

I know, 100%. I also didn't think they were going to score in 61 seconds after the US equalized it with a ball that ricocheted off the guy that they brought in's head. Uh, number 5, Cabo Verde, winners of the World Cup. Yes, eliminated, had an incredible game against Argentina. Now everybody knows what the place was because nobody knew what it was before, right?

Tied Spain.

Zaz, they have great fans.

I know, some good fans, right? Fans, I know.

Number 4, 4 winners of the World Cup. The cameraman. I can hear you tell me they always find it. How? Great shout. How do they always find it?

Number 3.

Do you think the production, like, like, room is as lecherous as you think? Like, yes. Yeah, they say, hey, like, hey, there's a good one.

Section 12. Yeah, yeah, row 9.

Yes, they always find it somehow. Spotter. That dude looks so lecherous. Number 3. Let's pull up.

Let's pull up this Mexican fan who is one of the winners of the World Cup. See, he's here just normal, just hanging out, doing his thing. Oh, a beer passes by. Wait a second.

I got a long straw. Wow. Wow. Oh my God.

Yes, sir. See, Dan, the trick is you get the Mexican flag, but it's a long straw. Wow. Somebody walks by with an open beer.

That guy is a thief. A bit Looney Tunes.

Yeah, genius.

Notice MrBeast is in that shot for some reason.

Very weird.

Uh, here we go, a little slurp here.

That's excellent work. That is a very long straw that he stole some beer out of.

A little too much foam, you saw.

Yeah, I did see that.

Number 2 winners of the World Cup: anybody who had a small follower count that now has a massive follower account. This guy I think was the goalie for the world— for the, uh, Cape Verde team. 27 million followers. You don't have to do soccer anymore. You don't really have to do anything anymore. You just become an influencer with that amount of followers. People pay you whatever for that amount of eyeballs.

Being linked to Inter Miami, Fosinha.

Number 1 winner of the World Cup, Haaland. He's been the winner, Dan. Every, every video, every meme, every row, every everything is Erling on.

Look at that Adam's apple. He's got a lot of Gronk in him personality-wise.

He'd be a great tight end if he was born in America. He'd be one of the best tight ends of football.

But he's got— he's just the way that he interviews, uh, sort of a playful meathead that everyone loves who's a little—

looks at his own reflection, says what's up to it.

Strange and wonderful as well. A lot of surface area on all of those, uh, forehead headers. Tortillos.