This is the Dan Lebatard Show with the Stugatz Podcast.
Draft night is tonight. Hope, chaos, and one more chance for the Dolphins to finally get it right. We'll see. Draft Watch presented by Bucked Up tonight, 7:45 Eastern on YouTube at Lebatard Show.
I want to talk about, uh, some of the basketball from last night, and we will get to that in a second. Uh, the Suns are really mad about the officiating. Uh, they're doing something. This is very early in the playoffs for this. They're going to be fines involved with this, and they don't have a chance of any kind in this series. It's the only way for them to make it interesting is to do what they're doing with the officiating. Two games in, they have no chance. If they— if the officials do not help them, they cannot win that series. There are not enough injuries that Oklahoma City can have that the Suns will win that series. But just getting back to the humanity of what it is that we are just talking about, just From what you guys imagine, I know they're all just stories and content and they're not human beings, they're here for us to cluck about and the internet likes to dunk on people, but would you not imagine just hypothetically that whatever it is that Mike Vrabel is feeling right now, uh, this is the weakest Mike Vrabel has ever felt?
You could just imagine it, right? Yeah. Like just all of how that feels. You've never seen a Mike Vrabel or thought of a Mike Vrabel as frail as this one is. Getting managed, getting advice from every side, and has to go home at night being forced to do things he definitely doesn't want to do. I want you to now examine when you, when you do this with these coaches about how they're tough and they lead and everything else, they're tougher than everyone else in one very small sphere. It's a very small place because this kind of stuff will make anybody crumble. There is not a tough enough, a leader enough, a strong enough to endure how this hits at home and how it hits it with your co-workers and how it hits with societies laughing at you after you told everybody kind of defiantly, and you got 20 years of Patriot Way behind you when you say it. So you're bringing all of this when you say laughable. You say in our face, laughable, and now the world just crushes you. Like, big tough champion Vrabel, like, now, okay, now, now we were already enjoying this because it's human nature to see everybody, everything fall apart in your life, champion guy.
Like, I, when I see that happen and I, I hear about how we talk about these coaches demanding the accountability of others, the who are actually physically hurting during the week, always demanding the accountability of others. This is your leader. Patriots Way. And you tried to kill the photos and Patriots Way like this. This is your face and you're hiding him on day 3. You're, you're hiding him from us on day 3 and sending out missives in the middle of the night about counseling.
I mean, this kind of is the Patriots Way, right? Like espionage, counterintelligence, If you ain't cheating, you ain't trying. This is now to the nth degree of that. I think that if I was going to look at a, like, the lowest moral franchise in the NFL, I would be looking at the Patriots regardless of the red, white and blue of it all.
Murder.
Yes.
It is interesting though, because like, like we mentioned earlier, I thought his statement was effective in making it go away. It wasn't favorable at all to whatever Diana was going through, and that was really unfortunate for her. But it was super effective in like, all right, we're moving on. And then it got brought back and it opens the door to what else is going on here. And that's where you ask questions like, is this bad PR or is this PR trying to get out in front of something?
Well, and on top of that, I was thinking about, okay, say that this occurred and it occurred for a long period of time. Just hypothetically, that is a, is a massive relational breach. You don't throw somebody under the bus if it's been something that you've developed over time.
When family's involved, and probably a lot is made out of the, the ethical breach that this is for Diana. But if you're the New England Patriots and if all this stuff is true and Mike Vrabel has that type of relationship with reporter, that does raise concern.
But see, this is the place, though, that I've Look, I've done it clumsily because all of this is uncomfortable for me. But in journalism, this is what the standard is on conflict of interest. There's not an argument that can be made around Vrabel right now that he wasn't engaged in a conflict of interest. But the standards here make it fireable investigation. And the standards here make, hey, coach, we'll try and hide it for you. Like, here, we'll hide you on draft day. Well, we'll try and we'll try and do this with you because you're our leader.
I do want to parse this because, look, the Miami Heat are very— are a very a secretive organization, and if they found a leak, there would be some kind of punitive measure if someone was actively leaking something. Now, I don't know, it's unfair to say that person would be fired.
To trust that that person would not work in that organization if they had somebody, anybody— I've got, I've got 30 years of relationships in that building. They don't tell me things. Like, that's not how that works. Like, nobody's— that organization is sealed tight there. Woj and Shams didn't have access. To the things happening in that organization.
Especially when you add this era can monetize on all of that information. You can put it out and actually get money for those clicks that you snuck that information from. So it's sticky.
What do you make of the entirety, though, the talk of just conflict of interest? We cannot argue, right, like, that it doesn't matter. Whenever these things happen, we say, well, what if the person was better at what they did, right? Stephon Diggs is let go. Well, would he have been let go if it had been 1,700 yards instead of of 1,000 because he was a distraction. How good does Vrabel have to be for the standard to be, we'd be willing to let you go over a morals clause. You're our leader. You can't be our leader and have the cover-up be just as bad as the crime, because laughable is where this started. Laughable. When the doors— when the paid photos showed up at your doorstep— paid photos, I keep saying that because that wasn't journalism once upon a time— paid photos, and what's being brought to your doorstep is, who did this? Who's doing this? At the very core of whatever the privacy mystery is, right? Who's hiring somebody to take these photos that are being brought to you and now wrecking lives, right? Like shaking lives.
I can confirm lives have been wrecked.
And no, but I mean, and Vrabel, tough leader guy, weakened in front of all of it because now the full weight of whatever is our attention of the NFL on draft day, you've taken over the news stream as a distraction. You like—
and this is the first time in the entire saga that we are focusing on Mike Vrabel now. Yes, because Vrabel, like, it's incredible the juice nationally that Diana Rossini has. Like, this caught me by surprise. Mike Vrabel was coaching in a Super Bowl in the totem pole of fame. Mike Vrabel is so much more famous than Diana Rossini. And yet it was Diana Rossini, not just with the magazine and the aggregate sites, But in social media, Vrabel was kind of skating.
Do we know if the report is true that the original photographs were supposed to be about Vrabel and that as they were being shopped, it wasn't being pointed out that it was Diana?
I, I've actually heard both things, so it's hard to say.
Yeah, I think there's rumors that both partners individually were the ones that hired these people, but that's not believable. Not, not that they both did it, but I've heard on both sides that they've hired—
It's not believable though. Like, what, what, what spouse would want their family very publicly blown up.
So I don't know whether there's vengeance here or not, and the gossipy portions of this make me really uncomfortable. And I will keep asking you guys how you feel about paid photos to ruin lives, because they were being shopped and nobody was taking them. And what is a lessened journalism standard at the New York Post gets someone gone at the New York Times. Like, that's what happened there. This is— when you talk about hit jobs in the media and canceling people, like, what happened there is paid photos are being shopped around. In my lifetime, the only ones who take that sort stuff in this country are TMZ has the standard on what you pay for news. TMZ will pay for your videos, and it— I, I don't know how long the New York Post and Murdoch have, have been doing that, but shopped photos for sale to harm someone are not something that were purchased by credible news organizations. That's not supposed to be journalism. We started this with I'm gonna get into the NBA.
I, I do want to say though, that's clearly like a barbarians at the gate scenario. New York Post going after New York Times. But I just wanted to circle back on what you said about conflict of interest. Conflict of interest in journalism exists everywhere. It just is a matter of degree, and it's obviously a larger degree here. But we've seen this with insiders, anyone that you know and you like and are friendly with, or even these players who have podcasts. They have an ax to grind as well. Bias exists. I think the fact that people try to put on blinders and say that it doesn't, we have no conflict of interest, it's bullshit.
I understood that objectivity is an illusion, but it's what's being aspired to by the standard of the highest of journalism. Yes, it's a lie. Of course objectivity is a lie, but that's the goal. That's why there's a conduct code at one place and football doesn't have one of these. I will get to the basketball, and I will just preface all the wrong things we're about to say with the Gasbag of the Week. This is— if you'd been— I want you to imagine driving around in your car at 7 years ago. You're driving around and you are listening to the top of sports radio. This is that sports radio 7 years ago.
I saw Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron is 34 years old. He will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now. And we're all going, Wow. LeBron against Milwaukee. He's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing LeBron will never be— as good as Jordan at 40.
Gasbag of the week.
Man, not even close to his worst LeBron take. LeBron, we're good here.
Oh, uh, is that the Ben Simmons take?
Oh yeah. You knew right away when I put up my hand. We're good here.
That Ben Simmons— that, that was the end of LeBron. Ben Simmons has returned to take over the league.
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Da Libetard. While there's nothing official and conversations are still ongoing.
Was that a fake Shefter?
Because it was pretty good.
It was excellent.
I feel like there's legs.
I tried at the beginning and then I lost confidence in it.
It was good. It was good. You got this.
Nothing official. Conversations are still ongoing.
Stugatz.
It is trending towards Nick Sirianni remaining the head coach of the Eagles.
This is the Dan Levatar Show with the Stugatz.
Last night, that's not an interesting series, okay? The only way it gets made interesting is by the personality of the Phoenix Suns. Dillon Brooks is willing to be a villain, and I love that what he thinks is going to shake OKC is just him Draymond Greening it. He was great offensively, I thought. I mean, one turnover handling the ball like that against that defense. He's fearless. Like, I love— I love— well, he's not just a good player, he invites— there is some sound I want to play for you here, and I didn't think— actually, for all the refereeing talk and all the flopping talk and everything else, I thought there was something in the middle of it that everyone's skipping over that was the most interesting part of what he said. So try to ignore that his tie is tied as crookedly as you've ever seen a tie tied, and try to ignore that that jacket doesn't fit quite as well as it should. This is an excellent villain, and he just hammers, uh, SGA.
No, what is it like having to guard somebody like, like that? And then how do you, I guess you could say, have to defend better without fouling?
A little frail. That's what the refs are going to call. You gotta be smarter about it. But you know, this is playoffs, a man's game. So not just man's game, but he said, uh, frauding and flipping and flailing. And he also said one other thing that he said there is I've got to check the film. I black out. I black out. I don't know what happened out there. I believe him the way that he plays. I believe while LeBron can remember everything he did 4 years ago in a game, I believe Dillon Brooks is the opposite. He goes to an emotional state where he blacks out. You believe that?
I black out here.
And to what he was saying, bruh, the Thunder are so talented that seeing them flop and flail, it's just embarrassing. It's hard to watch, man. Like, it's good. They are the champion. We know Shea Gildress-Alexander. He is fire, but he's flailing and trying to get the call.
Well, who do you blame in that? Like, like, does it make— do the Thunder make you mad there or do the referees make referees make me mad?
In the playoffs, there is an understanding that you don't call it like the regular season. And while they still might be able to get away with some of this, not to the same degree. You let them play a little bit more.
The thing with the Thunder too is like, Shay draws these fouls in a bit of a different way from the rest of the team. Like his ability to keep balance low to the floor and draw some of these fouls. Yeah, there's a flop every once in a while, but you see that from any star. But when the rest of the team around him is flailing all over the place, it puts a spotlight on his ability to get to the line and changes his individual reputation as a great player in a way that, that's frustrating to me as someone who actually enjoys watching the artistry of drawing fouls. That's not so different from what Dwyane Wade did down here.
Enjoy the artistry of drawing in a real way? Not—
yes, 2006 forever.
Yeah, in a real way. Not when it's James Harden hooking somebody else's arm. But what Shea does in terms of balance and getting into the lane is legitimately athletically impressive. And so being able to do that is going to be viewed totally differently if the Thunder themselves as a team aren't flailing all over the place, right?
I find the Thunder to be a really tough watch. They're a tough watch because of the style of play, and it's the officials that make me angry in that spot, not the team.
Yeah, but to Jeremy's point, it is kind of more poetic to watch SGA do it. When Lou Dort gets in on the fun, nah, bro, come on, referee.
All right, put it on Poll, please. Do you enjoy the artistry of drawing fouls?
It's a no for me, dog. It's— I think Shay pushing off with that, that offhand with his forearm and extending, that's the disgusting thing that we don't like to watch.
I hate it with Harden. I hate it with Tatum. I hate it with SGA.
Yeah.
So not with Dwyane Wade, though. He was great.
You guys are headed toward hating the finals of, uh, OKC against Boston, because if Boston goes 10 for 50 from 3 and then it's that then it's just free throws on the other side. You guys are going to complain about everything happening there. But let's, let's check in with Devin Booker here because this is very early in the playoffs for this. Okay. Trista and Juju are going to pop up after games when they get more serious here on our YouTube and with Alliub. So I want after games people to check in with what it is they'll be doing here in a couple of games. But this is awfully early. In the playoffs for Devin Booker, 2 games, 2 games in really to this, to be saying this.
I heard Caruso tell him to call the tech and, you know, he ended up doing it. So that's one ref in my 11 years I haven't called a ref out by name. But James was terrible tonight through and through. It's bad for the sport, bad for the integrity of the sport. You know, people are going to start viewing this as a WWE, you know, if they're not held responsible.
That's going to be a monster fine. That can't just be criticizing the official.
Did you see the play that he's talking about? But making it that—
I'm just picturing Playing the PR person right now.
No, but think about it. It was ridiculous. Okay, but by name? All right, so what's the fine? What is the fine going to be for that? Is that just— Max?
Maximum fine? I think maximum fine's like, for someone like that, it's like $50,000, right? Like, did you see the— it was ridiculous, the play, okay? It was ridiculous. He gets shoved out of bounds. He's totally off balance because he gets shoved out of bounds.
They make the call.
They call the blocking foul. And as he's falling out of bounds, he flips the ball behind him because he then clearly wants to use both of his hands to brace the fall on the fans that he's about to make. But when he flips the ball backwards, it like hits Jalen Williams in the waist. Okay, whatever. Caruso then goes up to the referee and says, give him a technical, that's a technical. Dan, it was like 5 seconds later, you could then hear the referee's whistle blow and he calls the technical. That's bullshit.
That guy looks bad, right, bro? Like, first of all, Alex Caruso, you snitching ass joker.
You know what happens to snitches, right? They get hurt.
I know, stitches, you dig? And I think that's what makes it an embarrassing postgame. Like, like you say, he gonna get a maximum fine, but he's actually right in what he's saying. That was a ridiculous call. So we got to hold these refs a little bit more accountable, man.
James was terrible tonight through and through.
That's what I'm saying. Like that. I don't hear that ever. I don't hear that ever where it's just quite that personal. Like you guys are talking around it and I'm like, no, the thing that's right in the middle here is 2 games into the playoffs. You got one of your superstars just making this assessment very personally of one man.
James was terrible tonight through and through.
You have to do that.
Through and through.
You have to do that if you're, if you're Phoenix. So that's your opportunity to get back in this. Is that you make the referees think, and that public pressure, it does work. It's why, it's why people do it. They're humans.
It was so soft too. Like, it's like he chucked the ball at the guy. He flipped it behind him so that he doesn't just fall straight up on a fan. I'm telling you, I like what he did there. I, I think the referees—
wait a minute, just let me be clear. Let me just be clear, because if you would sign up for Adam Silver, just, hey, let's let this fly, let's go, let's let guys talk after games the way they want to, you can't have this every night, Jazz.
James was terrible tonight, through and through. I'll tell you what I want. I want the referees— I know they have numbers on their back, which are really tiny, by the way. I think their names should be on their back, just like the players. I think the referees' names, and not even their last name, their first name. So like when Devin Booker there says James was terrible through and through all night long, I think the back of his jersey should just say James.
First name or last name?
The first name. That's what I just said. No, no, I get that here, but like Thanks for not listening to the show.
He just said that to you.
Look, he can have—
you were so eager to get to your point. Look, go away and come back for Pitch Clock. Pitch Clock is later. You can come back. Yeah, well, if— let's segregate not just baseball, but also Jeremy. Let's just segregate.
It was fun.
I'll head home early.
Pitch Clock later in the show. If you want to hear all Jeremy's thoughts on all Jeremy's things, and he won't listen to anybody there either, you can do so on Pitch Clock. In a little while. He just said that to you and you're just so eager to say what you want to say that you don't listen to anything that he said before that. It'll come up in arbitration.
I think Zazz should be awarded the Best Take of the Year So Far Award because yes, hold these brothers accountable, bro. What the hell was that, Bob, uh, Wischnowski?
Like, no, no, it just says Bob. That's it. Like, in this case, the guy James, like, the crowd's like, James, what are you doing?
Okay, now instead of ref, you suck, it'll be Bob, you suck.
What do you think, Zazz, about about a tabulation like we have on NBA.com by ref in terms of like instead of field goal percentage, stats on refereeing.
Hey, I mean, the more info the better.
Uh, you say that, but I worry about the safety of referees in the age—
what's Bob's war?
Yeah, everybody— yeah, that sounds nice right up until one of these guys, old guys, is walking through an airport and he costs somebody a bunch of money. And you guys are, you guys are making a great game of it. It is a great game right up until somebody gets shivved airport.
I mean, we do know a lot of the names and we're not shimming them. Yeah, well, Scott Foster survived this long.
No, but if we allow the players to say whatever they want, if we turn this into hunting and sport, we're gonna have a lot of fun with the referees in airports trying to get on to the next flight.
Is that really Ben Simmons?
Yeah, he's doing that. He's doing that now.
That's a good fish.
Put it on the poll please as well. Caruso, snitching ass joker. @LeBittardShow.
Through and through.
Yes, it really is. It is exceptional. 2 games in for the star of the team that has no chance to say, yeah, James, don't pay attention to us being terrible. James was terrible. And it's not like partially terrible. James was terrible through and through. That doesn't happen very often. It really doesn't.
Watching James's family, like watching the press go, what?
You're Juju, Trista. You are our basketball experts. I know he got his money's worth on the fine because I just haven't heard a whole lot of guys say individual forevermore, that guy sucks. All my future games, that guy sucks. That guy was terrible tonight. That kind of assessment I don't think goes over well.
Do you remember the Fred VanVleet, Ben Taylor was fucking terrible?
Yeah. Yes.
Through and through.
Through and through.
Also, during that game, they called Devin Booker offensive foul for unnatural shooting motion.
Yeah, I saw that.
Which was ridiculous. And then Chet Holmgren went down.
They reviewed it too.
And did this motion and got the foul. So it's like, yeah, through and through, bro.
You know what's bullshit? When we're on the referee topic in the NHL, if you're caught diving, embellishing something, the dude that hit you and drew the initial penalty, even though it was wrong after they go to review, he still serves a penalty.
Yeah, I like it.
I don't like this.
Why?
It could be both.
You committed a penalty and the other guy embellished.
I don't like it. I don't like it because if the guy embellished, you're admitting that it probably shouldn't have been a penalty because embellishment helped draw the penalty.
You don't—
did you see the Sidney Crosby thing that happened?
Yep.
You think that that was a penalty?
I think guys, guys get hit in the face all the time with a high stick.
It's a gag.
They don't then fly and flop on the ground.
Right, which is why Sidney Crosby was lying about it, which is why later on they went to replay and he ended up serving a penalty too.
But it's still a penalty. It's still a penalty.
No, you know, no, you go back in time. Yeah, you, you, you get to go back in time. And we covered this in the Carolina-Ottawa game too. Like, there was an offside, which means that the goal comes off the board, but the penalty that happened off the offside that should have rendered the entire play useless, the penalty still gets to stay? What?
I really think the NBA should adopt the embellishment rule. And look, it's a judgment call. Of course it's subjective, but that's the referee's job, is to make judgment calls.
Go back in time. I'm sorry, I'm interrupting you only because I've gotten distracted by a topic of the last few days as it regards sci-fi movies, going back in time, whether time travel is the sci-fi genre.
Transition!
He hated our topic. It's not just that I hate it, though, merely. It's also that I wanted to go back in time and play Colin Cowherd again from 7 years ago.
But you like to reference Nate.
I saw Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron is 34 years old. He will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now and we're all going, "Wow!" LeBron against Milwaukee. Milwaukee. He's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing, LeBron will never be as good as Jordan at 40.
In all the years doing this, I don't think I've ever had someone care so little for what I had to say on anything than what just happened right now.
It's the reliving.
Panthers are out, no more hockey. You got it.
Oh no, if you wanted to talk about Connor McDavid, we could do that.
I don't want to talk anymore, period.
It was It's not my fault that you don't understand the rules.
I mean, it's your fault that we collaborated on a segment that was so bad that in the middle of it, Dan just trampled us and played a Colin Cowherd sound that we played like 5 minutes earlier.
Well, he—
that was so dismissive.
Funny, as you're saying that, I'd like to go back if I could to something we talked about 7 years ago.
Did you mention a Wayback Machine?
We played a sound a few minutes ago.
I'm bad at this.
I am shook.
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Dan LeBâtard. There is no question, Dan LeBâtard Show included, anybody else, that this guy is the best player on the planet. Whether he wins the Stanley Cup or the Conn Smythe this year, there is no question about it.
Stugatz.
Overrated. Wait, some people say overrated. What's going on? Dan LeBâtard, how you doing? Living in an altered world or what? Oh my God. Goodness.
This is the Dan Levatar Show with the Stugatz.
But it is weird. McDavid, no points in the series so far.
Can't talk about it. Hockey off the board.
Well, I mean, I have given off the impression that I don't watch hockey.
Yeah. Panthers aren't in it. Why would you watch playoffs?
That joke is smacking in our hockey group chat. Anytime something good happens, it's like, too bad Zazz isn't watching.
Wish you caught it.
Time machine travel is something that you identify identified as being, uh, or time travel as, uh, you didn't have to be a machine. You, you identified it as its own genre. Oh yeah, it is not its own genre. That is the sci-fi genre. It fits under the umbrella of the sci-fi genre. Trista is here to nominate something else. In, uh, is— are you thinking that it's bigger than, uh, the shark genre?
It's definitely bigger than the shark genre.
Uh-huh.
It's the natural disaster genre that does not include man-made fires.
Natural disasters.
Twister.
Wait, aren't all these natural disasters? If you were to ask Adam McKay, man-made.
See, that's way too scientific for me. I'm talking about just like somebody at the park, you know, smoking a doobie, and then it turned into a forest I think they're just action movies, like that's part of action. No, genre, definitely not, because I don't— here's the thing, I know it's a genre because I say I don't watch natural disaster movies. I will not watch them.
You don't watch San Andreas with The Rock?
The— and if The Rock is in it, I'm definitely not watching.
Wow. Dan, did you hear my impromptu genres yesterday list on the postgame show? I know you was listening.
Uh, let's play the cowherd sound again.
I saw Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron 34 years old. He will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now and we're all going, wow, LeBron against Milwaukee. He's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing, LeBron will never be as good as Jordan at 40.
You guys see what's going on in the UFL?
4 quarterback play cards from 7 years ago.
Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron is 34 years old. He will will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now and we're all going, wow, LeBron against Milwaukee. He's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing, LeBron will never be as good as Jordan at 40.
Get me some of the quotes there, please, of Adam Silver defending Portland's cheap owner, because Zaslo has called Adam Silver a nothing. He's called him a nothing. And Adam Silver works for the owners. And Tom Dundon right now, the details that are coming out about how cheap their franchise has been during the playoffs would offend anyone who cares about Portland basketball during a lovely story that the ownership— like, I— you don't see this very often where an ownership change is so cheap immediately that the fan base during a playoff run is sort of reading details about what's he doing to our players. And so Adam Silver said, These are quotes, we do not have the sound. The idea that this guy paid one of the highest prices for a professional sports team in history is being called cheap makes absolutely no sense to me.
Is he serious? Like, you, you read that quote now. Now, he was interviewed, he did a spot on Barstool yesterday, okay? Like, so these are real quotes, but if, if I didn't give you that context and you saw that quote, you would wonder if that's real, right?
Well, I'm now wondering whether every single thing that I read anywhere is real. Like, I can't read anything and verify it anymore. I'm getting left hopelessly behind.
How come Pardon My Take can get Adam Silver and you can't get Adam Silver?
It may be 10 years of making fun of how he looks.
Adam Silver looks like—
Yeah, that might be part of it.
Also what Lebo said to him at that one dinner.
Oh, it's a good story. Do you know this story?
No.
Oh, it's a great story. It's a great story. He's walking into— He's walking into dinner with a very small group of us, and it's loud. It's a loud place. And my brother's sitting next to him. And my brother's wildly inappropriate. My brother doesn't know who he is and doesn't care who he is and doesn't know anything about sports. And so I can't hear what they're talking about, but from across the table, my brother just shouts at him, "What?!" What? A guy can't make a few dick jokes?
Play Colin Coward.
I saw Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron is 34 years old. He will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now and we're all going, wow, LeBron against Milwaukee. He's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing LeBron will never be— as good as Jordan at 40.
4 starting quarterbacks in one week. That's half the UFL. Half the UFL starting quarterbacks have been traded in the last 2 days.
You have me longing for Jeremy. I want to get his observations from yesterday's show, but I don't want them in here. I want them from wherever he is segregated, put apart. Pitch Clock will be later in the next hour and Jeremy will be, I'm assuming, a part of the festivities tonight as we do.
He will not.
Draft coverage. Oh, he's not going to be with us. Okay, great.
Cody will be here though.
Okay. Zigactos, we're going to have— are we going to have a counter? Are we going to have a Super Zigacto counter? It's important that he— to him, it's important that he beat Mel Kiper Jr. at Super Zigactos, correct? That's the most—
exacto. See, I'm still— I'm throwing Super Zigactos away. I don't think my dad knows his own game. It's exactos, and then there's Zigactos. Cactus.
Does your dad maybe— does he have a—
a—
okay, so Kuyper made a late push last year and beat him, right? Was there any kind of streak he had before that to beating Kuyper?
I gotta look back at the exact details of their recent years.
But will there be some years that he beats him?
Yes, I believe last year he— either last year or the year before.
The last year you said Kuyper made a late push.
The year before he beat Kuyper.
Okay.
It's very important, and we're gonna have a counter tonight, and everybody here other than Jeremy is going to be involved. He's mopey, you see. He's walking around and he wanted to be at the microphone to give the observations, but I told him I want them from outside. I want them from outside our purview, whatever observations he has on yesterday's show. And are you guys feeling bad for him?
I feel you kind of bully him.
Kinda.
I think he's like the— no, it's not the whipping post.
It's absolutely—
he needs to get in line though.
In the book, too eager, too thirsty.
He did walk in here and all of us were like, Dan was pretty clear. And then, uh, and then he, he's like, no, I do it in here. That's what he said off mic then. He's like, he with his chest. No, I'm either doing it here, I'm not doing it at all. And then Dan just gave him one arm wave and he's like, skulked away.
Now I feel bad. All right, Jeremy, you can do it in here, but do it in here with that microphone.
This is absurdly technically difficult.
This is stupid.
What do you want?
Play the cowherd sound again.
I saw Michael Jordan play at 40 years old. LeBron is 34 years old. He will never be as good as Michael Jordan was at 40. LeBron James at 40 will not be in an NBA game 6 years from now and we're all going, wow, LeBron against Milwaukee, he's easily the best player on the floor. But I'll tell you one thing, LeBron will never be as good as Jordan at 40.
What criticisms do you have of yesterday's show?
Like Greg Cody, I also have an Uncle Bud.
Okay, these are just observations.
I can't believe you guys talked Kyle Stowers without me. You know, when Chris, uh, said that Mockingbird reminds him of, uh, Working the Room. Yeah, you know, when Chris said the Mockingbird reminds him of Dumb and Dumber, for me I think of, uh, the classic cover by James Taylor and Carly Simon.
You know, she saved his life.
You know, two different white Americans.
James Taylor, right? Did you know this about James Taylor? Crazy into drugs.
James Taylor.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The music does not reflect—
career started with, uh, the Beatles over at Abbey Road. Pretty special stuff. Three different people in here said in the year of our Lord 2026, and I just thought that was kind of cool.
Our camera operator hates you right now.
You know, the changing of the name to the Cleveland Guardians doesn't really do much if every single time people talk about the team in the past, they say the then Cleveland, you know. Learned a little bit about that Tony FIU story. Not going to talk about it here, but interesting stuff. You know, I really liked that Ronan Farrow refers to them as attorneys general, uh, similar to RBI. It's pretty cool.
We talked about that back here. I was confused by that.
Smart guy. Zaslo, why'd you take out baseball as a movie genre? What the hell, man?
Why do you sound so breathy?
I'm walking, I'm doing the room.
You know?
Dan, I don't really know how people would check and find where the money is that's going toward AI with their political candidate because they're just going to use AI to try to find it. Isn't that confounding?
You are breathy.
And finally, what the hell is up with Dr. Fred Johnson? Am I right?
Oh yeah.
Thank you.
I'll be back next week. Good set. Good set.
Don't threaten us. He's going to be back in a few segments because Pitch Clock is a roaring success.
I thought you meant Dr. Johnson.
Yeah, I was going to be like, wow. That's a Tosh Webb redemption real soon.
The numby spoke and we brought him back.
It would be funny. You can't dispute it would be funny.
Yeah. You'd get an answer to what is your lowest professional moment right away. South Beach Sessions.
It's been years since we had anyone on to talk about the draft. Like years since we've had a guest. Even more years since we had a guest that we're introducing to our audience. Hey, this is a draft guy. He knows his stuff.
GM Whisperer.
That's what we did yesterday.
Roaring success.
Tonight's draft party promises more live danger. It's going to be— everything that we're doing is going to be live. As you've seen recently, I make more mistakes than I ever have. And so that's dangerous. So we get dangerous the accidental way. At any point, I can embarrass myself. Let's mix in tequila. That usually helps. Or more than one. We'll see where tonight ends up. We will walk the line on possibly getting fired tonight. How long are we doing this? Are we doing this until the Dolphins pick? Are we doing the whole first round? What are we doing?
This is—
this is extravagant.
This has been something that we've talked about in some of these meetings and as we prepare for this, and yet we don't have an answer to it. It's kind of— we'll feel it out.
I think that we've landed on somewhere we're going to watch the Dolphins first pick. Pick and we're not gonna finish the first round. So somewhere in there we're gonna stop.
So maybe after the Dolphins' second pick.
That's the 30th pick. That's—
yeah, see, that's all night. That's all night.
And there's a danger of them trading out of the first round. It's like, what are we doing?
They only have 8 minutes now to make these.
Let me get— maybe I'll make a prediction. I think we get to the mid-20s.
Um, 8 minutes is a good pivot. Was there anything more annoying than you have several months to make this pick, here are another 15 minutes?
Most energy drinks taste like a dare that you lost.
Tossed.
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I want an island vacation.
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Sports fans, all the sports are coming together. It's a great time to just sit on your couch, text your friend, hey, come over, let's watch the games. And when I do that to my friends, guess what they text me back? I got the Miller Lite. That's right, they pick up Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer and they come over to my place. We take that first sip and we realize Oh man, we just made a regular old-fashioned night into a special night. Thank you, Miller Lite. And shortly thereafter, we got multiple screens on, everybody's dialed into something different, and the whole night just keeps building and building and building. That's why I reach for Miller Lite. It can take an ordinary night and take it to an extraordinary place. It's clean, refreshing, easy to drink, brewed for taste with simple ingredients, just 96 calories and 3.2 carbs.
Carbs.
The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different. Cheers to legendary moments with Miller Lite. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlite.com/dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.
"James was terrible tonight, through and through."
Dan says we'll get to the NBA now, but we need approximately 8 more minutes on something else first. We have never seen a player directly go after a referee the way Devin Booker did last night, but who should we blame more for the Thunder's flopping: the refs or the Thunder themselves? Plus, Jeremy gets kicked out of the room but returns to deliver a tight five on yesterday's show. Breathy, though.
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