Transcript of Alley Oop: MPJ’s Comments Go Viral — NBA Media Day Fallout & the Liberty’s SHOCKING decision to dump head coach

Welcome to the Alley. We outside, though. You see my sister is Trista right now in Zion in the matrix right now, calling from where Nio is actually at. Thank you all for pulling up on this, you feel me? What another... Look, it's a lot going on. We don't need no damn intros. We're going to cut the intro short. It's time for Bus Stop.

Hold up. I know we were about to start with the liberty. Yeah. But you said Zion. And I feel that we got to talk about Zion.

You know what I mean? And I'm not talking about- My boy got the goddamn... My boy got the goatee.

I think, so Zion went... It was Media Availability Week or whatever. Media Week. What is it called?

It's called Media Day.

And so they throw out their little people. They throw out the little characters that they have in their puppeteer match. And Zion was like, I feel like I'm in the best shape of my life.

Right. Nobody say it feels good to feel good, man.

He said it feels good to feel good. Like he's never felt good or taken care of his body In his life. And someone put him on the Zempic, and he was like, Yo. Allegedly. Allegedly. I'm just saying potentially. And he was like, What's it like to not think about food 24/7? I'm now in the best shape of my life where I can work out for hours and not need 17,000 beignets. I feel amazing. My knees are feeling good, right?

I'm about to say, bro, he was out for Achilles injuries for the last six years of his career. That's not the case, bro. You have not been out for health concerns. But keep going, sis.

And you've been out because you've been fat. But Jeff Teague said it on his podcast, and it's nice to see a professional athlete say what we have been feeling, which is, listen, you're in control of all this. It's like you, Zion. And Jeff Teague is like, I'm not a fan of his anymore. He could have been feeling good. Yes, find it, Ms. Rebecca. Find it. Jeff Teague, Zion, you will pull it up really fast.

Shit. Okay.

From boxing to working out on the football field a lot to just different random workouts. Locked in, pickleball. In that time frame last year, I really felt a shift in my body to where I would look at him and go, Dude, it feels good. It feels good. I I haven't dealt like this since college, high school. It feels good.

It feels good, T. Cut the beat.

It's probably the dumbest press conference I ever heard in my life. All this stuff is because of you. You choose to eat, be out of shape, all that. Now, all of a sudden, it's a contract year, probably. Or he's looking for an extension. He caused a lot of harm on his body by being out of shape.

Now, he caused a lot of harm on his own body. He shot it. You can't say that. He had like, he hurt himself intentionally because of some French vibe. Look, I salute Jeff T, bro. I didn't hear that before now. So, yeah, salute. He right. Why is you acting like somebody held you in a dungeon for three years and they wouldn't let you out, and now they finally let you out and you feel good?

He literally acted like he got Brittany Grinert. You know what I mean? Like he was in a Russian prison getting the metal plate of gulag underneath the door, and he was malnourished. She's like, Oh, I finally feel good. It's like, no, you were eating yourself into a stupor.

I ain't never heard no woman come out and be like, Bro, I miss Rosiah. That's my guy.

What was her name?

We can't bleep her name out.

Bleep her name out. We can't give her any shine. Anyway, she came out and was like, Yo, he's fat. I go over there. The house doesn't even have furniture. They got lawn chairs in the living room. Is this a professional athlete making 40 M's or is this a guy in his dorm room?

I think lawn chairs in the living room get a bad rap, though. What? For real? I ain't going to hold you. Come on, man.

Why not? What? We cannot have lawn chairs in the living room?

Why? I,. We got a couch and we We got a love cushion or whatever they call it. Love sofa, whatever they say. Love's chair. And we got a damn lawn chair because it's my brother. I like laying in my lawn chair, man. The dog can hop up on you.

Oh, my. No, we got to move on. Boys, stop.

I would like to ask, do you really think that Luca lost all this weight playing pickleball?

No.

No.

He did not. I'll just say this about Luca. It's It's not pickleball, homie. It's not pickleball at all.

It's O'Zickleball.

It's O'Zickelball. It's Monjiquelball. It's Woogickleball. That's Woogovio Zambeck and Monjaro, if you were wondering. I know all the GLP ones. Not that I use them, but just because.

If you're dealing with moderate to severe plexoriasis, neither here nor there. Moving on.

All right, let's move on.

Speaking of out-of-pockets, out-of-pocket books, Michael Porter Jr, Brother of Jontay. What a summer my boy is having behind the microphone. Since, have you caught up to any of this? Have you been watching this?

The one that I just saw that I wanted to make a video on, I hope that Mr. Becker has. It was about how he was dating a girl and agreed to split rent with her. When she, first of all, she makes whatever she makes, not a lot. She was not able to afford $5,000 a month in rent, which is like not many people can. And so he said, Well, what could you afford? And she said, I can afford this. He's like, I'll pay the rest. And then why are we getting Yahoo? Why are we not getting the video?

Salute, Ms. Rebecca. Everybody in the video audience and the listening audience, thank you for being here. Point your hands at your phone or at your TV device and send a prayer for our sister, Ms. Rebecca. Just send a general prayer. It don't got to be specific. Just send one her way.

What is wrong with the two of you? Look, I have three words. Okay, I get Michael Porter Jr. That's what I get. I have to Google that.

Dylan, leave all of this in.

Let me see here because I feel like- Look, we're watching Black couples right now.

I don't know what... No matter what you say, Ms. Rebecca, we're watching a Black couple get interviewed on our television. Maybe she's having... I don't know. Blacks are rising. I didn't want to say that out of pocket. Maybe she's having some ED I don't know. It looks like a commercial for that. She's having an ED? We're talking about MPJ.

I just feel like you don't know how to find things.

That's all.

I know you're not worth $200 million and And you were splitting rent with your ex-girlfriend.

Are you talking about that I should pay for the whole thing?

Absolutely. Hold on. $200 million deal and you were splitting rent with your ex-girlfriend?

Yeah.

What are you talking about?

The right decision Basically, bro, I said, whatever happens in this relationship for the next year, I'm committed to paying this rent.

You're a year-by-year guy. You're committed to the NBA year-by-year. You're committed to your living year, man.

Because I'm like, I don't know if this is my wife. I don't know if it's not. So I'm like, Okay, for this next year, I got you. Whatever happens, we could break up. I got you for this next year. I'll split rent with you.

You're going into it with the wrong mindset, though.

I know, but, bro, I don't know. I just didn't know. So then we ended up breaking up five, six months into the rent. And basically, that's where I'm at now, where I'm like, Man, do I keep helping her out, or is it cooked?

So you just don't send her her half for the rest of the year?

Because she need to act right month to month.

Oh, Okay, that's where you lost me. You need to act. You're not together anymore. Go ahead, Juju. I'm going to let you go.

Go ahead, Juju. No, go ahead, Tristan.

I've been thinking about topics that are like the hottest stove. I'll be like, I'll let you go, Juju.

I'll let you go. I'll follow you. I'm going to catch the alley-oop.

Juju said, No, no, no. You step on those hot calls for me, for us. When you lost me at, you're going to need to act right month to month. You're not together anymore. What do you mean act right month to month?

Yeah, what is acting right? I guess. Yeah.

What does that mean?

What does that mean? Can she not have gentleman callers?

Yeah. Can she not date anyone else? You've promised to pay the rest of the lease. Send her the bread and call it a day?

Or maybe she got some embarrassing pictures on her phone on my boy.

That's probably why he's like, I'm not going to make you act right.

Don't take... You posted a picture I took that one time.

I don't like the fact that she's got to come to him month to month, hat in hand, to be like, Hey, could you Venmo me that money, though? Because it's the end of the month. I got to see the apartment.

Because dad will tell me, Hey, sometimes you need to keep your hat in your hand for some of these apartments. Now, Some places, I get it. Yeah, man, I may be pull up on you every month for this. Come on, man. I live in a damn... I'm in the Marcy Projects bit, bruh. Come on, bruh. I'm not finna go back and forth with you. You know the picture you got on your phone. You won't delete it. How about this? I'm going to send you to rent. Holla at me next month when that picture still ain't relevant. Because maybe we waiting on some stuff that he shouldn't be seen in. My boy ain't never been this smart, so I don't know why I'm giving him this much credit.

You really are. I feel like we had not seen or heard anything from Michael Porter Jr. When he was in Denver after he said, I don't think COVID is real. I think it's a plant from the government to make us sick, and it's a conspiracy. I think Denver was like, Okay, we're going to need to put you in the with some duck tape on until the game, until game day rolls around. And he got to Brooklyn, he started talking a lot.

Yeah, he goofy for that one. Come on, joker of the day for that one, bro. That was like a month ago or so. That's still a goof of his head. I ain't putting my damn girl through no Yes. You got to jump through some hoops to get to know me. Bro, it's me we're talking about. I'm a prize. Yes, I love myself, but I ain't this much of a prize. This lady got a parent, mom, dad, sister, brother. I'm playing Andrew Tate in front of her. What if you're going to get the hell up out of here with that one? Salute, though.

There's nobody more respectful towards women that I know than Juju.

See, now, this is what you got to understand. I've been a player since I was in third grade. Like, Oh, congratulations. You are a great-looking woman. Guess what? I've been doing that since I was six, man. I've been seeing fine women since I was six. Had them, you feel me, on my team consensually as well through high school, middle school, college. Come on, man. I'm a grown-ass man right now.

I got you through the consensually.

I'm a grown-ass man right now. I don't get impressed. You can't even impress me with fine no more. Guess what? There's a hundred million folks on the earth fine. What you got between the ears?

Yo, I thought I was impressing you with fine when we met with my bling. I thought that's what it was.

You was impressing me with sauce, man. Flavor.

Sauce is the sauce. Come on.

I was like, now, something's going on over here. The vibe is pulling me this way. Who are you and what do you do? Why do you have on 17 chains like Slip Rick himself? In the damn Super Bowl meeting.

He said, I had a whole bunch of them on my team consensually since I was what? Six years old?

Six years old. Yeah, I said six, man. Come on. I've been a player since I was six, man. Congratulations for looking good, man. But I don't see you. I see you I want to see, and that's my baby. Speaking of hoops, Brandon Turner the other night put a fever. She was at the free throw line, bro, and she had one of the most epic mistakes you could have. It wasn't the ultimate epic, which is the airball, but she shot the ball so hard into the glass. She almost broke the damn goal. The whole Asus bench, when it happened, reacted and was jumping like, Oh, somebody's shooting. Did you see that?

I did not see it. If Miss Rebecca has it, which I know she doesn't.

You see, I was trying to feel. I was doing my job. I was like, Look, Brianna Turner, ladies and gentlemen. Yeah. Let's just start there, Miss Rebecca.

We're just giving her time to get into it. And it's like, no, it's not coming. It's not coming. No, the B-roll is definitely still not coming. Don't worry.

Even now, she didn't take that time either to find a video. I have it. It's just getting it to you. Just give mama a second. Put the blade down. Put the blade down, Ms. Rebecca. Bro, look at the Aces, bitch, bro. They so damn stupid. They so damn stupid, bro.

That was a jump scare. Look at them jump scare.

Keia Stokes wanted to laugh instantly. She had to look back to make sure she could laugh. Keia Stokes, hell. You know who else? Hell. Who was that? Alia Boston? I can't see. That's the old girl. She just got signed. Slupt the game caught. She's a cop. She tried to give her a little down, good shot. That wasn't no damn good shot. Jackie, you need to be extremely yourself laughing that hard.

As you had to tap Jackie like, Yo, relax, relax, stop. That's how you knew that it was really a blowout. Because if the aces were down in that game, I don't know what the score was at that point, but I bet you they're up 20 or more. Because if they're down, they're not playing around like that.

Bro, A video like this make me miss playing team sports, bro. This is funny as hell, bro. This is a playoff game. She shot this ball so damn hard in the backboard, bro. Look, Brianna Turner We ain't going to play like this. This is the first time we mention you on the show. We got to keep respect on your name. You are a lez. I know.

I like that. The best part about Rebecca is that she likes to beat a dead horse, metaphorically only, and she'll just keep it on loop. We're just going to have this on loop. It's like, damn. By the time I find it, I have such happiness that I found it that I just need to leave it there forever. We just know Brianna Turner is not there for her shooting. She's there for her defense and her rebounding.

Toughness. Look, we're playing that video out of spite. In other news, the Jonas Brothers won't be playing at the Phoenix Arena on Sunday as scheduled because of the Phoenix Mercury. Come on, man. How are we feeling about that, sis? The WNBA is saying, No, bro. Chill. We got this. What you think, though?

I think it should have happened for the Golden State Valkeries if it's going to happen for Phoenix. I'm happy that it happened in Phoenix, but you can't have on one hand talking out one side of your mouth and then be talking out the other side of your mouth. And Balhalla would have been going crazy at Chase Center. So I think this is a really good sign, though, that the WMBA is going to say, Hey, if we have a playoff game, I don't care who's in the building. I don't care if it's Rihanna. I don't care if it's the Jonas Brothers. I don't care if it's Dua Lippa.

Let's not go too far. Rihanna coming in bitch.

No, I know. I love Rihanna. I love Dua Lipa, and I love the Jonas Brothers. But this is a basketball arena. And if there's basketball to be played, That that's what's going to happen. And you can move your concert somewhere else.

Excuse me. But yeah, it's right, because in 2021, the same stuff happened. The WMBA team was getting booted from this arena, which was the Phoenix Mercury for Disney on Ice.

Oh, yeah. See, wait. Come on. Come on. There's levels to this. I don't know if Disney on Ice still boots the Mercury, but I know that the Jonas Brothers are pretty great. It's not like we just had the Schmonger, but Jonas Brothers, and we're getting rid of them.

Yeah. Salute to the Jonas Brothers, man. Salute to nick Jonas. Getting the job done. That's the only one I know.

You know who's seeing what they want to see is is the GM of the New York Liberty. We got about five minutes at max to talk about the donkey of the day, Jonathan Kolb, the GM of the Liberty, firing Sandy Brondello, a two-time champion, because this is not a results-based business.

Come on, bro. What the hell was that? My boy Miles Elrich, he said that the GM says a coaching change was very much under consideration last This is the end of the season. We won the championship, but it's not about the end result. Bro, what the hell is you talking about, man? They let you GM a team with that? It's not about the result. What is it about, sir? What agenda are you trying to fit Ms. Sandy in then, sir? Because what the hell? She's a winner. She had to deal with injuries all year and new players coming from overseas. Euro basket here. Like, bro, this shit ain't easy. New player, Tasha Cloud getting integrated.

You going to hold your- We own a fee bitch with the broken ribs.

Come on, man. Look, Brianna Stewart needs to be down. Sabrina missed the last scratch of games because she was hurt. John Quill missed a section of the year because she was hurt. Come on, bro. We ain't seen Banaja Lani all year. Fuck, we done forgot. We ain't seen Banaja all year. Banaja was damn near sixth man of the year last year. Come on, bro. We're going to hold our behinds on Sandy? No, bro. We can't play Sandy like that.

You can't play her like that. And Jonathan Kolb, you look into his pedigree and his background and you say, How did you get here? You're an Arizona State alum, criminal justice major. Two of the dumbest things together in all of academia.

Jonathan Kolb, you, sir, are the lame of the week. And he talked about he felt that evolution and innovation was what was needed. Man, how about you ever lose your ass the hell up out of our face, man? Stop talking. Just do your moves, man, because You sound goofy trying to explain it. Just do your damn move. Sit over there. You fired Sandy. That was messed up. But keep on moving. Don't try to talk to us. Don't talk my head out by some damn evolution. Revolution, your liberty was one of the top teams in WMA all year, evolution-wise.

Evolution-wise, they were 9-0. Evolution-wise, innovation-wise, they were innovating ways to put these buckets on your dope piece. And you look at the New York Liberty who's going to be able to come in and be able to still have success with your fingers all up in the God-sitting pot, you're going to turn into the Dallas Wings. You're going to turn into the Chicago Sky, a team that's in the lottery doing nothing, and we're going to be pointing the finger at you.

Exactly. I can't say much more than that, though. You put the bow on it. But yeah, bro, go for the week, my boy. Get them out of here, Jonathan Cole. If you're his friend, if you're his loved one, you understand what we mean. We don't wish no ill will on the brother, but it's some bull-ish, man. It's some bull crap. I'm trying not to cut, but it's some bull, man. You got to make sense more of this stuff. Yeah, bro. Salute to the Aces. I think they're going to do it, bro. They're going to We're going to beat the fever. That Championship match up with the Lynx, I think. Mercury, I see you, but I just think that the Mercury are food's goal. Who you got winning the Championship, though?

Well, I, Juju, accidentally took Asia Wilson, Finals MVP, and I took a lot of Finals MVP. And so I'm rooting for my girl A1 from day one, Bam out of bios, plus one. And I'm going, Oh, you like that. Ace is in seven.

Oh, man. Look, I got links. I got links in about five. We might need to put a little friendly wager down.

I like that.

By the next time we come to this podcast, I'm going to have a little bet for you because I'm riding with my dog, Courtney Williams, no matter what. If the dream out, I'm riding with Courtney. But the dream in, you already know what's going on.

Listen, if I didn't have the bet, maybe that wouldn't be my perspective. But I got to ride with the money. Maybe we can get a DraftKings. Maybe we can get a DraftKings parlay going.

I like that. Draftkings, you listening?

Shout out to DraftKings. It's the segment of the day.

Right. We know the DraftKings executives, they probably playing this in their home studio right now.

Oh, yeah. That's the confidence I like, Juju. That's the confidence that we had on today's show. There was way more that you could have heard if we were live. But next time, why don't you catch us on the DLS Hoops channel. Same bat time. And also on the Levitard Show channel here on Friday.

You dig it.