Transcript of The Funniest Comedy Of The Last Decade | Hour 3 New

Meditieren, Yoga, Joggen—

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Wow, und das ist einfach?

Klar, die macht fast alles automatisch.

Plötzlich fühle ich mich so entspannt. Hol dir dein Geld zurück, tiefenentspannt mit WISO Steuer. You are listening to the Dan Levitan Show in partnership with the DraftKings Sports App, now live in all 50 states.

Want to tell you again, if you wish to be helpful, the fund that David Sampson has started in the name of his late daughter, Kyra, the Kyra Fund. It's K-Y-R-A. If it's something that you want to look up, we're going to give you the information. Information here on the screen and in the descriptions, uh, you will have links, uh, if you want to help. Uh, again, this is not to help David Sampson. This is to help people, uh, who are afflicted with this rarest of, uh, brain cancer. Uh, if it's something that you wish to, uh, donate to, uh, David Sampson has had his life turned around with a cruelty that you would not wish on any parent. And I'm assuming that, uh, If you're at a funeral, for example, you start thinking about the people that you love and the people that would hurt the most if you lost them. Uh, in this particular case, if you can imagine a parent losing a child at 28 years old, a vibrant child, a, a child with a, a great personality who has her life extinguished way too soon, if this is something that you wish to help with, he is helping the families who need help because this will turn your life upside down to have to care for something like this at a ridiculously unexpected age.

Yeah, David has actually talked about this, saying that, you know, he has privilege. He has a privilege of money to spend to seek the best treatment possible. He has a privilege of connections. He had people he could call and who, who do I need to get in contact with and where do we need to go? But a lot of families that are dealing with this do not have those connections, do not have those resources at their beck and call. So donating to the, the Kira Fund is a great way to help those families kind of navigate that stuff.

Yeah, and just to kind of reiterate what you just said, not to make this discussion about healthcare in this country, but I mean, I can't even imagine what he was describing, the trouble that he was having over the last 9 months for someone who can totally afford whatever her medical costs were, and to, you know, have to haggle with insurance companies. How can— how can what you're going through not be covered by insurance? You have brain cancer, you know.

Well, we've talked We talked some about this, right? I was stunned at the number of people in America who were just fine with a CEO being assassinated in the streets because people are so upset about what the health industry, healthcare industry does. It is wildly unfair and it is cruel to be at your most vulnerable state and then have to start arguing or haggling over costs when you've been paying and not needing it, like insurance is, you know, insurance is something you want to pay for your entire life and never have to need. But then when you're in a position of need and now you have to argue with the insurance company when you're already broken, scared, and at your most vulnerable, I do understand the sentiment that is rage-filled because the insurance industry is so often an incredible poisonous scam that I get how it is that people arrive there. But think of the absurdities as of where you're arriving. You're good with cold-blooded murder in the streets, right, of somebody because you're so frustrated with what he represents as a symbol. Uh, I've had trouble the last couple of days, uh, and I'm not going to get any better at it, segueing from the serious subject matter and the tragic subject matter, because we're— most of us are spending our Sunday out there with David Sampson around an enormous amount of grief.

But I'm going to segue back into the nonsense of the day that we tackle around here. And I don't think I'm ever gonna get any better at doing the transitions on that. But if you want to help, the name is Kyra, K-Y-R-A, and her fund is someplace where you can help. Vinny Goodwill on GetUp says of Jaylen Brown, quote, If they're tired of Jaylen Brown, that's their business. But leaving him out there like this when he's put so much equity into this team, into this franchise, is disrespectful and embarrassing. So now Benny Goodwill is arguing that not only does Jaylen Brown have a right to be hurt, Jaylen Brown also has a right to the Boston Celtics doing this quickly so that they're not disrespecting disrespecting and embarrassing him?

Well, I mean, quickly, free agency starts today. The draft was a week ago. How, how quick is quickly? It literally hasn't started yet.

Is this disrespectful and embarrassing, yes or no?

I'm going no. He is not the first player in the history of the NBA who's really good and might get traded or has been traded or has been talked about getting traded. And I'll go back to That's what the money's for.

Mm-hmm.

That's what the money's for.

He says at no point has he been, "Don't trade me." In fact, quite the opposite. He did the superstar thing where, "I just had the most fun I had," and we all very easily deduced what he was saying.

Maybe the franchise that doesn't hang division championship banners, that doesn't hang Eastern Conference championship banners, that only hangs championship banners didn't appreciate his favorite year being when they lost in the first round.

Maybe, maybe.

I mean, what is Jaylen Brown's value? Because if he's your best player, you're not good enough. And I don't mean that as an affront to Jaylen Brown.

I think, I think, yeah, he could make an argument. What do you mean we're not good enough? I won Finals MVP. I was the best player on the team that won the championship.

He won Finals MVP the way Andre Iguodala won Finals MVP. No, no, no, no.

Andre Iguodala won because of a very specific circumstance. Yeah, there it is.

Yep.

No one thinks he's their best player. No one.

That's a problem on a lot of people.

No one thinks Jaylen Brown is Boston's best player.

Tatum thinks he is.

He was their best player this season through the regular season. He was their best player in those playoffs in 2024. If you look at the totality of those playoffs, he outplayed Jayson Tatum.

They wouldn't be trading him if they thought he was their best player.

I think there's a— Gotcha.

Well, the other player hasn't said he wants out. In so many words.

And also, also, one could argue that the best trade value is the guy who's healthy and productive, not the guy come back.

Well, what's his value? Tell me what his value is, because it wasn't enough to land Antetokounmpo. What's his value?

Yeah, I think that's, that's a different story, right? Because, and I told you guys this, Milwaukee was not looking to be status quo.

I mean, if I may, wouldn't it be enough to acquire Giannis if Milwaukee wanted Jaylen Brown?

Right.

And the reason why they don't want him is not because of his skill level. It's because they're just doing something different with their franchise. They're like, this guy is too good. He stands in the way of our ultimate goal of a full rebuild.

Right. They prioritize picks and young players in order to help them kind of rebuild this thing. And Jaylen Brown, while a great player, is only 2 years younger than Giannis. I don't think people realize that. We think of Jaylen Brown as super young and Giannis as old man. It's only a 2-year difference between the two of them. And so Milwaukee, very rightfully so, looked at it and said, look, We were barely .500 with Giannis. If we just swap out Giannis for Jaylen Brown, that doesn't help us. Like, at best, we're around where we are right now, and that's not going to help us. It's not that he wasn't enough for Giannis as a return on value. It's that they weren't looking for another in-his-prime player. They were looking for the opportunity.

I think people are going to be surprised by how little they get in return for Jaylen Brown. I think that it's not going to be what, uh, what a superstar would normally get at 29 years old. Do you think I have that wrong?

I think you have that wrong. What—

so what do you think they're going to get then?

What—

who's going to— where's the team that's doing it and saying, you know what, Jaylen Brown is our last piece? Or what's the team that's out there saying, Jaylen Brown is good enough to be our best player, we'll take our championship chances with Jaylen Brown being our best player?

So there are two teams right now that are in talks. Portland is one and the Clippers are the other, and they're both fit the profile. Portland is a team like, we've got some young pieces here, we made the playoffs last year, now we're looking to take a leap. Can we take some of these young pieces, amalgamate them, and go out and get our star player in Jaylen Brown? The Clippers, different story, right? They're trying to extricate themselves from the Kawhi Leonard era. They've, uh, already, as Jeremy informed us earlier, they've let him know that they're not going to extend him. He's going to go to Toronto to get Brandon Ingram, and then maybe you get Jaylen Brown in there as well. And now the Clippers have rebuilt themselves once again. You're, you're painting a picture that kind of is reminiscent of what the Grizzlies went through with Ja Morant. That's not the case. There is a market for this guy. There is an appetite for this guy. But obviously the things that complicate the situation for Boston is Boston is not in Milwaukee's place where it's like, oh, just give us young players and picks.

Boston's like, oh no, we're trying to win right now. And so moving him cannot be a long-term play for them. It has to be something that delivers something in the near term.

But who's the player that they're going to get? When you say if they go to Portland, Or they go to Clippers and you're telling me, no, I expect them to get the haul.

What's the haul?

What's the haul that you think Jaylen Brown's going to bring back if Portland and the Clippers are the ones involved and they don't have all that much to give?

By the way, Atlanta is another team that I forgot to mention is also involved or interested. Toumani Camara and Shaden Sharp and like guys like that. I mean, they have players. Scoot Henderson, I have to believe. Would be available. You went out and got Ja. I can't believe that you hold on to him and keep Scoot, another non-shooting point guard, on your roster. So they've got things that they can offer, they've got assets they can offer. But again, I think the definition of haul gets complicated because Boston is not a team that's saying, well, back to the drawing board. They're saying, hey, we're trying to reload for another run in the championship.

I don't think the Clippers in Portland have the things that make them better than what Jaylen Brown makes them. Do you?

It might be a bigger deal. It might be something that involves a third team, a fourth team. All I'm saying is, the picture that you're painting— I'm not here to tell you, hey, they're gonna— he's gonna get traded for this or that. I don't like doing the hypothetical trade game. I like dealing in reality. The reality is he is going to fetch something nice for them. The question is, where is it gonna come from? Is it gonna be a multi-team deal? But he has value.

I'm not saying he doesn't have value. I think people are gonna be surprised at how little comes in return for a Finals MVP who is ostensibly still in his prime.

What does little mean for you?

I mean a name that makes you think Boston is now a contender and better than they were with Jaylen Brown. A name that makes Boston look like they're better than they already are. I don't think they're going to get something better in return, like something that gets Boston excited about. Yeah, I think we're a good deal better, or better at all, than we just were having this person on our team. I don't think that the name that comes back, especially because One of the things that's happening here right now is you think that as they get to survey the entirety of the market, they're creating more and more options. I think he's been available long enough now to show you that they're not getting back something that excites them.

He was available long enough. Most of that long enough was to get Giannis Antetokounmpo. That happened a week ago.

They were, they were famously not reaching out to third parties because Boston didn't want to be put in the position now where I imagine you're landing on on this hypothesis, Dan, because Boston doesn't have a lot of leverage here. They've kind of—

correct—

this situation, and teams may know that, and that's probably why you think the offer won't reflect that. But the only superstar that we know to be available right now that is in the class of Jaylen Brown is Kawhi Leonard, and that is obviously complicated. Maybe they don't get something that can plug the hole of Jaylen Brown and impress you with a name that's like, all right, Boston's here, That's a great player to pair with Jayson Tatum, but they can get something in return that when the next disgruntled superstar arrives— and it's only a matter of months because someone will be available at the deadline— they have something in their arsenal that can help them acquire them.

Isn't it less about being surprised what they're going to get for Jaylen Brown, what he's worth, and more about everyone out there knows the Celtics are up against it now so they can lowball the Celtics because they have to get rid of Jaylen Brown?

I think we are making a massive leap also in assuming that he's on the block and on the move, that's not necessarily—

You think it's possible that he's back there?

Yeah.

Oh, I think no chance.

Yes, I do. We went through this with Kevin Durant in Brooklyn. Like, he got traded eventually, but he didn't get traded immediately. He came back and it was, oh, there's no way he could come back. He came back and he played and he played well, and then he got traded and they got a pretty good haul for him from Phoenix.

For 22 years on this show, we've debated the greatest athletes of all time. Who's the GOAT in football? Who's the GOAT in soccer? Who's the GOAT in hoops? One thing that we all know is Dan's the GOAT of finding the worst possible take. But there's another kind of MVP/GOAT that doesn't get enough credit. The friend who knows to show up with enough Miller Lights. Plus extra ice. Because they just know. The one who already has seats at the bar when you walk up. That is a Miller Time MVP. I've been on this show long enough to know that Dan is going to make everything about his feelings and Jeremy is going to push back back on whatever I just said. But here's something nobody on this show will argue with: Miller Lite is the summer beer. The original light beer since 1975. This summer, recognize your MVPs. We all have that one friend who makes every game better. Now it's time to give them their moment. Head over to Miller Lite's social media pages to learn more about being a Miller Time MVP. You can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

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Dan Levitar!

I don't think strange for me, but like Mike Ryan.

Oh boy, this is the Dan Levitar Show.

Was the Weird Al Yankovic movie Barbie funny? It was very funny, but I don't think a lot of people saw it. It was very funny and very well done. Harry Potter does a great weird out.

Why would you have seen it?

Because I'm a movie guy, Zazz! I'm not a fraud like you!

I'm fairly startled that I gave you 10 years of comedies to choose from.

It's bad.

And that's what you came up with.

I came up with Barbie and you didn't like that one.

Popstar: Never Stop Stopping? I like that. That movie was good.

That was exactly— that was in 2016, so we are—

It was a long time ago, but that's a good movie.

Uh-oh.

Breaking news. The Miami Heat have made a transaction. They will be bringing back Simone Fontecchio.

Wow.

How much shooting reinforcements, Dan?

What did you make of the contract that Andrew Wiggins got here? I mean, they re-signed Andrew Wiggins for 3 years, which doesn't necessarily mean that he'll be here for 3 years because it's, it's backloaded in a way that's going to make that contract something that people will want to trade for in the next couple of years.

So Andrew Wiggins Wiggins had a player option for $30.1 million, right? And we got the story yesterday, oh, we signed an extension, the total value is $64 million. So everyone leapt to the idea of, oh, Andrew Wiggins opted out, took a pay cut, dropped them down $10 million, gives them more breathing room to spend under this hard cap of $209 mil. Well, that's not what happened. What happened was he opted in, he's getting all $30.1 million, but then the next 2 years after that 17 and 17 with a player option on the last one. So I feel like this is a very silent signal as to the Heat are showing us what their plan is. And their plan is, look, $209 million hard cap. There's no way to get creative around it. It's $209 million. There's only so much good of a roster that we can build with that constraint. So this is a multi-year process.

Why are you saying it like that?

Because I'm trying to appeal to you. So by virtue of structuring the deal this way, it's an acceptance that, hey, we're not going to get a perfect championship team this year. We'll get something competitive. We'll start building some stuff. But next year, next year, now his salary drops almost half from $30 to $17. We're going to have so much more flexibility to really build this thing out and go be aggressive in free agency in 2027 and or in trades.

And they could also trade him right now since this isn't technically a new contract, like he just opted in so they can actually trade him right now when otherwise they would have to wait to what, like mid-December?

I do not believe for one second that the Miami Heat are playing for 2 years from now. I do not believe that they did what they just did a little more desperate than they would have liked to have done it because they threw 2 pieces in there that they did not want to throw in there, 2 pieces that were not in there 6 months ago.

Yakunčunas.

Oh, and, and Hakkez. They didn't want— they didn't want to trade Hakkez. He was not a part of what the original deal was.

I'll tell you something. Seen some offseason stuff. Jokkinen-Chunis looks good.

Yeah, he's good. He's a good player.

Dan, the job of a front office is to have to have that long-term vision when everyone else is clamoring for right now. Now, now you can say, oh, I don't believe that they would do it. But the reality is that contract tells you everything. That contract tells you everything. They set it up on purpose this way for the ability for them to have flexibility next year, understanding again, usually when we talk about the salary cap, it's a soft cap in the NBA. You can figure out a way you can overspend or whatever. We'll go to second apron, all these kind of options. That option is not available to the Miami Heat this year. For the entirety of the season, they are going to be stuck at $209 million, the absolute maximum they can spend.

The thing with the Heat and their free agency next year is that they've been setting up salary cap-wise for next year. Forever. The only two guys who are under contract going into next season at the moment are Bam Adebayo and Nikola Jović.

You think they'll keep Giannis?

If they're able to move off of that contract, that puts them at one guy outside of Giannis. So Davion Mitchell, a free agent headed into next year. They're going to have all sorts of spaces to play, which is why several months ago when we were talking about the possibility of Norman Powell coming back to Miami, we're all saying only if it's on a 1-year deal?

The Naked Gun remake.

That was good.

That was great.

Liam Neeson surprised me there. Did he surprise you? Put it on the poll at Le Batard Show: did Liam Neeson surprise you in the Naked Gun remake?

No, because I'm a movie guy. No no no no no no no no no no! You've gone too far.

Please get— that's the best comedy that Liam Neeson's ever made. Go get that sound for me of Liam Neeson being asked to take a pay cut. Uh, that was Liam Neeson in Naked Gun Remake was the second- best comedy that Liam Neeson has made in the last couple of years. Can you update us on the polls from today, Jeremy? Because Juju has to be out and we've got Morally Abhorrent in the postgame today. Mike's going to do that live so that you can get your soccer fix around here. And I've got a soccer question I want to ask the group here, but just update the polls from today, please.

Are you surprised cows and hogs kill more people than sharks?

It's a big one.

70.5% of the audience says no.

No. No.

We're learned.

Is Cedric Coward the worst name in sports? 68% of the audience says yes.

Yeah!

Does fatigue make Cedric cowards of us all?

That's a good question.

87% of the audience says yes.

Yeah!

Was Barbie a comedy? 83% of the audience says yes.

Yeah!

Sorry, Dan.

Was Barbie first and foremost a comedy? Huge distinction. 75% of the audience says yes.

Yeah.

Sorry.

Those are your polls.

Do you have any observations from yesterday's show? This is something—

Yeah, I'm glad we're getting to them now.

Yeah, it's a little late in today's show to talk about yesterday's show, but what are the observations that you have from yesterday's show?

I was really confused how you were projecting all of analytics onto one guy that Bobby Marks had cited and you were just like, just standing your ground on that one, no matter how many great points were made around you about how it was wrong. And I actually really appreciate it, just that you were moving the goalposts and locking in. Um, Robin is not a superhero, but he is a hero. This is similar to the way that, like, superstars and stars exist in the NBA. So, like, Nikola Jokic, superstar. Jamal Murray, star.

And if you like heroes, come out to Las Rosas today because I will definitely be playing Chad Kroeger's hero.

Dan, do you dislike broccoli or is it just broccolini?

I'm fine with broccoli. It's broccolini, bro. It's too bitter.

Rich man's food. Okay.

Yeah, I was— I just needed to be sure. I was surprised nobody asked that follow-up.

Um, they're not really similar though. Broccolini and broccoli don't taste anything alike.

That's why I asked the follow-up.

I don't even know why it's broccolini. I don't know. Is broccolini in the broccoli family? Like, what is broccoli?

You look at it like, yeah, it's like a wild—

it's like a crazy—

it's almost impossible.

Have you seen Victor Wembanyama's brother Oscar Wembanyama? He looks just like him, but he's not as tall. So Broccolini is like the Victor Wanyama and then Broccoli's Oscar Wanyama.

Kissing cousins. I'm looking it up now. I'll figure that out after. I think the vuvuzela is the worst instrument. If it classifies as an instrument.

It doesn't.

But I mean, it is. It's absolutely an instrument.

It's a plastic tube.

Is a kazoo an instrument?

Nobody takes vuvuzela lessons. Don't be stupid.

Well, you don't have to take a lesson for it to be an instrument.

He got your ass, Jeremy. Move on.

Okay, uh, Pablo has me fully convinced that this Kawhi trade to Toronto is just a total cover-up to get out of everything. Like, the way it was all laid out yesterday, the fact that they're gonna end up with Kawhi and all of a sudden a place he never wanted to be, but now he's cool with extending there and the Clippers wouldn't accept— it all feels like BS. And I can't believe that this is how this is all going to work out.

How are they going to do that? Uh, do you think they're going to try and dump this, news dump this on Friday? Like, is Kawhi going to end up getting traded and then they're just going to announce the penalty and they're all going to news dump it on Friday?

I think they're going to do it in the middle of the frenzy of transactions just to cover up their scent.

Where does broccoli rabe fall into the discussion?

It's sort of like broccolini. It's the same kind of bitter, and I don't like that very much either. Are you done with your observations, Jeremy, or do you have any other?

Last one.

Hey, more, man.

That North Carolina team with Ed Davis was so fun that won the championship. It was Ty Lawson, Danny Green, Wayne Ellington, Tyler Hansbrough. You had Tyler Zeller on that team as well. Oh my God. I love North Carolina basketball as a kid.

Ty Lawson in college, one of the fastest human beings I've ever seen in my entire life.

And if you didn't think Kendall Marshall a few years later was going to be the next Rajon Rondo, you weren't watching Carolina basketball.

By the way, Ty Lawson, I remember his pre-draft workout is when an 18-year-old Jrue Holiday put him in handcuffs. He was like, this is— this guy won the national championship and this 18-year-old who barely got off the bench at UCLA was just so dominant. It was like it was one of the greatest workouts I've ever seen.

Roy, can you please play for us the single funniest thing Liam Neeson has ever done?

There's a lot of discussion about it and a lot of healthy, unnecessary discussion about it because the disparity sometimes is disgraceful.

How do you think we can move past that?

We're starting, we're starting, and it has to start, you know, and it's starting with these extraordinary actresses. Brave ladies, and we as men have got to be part of it, you know. We started it, so we have to be part of the solution.

So would you take a pay cut to kind of equal things out?

No. Pay cut? No, no, no, no, no. That's going too far. No, there has to be parity. There just has to be.

He ain't lying.

He just said, though, that men, we have to be part of it. No.

But they should get paid more is his point.

Why would— no, no, I'm not—

why is it coming out of my paycheck? It's a good point. It's like, yeah, they need to get paid more. How about the people doing the paying? You could pay them more as opposed to keeping your profits.

But he just said we need to do our part.

No, he said men. We as men speaking out. The men that are doing the hiring and the paying of such.

Not the actors, not male actors, male executives.

No, no, no, no, no.

Pay cut. That's— that might be my favorite part. I've— we've fixated on the no for years, but it's the timing of the no. Hearing it again, hearing it again, it really hits home. That—

that's the part though. The part that gets me every time is the— is the cadence shift from how optically correct he was before that and how he gave no thought meaningfully to pausing at that question.

No, pay cut.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Right. So it, it took him aback.

He was, he was like, he had to resay it.

No, I don't think it took him aback. He was ready for it. Like usually when someone has a follow-up, like, no, like that was a crazy, like, hey, do you want bread? No, dude.

That was like, that was like fish. No, that was like the Iceman saying, hang tough, hang tough.

The same tone of hang tough, like, pay cut? You lost your mind?

Dan Levitar.

Analytics have/are ruining the game. We're playing AI hoops.

That's his team! His team's in the forefront of all that!

Damn, Zazz, don't steal my thunder!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sorry.

Jonathan Sasslow.

I get carried away.

This is the Dan Levitar Show. I just want to play the whole thing again so that people can hear how little of a pause there was when she asked him that question, because it was real and true indignance that he has considered this, and when he considered it, he rejected it out of hand.

There's a lot of discussion about it, and a lot of healthy and necessary discussion about it, because the disparity sometimes is Disgraceful.

How do you think we can move past that?

We're starting. We're starting, and it has to start, you know, and it's starting with these extraordinary actresses and brave ladies, and we as men have got to be part of it, you know. We started it, so we have to be part of the solution.

So would you take a pay cut to kind of equal things out?

No. Pay cut? No, no, no, no, no, that's going too far. No, there has to be parody. There just has to be.

Do you guys believe that upsets are good for the World Cup? It's a conversation we have around March Madness quite a bit where people like the upsets on the first couple of days, but when the Final Four arrives, they want the big boys playing.

So I don't like all the Cinderellas and all the upsets in the NCAA tournament because when we get to the Sweet 16 and we get to the Elite Eight I want the blue bloods. I want the big boys playing. I want the best possible games. But I am gonna find myself, and I found myself yesterday, and you saw Netherlands get knocked off and Germany get knocked off. I'm going to be rooting for these upsets because we got skin in the game here. And I feel like the, the most advantageous way for the US to continue to advance in this tournament is if they play some lesser teams, if some of the big boys get knocked out early. So So because I got someone who I'm rooting for here, yeah, I'm rooting for upsets.

You always want great matches, and I think one of the chief concerns with an expanded World Cup was this round never existed before. Some teams are going to be getting into the knockout stages that in previous incarnations would never. Paraguay was one of those teams, and we all expected Germany to absolutely drill them, and they showed they belong. And put up a historic upset for all time. So while, as someone that has tickets to Philadelphia on July 4th, was very much looking forward to Germany-France— oh, that hurts, no doubt— but the memory of that PK shootout in particular and the narrative that game took as it went on with Germany having to chase the game That was an all-time game. When I put it in the group chat today, no one had a better upset in knockout stage history outside of a final that happened in the 1950s that no one was alive for.

There's two of them in the '50s that were pretty big. But the thing about Germany, so there's a lot of history here. So number one, this is the first time they've lost a shootout in like 50 years. That you got to start there. This is what we saw yesterday was a historic historic collapse by them. Number 2, as we spoke about earlier, the idea that they got to a point where, alright guys, and now I've seen the video of the coach saying, alright, who's next? And guys are like, not me. Like, imagine that happening.

Is that real though?

Like, you, you—

wait a minute, hold on a second, because you said this earlier in the show and I didn't seize on it, okay? You addressed it as a rumor. You said it has not been verified, but that Germany's veterans didn't want to step up for the penalty kicks. That sounds like a level of cowardice that no one will admit to. I don't think it's a fair accusation to make if you haven't verified it. What— under what grounds do you think? Usually I'm told that athletes— and athletes say this one all the time— no, I don't want the opposing player, the best opposing player on the team, to be hurt. I want to beat their best at their best. And you're telling me guys are asking out of the pressurized situation?

I can see it with the young players. The first two guys that took it for Germany were Kai Havertz and Kimmich, and they've been around, so maybe they did so reluctantly. Kimmich looked pretty decisive and he was into it, and Havertz historically never shies away from big moments. Being clutch Kai is kind of his thing. But everybody else, telling you, this, this over-the-head shot on the Skycam, it is really revealing.

The keeper was doing all types of waltzing. I watched it. What was he doing in So he's, he's pointing like, first of all, he's pointing, are you going to go this way?

How are you going to angles away?

You go this way. The save that he does where he doesn't even dive, it was all mind games the entire—

you're talking about the Bono one.

Yeah.

In, in Morocco.

Yeah.

So far the two keepers and I mean, this is a very small sample, the two keepers that have been more about the histrionics of getting in the head of the pen takers have been the better keepers in these PK shootouts.

So Cape Verde has a 40-year-old keeper, and I was talking earlier yesterday about how this is the smallest team to ever advance this far in terms of nation size. It's 525,000 residents. It's smaller than every one of the United States, smaller than even Wyoming. Do you want them, Zazz, to advance only because you want the United States to have a better chance?

Right.

Because the small countries, you're going to have the better chance against them. But you're not— it's not because you're rooting for the underdog, the fairy tale story.

If I may, Dan and Sazh, if they advance in this round, you know who they're beating? Argentina. Argentina! The reigning World Cup champions with the greatest player arguably ever. Yeah, that's the greatest upset in the history of sport.

Well, I don't think people would want that though. I don't think—

you don't think people want to experience the single greatest upset in the history of sport?

No, not if it knocks out Messi and then you don't have Messi in the later rounds. People were very excited on the first couple of days when it was all the big names doing all of the goal scoring. I don't— I think people now stop rooting for the upset unless they're doing what Zazz is doing, which is just, I want my team to have a better chance.

Dan, I, I gotta disagree with you here. I've been thinking about it. I don't think it's like March Madness where we like the upsets, but at the end we want to see Duke, North Carolina, Kentucky, Kansas. The World Cup is something bigger than all of that. And so people want great matchups, and if we see a titan fall No one's like, oh my God, now I got to watch Paraguay versus whoever in the final. They're like, wow, it's crazy. This is the final.

And so far on name recognition, I know Netherlands and Germany are like, wow, those are shocking. But Morocco made it to the third place match last World Cup. Morocco is more talented than Netherlands. That was a very tight line going into it. I didn't know who was going to win that game. I wanted to see it play out because I didn't know who was genuinely better. And while Germany, name brand, no doubt, not a strong German team that I, I think anybody really had winning this thing. So far we haven't had one of those teams that are like, man, well, that ruins a potential great final. For me, the number one thing I want to see is just how the world reacts. They're on opposite sides of the bracket. I want the drama of Portugal-Argentina. I want that as the final. That'd be great. But the next best thing for me is a potential first-time winner or an African nation making a deep run. Having someone enter the new class of global elite, because that means along the way I have had an historic result.

The, the— there's always a feeling from people like myself who— that FIFA is a very Eurocentric organization and the European football model and everything. That's like, that's the class. And everyone else is just like you vagabonds that were allowed to get in here. So there's a part of me that watches yesterday, and I'm, I'm with Mike. Yeah, of course you want to see Germany versus France. That's a great game, great matchup. But seeing two European powers get knocked out nice and quick. Oh, I love it. I love this idea that we're going to a place where they don't have— they're going to have France and that's it. The other storyline that's, that's, I think, really interesting that we— I don't know if we've talked about it. The number of players who are competing in the World Cup who are born not just in France France, but literally in the suburbs of Paris, is far and away the highest number of any concentration of players from anywhere else in the world. Only, you know, a handful of them obviously play for Paris. A lot of them play for Morocco, for Algeria, for Senegal. That's a big deal, Dan.

If I told you the Dream Team, right, or we go to the Olympics and I said, yeah, most of these players came from Hialeah, right? Not just came from America or came from Miami. They came out from this neighborhood. That is an insane level of concentration. The only thing I can compare it to— Mike is a music guy, you might appreciate this— that like Motown, it's like, uh, Aretha Franklin, Stevie Wonder, and Smokey Robinson all grew up within like 3 blocks of one another and did not know each other.

It's just that like, for sports, Western PA for quarterbacks.

There you go. Yeah.

Is the neighborhood Oakland?

Is that where it is? It is a— they call it the banliyo, and it's Like, it is, in Paris, you know, urban housing development happens in the suburbs. They don't have it in the middle of town like we do, like in New York or whatever. They put their housing projects on the suburbs, outside of the city. So yes, it is an underserved community, if you will.

Hialeah.

How does Ben Affleck wake up in the morning knowing that that's how he said Hialeah?

Hialeah.

How does no one correct him?

As a guy who's fluent in Spanish, by the way. It's not like he's just some gringo. He speaks fluent Spanish, so it's like he lived in Mexico as a kid, right, for a couple of years, I believe. That's why he speaks fluent Spanish. That's kind of funny.

Hola.

Uh, Roy, see if in the next 2 minutes you can somehow find the shocking audio we have played before of Ben Affleck speaking perfect Spanish, because he does. Uh, Mike said flatly that Morocco is about as talented as the Netherlands. Chris Whittingham disagrees. He says if the Netherlands want to get back to their true identity, they should just hire Morocco's manager. So much braver with a worse team on paper.

I disagree. I love Chris. I agree with him. He knows more about the sport.

Thank you.

The Dutch team, I don't think is as talented as Morocco. And I think that's because people overlook the amount of talent. The best player on that pitch is Hakimi, who is a Champions League legend now at this point and already accomplished in the World Cup. So I think that they were stronger in many areas, especially in the attack.

Yeah, I said this to Película. See, he Dijo: no lo quiero, no quiero que tú lo hagas. Entonces tuve la oportunidad de hablar con él para una hora o algo como eso, y le pregunté: ¿qué son las cosas más importantes de esta historia para ti? Y él me dijo 1, 2, 3 cosas, pero él me preguntó: ¿tener el character? ¿Cómo se dice? El personaje de Howard Weinstein. De Chris Tucker, que tenemos con nosotros ahora, también de Jorge Raveling. El tercero y más importante fue que me dijo: "Tienes que tener Viola Davis para mi madre." Y le pregunté: "Ay, es como preguntar si puede jugar a basketball." Y dije: "Sí, pero tiene que tener Michael Jordan." Minor league reliever named Steve Sharts. No, there's not.

From 1985 to 1990.

High school had to be rough for him.

I need that jersey.