Transcript of The Big Suey: The Cuban Heisman Speech (feat. Josh Pate)

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Happy Chinuca. This guy is really good. He is prolific. Josh Pate comes on live on Saturdays and all over your week, giving college football analysis and information that is instant and very strong. Josh, thank you for being on the program. Give me the precedent or historical comp to the surprise that Indiana is this year.

Man, I guess you'd have to go to college basketball Dan, to find the most ready parallel for it. I'm just not sure it really happens in college football. And I also want to remind people, last year was the flash. If you were to have what we historically in sports, we call a flash in the pan, last would have been that, right? You've got a guy who takes over a bottom-d dwelling Big Ten program. Indiana exists in the Big Ten so that Ohio State, Michigan, Penn State, et cetera, can rack up wins. He takes over that job. He imports his James Madison roster. James Madison makes the playoff the next year, mind you. Indiana makes the playoff and then gets better the year after that and makes the playoff and is the number one overall seed. I don't know what the parallel is for it. I will tell you the whole side lane of all this has been how bad it makes other coaches look, because every other coach is out there begging for patience, and they're trying to sell their booster class and their administrative class that it takes two, three years minimum. And that used to work.

And now all of that's burned up because your fan base and your donor base and your AD even knocks on your door and says, Hey, you've got infinitely more resources, at least we thought, than Signetti has at Indiana. Why has he been able to do it? And they really have no answer.

I've been maintaining claiming, arguing that Vanderbilt had its best season ever, Missouri, best season ever, Texas Tech, best season ever, Indiana, best season ever. Is there anyone else? And is this just a product of what you're talking about? You can just get a coach now, and a coach and quarterback can go from North Texas to Oklahoma State, and you can fix your program by just doing it that quickly.

I think you can. I think there's a lot of truth to that. Now, I also think it is fraught with vulnerability because you could also try it and crash and burn, or you could have what's happened at Florida State, where you go and you do it one time. You portal your way to success one time, and it crystallizes this belief that you can just do that every year. And really, that's not anyone's aim, Dan. That's not even Signetti's aim at Indiana. That's not Clark's aim. I'm in Nashville, down the road at Vanderbilt. That's not their aim. Their aim is really to build through high school recruiting. It's just they realized, what are we doing? We're really building through high school recruiting just so the big boys can come in two years from now. When they've developed on our dime and they portal out. So they've got to lean a little more heavy in the portal than that. But I also think there's this other thing happening. So as the portal, as NIL is elevating the level that those programs can operate at, I would also ask you, look around the country today versus a decade ago.

Tell me where the dominant line of scrimmage play is. Nobody, your Alabama's, your Texas's, nobody has dominant offensive line play anymore. And that used to be the catch-all. That used be what completely yanked your lifeline out of the wall. Was their ability, the big boys' ability to just lean and lean and lean. And football is a game where you get to put your hands on other people. And so at a certain point, you're powerless because it's not college basketball. No one really possesses that. They have it in spurts. Teams have it in spurts, but no one, wire to wire, possesses that. Even among the playoff teams right now, who's dominant? On the offensive and defensive lines, the way Bama would have been a decade ago, the way Georgia was even five years ago. So I think those two things happening at the same time have opened the door for some things that we used to say could never happen in college football.

How much would you argue with me if I said Texas Tech should be favored to win the championship?

I'd argue a little bit. I've watched them a couple of times, really, really up close. And the only thing that I would push back on is, I don't know that they would have the quarterback play to get them over the top. I think eventually, quarterbacks have to win games. We're all going to watch Miami and A&M Saturday, for example. Those are two really good pass rushes. Those are two teams that can shut the other team's run game down. And it eventually just comes down to, can Carson Beck really have a few series that he puts together where he wins the game? Can Marcel Reid do that? Well, I would ask the same question at Texas Tech. And I do think that they have a defensive side of the ball. They're just littered with Sunday talent, littered with SEC Big Ten talent. Can they win three of them? Can they string together three of them? And do I think that they could consistently do that enough to be considered the favorite? That's where I'd back a little bit because even though everyone's fallible at this point, I think I trust other quarterback situations more than theirs.

Hey, Josh, big fan. Go, Frates, the Michigan job. You've been ahead of this story, and your most recent podcast shed a lot of light on it. How quickly do you think that we actually see this job filled? Because there's a lot of questions to be asked in Michigan and its leadership. If I'm a head coach, am I signing with a program that may be under scrutiny? Will I still have that same AD that hired me?

Yeah, look, it's really interesting how that search is going to happen, actually. We just saw a Penn State search where for better or for worse, the athletic director ran point on it. I don't know that that's the way the Michigan search is operating, but I also don't know what the future of Ward manual is there. In fact, they may just be putting that off until they hire the head coach. That is a very, very strange situation, I will grant you to jump into. The counterpoint to that is a little birdie flew in my ear last night and told me, Do you realize since we fired Ward, we've actually had an uptick in our NIL contributions. Reading between the lines, that tells me there were a lot of deep pocketed people up there that were not very happy, just with the general direction, just with the general existence of the program with Sheron. I think Sheron, if you zoom it out to 50,000 feet, was always looked at by a lot of people up there as a bridge coach. We're going to put you in place at the tail end of the Harbaugh stuff, right in the middle of the NCAA stuff.

We don't know what's going to be on the other side of this bridge, and it's really foggy. Well, the fog lifted. The worst case scenario didn't happen. And then you're just stuck with a coach that, truthfully, was bottom quarter to bottom half of the Big Ten from a caliber standpoint. And then you get this mess dropped in your lap. So it ends the way it ends. I think they look at it and say, It really doesn't matter which direction we go, we're going to upgrade. Whether that's true or not, that's what they believe. I think they're really ready to spend. And I think a lot of candidates are going to be sold on that idea. It's not false, by the way. I mean, it's like an untapped oil field up from an NIL donor perspective, and it's the Michigan job. And if you're going after Calin DeBore, yes, I always thought it was going to be really hard to pull him away from Alabama. I still feel that. I know they won't give up until they actually get him looking them in the eyes and saying no, like A Twitter statement is not going to do for them, and I get that.

I don't think they're getting to bore. But if you go after a Kenny Dillingham, for example, if you go after a Jed Fish, those guys, probably given their current situation versus what they could inherit at Michigan, could be willing to say, You know what? I'll assume a little bit of that risk because of the reward that I think I could bring us, and it could bring me there. To answer the first part of the question, I think it's going to go on a little bit because I really do think they insist on getting a firm, firm no from Kaylyn DeBore. That could be as early as Friday night or Saturday of this week, or if they just keep winning, it could be as late as into the new year, and they got to adjust their timeline accordingly, probably if that happens. But I do think once they get the no, and I do think it'll be a no from Kaylen, you move on to a Kenny Dillingham or a Jed Fish, I think that's when you start to really see rubber meat road there, because I don't know that either of those guys are able to turn down the full force of what the Michigan offer would be.

I'd take that job in a second if I were DeBore. Get out from under all the saving stuff and just start over in a place with happier- Same pressure.

But you're not following the guy.

You're following the guy after the guy. I don't think it is the same pressure, actually. And it's a place where you're new on hope, you're not stained. But I'll put this on the poll, please, Juju, at Lebitard Show. Is Josh too young to have little birdies flying in his ear? And look up for me why it is that it is a little birdie that flies into someone's ear with information. Is it carrier pigeon related?

Josh, you mentioned a couple of months ago that you believe that there is a job, a big job, that is going to open up because something is happening. Were you talking about the Michigan job?

Yes, I was talking about the Michigan job. I believed that that job was going to open up because I thought it had two possibilities. The first was just competitively. I believe I said it after they had lost the Oklahoma game. So you still knew that you had the trip to USA coming up. They lost that one, and you had the Ohio State game coming up. If They lost one other game along the lines. I thought they could have fired Cheron just because competitively, they didn't think that he was meeting the standard. But that was also armed with the knowledge that there was this other stuff going on in the background. Now, it would be a I told a lie if I told you, Man, hey, I knew Michigan had caused to fire him right in and there. They didn't even know they had full caused to fire him until last week. So I just thought, if they're looking for a reason, maybe they're given a reason on the field. But look, all I was doing at that point was that going what a lot of people in the business were saying, and that was, Hey, with the Penn State job coming open, and, Oh, Florida just fired Napier, and, Oh, LSU made a move.

As all that hurricane started to swirl, I kept on getting told, Hey, the Michigan job may come open. The Michigan job is probably going to come open. And at that point, if you remember, no one was considering that as a possibility. Michigan was ranked. They were fined. They had come out of the NCAA scandal stuff. So that was really not on the radar. And I was just thinking to myself, Man, with all these other big jobs opening up, if Michigan gets thrown into the fold here, what is that about to do to the hiring cycle? And it did get thrown into the fold just after the other jobs already got taken.

Greg Cody, you had a great many objections to Pavia's behavior this weekend around the Heisman ceremony.

Well, look, it was a Cinderella story, right? Mendoza is the first Cuban-American ever to win the Heisman. He was great with his speech. Indiana, Cinderella story. It was a wonderful night. And then Pavia, the runner up, embarrasses himself in his school by what he wrote on Instagram. I'm just wondering what your thoughts were on that.

I learned last year that if you're going to take Diego Pavia, you got to develop this different filter. I called it the Pavia filter. It's a reference I've used several times where that's just going to get caught in the filter. Now, you could choose to reject him, not like him, and I consider that last year, at which point I would have just been turned off by all of it. Yeah, I hate that stuff. Can't stand it. I just learned that, Hey, man, if I'm going to let him in, if I'm going to accept him, if he's going to be in my bubble, I'm going to have to accept to a certain extent that You don't get the competitive character that you get, whether you like it or not. You don't get the competitive character you get from a guy that's 5, 8 on a good day, playing at a Heisman level without a little bit of that mental edge. Because I don't think if he has that you know what about him, I don't even think that he's there to begin with. I think it's just been mandatory for him. The other part of that, I'm interested to see what you guys think about this, because I don't get tied up in the Heisman a whole lot.

But the award says it's for the most outstanding player in college football. And if you eliminate everything you think about Diego Pavia off the field or the way he runs his mouth or everything like that, I don't know that I saw a more dynamic player, more important to their team this year than him. But my working theory on why Mendoza won in such a runaway fashion was with all the coaching stuff happening in the middle of the year. I don't think people paid a whole lot of attention to the Heisman race until the last weekend of the season. And that's why you go into that Saturday, Diego is like a co-favorite with Fernando Mendoza. And by the end of the Big Ten title game, which was a 13 to 10 game, Mendoza's odds are minus 3,000. I found it curious that that performance was the end-all be-all indicator in the Heisman odds market. But there's not an outrage for me either way. But I do think Diego Pavi, man, I learned a long time ago, you're either going to accept that with him or you're just going to have to toss him out entirely.

Kam Ward threw for 2,000 more yards than Mendoza. That was just given to him because he was 22 TD, zero interceptions in in the red zone, and we didn't expect anything from that football team. He had two moments. Pavia did not have two moments. He had the moment against Penn State, and he beat Ohio State. It's all he needed to win that trophy.

Pavia more passing yards in one fewer games than Mendoza and led Vanderbilt in rushing, I think, seven of their twelve games this year. Yeah, I'm with you on that.

It's silly, but when you have an upset of that kind, it doesn't make any sense to see Indiana be good at football. They were good once with Pennex. I think in the last 20 years, aren't they 50 or 60 games below 500 in the last 20 years? And all of a sudden, they're beating Ohio State. Who is the favorite? Who's the favorite to win the championship?

If you believe Vegas, Ohio State is. I don't know that Ohio State feels that way right now after what Indiana did to him. Look at me. I'm shaking as I talk. I have no idea.

Okay. His YouTube channel, you have to watch and subscribe at joshpatesfb, and he's the host of Josh Pates College Football Show. A lot of good information there. Josh, thank you for being on. We appreciate it.

I appreciate you, Jeff.

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I wouldn't expect you to apologize. You're a giant infant. You have no control over your emotions. You have no control over your emotions. When you're calling someone you know an idiot, I don't deserve it. I don't deserve it, and you're a fool for saying it. Okay.

Stugatz.

You're a fool. I was following you.

You're locking in right now. You're locking in on us? Yeah. All right. Let's drop the gloves, pal.

Let's drop the... You should be thanking me.

For what? Every day. For what? For what I've done around this character. And the second shit gets real for you, you want to come at me and call Are you a fool? No, no, no, no.

Seriously. Jeremy- Seriously, pal. I've added 10 years to your career. This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugats. A number of different college football things that I want to get to with you guys. You liked the Mendoza speech, you liked the Miami speech, you liked the Cuban kid reaching the masses at the downtown athletic club.

I mean, he's the most Miami player who's ever won the Heisman Trophy. The Canes have had two Heisman winners. Neither one of them were Miami guys.

He's the most Balen players ever win the Heisman Trophy.

He's the most Balen/Columbus. He went to both schools. He went to both schools. He went to both schools. He would take offense to being called the Balen kid, though. I don't understand. Really?

Greg, respectfully. Respectfully. Okay, I like you, Greg. That was not a Miami speech whatsoever. That was a Columbus speech. If you want a Miami speech, I will give you a Miami speech.

Would you like what the Cuban Miami Heisman speech should have sounded like? I would love that. Because you're a Broward guy.

He did speak Spanish a little bit. Porley. Porley.

A little bit. Okay. Porley, I mean, come on, have some But would you not agree that he's the most Miami guy to ever win the Heisman?

He ranks above the two Canes who won.

Yeah, Vinnie Testiverdi and Gino Toretta don't give off a whole lot of Kendall.

They're from New York and California.

Although, looking at Vinnie, not speaking, but looking at Vinnie, Vinnie could pass for Cuban. I do believe he could-We can claim him.

We can claim Vinnie.

Just visually. Testa Reddi. Can we put you... Let's go find you a Heisman room, write up a speech and do a dead... Let's go. Go to the Heisman, go to the downtown athletic club elsewhere in our building and tell me when you're ready. Tell me when your Miami speech- I'm going to write it up right now.

It's going to be a Miami speech. If I would have won the Heisman, this is what it would have sounded like if I would have won.

Excellent. I want to do Funiest Thing from the Sports Weekend with you guys here as Tony gets that ready, and then we'll close out the segment with Tony's Heisman speech. But are you guys ready to do Funiest Thing from the Sports Weekend? Yes. Okay. Get the imaging ready here because I have a nominee. Also, do me the favor, video of just finding for me a photo so I could present it to the audience of a Seattle Seahawk named Bradley Russell, just Find me a photograph of Bradley Russell and put it on the screen. I will wait for you as I nominate what was, for me, the funniest thing from the sports weekend. It involves Bradley Russell. Hit the imaging, Chris. Hey, people. Tell us what in the sport made you laugh hardest this weekend. It is a segment we call What Made You laugh This Weekend. I don't know if you guys saw this during what I'm going to call the Philip Rivers game, because I do believe that a whole lot of people in the four o'clock window- He was awesome. Didn't care about Green Bay and Denver, certainly didn't care about New Orleans and the Panthers.

Panthers still in the mix. Panthers are in the mix. Awful. I heard the announcement shout, Holy Guacamole, on the late hit that won the game for the Saints there. I hadn't heard a Holy Guacamole on television in a while. Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Do you love when the sports announcement, yields Holy Guacamole? But My funniest thing from the sports weekend is that in the Colts Seahawks game, the Seahawks at one point ran a little roll out, Sam Darnold. He threw it to this guy, Bradley Russell. And what What happened is he just simply dropped the ball. He was wide open, and the rollout fooled the Colts, and they just threw it to Bradley Russell, and the announcers torched him as soon as he didn't catch it. This is what they did. They're like, That's his first touch this season, and that's going to be his last touch this season. He will never be trusted again in that situation as long as he lives. The announcement just buried him. He will never again get that touch. Those teammates will never trust him again to catch the football in that situation. Never? That's what they were doing.

They crushed him. I have rarely heard an announcing team, Annihinate a Nobody, the way this announcing team went out of its way to point out that poor Bradley Russell, who dropped that ball, will never again catch a ball in his experience playing football. Mike Ryan, what was your funniest thing from the sports weekend?

Well, I wanted to go with one or two things. Hopefully, we have the video of Messi playing passes with a politician that was basically granted a make-a-wish in India. The reason we do not have a Championship Trophy parade for Inter Miami is because Messi just decided to take millions upon millions in going to India and subjecting himself to this stuff. By the way, there was a full-on riot. Oh, my God. Full-on riot at one of the stadiums because Messi was shielded by huge throngs of people, and the only people allowed on the pitch with Messi were politicians and privileged people. These people in India lost their minds, started throwing the seats from the stadium. It was a full-on riot. I also have a 1B, which was Roy on Friday saying he needed to get his legs under him for a media skate. You realize I paid for that, right? Paid actual money. Yeah, well. You missed the championship being won. This is your title, too. The Dan Levatard show with Stugatz owns the cyclones. This was a victory for all. David Dworak was there. Jordan McPherson was there. Roy left us at the I knew you guys had it in the bag.

Roy, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?

I want to show a picture from W.

W. Saturday Night's main event and John Cina's final match. Just before he tapped out the Gunther, he had a smirk on his face in a sleeper hole.

They looked like one of those memes saying, What opinion do you have that's going to have you in this position?

We're going to get back to that. Zazlo was there, and I want to cover more of this. Zazlo was in attendance for that. Cina submitted the first time in his career. He's a quitter. He has punctuation on his career. One of the rare times you will see a scripted event end up amid the headlines in sports because a guy has done something that's so dramatic. There is nothing other than wrestling that is like this, where you get a major sports headline-It was a phenomenon. That was scripted. Jeremy, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?

Both funny and relatable. Josh Allen admitted that he throws every single game on the sideline.

They caught him this week. He's surprised he hasn't been caught more often, but every game he throws up. Dennis Erickson used to do that before the game.

That's why the bills aren't going to ever win a Super Bowl.

Probably different reasons.

Chris, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend.

I mean, the Chiefs being eliminated from playouts before the Dolphins.

What are you laughing about, Greg?

What Mike said about Dennis Erickson. I've witnessed some of that without going into detail. Go on. I mean, that thing. I covered UM for four years.

Greg, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?

I have a quick addendum to what Mike said about Lionel Messi's tour of India. Erected in India was a statue of Lionel Messi. Now, it's common in the statue game for statues to be slightly larger than life. In this case, the Messi statue is 70 feet tall. That's right, 12 and a half times bigger than the 5'7 Messi.

Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Is twelve and a half times bigger than the human being too big for a statue? Yes or no? Zazlo, what was the funniest thing from the sports weekend?

On the Fox pregame show, I don't know if you know, but Tom braided, he's a broadcaster for Fox, and he was in studio with those guys, and they were making a list. They were doing rankings of best gifts because it's a holiday season, best gifts that a player has given his teammates. And very high up on the list, presented as such by Aaron Andrews and Chris Thompson, was a gift that Tom braided gave his offensive lineman one time.

Tom braided, of course, that's when his team went undefeated in the regular season. He gifted his O-line. Ready? Brand new luxury SUVs. What a class act. You guys.

What a guy.

What a guy. I want you guys to pay attention. There's a catch. Tom braided, stop stealing our line. The catch to all this is the cars were on a one-year lease.

The makers can't be cheesers, all right?

Come on. One-year lease. Here, I'm giving you a gift, but you can only have it for a year.

I wonder if he had to actually pay for that or just do a sponsorship deal with the car dealership where he comes out, does autografts a couple of times, and all his offensive linemen get a one-year lease. You know it.

But that is so cheap. That is so cheap. If I'm the lineman, I would rather get a Kia than I can own than a one-year lease.

It's not that cheap in that something like that probably costs a great deal of money. A one-year lease on a luxury vehicle like that.

What could a monthly lease be? A thousand bucks?

No, it's going to be tens of thousands of dollars that will end up costing him per lineman. Yeah.

So like 50,000 A thousand bucks is what he paid in totality for his offense. That sounds cheap.

If he paid anything at all. What's your guess, though? Do you think he paid his own cash or he just had a deal with the dealership?

Yeah, totally. That deal with the dealership.

Beggers can't be choosers.

What does that even mean?

Another funny thing from the weekend. You know what it means? You can't deny that this was funny. Everything related to Philip Rivers was funny, including that he played beyond where it is that perhaps you thought he would play, but can't throw the ball downfield at all. It's going to be just bubble screens and screen passes and slants, and there's just nothing else there. But I did like watching his high school team, watching him because he's a grandfather, and his high school team, how cool must that be for a high school team to watch their coach be with them on Monday with no indication whatsoever that he's ever going to play again, and they're young enough that they actually haven't seen him play. My guess is that seventh-graders, sixth-graders might not have been paying a whole lot of attention to Philip Rivers' playing days, and then he plays in the game. And among other things, Mike Ryan bet for him to have more than half a rushing yard. He ended with negative one-half rushing yard.

Exhilarating, though. What a great goof bet.

I will say I followed him with the bet.

Oh, come on. That was the one show of solidarity that I had with the old guy.

Negative five yards.

There was no chance.

That one where he fell down. Oh, yeah, that was good. Then he got up and started run.

He did almost get a yard on that play. He almost got Mike Ryan's 0. 5 of a yard on the play where he fell down and just crawled around a little bit.

I can't believe he was able to get up there.

One of my favorite bets ever.

Can I read you this tweet that Chase Daniel, the former quarterback, retweeted about Philip Rivers? Listen to this. No coincidence that Rivers goes back to the NFL right before his health insurance clock runs out. When you have a 20-person deep roster at home, you got to do what you got to do before the five-year clock is up post-playing. Now the clock resets.

That's pretty good there to get 10 kids, a bunch of health care that comes in, grandfathered in, literally grandfathered in on Philip Rivers because he has so many children.

He was solid, dude. That was... I mean, he was good. Physically built solid. He had a countdown pass, which is more than you can say for the Seahawks. The Seahawks won with only field goals. But for him to show up on a couple of days notice, clearly at his shape, haven't played in five years against what is reputed to be the league's toughest defense with the league's most brilliant defensive mind calling the plays, that was really impressive.

Everyone just running like a six-yard out, and he throws it as soon as he snaps it, just lobs it, and it takes them like that. I love that. Folks, listen up. You know my holiday pattern by now. Every single year, I tell myself, Listen, Chris, you're going to be thoughtful this You're going to get good gifts. You're not going to be lazy. You're not just going to get gift cards. And this year, guys, I have news. I pulled it off. No panic, no sad little card. You know what I gave? I gave an aura frame. Why is it so hard to find a personal gift these days? It's for the people I'm closest to, my parents, my wife, my in-laws, my kid, the most important people in my world. I have no idea what I'm supposed to get them as a gift. But one thing I know, people light up when they get photos. People love photos. So I loaded up my aura frame with all the moments I know they'll love, my daughter being adorable, random selfies, group pictures where none of us are looking in the same direction. I kept adding them because Aura lets you send unlimited photos and videos right from your phone anytime.

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Marty Supreme, Christmas Day. Marty Supreme, Christmas Day. Marty Supreme, Christmas Day. Marty Supreme, Christmas Day. You know what I'm going to be doing on Christmas Day, and it's going to be watching Marty Supreme because I didn't even need to know that critics were calling Marty Supreme a full-throttled masterpiece and the best movie of the year. I already knew that was going to be the case. From A24 and starring Timothée Chalamet, alongside powerhouse cast Gwyneth Paltrow, Odessa Ozian, and Tyler O'Koma, Marty Supreme, Christmas Day, only in theaters. Hey, everyone. It's Jeremy here. Happy holidays. And I know that during the holiday season, my personal favorite part is getting to spend time with family, spend time with friends, reminiscing over years past of the holidays that we spent together before. But in my case, there have been some years I haven't been able to be around, mostly because of work. I'm lucky to live near my family. But I know for some of you, that might not be the case. And if there's distance between you or even if it is a work conflict, you don't have to feel disconnected from your family during the holidays. And a great way to stay connected is one 800flowers.

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Dan Levatard.

Yeah, very nice one. Imagine if someone told you you couldn't have a Corvette.

Stugatz.

I'm a grown-ass man who Who's not filthy rich. I can't afford a Lamborghini. Well, I probably can, but that's beside. Hey.

.

This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugatz.

So he puts them in position for the game-winning field goal. I mean, to show you, look, he hadn't played in forever, okay? It was third and seven, and they still ran the ball so that they could attempt a 60-yard field goal to take the lead. That's how much they trusted me in a big spot. But they make a 60-yard field goal to go ahead with under a minute to go. It was so cool. He was going to win this game on the road in Seattle. I don't know what the fix is. I'm so tired of these NFL games where one team gets the ball back with 35, 40 seconds left, and it's just so easy to get into field goal range with that little time.

At the end of that game- It's not dramatic. What you had happening at the end of that game is the Colts run the ball to get into position for the 60-yard field goal, and then Seattle comes back and takes the lead with a 57-yard field goal. The field goal kickers have gotten too good. They're eliminating some of the drama from these things where the quarterback doesn't have to put together a game-winning drive. He just has to put together a game-winning throw.

And very low-key, I think the new touchback rule also helps. Those five yards make a difference when it comes to all those long field goals.

Maybe under two minutes left, the touchback, I don't know, it's not at the 25.

It's ruining the sport, the longer field goals.

It's ruining the drama. It's not ruining the sport. The games are all so close that you can't ruin the sport. It is ruining the drama that you're speaking of because that particular game, it was 60-yard field goal, 57-yard field goal, and then Philip Rivers haunted from the beyond on the situation he's always in. I I still got to go 70 yards, and I've gotten 11 seconds.

I can't believe we got it, though. It looked like we wouldn't get it. But Philip Rivers down a score with one minute left. It was such great nostalgia. And then he hit the field goal, and then we saw Philip Rivers on the sideline, jawing at folks and being charged up. It was a great nostalgia trip.

I've actually heard Shane Gillis talk about how much he loved the Philip Rivers interaction, where Philip Rivers, five years ago, had a shutdown at Jacksonville, and he just is running like a little kid next to the Jacksonville defensive lineman. He's like, 90-yard, countdown, 90-yard, countdown. And understandably, the Jacksonville defensive lineman goes to the referee and says, Do you see how he's talking to me? And Philip Rivers is like, What? I'm not allowed to be excited? I'm not allowed to be excited? And the Jacksonville defensive is like, Just don't do it near my ear. And he's like, I will do it near your ear. I will be excited near your ear. So yesterday, what ends up happening, though, is that Philip Rivers gets you the game-winning drive. Then Seattle gets the ball back, and they have the game-winning drive. And I was denied my Philip Rivers purgatory because he had timeouts and 11 seconds left.

I think they had all three.

They had all three, but he immediately just drops back, and the first time, he's throwing it downfield interception because- I had that over-interception that cashed on that last play.

Are you kidding me? That's an interception waiting to happen. A 44-year-old guy who hadn't played in six years. Come on. The over-runter on I-N-T should have been 2. 5.

This was a fun curiosity that ate up the 4: 00 window. But can you give me some Fernando Mendoza sound from the Heisman ceremony.

This is not from the Heisman that I have. This is from him after the Big Ten Championship.

I love this sound. Give me some sound to just set up Mendoza before we go to Tony and what should have been a more Miami Heisman speech. It sounds so beautiful.

I to give all the glory to God.

We were never supposed to be in this position, but by the glory of God, the great coaches, great teammates, everyone we have around us, we were able to pull this off. Whoever thought the Hoosers would be here, but now the Hoosers are flipping chams.

Let's go.

Flipping.

Flipping Everybody said that that sounds the way Jeremy looks. At Levitard Show, put it on the poll, does an excited Fernando Mendoza sound the way that Jeremy looks. Let's go out now to Tony, who has a total He's totally prepared. His Miami. There he is. We go to Tony right now in the downtown athletic club. He is going to give us a more Miami speech than the one Mendoza gave us. Do you need anything from us over here, Tom?

No, Dan, I'm good. I'm ready to go. I'm just very thankful. I just wanted to get this off my chest really quick so we can wear it so you know exactly what it looks like when I have it around my neck here. Cuban roots, okay? So this is what I would have worn over the I would have worn it just like this, just so people knew and I would have flashed it. When you're ready, I'm ready to go. Dan, I got my speech written out. I'm very excited.

All right, let's do this now. This is Tony's Fernando Mendoza-Heisman speech, if indeed it had been Maximum Miami. All right, let's do it.

Here we go.

Wow.

Because without him, I'm not here. I'm probably stuck in the palmero trying to get to the airport. And we all know how that can be at rush hour. To my parents, gracias a por todo. You taught me that If the AC is broken, you open the window. If the door is closed, you knock louder. And if that doesn't work, you break that shit down. I want to thank Miami, not South Beach, not Windwood, not tourist Miami, the real Miami. I'm talking about Miami Huracanes, tailgate, parking lot football as a kid at the OB. I'm talking about Westchester dads yelling like their Bill Belichick at Tamiami Park. I'm talking about Kendall Rush hour traffic that builds character. You wonder how I learned toughness? I learned it from having to play dominoes against drunk deals on Nochebuena. Yeah, You know that they cheat, and you know they don't let you win. So you got to learn to be tough. I learned patience and discipline waiting for 45 minutes to go back into the pool because my abuela said that I could get una embolia if I swam too early after eating. I still don't know what that's supposed to mean.

I guess it's some mental thing.

I don't know. Una embolia. Is that an embolism? An embolism, yes.

An embolism if I swam too early after eating. To every Cuban-American kid watching right now, I want you to listen up, especially the ones trying to explain the rules of football to parents and grandparents who have no idea what they're looking at. To the kids that have to hear, Quanto? When you tell your parents just how much your equipment costs.

Quanto?

Yes, I have to buy all of this. This is for you guys. They told us to be quieter, to be smaller, to be less Miami. They said we'll never play in college football, let alone in the NFL. But no, that's not going to happen, baby.

We're loud, we're late, we're Cuban, and we're not apologizing for it.

So tonight, this Heisman isn't going in a trophy case. Dan, you know where it's going? It's going to La Carreta on Burn Road, Paso Nacasuela. Miami..

Let's go. Congratulations. That was well done.

It was weird that Mendoza thanked his teammates in retrospect.

You think? I want to, in honor of Tony here, give you a top five plays from yesterday that no one's talking about. Number five, because there are plenty to choose from here, and I'm doing this. I don't know if you guys noticed how many plays yesterday were impossibly well done with a precision that's surprising, and yet no one cares because some of these games and moments weren't as important as some of the others. In the Giants Commanders game, you got Tracy with a countdown catching it on his back. He wasn't in any way open because Bobby Wagner had him cover the entirety of the field, and it was a countdown anyway. I need the fan. Thank you. You've got in the chargers game. I don't know if you guys saw all of the catches, Herbert to Harris. I don't know how that ball was not moved as he caught it. Kaleas Campbell blocking a field goal because he's still giant. Monteric Brown for Jacksonville had the single greatest interception I've ever seen. No one cares. Full body extension caught it with the back of his elbow. What a catch. Nobody cares. No one will remember it.

It's not something that anyone is going to end up paying attention to in any way. Then, of course, in Carolina, the late hit that resulted in the Holy Guacamole. You can't lose to the Saints in that spot for the division. You saw Todd. Have you guys ever seen Todd Bulls when they lost to Atlanta, cursed like that?

That was nuts. Oh, my God. We played it on Friday. It was crazy.

While not being angry.

While he kept his same tone.

While making sure he blamed all of his players.

That was wild. But still alive, still leading in the NFC South. Kobe Parkinson's countdown, counting. That didn't make the list. What? We all have eyes. We all saw that. He was down a yard before.

That was the one where they reviewed and team Blandino was like, I don't know what that is.

I don't know what they're doing.

That was weird. Yeah.

Also It's weird, Miles Garrett, sacking that many people quietly because his team stinks and nobody cares about any of their games. He's the best pass rusher there's ever been. And what?

Better than LTE.

I mean, he's doing single-season sack stuff that no one's ever done. If you want to give it to Reggie White or Lawrence Taylor, you're welcome to do it. But I'm willing to say that Miles Garrett is the most unblockable thing that there's been in the sport. And you can argue it if you want, but he's I'm going to be in any short conversation that you're having about this.

An interesting question to me is, will he be cheated out of the Deepoy Award because his team is so awful?

Can you give me the sound again of Todd Bulls cursing while not actually angry?

What do you tell them in the locker, man.

It's inexcusable.

You don't make excuses.

You got to care enough where this shit hurts. You got to care enough where this shit hurts. It got to mean something to you. It's more than a job. It's your livelihood.

How well do you know your job? How well can you do your job? You can't sugarcoat that. It was in the fucking excusable, and there's no fucking answer for it.

There's no excuse for it. That's what you tell them in the locker. Look in the fucking mirror.

Still shocking. Greg, to your point about Miles Garrett being punished for being on a bad team. It is precedent from a long time ago, but Cortez Kennedy won Deepoy going 2-14 with the Seahawks and was even named AP MVP that season.

Yeah, no, that's fair. Maybe there is precedent, but I'm honestly wondering about that. Who are the Deepoy candidates? That's always a tougher award to pinpoint than the offensive-Jeremy, can you please give me the origins of a little bird he told me?

Some date back to William Shakespeare, some date back to Greek mythology, where they have Odin's Raven. But this can be traced back all the way to the Bible. Ecclesiastes, the original Hebrew version, which says, Curse not the king, know not in thy thought, and curse not the rich in thy bed chamber, for a bird of the air shall carry the voice, and that which hath wings shall tell the matter.

Anyway, God bless you, babe, and enjoy Chinooka.