Transcript of Patrick Mahomes is Unstoppable, Dave's Mom Has a Mike Ditka Story, Film Nerd Showdown with Marc Sessler, Points Per Game with Geoff Schwartz

A few weeks ago here on Football America, we asked if we're watching right now The Goats in the Four Major Sports. Last Friday, right after we wrapped up episode number 17, in which we debated which number 17 is ultimately better, Josh Allen or Phil Rivers. Number 17, Shoheya Thani, number 17, had maybe the greatest postseason game in baseball history. It's a football show, but we do like the other sports as well. And so we honor the greatest MLBR of all time. It is clearly Ohtani now. And we may also be guilty of turning our nose or getting distracted by other pro football players. We are looking at arguably the greatest quarterback, at least in pro football history. I hesitate to say Mahomes is the best football player ever. I don't know. Mahomes, we say Lawrence Taylor is on par with comparing Patrickois and Mariel Lemu. They're both French-Canadians who know how to skate, but that's about the extent of it. Anywho, best ever in football, goats. Even if you don't think Mahomes is the greatest QB ever, we can now all agree he's still good, and that's bad news for the rest of the AFC.

Is this really going to happen all over again with the Chiefs? All of a sudden, as much as we've tried talking ourselves out of KC, they look like the conference's best team. Hate to go back to Mahomes as Thanos, but he does feel inevitable. And just imagine if Mahomes and his pals do get back to the Super Bowl, then it'd be four in a row. And unlike the Bills in the '90s, they've actually won some of those games. So get ready, everybody. We can get distracted by Lamar Jackson and Josh Allen. But number 17, Josh Allen better steal himself deep down in places he doesn't like talking about. He knows Patrick Mahomes is inevitable. Let's start the show. Hi, hello, my fellow football Americans. Welcome to episode 18 of Football America. We have much to talk about reacting to NFL Week 7, maybe some college football, too, with our pal Jeff Schwartz. Some points per game for you and also in his debut on Football America, one of my favorite fellows in the business, Mark Sesler from Heed to Call on his way. He'll be participating in the Jerk List, maybe some movie talk as well.

In the meantime, like I say, fellows, Gino and Mike, Mike and Gino, it is episode 18. We have to honor the greatest football player to wear that jersey number. Obviously, a short discussion required here today. It's Payton Manning, right?

That's an easy one. It's got to be Payton Manning. The only one I could even I think that might be in his stratosphere is Justin Jefferson if he project his career out based on what he's done so far.

Yeah, you got to win a Super Bowl, though. So it's easily Payton Manning, even though he was a complete liability in that Super Bowl with the Broncos and Von Miller carried him to the finish line.

It's Payton Manning. We agree, Caleb Williams is not headed to the Hall of Fame. Not there yet. He wears number 18, Randall Cobb, Chaz Joyner wore the number 18 for the Chargers. He's a Hall of Famer. Here's a crazy thing about the number 18, Darryl Strawberry wore it. One of my favorite things, it's a trivia, is, in 1988, no one under the sun who watched the baseball would have believed that neither Darryl Strawberry nor Doc Gooden would make the Base Hall of Fame. And yet here we are. Hey, a guy who is in the Hall of Fame is Mike Ditka. And I just learned, before we get the sessler in shorts here, that he's 86 years young, Mike Dittga, one of the legends in pro football lore. And as it happens, I know somebody, personally, who grew up on the same block in Aliquipa, PA. That would be one Michelle Zubasik. You may know her best from my programs as Mo Damoshek. My mother, Mo, are you there?

I am here. Hi, slug.

Hello. How are you? Good. Would I'd like to say hello to Mike or Gino? And by the way, if anybody is hearing- Hi, Mike and Gino.

It's nice to see you again.

Hey, Mama Mo. Mama Mo. I like that. I do, too. It's funny that Momo, if you're hearing an echo, it's because old Mo happens to be in the room right next door to me here. She came out to watch Jean-Claude Van Damoschek and his pals win Cresby. Shout out to the Cresby South. They did. A program defining win against Saleezy in the other day. But that's not what you're here to talk about, Mo. Like I said, Mike Dittke was and is your age, and you grew up on the same block that he did, but you weren't allowed to play with him.

I was not. It wasn't a block. We lived in a commute. It was like row houses, only not charming like row houses. It was a community called Linmar in Aliquipa, Pennsylvania. Lynmore- Projects. Well, yes. They were. They were still there, still producing great football players. But Mike Dittga lived two rows down from me. We had a community playground, of course, but it's the mid-40s, 1940s. So it's a basic playground. Slides, swings, monkey bars.

But you weren't allowed to play with him? No. Why Why not?

Because one day, I was hanging from the monkey bars because what else do you do? Mike Dittga pulls down my underpants. I was not the only one. I don't know. There were other girls that he would do this to. So I go home. I'm crying. I tell my parents. As I remember, I think my father went down and talked. I think his name was Big Mike, too. Mr. Ditka, who was like, What do you want me to do? And I came home. I was not allowed to be at the playground when Mike Ditka was there. I didn't do anything. But if I was there and Mike came, I had to run back home because who knows what would go on.

It's a shame you weren't available to give Mike Ditka's Hall of Fame introductory speech. That would have been a nice tale of the town.

It would have been great. But I moved when I was 11, so we had no further interaction.

So bottom line, Happy birthday, Mike Ditka. Happy birthday, Mike Ditka.

Yes, Yeah. Okay. Who ruined my son, but- Say your goodbye to Mike and Gina. Bye, Mike and Gina. Good seeing you.

Nice to meet you. All right. What a treat. Blated. I held off on bringing this show Bringing this guy onto the show because he's one of the great delights out there. And I thought we'd get a little bit maybe of a midseason swoon, and he would boost our collective spirits. You know him as one of the heroes from Heed to Call. Before that, around the NFL for many moons. Always delightful making his pages on social media and otherwise one of the most fascinating characters, not just in sports media. Nay, walking the big blue marble, period. He's my pal. It's Mark Sesler. What's the poop, fella? How are you?

We are pals. You've lifted me up beyond, I believe, actual human acclaim. It's always a joy to be with you. You've come on our show many times, and I'm happy to join you at this moment. It's a little A bit of, as you say, a little slice of heaven.

Well, we have gone back and forth, obviously, some deep dives on the AFC North. My team remains the Pittsburgh Steelers. You've been on again, off again with the Cleveland Browns. I'd like to talk to you. About that. But before we do anything pro football related, we're obviously getting into the jerk list in just a second here as well. Gino and Mike, Mike and Gino preparing the statements that we will react to in just a moment here. Meantime, you and I have been texting back and forth, and so along with our pal Dan Hansus on the remarkable picture, probably the best picture of 2025 at minimum. One battle after another. How, say you, has it lived, Did it live up to the expectations? Haled is nothing short of the best movie of the generation. Let's start there. Does it meet that standard?

I don't know what generation we're in, but yes, because I think I mentioned to you that I have this remarkable, striking memory. I lived in Washington, DC at the time, and their train station had an incredible movie theater that was a wild movie theater. It was wild. It was just like the population would go in there and make a lot of noise. That's where I saw Pulp Fiction in 1994. That's where I saw Legends of the Fall with a Wild Girlfriend. I'll just mention that. But crazy things happen in this movie theater.

Not as wild as the woman in Legends of the Fall who shares her bed with not one, not two, but all three brothers.

She does. She's like, I'm a little innocent person that somehow because I'm out in the prairie, I can do whatever I want. We're sitting there, we're postulating that. But like... But Pulp fiction, I walked out- The kid from ET gets killed, right?

That's what it is, right?

Yeah, exactly. No, I know.

The kid from ET gets killed in the Great War. Then she reacts to that by bedding down with the beautiful Brad Pitt, pretty like a girl. Then when that gets sideways, she goes to number three, the brother with the limp, and then goes back to Pitt. Is that how it goes? I ne'er do well. A hard one.

She rolls out on a train from the East Coast with Henry Thomas, who is Elliot from ET. Then she is like, Well, the other brother who is the little creepy, he's a little creepy. He's playing a role, so he's a good actor. But he tries to woo her as almost like an adult figure. And then Pit's like, I'm on a horse. I'm Brad Pitt, so I'm so ultra. Just he's dripping. He's dripping. He's beautiful. That's when you realize, because after River runs through it, he goes and does Legends of the Fall, and Brad Pitt's like, Oh, we all understand. Even as guys, we love this guy, but women are just freaking out. And he's a beautiful, beautiful actor, and he's good. And she naturally comes to him at the end, and they have a thing where they're in like a- Oh, is that I get the brothers out of sequence, which order they went into her bed, where she went in into theirs? I think Pit came last and changed everything. Then he disappears and goes and leaves for Europe for seven years. And then he returns, literally on a horse, rampaging towards their compound.

And she's out there crying as he returns. So it's like, we get it. We get what women want. I've taken too many lovers from the same family What am I to do?

All right, what were you saying about Pulp Fiction? Because then we have to talk about Cliff Booth because Coleen Wolf was here one week ago, another mutual pal, and we had a very brief one-round Quentin Tarantino character draft, and the standard for this draft was, we have to do a different one in another day, me, you, John Gonzales and the rest.

Did she take both characters?

No, she took, and I think she aird. I said, Which Tarantino character would you most want to hang out with for a long weekend? And she took Rick Dalton, which I think is a mistake. He's a boosy drunk and maybe a good time, but the better time is Cliff Booth, right?

Well, it's a good time, but she's turning down Brad Pitt. Colleen must have a lot of options if she's turning down Brad Pitt out of pocket for... Oh, it's DiCaprio. No, I'm left with the third draft pick, which is a disaster. But I don't have a problem with her choice. I think Rick is an adventure. You don't know what's going to happen. Cliff Booth is going to take care of you.

Got that flamethrower? Yeah. He might break that out for you.

Well, he might. Well, that girl deserved it. I don't think Colleen would. But You're left with a very strange third pick after the two of them, right? Am I wrong? That's our favorite movie.

We're not just talking about Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, though. You don't just have to choose from that. You can choose any character in the Tarantino universe. Mike Fuentes, who did you take again? You had a pretty cagey choice.

No, I think... Well, my original, when we were doing this whole dance was I needed the parameters, right? Because I wasn't sure because I'm like, Hans Landa seems like an interesting guy, but I don't want to hang out with the But you're right that he's interesting. He's interesting. I don't want to hang out with him. I think I ended up picking Mr. White. Yeah, Mr. White from Reservoir Dogs.

That's not a good choice either. What do you want with murderous cretons. No. Voluntal gunmen.

That's who Mike Fuente wants to- Mr. Blonde was the ear-cutting guy, right? So I don't want him. Clearly a cycle plan.

No, that would be worse.

Mr. White had it a little put together. He just wanted you to be a professional. Yeah.

So Mr. White, you knew he would have a nail to spare for you if you wanted to smoke along with him. That's about the extent of what he had to offer in my book. Sesler, all right, it's your turn here. Go ahead, make your choice.

I really did some research on this. And also, we were filming this at a time when there was some insane Amazon-triggered internet meltdown where I I didn't research anything, too. Everyone's like they see. Christoff Walsh as Dr. King Schultz in Django Unchained, I think he's got this heart of gold. He's fire. He speaks with fire. Higher to his friends. He's willing to go against society. He's just an adventurer, and he's got knowledge, and he's a gunman. He's a wild person. When I look through all the film library of Tarantino, it's like none of us I picked a woman, by the way, which is interesting. But this is the guy I'd want to hang out with and go to a bar with. I want to swing through a tavern with two doors that whip open, the door they cut open, the old West doors. That's my dude. In Christoph Walsh, I live in Hollywood. I walk right down Hollywood Boulevard, and I walk over Christoph Walsh's star all the time, and I'm like, he deserves it. Some of these people that buy these stars, you buy them. You don't actually earn them. You buy them. He earned it.

He is a beautiful actor. And to play both characters that we named by him. That's wild, right? That's wild. And he's a very versatile, incredible actor. But I thought he had kindness. There's just something about him in that movie that changed me. And it's like, I don't think it was Tarantino's best movie, and that's okay, but one of his best characters shown through in that film.

I agree with both of the parts you just said there. Yeah, Mike Fuentes.

Go ahead. No, I mean, what is it? It has to be at least top three. Django has to be at least top three. It's like, In Glories Bastard's Pulp Fiction, Django?

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Listen, I could do this for the next few hours with you, but we have business to tend to. It's time for this week's Jerk List. Gino Fuentes, Mike Fuentes are going to read us some statements, and we will evaluate whether or not they're credible, reasonable things to say out loud after NFL Week 7, or if they're knee jerk overreactions. Also, So if we happen to mention a garden variety Jerker 3, so be it along the way. Start us off here. I'm not sure who's up first. Do you know where Mike take it away?

I think I'll take it here. Okay, we can go through the trouble of going through the regular season because gambling, fantasy football, whatever. But what we should do is just skip to the part where the Chiefs are in the Super Bowl.

Yeah. I think, Sesler, we've done our best to avoid reality, but it all of a sudden looks like the Chiefs are best team in the conference.

I love what you just said, because it's been my response to multiple seasons in a row where it's like, look, I'm going to spend... I'll be honest with the audience. I got divorced, okay? Like, football didn't play a great role in all of that. And the Chiefs are just toying with me left and right. And it's like, I'm doing all this work. I'm not available for family and friends on Mondays, Thursdays, Saturdays, if you decide to take a day for yourself, Sundays. Last week, the Chiefs played on every single day but Tuesday. So to your point, yes, they are here to disrupt and destroy, and they will be in the Super Bowl. So I completely agree.

Boy, that was a journey there. That's a splashy headline that I would expect to see at the grocery store waiting to get the bags filled up. The Chiefs ruined my marriage. I like it. I mean, I think it's- Well, it's part and parcel.

Yeah, sure.

Next up, Mike Fuentes.

Mark, are you familiar with Dave's Jenga theory?

Yes. Well, certain things can be the thing that topples everything. Yes. Correct.

So the only real Jenga piece with the 49ers through all these injuries is Christian McCaffrey.

Go ahead there.

I love to know your theory, Dave. I think so because it seems like they just survive. They're survivors to me, and it's like they're going to win 11 or 12 games. They're survivors. Do I find them thrilling? Are they the version of the Niners we've seen before? No. But it's like they DJ AF. They're just like, We're going to keep rolling. And if you get McCaffee from this past weekend, I think they survive pretty well, Dave.

I have to throw one in as far as this goes. No, I disagree with that, as I've already stated here. I think they have a ceiling on them that is lower than when they have nick Bosa in there. Even with Fred Warner out, nick Bosa, to me, is what keeps them from winning two, may three games in January to get to the Super Bowl. I just don't think that they're capable of doing that without Bosa, and certainly without Bosa and Fred Warner now. So a good team, they're going to make the playoffs. I just don't think that their destiny is a home game in Santa Clara for Super Bowl 60. I will say this, though. The thing that What really drove me crazy about Sunday Night Football was once again, for three and a half hours, we had to hear updates on, Hey, CMC and B. Jean Robinson are still pals, and they worked out in the offseason. Okay, great. Great mention. How many times over the course of the broadcast do we need to revisit that relationship? Who cares at some point? By the way, pro football, you're doing very nicely. You don't probably need my counsel.

I try to give it to you best I can to make pro football a little better than I found This thing of the Jersey Swap at the end of a game, you just played this important game for two NFC would be playoff participants. And the cutaway are CMC and Bijan trading jerseys with each other? Get a little W-W-E in you, would you? Hacksaw Jim Dugan and the Iron Sheet got arrested, burning tree and getting drunk, driving around in a car together 25 years ago. But at least they did it in the privacy of a car. They didn't do it out in the open. Do that in the bowels of the stadium. Do that out of our eyesight. We don't want to see you two playing grab ass with each other after we just spent three and a half hours hating one half of the equation. Anyway.

No, I'm with you. I've also found out that Roddy Piper had a retirement match in Pennsylvania and then quietly fought a match the next day in deep North Carolina to make more money. It's like, okay, break my sixth grade heart. Or like, Junkyard dog drove off a road in North Carolina and died or something. It's like all these people- Look how mad you made Gino and Mike.

I remember, it's the first time Hulk Hogan has slam Andre the giant. He has slammed him like six times before that. That happened like at least three times before that.

Well, you're right. That dirty giant.

I don't know. I just think we got to throw them all in one big barrel and announce this, Mike Fuentes. You're all jerks. There you go. That's for everybody there. Gino, take it away. No, they did exactly what we was expecting and hoping they'd do. Okay, so that was- That's Jamar Chase.

Exactly. That was Jamar Chase. So it's no coincidence that the word Buffalo Bill and the Pittsburgh Steelers No Ds in any of those names because they have a lack of defense, Mark.

That's what he's saying.

There's no Ds in those either. I don't know if that's a separate or- Is it a sexual reference? I I don't think that's what Gino was getting at. I don't think so, at least. Maybe he was.

But you could go that route if you wanted to.

I took it sexually, but that's probably more... That's how I am. I believe in the Steelers a little bit more than I thought I would at this point in the season, Dave. And that hurts me. It has to come always... It's like a dollar. It's like less change for the Browns, more change for the Steelers. But I believe in Pittsburgh a little bit more than I planned to. And I think they are like FU to the rest of the league. And maybe Aaron Rodgers is just a little bit better than we realized, and they might... They'll go to the playoffs. Am I wrong? I believe that that's a possibility.

Well, first of all, where the bills are concerned, I will keep saying it every time they're mentioned here, Josh Allen is hoisting all those boats, including Sean McDermott. He is outmoded. He is Don Shula for the 21st century. He is doing harm to the prime of his high-end future, his Hall of Fame bound quarterback, and he is limiting what that number 17 is capable of doing in pro football. Where the stealers are concerned, I mean, did you see Thursday Night Football? I mean, the idea that Joe Flacko is kryptonite and it's cute for Mike Tomlin, first of all, he might be the personification of the quarterback who takes down Mike Tomlin teams, which is to say mediocre and on the road. That is a bad mix for Mike Tomlin teams. And that's gone on for 18 years now during another guy who's bound for the Hall of Fame and Mike Tomlin. But I don't think it's adorable that his teams continue to struggle against these teams they shouldn't struggle against, like Joe Flacko in the Cincinnati bangles. It's a weird kryptonite to have, like Superman, as I've said many times before. This guy is made of steel.

He's faster than a speeding bullet, you understand? He can shoot lasers from his eyes. And his chief nemesis is a bald guy who's smart? Consider me unimpressed. Now, Joe Flacko is an old guy. At least he has some hair. Maybe, 2020 hindsight, Coach T may be crying about another division foe in the Cleveland Bounce trading. Joe Flacko, who, again, is an old, washed-up man to the to the bangles, shouldn't have vexed you on the level that it did, and it consumed way too much of your time. Jamal Chase seemed to be studying the game plan of the Pittsburgh Steelers, which I bring up because Cam Hayward and other high-end defenders once again announced. They explained the way what happened with people didn't understand, we had bad communication and being in the right gap and all of that. You're only pro football players making millions and millions of dollars. There's no reason that you should have figured this out by NFL week seven. You didn't figure it out last December and January. So this is extending an issue that is ongoing with Mike Tomlin's defense. And keep in mind, he handpicked these guys. He is the one saying yes or no.

This is his scheme. Don't blame the defensive coordinator, Terrell Austin. It is not his scheme. Keep in mind, Mike Tomlin is supposed to be a defensive whiz with a specialty in the secondary. These guys, Joey Porter and Darius Slay and Jalen Ramsey, handpicked to stop not just garden variety wide receivers, but Tee Higgins and Jamar Chase. And they just smoked him, again, off the right arm of an old man named Joe Flacko. I think it stinks. I don't want to get hyperbolic, but I think after 18 years, it's time. I really do think it's time. If they can't make some hay come January with the formula that he wanted to use for this season, if it does not work with some legitimate success, and I mean a win or two come the AFC play-offs, then I think it's time to move already. We've seen this show too many times on the Banks of the Three Rivers, so I'm going to say no jerk. I think that's a perfectly reasonable statement to make, and I'm sorry I had to get up on my soapbox about that.

I think we love the soapbox Bucks, didn't we, guys?

And that is Dolphins fans. No, because you're four and two, and you're complaining about your four and two team after one shock loss on a Thursday night.

The guy's never had a losing record. I'm begging.

I'm begging for them to fire that.

I'm praising them for that all the time. You're talking Mark Tomlin. They should have lost to Justin Field in the Jets in week one. This is only delayed. The fact that they survived week one only delayed this reaction for me.

Dave, in 2017, you were telling me they needed to move on from Tomlin.

This guy didn't tell you that. That's jive. Now, that's Jive. Now, hit him with the blaster for spread Jive talk. Mark Sesler is a jerk. I didn't expect that to happen today, but it did. You did it to yourself.

I didn't try to be.

Joe Philbin. Okay. Kam Cameron. All right. Who else have we had? Oh, Juan Stat. These are over the course during market. Yes, exactly.

Joe Philbin.

I forgot about Joe Philbin.

Joe Philbin. Wonstat is no fun.

Oh, my God. You know, weird Pittsburgh connection there because he rode Rogers his coattails into a head coaching job he didn't deserve. Okay, so last one for me on the jerk list. It's time for the media and Vegas to start believing that Daniel Jones and the Colts go in football games. I got them before kickoff at plus 115 money line. That's crazy. That's crazy.

Mark Sessler, you go ahead because and get that blaster ready, Mike Fuentes.

I watched them, and I thought they were a well-coached team last year with major issues player-wise. And Shane Zyken is a legit coach. And Daniel Jones was always like, if we can get this guy healthy and rolling, every NFL coach preternaturally falls in love with this person as an idea. And he's doing it again right now. And it's like, I'm in. This team is real. Now, I do think it's the team that's going to go, I've seen this before. Tell me if I'm crazy, but they're going to go 12: 00 and five and make the playoffs and lose a payoff game. And then next year, they'll be five and twelve. And it's like, what was that? Like a sea ship that floated away from us. It may be a mirage in the sense that it's not an everlasting thing, but they are tapping into something special right now with the best running back in the league and a quarterback that's having that one year. He's having that one year with a coach that's very good.

And the defense. And as somebody said, and I think it was a podcast called Football America, he was touting the defensive coordinator Lou Annarumo, before the season, saying that he was going to do what that Vic Fangio did in Philly a year ago. And then nevertheless, I feel like in the last minute or three of my life, somebody just said on the very same podcast called Football America, just said, no one in the media saw this coming. I think those were the words of Mike Fuentes. Did I hear that right? They said, The media needs to get on board with the cults, which is weird because I thought Mike Fuentes was listening before the season started. And Dave Damosheck, oh, yeah, that's That's who said the Colts were going to win the division. Where was Mike Fuentes? I am in the media. I am the media. Mike Fuentes, you're a jerk.

I'm basically a friend at this point, but I'll get it. By the way- It doesn't really count.

You better wear it.

By the way, at 12: 05 team that reaches the playoffs and loses in the first round, and then the next season, it drifts away. What does that remind me of?

Oh, man. Wow.

Doesn't that remind you of.

It exists, right? It exists, right? No, this is where we're at with the dogs. I feel like I can drive to see that. Wow, insane.

Before we wrap it up, unless, Gino, you have a gem that you want to get in here.

No, the only thing left was that Jersey Swap thing, and you stole my thunder, so we're good.

You got to jump a gun on that, so we're good to go.

I should give you one for that. Well, good. No, I had to make sure I belly-aked about that. I don't want to belly-ake about Mark Sesler's divine opinions on cinema. Let's do this one. You can only watch one person's movies for the rest of your life. Quentin Tarantino or Paul Thomas-A. Anderson. You lose the catalog of the other for the rest of time.

Boogie Nights. Oh, so it's what they've already created.

And going forward.

Okay.

There Will be Blood, Fantom Thread, Heart 8. These are great movies. These are great movies.

Are they really that rewatchable? I feel like I don't want to watch There Will Be Blood Again.

I rewatched it in the past year a couple of times. I'm with you. I'm with you. It's wonderful.

I think it's splendid. I've seen it once or twice. I think it's good. I'll rewatch Boogie Nights.

I think that was like- That's an interesting take from Mike Fuentes. You might be on the right track there.

I'll watch Boogie Nights for the final eight seconds of it. I will say one thing. It's weird, all right? Hard 8 is a really underrated early film from PTA. But if you give me the catalog, if you're saying going forward, Tarantino is like, I'm not doing anything anymore. It's like, then I'm going PTA because there may be another sea field to him. We don't know what he'll do. But I'm going Tarantino for a library. Just because I know my actual habits from today. I think he's... Pta wouldn't be PTA without Tarantino. That's that I think they're very different and they're very unusual. But Tarantino's library, I You could send me into... I don't want to live on an island by myself anyways. That feels really stupid. But is it VCR tapes? Do I have a set up? I don't know what's happening. But I just thought, Yeah, I go Tarantino. It's my natural reaction. But what's your answer? Because that's more important to me.

I think Mike is right. I think for rewatchability's sake, that's the tiebreaker with Tarantino. They're both divine. But Mark Sesler is now pondering whether or not there would be a plug in Wilson out on the desserted island to put his VCR into. Why you would use that technology? Vcr technology is curious as well, because you have to plug it in one way or the other. I think I would at least want a laser disk player, right?

I think you're right. I'd be probably gone from sun poisoning in 8-9 hours, and it's like, We don't need to watch the whole library. He gone. He gone.

That's like me getting, as I have always said, not that big a threat that I'm going to get this slowly digested over a thousand years like hand solo if you drop me in the pit, in the sarlack pit, because human beings die after 48 hours or whatever. I'm going to miss the vast majority of the slow digestion. I don't want to die. I don't want to get smothered, but I'm not going to be a part of the thousand years of digestion after a couple of days. Anyway, Mark Sesser, I could talk to you for a couple of days without break on all matters. Let's do it sooner rather than later at Mousseau and Franks, like Booth and Dalton did in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. Heed the call. Make sure you track him down. Dan Hansus, Connor Orr, the Gravedigger, all the rest of it, Dynamite stuff. You'll be smart. And you. And you soon. And me. Yeah, I've been on there before myself. Great stuff, Mark Sesler. Thanks for the time, Pally. All right, here he is, everybody, for his weekly review of what we just looked at all weekend long. It's time for Points Per Game with our pal from Jeff Schwartz, a smarter than you and all things Fox Sports.

It's Jeff Schwartz. What's happening, fella? And let me just say, picking up on what you We tweeted out at some point over the weekend, the Holy War, best seen, all red uniforms against all BIO, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. I feel like Saturday night was an all-time uniform night. How say you, Jeff Schwartz? We had SC, Notre Dame, Pit Q, Tennessee, Bama, so on and so forth.

Look, your lasting legacy in this Earth might be getting UCLA and USA to wear their home uniforms in the victory Bell game. I I think UCLA has the best uniforms in college football. I mean, that's the ultimate debate, but I think they do. You pair their uniforms with the stark contrast of different colors USA has, and it is beautiful. The Holy War is fine. It's fine. Blue and red, It's good. But the USC, UCLA game, Dave, special. Special uniform game.

That's his two shows in a row where it's come up with college football performers. Matt Liner was surprised to hear about that, and he played for USC, and he gave me his thanks, and I accepted it. Hey, Schwartz, I have a bunch of things I want to talk to you about, but very quickly, because nobody does the in between of talking college football and pro football and two distinct conversations better than you do it. Thank you. Explain this one to me. Why the half stripe on the college football? Like the pro ball is nude. It has no stripes. The pros don't need stripes. But what do the stripes That's what it's indicated in the first place? And if you need the stripe, then why isn't it all the way around? Why the half-ass thing here?

So according to the AI overview here, the stripes are for visibility, and he created position that distinguishes them from professional footballs? I guess maybe when it looks better on camera or the slow motion shots you have, do your eyes get better in the NFL? The college of the ball, their eyes are just not developed yet.

Yeah, It's like a training stripe, but I don't know what it's training exactly. And like I say, if it's needed, then do it. Go all the way.

The full stripe. The XFL, I think, has the full NFL, whatever they are. They have the full stripe around the ball, right? So that's I mean, unique. Yeah, no, the balls are different size, too, which is... Look, I made this point many times. It's very true about college football in the NFL. They're not the same sport. They are called football. Absolutely. So they use a different size ball. The field goal post and the NFL are taller than they are in college football. And the hash marks. So the field and the ball are two different sizes, and they're set up differently. They're not the same sport, Dave. Not the same thing. People confuse them too much as the same thing. That's right. Not the same thing.

There are distinctions to be made between the two. The one thing I definitely like in college football, better than pros, is that when your knee or elbow or otherwise hits, you're down. It's a weird you can get back up thing that creates awkward-looking plays. I always think about the Super Bowl 47 with the late Jacobi Jones sliding to catch the ball and then popping back up and then running into the end zone. At minimum, it looks weird. When you're down, you're down. Take the guesswork out of it.

I like that. But I think the NFL, I like the two-foot rule in the NFL versus college. That There's a difference in the sport. I think two feet down feels like you got to work a little extra harder for that catch. I saw this this weekend. I want to say, wasn't it the Indiana game I was watching, Michigan State, where if you catch a ball but in your toe and foot hits first, and then the heel hits next, it's not a catch. But it feels like that's not the spirit of what it catches. He very clearly got his foot down, the control, foot down, but then his heel hit out on the exit of the play, essentially. I don't think it's semantics of it.

I completely agree with what you're saying. If you tippito, but you're facing the sideline, if you tippito, it's a good catch. If you land on your tippito with your butt towards the sideline, then your heels inevitably are going to come down, but that shouldn't remove the fact that you tippitoed the sideline, just like you did in the other direction. All right, listen, I have a lot I want to talk to you about, as I just said there. Starting off with this one, explain the New York Jets. I mean, for real now. You laugh all you want. It ain't funny if you're a Jets fan at this point. How can you, in a capped league, suck this bad in perpetuity?

Ownership, right? I mean, it comes down to ownership, right? I've never played with a Jets. I don't know what it is about ownership, but something with ownership. They don't hire the right coaches. They don't have the right players. It's not a buy-in mentality. Look, I've been fortunate to play for the Giants. When you walk in the Giants' facility, there's four Lombardi trophies that sit there. You walk in and you feel the winning. Now, we didn't win when I was there, but you feel the need to win. Ownership is there every day. It's their job. I put other places that ownership is not there every day. That doesn't change sometimes how you feel about the team, but it was important. It is important for the Giants to win. They're there all the time. It's their baby. It's their job. I put it for the Alliance when the Giants weren't very good. You You could feel the losing. You could feel... I went for the Giants to the Alliance. You could feel... Dude, Dave, we got booed in the preseason in the Alliance on the first drive of the game when they went three out and the fans booed us.

I remember turning to someone who had been there a while and was like, Am I hearing this? I give Dan Campbell, I've said this many times, a ton of credit for breaking that stench of losing. It takes an extra special coach to do that. And then the Jets just have this stench of losing on them.

But they have why it's weird as a, for instance, what comes to mind, obviously, is Justin Fields, who I advocated for the Steelers to keep, and now people are dropping me a line like, Are you embarrassed now? No, because it wouldn't have been the same Justin Fields that you're seeing with the Jets now. And that's what I'm talking about. The same human beings change the uniform, and they stink way worse. It's inexplicable that the players who perform well across football America, if they have to put on that green hat, they become empirically worse football players.

Correct. I think that's what it has to do with, man. I think it's just structure, support. You're also the second team in the city for football. You share a stadium, which, again, it was called Giant Stadium. Now, obviously, the new stadium, it's not called giant stadium anymore. Or I guess it was called... Was it called Giant Stadium? Or everyone just called it giant stadium?

It was literally giant stadium.

Okay, literally, Giant Stadium. I'm going to say it's the deal with. The Chargers play in... It's not their home stadium. It's a Ram stadium. They're the second tenant there. The Clippers had this issue, too. They just moved to their own stadium. They were the third tenant at Staples Center. It was the Lakers, Kings, and the Clippers. I think there's all those things that matter to just the aura of your team and the Jets continue to have them. And then the last thing is the Capri pants. The Capri pants on Aaron Glenn. It's got to stop.

It's I'm not going to stop. You might be on to something because Mike McDaniel wears those, too, and things aren't going well for him. Don't ask Mike and Gino about it. They're very down in the dumps about what's going on in Miami right now. What is remarkable to me is that people, Dolphins fans, are still paying attention. Shouldn't you have turned the TV off? The Jets are a different experience. If you're still watching the Jets in the year of our Lord 2025, that's on you. Things got real sideways with these dolphins here this year. I would have expected you turn your TV TV off by then. I'm fascinated by what you say, though, about the stink in the facility. So there are discussions among your peers. This is way worse. Man, I've been on the good side, I've been in KC. This place has no chance.

I know it sounds silly, but you can just feel the difference. I'd imagine if you're playing for your Steelers, you walk in that building and the expectation is Championship or Bust. That's a firm expectation. Other teams, it's like, Oh, no. We'll see how it goes this year. Again, these are verbalized, but again, you walk on the Giants, there's four Lombardis sitting right there. I imagine you walk in to Pittsburgh. I've not been to the facility. Actually, I was in the facility once. I got a try out there once. But I imagine the six Lombardis are right there, right? They are right there. They are sitting right there. You walk in, you feel the winning. You feel like... You walk in the Jets facility, What are they going to put up? We made an Acer Championship Game banner. You know what I mean? The name of the title, I guess, is hanging out there. But it's just a different vibe. I'm not saying this is the reason you absolutely win or lose, but it takes a special coach. Rex Ryan almost did it, right? That personality he had, he almost broke through that. It does just take maybe one breakthrough.

It takes one year where you go 13 to 4 and you get to an Acer Championship game or you get to a title game, a Super Bowl, and it changes everything for you. But That, I think, is a big thing when it comes to these bad teams.

It is interesting because now I'm piecing it together and I just say, Well, they're always terrible. But of course, yeah, Bill Parcells did turn him around for a minute, and then Rex Ryan kept the ball in the air there.

There's been some times where these teams have gone close but not gone over the hurdle.

Yeah, they had a quarterback there. I don't know whatever happened to him when Rex was coaching the Jets. But now there's another AFC team that has a good quarterback. Again, four or five years ago, they had a guy named Tom braided, then they swooned a little bit, but now they're back with Drake May. How say you about these New England Patriots? How far can they take this thing right now in this AFC? Because as I keep remarking, it ain't like the AFC is that loaded up. I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, but the Chiefs are the best team, again.

I keep waiting for you to come on here and just like, brag to me about your Colts pick. You just been very low key about that. I mocked you with my face.

Mike Fuente has already caught the blaster for pretending like he's never heard anybody predict that the Colts are going to be good this year. I didn't say that. That's not what I said.

I said, The media needs to start trusting that Daniel Jones can win games. I never said, nobody said they were going to go do it because, of course, King Dave needs everybody to know he picked up.

Yeah, that's right. I want my parade. I made a prediction that nobody else made. Then people were like, Why isn't the media paying attention? Media was paying attention to it in August. I'll thank you to do the same, Mike Fuentes. You know what? Taste the Blaster again for this. I'm sorry you had to hear this, Jeff. That was ugly.

Thank you for your apology. I appreciate it. We live in a society where every time you get something wrong, people tell you about it. So you should be able to take a victory lap if you're correct about a prediction. Back to the Patriots. It's been impressive. If you were to redraft right now, 2024 quarterbacks, has he won?

I just went on Shiel Capatea's show with the Ringer, and he asked this exact same question, and I'm fascinated by the answers to this. You and I did this. And I asked Matt Liner the same thing, who's going to be the first quarterback taken in '26? But go back last year, I don't know, man. The thing with Jaden Daniels is that just because he had the exceptional rookie season and got through clean doesn't mean that his body type is made for the long term. And we saw some signs of that earlier this year. I do think Drake Mays, his body type, probably port ends the best future, right?

Yeah. The thing about Daniels, though, is that he was not ever hurt in college. I remember covering him as a true freshman, 175 pounds, Arizona Stat. That's the same thing you did. No way he survived. He's been relatively healthy till this season where he got super big. He was going to be healthy last season. I mean, Williams is getting better. But Drake May, man, look, I think the judge of these young quarterbacks is like, do they get better every quarter of the season or every couple of weeks? And Drake May feels like every single game, every quarter of the season, he's getting better. And their schedule was set up really well. Look, we joked before the season, they're favoring 11 games, like L-O-L, 11 games. What are you talking about? They play the Browns now at home. The Browns aren't winning that game. They play the Falcons at home. The Falcons have looked so much different on the road than home. The Falcons lost the Panthers by 30, then beat the commanders at home, beat the Bills at home. And then last night, what was that against the Niners? Uncompetitive on the road against San Francisco.

Disappointing in my book.

And then the Patriots are at Tampa Bay. That'll be hard. And then it's Jets, bangles, giants. And then it's Bills, Ravens, Jets. They're right in the thick of this to win that division. So, yeah, I think they're for real, Dave. I don't know how you can argue against that.

I do think now I regret not putting him into the playoffs when you and I sat down and etched out the seven teams that were going to make it. I got close with the Patriots, but just figured they were too collectively young That it was going to take a season for them to mature a little bit. And by year three with Drake May, they were going to take off.

The thing is, the rest of the AFC is just not impressive. That's part of it as well. Denver last, whatever that was yesterday, that was impressive. But I don't I mean, the Chiefs jumped them as huge as big favorites now to win the AFC West. Your Steelers feel like they're going to win that division. But the way I look at the NFL this year, Dave, is there's four teams up top that are the top of the league, right? Colts, Chiefs. I still think Buffalo is up there. I still do think Philly is in that group of teams. There's 24 teams that are 50-50 every week. I don't know what we're getting from them. Then there's the four Jets, Raiders, Titans, Dolphins that stink. That's what the NFL is right now.

I agree. And by the way, as we wrap it up, the Raiders are the one that a lot of people were getting real excited about that I did not take that. I didn't either.

I didn't buy that. The Raiders made a very flawed mistake in the draft where I have to amend my position on this. You can totally draft a running back in the first round or sign a running back, but you have to have everything in place.

That's exactly right. It's a finishing piece.

Correct. Exact way to put it. Christian McCaffrey, Saquon Barkley. It's a finishing piece. You can't start with them. The offensive line and quarterback are not good. They don't have wide receivers. Dave, they had three first downs in an NFL game yesterday. Three first downs. Sometimes you just fall into a first down. You break a tackle and you get a first down. She's got a penalty, you get a first down. Three, the entire game.

Yeah, it's grim. And just as Pete Carroll He didn't get enough credit in the age of Belichick and Saban, by age, his peers, he's also... Belichick is obscuring how bad this has gotten in Vegas for Pete Carroll because people were real excited about it when they got going there.

Last thing, they're down 21-nothing at halftime. Out of the half, they interview him as they do, because those are riveting interviews, too. And he goes, We have to run the ball better. You're down 21-nothing? Sure, run the A little bit of money.

Give it to your high-end first-round draft pick then. Maybe that'll get you in business there, Coach. All right, Jeff Schwartz, Dynamite stuff as always. Look forward to catching up with you one week from today. In the meantime, go bet on them Hoosiers, right?

Lay in 24 and a half. I'll be on them this weekend, buddy.

All right. And you know what? There goes Schwartz. Here we go, too. Thanks to him. Thanks to Mark Sesler. We'll be back at the end of the week to get you right for NFL Week 8. Until then. Thanks so much, fellow football Americans. It's been a thin slice of heaven.