Transcript of Hour 1: You Can Cut That Gas Station Tension with a Knife

This is the Dan Levatore Show with the Stugats podcast. I think that Zazlo is being horribly unfair to Bill Belichick. He has no control over what Us Weekly does. Nonsense. He doesn't have any control over that. And now I'm insisting that we get video of you booing him from the stands. You've called him the greatest hypocrite in sports, and I think the only thing he's done wrong here is get outscored in his two losses this year, 82 to 23. They are 132nd out of 134 teams in offense. They are only ahead of Western Michigan and UMass in offense because they are terrible at offense.

60 Minutes asked Bill Belichick a question on camera, and Jordan Hudson said, We're not going to talk about that. And you're telling me they can't get a cover pulled from Us Weekly?

I am telling you that, yes. There is no such thing as censorship in this country that you can control what it is that the magazines are doing. Are you sure? Not yet, anyway. They're trying, but not yet.

Now, CORE was joking around. Okay.

I have for you guys an interaction that I had yesterday, and I'm not making any of this up. This is exactly how the interaction went. There was no more to the interaction than what I'm going to tell you. It was at a gas station. Somebody pulls up next to me.

It was a whole interaction. It was just you going like this.

I'm going to go like this. I'm going to go like this. I'm going to go like this.

I'm going to go like this. No, it was not just two fingers, a windchill wiped over my head to say hello from afar, but it is what made me think about this. A person pulls up to me at a gas station. I made the mistake of pulling in accidentally into full service. I didn't know that we did that anymore. I was not even aware that full service at a gas station was still a thing. Were you guys?

I didn't think it is.

Where the hell were you?

I was on the beach.

Were you in New Jersey? I thought that's only New Jersey.

I was on 41st Street. Wait a minute. Where is full service outside of New Jersey? Because I pulled in and I thought it was a normal gas station that didn't have full service. I thought full service was extinct. I didn't think that was a thing, so I accidentally pulled into the wrong place. But this was the interaction, okay? You looked like Dan Lebitard. I do.

I get that a lot.

Thank you for getting in the way of my story and fouling up the middle of it. Then the next thing that he says is, Do I do get that a lot? I do. Then he looks me right in the face and says, I went to college with him, and I left. There was no confirmation. He left thinking that I'm not who I am and not recognizing me in any way from college.

He was Bruce Feldman.

Now, next time you know, you get one of these.

I should have just left it. Tony pointed for the audio. The two fingers.

They know what it is now. Two fingers, Rooney roll.

It Isn't that?

You said nothing to him when he's like, I went to college with him? Right.

Did you acknowledge that it's a cool thing to have gone to college with him?

That wasn't been cool. No, I didn't say anything.

How low was your gas tank? Or was it just long, awkward silences?

After I drove away, I thought to myself, I thought I thought to myself, I should have said, Was he an asshole? But I didn't. I gave him no confirmation that any of that was real.

He's a real asshole.

Well, he left confirming. He's like, Yeah, I think he was.

Now, while this was happening, were Were you sitting in your car while he's filling your gas, or you're outside with him?

I was pumping the gas because I pulled out of the full service and then moved my car to a place that was no longer full service.

Did that feel good in the sinister parts of you? We went to school together, now you're pumping my gas, pal.

No, this was not the person who was pumping the gas.

I can't believe you allowed that to happen.

That is not how that happened. You guys fouled up every part of that story. I thank you for the general support. It's why you're the best producer There's no producers in the business. That's why there's nobody who's got the producers that I do. It's why I'm grateful every day that we have this company that feeds our families. Trust us on.

The other guy was pumping his own gas, too, or that person was getting their gas pumped?

Neither one of us was getting full service. Both of us were pumping our own gas.

What car did that guy have?

It was actually a car. I don't know the model, but when he drove away, I'm like, That's an old person's car. I'm an old person. I don't know who that person was who I went to college with, but he was driving what an old person would drive. It was not a young person. Like a Buick?

What does that mean? Harry Rothwell.

No, just a big lumbering Studa Baker. He went, A-uga. When he went on the...

In fairness, people of all ages can be college students. That's going to be a college student in two weeks.

I'm glad you're fair. This is the time you've chosen to be fair, Billy. It's a good time.

Do you feel bad? When you pulled into full service, the person was probably there. Presumably, you give tips to someone that does full service.

Again, this is not an employee.

This is a person. No, I know. But I'm just saying you were there, that person- You have just people at the gas station pump your gas? I love the idea that it's just someone out there changing the trash, and they're not out there to pump gas. Dan tosses the keys. There you go. He throws the gas thing at them. Here's the hose. Fill it up, buddy. But did you feel bad? Because that person, assuming it was full service and not just someone else pumping their gas, you're like, Oh, this person must work here. Assuming that it was a full service gas station, did you feel bad? Because they saw you stop and then you're like, Never mind, I'm going to keep going, and they lost the tip or whatever, right?

I was confused and disoriented by the idea that full service still existed. That's where I was with the situation. And Every time you guys mention anything that involves tossing the keys to somebody, it makes me think of the Zack Thomas story of him standing outside of Joe's Stone Crab and somebody handing them, him, their keys because they didn't believe he was a dolphin famous They thought he was the valet from the way that he was dressed, and they just handed, they just tossed him their keys.

That car's yours in that instance, right?

That's what I'm wondering. Is it considered stealing if you then take the car? If someone gave me their car keys, they just gave me their car.

Yeah, I think so.

I think so, too.

I think that would be theft, yes.

Why would it? You didn't steal it. They gave it to you. It's called a mistake, I think, that they made.

Yeah, that they made.

Then Zack Thomas can be like, I'm a football player. I was confused.

Put it on the poll at Lebitard Show, if someone tosses you their car keys because they think you're the valet, are you stealing their car if you keep it?

If someone gives me something, how am I stealing it? Problem solved.

He just gave me the point. Isn't pointing like that, Tony, a root in some cultures? Isn't that something- With a different finger, maybe.

Yeah, with a point, you're good. But points are universal.

Put it on the poll at Lebitard Show. Is pointing at someone in some cultures considered rude? Yes or no?

All rise, the Honorable Jonathan Zaslow, now presiding with prejudice.

What are we judging here? He already gave his ruling on that.

He's going to use the hat we made.

Yeah, we made a hat.

Quiet. The judge is here.

No producers like us.

What are we judging? What are you...

Shut up and put the hat on. You look ridiculous.

I look like a judge. This is my courtroom. Shut up. We are judging whether or not it is theft.

You've already answered that question. There's no drama in this.

He didn't have the hat on. Silence.

Silence in this courtroom. I will throw you out. We are judging the case before us, which is if someone gives you keys to their car.

You've already made your ruling.

I'm so close to holding you in contempt of court. Is that considered stealing? It is not stealing with prejudice. Forgivable with prejudice.

That's not the way to do any of that. I didn't like your hat. I want to get to the Dentec bucket in a second. But before we do that, I just want to play for you guys some sound of Mike Tomlin. Mike Tomlin doesn't have a lot of fears in life, but one of the fears that he does have is a veteran quarterback. Here is some Mike Tomlin sound where he is talking about Anthony Richardson, the former Colts quarterback who will never play again for the Colts. He was taken in the first round. He had started all of 15 games when they gave him the job last year, and now that job belongs to Daniel Jones, who has one of the great nicknames in the history of sports, Indiana Jones. Here is Mike Tomlin talking about when Anthony Richardson was playing, how it is he wanted Anthony Richardson to stay in the game and no veteran quarterbacks to come in the game. A year ago, we're playing in Indianapolis, man, and I comment to the guys that keep Richardson upright, don't put Flacko in the game.

Flacko ended up in the game. I've never heard a coach just be like, That guy, we want him in there. Do not hurt that guy.

Belichick, the before-mentioned hypocrite, did say that of Freddie Mitchell in a Super Bowl. He said, Every time he was out there, I was happy. He did say that. But Tomlin saying, Please keep Anthony Richardson upright like Weekends at Bernie's, where you just keep this corpse, keep it alive, and keep it standing up. Please do not injure their quarterback. Keep Richardson upright. Don't put Flacko in the game.

Flacko ended up in the game.

So they didn't listen to him. That's insubordination.

I told you, don't hit him. What are we doing?

He's mad at T. J. Watt for sacking him. You know what could have happened? He could have gotten hurt.

Keep Richardson, upright. Don't put Flacko in the game.

And Flacko ended up in the game.

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My algorithm on Instagram is I'll dance all boobs.

Stugatz.

It's a good algorithm.

This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugatz.

Let's go ahead and go to the Dentec bucket. We are grateful for Dentec sponsorship. Bring me the mouthpieces, please. I've told you before that I endorse this product because it has helped me with my headaches in terms of grinding teeth at night and keeping your jaw in a place where it's not hurting. Because if you have this problem. Many of you do have this problem. This is something that can help with that problem. The reaper is here. Tony, why are you wrestling the reaper?

No, making sure he was holding the bucket right.

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Com. Thank you, Carmen. Let's see. Jeremy is going to go first here. We are going to be paying some penalties next week. Let's see what we have here. Jeremy, go ahead and reach in there and see what we've got. Go ahead and rumage a little bit. Let's see.

The Indianapolis Colts.

They're on the road at the Ram's. Big game. Three and a half point dog. Oh, man.

I'm going to put it back. What? Three and a half point dog? It's got to end for the colts.

I like that.

It's going to end eventually.

Live dog, Mike.

Now, Dan cursed Daniel Jones.

Anthony Richardson is going to end up in the game.

Oh, shit. I got the Panthers.

Are you a loser? I'm sorry. Carolina is on theAt New England.

Yeah, plus five and a half at New England.

Damn.

All right, here you go. First pick. The Detroit Lions.

Lions are big favorites. Big favorite against the Browns.

I'll take that.

Minus 10 and a half.

Mike Ryan, go ahead and select in there.

Got the Raiders against the bears.

They're favored by a half a point at home against the bears.

I think I'm going to take the Raiders.

I like that. Really? Why would you like I don't want to risk getting something worse.

Just listen to Vegas. You get a favorite, you keep it.

Half a point. I can't believe I got the Panthers.

I got the Broncos. They are seven and a half point favorites against the bangles. Monday night.

That's a good pull.

Very good. I'll keep it. What a terrible Monday night's late.

It's a double hero.

Two terrible games.

That's the good game.

That's the one Joe Bucks going to, I heard. We're getting the B team down here. I got the Niners. They are at home. Three and a half point favorite versus the Jags.

That's a tricky thing. Mac Jones in the vent game.

Is Purdy playing? No. He's not? I'll keep it. Screw it.

Can you get the Mac Jones' sound from yesterday? Him giggling maniacically because he threw an interception that a defender didn't have to do much of anything in order to intercept. Mac Jones with the laughter of a winner after a catastrophic mistake in a 16 of 15. A victory 3 that Tony has claimed Kyler Murray has done as a watch. I got the Jets. The Jets are three and a half point dog in that terrible Monday night game against the Dolphins. Keep it, guys. Keep it. No, I got to throw it back.

Tyron Taylor can move the ball from What's this?

No game? Oh, that's a good helmet. That's the golden helmet of life. Congratulations.

Oh, my God.

That is three straight weeks of buys. That's what I'm talking about. Yes, congratulations.

That's what I'm talking about.

Give me the swap helmet. Give me the swap helmet so I can have that for three weeks. I got the Titans. I don't think I want that for any reason.

At Houston, Houston, seven and a half.

I like the Titans there, sir. I have a point of knowledge.

Yeah, but it's not a spread.

I can't believe I have to watch that game.

I got the Texan. You upgraded. I did upgrade. Thank you.

That news for you is you have to watch the Texans.

Titans aren't a lot of fun to watch. Oh, yeah.

I got the quarterback, though. He was fun to watch.

This season, he's had a couple of throws this season. A couple of throws that I have enjoyed, but Kam Ward hasn't shown me a lot. I don't think it's great. You're not going to be able to make much of an appraisal so far of Kam Ward. He's throwing the ball an awful lot behind the line of scrimmage, like all of these guys are. How do you guys feel about that development in football? Because I don't hear or see a lot of people complaining about the way that the turnover has become such a precious thing that all quarterbacks are playing really conservative. All offenses are playing really conservative.

How much does it have to do with not wanting to turn the ball over compared to they just don't have the time that they used to have?

It's emotional.

I think, well, I know. I think It's everyone's terrified of turnovers. We've heard this for a long time in football. Every time a coach is interviewed on the sidelines, they will say, We have to win the turnover battle. And when you're talking about the... Andy Reid mentioned this during useless sound. The margins in some of these games are ridiculous. The idea that the Broncos are one and two when they could easily be three and out. You're talking about a couple of penalties. Are the difference between one and two and three and oh? The Ravens. Now, their defense has been terrible, but the Ravens are so close to being three and oh. When you're talking about these margins and you're talking about salary cap sport that makes just about everything equitable, turn Turnovers have a value that's nuts. If I were to say to you, Over the course of the last few years, I have told you that what I want, if you want to give me value somewhere, give me somebody who can get to the passer. Give Give me some things that alter games that aren't a great offensive guard. None of us here have an accurate appraisal of what the value is of an offensive guard.

But if I have someone who can either create turnovers or I have position players who consistently avoid turnovers, what's more valuable than that other than a cheap quarterback? Other than a cheap quarterback, I'll give you anything in the sport. For a while there, when Michael Lewis wrote the book about the blindside, we had a shift in the sport where everyone realized, Oh, the left tackle, pretty important. Got to protect the quarterback. Quarterback is hugely important. Let's start paying the left tackles. What are There are things you want on a football field that you think are more valuable than someone who can create turnovers? Either a defense or a player who is exceptional at getting the football back and getting your offense more chances.

The problem with turnovers, Dan, is that they're not sticky. They're random. That's the whole point of it. You have somebody that can create turnovers. We saw a couple of years ago, Trayvon Diggs have seven interceptions, and now he's stumbling out of the block, and Louther or Roma Dunzé is beating him for a 60-yard touch on. It's like, you can't rely or people can't be worried about turning the ball over either interceptions or fumbles because they happen either way. I think the defense has completely shifted where we're not seeing one safety anymore on the top of the field. We're seeing two high safeties and completely taking the top off the defense. There's no way that can stretch the field with two high safeties.

That's exactly what it is. What you're seeing is a defensive response to how offenses had the rules changed for them. They adjusted, If you want the rules changed again, that's what you're complaining about. It's not conservative. They're doing RPOs because they need to get the ball out quicker. And yes, a byproduct of RPOs means you avoid turnovers, but they can't go bombs away because there's two high safeties there now.

I suppose I am complaining about it because I want to see great offensive players be great offensive of players. Just esthetically, the revoke that there is against the push-push, when we talked about this last week, and I was saying that all the time in sports, because this is entertainment, it has little to do with the integrity of the game. They change the rules all the time in order to entertain the fans, the customer more. This development, we're not going to disagree on the fact that Patrick Mahomes has been turned into this. Nobody listening to this would say that Patrick Mahomes isn't a great quarterback, but he's been turned into something that I don't want to watch them play offense anymore. I'm bored by their football games when their football games used to be appointment viewing.

Then I would suggest to pivot on your take because you've been ringing the bell on conservative nature of offenses, and the defenses adjust, and you want the game tilted towards the offense. I actually love where the game's at now because I like seeing defenses have a shot to compete. I know the other stuff is hedonism, and a lot of people like a lot of points. I like that there's a game now to be played. It's more of a chess match, and you get to actually see athletes on both sides of the ball.

Patrick Mahomes is actually a prisoner of his own design because when he was bombs away and throwing the ball 55 yards to Tyreek Hill every two plays, they were like, Wait a second. Any time that we have one safety in the middle of the field, he's going to throw it for 65 yards in a countdown because we can't cover Tyreek Hill. So like, All right, we're just going to sit back two. Safety's good luck. You're going to try to throw something deep. So the defense is adjusted to exactly what Patrick Mahomes is doing.

How many exciting offenses in the league are there right now?

Ravens, lions. It would have made a It's not an argument for the packers just because I like Jordan Love.

Chargers aren't bad right now. Colts.

Bucs.

Bucs.

The Eagles.

The Eagles are not exciting.

I think the Eagles are exciting. I think Saquon Barkley was electric. I liked watching the Eagles last year, and I like that there was an unsoppable You're saying last year?

Yeah, no, thanks.

So far this year? He hasn't been that good this year.

They got the same personnel. What are we doing?

It's not fun watching their offense. It's just like Jalen Hertz scrambling out.

I love watching the Bills. I like where the end of it.

I like the Bills.

I like Josh Allen. I'm with you more on that than the Bills.

I don't like seeing Keion Coleman run 17 yards in a win sprint.

I mean, Jaden Daniels throws a ball deep. There's a lot of offenses there, and I think the defenses need a shot. Otherwise, we're not really playing a sport. We're playing a game that is tilted to the offense, and the game that we're actually playing who has the best offense, and your only hope as a defense is a pass rush.

That's not football. Well, Zazlo loves a defensive game, but I don't think that most people do. I think most people do want hedonism from their football. I do think that- I like trench play. Well, Tony was very frustrated by that '16, '15, '49ers, Cardinals game and the way that those two teams play. I'm frustrated by seeing Kyler Murray turned into a 15-point-a-game player. I You don't love watching Fred Warner, though?

Fred Warner, like snap to snap, is as electric a player to watch in the NFL as there is. You don't love watching the Niners play defense? I freaking love it. I think that game is a byproduct of This is what the Niners have to do to win this game without Brock Purdy. Mac Jones is limited. Mac Jones readily admits he doesn't even know the full playbook. I thought that was fun.

Why do you like the '16, '15 game and you don't like the Jacksonville, Houston 17 to 10 game? What are you doing?

Well, because Houston's offense, I think, is objectively bad. I think whatever it is, new OC, the pressure up the middle, as we often say, I just don't like the Houston games because it's so mundane. Yeah, the Texans. It's so redundant. I did not have the Texans. I hate betting the Texans because that incentivizes me to watch the Texans. I don't want to watch them. I do agree that there are some bad offenses, but that's the NFL. They're going to be better offenses and worse offenses, just like they're better defenses and worse defenses. And I like watching certain defensive... Fred Warner is one of the few players without an All-22 that I can actually watch do his job out there, and I freaking love it.

It was 16: 15. It was a miracle, by the way, because it was 6: 06 deep into the third. And I was looking at this game, and I text you down. I'm like, Send this game to the sun. Just beam it to the sun. I don't want to see anything of this game anymore. They kept going back to it on red zone, and I'm like, All right, here, third and 18 for Kyler Murray. Oh, he scrambles out. Six-yard gain. Okay.

But you get the occasion. It's not like there are an offensive explosion. For sure. But They get the Sunday night game between the Bills and the Ravens. There are plenty of good games. I think the league is really healthy. I hope they don't change the rules because I like the defense's-But what are you going to outlaw?

Too high safety?

There's nothing you can do to outlaw them. I was talking about the push-push. The reason that's going to get outlawed is because it's not esthetically pleasing, and you can't have the champions winning 19 of 20 games when 12% of their plays are rugby and not football.

How ridiculous is that story, by the way, that they said they were going to change their rule, then Jason, Kelsey came in and gave an impassion speech. I'm like, You know what? We need to keep this for Chase and Kelsey. How ridiculous is that?

Even teams that voted against it, they changed their mind.

Jason and Kelsey said, so we must have it.

The Lions heard my respect forever because they were the only team on the Eagle schedule. That's like, No, let them do it. Because That's what it was. You have a duty to your team to vote against that since they have this unstoppable play. Whatever I know, I don't necessarily think it's fair, but it gives us a better chance to win. It's also for a yard.

It's not a 60-yard play. It's a one-yard play. Okay, he gets one yard.

But it's a new set of downs.

Yeah, but if they could just turn and give it to Saquon Barkley, do the same thing, even if they outlaw it.

Don't put him in fourth and one. Don't put him in third and one. It's a One Yard play.

Do you think the front office pitches that to Dan Campbell of like, We should vote no. And he's like, Over my dead body. What do you like about a defensive game, Zaz? I find it hard to believe you a nine, six game. A couple of weeks ago, the Sunday Nighter, that was Falcons, Vikings, 22 to 6. You're like, Wow, seven field goals. This was a great game.

No, that was a bad game, the one that you just said There's a lot of bad there. But a game that's 45, 41, where every possession results in a score, that's not interesting to me, man. No, that's a bad game. That's a bad game the same way that the 9-6 game is bad, man. There's got to be a little bit of a balance. Give me a stop every now and then.

What about that Monday night or five years ago?

You hated that game?

How did you hate that game?

It's a fun little outlier for it to happen. But if the game becomes that, then we're playing NFL Blitz.

It's literally whatever team has the ball last. Why do I have to watch the whole game if whoever has the ball last is going to win?

Back games, back games. What you going to do?

What you going to do?

And then judges you.

Back games, back games. One of those classic games of all time.

It was. I love quarterbacks, but I also love Miles Garrett putting a team on his shoulders knowing how limited his offense is, and he's going to make the play. I love watching the Stealers knowing that T. J. Watt is going to touch a football and make a game-changing play.

Give me a 23, 16 game ahead of that one every time.

You guys mentioned Jason, Kelsey. Forgive my ignorance here. That late night show, How's It Doing? It was just a limited run.

It went away. It was just a couple of episodes during the postseason. I don't think it was ever designed to be a long-term thing. Maybe it comes back this season. Probably would have been a long-term thing if it performed.

It didn't really perform. It came and went. It was a cool little hack that they did and decided against you anymore.

Dan Levatard.

To us, residents.

Oh, wow. That's pretty good. It's in there.

It's better. You think I haven't been practicing?

Stugatz. I didn't realize we had a substitute complicated legacy.

Brought to you by headquarters I'm not a Toyota.

441 Power Line Road, second down of nine.

This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugatz.

The numbers that I was giving you guys on Kimmel that continue to grow, 6 million plus post 11: 30 PM Eastern on television, on linear television and more than 20 million on YouTube. Obviously, none of that is going to sustain. But I did want to talk for a second with you guys because of the duress that late night television is under and because everybody is watching this stuff differently than they used to. You guys do remember, right? Or maybe you don't. I don't believe ABC had late night television that was this.

Kimmel was the start, I think.

They had politically incorrect for a brief moment.

They had politically incorrect, which, ironically enough, was canceled for being politically incorrect. They also had Nightline. That was just a news program, which is what I associated with ABC, Ted Koppel, Late Night Television. But Jimmy Kimmel's first show, if you'll remember, he had a bar, a audience that was drinking during it, and then they stopped doing that very quickly because- Why would they do that? Yeah, they were... Well, he was coming off of The Man Show, and this was what... The evolution of Jimmy Kimmel into American martyr from Man Show and from drinking. Studio audience drinking from a free bar during the show.

That Karl Malone bit was wild. You got to see that? I have it on my phone.

23 years, late night television, more than 4,000 shows, and obviously this last one is going to be the biggest that he's ever done. It's going to resonate, but it's not going to have staying power, correct? We're all assuming that this will go back to where we were before, where late-night television is dying because everyone is telling you, No, I'll go ahead and watch things without commercials on my own time, and I won't stay up into the middle of the night and do this the the way that you want me to, not when I can do it anywhere else at my convenience. You guys believe what is going to happen here going forward? Because when we talked yesterday to Brian Stelter, we It seems obvious that this mistake this way won't be made again, where we go this directly from threat is made, and now there's a threat to freedom of speech, and now Americans, with a public outcry, are doing something that you simply don't see very much anymore. I'm watching what I think is truly horrifying video every day about how a state militia is just treating people who are peaceful protesters. I can't get consensus group outrage on that when that feels deeply un-American and it feels like it's an insult to American core principles.

But on Jimmy Kimmel, I got I got something that felt like consensus. I got something that felt like consensus when I don't believe the core principle that was being protected by Tucker Carlson and Megan Kelly and those folks was free speech absolutism. I think that our core principle there is just selfishness. Media members have microphones, and they don't want that threatened. I didn't think that that was actually the reason that everyone gathered around the core principle on that one with free speech absolutism.

I also think you also saw politicians. Ted Cruz, who did an Italian accent on a podcast, was sounding the alarm on it. You know why? Because I know what the hats say in the merch shop, but Donald Trump is up there, and this is supposed to be his final term. There are a lot of politicians that would love to be career politicians that know the American politics pendulum swings, and they don't want to be paying for the checks that Donald Trump is writing right now because they know that the response, just like Donald Trump was a response from the right to what they saw was a more radicalized movement inside the Democratic Party, and that is up for debate. But we cannot deny that it was a response with the seeds being of the Tea Party. They know this thing shifts from end-to-end, and they don't want to be on the receiving end of what is currently being dished out.

As it relates to sports and politics, Bruce Perle has just left Auburn, and he did so in a way that was interesting to me. I saw that Michael Wilbon, because many of these arguments are getting dumber and dumber, and I saw that Michael Wilbon was catching some heat, which I have not seen before when it was just something in the big finish of PTI. Big finish is just music and fast and happy, and it's just it's finger guns.

It's finger guns dance. A lot of finger guns. Oh, happy birthday to this guy.

It is. It's just like, let's conclude this punctuation in a way that's musical and dancing and happy and fun. Happy trails to Bruce Pearl, who's retiring at Auburn. And then all of a sudden, Mike Wilbon, because he calls Bruce Pearl divisive and because he says he's glad he's gone at Auburn and he hopes he was forced out, he gets turned into someone who gets dragged because he's against Bruce Pearl, and he's against Bruce Pearl because Bruce Pearl is going the Tommy Tuberville route after making a lot of money off of a black kids, and he is anti-DEI, and Mike Wilbunt called him divisive. I'm just curious what you guys thought of all of that, because the part that I actually found interesting You have to understand that these college power brokers, no matter how much we want to make them leaders and we want to make them educators, they're just salesmen and they're oily. Some of them might care about education, but most of them care about being the agents who get a percentage of a cut off of the players. The part that I thought was interesting about Bruce Pearl is you're anti-DEI, but the way that you retired, when you knew you were going to retire, you did it so that they had to take your kid because there's not time with the season coming up.

They have to do it your way. I've seen Dean Smith do that. I thought Dean Smith earned it more. And this is no knock on Bruce Pearl as a basketball coach. He's a great basketball coach, also a cheater, and also someone who lies, but he is a great basketball coach. I thought it was what?

That was just a funny... He lies. For the record- But he's a great- Also a cheater.

Also, he lies. Also, for the record, we can safely assume he is anti-DEI with how public he has been with his political statements lately, which have been amplified over the last few months. There are some people with Tuberville positioning himself for a run for governor. Some people are saying, Is Bruce Perle trying to do the same lane, the same pipeline, to politics? I struggled to find on-the-record quotes about DEI, but I've heard him say Obama was divisive. He has certainly been putting himself out there way more politically, and the timing of this is curious.

It's not curious It's just self-serving. And look, this is good fathering.

Oh, I agree with you, Dan. It works hard. It's not curious, and it's not fool anybody. It's the Tony Bennett move. You know when camps opened up for college basketball teams? This week. Tony Bennett did this exact same thing. Why? Because your university can't conduct a search. You essentially name your coach in waiting. And in this case, it just so happens to be Bruce Pearl's son. Now, let's go over this resume of Bruce Pearl's son. His son is 38 years old, who worked as a medical sales rep for years until he took up coaching in 2017. He's only ever coached under his dad. Do we think this is the best hire that Auburn can make? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. It's a Tony Bennett move. This It was a separate conversation for whatever Bruce Perle is going to do with his career afterwards. But this ain't fooling anybody, Jack.

That Jack was not necessary. Oh, it felt good.

It did feel good.

The move is a good father move if you want to get your son the cushy job. I don't know if Bruce Pearl has earned the right to do that the way that Tony Bennett and Dean Smith had. Auburn's good at basketball. Auburn's been to a couple of final fours with Bruce Pearl there.

Well, we struggled to find DEI comments. I did find something from Bruce Pearl's social media, and this, I guess, is a statement. In retweeting an awful announcing article from June 28th of Steven A. Smith speaking out for more than five minutes straight about the role nepotism played in the Lakers selection of Bronnie James. We live in a country where nepotism has taken place. Bruce Pearl retweeted with comment, Preach, Steven A.

The The idea that you would put your son in place and you would retire at 65 with timing meant specifically to make sure that your university gets strong-armed and doesn't have a choice but has to take your son. You would agree that that's good fathering, right?

It's good fathering, but honestly, why does Auburn have to go along with it? Okay, let him be the interim coach because the season is starting soon, but you're allowed to still conduct a search right now. Why can't they conduct a search? All right, they'll find a head coach and you could install him a month or two into the season, whatever.

Oh, but it's a bit chaotic. This right now is chaotic. Yes, and to do it strategically, because I don't think Bruce Pearl woke up this morning and was like, I don't want to coach anymore.

No, it's sinister. They know exactly what they're doing, and they want the ability to name who they want to name as the next head coach. It's particularly disturbing when it's your son who lacks the necessary experience to run a program such as Auburn.

What's more chaotic then? Handing the reins over to someone who is not qualified to be the head coach right now or Doing a search right now and installing a coach a month or two in.

But Pearl is staying there, though. He's going to be consultant. He's going to be around. Classic move. You don't lose the coach.

That is a perfect heist right there. You leave, but I'm not really leaving.

I'm right here.

I'm going to be here. I have this whole... Worked this out over Thanksgiving last year.

I don't think I'd call it sinister, though. If I'm calling it good fathering, I don't think I would call good fathering sinister.

Good fathering can be sinister.

It can be?

I think so.

How?

We're seeing it.

This guy fights his kids. What do you mean?

They challenge me.

You think I think he's a good father?

Sometimes.

Sinister? Sinister to just put your son in a great job, in a great position.

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