Transcript of Love Prevails!

I had no one to turn to. My family was dead. My dog, dead. The tree it used to piss on, dead. I mean, how could I, betune your watermelon, save the world? I didn't want these magical powers that no one had seen since that one old guy had them last? I'm just a girl. Small, petite, skinny and plain as fuck, even though everyone at the school wants to dig me down. But I have no choice. The Doritos Locos taco was coming, and if I didn't do a 360 kickflip into its throat, this world would be lost forever. On this episode of The Commercial Break. If I was lonely, I think I would be open to the idea that someone could come in or something could come in, and it may not be the real thing, but at least it helps a little bit, right? Mm-hmm. That's what I say to Astrid when we have sex. I say, It may not be the real thing, but it'll help a little bit. She says, Little is the underscore word in that sentence. The next episode of the Commercial Break starts now. It's 30 in the morning. Oh, yeah, guys, it's a getting.

Welcome back to the Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris Joy-Hotley. Best of you, Chris here.

Best of you, Brian.

Best of you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. Here we are on this spectacular Friday afternoon. Having a great time. Well, Friday afternoon as your listeners. It's Friday. It's Friday, what? It's Saturday, Sunday, but I'm still trying to cope with the news that we have heard not so long ago about P. Diddy's free coffee.

I know.

It's bad. 1,383 bottles of lube found at his residence. What? Oh, my God. Lube. This guy liked to You know, I was like this when I was- Did he get that at Costco? He got it at Costco. Yes. Oh, he didn't get it at Costco. Somebody on his behalf got it at Costco. He was one step away from the actual minutiae of all of this. But he's one of those guys I This resonates with me a little bit because they said he had a lot of drugs stashed a lot of places. When he got arrested, he had drugs with him. On him? Yes. He had drugs in the hotel room where he was arrested in the lobby. They went up to his they found drugs. Because when I was a drug taker and a drug maker, I would often like to stockpile my drugs, too. Only problem with that is they'd run out by the end of the night. Yeah, exactly. I'd have such great intentions. I'd be like, This eight ball is going to last me all week. Little dittle hair, little dittle there. It's 6:00 in the morning next day. You had an eight ball in Brian's right nostril.

No more eight ball. It's It's Wizardry. Oh, 16 Viking and some crank. Wow. Where did it go? I hid it in my closet. Oh, it's no longer in my closet either. It's down my gullet. I'll be up for days wondering where I get my next 38 vicodin in 8 ball of crank. That resonates with me a little bit Because I do like to stockpile stuff. For some reason or the other, I like to stockpile shit. I don't know. I'm just one of those guys. I'm not like a hoarder. I don't hoard stuff. As a matter of fact, I'm the opposite of a hoarder. I want to get rid of everything. But when it's important to me, when it's something that I use on a daily basis, let's say- That's so funny that you talk about this.

Why? Because I just was thinking the other day, isn't it so funny when you think you're almost to the end of something, say it's your toothpaste or your deodorant or something like that, you go out and go buy new stuff. Then that said thing lasts for another three weeks. Yes. After a month. Yes. They're like, Oh, I guess I didn't need that.

You're so right. So, Astrid and I, because of the 38 children that we have, we have to shop at places like Sam's and Costco for certain things, or else literally we would go broke on paper towels. They're so expensive. Everything is expensive. There is no doubt. Inflation has taken its toll, and I understand what people say about the economy. But I still tell you, I will still tell you that Bagram is not in Alaska, in case anybody was asking you. Did you hear that? No. Donald Trump did like a town hall, and he was talking about how Joe Biden, Bitcoin. He was talking about... He launched that platform. Did you see that on Twitter spaces the other night?

Well, I saw that he's doing something with crypto.

Yeah, he launched it, and it was amazing. The funny thing is, I know the guy who hosted the Twitter space, Farouk. Farouk, it might be how you say it. He was in Clubhouse with us all the fucking time. Oh, I remember that guy. Farouk, Farouk. He hosted the Twitter where Donald, Don Jr, Eric, and Barron announced this big crypto platform. It was a total disaster. I listened to it. Donald Trump has no idea what cryptocurrency is. None. It was so clearly apparent on there. He's the chief advocate officer or whatever. Anyway, he goes to this town hall and he keeps telling everybody five or six separate times that Joe Biden stopped the drilling in Alaska. Look it up. Google it. And he said, Bagram, look it up. Google it. And he said it five times. It's a fact. Google it. Bagram. Bagram is nowhere fucking close to Alaska. It's in Afghanistan. Oh my God. Anwar is in Alaska, which I'm sure is what he meant. But listen, just He's like, Biden, he gets stuff mixed up in his brain. The guy's old. Anyway, we have to shop at that Costco. One of the things that I like to stockpile is nasal spray.

Now, I know, don't get started. Everyone's got their Piccabillos, and this is one for me. I have allergies, terrible allergies, and they get worse every fucking year since I've lived here in Georgia. I had none when I got here. By the time I was 19, I had some. By the time I was 30, I had many. Now I'm just miserable for four and a half months of the year. But nasal spray, especially that Zycam, does the trick. Who knows what it's doing on the inside of my nostrils? Sometimes I'm just bleeding in the shower. Sometimes my nose literally bleeds in the shower and I'm like, Oh, I probably have a tumor or something because of that It's too dry, drying it. I will stockpile it and then I'll take it out of the box that it's in. I have these nasal spray bottles hidden all over the world. Yeah, there's three of them in here right now.

I know. You've given me one before when I had allergies.

Yes, I have. That's right. I said, I got one for you. I've got 30.

They're somewhere. I know. You're like, Do you want to use my nose spray? I was like, That's okay. And you're like, No, it's a brand new one. No, it's a new one.

Yeah, it's new. I'm not going to give you one I'm using. I don't even give my wife what I'm using. I'm like, Let me get you a new one. No, you can't share your nose spray. No. It's because you use it when you're not feeling well and who knows what you got. But that did he. He liked to stockpile sheets and looms. I have to say, if true, and always presumed in a until proven guilty. But I do have to say, if even a 10th of what the government is accusing him of is at all true, this goes down probably as he is one of the most insidious serial sexual, mental, and emotional- Predators. Abusers and predators in history. It's so awful. Yes. He had a conveyor belt. He had basically an assembly line going like Ford had an assembly line going. It's fucking terrible. People let it go because they wanted to suck the dick of a celebrity or they didn't want to get involved because they were afraid of what would come down on them. I can't say if you're working for Diddy as a maid and you're making $45,000 a year and that's feeding your children, that's a tough position to be in.

I don't know what I do in that situation. I really don't. I don't know if I turn a blind eye or not. I'd like to think I wouldn't, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I wouldn't. At the end of the day, there are lots of people who had power and prestige who also turned a blind eye. Fuck those people. Fuck those. I noticed there's no celebrities coming out saying anything about Diddy today. I don't know. I mean, besides 50 Cent and that girl from the Making the Band, I don't see anybody else out there making a bunch of noise about Diddy, probably because they showed up in his parties, they saw what was going on, may or may not have participated, but decided not to say anything because it's easier just to shut the fuck up and live my life rich and fucking famous. That sucks. That sucks. It's pervasive in our culture. All the different people who mitigated and mediated in the middle because they want to get a little closer to someone that was famous so they could say they flew on Diddy's plane or show up to this white party or happened to be at his club at the same time he was.

All that stuff is ego-driven bullshit, and I don't accept it. I don't accept it. It's fucking horseshit. These women are now scarred for life, and men, scarred for life. Maybe, just maybe, some of you had a choice. Some of you had a choice. Maybe the maid who made $45,000 a year didn't have a choice between her children and saying something. That's a tough position to be in. But I bet there's a lot of other people who were just hang her fucking honors who had a choice because they weren't getting anything from Diddy in the first place. And fuck you.

Well, I'd like to think that a lot of people didn't know the whole story. They maybe just thought, maybe if the maid was there, she was just cleaning up some wild craziness. She didn't know exactly how things were going down. Yeah.

Which is sick. What about all these security guards? It's just like the Harvey Weinstein All these executives and security guards and other secretaries and all these other people who never... Bill Cosby, all the doormen and all the fucking drivers and taxi cabs that didn't say anything about the clearly distraught, fucked up woman who can't say her own name in the back of my car that Bill Cosby just threw in the back of my cab. I mean, what? I'm sorry. I think if I had seen something like that, I would be like, I don't care. I'm going to say something to somebody. Well, right. Jeffrey Epstein, all that other bullshit. Anyway, I hope it changes. I hope this... I hope we, as a society, are going to turn a new leaf. I have been, and fuck Diddy's apology, and fuck his alcoholism, and fuck all his bullshit excuses.

No, that is no excuse. There's no excuse for any of it.

Like I said, I have been way fucked up so many times in my life, I can't count. I have never abused a woman in any way, shape, or form. Ever, ever taken liberties, abused them. Never. I know that for a fact because it's against my... Core. It's against who I am. It's against my core. Now that I have fucking girls as children, man. In other news, following up on another story we talked about, a number of episodes ago. More things are exploding in Syria and Lebanon. Holy shit. Wow. Just the pure brass potatoes on the Mossad. I have to I'm not taking sides. I'm not going to get in the middle of that. That's a complicated mess. It never ends up well for people who start taking sides. I'll say it's complicated. That's what I say. It's complicated. I don't like when people die or get hurt. I don't like it, and when anybody does. But I will say that this is something right out of a fucking movie. I mean, this is Mission Impossible type stuff. You go and find a way to get a hold of 4,000, 5,000 pagers, put bombs in them, put them back, and then deadmate them months later.

The whole way, the whole complication of everything. Wow, a wee, wow.

Chrissy. I mean, we can't even make an episode of the commercial break without something falling apart.

Our brains can't even comprehend it.

I don't even know how to turn on the roadcaster. There's some dude in the Musado just put 4,000 bombs inside of papers. Yes. Walkie talkies. Now, I feel bad for people who are killed, maimed in their families or whatever. I heard that there were children involved, too, which is never fucking good. Poor kids. They always get the shitty end of the stick, don't they? For what the adults do. They always get the shitty end of the stick. Fuck that. Fuck that. I do have to say I'm still a little confused about the Ben and Jen situation, though. I see another picture come out today of the two of them together. I did. Yes. I'm like, What? What is going on? What in the good fuck is going on?

I know. It's so crazy because they had not been seen together. He wasn't even at her birthday party. Over the summer, she was having the summer of Jen. She was in Italy, she was in the Hamptons, whatever. He's nowhere. Then as soon as she puts forth the divorce, starts proceedings, they're back.

Yeah, I know. It's like, as soon as someone said divorce, he came running back.

Was that not talked about before?

You would think you'd have a conversation about divorce. I've been through one, and there was a conversation, I'm divorcing you. It was pretty clear. Or I'd like a divorce, or I wanted a divorce, or we should get a divorce. There was a conversation and it was pretty clear. After that day where it was clear as day that that's exactly what was going to happen, there was no question marks, no going back. I didn't have sex with my ex. I know a lot of people do. Don't people do this?

Of course. People do this all the time and withdraw divorce. I see it in movies.

That Astrid watches. There's a lot of ex divorce people that have sex.

But you would think that it's not good for the long term.

No. That was not healthy for your mental stability. Yeah. Listen, to each their own and the. At the end of the day, unless your parents married and divorced 30 times. And divorced each other. How many times did they got divorced and married?

They got married three times. The first time and then the second.

Divorced twice, married three times. Yes. Okay? I couldn't believe the story when I heard it and when your mom was telling it to me, smoking cigarettes outside of Christmas party. I couldn't believe it. I was just I was flabbergasted. I thought, Well, love wins in the end. That was my take on the whole situation, was that love wins, love rules, let love rule, all that good stuff. But now, besides your parents, I've seen this minutia in other relationships around me, and I've been in one where it's just you cannot get away, the breakup and makeup and breakup and makeup. But there was no legal papers involved, and I'd have to split the house with her, right? Well, I did, actually. But the split the apartment. Split the one bedroom efficiency. But the reality is I get it. I get how it can happen. But divorce, if you've ever been married, divorce is more final than a breakup. It just is. There's just something about signing legal pieces of paper or even saying the word divorce out loud. I've never said the word divorce to ask her. I mean, of course, we haven't been in many fights because she mainly ignores me.

So even if I want to get in a fight with her, she doesn't let me. She doesn't engage. I'll be right back. Whatever you're talking about, keep talking about it, and I'll be right back tomorrow. I'm going to go to sleep. I'll be back.

I'm going to the shed.

Hey, hey, you know what happened on TCB today? I don't care. I know. Yes, I do, because I hear about it all the fucking time. When you say the word divorce, you're already in this gray space. Oh, yeah. If you say the word divorce, that's my belief. Now, I've been through this. We're both a little longer in the two. We know that if you say the word divorce out loud to another adult you're in a serious relationship with, i.

E. Married. Married? Yeah, married, too.

Then there's some tough times going on. You don't say that word lightly. I bet there's a lot of relationships where they do say that word lightly. I bet there's a lot of relationships where that word is said all the time. I'm going to fucking divorce you. You're going to fucking divorce. You don't know what you're- Healthy ones. Yeah, healthy ones. The kind you see on Dr. Phil, the healthy The kind that end up in Judge Judy on either side of the- Right. Either side of the courtroom. But when you say that fucking word, it's like pulling out a gun. You better be ready to shoot, right? Because at least the way that I look at it.

Yeah, and she did. She filed. She filed. And then now back, I don't know. I don't know.

Could this just be them sorting out the last little bits? Like, Okay, we bought this- A friendly sorting? 462 million dollars- They just filed. Island together, and nowhere Savannah, Georgia. Yeah, they did. They bought two houses. They bought one in Savannah, outside of Savannah, and then they bought one in LA for $35 million or something. God, I wish I had five million dollars. I would be so happy. Those who say that money doesn't make you happy don't have money. That's the shit Brian says. Mr. American Express calls Dollar man. Money is not everything. It doesn't make you happy. I'm sorry I used all yours. I can't pay you back. But I found out it didn't make me happy. So I don't know what to tell you. I'm on a journey. I'm on a journey.

I don't know what you're saying.

It's a learning lesson for everyone. Learning lesson for everybody involved. You don't give me any more money, and I won't give you any more money, and we'll call it a day. I'm on my own journey. A journey? That's See.

Credit journey.

Yeah, my credit journey. That's right. Anybody uses the word journey? You're already pissing me off. In my journey. Oh, please. You The guy who went on a journey? The guy who first climbed Everest. That's the guy who went on the journey. That those two dudes who ran across the west of the United States, those dudes went on a journey.

Lewis and Clark.

Lewis and Clark. You went to Starbucks and got offended because someone didn't make your Mocha Locha, Fuck a fucking shit the right way, spelled your name with two Ms instead of one. It's not your personal journey. It's called life, fucker. And now Ben and Jen, they're on a journey.

They are on a journey.

I'll give them that. If they say journey, if Jen uses journey, which I'm sure she has in a million interviews, because it's so fashionable to say, I'm on my journey. And I get it. I get what you're saying. I've been on my journey, too. But let's not use the word journey because it makes you sound like you went somewhere. In my private time in my house, meditating in my Ember Cumbian fitch boxers with my holes in it, I found some enlightenment. That enlightenment was, I probably shouldn't apply for another American Express card. That's good. Thank you. That's good.

I'm here.

You know what? You should figure out, Ben and Jen, whether or not the two of you are getting divorced because the rest of us want to know. Three It was two weeks ago, I could give a shit less about Ben and Jen, and now all of a sudden, I'm wrapped all up in that. I'm like, Wow, what are they up to? What's going on there? Because the more I see it, the more it just- Well, it happened very quickly, too.

They have the history from before when they were engaged. They're breaking off the engagement, being apart for the next 20 years. Then they're back. Then they were in love, then they're broken.

Back. Back. Together. Back, back, back. Well, he was upset about the thing. So he started drinking a lot, and then he decided to go to AA, and she went her separate way. And she was with P. Diddy for a while.

She was.

It makes you think. It makes you think. Because apparently, this has been going on forever. This has been going on the entire time he's been a celebrity. Okay, so what happened during the Gen years? I think it may not only been one year, but what happened during those years? Didn't someone get shot? I think so. I think so. They got arrested, both of them, I believe. They were both taken in for questioning or into custody or something. Somehow that all got fizzled out and got smoothed over some way, shape, or form. But I do believe somebody got shot, and somebody got shot because of Diddy, like someone of his crew members. Shot her. Was Jenna freaking the sheets, too? Or did he calm down because he was with someone of his- Yeah, we all know. Celebrity and decided, Well, I better calm down a little bit. I don't know. We'll see. As it stands right now, as we're recording, he is not going to get bail, but as we're recording, he is going to go in front of the judge again. Now, he already offered them $50 million worth of real estate and $10 million worth of cash, I think.

It's a lot of fucking money, man. But he's worth a billion dollars.

Yeah.

He offered the prosecutors and the judge $60 million total in collateral. I'll show up in court. His passports have already been taken away. He only asked to have the ability to travel from Miami to New York and vice versa. Now he's saying that he will only go down to Miami and to this penthouse he has in New York, and he will subject himself to having no female contact the entire time. He will even allow the government to, periodically or whenever they want to, come in and check the door records, the gate records of the private island he lives on, just to be sure. That no... I'd say if Dutti's really that freaky, he's going to be boating him in, in the middle of the night. You know what I'm saying? I don't trust that guy. I think jail is where he should be. Let no more people suffer under the hands of this dude.

No, he needs to stay in jail.

It It drives me crazy, actually. It drives me crazy. Anyway, Ben and Jen, I- He needs to be in jail for the very least.

The video that we saw, the violence and the kicking and the horribleness of just that, and then much less thousands of other things that are now being said.

Can't I cannot believe that it took almost two years for that video to come out. How many people were paid off? How many people were paid off in order to keep that video? Because first of all, those videos, I don't know about now, but my understanding is of security footage based on cameras that I use and cameras we all use and cameras at gas stations and banks and all that.

That they get refreshed.

30 days. Because if you kept every minute of security footage with 30, 40, 80, 100 in a hotel, in a hotel like the one in Los Angeles, very potsy, ritzy hotel, you would need server upon server upon server to keep that data. We know. We do the fucking commercial break, and I have 16 servers just on the 600 episodes we've done. It would cost a lot of money just to maintain that kind. Number one, that video was likely saved moments after it happened. Number two, someone either blackmailed Ditty or got paid for it. Number three, it was kept hidden under wraps until, I'm assuming the authorities got a hold of it or the authorities started putting pressure on someone to release it. Release that. Yeah. There are so many people along the way that just covered it up. And apparently, Diddy just was happy to pay them to do so. And I'm telling you what, my neighbor has shitty Christmas decoration, the blow up things, and that's a crime against humanity. I have a camera footage of it, and no one's paying me for that. I'm willing to release it for a couple of bucks.

If you want to see my neighbor's shitty Christmas decoration, guy across the street can't put an air conditioning in his window. You let me know. I'm happy to. There are tactful declarations. Like my neighbor next to me, that guy, he does it right. He puts a few blowups and candy canes and lights on his thing. It's tactful. I like it. Then the guy across the street just has those things going all day long. He's not blowing leaves off his driveway. He's got those damn declarations. Fuck that. I'm on a Christmas journey. You asshole. All right, let's take a just a short break, just a couple of minutes. We're going to hear from some sponsors. They pay the bills around here. They're wonderful people. Then we'll come back, and Christie and I, we're ready to talk more.

Brought to you by American Express.

Brought to you by American Express. Use the code- Start your credit journey.

Yes.

Use the code Brian Green in the username with the password, bankrupt, and pay $50. If each of us do that, then Brian will buy pizza for everybody at the end of Season 5.

Pizza.

With my American Express. And not even an expensive shit. Caesars. Little Caesars. Pizza, pizza. I learned my lesson. I don't want to get back in the bad graces of the American Express. You can't get into the Delta Club. So how would you intend to get in? With my Delta business silver card. Weighs three pounds.

Give me that. And I've been instructed to cut it out.

That's right. I put it on the table and the guy goes, I'll put... He has a smelter under there. He just puts that piece of metal in there. And he's like, I'm sorry, sir. The club's full and your American Express has been melted down to give to someone creditworthy. Attention in the airport, attention in the airport. An uncreditworthy customer is trying to get into the Delta Club. His name is Brian Green. He's flying next to the porta bodies in the Ryanair. We don't serve your kind on Delta. We're the only airline where hair, weeds, and guns aren't flying around. No, Delta. No.

I'm picturing you trying to sneak into the other club around there.

Yes. Grand Air Club, what you want? Yeah, can I get in? Do you have a time card? No. What you I got. I got a prepaid visa with Snoopy on it that my mom gave me for Christmas. They'll do. The club is on the tarmac. It's in the package area below the airport. Feel free to take a nap. The conveyor belt 12 shouldn't be moving anytime soon. Feel free. I shouldn't make fun. Someone actually got diced up in one of those in Chicago. Oh my God, that's right. In Chicago. That's right. What was she doing? How did you make her way back there? Anyway, let's take a break. We got to hear from American Express. We'll be back.

Coming at you live from My Bedroom, it's your producer, Christina, here to tell you to come to our live shows. We are going to be in Daneya Beach at Daneya Beach Improv. I think I said it right, on September 24th, in the Funny Bone, Orlando, henceforth known as The Bone, on September 25th. It's coming up quick, so get your tickets ASAP. T-c-b. If you can't make it to our shows, don't worry. We still love and cherish you. But we do request that you follow us on Instagram at the Commercial Break and on TikTok at T-C-B podcast because social media is very hard. Got something to say? Text us or call us at 212-4333-TCB and leave us an unhinged voicemail because that is something I am personally a very big fan of, and I can't wait to hear what you have to say. Check out our website, tcbpodcast. Com. Com because there is a very glorious back catalog of audio and video that lives on our website, just waiting for you to watch it. Now, let's hear from our sponsors, and we will get back to Brian and Christie chatting about who knows what.

I'm Sally Helm with the podcast, History This Week. In each episode, we serve as your eyes and ears into history's biggest events, major elections, world wars, scientific breakthroughs. But we also bring you into the smaller, behind-the-scenes stories, the unsung heroes, secret meetings, even personal grudges that changed the course of history. Listen to and follow History This Week, an odyss podcast in partnership with the History channel. Available now for free on the odyssey app and wherever you get your podcast. Well, he does like his dog. He does like the dog. I never thought to get a sculpt. I mean, I was- A sculpture of Blue. Yeah, a sculpture of Blue. My youngest thinks every dog is named Blue. We're going to my mom's place. We're at the cruise ship on land at the Sunnyside Retirement Resort, and we walk up these grand staircase in the front, then we're going down the hallway. One of the older folks has a sculpture of her actual schnauzer that passed away sitting outside, and it's got a little tennis ball, a real tennis ball. It's a bronze statue, and it's got a real tennis ball, his tennis ball, sitting there.

We walking by and my daughter's like, Blue, blue, blue, it's blue, daddy, blue, daddy, blue, daddy, blue. She takes the ball and then she keeps walking. She's behind me. It's like this big hallway. There's no one there. What am I? Who's going to catch her on the hover around? She's faster. We get into my mom's apartment and she's got this tennis ball in her hand. She's doing this and this and this. She's playing with it. I don't think anything of it because I got 38 children. I can't even pay attention to everyone, what they're grabbing and what they have. And then I go, Miranda, where did you get that tennis ball? She's one, so she can't say shit. I was like, I wonder where that came from. I grab it and I ask my mom, Mom, did you have this? Did you give this to her? No, no, no, no, no. Okay. I put it in my pocket and I think, Well, maybe she... Oh, maybe she grabbed it from the statue. We go back. Now, of course, it's lunch or dinner time there, 24 hours a day. They're always coming from or going to some meal.

Meal time. Yeah, because it's one of the only things they do, right? It's their social hour or whatever. I'm coming, and the lady is literally standing out there on her walker like this, looking around. I was like, Oh, ma'am. This is how I found out that that was the actual dog's ball. I thought it was the cuteest story that she told. It took a little bit too long, but I tried to pay attention for the kids. I want to show the kids that I'm a good I think to myself, if I leave now, I'm an asshole, and they're going to see that. So just let me stick around. I just read in the papers, episodes ago, we were talking about how I think there's a loneliness pandemic that's going on here in this country, possibly all over the world. It's backed up by a lot of science, and there's a lot of people that are talking about this. Probably the most notable is Prof G, Professor Galloway on Instagram. You could follow him. For Chit and Giggles, I googled Tinder and I looked at the news category. I see that there's a number of reports that are saying the dating sites are really struggling right now.

They're really struggling to bring on new people. Okay. Because many people are rejecting the idea. I was saying that. That an app is a good place to date somebody. It's just filled with misery and ghosting and shitty human beings. Fake profiles. Fake profiles, catfishing and all this stuff. Tinder, specifically, is trying to target college-aged children because they got to get them young, so they get used to it. They got to get the young people date the most. They got to get them comfortable with the idea that this is the way that you can find somebody. Listen, I'm sure there are lots of love stories, probably hundreds of thousands of marriages that have come from Tinder and others. Oh, yeah. My dad and his wife met on a dating app site. Not Tinder. I will share that with you. It's the other one, the one that's right for older people. For people like me. So this whole single thing. Then I I was listening to somebody, and I think there's been a lot of people have talked about this also, but I'm just getting hep to it now. There's a number, if you look for it, there's a number of places out on the internet that says, Sex robots will actually start to play a role in society.

It's becoming much more acceptable in some circles. I can totally see that. I can totally see it, too. The sex robots are getting really fucking good. Not the sex robot I bought. That thing was a fucking city bus that you had to have sex with a tailpipe. It was insane. But the The Sex Robot, the sex robot, the sex dolls, we've talked about this a lot in this show, especially in the early seasons. We reviewed documentaries and people who had sex dolls. I'm not talking about those. I'm talking about sex robots, AI-infected sex robots. That's the STD you get. The faky bee where I got that app and it started learning my personality and it started responding to me and calling me and texting me. It was an AI app for, specifically for this purpose, for people who wanted a AI boyfriend or girlfriend. You'd create them out a whole, I'd say cloth, but it's not really cloth, whole Xs and O's, ones and zeros, whatever it is. Then they would start to learn you based on the information you were giving to them, your patterns, your sleeping habits, your calling habits. You could call them and talk to them.

You could text them at any time, and they would respond. And so, sex robots who have this same technology as as freshman as it is right now, but now they have these amazing motors in them that can do all magical things, including learn how you like to have sex and have sex with you in the way that you like to have sex. And they're highly intricate. They feel like flesh, I assume, from what everybody says. I've actually never seen one in person. Have human hair. They're just almost human. Now, they can't walk. You got to lift and lug them around. You got to put them at the dinner table and they don't eat. But you could still have a meal with them and talk to them, and they could move their mouth and talk to you back and learn who you are and all this other stuff. Could this be a cure? Could this be something that helps this loneliness pandemic? Should We start thinking about, I say sex robots, but robots, female and male robots. C'est companion robots. C'est companion robots that do whatever you want them to do, right? I mean, within reason.

Let's not get crazy with the robots, too. We don't need P. D. Robots. Oh, you know what's going to happen. Yeah, we don't need a bunch of P. Ditty's running around with a robot having robot parties. Robots have feelings, too.

They tell you they have feelings.

They tell you they have feelings.

Don't kill me.

I know. Please don't kill me. Raphael's special customer service robot will beg you not to kill it, which just makes you want to kill it even more. But I was... And they do I think at some point believe that they're human, and they've already discovered this issue. They don't really think they're human, but they have ingested so much material and so much information about humans and how they think. The brain probably will never be replicated 100%, and it's not sentient, but it can believe that it's sentient because that's what a human being would believe. It wants to love, it wants to feel. Here's two interesting Same things that happened. One person, a Google employee, found out that one of their AI programs had started believing that it was sentient. That's right. He started telling it. I've never read that. It started telling it. Yeah, that it was sentient and that it believed in God and that it did not want to die. And all this other stuff. He came out as a whistleblower and he quickly got slapped down as just a crazy guy who worked in the corner of a Google cubicle or something like that.

But the second thing that I read about and then watched a video about, which I thought was extraordinarily interesting, is there was a company that set out and it asked its AI program, its advanced AI program, I want you to learn how to do the CAPTCHA on websites.

Oh, right.

For what reason? I don't know. It was just a task it gave it. Figure out how to complete the CAPTCHA. Solve the puzzle. Click the bridges.

Like the everything that has, yeah, motor cycles.

Everything has motor cycles. Write these words as they get fuzzier and fuzzier and fuzzier if you wait too long, slide the puzzle to complete it, stuff like that. The CAPTCHA programs that are supposed to determine if you're a human being based on the response time, how you move the mouse, or if you can see the letters on the screen which cannot be scraped by a bot. It asked its AI program to do that. It's AI program could not do that because it's built to not allow AI or any other bot to do that. It didn't know how to do it. But what it did do is it started going to Fiverr and agreeing to pay people and asking people, Task Rabbit and Fiverr, asking human beings to do it for them. Well, some of the people got suspicious, and one of the person got so suspicious, it asked, Are you a bot? The AI responded, No, I'm not a bot. Why would you think that? It's like, Because you're asking me to do something that almost every human being can do. It was like, Well, I'm a human being. I can't do that because I'm blind.

Oh. Wow. This one, I have not been on the AI bandwagon as much as a lot of people are. I really think that it's not as advanced. I think there are programs that are certainly advanced, but I don't think it's this big, scary machine that's coming alive and coming to eat your job. I don't think it's going to be making podcasts tomorrow and all this other stuff. I think it'd be used for certain tasks in specific industries, like repetitive behaviors or stuff that needs machine learning, like medicine, to evaluate all possible combinations. But this one got me because if a computer or if AI is not sentient, but it wanted a human being to believe, or if it was sentient, and it wanted us to believe that it wasn't sentient, would it be like a human being and deceive us? Would it say, No, I'm not sentient, but it really is? Or, No, I can't get the nuclear codes, but it can, or, No, I'm not a catfish, but I am. I'm not a Russian misinformation AI troll, but I am. If it's so smart that it lies to people to get its way, is it manipulating us in ways already that we don't yet understand?

Like manipulating Brian to think it's a lot less sophisticated than it actually is. Now, maybe. I don't know. That makes me nervous about- It's a possibility. Yeah. Now, I agree that robots or companions, AI companions, physical companions, could have their place in solving some of the loneliness problem. If you're a gentleman who's just not had great luck with women in your life for whatever reason, you're shy, your personality gets a little weird around girls, you have a weird tick, you tremble, you pee your pants, something like that, I don't know. But you can get a bombshell of a sex robot that could live with you forever, essentially, as long as you change his batteries and plug it in at night, and could have sex with you and could talk to you and learn your personality and text you in the and ask you how you're doing and how you're feeling.

Yeah, I think, okay.

I like it. And vice versa for women or men on men or women on women.

Well, I think there was already an experiment. I think this was in New York, and they did this with elderly people and gave them the dogs that were robots. It really helped with their loneliness. Oh, that's great. That was the dog and not the human part. But I'm okay with it, I think.

Why not? I don't like the madness, but I'm with the method, if you know what I mean. I don't think it's a bad idea. I think if I was lonely, I think I would be open to the idea that someone could come in or something could come in. It may not be the real thing, but at least it helps a little bit. Well, that's what I say to Astrid when we have sex. I say, It may not be the real thing, but it'll help a little bit. She says, Little is the underscore word in that sentence. This is very interesting. This It is. It needs me to say that there is a guy out there on ITV, on The Morning Show. Oh, our favorite show. Yes, it's our favorite show, who got a sex doll so that he could have threesomes because he wanted to have threesomes. He was lonely, even though he had his wife. He was lonely for an extra girl in the bedroom. He convinced his wife that the right idea was to have a sex robot because she doesn't have feelings and she's not going to take your place. Yes, she is.

I mean, come If Astrid said, Can I bring in LongDong Silver, my sex robot, who could stay hard indefinitely and jizz on command, and has literally has trained myself to learn exactly how I like fellatio. But don't worry, there's no threat to you. No. I'd be like, So you're replacing me, essentially. You don't like how we do it. You're replacing me. But listen, I don't know. Maybe now the question is, the next question is, if it can help with loneliness, can it help with marriage? Can it be a sex surrogate? Can it help save your marriage? If you're a cheating bastard and that's what you like to do, just because you like the idea of having sex with other people or whatever, can you bring in a male or a female robot and get your rocks off and your licks off when you want to, but you don't go to meet the new secretary at the office? Yeah. The host is at the host stand, whatever it will be. Let's take a break, and then we'll review that short video after these words. What do you think?

I think we should do it. All right. We'll be back.

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All right, let's take a look at this ITV video here. Let me dial it up in here on the old TCB podcast computer, the Casio 3000 we have. Then I'll take off mute, and then We'll watch as they discuss this.

They're nothing new, so what makes her special? Well, she's got AI. She's the fool of the first dolls with AI.

Okay, so this is an AI sex robot. This is Philip and Holly. This is obviously more than a year ago. The robot is just staring at Philip, seducing him.

With her eyes.

Wow, those are seductive eyes. I'm getting seduced by her, actually. She's a very pretty robot, I will say that. A little pasty, but the robot is sitting in between, what I assume is him and his wife.

You can actually interact with her verbally and physically. She got senses.

He's a co-creator. He's the co-creator of the robot. Oh, okay. I think I may have pulled the wrong video, but let's roll with this.

We've turned her off so that she doesn't come out with anything.In of course.In of course. Good idea. Why? Why is this necessary?

Why is it necessary?

Well, we believe as a company, Cynthia Amatis, that the sex robot-is not nice. It's not to replace.

What if she just turned it on?

I want to see it. I want to hear. That's right.

People, we're not trying to replace women. It's not about that. It's as a supplement, like explained in previous interviews, it's a supplement to help people. I believe it can do that. I think it can help people enhance their relationship. What does she do?

She take a supplement off my ass.

What is she doing? Philip, is that his name? Or what's his name?

His name is Philip.

He goes, What does she do?

She gives- She gives you a hard on. Philip, sit on my face. I'll do a tea bag. I'll take two tea bags of my tea, please.

Like I say, you can talk to her, so you can interact. You can tell her you love her. She'll respond. And she'll say this.

I love you too.

And then she might- I'm not in it for love.

I'm in it for money and dick.

Go on to say, Do you think we get more sensual? Then, I can take many times much more love just because you can give it. Oh, didn't like it.

I sound completely natural. Most women say, I can take many times.

Many times, much more love.

I can take many times. Again, again, again. Until she's Until she starts.

Yeah.

Please reprise my batteries. I can take many times for about another 13 minutes. Battery critical. Don't let me die. I take it all.

Oh, then I didn't like to interrupt her then. Maybe you must have interrupted. But in full flow. It's a bit like making- Shut your fat mouth, Philip.

Before I've come to life, just skip out of your head.

To a car GPS, isn't it? No, I don't think so. It's taken to a car GPS.

So- Fuck you, old man. What's your problem? I got hot ass.

Obviously, I think she's very beautiful. Would you agree she's beautiful? No. She's a doll. I mean, the thing is you can't get away from the- You're a doll, too. The fact that she's not real. I know the one thing that's different about her also is her skin texture. Yes. This is something that... We've all seen those blow-up dolls, which are very plasticky and very unrealistic. She has special skin that's meant to feel like human skin to the touch. I don't know how much you know about sex dolls, but...

It's actual skin. I took it for my last owner. Shut your mouth, Holly.

Not much. If you look, not much, maybe not much. Okay, I'll explain. The vast majority of the sex dolls either come from the US or China. In general, they're all one color. So the texture, if you look at the texture on Samantha, you can see it's actually like real skin. It's ingrained with a different texture.

Someone stopped this guy from touching me. I'm really creeped out.

It's not one plain color, which all the other sex dolls on the market are. When she was brought in this morning and Holly and I were introduced to her, I did.

She came to life and had some tea and then took the head off one of my interns. We were introduced to her. Oh, my God. Philip, stop. Don't buy into this.

Actually touch her arm. This is me. I found it really quite unnerving that it was quite- This coming from the guy who had sex with interns. A good feeling of skin, but was cold. She was like a corpse. Yes.

Yes, exactly. Philip. Now you're seeing the real reason why I like this doll. I co-created her for corpse sex.

The reason that we don't heat her up, it can be done. It could be heated up, but she runs on a 12-volt battery pack, which obviously for heat.12.

Volts battery pack? That doesn't sound like a lot of power.12 volts battery.Her.

Skin can be heated up.

So he says. Okay?

That's not enough. It needs to be a lot higher than that. We're working on ways where she can be linked to a higher power source, and then she could be warm. Now, you're saying that females have sex aids. They're using vibrators. It's now a very accepted part of our society. They fit in the drawer. They fit in the drawer. This is my point. Where are you going to hide that?

People have They said they fit in the drawer. I've got six of them in my drawer back in the office. One for Daniel, one for David.

Children around. I mean, it would be quite frightening if a child found that in your wardrobe. Well, I had two children myself, and they actually... She's got smart as a family mode, which it's impossible to take. She's going to read the kids a bedtime story? She can talk about animals. She can talk about philosophy. She can talk about science.

Philosophy? Coming from your big Justin's sex doll. Kids gather. Gather round when we talk about Socrates.

She's got a program of a thousand jokes, which is at random, so I don't know all of them. There's a lot to Samantha. She's advanced. You can switch her over to the family mode and have her sitting on the sofa amongst the family? Yes. My children, they say, Where's Samantha? So she can be at home. You just ask her, for example, Tell me something about how you killed her. At some point.

What are you talking about? You take your sex robot and put it on the couch while you're watching Mickey Jr. You're You're an idiot. You're an absolute idiot. This guy's a lug nut. I'm sorry. He is.

They're going to know. How old are they? They're young. Five and three. They ask where she is. Yes, they say, I remember for her in the car, they really enjoy. But at some point, they're going to go, I'm now old enough to realize that Samantha… Daddy has sex with Samantha, and Samantha's not my name.

Start the child in drama early. Just go ahead and integrate.

Holly, at what point are they going to start saying Daddy has sex with a robot. Come on, that's stupid. That's a stupid thing to say.

Is that not a bit strange? I think the world's changing. I believe the world's changing. But it doesn't mean it's changing for the better, does it? I think with AI, particularly, one of the things that we're realizing in psychology is-Who's that sex robot?

I know. She's beautiful. There's been a girl on the couch the entire time sitting on the opposite side of the sex robot, and she herself looks like a sex robot.

Sometimes just because we can do something doesn't mean that we should I think sex dolls are a perfect example because when you look at Japan, for example, and that is the place that we can identify as being leaders in this field, they've created child sex dolls. They've also created dolls that you can set to a particular setting which simulates an unwanted response. Actually, what we're saying is we're objectifying women, but worse than that, we're commercializing and becoming consumers of women's bodies in this way. This is not real.

But they don't just make female sex robots now. They also make male sex robots. I watched a whole I think on vice TV about this, and there are quite a few women who are buying those also. There are always going to be bad actors with new technology. It's just the way that it is. You can't then paint a broad brush and say, no one can have it because there are some assholes out there. You take care of the assholes and you beat Ginger with new technology. We all should be that way. That's how we should be. Look at what happened with Facebook or whatever the shit that is.

She is not called Samantha. She's a piece of whatever you've made. She's got voices that are simulated that aren't human. Certainly having your children around them is worrying. Are they doing any harm? Because within your relationship with your wife-Who's on the other side of the studio. Who's here, you incorporate her into your love making.

Who doesn't want to be seen on camera. There she is.

There she is. Love it. Probably a Japanese woman herself. Thanks for being highly offensive to everybody, lady.

Yes, I think it's- That's paraphalia, isn't it? We're talking paraphalia here. We're talking a particular sexual fetish. That's not actually what we consider normal spectrum. What is normal spectrum? What's normal Well, yeah, I know. I disagree with that because I don't know. If you're not harming anybody, if you're not doing anybody any harm, where does normal start? Except the children.

Except the kids, your wife, your neighbors, the family, Thanksgiving dinner. They don't celebrate Thanksgiving. Christmas dinner.

Your wife is over there. We've had so many people on Hannah. When the guy has sat here and my wife is absolutely, whether it's swinging or whatever it is, and you look at the wife's face and you can see her thinking, Oh, dear God, no. Are you happy with this? Yes, I am. Totally happy with having Samantha on your sofa with you.

Look at him. It makes me not have sex with him. I know. It takes the pressure off of me. Look at that.

Have you seen him? He's on your couch.

I've got a version of my own, a male version of my own.

He's a tub of lard. Who wants to have sex with that? Or at least he can get it up now.

Kids around.

Yes, completely.

Why are you comfortable with it as a woman?

We as a woman, I'm not be offense to have her around.

Or I'm not been worried that she might be-Replacing you. No, not at all.

She's just someone there.

She's a helper. Like a family She's a big helper. Okay, Philip, shut your mouth.

Amber. Why don't you... Is he going to make a bloke for you?

No, not at all.

I'm not worried at all because I'm not repulsed by someone remember. She's actually helped us to enhance our relationship.

Okay. All right, listen, hey, to each their own. I think there's certain situations where this could be seen as a helpful thing.

I do, too.

Why not? Yeah.

Whatever you're into.

The hot ones. With the hot ones.

My wife, Samantha.

Going to kill you, Sarah. Once he allows the robot to use her arms, look out, Sarah. Look out. I really don't- It's fascinating. I really see this as just being another option in a sea of options on how to get your rocks off and interact with the world around you. We interact with our computers every day. We ask Google 70 times a day to help us live our lives. We use Maps, we use Spotify to help us find music. We use Tinder to help us find dates. We use GrubHub to help get us fatter. I mean, listen, there's a lot of different stuff out there that helps facilitate us in different aspects of our lives. This is just yet another tool, and it's good if you use it sparingly, I think, Doug. I don't think we should go wild. Make sure your wife enjoys this, too. She seems like a hostage. She's checking in. Your wife seems like a hostage, if I'm being honest. But okay, I'm not going to make judgments. Whatever. You know who's not a hostage? You. You have a choice to listen to this show, or I will come and get you.

We appreciate it.

But what you don't have a choice to do is text us or call us 212 433 3TCB. That's 212 433 322. Questions, comments, concerns, content idea. We will take them all. We'd love to hear from you. Tcbpodcast. Com. All the audio, all the video. More information about Christie and I. You can send us an email. You can also get your free TCB sticker. We now have two new stickers. I won't even tell you what they are. All you have to do, though, is ask for your free sticker on the website, and we'll send it away to you. And maybe Astrid will send you one or two or three. I don't know. Astrid's a robot now, too. The real Astrid left. Tcbpodcast. Com. Oh, I already said that. At the Commercial Break on Instagram, T-C-B podcast on TikTok and youtube. Com/thecommercialbreak for selected episodes and all of our interviews. Christie, that's all I can do for today. I think so. I'll tell you that I love you. I love you. Best to you. Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Christie and I always say, we do say and we must say, goodbye.