Transcript of Top 10 Show Moments of 2024 - Fantasy Footballers Podcast

Look, I'm going to get the... Yeah. Get the elephant out of the way. Yeah, let's talk about what's going on here. Obviously, not quite as dressed up as I was last year. Happy Halloween.

You look a little worse than you did last year.

Well, less lipstick, for sure. Yeah. Which that can mask a lot ofImprofections? Yes.

We're a year older, you're wiser. We're grownups.

Yeah, this is... I told you we were trying order some stuff. It didn't come in. Apparently, overnight shipping is not overnight. You know what I mean? I warned you. I know. We've become a little bit laxedaisical, and I'm really sorry. If you're listening, that's fine. You don't care.

You don't lose out on anything.

But I'm sorry. We do have a great show. You can follow us on Twitter.

What is happening? Where'd the lights go?

Deucers. Hello. Hello. Do Can we have some lights here? Can we turn the lights back on?

Happy Halloween. What? What? What?

What the world was that all about? They got the power back on, and you guys look a little bit different.

Mike, we got a problem over here.

You're telling me, brother. Oh, boy, we got the costumes in.

I guess so. I guess they shipped them pretty fast.

This is one of those classic costumes.

Yeah, so Every kid, every Halloween, dresses up like me. As the blue medical tent, the hero, or at least the feature- The 2024 MVP of the season.

But my third and final my guy has been a journey, a long journey with this guy, but I think he's the seal of your draft.

Tank Bigsby. Tank Bigsby. What? Andy, tell us why How did this work?

Tank Bigsby.

It is not- The long gun. Oh, my gosh. Why is he the best value in the draft?

You son of a gun. This is not... I can't believe this worked. Yes. It is Why not?

Tank Bigsby. Wait a minute, Andy. No. Wait a minute, Andy. I have a golden ticket that says I could change your opinion here, so me. You cannot pick my my guy. All right.

Oh, you sons of a guy. The button You said something different. Yes. No, for those that are listening, everything's the same. For those that are watching on YouTube, I am in Mike's seat. Mike is in my seat for the normal ordinary reason that I knocked one of my teeth out.

Yes.

I'm just vain enough to not want to put it on display for the entire show. It's not just like a tooth hidden in the back.

You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, that's fine.

It's not even one of the bottom teeth. No. It's one of the big eyes. Metcalf, huge disappointment. People should be mad. That was the worst one I've ever done. They got different flourishes. Sure? Sure they do. I play in a fantasy league that is all ref positions, so we get points for illegal formations, we get points for illegal shit. We get all that stuff. No, no, no, no. No. What? I said illegal shift.

Yeah, that's what the tape is. Just don't rewind. That's what the tape is going to say.

What is happening to me?

Illegal shift. They've got the F letter in that word. It's doing really happy It's still lifting. All right, Nasty Boys.

Oh, no.

Oh, Andy. Oh, look at this. Oh, look at this. Oh. For the podcast listening audience, and please turn around for our live audience. This man is wearing a shirt.

I got golden ticket and I got T-shirt.

This man is wearing a shirt with Andy Holloway's face missing a tooth. Eat your dry, bland Bird. You know, I'm making a turkey this year. Really? First time in my life. From scratch? I braised it. I've plucked it. So you are in When the transformation to Jason Moore becomes a chef. You are the one making the bird. I'm a spatchcock a turkey, and I'm going to-What? You're making up words now. What was that word? Spatchcock.

I'm going to-Well, there's our hashtag.

Okay, I guess we got that one out of the way. What? Spatch cocking is-Oh, come on, man. It's a normal thing. It's just a family show, Jason. It's a It is a totally real normal bird.

It's a cooking method that involves removing a bird's backbone so it can lie flat while cooking.

Yes, I'm going to take that spine out. Hold on. I'm going to spatch cock that bird. Hold on. We have a cooking method. You remove the bird's backbone, which that makes sense.

They're like, Hey, de-spine?

No, no, no. Spatchcock. What? Who made that word? I don't know, but I think it was a 17-year-old boy. At least dispatch. Oh, dispatch? Yeah.

I wouldn't go there either. Listen, welcome in to the Maryland.

All right, let's talk Actually, sorry, real quick. I hate to cut in. I know we got a full show, but Mike, that project that you had us work on that you said to move to top priority? Yes. We got that done for you. Oh, yes. Excellent. What's happening? Oh, guys. Did you watch the Sunday Night Football game?

Atlanta? Yeah. Kansas Yeah, so halftime. This is not good. At half-time, I was so inspired by what took place at halftime. Let's go. Oh, you're talking about when Arthur blank?

After a bold self-nomination, the fantasy footballer Footballers' Ring of Honor is proud to induct the fantasy hitman, Mike Wright. I did it. I did it, everybody. The first ever fantasy footballers' Ring of Honor member. Wow. Oh, my God. I have so many people to thank. I don't know how much time I have here, As much as you need.

It's your show.

This was... So, Deucers, thank you. Andy, Jason, thank you for lifting me up to this place where I could finally achieve my dream of getting into the Ring of Honor by myself.

Incredible. You You selected yourself.

So you're the only one. Oh, yeah. I'll probably shut it down after this. But thank you guys. Your support. The fans, I could not have got here without everyone really helping. It was a team effort to get me into my Ring of Honor.

Wow. Congratulations. Can we give him a round of applause?

The people love it.

Can we give them a round of applause? Unbelievable. Wow. You were inspired by Arthur Blank himself.

Andy, why don't you talk about how much you love Kyle Pitz? Make it positive. Why don't you bring Kyle Pitz up? You love them.

Well, no, hold on.

Hold on. Wait a minute.

Hold on.

Because I seem to remember, I've got a golden ticket. I got a golden ticket.

Yeah.

You know how long I've been saving on to this for this show, baby?

I know.

Yeah. I love Kyle Pitz. Yes, you do. Let me tell you how much you do, Andy. Why don't you? Oh, no. Why don't you read the people what you think about Kyle Pitz?

It's time to come clean about something that has been bugging me for quite a while. I love Kyle Pitz, and I want the world to know it.

Nice.

Oh, okay. Because Kyle Pets is Parks and Rec.

Come on.

You got to be kidding. How did you pull this up? All right. I got a question. Before we kick it off, my question. Where is the third deucer?

Oh, yes.

Where is- Yes. Where is math? Where's the Falcon?

No. You did it. You brought it up on from this show.

Where is the third guy?

I don't know. I see an empty chair in there.

Let me count. That man has a family. Al Borland. Say something.

I'm here.

All right. And then we've got Papa Josh. No. Papa Josh. Then the Falcon.

Yeah, say something, Falcon.

Hold on, let's listen. He's not there. He's missing. No, I'm not hearing anything.

Well, my understanding, okay, is that he had lunch and coffee. And it was possible. Oh, no. It was possible he was brewing a little something.

I just haven't seen him in a while. Oh, man. And I was just- We have a note in our chat that he said, I hit both bathrooms out of spite.

So he said- He's just desecrating the building right now.

The Falcon is fully- He's questionable to return.

Starts of the week.

You know he's not starting today? No way.

Oh my gosh. Where'd he go? Are you kidding me? The Falcon has flown the poop. The Falcon has flown the poop. Speaking of diarrhea, I'm going to check in with the douche's alley. Someone's missing. Oh, no. Someone has gone missing. He just ran Guys, it's not a bit anymore. Yeah, this is a doctor is needed. Not good against tight in. I know it's shocking, but since week three, they rank 30th in schedule adjusted fantasy points, allowed two tight ends. O My goodness, what is happening? We are down a deucer in deucers alley.

The Falcon is reported.

He's here. The Falcon has-Who's clinched? Deucers be deucing, man. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? No, I'm Papa Josh is- Guys, the show is an hour long.

Poopa Josh?

Poopa Josh.

I mean, this is a one-hour podcast. We just do it every day. Deucer's alley is deucing. A, B, D. No deuce in this show right now.

It's hard to see in the shadows there, but I believe we do have a new little trophy for one of our deucers. What? That should actually- Is that a toilet? It is a toilet trophy, and it should go to Papa Josh because He is the reigning champion. He is the reigning, had to leave the show to take a dump.

That's the most recent- The most recent dump.

Get that in the camera.

Yeah, about January, he was like, I'm impervious.

Yeah, I came back from Colombia in January. Had COVID, gave it to you. Oh, not Mike.

No, Mike didn't get it.

No, no, no. He was like, Yeah, I can't even get this.

I got tattoos. I can't get shit.

Look how tough I am. Look how large- I'm What in the world was that? That was the most ill-timed thing I've ever seen in my life.

I thought we had technical difficulty opens.

Okay, so let's just walk through this. We were ripping. Oh, I was on a roll. We were ripping about mine. I had so much material ready to go. Then, apparently, I'm guessing that the deucers were all prepped with this Jay Griz thing, and they were so excited to pull out this whatever just happened.

I don't know what just happened. I'm honest.

I just unmuted his mic.

You unmuted Jay Griz's mic? Yeah.

That's what Jay Griz did.

Right in the middle of our funny So this is a Jay Griz problem?

Yeah. Jay, watch yourself. I just gave it to you.

Yeah, no. Without a rocket pack or something.

I'm Jay Griz. I'm Jay Griz.

Oh, no, he's got It's a bold prediction that I think the entire world is behind.

Yes. Yes. Footclan, prepare yourself. Dennis Allen, the head coach of the New Orleans Saints, will be fired after week five.

The biggest cheer of the night. Freedom. You don't like that guy.

This dude sucks. His persona is that he's high and mighty and that he is the brightest, shining star, and instead, he is the biggest whining excuse maker I've ever seen had a head coach. We joked about a month ago that in the footcast, I think it was, that Dennis Allen is clearly... He's driving a vet. He's got a Corvette, right? Oh, yeah. He's one of those guys driving around his vet. I looked into it. We were wrong. He drives a bus, and he drives it over his players, and he drives it over his coaching staff. Okay, every single time he is at the podium, all he does is blame everyone else. But if the Saints are good... Oh, my gosh. Oh, man. I'll shave my head. I will shave my head. We're back to this. If the Saints win 10 games, I will save my head on air.

We also have a new addition. We got it. We got a new addition to the set. Come on, Whetherman, it's the other way. Back behind Jason, we do have an official Dennis Allen thermometer. It's got 10 spots. Two of them already have Ws in it. Now, we left the camera. Now, go back to his camera.

That's right. Thank you very much. I can't put this one on, suckers.

You lost to Philly. Ten Ws for Dennis Allen and the Saints equals one shaved head. I actually thought Christmas time was just related to the news that Dennis Allen had been came. See you later, sucker. I mean, Just take the thermometer down. He's not there. Don't rip our wall. What a waste of money.

Spike. You're gone. Welcome in. Was that an updated graphic? That was a stupid updated graphic that Andy missed on the YouTube It didn't say with the producers like usual.

What did it say?

Said with the League of Record champions, and it had the picture of the champs.

Well, there's There's...

There's Al Borland. Al Borland, the king. The king is giving him the applause, Jason. The people love it. Yeah, there you go. I'm so happy for you. The people love it. He's got all the graphics ready. It's not fair when you produce produce the show and you're the champ. You get to just do... Oh, no, get it out of there.

I'm going to have to stare at that the whole thing show. Yeah, I mean, the producers got a lot of power here. The last five weeks of the season, Laporta was the tight-end No.

Spontaneous congratulations. Hey, this is Bre, Andy's wife. I wanted to give my biggest congratulations to Al Borland for winning the League of Record title. It was a close call, but you came out victorious in the end like a true champion. Congrats. Oh, babe. Absolutely wrecked it body. That was so sweet. Oh, that was so sweet of her.

Otherwise...

There we go. There we go. Hey. Spontaneous congratulations. Hey, guys, this is Caleb, Andy's son. Oh, my goodness. I just wanted to congratulate Al Borland on the amazing win and for beating my dad for a rightful victory. Yes. A win for you is a win for all of us. Oh, yes. So the waivers. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Spontaneous congratulations. This is Alyssa, Andy's favorite daughter. But I'm not here to talk about my dad. Owl, you are the greatest fantasy football champ in the world. Congrats on your victory over my dad. Oh. Thanks, sweetie. Oh, man. There's one more to go.

Mailbag. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I got one more kid.

Spontaneous congratulations.

I knew this was coming.

Hey, Al, this is Nathan, Andy's son and League of Record co-owner. I may have lost the championship to you, but to be honest, a better man won. You may not be my dad, but you're my hero. Yes. Why would he do that?

He's the one that should have rejected the fame.

Thank you so much, Nate.

Oh, my gosh. He's your dad. Do I have permission to close this out, or do you have any relatives of mine that you have summed up? My parents aren't here to walk in.

I did text your dad.

He never responded. Oh, my gosh. We're all set, man.

Probably thought you were spam.

Probably blocked you. Goodbye, everybody. Congratulations, Al. New Year's tomorrow. No show. We'll be back Thursday.

Goodbye. Thank you for listening to another episode of the fantasy footballers podcast. Join our fantasy football community on jointhefoot. Com, and follow us on Twitter @theffballers.