Transcript of Top 5 Athletes Who Don't Look Like They Have Their Profession | Postgame Show (feat. JuJu Gotti)

I think that the verbal slip that Hawkins had is a better name for Dam... Damishack. I believe we should go with changing Dave Damishack's name and his show to Dam Damishack. It has... it has more music in it. Juju is there. He is smiling. We've got an assortment of things to get to with Juju. Why are you smiling the way that you're smiling? Is it because you're so happy about what we get to talk about? Is it because you're wearing the Creamsickle Tampa Bay Bucks uniform from 1977?

Because I'm alive. You know what I mean? It's always good to wake up. But I like that Dam Damishack idea, bro. Like, you might be working with something. You might need to trademark that one before we get on air. Well, we on air, damn it. I like that Dam Damishack.

All right. Let's see what we can do about that. Let's relay that to Dam Damishack. Football America is getting bigger and badder, and people are enjoying just how weird it is. What do we have today, Juju, in terms of things that we forgot? What are some things that we did not get to today that we failed on?

Yes, sir. Well, first off, from Beale's Mafia, we would like for you to put $5 in the fine bucket for that Josh Allen never gets hurt. How he never get hurt? This brother never gets hurt, okay? Brother, knock on some wood or something. Put $5 in the bucket, please, for us.

When's the last time he missed a game? Is it 160?

He's going to double down. He's going to double down.

What's wrong with you, old man?

At least knock on wood. I mean, help my boy out.

It's just a fact! It's a statistical fact I'm not allowed to mention!

Wait, what's a perfect game? What's the statistical fact that he works?

He never gets hurt.

You know how life works.

You needed that.

That's not a stupid—

We didn't need that from you, Hawk. You know what you were doing.

I was just asking him to be honest.

You know what you were doing there. I know what you did.

Mm-hmm. First off, we forgot to mention, after the blunder that got them boys sent out to playoffs, timeout gate, Chris DeMarco, New York Liberty head coach, is not returning. Dismissed his ass. Salute. I mean, I'm not happy about it, but hey.

That laugh.

He got money in his pocket.

You sounded like you were happy about it. And you started the segment smiling. You looked happy. You sounded happy. And I think you are happy.

You're still happy.

And you're trying to hide it in a salute. You're trying to be positive, but you sound—

You can't chuckle and not be happy.

You sound like you're happy. Put it on the Paul Le Batard Show. Can you chuckle if you're unhappy?

I've seen nothing but teeth from Juju since he started talking about this topic. That's a weird way to show you're not happy, Juju. My bad, bro. He got some flowers. Also, we didn't get to Draymond Green. Almost choking Dylan Brooks out last night. Zaz, did you see that one?

Yeah. I mean, I think we didn't get to it because it's like, all right, it's a Monday, right? Who was surprised with that last night, you know?

Tuesday.

Tuesday?

So what happened on a Monday?

You know about that, Zaz?

I know about that.

You know about that Tuesday?

You know about the days of the week?

You know about that Saturday?

Juju, it made me feel a little sad, right? Like the dog lost his teeth. He drops Milowok, and then he grabs Dylan Brooks, but like, he didn't really do what he usually does. And I was like, oh, this is—

It made you sad.

Yeah, it made you sad.

It made you sad.

It's like when you see an old man fighting, it's like, dude, don't fall.

It's like, don't do this. We got— okay. All right, grab his shirt. Grab it. Okay. You feel good? All right, don't.

I liked it. I thought it was good because Draymond tackles a different player. Brooks kind of comes in, he doesn't come in with a bunch of aggression. He's just kind of like, yo. And then Draymond immediately like, just, you know what, I'm going to choke you out because you think you're me and you don't know what I went through to be me.

I'm me.

So let me just choke you out because I'm me and you're not—

You're not me. I'm me.

How do NBA players know who's tough? This is an honest question. I have no idea. In football, we know who's tough because it's a physical game. And then also, if you're on a team, you go in the locker room and they literally fist fight if there's issues. How do NBA players of opposing, like, you know, like the Morris twins, how do you know who's a tough guy and who's not? Based on what?

Josh Allen hasn't missed a game since his rookie year, 2018. He missed four games with a UCL injury. What the hell?

Now we're just—

It's a good question that Hawk is asking.

James Johnson's tough.

Well, it is reputation. Well, he's tough because he was undefeated in mixed martial arts or in kickboxing.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Right. But there are all sorts of guys, whether it's Utonis Haslam or David West or Tony Allen, like they, or Ron Artest that come from pasts where Ron Artest is willing to play basketball and lose teeth to guard you. Like, that's—

Yeah. And I can see that. And for football, most guys are willing to fight. It's a part of the sport. So it's not like you're not tough because you're willing to fight somebody. It's like you have to do that. So I'm just curious of, like, for NBA players who never actually get to fight or you see fight or it's like, Utonis, I've seen you beat somebody up, like, maybe in a locker room with a team. I'm just wondering, like, how guys get that moniker at top 5.

Well, we got cleared here. It's hard to get these rights, but we got cleared the fight between Draymond and Dylan Brooks last night. You guys can watch it here. We've got clearance for that.

Yep.

It's about what I imagined.

And they go down and it's like, oh, we don't want that.

Come on, Dre.

Just stomp him out, Draymond.

Kicked him. That was nice of the NBA.

Well, that's Dre, that fell?

Oh.

Oh.

Come on, Dre.

Oh.

Where's Milowok?

Parry.

Now steps in.

Really? I thought that was Steve Kerr who ran out on the—

No, it was the doppelganger.

He's going to kill you.

Oh, shoot.

Good on these guys for not breaking any hips in this video. I think Tan Vest won that one.

Yeah, for sure.

We didn't talk at all about that. Real quick though, Juju. When you think of basketball villains, there's no third, right? It was just the two guys in that fight. It's only Dylan Brooks and Draymond Green who are willing to accept the villain label.

That's Wemby too.

Okay.

Wemby.

Evil.

And Isaiah Stewart.

Beef stew. Yeah, Stewart.

What about the rookie out of Golden State? Axel?

Jaxo Lundberg? He's a player.

He seems like he's ready to mix it up a little bit.

He's good.

You were saying, Juju. I interrupted you. Sorry.

Yes, sir. We also didn't get to my new superstar in a questionable move, LeBron James drinking the wine of a total stranger. I don't know what the hell that was, big bro. You need to not do that no more. I want to salute to bro, but I don't know what bro got going on. And neither do you, LeBron. Put down the wine, big bro. Look at him.

It was a very small sip, a tiny, tiny sip. He was just going for funny there.

I'm going to take it a step further. I'm going to say he didn't even take a sip. I think it was a fake sip.

I don't love taking a sip of something after somebody has. But if LeBron takes a sip of my wine, I'm keeping that thing. Like, I'm like, I'm holding it up. I'm like, chugging the rest of it. I'm going to own that. That's fun. Bro say he threw the cup away. That was a cool regular brother like me. I'm saying like, bro, you just drunk out my drink, bro. I'm a little frustrated, but since you LeBron, I'm going to go give me another one. That's the energy bro was had.

Do you guys want to hear from the guy who had the cup? You guys like to hear from him? All right, let's hear from him.

So this is Troy Clemens, the man who LeBron just drank a sip of his wine, as we see right here. Troy, can you tell me what happened? Walking to my seat, you know, whatever this beverage is. We won't say what it is. LeBron crashed into me. He grabbed me. He said, my bad. My drink spilled everywhere. He took my drink from me and he basically just took a sip of it, gave it back, and ran back on the field. You know what I mean? I'm just glad for him to be here. You know, I'm not worried about the wine getting on me, you know?

How'd you feel about that? Some people were saying on Twitter that you should never wash the cup and all this kind of stuff about because LeBron drank from it. How do you feel?

I mean, at the end of the day, he ain't another man like me. And he's a regular. I mean, he's LeBron, but at the end of the day, I threw that cup in the trash. And it's nothing up with him. It's going on. It's nothing up with him. You know what I mean? I just got it frustrated though.

You know what I mean? Keep it P, man. No matter who it is, man. I don't give a damn if it's Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Huh, take your cup, bro. I don't own it no more. Salute though.

Real football guy too, because he said back on the field. So I like that from him.

I'm going to try to get my hands on that cup. I might have it tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Also, we didn't mention that.

That's all the effort you're going to put into that.

No, no, no, no, no.

You're not going to put any more effort than that. That's the max effort.

Effort's already being made.

You were saying, Juju, I'm sorry.

Yes, sir. The return of Juju Watkins has been documented. 21-5, two steals, two assists in 24 minutes of action. Little sis is back after a horrific knee injury. Back like it never left, man. Salute.

Before we get to the polls, do you have a top five list for us today, Juju?

I damn sure do, bro. Y'all was talking earlier about players who don't necessarily look like the players they are. You dig it? So it made me come up with a little top five list of athletes who don't look like they have their profession. You dig it? OLI, I'm going with Brian Fleury, the Seahawks offensive coordinator. This is an inside baseball one, but every time they put that brother on TV, I'd be like, what the hell is this drunk doing on the Seahawks sidelines? Salute.

It's a good one.

Number five? Number five, I'm going with Birdman, Birdman. That boy, hey, NBA champion. Respect on his name, Birdman. He do not look like a basketball player to me though. He looks like he could be Brian Fleury's cousin. I thought that when we seen the picture, I thought it was in reference to Fleury.

I bumped into him at a gas station in Destin, Florida. That's where he should be, not on an NBA floor.

In Destin? Number four, of course, Nikola Jokic. My boy is one of the best NBA players in the history of the world. Right there. You're looking at him.

That's spot on right there, Juju.

Number three, my new executive vice president, Jameer Nelson. That boy was the best point guard of his time to me from St. Mary's, but he looked like a damn bodybuilder, bro. Run up on him. Get done up on him. You dig? Number two, big sexy man, Bartolo Colon. Look at my boy, man. Look, run up if you want to. Big bro will strike your ass out right damn now.

He looks like a financial advisor.

I don't know why he doesn't just go bald. He looks ridiculous that way. Chris, you are waving around a cup that was clearly half the size of the plastic cup that was sipped out of by LeBron James. That is not the correct cup. You've proven nothing, and you will put forth no effort in getting that cup. Let's go ahead and update the polls at Le Batard Show. What do you have there, Juju?

Yes, sir. When I put up the polls, I put onto y'all Lamar Jackson situation. I think, and I'm going to be the first to say, because you see how Bill Simmons stole my boy Zaz's take. Why do people steal this one? Lamar Jackson, imagine him in Detroit. Imagine. Just imagine it. I just want you to sit there and imagine Lamar Jackson in Detroit because what's my boy's name in Detroit right now?

Jerry Golf.

Jerry Golf. He awesome. He's very fire, but he ain't mobile. And when you got them pieces around you, them Jet Fuels, Gibbs, Jet Fuel, Williams, Jet Fuel, La Porta, Jet Fuel, St. Brown, they get a little extra wiggle once you create a little extra time. And dare I say, Lamar can create the time, but it's neither here nor there.

He can, but I have to, wait a minute. I have to object. La Porta, not Jet Fuel. He's a lot of things.

Oh, yes, he is.

He is not Jet Fuel. He's not Jet Fuel.

I think my boy.

He's not Jet Fuel. Diesel?

87.

Definitely Diesel.

He's regular.

Oh, no.

87.

Regular gas.

Ethanol.

87 unleaded? No, I don't do that to La Porta. Now my boy at least 93 now, Petro. 93 for sure. Are there good flood coverages? 85% of the audience says, no, there is not. Do you know what King Tide is? 51% of the audience says, no, they don't. What's causing more restaurants to close? The economy or Uber Eats and DoorDash? 75% of the audience says the economy.

That's wild. That's an upset. That's an upset.

Exactly. You see my balls on the floor. I done gave it everything I got. You did. Lastly, and the most important poll, has anyone other than Andrew Hawkins ended their career in football with a negative 14 yard catch?

It's got to be a record.

It's hard to look up, I tried.

No, but it has to be a record. I'm telling you, there's simply no one in the history of football who says my career ended with more lost yards than a 14-yard loss.

Joe Jerevicius is like, I had negative 17.

On a reception. 94% of the audience says no, and those are your polls. Bye-bye.