Welcome to the Big Suey, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast. I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it. And now, here's the marching band to nowhere, Fatface and the Pitchou a Liar. This episode of the Dan Levatard Show is presented by DraftKings. Draftkings, the Crown is yours. Brian Windhorse has been saying a form of this for a while, but now he's just saying it flatly that the Lakers are going to ask LeBron to take a pay cut, potentially a significant one for next season. Last night, LeBron was crying during his return to Cleveland. Crocodile tears. Really? You guys don't think any of that was sincere last night? You thought that that was all optics? You all are bringing your cynicism to this? Major crocodile tears, Dan.
Dan, thank goodness there just so happened to be a box of tissues underneath his seat on the bench because that's common place, right?
Thank goodness there was a box of tissues for him to wipe away the tears he knew he was going to have. Okay. I mean, we have a box of tissues here because South Beach Sessions could get vulnerable, and we always have it here in the event that anybody needs some tissues. You love that move. Which move do you think I have? Passing the tissue to the guest. That's such a great interviewer move. Here, take these. I don't love that move. You do. My Christians are so great. You do. We happen to have tissues there. We've gotten good at the move because there are so many tears on South Beach. When you bite the lip, too, as you do it. You guys love to be cynical about vulnerability. You guys love to criticize when people cry. Why is he crying? I imagine it's a combination of age, appreciation that you don't have at the time that you're young when you look back at things and memories and you're at the end of your career and whatever it is your identity was at the top of this sport. My guess is that memories... Greg Coat has been crying more at '71 than I've ever seen in his life.
He does acknowledge in postgame. He won't say it. Definitely, he's like, This might be my last time. But LeBron is in the portion of his career that Greg is in the portion of his life. He's about to bury the person that he has been for the last 20 some odd years. But he's been warmly received consistently in Cleveland since he won them that title. It's not like... I don't know if the novelty of my first time back here after leaving this franchise, they threw batteries at me, and now I'm being cheered. I don't know if that novelty ever wears off, but I got to imagine it gets diluted because he's done it a lot. It's also LeBron. He could get traded to a team that he feels better on, and then he goes and plays Cleveland four more times the next year. Okay, but this part- I don't know what that team could be. This part is, to me, always interesting. Kobe used to say that the one that mattered to him the most is the one that he got without Shaq because he proved it to himself. Lebron getting the Championship in Cleveland, very few people...
That's the best moment of his career and life, and there will be nothing like that. And Crocodile Crocodile Tears, when you mention it, Zaz, it reminds me, Stugats patented not knowing what Crocodile Tears were. I'm telling you guys, you were on stage. Dan and I were both crying. Crocodile tears. Crocodile tears are faked. Crocodile tears are faked. I thought they meant big. David Samson is with us now. He's always good for cynicism in all circumstances. So I would assume, I would just guess off the top of my head, even though you've been more emotional lately than I've ever seen you that you think that LeBron's tears were crocodile tears. What say you?
Oh, I think they were actual. I think when it's the end of an era, you know it. He knows it. He knows he's done, his team's done, and he knows that he is no longer where he was. And that, of course, is when the tears come. He is already starting to reflect on what was the second greatest career in the National Basketball Association's history. So I would expect there to be more tears. Cleveland would be the most, but when he comes back to Miami, if he would actually play, that would count or any place he's been, you take a last look. I'm familiar with last looks, and they're tough.
So you believe it was sincere. You don't believe what Zaz is saying, Tissues under your chair, crocodile tears, get out of here?
Yeah, there's tissues all over the place. I've got tissues here. I mean, some of the medicine I take causes a stuffy nose, but there's only a few people who will laugh at that, and they're old. But yeah, there are tissues in various places around the bench. That's very normal, Zaz.
I don't think it is normal. And on top of it, LeBron is wiping the tears with his jersey. Why does he then also need the tissues? Did he just wipe his tears with his jersey?
Yeah, but you can only reach a certain point on your jersey, then it's too wet and not impactful.
The game hadn't started. This is the most performative athlete of our generation. He does a lot of things for optics. He's leaning into the moment. It's a little extra. Okay, but you guys, man. He's going to He's going to get emotional next year. I'm the bad guy. Are we going to get emotional next year, too, or is this the Cleveland emotional moment? Can we not imagine that going there closer to the end of his career, playing with Bronnie, making sure he sits-Late there with Bronnie before. I understand That's not the man's sake. This is closer to the end of his career, and he knows that it might be the end of his career with the Lakers, as we just saw that Windhorse report that says take a pay cut. He doesn't know what he's going to do. There was a report yesterday, I think it was Dave McManaman that said LeBron doesn't want to do the pressure fulfilled retirement tour because he knows he doesn't want to play every single game. That is a crock. He says he doesn't want to play every single game of a season, and so in turn, he's going to disappoint fan bases.
Maybe he doesn't want to weigh that. This might be the last time he plays in Cleveland, and he got to do it with his kid. I think that that might be worthy of a tier. I don't know if it's sniveling or lamenting or choking back tears, or is it dusty in here, but it's somewhere on the tier of tears. Okay, we'll get to- I'm going to go ahead and say it's not the last time he plays in Cleveland. We'll get to the tier of tears in a second, but I I'd like for you, cynics, to just do this as a thought exercise with me, okay? Let's just say for the purposes of discussion that LeBron James knows that his tears were 100% sincere. Do you understand why it is that someone in that circumstance after the last two decades of his career would think the media and critics are such assholes that after having what was a sincere moment, you guys are deconstructing whether the tissues are real or not. As an experience of the last 20 years of media, do you understand how he arrives at, I don't care what articles are written. I don't care what anyone has to say about anything because you guys have been talking about everything I do for 20 years, living vicariously through me, criticizing everything I do, and I'm still better at what I do than any of you are at anything you've ever done.
Yeah, but we don't do this for every athlete. Have you not followed this guy? Maybe part of it is that he's not sincere. It's this whole It's become a joke on social media for 20 years, how insincere and how performative it is. If Steph Curry was in a moment like this, I'd be like, Okay, we would buy it. We would totally buy it. Maybe, but I would say that there's such cynicism now around sports, fandom and the customer, and everything has become so poisoned that maybe you'd do that. But when Brett Farve did that, before any of the Brett Farve stuff happened, I remember the conversation here where he's weeping in front of his locker and you guys You guys buried him. You guys just buried- Was that before or after he threatened retirement three times and then came back for several different teams? I guess sometimes cynicism is right. I understand your perspective. Actually, I don't, because you're hardlining believe him. And I'm not hardlining cynicism. I'm saying there are performative aspects to this. Yes, it's touching. They had elevator signs all around the locker room like, Welcome back home, Brawny, and Brawny's a little kid, and LeBron in arguably his greatest professional moment ever.
Yeah, that stuff hits you in the feels, but it's when the camera's on, famously. Yeah, but you're performative, too, and you're also aging. If I put a moment with you and your daughter in front of people at the end of what we know is the end of this, and you were crying, and people would say, You know what? He's a performer. I don't believe that. He's acting. It's a bit. That's Mike Ryan. That's bullshit. That's not real. Those feelings aren't real. Okay. I also didn't crush- The David Samson. I was eight years old. I would not show my daughter on camera.
Mike, you will definitely cry when this run is over. You've had an amazing run with Dan, and whenever that time comes, whether it's in five minutes or 20 years, you will definitely cry.
Yeah, no doubt. And you will know when it's the end. I'm not going to cry now because it's not the end, despite what read it, Mike. Thank God.
There are moments, Mike, where you don't exactly know when the end is, and you don't get to... Not everybody gets to plan their end. Sometimes the end is thrust upon them. When you release a player who's not ready to stop playing, that becomes the end, or they wait until nobody will sign them, and then they try to play in Korea. So there's a whole lot of things that can happen to delay, but you can have an interim and cry, and that can be totally legitimate.
So LeBron evidently says that he does not want a retirement tour, and I guess I will give this to you guys late. Yo, chicken thon.
Clearly just waiting for the camera to be in front of the camera. Not only is he going to have a retirement tour, he's going to have a retirement multi-year tour.
He'll announce it several years in advance. What if he plays for the heat? He's going to play Cleveland. Last game in Cleveland.
He'll play 41 games at home for them next year. I'm going to be totally okay. Last time here. He got me my plate for heat. He could do whatever he wanted. Big O'Call, Zazlo cuckled.
China. Big ass head. Samson, the thing I wanted to ask you about the Belichick stuff, because God, the last 24 hours have been funny. Is it at all possible and what percentage of possible do you believe it to be that now that Bill Polian has been wrongly accused and everyone still got their conspiracy theories, but one of them that is possible that is less nefarious than all the others is the 11 voters who did not vote for Bill Belichick thought it would be- At least 11. At least 11. Thank you. They could have. It's not unreasonable to think that because there were a limited number of senior votes that they could give and they could think that Bill Belichick was going to get everyone else's vote, they decided to use that on an Elsy Greenwood or someone else that would get in because they assume there's no way that Bill Belichick wouldn't get in. Are you willing to think that that's in any way plausible, as we all think and suspect the worst?
Well, yeah. There was a column written by someone in the Kansas City Star that said just that. And that happens in baseball, too, when you can only put 10 players on a ballot. There are great articles written each year. Take a look at our friend Jason Stark at the Athletic, where he will say that his ballot, there was room for a certain player one year, but not the next, or not last year, but this year. And then the reason behind that, it's a totally legitimate reason. It's really called ballot plane. It's where you understand where the person is in terms of needing 5% in baseball to stay on the ballot for the next a year, and you don't want someone to fall off the ballot. There's stuff like that that goes on all the time. It just so happens that enough people either thought that or thought that he was cheating him, wanted to penalize him a year, or wanted to make sure they acquiesced to Robert Kraft. Whatever the reason was, enough people had enough reasons that he did not get voted in. The funniest one for me is people thinking they're going to do a revote now, and maybe before the announcement, they will right the wrong.
That's what Cody said yesterday. Oh, my God, that's idiotic. That's like you don't like the result of an election. So what you say is, you know what? Let's recount it. No, no, forget the recount. Let's just redo it and only let a certain number of people vote. It's just people can ask for that, but it generally doesn't happen.
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You made it seem like murder. You did make it seem like that guy, that giant guy who welcomes everyone into the Hall of Fame. What is his name? I don't think Dave Baker is with us anymore, by the way. Okay, well, the guy who used to, who was 6, 7. Did he die? Did I kill him off? He just retired. I think he just went on a holiday. Maybe he just retired. That might be a $50 fine. That's a $50 on your head top. The fine bucket's coming back. I really hope this guy He's still alive. Wait a minute. Let's see what- I'm the only one who knew his name. I shouldn't get fined. What is his name? David Baker. No, you can't kill- See, David Baker. Is he still alive? Age 72. Still with us. Oh, my God. That's a $50 fine. You got to pay that. Okay. No, it's not a fake. I don't have 50 dollars cash on me. It's all right. It doesn't matter. We're going to figure this out. Yes. We'll take something else. He thinks it's a joke. No, it's not a joke. Put it on the poll. But also, I think it should be a bigger fine because David Baker, who is still alive, the way that you phrase that made it sound like David Baker was going to go to wherever Bill Paulian was and just shive him with a rusty- He's right, though.
A rusty utensil that he had sharpened in his kitchen. I think they're going to kill him. The stress. The stress of it. Yeah. David, what do you think? You said all of those reasons. What is most probable? Is it most probable that there is no conspiracy, there is no pettiness, there is none of the stuff that we love talking about, and it's just a clerical error?
It's not a clerical error.
You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Yes.
Okay, thank you. I'd say the most problem is that Robert Kraft was involved, and I read his statement very carefully. It was very carefully scripted, and it was meant to deflect. It was meant for people to say, Oh, yeah, there's a problem between us. You know that, I know that. But man, I would never get in the way of him being in the Hall of Fame because he should be unanimous first ballotter. I thought he went a little overboard. Robert Kraft is maniacal as many owners are, because you need to be to have that level of success and ego maniacal as well. And thinking that he controlled or attempted to control and succeeded in controlling a Hall of Fame vote, that's not a far reach. This stuff goes on in every sport. It just doesn't get talked about a lot.
So Paulian is just the fall guy then?
What is he the fall guy for?
For the guy who led the charge against Belichick not being in the Hall of Fame.
I don't know why he's being... That was just- I don't either. That's the point. I don't think the stress is... You think that's going to kill him versus a wide right? I think that not getting back to the Super Bowl or winning a Super Bowl is far worse than this. I mean, David, you see the things people were saying about him yesterday? Do you see the things people say about us?
I don't think that Bill Polian is necessarily internet savvy. I may be doing judgment there that's unfair, that is also ageist. I saw Jimmy Johnson tweet out his outrage and did so incorrectly by just randomly clicking on an NFL highlight of Fairbairn kicking a field goal. But let's listen to Jimmy Johnson here. Let's listen to Jimmy Johnson's outrage. He was calling people names yesterday and is boycotting the ceremony. Well, first of all, I I think this tarnishes everything in the Hall of Fame, all of the inductees, everybody in the Hall of Fame, just because of 10, 11, or 12 ignorant, jealous assholes who did not vote for him. I think it tarnishes everything about the Hall of Fame. Mcafee really enjoyed the saying of assholes on ESPN television. I smile. We all did. Even Hawk smile. I feel like Jimmy's more offended over this than it ever was with Jerry Jones. Put it on the poll at Lebitard show. He can't smile. Are you stunned that Hawk actually smile and showed you a human reaction that was not involved? I don't believe this. Let's see. No, it's obvious. Oh, my God. I want you to notice here.
I want you to This is the adolescence in this. We all had the same reaction. Jimmy Johnson said, Asholes on Disney television. Here it is again. Let's just play it again. Well, first of all, I think this tarnishes everything. I think this tarnishes everything. I think this tarnishes everything. I think this in the Hall of Fame, all of the inductees, everybody in the Hall of Fame, just because of 10, or 11, or 12 ignorant, jealous assholes who did not vote for him. I think it tarnishes everything about the Hall of Fame. He's also boycotting the ceremony. David, what are your thoughts there?
I'd like to stop playing that clip. That would be my first thought. My second thought is Jimmy Johnson not going to eat, whether he has other plans or If he really wants to make a statement, there's a lot of things you can do. You can go to the Hall of Fame and speak to the Hall of Famers, the intrinees, the selectors, and try to change the process and effectuate change in something versus a boycott. I'm not sure that's altogether going to be impactful or effective. I understand he's upset, and I will never sully him because he's a fellow survivor. But what I will say is that that was really ineffective when you resort to calling a writer an asshole because they have a certain vote a certain way. It's just wrong. He could be impuning other Hall of Famers. He could be talking down to people who are not writers. As you know, it's not just writers who do this. I found it to be performative and very much in line with what that show particularly enjoys and what causes them to smile, which is the lowest common denominator of humor.
I understand where and how sometimes David has a bit of narcissism when it comes to thinking that the audience knows about the entirety of his life. But when he calls Jimmy Johnson a survivor there, he is not saying of a disease. He's saying of the television show survivor, just so you know, because I saw Zaz's reaction here, and he's like, Did Jimmy have cancer? He's a fellow survivor. I will just point out to you. I know David comes on here. That was weird, right? He comes on here assuming that everyone listening to this that he was on survivor and Jimmy Johnson was on survivor. Furthermore, that is a implanted cancer survivor as how people think about survivors. I just wanted to make that clarification for everybody because you confused Zazlo and others around here by apparently giving Jimmy Johnson cancer he did not have, by the way that you phrase that.
Yeah, I don't use Zaz as my barometer. If Mike Ryan and others were, then it didn't land, though.
I'm not trying- Tony, what What did you think he was saying? It sounded weird when he said it, and I just had to do the math of survivor. Okay. Jeremy, did everyone here know he was talking about the television show, Survivor? Well, it gets mentioned every other appearance. All right, you guys did know. When we talk about old people in polian not being perhaps internet active, let's just put up the tweet that started all of this because Jimmy Johnson was calling them assholes. He was doing it on Twitter, but randomly, he's doing it, linked It's up to a Fairbair field goal that cut the lead to five. Highlight of a random. Yeah, it cut the lead to five with a 51-yard field goal in the Houston, New England game. It was 10 days later that he tweeted this. How did he even find that one? I've almost sent a tweet before. I'm like, Oop, I almost quote.
I've almost done that before.
How did he think to actually quote tweet? He didn't hit reply, he quote tweated. He was emotional. He just went immediately to whatever was the first thing and hit send because I've not seen Jimmy Johnson. Honest to God, I haven't seen this part of him publicly. He was He genuinely pissed off. Look, I'll give you some of the backstory here, okay? Bill Belichick wouldn't have a whole lot of friends like Jimmy Johnson who have an entire commonality that very few people wouldn't understand. It's a shortcut to friendship, right? That they both lived similar professional lives. Bill Belichick goes to Jimmy Johnson's boat and has envied the life that Jimmy Johnson has created post-football. And what Jimmy is doing there, Jimmy has gotten older, and when he old and emotional, he starts crying about things that matter to him. And while he makes a throw-up gesture when he talks about what football did to him, looking back on it, when he did so through his Hall of Fame career, he wept like a baby because he was given a fountain of youth to examine the gratitude he had that he didn't have time to have when he was busy competing.
And he just saw that his friend was denied that moment. So he's pissed off. He's just super angry that his good friend doesn't get the... After a pretty tough couple of years, we know that whatever you think of Bill Belichick's success, we can agree that the last couple of years of Bill Belichick's life had probably been more unpleasant than most. We can agree on that?
No. We can't? No, I do not. I know where David's going with this, I think.
Because he's having sex with a 20-year-old. That's what you guys are doing?
By the way, that's like 82% of happiness.
Oh, my God, David.
I go like 78. I mean, come on. Fine. 78, Cody. I'll come with you at 78.
If you're a caveman-What do you mean? Okay, if you're an ape or a caveman, yes. Okay, fine. That's the only way to get to happiness. I would say that the last two years of Bill Belichick's life have been fairly unpleasant publicly. Maybe you guys know things privately that I don't know. Publikely, that seems like an unpleasant thing to have happened to you, what the last two years have felt like for Belichick.
I think there's a big difference between being the subject of a PTFO and having Jordan to be all upset and threatened to sue and the way Bill views it all.
I'm talking about losing and your legacy, disgrace, and fighting with Bob Kraft in public. I'm talking about your professional identity being covered in cow shit.
Yet now that he didn't get in on the first ballot, all of a sudden, he gets this entire cycle of the greatest of all time, absolutely the biggest sleight in the history of Hall of Fame, based on total recency bias, I have to go back and look to see which other unbelievable players didn't get in in their first ballot to say that this is the number one sleight, the most egregious in the history perpetuated by nothing but media assholes. It's a little much to me. That's all. There is some truth to that.
I mean, yes, the last couple of years have been lousy publicly for Belichick. Last 24 hours, got a hell of a lot more praise than he's gotten in a couple of years. That is correct. That ends up being an interesting thing that's happened to Bob Kraft, where over the last 24 hours, it's the best reputation stuff that Bill Belichick has gotten in two years. That's not up for dispute. But you guys are telling me that part feels good without acknowledging the first part, which is the last two The last two years probably were unpleasant to him other than the time that he was having sex.
I like to think that Robert Kraft may have miscalculated and may be thinking to stuff, though owners very rarely actually think they've done wrong. Even when the result is bad They don't view their actions as the cause of that result. They view all of us as misinterpreting what the action was. You'd think that Robert Kraft would say, Wow, I miscalculated. I didn't realize what I'd be doing was adding to his legacy and helping him be more of a hero. I was trying to make sure that my thumb continued to stay on his shoulder and keep him below me. I wonder whether he regrets it. But knowing the way owners are, I would say he likely doesn't and views all of this talk as really nothing, and will all be soon forgotten. But Bill Belichick not being a first ballot Hall of Famer will be just part of his byline. Dan, it's not just the sex. It's the companionship.
It is. The snuggling. It's the little… Hey, let's go for a walk. The conversations. The yoga on the beach. Let's go rent a house with a squeaky door. We'll watch movies all night. How did Pablo find that? We should get a dog. World war three. Steuern erledigt? Safe. Mit Wieso Steuer, die Steuer-App, die dich versteht.
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Safe. Mit Wiso Steuer, jetzt kostenlos testen. Dunlabotard. World War 3. We're going to get that off the ground. World RAR 3, our group chat has a pretty good feeling about this one. This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugats. David, when you look at everything that is happening with Yannis Antetokumpo, your thoughts are what?
I'm just upset about how it's being handled. I'm upset that what's happening is that Shams comes out and says, now it looks like the Bucks are looking to listen. They're willing to listen. That doesn't change. Teams always listen on everybody. There's never been a time where you call on a player and say, no, no, I don't even want to hear what you have to say because there's always a trade that you will make for any player. Now, you deny that publicly, of course, and say, oh, that we would never trade this person. But in the real world, the call comes in And you're like, Hey, if you'd give five first-round picks and you'd give three players, all of whom are outperforming their contract, so it's an eight for one. Yeah, we'll do that right now. And so there's always a reason to listen. I don't think the Bucks have changed their mind. And the whole Yannis, I'm not going to ask for a trade. It's wrong. It doesn't actually work where the player walks in your office. I demand a trade. You just know by being in the clubhouse and being around the player, and you go up to the player, you're like, Hey, this is not working.
That happens way more often than a player just walking in, I demand a trade. It's all ridiculous. And by the way, Yannis to the heat with Ja Morant. Jeremy, this is what you think Pat Reilly is going to do? I find it to be hard to believe. Bill, let's open up Zillow.
I'm colonial. Jeremy, can you get me the tier of tears here? Can you get me the tier of tears and put it in front of David to see whether he likes or dislikes our rankings? Four and a half bath. All right, at the bottom, we have Frog in the Throat, then Snibbling, Choking back tears, Cutting onions, Allergies, Shedding a tear, Wimpering, the morning cry, or the Mourning Cry with a U, waterworks, crying a river, hysterical crying, crocodile tears, Blubbering, the Shower Cry, the Car Cry, and the Noshan Moreno tear. Polls are a lot of work.
That's too many choices. What about my personal favorite?
It's an escalation, though. It's an escalation. It's a ranking system. It's not just choices. It's going from the softest of tears and the least of the sadness to the most of the sadness. So it's an escalating tier of tears. I'm sorry.
Thank you. What's the number one, Jeremy? What's the number one?
Of course, the greatest is the Noshan Moreno singular tier during the national anthem. Look up red, fam.
Yeah, I I don't know enough about that to comment, but that would have been my number one. Crying in your car is just before that. What about crying at sad... Where's terms of endearment cry?
The morning cry, M-O-U-R-N-I-N-G, was like, fourth from the top. Right in the middle.
No, but that's morning someone you know, I assume, or morning a star.
Yeah, and then right before that is the morning cry of just waking up in the morning and getting yourself a good cry.
Right. I'm asking where the terms of endearment cry is, which is the movie or commercial cry, the sentimental cry.
It's probably just after crying a river, but before Crocodile tears.
No, I've I got it way ahead. It's actually my second most common tier is the... Both tiers, thank you, is the commercial movie cry. That, to me, is the second most common tier that I have.
You can make it your man cave. One of the schools like. David, can I, since you're going to be hosting, I hope, our Oscar show, since you're one of our movie experts, since you know movies so well, is it possible in any way that I can put on your screen, antenna, anywhere, the fact that terms of Endearman cry. In all the 40 years since that movie has been made, there are other movies that are more recent that would appeal to, I don't know, Drusky's audience, for example.
No, but I'd like to believe that you can talk about We'll Always Have Paris. There are certain things that transcend generations.
Yeah, Tony, how much do you know about Terms of Endearment, Tony? I have nothing. I don't know what we're talking about. Jeremy, how much do you know about the movie Terms of Endearment? I know that it makes you cry. I know the movie that makes me cry. You ever see About Time with Rachel McAdams and Donald Gleason? I love that. I cry every time. I cried harder at that movie than any other movie in my life. All right, so I asked you a question. You didn't answer it because you just wanted to say what you already had loaded up. No, that's not yes and. That's no, and I wanted just to add something here that you didn't ask me. That's actually no, and. That's not. I asked you, do you know terms of endearment? I know you wanted to get in your stuff, but do you know terms of endearment? Yes or no? No, I'm not very endearment. Okay, thank you. God Almighty, man. He's walking away. He didn't even send him away. I didn't send him anywhere because now I'm just genuinely I asked you a question. It's like, No, no, no. Let me do my show.
And it's like, How about you do ours? Got to redo the drive.
I personally thought that that was additive.
Yeah, I don't care what you think. We're going to need to What's the movie you're reviewing for this week? Chilling the Roof. He did what I am accusing him of. He just ignored me. He's like, Yeah, whatever you want to do, and I'll talk now about what I want to talk about. I had my thing lined Look at me. That's what he did.
The ultimate in ego is that you don't allow anyone around you for a no and. It's got to be a yes and, which is your code for keep it going, stay in character, follow my lead. Jeremy was actually doing something that was additive to the audience by saying, Hey, termsman, dear man, you're an old fart, but about time. That's not a recent movie, but that's one that everybody knows as a tearjerker. I thought it was outstanding.
Let's watch Househunters. I'll do international.
Let's talk about Chevy Chase. But wait a minute.
I can't even review the movie I want to review. David, they're doing a thing here. David. David. Dan's yelling at everybody. I mean, David.
You asked me to review a movie.
International is better because it's not just looking at Houses, but it's also a travel show, which I really like. You got a good idea of the culture, and let's put that on. And then Property Bros. Now talk about your comedian from the '70s that you want to talk about.
There's this A guy named Chevy Chase. He was in the original cast of a show called Saturday Night Live, which is still on Saturday nights at 11: 30 PM. There's a documentary called I'm Chevy Chase and You're Not, which was his signature line. Chevy Chase may be known to people as the guy from community, or he may be known as the guy who plays Fletch, or the one who flirt with Christie Brinkley. You may know him from myriad projects But in real life, he may be difficult, and I like it. It's a documentary that shows all the people who think that Chevy Chase is a true asshole, and I didn't care. I don't need him to be liked by his fellow cast mates. I don't need him to be enjoyed as a person. I want him to entertain me, and he has done nothing but entertain me my entire life. So I tipped my chapeau to Chevy Chase and thank him. Hey, you're not popular. You do a lot of Great. Thank you. That was my reaction to the movie. I thanked him so much during that film. I'm just glad he didn't die. I'm glad he didn't overdose like the other young comedians who did as much coke, and they died and then couldn't entertain me anymore.
I'm glad that Chevy did not die from all the coke.
David, why do you think he would agree to do this film?
I assume he was paid. Yeah, these guys do not have the money that you think they do. It's one of the weirdest things about what people's perception is of money. When he goes to these comic cons or does autograph sessions, you saw him during the movie. Remember, Dan, if you watched it, he was signing all those photos. That's a deal you get with a memorabilia dealer, and you get paid quite a bit of money if you're Chevy Chase. I assume for this movie, he got paid. Oh, I love that. I know he got paid. Every master interviewer-For the love of God, David, they're doing a thing. I can't hear a thing. David, give them the room to do it.
You stop talking and then we go. That's how that works, David. You use your ears. You don't stop talking. And then one more thing. As listening devices, you use your ears for their intended purpose. Let Mike and Chris do their thing. I think it'll still work. Bill Belichick and Jordan trying to make travel arrangements.
I love that backsplash.
He's got that island you like. Now go, David. Zaz, I should point out, I think David's wrong. I don't think it's because he was paid. I also don't think it was a sad movie. I think it was a complete picture of somebody who has been represented for 50 years as a bit of an asshole. And so there's There's some asshole in it, but it was a complete look at humanizing him. I don't think that he is upset. Maybe he's upset about the clip they used to sell it because it's the one clip that makes him look like a jerk to the interviewer. But the entirety of the movie is something that is a more complete picture of somebody that is just human is all it is. Did you cry during the movie, David? Because I think this is your favorite guy. He has made some of your favorite movies.
Can I go now? No, I didn't cry. I will tell you, though, that I know he wasn't in control and that he was paid because of the PR clip that was used. If it were his documentary under his name, that never would have been in the final documentary, and certainly it wouldn't have been the promo clip. Therefore, it was to draw an audience in who only knows him, maybe from his most recent work in community. It made him out to be terrible. Most people, as you know, only watch the preview and not the full movie. So they have this view of him, and I frankly I just don't think he cares. But no, I didn't find him maudlin.
I didn't cry during that documentary, but you know when I did cry, Dan? About time. You watched it? Minor penalty, two minutes for adding nothing. Dave, I looked up the plot for Terms of Endearment 1983. Yeah, this movie looks like it sucks. I would never watch this.
It's old, Tony, but take a look at who's in it.
No, I see some names I like. Jeff Daniels, Jack Nicholson, Excuse me, who's a former astronaut of some sort. But again, I think I'm good. David Samson, the name of the podcast is nothing personal. There are two things- That's what it says here. There are two things that I will remember from this hour that we have spent with him. One of them is this.
You do a lot of coke? Great.
The other is, for some reason, David decided he wasn't happy enough with the useless cliché of Tip My Hat, so he made it a French hat. He decided to not just tip his hat. For some reason, he tipped his chapeau. Or what is the word you used? That's what I said, yeah.
That's the word.
I know, but why'd you do that?
That's what a hat is.
Yeah, but why'd you go French, David?
Why do you go Spanish, Dan?
No, tip my hat. It's tip my... What do you mean? You're friends, David? If I'm talking to someone in Spanish, I go Spanish. If I'm talking to somebody in English, I don't go French with an American cliché. So this one's got high ceilings.
Oh, I love that crown molding.
Nothing personal. It's the name of the podcast. It is exceptional. And he watches a movie every day and has returned to reviewing movies on nothing personal as well. David, good seeing you. Thanks for the time. Feel free to use those things on the side of your head as listening devices, as opposed to just waiting for your turn to talk.
I promise I will going forward. Yes, I will not interrupt anymore.
Stop interrupting me.
I promise.
Stop talking when I'm talking.
Thank you. No, but I will leave you be.
Please stop talking. I'm trying to think about it. I promise I will change. Please stop. I need you to stop. I need you to just be quiet.
I'm just telling you I'm going to get better.
Just be quiet so that I could get to the end of this. I need you to stop right now. Just stop. Just stop.
I just have one thing to tell you.
No, I'm joking. You should have done it while I was talking, not when I stopped. That was the time to do it correctly.
You do a lot of coke? Great.
"You do a lot of coke? Great!"
David is here to discuss some fake tears from across the sports landscape as we listen in on a private conversation between Bill Belichick and Jordon Hudson as they shop for a new home.
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