Transcript of Local Hour: Buddy, Buster, or Brother

Chris Cody, I'm going to need your help here some. This chair that Zaslow sits in has a way of making people stronger and more confident. And so he just blew a whole bunch of breakfast breath in my face.

Oh, that's so embarrassing.

With the take that he had yesterday, which I heard on air, but he's still asking me off air, how is Miami minus seven and a half against the Gators not free money? What am I missing?

The hurricanes often hurricane.

This team is different. They look different.

What am I missing? They always do until they don't.

The Gators lost to the team that the Canes just beat by 37.

I worry about Georgia Tech. I don't worry about Florida because Florida may have something close to the athletes that Miami does. But I don't expect Cristobal to Cristobal in this one because he didn't Cristobal when they went up to the Gators with what It seemed to me a better team the Gators had last year.

That's not how crystal balling works. Crystal balling doesn't work against teams that you tight. It's against teams that you should win easily. That then you're like, Oh, how did this happen? It's inexplicable, not explicable. Thank you. Tony gets it.

Okay. And Tony does get it, and you get it as well. But this isn't the team program atmosphere culture that lost to Middle Tennessee State. This is not that. Yeah, it never is. But this is not... Is it not a team that you're watching through the first two games and you're like, Okay, that is physically strong and fast everywhere? And I'm not looking at a lot of teams and seeing that. In the first two games, I know the Notre Dame game was close, but it should not have been. And that's Cristobal Cristobal. But they won anyway. They looked physically stronger and faster than Notre Dame. I'm not wrong there, right? No. They had a two-touch down lead and should have expanded upon it and then did what they can do. I've told you before, as stunning a result as I've seen was Mario Cristobal with the team he had in Oregon losing a game to Stanford that I'm sitting there watching it and I'm like, I don't understand how this just happened. Stanford at the end of the game didn't have anything. Cristobal. Yeah.

That's how it happened, and that's how it will happen at some point.

Are those lines moving at all on the Dolphins and UM gators? Are those lines staying the same? It started, the Dolphins were 12 and a half point dog against the Bills tomorrow night, and Miami has stayed a seven and a half point favorite against the gators.

Didn't it open at eight and a half? I think seven and a half is bang on. That's a great line. Yeah, for people who want to make money on the game. This is a team that had five interceptions at LSU Should have won that game, playing an F minus game offensively. They shouldn't have lost to USF. If you watch that game, again, F minus effort, undisciplined. They found ways to lose that game. Their defense is talented now. I do know that they have some injuries Here in Lagway, if you look at the tape, looks broken. But this is a rivalry game. It's smell your own farts week for the University of Miami. This should be tighter.

Not only that, did you see what the money line spread is for the Canes on DraftKings? Minus 305, dolly.

Football.

Football is back, Jack. Oh, my, we've waited for so long, we're so damn excited that we put it in a song. Don't need no check downs. Give me big hits and quarterbacks. Keep your fantasy team from falling off the track. Football is back, Jack. Whether on the ground or through the air, when the chips are down and you throw a prayer, When your team is primed and on the hook, it's four to ten, you refuse to buck. When the shoulder pads and helmets crack, that's how you know that football is back, Jack. Let me hear you say, Football, football, football. Football is back, Jack. This high is wild and out of control.

And we're going to ride it every week till we reach the Super Bowl.

Don't need no check downs. Give me big hits and quarterbacks. If you say this game's the best, I'll say it's a gack. Football is back, Jack.

Football is bad Jack.

Football is bad Jack.

Football is bad Jack. Football is bad Jack. Football is bad Jack. Over the last 25 years of horrific Dolphin football, the longest playoff drought anywhere in the sport. You have heard me say that the Dolphins went from being a national team to being a regional team. They gave up all of the decades of excellence and now are a regional laughing stock. The athletic today has a headline, Mike McDaniel was the NFL's next coaching prodigy, then the Dolphins started losing. What is presently around McDaniel isn't around any other coach this early in the season, correct? Because it wasn't that long ago that the Dolphins went to the Bills in a playoff game with their third string quarterback and almost won the game. And since then, they're 8 and 14. That's fast how that happened, because to go from prodigy to Rex Ryan's on television calling you nerd boy as if he's the cool one. Rex Ryan, comfortable calling you nerd boy, creates a visceral reaction around this person that is polarizing and poisoned because the lack of trust that the fan base right now has in its leadership makes the Dolphins the only loud laughing stock like this early in the season that is surrounded by flying planes, booing, and the expectation that the coach is going to be fired.

We did wonder aloud once Mike McDaniel showed up in the town, and he was a breath of fresh air. You don't necessarily hear head coaches talk like that for a reason, because we wondered aloud like, Well, how does this look if they run into adversity? How does this approach work if they struggle? And I think we now know it doesn't help matters. When he's out there in front of a microphone searching for the words, it gives off bumbling, confusing over your head rather than, Wow, what a breath of fresh air.

Step into the micro and say, I'm Today's a great day because we're one step closer to death. Death does that mean?

It's fine if you're three and oh. It's funny and refreshing if it's three and oh. But if you're oh and three, it screams this guy should not be leading a football team.

It's also not that quick of a hook if they get rid of him after this year. Brandon Staley didn't last this long with the Chargers, and he was also viewed as the next up and coming genius coach.

Four years a long time. This is year four. Long time.

The thing that bothers people a lot, though, you guys have heard me say this before, that in sports, the greatest crime, if you want, outside of real crimes, the greatest optical crime, public relations crime is thinking that you're better than everyone else or giving off something that seems like unearned arrogance. We don't mind so much when the arrogance is earned. It might bother us, but you'll beat the respect out of us if the arrogance is earned. But Staley and McDaniel suffer from the same thing. It's film room guy who's there for 12 hours doesn't like when new young toddler comes in and thinks he can scheme everyone to death because he's smarter than they are. Charlie Weiss endured this at Notre Dame. He goes from Belichick's side to Notre Dame, and in his first press conference, he says, I have a significant schematic advantage. Then they gave him a giant contract. They might still be paying that. I think it was a giant contract for Charlie Weiss that they paid long after Charlie Weiss was gone, but he got undressed, which is not great when you think of him and his physical features that we've mocked because it looks like the bottom half of his body is turned reverse and the bottom half of his body, the back of his body is in the front and the front of his body is in the back in the lower half.

But Staley and McDaniel, they paid their dues. It wasn't like they just were handed jobs. They worked their way up in both their situations. With Staley, it just became a thing where Staley is smarter than everyone. He's the analytics guy. Look at him. He never kicks a field goal. He never punts. He always goes for it on fourth down. And then that didn't work. And then they said, You know what? We have our franchise quarterback. We're wasting him. We have to get rid of him. Mcdaniel is almost a victim of being too successful too early, right? Had you flipped last season in this season to his first two seasons, and his first two seasons with these two, you'd be like, Wow, this guy's figured it out. We should maybe extend this guy. But the reality is, he peaked with this team a little bit early, so now everything that he's doing on the back end is a disappointment.

Instead of him figuring it out, it seems like he's been figured out. We've seen this before in the NFL. Guys come into the league, they look good early, and then the league figures them out, and then they got nothing in their bag to respond to it.

Well, but I don't believe McDermott actually is any smarter than McDaniel. I just believe he's got a quarterback that the Dolphins don't have, and he's made that quarterback someone who no longer turns the ball over. We're going to get to some to us sound here that explains why it is the Bills are now the new patriots of the AFC East. Listen to tua. This is not something you hear very often as preview to a Thursday night game, Bills Dolphins. He's top tier. If it's not with his arm, it's with his legs. That dude can do literally anything he wants. So definitely different skillset for me. I can't do half of what he does when it comes to running the ball and any of that. And then with how he can just chuck a ball down the field with how far and the arm strength that he has. He's supreme when it comes to that. So it's going to be fun.

It's not going to be fun.

That's embarrassing. I hate that. I wish they would inject him with lie serum. Honestly.

Some of that stuff Adam Silver has been He's making late link.

Oh, my God, that guy.

I am so furious listening to this sound. Honestly, he undersold it. He can't do three quarters of what Josh Allen does. He undersold it. He's too comfortable these last two weeks telling everyone what he can't do. At the postgame press conference the other day, he's like, I can't throw the ball at 80 yards. Just like, Don't say that. I'm excited to see Josh Allen. He's so much of a better quarterback than me. I can't do half the stuff he does. It's like, Don't say that. This isn't the swant on your career. What do you want him to say? Not that. I want him to lie. I want him to lie. And say what? I'm better than Josh Allen? Anything but what he's saying. He's talking like a veteran who's 43 years old on his way out of the league, and he's like, I can't keep up with these young guys. It's like, buddy, we just give you a $250 million contract. You know what? It's a good point. Figure it out. What are you talking about? This is your fourth season. Oh, he can throw it down the field.

This is sixth year.

That's whatever it is. A quarterback should be able to throw it down the field. I hated that sound. That's a guy that's got $250 million dollars coming to him, and he's like, I don't really care what happens. Listen, Buster, this is how it works in the NFL. That money's fake, okay? You don't have $250 million. There's someone that can do something that goes around over there, and then boom, boom, boom, that money's gone real quick. Nfl money is fake as hell. So if he thinks that that $250 million is guaranteed, he can just walk around and say, I'm not that good at my job. It's not That's how it works.

But it says on the contract that a certain amount is guaranteed.

Yeah, that money is guaranteed. The rest of it is not. I'm going to look up guarantees right now, Zazlo.

I know it's a Wild Willy Wednesday, okay? But I did not expect the escalation to go from you calling to a buddy to calling him Buster.

That Buster was for Tony.

After you bought to a jersey and you- The frame was more expensive than the jersey.

That's the part that I'm regretful of, if I'm going to be honest with you.

Frames easily 200 bucks.

300. It was crazy. You got ripped off. I told this before. I don't know if you know this. The frame guy asked me, he's like, Are you sure you want to frame this jersey? No. Yeah. He's like, I heard that they may cut him on Sunday. He almost rejected business. Yeah, he almost rejected business because this was right before they signed up for the extension. I don't know how they might cut him this week. Are you sure you want to do this? I'm like, Brother, you're the worst businessman I've ever heard.

It's a two of jerseys. He's a starting quarterback for the Dolphins. What jerseys is he also saying that about? This is the starting quarterback of the Dolphins.

This is coming off of year two where they made the playoffs without him, where it's like, once he's back, we're good. It's that stupid wrestling was going on. They're telling Dan that his brain was... He's going to arrest Mike McDaniel.

I can't stand that guy. Nowinski?

Oh, please.

Can you imagine watching sports with him?

No.

He's sitting there just, Oh, my God, there's someone with their head. Great. Let's tweet.

What a drag that guy is. Not even a good wrestler. Probably the worst doctor. Terrible wrestler.

Put it on the poll, please, at Lebitard Show, most condescending, because I did not have this happening in the first 20 minutes, Buster, buddy or Brother, because you've hit people with the trifecta here over the first 20 minutes of Wild Willy Wednesday. One of the things happening with McDaniel that I wanted to examine with you guys for a second, because I don't... Maybe Staley got some of this, but to my recollection, the time that I saw this thing happen the most, when Michael Lewis explained Moneyball and what the A's were doing by gaming the analytics to view the game differently than everyone else, and they were doing it differently at the time, a whole bunch of potbellied scouts wandered over, 80 years old, and they're like, What does that guy know that we don't know? I feel the game in my bones. What does that computer say? I don't care about that. People are enjoying What's happening here with the dolphins, Rex Ryan calling him nerd boy because a football coach is supposed to be the guy who curses a lot and then says, Let's go get a snack. It's just violence and caveman grunting.

When you ask John Gruden about, Hey, your math seems wrong on fourth down. And he says, What do those computer guys know about making a call on fourth down? I feel the game in my gut. That's what's happening around this coach. People are enjoying laughing at him because, Oh, you didn't actually have any advantages with all your analytics and your scheming.

Can I ask you a question? Why do people still invoke Moneyball? I don't know. As if they were any successful. First off, the movie is all about Scott Hatterberg and not one of the greatest pitching staffs in the 21st century. It's like they made a movie about the Wild Cat. Same exact level of success. Oh, we found this incredible thing where Roni Brown takes a snap, and we don't win Jack shit with it. Can we stop talking about Moneyball?

Well, I would say that the reason that we talk about it is because, not unlike the Tampa Bay Rays who have also not won anything, they found a way to compete with less money with the teams that had the $100 and $200 million money advantage.

Can we make a movie about how they got good draft picks and good pitchers?

Can we at least agree that it's ridiculous that not once in that movie were Zeto, Hudson, or Mulder mentioned?

They had Jason Giambi. They were really best. It's not about necessarily winning within the margins. It's about the sport rewards the bad teams with good draft picks, and they draft well.

This episode is supported by FX's The Lowdown, starring Ethan Hawk.

Allow us to introduce you to Lee Raybon, a quirky journalist, rare bookstore owner, unofficial truth seeker who's always on the tail of his latest conspiracy.

This time, his most recent exposé puts him head to head with a powerful family that rules Tulsa. Meaning only one thing, he must be onto something big. Fx's The Lowdown premieres September 23rd on FX, stream on Hulu.

Dan Levatard. I went in the margins. I'm like, You're a money ball of sex? I'm basically Scott Hatterberg for a fucking- A lot of walks. Stugats.

A lot of walks, but I'm on base.

When it comes to sex, I'm Scott Hatterberg. A lot of foul tips. Other dudes, they can be Jiambi. You know your role you play? I know my role.

This is the Dan Levatard Show with the Stugats.

That's part of it. But I would say that in a salary-capped sport like football, you want to have the management team that knows how to find inefficiencies better than the other management teams. And it's one of the places. If you're going to make the money equal, which it's equal, to has how much guaranteed? It's 160 what million?

167 million.

So if you're going to make the money equal, and if you can't actually overcome, oh, if you miss on Deshaun Watson, you're done. If you give that guaranteed money, if that's the mistake you make, it's going to set you back for years. We're spending so much time these days talking in football about what guys make and who's the highest paid offensive lineman, et cetera, et cetera. We're doing a lot of money talk. So what we had that excited us with McDaniel when they were scoring 70 points is, oh, my God, they figured something out. And then I can make the criticism, you just made a money ball. What did they figure out? They got Tyreek Hill. They got the fastest player. Of course, they score 70 points in a game. It would have broken the record if they... I think McDaniel didn't even go for a field goal late in that game, or they would have broken the record for points in a game.

But that game wasn't even just Tyreek Hill. That was Devon Achan's coming out party. We're like, oh, my God. It's more than just Moster. We have reinforcements. This team is fast and it's young and there's depth here that they can continue with this offense. If someone goes down, they can keep reloading here.

This is interesting, though, to me as the Eagles now fight back on pridefully. Really, you're going to change the rules because we do something that can't be stopped? The Dolphins, as a study, were trying to win the game by scheming and being faster than you and looked faster. As soon as it got to the playoffs, we're all like, Yeah, fast but soft. And so football is all about, No, we're going to keep hitting you in the mouth, especially now that all the quarterbacks are throwing for 150 yards. It's just, We're going to keep pounding you in the mouth. And who's going to be the champion? The team that Tush pushes.

I do feel for Mike McDaniel in this Dolphins regime a little bit in that they made it to the playoffs twice. They had Skyler Thompson in there. This isn't exactly what the whole franchise was built on.

Almost won that game with Skyler Thompson.

At Buffalo. I know. Look, we're a speed team. We're going to put up We're more finesse. Let's have the coldest payoff game in the history of this franchise and against the team of the Generation in the Kansas City Chiefs. It is a little bit of tough luck. Okay, but where are we now?

It doesn't end at that point. Yeah, they were unlucky with all the injuries and the weather, and they're playing the Super Bowl champions and the Chiefs. Okay, let's keep it moving. And then last year was last year. Now this year, it's this downward trajectory. Like, whatever. So they made the playoffs the first two years. Who cares? Let's keep moving here. And look at them. They're embarrassing.

But it wasn't just bad luck because they had... Those seasons came down to loss the Titans. It's all our fault. Last season, they missed the playoffs because they lost the tight in early in the week. That's our fault. We did a watch-along. We did a switch it that day. The season before, they lost the Titans on Monday Night Football when they had control of the division.

They were up three games with five to play, and somehow they still did not win the division. Our fault.

Lost to the Titans.

Two years in a row. Last year, they missed a play by a game, and they lost to the Titans week three or week four.

And the Monday night one were ahead by two shutdowns in the fourth quarter.

Three minutes left, not just the fourth quarter.

You could point to that as ground zero.

He does that to everyone. If you squinted that night, Dan.

You. That game is where the descent started, and it happened pretty quickly. I do want to, before we I'll get to UM and UF, though, just examine the glee around the downfall. Because when Rex Ryan is on television calling you nerd boy, that is not a level of disrespect. He's talkative and he's outspoken. That's not a level of disrespect that he ever gives another head coach.

When he wants the job, he goes after them. He's done this before.

He was pretty hard on Brandon Staley.

When he sees a job that he might get, he goes after them.

He's pretty good at speaking to, and I think Billy was right in Brandon Staley because it's an affront to not just football people, but you watching at home. Brandon Staley literally caused his team a playoff opportunity because he thought he was smarter than everybody else, and everyone's just applying conventional wisdom. So I do think that people do relish in these people struggling because they gave off, I'm smarter than you.

The other thing, too, is some guys are just built to be coordinators. Staley, B-Flow. Maybe Mike McDaniel is not a CEO, head of the company guy. Spagnola.

Not a head Head Coach, amazing coordinator. All of the guys are there. You know why I don't make- Wait, Phillips is the all-time guy, right?

Yeah. You know why I don't agree with that? Is because I remember when Belichick was only a coordinator. Everyone said that about Belichick. Didn't have what it took.

They were right.

They were right. I think they're right. He got Tom braided. Yeah, I think they're right. And look at them without them.

Do you watch that game against TCU?

I would argue that very often we make these assessments over here, and the sport hasn't quite been taken over by all of the schemers and analytics guys. But you're not going to convince me that Siriani is a great deal smarter than the other people he's coaching against, and certainly not Andy Reid. You're just not going to convince me of it. You're going to tell me that Siriani's head coaching material, and I'm going to be like, Okay, if you say so, but that seems like an ideal guy given his initial press conferences. You're doing it because they win. You're not doing it because you can make the assessment. I can say this, Mike Martz was that. Mike Martz was that, only offense, only coordinator, and didn't end up winning in the Super But come on. You guys can't make that assessment from your couch because you don't like the personality of somebody. You can't do it. You're going to do it based on the results. You can't do it accurately. When I remember Belichick, everyone said when Belichick was hired by the Jets and then resigned on a napkin, that guy's not a guy who can be running your franchise.

That's somebody who's very good at coaching defense, and that's what he's going to do. Then you guys told me that Charlie Weiss is just a coordinator, and Matt Patricia is just a coordinator. And yeah, they were just coordinators. But before that, they learned from the guy who was just a coordinator. Until he won, what? How many championships? Seven? How many did he win? Six. Six, sorry.

As a head coach. What is the percentage point of head coaches that get to say, Hey, good run. You were great. You were awesome. You can have this job as long as you like. It's a transient position. This is the life cycle of head coaches, about four years, where you get frustrated because someone else in your division is beating your ass because they have better players than you. And you think that, Well, let's clean house. That'll be the way. When really, you need to strike on a quarterback. And Dolphins fans thought that they did, but he couldn't take the hits in the league.

Okay, but we didn't imagine, all right, when Mostert was scoring 18 touch downs, and we knew that wasn't an 18-touchdown player, that that was Mostert's ability. None of us were doing that. We're like, That's a really fast player.

You weren't doing this offensive scheme dating back to Mike Shanehan has gotten Mike Anderson in the way that's scary paid.

We You were giving the coach the credit for Mostert being what he was.

Mostert was a jag. It's a scheme. It's a scheme, which made the first year so confusing because the running game wasn't what Mostert did it. He showed you, Versatility, I can do it either way. Hey, third year, tight ends are a thing now.

The thing about him, McDaniel acting, quote, unquote, acting like he's smarter than everyone else, is we wouldn't sound howling with laughing, Betrayal right now if all of us hadn't believed it. That was something we were believing when they were He's scoring 70.

Out of the three key pieces here, let's throw Tyreek Hill in there. We all know Tyreek Hill is a problem. It's a super talented player.

It's four key pieces. It's four.

It's a quarterback, too. Well, that's what I'm saying. The only reason we all thought Tua was any good was because the stats that he put up in Mike McDaniel's offense. The only time you've ever seen Tua be good and had belief in Tua was with Mike McDaniel.

Well, no, in college, he was under nick Saban. Everyone believed in him. Fair enough. I'm talking about the pros. And then when he came here, he came to Brian Flores, who did not want him to succeed. Yeah.

I'm talking about the pros, though. I mean, I've seen him do it with Tua. So I'm more inclined to believe Tua is an issue than Mike McDaniel.

Look, it's an easy answer. I think they're both issues because Mike McDaniel's job when he got here, he had two jobs when he first got here. The first job was, can you show us if Tua can play That was his first job, and he succeeded at that. All right. Once we found that part out, okay, step two of your job is, can you actually coach the entire team now? And what we're learning is, Not sure. Not sure if you can coach the entire team. And the two apart, he did his job there, except based on what I'm seeing, I think two is broken. I don't think he's the quarterback he was three years ago.

He also had no success without two. Every Every time two has been out, he has not won those games. I don't think that we can just say that Mike McDaniel is great at his job and two is holding him back.

I think the other thing, too, is he runs a tough scheme.

Didn't Tyreek Hill say, I just learned the scheme this year? It's been three years. He might be an idiot. Possibly. But again, as you're a quarterback coming in, you're Snoop Hunt being like, All right, I have to learn this super complicated scheme in a week. Let me figure it out. It's really tough. Dan Levatard.

My algorithm on Instagram is, Dance all boobs.

Stugatz.

It's a good algorithm.

This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugatz.

This stuff happens very quickly, where you go from genius to Rex Ryan calling you Mick genius and nerd boy. It happens so quickly that I know people are going to Listen to this Dabo Sweeney sound, and they're going to hear the arrogance of what it is that Dabo Sweeney does. But I'm going to play that sound for you so that you guys hear him remind you of what he is and what Clemson's been, because you start with a loss. You start with a couple of losses if you're Clemson, and you see how quickly the whole thing evaporates on you. You create the expectations. You guys have heard me say this before. I cannot imagine what it's like to be Vrabel in New England because you create such unreasonable expectations that an entire generation of people forgets that the Patriots were bad for 40 years before that. They were terrible for 40 years before that, and It was a miracle that they made the Super Bowl and then got slaughtered with Steve Grogan at quarterback. Then everyone just gets real forgetful. It's not just decades over which they get forgetful. They get forgetful the first two games of a season in college football.

But certainly, it's easier to be Mike Vrabel than it to be Gerard Mayo. Correct.

He's the savior that's going to come in and get them right back on track. By the way, they were on track at the end of the Belichick.

All right, make it Alabama then. Don't make it the Patriots if you don't want to make it the Patriots.

Don't take that job. Don't take these jobs. Don't follow the legend. Just don't take these jobs. But what happened to Mush champion in Florida? Makes it to an SEC Championship game, recruits at a top 10 level. Out of here. In fact, they fired three coaches, each of them with an improving winning percentage. I read that Billy Napier has to win his 28 next games to match Dan Mullen's winning percentage. Just don't follow the legends.

I mean, if you're Calin DeBore, though, it's hard to say no to eight years, $87 million. I'll take the ego hit because maybe it works, but if it doesn't, you're good. Got a house on the keys.

There are also examples in college football- Life's definitely happy. Where guys keep the machine going because Larry Coker and Ryan Day would laugh right in my face saying, We can follow the legends.

Ryan Day has been great.

Larry Coker.

Not great.

Perfect. Just coordinator. Sweet man. But one more at the beginning of his career than any coach in college football history. But only a coordinator. Used up all of the Butch Davis talent and couldn't get another job after that, but did almost win two consecutive championships, if not for Terry Porter, that cheating bum that needs to be interviewed by the assembled media.

When's Pablo going to get on that? Grilled.

Larry Coger also tried to rebuild UTSA afterwards.

I mean, built it from the ground up.

I love that sweet man. Don't nobody dare say anything bad about him. He went to my church. I love him. He's a sweet man.

He seems like a really nice guy. He was.

No, he's not Greek Orthodox. I went to University Baptist Church when I was in high school.

Was? You didn't kill... That's not a $50 fine, is it?

No, I don't know. I'm just saying it was in the past since from when I shook his hands.

No, he recently embraced the devil.

Yes, that's right. Ghost. He's still a nice guy. I think Larry Coker did not. Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Has Larry Coker recently embraced the devil? I don't know why Billy did that.

Well, because you said you used to be a Greek orthodox, whatever. I was trying to cover for Mike because he's not dead. So when you said he used to be, how did he used to be? Did he die? No, he didn't die. He just embraced the devil. He no longer Greek orthodox.

Brian Forrest, maybe coordinator juice.

Listen, I'm going to come right out and say it. I don't know that for a fact. In fact, I may have invented that just for entertainment purposes. I don't know his stance on the devil. Probably anti-devil.

Very anti-devil From my limited engagements with a man.

Now, if you're a pro devil, whatever, that's you. No judgment here, but I don't think that's-I would judge someone who's pro devil.

Really? Yeah. Why? You can put that on me. I'll judge the hell out of you if you're a pro devil.

Why is that?

Because the devil sucks, man.

How do you know?

Believe me, I know.

Have you ever met anyone that you're like, You know what? I heard really bad things about this person. They're not that bad.

Look, I know it's Wild Billy Wednesday. You're going to start this shit here. You're going to defend the devil.

No, I'm not defending the devil. I'm just saying I don't know the devil personally, so I don't want to judge or judge others that may have a more intimate relationship with the devil. He's already been judged.

You don't want to judge the devil? I feel like that's an okay one to judge, even if you want to be non-judgmental.

It's a slippery slope.

I don't think that's a slippery slope.

You start with the devil. You start with the devil, and then I'm out there and someone's telling me, Hey, Fatsa, why are you eating that French toast today? I'm like, Whoa.

That slope is so dry. It's not slippery at all.

It's on fire, too. There's fire all around.

Lava, though. Lava's slippery until it dries.

Since 2011, okay, Clemson has had double-digit wins every season but one since 2011. So this is why Dabo's mad when people yell at him about losing to a very well-coached Georgia Tech team. If they want me gone, if they're tired of winning, they can send me on their way because that's all we've done is win. So if they're tired of winning, we've won this league eight out of the last 10 years. Is that not good? I'm just asking, is that good? I don't know if that's good or not to win your league eight out of 10 years, to go to the playoff seven out of 10 years, to be in Four We got a lot of championship. We win it twice. Yeah, we're a little down right now, take your shots, but I got a long memory in case you all don't know. We'll be all right. We'll bounce back. This is a program built to last. Always has been, always will be. I would just say if you give up on us. If you don't believe in us because we've lost two games down to the last three, you didn't believe in us anyway, so it don't matter.

You weren't all in anyway. If you're all in, you burn the ships, man. There ain't no exit strategy. You're freaking all in. Hey, listen, I mean, if Clemson's tired of winning, they send me on my way, but I'm going to go somewhere else and coach. I ain't going to the beach. Hell, I'm 55. I got a long way to go. You all are going to have to deal with me for a while. I got a long way to go. I'm just getting going. I'm just now good enough to be a head coach.

Is there a profession on Earth that talks more highly of himself than the college football head coach?

It's right, though.

He's absolutely right. He's absolutely right. He did that at Clemson. He beat nick Saban's Alabama when they were absolutely rolling. He had the season last year that Clemson fans were pining for for three decades. He is absolutely right. I remember what they were saying last year, and they ended up winning the ACC and playing admirably well at Texas in the college football playoff. He's absolutely right. That guy can stay in charge at Clemson as long as he wants.

There's a generation of people who do not know that Clemson used to have a verb, Clemsoning, that was super negative, that the team was going to collapse under every circumstance. That has been eliminated since 2011. They do nothing but double-digit win since 2011.

Beat nick Saban's Alabama twice with Deshawn Watson and a true freshman, Trevor Lawrence, both of which are ass in the pros right now. Ass.

That is important to point out. He won with two terrible quarterbacks.

Great college- Great college-.

Nfl quarterbacks.

Number one draft pick.

Terrible. That's why I said right now. But I mean, Trevor Lawrence was a true freshman.

Those are not terrible quarterbacks. Look at that.

They're great college quarterbacks.

Trevor Lawrence has never looked better than he did with Dabo as a freshman. Never looked better.

I've been doing this too long if we're going to take number one draft picks and say that they're terrible college quarterbacks.

Have you not watched Trevor Lawrence?

Their ass right now. Their ass right now. Dabo absolutely should get a lifetime contract from that. Go ahead. Let that get away. Alabama will be the first phone call that he gets. And with that support system, he'll get that train moving again.

I think if Trevor Lawrence went back to Clemson today, he would light up college football.

That's true. When you say their ass, I believe that the ass gets a bad rap here. I believe that the ass is a very functional thing. There's some good ass. There's a lot of good ass.

They're the badass. You want to fight me on Trevor Lawrence and Deshaun Watson being ass presently? They are ass-ass.

I am fighting you on an ass as an insult. The ass is necessary. There are many fine asses. The way that you guys are describing this right now, and trust me, I had Jacksonville on the money line Sunday. When he dropped back to pass, what I saw was a body with an ass on top, with a face mask. There was an ass on his head.

He was wearing number seven, Dan.

That's what he was wearing. Mike Williams is out of the league now. He's retired. Chr. Wilkins, ass. I'm just saying, those Alabama teams that they beat, they got guys still in the league. We could be about a donkey, a mule, that type of ass.

Not all ass is bad. I'm telling you, there's a lot of ass on my algorithm, and it ain't that bad.

He works hard.

I'm sure Wilkins is injured and then released from his team because of something weird, something that we don't exactly know.

He was expendable.

Where is he now? Did he resign anywhere?

I think he's still recovering from whatever his injury was.

He kissed someone on the head. That's what allegedly-Conflicting reports.

We know. Other people have gone at like, You're softening your reporting. That's not actually what happened. There's a whole thing. Then the game started and we're like, We don't give a shit anymore.

Justin Tucker anywhere? Is someone going to sign Justin Tucker when they get into a panicked situation? Just with me.

Justin Tucker-I don't know if anybody's kicking situation is going to be that desperate. I'm pretty sure Justin Tucker is done, done.

I'd be shocked. Yeah, I got ball-sacked not too long ago where I'm like, The Brown signed him. And then that's why I remember. I was like, Yeah, he's... I was like, No, that was fake.

Is that the verb you want to use with Justin Tucker, that you got ball-sacked without any context? I think Without any context, no one would know what that meant.

Precisely. With the context is why it becomes bad. You're the problem. You made this bad.

Um and UF is this weekend. And while they don't play all the time, I'm old enough to remember when that was the University of Miami's biggest game and biggest rival, that there was no rival bigger than Florida. I think some of that has dissipated because the games were against Florida State, and Miami He doesn't hate Florida State. Bobby Bauton is part of the reason for that. But when you think of rivalries with Miami, Notre Dame goes to a higher level than Florida because all those games in the past were always for the championship. But Florida, Miami I thought that that's why the point spread is where it is, honestly, because people are just giving... The money is giving respect to the idea that teams that don't like each other and have rivalry games, that those games are often very close or closer than you expect them to be.

I think the sports folks are just trying to help boost the economy because that's free money.

I think it's a perfect line. Florida showed last year that when their backs are up against the wall, they play hard for their head coach. To me, this is my most hated rival. I know the feeling is not mutual. Florida, even though they would readily admit that they hate Miami, they'd consider Georgia their biggest rival. I got Florida, Florida State, Notre Dame, and then the Virginia Techs of the world. But I think that Florida's defense is- The Kings are Probably fourth on Florida's list.

They would have Georgia, Tennessee, Florida State.

Lsu.

But only because they stopped playing.

They stopped playing. And this was absolutely Florida's choice to stop playing Miami. Miami would absolutely play Florida every year if they could. And it dates back to the gator flop. It dates back to recruiting battles. Over the last five years or so, the fiercest battles between these two teams have been on the recruiting trail.

But why have they been so readily willing over, really like the last 10 plus years, 15 even, to start playing again.

I mean, these were scheduled years ago when Florida had their program running and Miami was desperate to get back to that level. And it's a big-time moneymaker. I think we'll go several years again without seeing these two teams play.

Is this the last one scheduled?

Yeah, last one scheduled, I believe.

This is the big rivalry. You guys are talking about from the fan's perspective. From the players, though, a lot of these kids grew up together. I would argue Miami, Florida, the players think this is the biggest rivalry.

Most of the players on this field had a decision to make, do I go to Florida or do I go to Miami? And they picked their sides.

The way that Florida played, you said they could have won that game, and they could have. And it's hard to win a game when your quarterback is throwing five interceptions. I don't know how many there have been in history where your quarterback is throwing five interceptions.

Usually, you get taken out after four.

Or you're Jared Goff.

I have not seen a quarterback play that was quite that catastrophic this year. And they were all these throws. What you saw on almost all of the throws was, oh, he's flopping it in there super soft, and he's just giving a lot of time for that. He doesn't have the arm strength. Langley thinks he's got a stronger arm than he does trying to make those throws against the secondary that can move.

I'm a lagway believer in watching that game live. I haven't done a rewatch, but I do know people that do breakdown film, and they say, This guy is broken. But you can tell, he entered fall camp. We all know about the shoulder injury, but then he got a calf strain. And you can see in his throws, he not using his lower body to throw these balls. And that's why they don't look the same way. And also, I think it played a role in his conditioning. Dj Lagua is a big dude. He's like 250 pounds. He's a big guy, and it doesn't look particularly in shape.

You saw the interceptions, though, right? He's throwing the ball to places where it's a bad throw, bad decision, thrown too softly. And he's telegraphing in a way that's giving the corners in safety plenty of time to size it up. Lsu wasn't making great plays to make those interceptions.

No, no. In fact, watching that game, I'm like, I think Brian Kelly is maybe not the first question, but is your offense ass also? It's a very reasonable question.

I wish someone opened Brian Kelly's next press conference by trying to provoke him. Why is your offense so ass? Excuse me, Brian.

We just need one run to not be ass. Did you not see it?

I already told you, there's a lot of ass out there that's good, my algorithm.

Okay, you've mentioned this before. I thought it was boobs. I thought your algorithm was boobs.

There's a lot out there on the algorithm. I don't discriminate.