Transcript of "Kareem Rahma" New

Hello, listener. My name is Jason. I am one-third of the machine you have tuned in to listen to. Speaking of machinery, those two tools are on their way in. Sit tight. Turn it up. Here it comes. Welcome to Smartless.

Smartless.

Smartless.

Smartless.

Hey guys, guess what?

What is it?

There's our live episodes out now on YouTube with Jonah Hill from The Avalon. Our live episode.

How can people find it?

It's at youtube.com/smartless. Is that right?

Say it again, I wasn't writing.

It's— yeah, it's at youtube.com/smartless.

Huh huh.

And you can watch it, and it's a live show at the Avalon with Jonah Hill.

So you sit at the set of Heroes?

This is correct.

All right, well, thanks for the housekeeping there. Anyway, let's get back to things.

By the way, um, what do you guys think of my shirt?

I do notice you're wearing a NASA hat today. Are you, are you feeling, uh, excited about the Artemis 2?

Isn't that wild? Yeah, let's talk about that.

Why is everybody freaking out about that? Because we've been going like traveling to Mars.

No.

Well, but like, we did the moon loop— did the moon landing in '68, '69, something like that.

'69.

Yeah. They're not even landing on the moon. They're just going to kind of do a little lasso around it.

They're pussies.

They're pussies.

But it's just like, why is everyone like, oh, God?

No, I think it's amazing what they're doing. They're—

I'm not belittling it, by the way. I'm just saying, like, help me understand these things.

Yeah, I know. Well, because it's the farthest anybody's been ever. Is that right?

Or— I think so. I think it's the farthest humans— yeah, from Earth.

From Earth.

Yeah, because we're traveling around the back side of it as opposed to landing on the front of it.

That's correct.

Yeah, right.

Well, that seems like they're reaching for a record there, you know?

I mean, that's like— that's like not going to Jason's house but just stopping at Will's house.

Yeah, I mean, I just don't know if that's something you feel—

it feels like the equivalent of Oscar bait.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, what if they did—

what—

how about this? What if they do that one loop, right, so they qualify for first, and then when they come back around Fuckin' land the thing. Like, you know, and like drive the buggy around again and hit another golf shot. That'll be really sensational.

I'm gonna try to get you an email address so you can send this in.

I'm sure they're looking for ideas over there.

Of course.

Wait, Jay, but I think they're— I think the idea is to collect more information so that the next one they can land on the moon.

Like, again? Yeah, I think. What about if they put like— build like a little treehouse on it or something?

Well, I think they're talking about that. Yeah, they're talking about like colonizing a little tiny thing so you can launch from there to Mars.

Would you ever sign— if you— would you ever do one of these, uh, rocket launches like, like, uh, what's-his-face that the Amazon, uh, did? Jeff Bezos, right? He sent some people up. Would you ever do that?

I would, yeah.

Really?

Yeah, absolutely.

Wouldn't you, Willie?

I think, I think I probably wouldn't.

That'd be cool.

You wouldn't puss out like a day before and go, well, hang on.

I wouldn't pay for it. I never pay for it.

Right. Yeah.

Well, nobody paid for it. Did those people pay for it?

Only in dignity. On the Bezos one? Yeah.

Only in dignity.

The Bezos people, they pay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like $250 grand or some shit to go.

Really?

Oh my God.

Yeah, yeah.

That's crazy money.

You know, you can go up and like leave the atmosphere and come back down.

Yeah. To feel weightlessness. Wouldn't that be fun to feel like—

I'd love to get Neil deGrasse Tyson back on just to finish that answer he was forming for me. I know.

And then I think it's all pretty cool. I mean, I'm not obsessed with it, but I think it's pretty damn cool.

Yeah, they had some toilet problems on the Artemis too. Did you read that?

Yeah.

Yes. I had a toilet problem this morning.

Let me tell you something, Jason. Jason, you could never go because they don't have a shower. Because they don't have a shower next to the toilet up there. So you'd never be able to go.

You can't shower immediately after a BM?

No.

Well, I'm out.

Yeah, of course you're out.

I gotta feel fresh, you guys, as I explore the universe. Can, can you use a flushable wipe up there since there's no flushing?

I bet, I bet, man.

Yeah, sorry.

Wait, you know what else though? But I've been watching that new documentary, the Bob Lazar S4 thing.

No, what's that? I like a new documentary.

Yeah, so you got to see it. Uh, Bob Lazar, you know Bob Lazar, who worked at Area 51 and has been talking about it for decades and nobody believes him, and he's like, I keep He has drawings, he has memories, it's fascinating. And he's—

What's the book?

Uh, it's called—

Never mind, we'll look up at—

It's called S4: The Bob Lazar Story.

Okay.

Oh, go ahead, sorry.

No, keep going, I'm just prompting you.

So yeah, so he went into—

Sean, hurry!

I know I'm hurrying. He went into— he used to work there and there was this long hangar of like of different sections with different parts of alien spacecraft.

I like getting him—

I mean, I'm literally sweating.

So there's a long hangar?

Yeah, no, there's a hangar with different sections, and each section has different parts of alien spacecraft that they've collected over the years.

Yeah, that's exactly— yeah, that, that doc we were talking about— I don't know if we were talking about it on the podcast or away, but the Age of Disclosure. Yeah, James Clapper and John Brennan, they're talking about— yeah, like, that's— yeah, we have been doing crash site recovery for Yes, forever.

And Bob Lazar's been talking about it way before they have.

And, and now I said, well, to myself, self, why don't we know about all this in a much more mainstream way? And the answer is, is simply it would be too unsettling and disruptive to society.

Like, I think now it's slowly coming. I think now it's slowly coming out because I think we can handle it now.

Do you think we're helping by having like little conversations like this? Absolutely.

This is, this is having a major impact conditioning the public. This is, this is helping turn the tide.

Not us holding their hand into something unsettling.

People would be shocked.

Us just having this sort of really loose anecdotal conversation where we can't even remember the names of the goddamn documentaries is having a real effect.

And not even know that Mission of Artemis 2—

yeah, well, you know, listen, um, uh, this is all good stuff. Talk about a segue. I, I think this fella might have a nice perspective for us on this. Now, this is, uh, today, uh, it brings us a voice of the current, the relevant, the forward, and the fresh. Okay, this comedian, artist, and media entrepreneur was born in Egypt, lives in New York, spends his time delivering us one of the most viewed and talked about online interview shows around. His work has gathered billions of views, achieved acclaim from New York Times, GQ, New Yorker, Vanity Fair, as well as receiving multiple Webby nominations. Please welcome not a fancy schmancy triple A-list celebrity type, you two, No, no, this is a man of the people, a voice of the happenin', a guy with some helpful hot takes, the host of Subway Takes, Mr. Kareem Rahma.

Oh, please.

Hello.

Aliens are real. The truth is out there, right?

Do you, do you, do you think there's a, there's a chance this is, um, this is a real thing?

That we're going to the moon?

No, that we're gonna, we're gonna do a lap. That part's true. We're in mid-lap right now.

No, I mean that, that like we're go— like that that the rocket's even in space. Who knows if it's even in space?

Oh, oh, let's go all the way back there.

What do you mean?

Kareem, what are you saying? Are you—

Do you think that maybe we filmed the landing on the moon in a soundstage?

Look, I am not a scientist, but I saw that the curve of the rocket, like when it was going in space, kind of looks like it's not going up, it's going into the ocean. I'm just saying, I saw one video about this.

If the arc continued, it's going to plummet.

No, it's just going to go into those.

No, no, no, short—

a short social media video is all I need.

I think, I think, I think that arc is to offset the rotation of the Earth, and it's actually—

it looks like it's going straight up, but it's not. It's going against— it's going with the curve of the Earth.

But the Earth is flat, so that makes no sense.

Okay, thank you for joining us.

I'll see you guys there. Um, No, I don't believe it. Disclaimer, I don't believe any of that. I believe in the real world is round.

So you do— you don't think there's any possibility that there is, uh, life outside, uh, Earth, or, or sort of intelligent, uh, uh, beings, um, and that, that perhaps they may have crashed on this Earth a couple of times and that the government, um, is aware?

No, I fully believe that. I had— I've had extraterrestrial experiences. I'm surprised none of you guys have.

Welcome back to our episode.

No, you guys haven't had extraterrestrial experiences?

Well, we, we, you know, no comment. Let's hear what— tell, tell us yours first. Yeah.

Now see, now it sounds fake, but I saw an alien in the bushes when I was a kid, like probably like 12. And, and I just saw it and it just looked at me and it said the word zone, Z-O-N-E. And that kind of just like said that like a couple times and then it just ran away.

Was it the classic almond-shaped eye, uh, and head, teardrop head kind of thing?

It was similar to that, but not as exaggerated. It was more like— it looked like— it just kind of looked like a weird-looking— maybe it was a weird-looking guy.

Yeah, yeah, it might have just been a neighbor. Was he small?

Yeah, it was small. It was a small, weird-looking guy, but he was kind of green and, and big, huge eyes. I mean, it looked like an alien that you think about.

And when he said that, do you feel like he was telling you, like, like, get in the zone, like, lock in?

Like, it was encouragement, like, hey, yeah, get in the zone, study harder in school.

And yeah, yeah.

Now, all right, so then, uh, All half-joking aside and all that, um, you— would you be— would you be surprised if there was a mainstream, uh, declaration from, from the government that we have in fact— we can confirm that this is more than a possibility and kind of get ready for this multi-year kind of trickle rollout information to, to really make this legitimate and substantial, like, like they're here?

I think the impact on society— I think it would destroy society. I think more so than like anything else, because I think religion, like—

yeah, no, it would be gone. Science would be gone. Yeah, but, but like, what, what about what somebody said last night that, you know, there's But what if there's a possibility, let's say, that there's a group of wise men there in the government that is trying to figure out the best responsible way in which to condition the public to this inevitable reveal? And that, you know, Steven Spielberg's next movie, it's coming out the end of this year, is called Disclosure. Like, it's going to be an enormous film. And it is about, from what I can gather from the trailer, the public finally being told.

And it's probably funded by the CIA. I'm not even kidding.

And I'm saying maybe this group was— they pulled Spielberg in and said, hey, listen, could you help us out with— could you cover the pop culture end of this and just start to—

We need you to feed that, like, give the pablum to the people so that they can kind of—

They're not so ambushed when it comes out. And it's—

I think people, no matter what the news is, they'll just keep scrolling. I mean, there could be aliens among us right now. They'll just keep scrolling. I think that's the conditioned.

You don't think it's gonna— it won't jar them out of it and they'll think, no, that's probably not real?

I don't think so.

No, I think people will like seek out alien porn and like they'll, they'll do like weird— like it'll be more—

porn is always on the cutting edge of everything. They always— they're always first on everything. I mean, even, even engagement with, with, uh, with, you know, ghosts and stuff, it's always porn.

It is. Porn's always first. But I think that this movie is probably crazy timing and like, and the, and the launch Like, I do think the CIA's— I sound so insane. I probably sound like the most insane guest you've ever had.

No, no, no.

Okay, good. Okay, good. Okay.

We haven't aired those, but—

But I think that the CIA has been known to use, like, movies to, like, promote, like, "Oh, we're going to war in the Middle East." Yeah.

By the way, they would always do— you know, the government would make film. They would decide what kinds of films should be made at times when we were stuck in the war. Yeah. And to sort of, you know, to garner support and get people— lift people's spirits and get them feeling patriotic. And that's not new.

All right, so, um, mister, where, where, where, where to begin?

Where to begin? I mean, yeah, how do we claw back?

You're— let's start— start us— take us— walk us towards— we— you know, you're now sort of this, uh, you know, one of these forward voices in pop culture today. Um, how How did it all kind of start? Was this a goal? Like, you started in Minneapolis, yes? Mm-hmm. You got a journalism degree, maybe? Yes?

Mm-hmm, yep.

And then a business degree?

Yeah, that was a failure. I didn't finish that.

Okay. And then you travel out to New York in pursuit of?

Just not living in a small town. It was really a classic, and it was kind of like a, like, let me go out east and like strike it, like strike gold in the same way that, you know, there's a Silicon Valley rush and the gold rush. I was like, oh, I'm gonna go to New York, I'm gonna get rich and famous. And that was a long time, that was 15 years ago.

So any industry you had focused on, or it's just like that, that town has a lot of different ones, we'll see what hits?

I, at the time, I was very much into like entrepreneurship in this, like, The Social Network had just come out.

Okay.

I was like, oh, like, that's like, that's like, that was cool. Remember for a while that was really cool. It was really cool to be like a tech founder. Right. And I was like, oh, that's the way you do it. And all these young people were like making so much money. And I was like, oh, I think I should be a tech guy.

Right. Take technology, use your creativity, your insight, your savviness, and see where the two could intersect. Yeah, well, but really the ultimate goal was to strike it rich.

Yeah, it was, it was definitely in pursuit of— yeah, yeah, I was like, I was like, let me— and I did the opposite. I did the exact opposite because I got a job at Vice. Yeah. And Vice pays you— it's like they get 3— they get a 3-for-1 deal, so they get like 3 25-year-old kids, they pay you in cocaine.

Is that what you're gonna say?

They do, they actually do, at least Holiday bonuses were paid in— I remember Christmas, it was like, here's a bag of blow. And I was like, oh cool, this is so cool, this is so interesting, but I, uh, could I pay my rent with blow?

Um, so you're at Vice and you're doing marketing stuff with them, maybe?

Yeah, yeah, I'm doing like content development and marketing and kind of like launching new shows and And I was never the talent, but I wanted to be the talent.

Were you working with, like, Shane and Eddie and all those guys?

Yeah. And at the time it was like 75 people. So we were all in the same room.

Yeah.

And I was listening to them on the phone and I'm like, whoa, this is so cool. Like, it really was like getting— that was a real MBA in business because I'm like sitting in this room with Shane and Eddie and Saroosh and all these guys. I'm like listening to them.

Saroosh, I love Saroosh.

He's awesome. He's such a good guy. Like, I just saw him the other day.

He's the greatest guy.

He's so cool.

He's so cool.

Well, from a marketing standpoint and also a content thing, I mean, that was such an exciting company and hearing about it, seeing it coming and getting on board and kind of following it was— you guys did a great job at that.

It was really cool. It was really cool. And it felt like we were doing something like— it was like—

and Spike was around a bunch there too, wasn't he?

Yeah, he was. Yeah. Yep. He was like the executive creative director, which meant that he just, you know, got to say that. And I— he would hang out, like, he was just like that, which is— I was like, that's such a cool job.

David Cross was kicking around a little bit too, wasn't it?

That was early. That was early days.

I think that was earlier.

Yeah.

Okay.

No, I was there in 2012.

Yeah.

Um, and then— and from there you go to The New York Times?

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And, and for them you did less coke, I bet.

I did the same thing. A lot less coke. A lot, a lot less coke. Yeah, it was kind of like— that's why I quit. The Times was like, we just pay money. And I was like, yeah, you're like, money can't buy coke.

It's Christmas and I haven't seen my blow yet. Did I not perform this year?

Emailing the editor-in-chief, I'm like, hey dude, um, I'm gonna quit unless I get like a little bonus here.

So what were you doing for— what'd you do for New York Times?

I was doing the same thing. I like helped start Times Video, which now makes film and television and kind of the podcasting and all that And, um, and it was really cool. But then I, I did— so this is like, I think I was like in New York for like maybe 7 or 8 years. And at that point I was like, okay, I know enough people, I have enough information and knowledge and like maybe some access to money that I can actually go start my thing, like my media company, my own media company. And that was a massive failure. Uh, but I did do that for a couple of years.

What was that first, uh, swing and miss?

It was, well, there was like a couple in a row, but it was—

It was a long at-bat.

There was a, yeah, it was, there was like, it was 3 strikes. It was 3 strikes and then I was out. And that's when I was like, maybe I'm not so good at being like a CEO or an entrepreneur and maybe I should just be like, do what I'm good at, which it seems like hanging out, like I'm really good at hanging out and like, you know, podcasting is just really, you guys are just hangout guys.

Yeah, just interviewing, having conversations.

Oh, we're hangout kids. For sure.

Yeah, so I was like, maybe I should try my hand at that. But the first swing and a miss was something called NYC.TV. And the idea was to do public access television on the internet.

Right.

Which I was like, that's a clever little something something. Yeah. And it just didn't work. And then I shifted that into something called Nameless Network, which was like, do you remember like NowThis News? Like these, they kind of like made like, thousands of viral videos every month that would be like, "This guy is selling yams in Japan on a street corner dressed as a cat." You never saw like videos?

No.

They were like short, like 2-minute videos and it would just be like big text on a screen and it would be like, "This school in Turkey is offering free haircuts to young people." So just like, I mean, real attention grabbers.

Yeah.

I mean, stuff that's really mattering to people. Yams in Japan, haircuts in Turkey. I mean, and you're telling me that this did not take off?

And we will be right back.

And now back to the show.

So then a few swings and misses, and then you say, well, maybe I should just grab a camera and a microphone, get in front of it. And start doing what comes natural, which is just kind of being a man of the people and see what comes. So what was that first thing that kind of grabbed and then you could feel the momentum moving and this may be working?

The first big hit was a show that I created. And this is a time when there was like no shows, like there was no short-form, unscripted vertical video shows. And I say that and it was just like everyone was making content, but there was no like show in, in this thing, right? And I, I— but I decided to make a show, and I was like, why isn't there just a TV show that's distributed on TikTok and Instagram? And it was called Keep the Meter Running, and it was this concept where I would hail a cab and just tell the driver to take me wherever they want. And it was always insane, like, it would just be so crazy. Like, one time I—

so the taxi driver, the taxi driver has it flipped on, on him or her where they're not being told where to go by the person in the back, but you get to take me, the passenger, wherever you, driver, want to go and just keep the meter running and tell me about why you like this place.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just go take me to your favorite place and keep the meter running. And I would end up like one time I ended up like in New Jersey on a helicopter with this guy from Morocco and he was literally just getting in driving, drinking, drinking and driving.

Really?

Yeah.

Wow.

But yeah, he had a pint of Malibu, which I thought was an interesting choice. That is an interesting choice.

It's the white bottle.

Oh, it's smooth.

Sure.

So you do that. So you do the keep the meter running for a while.

Yeah, I do like 20 episodes.

And still going?

Yes. And now I'm back.

Meter's still running on this?

The meter— well, I had to stop because at the time it was my first thing and I was a massive failure, remember? And I had no money. And those episodes were— obviously, when you tell a guy keep the meter running and he goes, let's go on a helicopter ride to New Jersey, by the end of the day, you've spent literally $2,000.

Sure.

Right.

Yeah, yeah.

And so I could only do— I spent all of my money my money.

Oh my God.

And then I was like, I have to put this on pause. And then I was like, and, and now it's back except bigger. Now it's like YouTube. It's like 20-minute episodes. Sure, right. It's crazy.

I'm so surprised. How do you get them to— because I know a lot of cab, um, drivers that I— when I— the cabs I get—

oh, do you, Sean?

You know a lot of them?

They don't.

No, they, they don't want to talk.

What?

Yeah, they don't want to.

What?

They don't want to talk? Just not Sean.

Oh, all right.

Sean, what do you mean?

Well, maybe I don't. Maybe I don't know.

They're usually on the phone and they want to just keep their conversation going on their phone.

I just assume they want— I just assume they don't want to chat.

Oh, they love— You can't tell them to stop talking.

Especially when you got the camera going, right? They hang up.

Yeah. Just maybe just bring up like, just be like, so how about, you know, like politics?

Medallions.

No, don't bring up medallions. Don't bring up medallions.

No, I'm just figuring that that's a real hot topic.

So what was the first sign that that people were watching, um, Keep the Meter Running? How did you, how did you find out?

Legitimately the next day. So like, I posted the video and I turned my phone off because I was like, another failure. I was conditioned to just fail at that point.

When you say post it, what, what did you throw it up on?

I put it on TikTok and Instagram.

Okay, uh, of which you, you had already some followers, um, but not a lot, like 30,000, you know. And so, yeah, enough to like Yeah, for them to then send it out to their folks, and that's how viral happens, right?

But then—

Hang on a second. Walk us through that, JB.

Granddad is just stuck.

I can't wait to hear your understanding of how the fuck this is understood.

Isn't it an exponential dissemination of—

I noticed you didn't say the word algorithm in that. You actually said that the friends—

I save that for later.

Oh, yeah.

That's his closer.

It's such a great idea.

So you put it up and you turn off your phone, you turn on your phone, phone later that night and—

well, I go to the bodega the next morning and at this point I just did— I turned my phone back on but I didn't log— like, I didn't open the apps. I went to the bodega and the guy goes, oh, you look so familiar. And I go, I don't know, I'm a loser, I've been here a million times. Like, I've literally been here. I look familiar because I see you every day, right? And he goes, no, you look so familiar. And then he goes, taxi! You're the taxi guy, you did the show! And I was like, what? And I opened my phone and it has like 2 million views.

No way, in a night?

Yeah.

And so many, like, like thousands of comments. And I was like, holy shit, it actually worked. And it felt like that moment where I was like, yeah, I did something that for the first time ever people responded to it and it was doing exactly what I thought I could do well, which is hang out. And I was like, oh my God, like maybe I'm, I'm finally found my thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, I called my mom. I was like, I know what I'm going to do for a living. I'm just going to hang out with other people.

And so you immediately tried to, um, double down, triple down, have another episode.

Bought a Ferrari first. Bought a Ferrari that morning. This is gonna pan out.

Yeah.

What, what year now? You're— the, the, the new episode, the, the new season is premiering, uh, soon. It's the 19th, right?

May 13th.

May 13th. I think that's in, uh, I think this is the 11th. 10th today. I think it's in 2 days. Uh, so what season is that?

This is like the first official season of my— I'm bringing my thesis of making television and putting it on YouTube, but like, it's not a YouTube show because it is television quality production and television storytelling. And like, we have, you know, I went to like the Russian Turkish bathhouse with a guy named Eugene and his friend.

We'll get into that later. Let's talk about the show.

That is the show!

Oh, oh, oh, sorry.

And, um, you know, do that. I'm producing— I produced a play for an Irish cab driver named Irish John. That's not his name, but, you know, I call him that. And he goes, "I have a one-man show." And I go, "What's this all about?" So he takes me to his basement. He shows me this one-man show. I go, "Cool, let's put it in a theater." So, you know, performing in front of 300 people, all self-produced. Looks like a stand-up special, and, you know, go fishing with a Korean guy named Young in Bear Mountain and sketch. And just, it's really remarkable. And the whole kind of through line of the show is like how to be a better man, like how to be a better brother, how to be a better father, how to be a better friend. It's all— because these guys have like the secret to the universe in, you know, like you're driving for 12 hours a day. Your life is hard, you're sending money home, or you're just supporting your family. And they like have this fatherly wisdom. I don't know if any of you guys lost your father early. I lost mine when I was 20.

And I started like having these convos with these cab drivers because I felt like they had some advice for me.

Right.

You know, and I didn't have Will's number yet, so I couldn't call him. I couldn't call him for advice.

Sean didn't lose his dad. His dad got lost.

Yeah, so this is true.

So, so wow, that's, that's really remarkable, man.

Yeah, that's really cool.

And then, so then, uh, tell us about, uh, then Subway Takes happens. Uh, you, you feel you get, you get an idea for that and you figure you can do it at the same time simultaneously?

I had run out of the money because the other show was costing like $2,000 per episode. And so I was like, okay, this is, this whole like short-form unscripted thing is like really working for me. What's like another version of that which is less expensive?

And again, like, sorry, sorry, let me just stop you for one second. Educate me and our listener because it might— this might be fascinating. It certainly would be to me. How do you run out of money doing that show? Um, because I guess the question is, how do you monetize a show like that? So you put it up on Instagram and TikTok. How, how, how were you even thinking you could get paid for that? How does, how does a creator get paid for that? Can you advertise against those little shorts.

Like, the guy made you— he sees your first episode, it's got 2 million views overnight. Are you seeing that in real time in dollars coming to you?

No, I'm seeing zero dollars. That's right.

That's, that's my question. How would you even hope to monetize that? How, how would you get paid for that?

You, you would want, like, a brand to essentially say, I love what you're doing, hey, do you want to pay— in every episode, do you want to use your Chase debit card or credit card, right, to pay for the cabbies? Or do you want to— yeah, or do you want to communicate using WhatsApp exclusively with like their families and your friends? So you'd want someone to underwrite the series in the same way that like a streamer or a production company or a network would underwrite. It's, it's a brand-funded entertainment.

But so you were pursuing that and getting no bites, or you just didn't know to do that yet?

I didn't know to do that yet, and I also was like so overwhelmed and just kind of— I was in panic mode. Like, I don't know what to do with this, you know? I don't. And, and actually, the first thing I did was like, I was like, okay, maybe this should be a TV show.

Yeah.

Instead. And like, I should get money from someone in Hollywood, right? And but that whole rigmarole, yeah, uh, I went on like a wild goose chase with that. I was like, I don't know, this is— yeah, it was taking too long. And in the meantime, I was like, let me start another thing while this is baking in the TV world. Let me start another thing to kind of like continue my work.

What made you think that second thing would be something that you would be able to monetize and get money out of?

I didn't really think about that either. It was really more so like—

like, I'm really noticing a trend here.

Yeah, this is, uh, you thought—

I— you thought, I'm not making any money with the thing, this thing's costing me money, what I should do is interview Jason Bateman on the subway holding a MetroCard instead of a microphone. Phone.

That'll do it.

It worked. I'm here.

It did.

I love JB. I loved your episode.

I thought you were—

oh man, I did too. What a fun time I had that. You guys, if you guys have not seen Subway Takes— and I haven't seen Keep the Meter Running yet. I can't wait to watch that.

Me too.

I need both of you guys on there.

Tell people what Subway Takes— what the concept of that is.

So Subway Takes is essentially like a 2-minute talk show on the train where I interview like local stand-up comedians, regular comedians, musicians, writers, directors, like all— anyone who I find kind of interesting. Um, and also like people like Jason Bateman, right?

So then you— and then you had Jason on. Yeah, it must have—

yeah, you can't appreciate the big ones unless you get a couple of, you know, clunkers.

I found him kind of interesting. I was just like, he's kind of interesting. Worked a miracle in the editing room.

Yeah, interesting. I'm curious about the, the details of No, but the concept— your episode with JB. Well, okay, concept, but I really want to know what station did you guys get in? Yeah, let's— what, what did you guys do? What train were you on and where did you get—

we were Lower East Side.

Yes, we were in Chinatown on, on the F train at East Broadway. Wow.

Yes, I had to boil my entire body after that.

And you, Jason, you— I mean, what was— Jason, the look on your driver's face when you said, take me, take me there. What was it?

He said, let you out here? I said, no, no, no, hang on, just keep the door closed for a minute.

Jason, Jason brought an extra pair of pants and an extra shirt.

And some plastic to sit on.

He called it his train clothes. That's what he called it, his train clothes. And he was wearing white latex gloves.

And I was like, why are you wearing—

why are you wearing those?

That sounds right.

I love the train. I miss the MetroCard.

So you— so you go— you decide, all right—

So, but the concept is, listener, is that he has somebody come on and just give one hot take on something. Right. And Kareem decides whether he's 100% went on board with that or in opposition to that. For instance, my dumbass hot take was, I think all dogs should wear shoes.

100% agree.

And he 100% agreed. But, but then, then the interview is, well, why do you agree? And why do I think— basically, I, you know, I just think, you know, that so that, you know, they, yeah, you know, you don't want them to walk into your place and track in all the poo they like to walk around in.

Yeah.

Um, so anyway, um, but, but so that's, that's kind of the concept, and it's, it's a, it's a 2-minute concept and it's pleasurable and we're popping around the city.

And you think dogs, if dogs go to a play, they should go backstage and see the artist? Sorry, we'll get into that later. Yeah.

Uh, but Kareem, can we do a hot take to you? Like, because I, I just thought of this when you popped on about that show, and I was like, doing Broadway shows, you know those rickshaws that are super fucking loud?

Yeah.

At night?

Yeah.

Like, shouldn't there be a law against the sound, the sound of those?

100% agree.

Yeah, there's too much noise pollution.

Oh, Sean, is this our segment called Old Man Gripes? What are we doing?

Yeah, I'm—

shouldn't those damn kids slow down in the neighborhood?

No, he's right. Yeah, too damn loud.

You're so synonymous with New York. I just thought, you know, what do you think about— like, because I don't have— I don't have any skin in the game with Maldani. Like, I don't— I don't know if he's good or bad or anything.

I don't live—

you know, I'm I'm just here part-time working. But somebody complained that it's because of Mamdani that the snow banks weren't clear. I'm like, there's no— when there's a blizzard, there's never— you can't clear all the snow.

Yeah, where do you want them to put it?

Yeah, well, you gotta— but being the mayor of New York is the worst job in America. Yeah, because everyone's just mad at you no matter what you do, right?

Of course, for sure.

It's a historical big L. I would never do it, although I might.

Have you ever had somebody that—

uh-oh, have you ever had something about breaking fucking news?

Um, I would, I would only do it as a joke and then I would accidentally win, like, you know who, our boy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, whoopsies, I'm the mayor now.

Just trying to sell a book. Um, what, uh, has anybody come on and not had a take and then you had to say, all right, well, I'll do one?

Well, didn't you go through the vetting process, Jason?

Yes, yeah, yeah, I was, I was given a heads up and, but you know, I'm a, I'm, I'm, I'm a professional. I came prepared. Don't you love someone But you have some of these people come on and just like, yeah, I couldn't think of anything.

And then you see if Jason Bateman had any other ones that we didn't use.

Yeah, did I? Oh, did I pitch you some?

I don't know, let me check my email. So this— they go to someone on my team.

Yeah.

And, um, and then, and then I don't— there's like somebody approves that they're good, right? And, uh, and then, and then like just some Gen Z kid. Yeah, pretty literally, literally a young, young young lads.

Which, uh, what's the last one you disagreed with?

Oh dude, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. You're doing one—

what are you doing, one a week?

No, we post one a day.

No, what?

I post one a day. Yeah, it's mental.

So then you're doing one a day to keep up with the output?

No, I batch shoot. I shoot— I'll shoot like 10 in one day. No, and it's really a miserable day. It's an awful day. I'm like a real— I'm like a real working, you know, blue-collar guy. I'm underground all day. I'm sweating or it's too cold or it's too hot or the train's not working or somebody's trying to stab me.

Or I'm walking—

Yeah, it's really hard.

Don't you find that— Am I just an introvert or—

Lunch pail guy over here.

Am I just an introvert that needs to refill my talk tank a lot? Or does everybody go through sort of like a social exhaustion like me sometimes? Like, how do you not run out of being— You know, chatty by doing 10 episodes in a day. How do you keep it going like that?

Will's raising his hand.

Well, I've got a thought on this, which is always— You know, when you go and you do interviews and stuff, doing what we do, and you have to go on talk shows, and when I realize that I don't have stuff to talk about, it's 'cause I haven't been out in the world. And so a lot of people we know, including us or whatever, spend these times in these— in this world, and we're not out in bubbles, and you're not engaged in a real way. And in about 50 years ago—

So you don't create stories for yourself.

I would say, like, I gotta, like, I want to experience— experienced life. And, and that, that's why I, I'm always on the move and doing shit. I swear to God, I know how boring that is.

So you're out there walking around with your fucking hands tucked in your pockets, just like squinting around town.

One hand. How the fuck do you think I'm soaking it all in?

Hey, good morning, man. How you doing?

Have a good day, huh? No, I'm serious. I'm not saying that I'm a— I'm not saying that, like, I'm more down to earth or anything. What I'm saying is that I realize You have to get out there. Sean and I have talked about this a number of times. And Jason, you're a lost cause because you're at home or in the golf course. And so like, that's okay. How the fuck would you have anything to talk about?

I could fill you in on what MS Now's new programming strategies are.

No, but it is true. I think that there is something to that, right? Just being engaged. I don't care who you are, just being engaged in the world.

Having stuff to say. I get it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is that true, Kareem? Is that your fuel?

No, I mean, I'm having fun. Like, I really am having a lot of fun. I have such a fun job. Both of my jobs.

You're great at it.

Hanging out with cab drivers, hanging out with people like you guys. Like, it is the— I'm blessed as a person. Like, I have the best job in the world, and everything that I've done thus far has been totally independent. So I really have no notes. I have no development. Right, right. I'm just doing the fun part of the job. My job, which is the making of it. And that's all I do. And it's really amazing. And I have a lot of energy.

That's how we feel.

Amen. What would 5 years from now look like if it continued on this angle of success? What's your hope for where things go with this? Like, well, go ahead.

I really don't know. I mean, I'm kind of just playing it by ear.

Orient Express. Just upgrading the train line.

Yeah, or gondolas, yachts. Do you know Leo DiCaprio's yacht? I could just have a permanent spot on there.

That would be pretty good.

That could be fun.

You just talk to him for 10 episodes.

Yeah, I could.

Yeah, that would be good. Well, no, I, I talked to his wonderful guests, so I'm sure you guys have been on his yacht.

Yeah, I'm not, but like, but, but I imagine, I imagine, yeah, kind of going of Jay, what you were saying, which is which is like, you do have— I love that you did identify what you term as hanging out is actually engaging with people and talking.

Yes. And being curious.

And that's what you like to do, and that's what you're good at, and you're curious, and you do have a point of view on a lot of stuff, which is great and interesting. And so I guess would the next— the evolution of that is taking that and going— and you talk to cab drivers and doing the thing, take me where you want to go, and then talking to people on the subway. And then would it be kind of going broader, going around the world, engaging with people in different cultures? Yeah.

Yeah, I imagine you'd be really good at exposing all of us to other parts of the world and other cultures of people.

Yeah, that's a great idea.

We need that.

Well, but you know, the Keep the Meter Running feels like, like a Bourdain-esque, like people have said, this reminds me of Bourdain. And Subway Takes reminds a lot of people of a talk show like Fallon or Seth Meyers or whatever. So like, I kind of get to play in both worlds and that's really cool. We're doing a live show for Subway Takes Live, which is really fun and interesting to me.

Really? How would that work?

People come and do what you did, except it's like the audience is giving the takes, and then it's like a panel. Like, it would be us 4 onstage, and people would walk up to a mic and say—

Oh, that's cool.

I think this, and then we would all go, "No, you're an idiot," blah, blah, blah. That's a great idea.

Yeah. Have there ever been some dust-ups there on the train? 'Cause I remember, you know, we were riding on— We didn't have a shooting permit or anything like that. We were just on the train. Cameras were rolling, a couple of cameras, and these, you know, you know, two guys holding these weird mics and talking, and somebody might be recognizable. And have you ever had, like, a weird subway passenger, like, bother you and your guest?

Not with anyone— like, with anyone famous, it's always a pleasure to see. Like, Woody Harrelson was literally kind of— took over the train car, and he started interviewing other people, and there were all these people, like, and he was just surrounded by people and just putting this mic in their faces and asking them questions.

Yeah.

And really creating a circus, like, in the, in the car. And everyone loved him. Yeah.

We'll be right back.

All right, back to the show.

The timing of this, of, of that concept and you and doing all of this is really great because we're, we're at an apex of, like, people wanting to connect again. And so it's probably—

probably has a lot to do with that, you know, and the lost art of conversation too. I mean, everyone's kind of getting all their itches scratched, uh, just online and with their own little devices and in 5-second increments. Yeah, they're not talking to people.

And, and that's why I always think that the 100% agree, 100% disagree, like there's no middle for me, right? And it is really an, uh, kind of like a an exploration of what it means to 100% disagree but still have a funny, casual, engaging conversation. Like, I personally don't really have that many opinions. Like, I'm pretty mellow. But in the show, it's like, it's a challenge for me to be like, "Well, here's why I disagree." But it's kind of a showcase that you can— [SPEAKING CHINESE] Yeah, like, have fun doing this. But there was one funny thing. It was like a regular episode that I was filming, And there was a passenger on the train filming us film, which is completely fine, like, great. This other guy on the train slapped the phone out of that guy's hand and then kicked it across the car all the way to the other side. And then that guy that got his phone slapped out of his hand looks at me and he's like, I'm so sorry, dude. And I'm like, why? And he's like, your bouncer just kicked the phone out of my hand. And I was like, that's not my bouncer.

That's just a crazy 'Hey, guy, that for some reason decided that you shouldn't film me.' And there was like this confusion where everyone was kind of pointing at each other like, 'Whose bodyguard is that?' Or like, 'Do you guys know each other?' No one knew each other. It was really funny and like confusing. But that's the closest call.

Did the guy who slapped it, did he ever explain his position as to why he did it?

No, he would just yell something about like Jesus and walked away.

Oh, that makes sense.

That So, uh, wait, but I wanted to ask Will— Will and Sean, what would your take— like, if you were on the show and I said, what's your take? What would your take be? Well, we know Sean's— something about rickshaws.

Oh yeah, Sean said the rickshaw. Yeah, yeah. Willie, uh, what's, what's, what's, what's about New York?

Like, no, no, like, I— one of my— one of mine is that I think that the dancing part of the wedding is the worst part.

Like, I didn't even do it.

It should be dinner.

I didn't dance with my wife on our own wedding because I hate dancing so much.

I didn't know that.

That?

I don't know that. Is that true?

Yeah, I, I, I— that's how much—

at that moment, it's not about you.

I'm so uncomfortable dancing. I, I know it, but I just— I told her early on, I said, baby, that is profoundly unkind. I, I, I know, but I just— I, I, I couldn't— I couldn't do it.

I'm calling Amanda— I'm calling Amanda today, and I'm going to take her out dancing.

Yeah, go, go for it. I encourage it.

Go for it, please.

I encourage it. That's so— that's a hard line. Like, but I was saying not at your own wedding, Jason. I'm saying like, you're saying at any wedding, like it should just end at dinner. Like you just go have a great night, everyone. Like, thanks for coming to the wedding.

I 100% agree with that.

And then it's always a forced thing. The DJ's like playing like Lil Jon and the Eastside Boyz from like 2002. And you're like, dun dun dun dun. And no one wants to be there.

Yeah.

And yeah, so that's like, or like I have another one, which is that I think, and this one I think will be problematic, but like, I don't like street art and graffiti, and I would rather just look at like nice, beautiful buildings.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, that's a good one.

But a lot of people are gonna get mad at me for that. What, really?

People are great defenders of graffiti?

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, street art, graffiti.

Aside from the people that actually do it, you're saying people that just observe it are big fans of it?

I think so. I think that there's a cohort of people that think that it's like, it's nice, yeah.

I enjoy it, yeah.

See, I have too many, but all of mine get me in trouble. All of mine are terrible. First of all, I think I should be deputized to be able to give out just to the parking part of the police department. I'd love to give out tickets.

Oh, you would love to give out tickets.

I'd love to give out tickets and also moving vehicle tickets.

That's a good idea. Citizens, you can have citizens do that.

And I also think that we should be able to report when, like, you know, like when, like, the cops who do a great job, but when they pull people over and then they obstruct traffic and it's unnecessary.

Yeah, they don't need to hang out into the other lane. I mean, I guess they're doing that to protect themselves as they're up at the window, but why don't you go around to the passenger window and then you don't have to—

I don't even mean on a freeway or anything. I mean, I mean like on a regular street, especially in New York, you know, when you're in New York or— but although I am— so I don't want to criticize NYPD because I do, I do, it's a rough, tough job, but it would be nice if they deputized us to give out maybe 3 citizen tickets for moving violations a month.

Month, you know, so you can't, you can't abuse it. You just get 3. So the, the 3 most egregious things you see when you're driving, you're allowed to put the little Kojak light on, on top of your car and go get them.

I think it would be nice if you could also get Sean's, like, if Sean wanted to ticket the loud rickshaw guys. Yeah, he could give, like, we should all be active citizens. Like, why don't we have—

we all have phones and we're taping people anyway, we might as well be able to use it too. But then I thought about, here's, here's the flip of it. I was thinking about this yesterday and I'm like, how many yellows have I squeezed while driving through an intersection? And I'm not immune from it myself. And so then I kind of walked it back. But I have so many takes on shit.

I do too. Wait, there's two that I just don't have. One is, I don't know if this is a fake post on Instagram or not, but I read that New York is looking into making a law about— looking into making it a law to traffic the sidewalks like they do the streets so that fast people, walkers, walk on the left and Which I think is really a great idea.

New York is a bummer when people stop in the middle of the street and you're like, hey man.

And also, people walking 4 wide on a sidewalk so you can't get around people.

Like, 4 wide's crazy.

If you're a group of more than 2, you have to go kind of 2 by 2, kind of single file.

Here's my hot take. Here's what I think. If you want to post anything on the internet, comment, whatever, anything, We have to know your name and your address, your phone number, and your face.

Your face.

No anonymous.

No anonymous anymore. And I think that would— I think it would— I think it would change the world immediately.

Immediately.

I think so too. If everybody— you have to— there is a record. And we know that they can do it because, you know, things like the blockchain where you can trace absolutely everything, where you know everything. So if we applied that same logic to that, so you can't go on to anything, you can't make any comment, you can. But we know your name, your address, your phone number. And by that, we'll be able to decipher where you work, who your family is, all that sort of stuff. And you are held— so that— because if I make a comment, everybody knows who I am. And so then I get, I get held up to this crazy high standard that everybody else is not held up to.

Yeah, but wait, here's, here's my other take, is Jason commented on me the other night when we were at dinner that when you order a dessert for yourself and then the waitress comes over with spoons for everybody at the table.

Yeah.

And you're like, wait, no, everybody passed on ordering dessert. I ordered dessert, and when offered, everybody else like, no, I'm good, I don't want any dessert. And then everybody spoons the shit out of your fucking dessert.

Good.

I'm like, no, get your own dessert.

Right.

Good dick.

Unless—

if you did not opt in, you don't get a spoon.

Unless it was specified, bring us the sundae and bring everybody a spoon.

That's right.

That's right. Otherwise, no, don't, don't.

That's good.

Shout out to Odeon.

Remember we had that? We— so we did have that the other night at the Odeon, right? And I was— oh, well, I ordered this. I started because I said I want to, I want to get a sundae, and it was like, oh. And I go, everybody gets your own dessert. You're not fucking— that's right, that's right.

You have to announce it.

Yeah, I don't want you dipping in the fucking butter sauce.

And Jason, Jason was like, don't get the donuts. I got 2 orders of donuts. He'd fucking— his face was buried.

I had 6 of them. Now, Kareem, with all of this really cool, very well-deserved success What has changed in your, I'm presuming, very sort of down-to-earth, man-of-the-people life? What have you— have you, uh, Will joked earlier that you like upgraded your air conditioner, right?

Yeah.

Or is it still taped to the window in red tape?

Oh, look at that. Um, don't worry about it. Well, that's another— that's another big take that I have. When I was installing this, I was I was like, it is shocking that they let me do this in New York. And if I'm taping mine, yeah, that means that they're— and then I started looking around. Yeah, there's like people that their air conditioners are being held up by books, right? Some people have a little piece of wood, and I'm like, there's not a standard process.

I agree, I agree.

Yeah, there's a guy over there that has a, like, a couple of textbooks. I can see, I'm like— and it's so scary because now I can't walk around New York City without thinking about my own self.

Sure.

Putting in my air conditioner. And you guys obviously see how good of a job I've done. I know.

I remember, I remember, Cream, the first time I put an air conditioner in my window in New York and thinking, this is freaking lunacy. This thing could go at any time. I just did this. I'm an idiot, and this thing is going to fall on somebody and kill someone.

And it's not like the windows are nice. The windows are flimsy. The windows are flimsy windows. They're made out of Saran Wrap essentially, and, and it's just terrifying. And there's no screws, none of this. There's no tools. No, this is just like the windows holding in.

So you haven't— so you haven't gone to main— uh, mainstream air conditioning. Um, what, what have you treated yourself to?

I mean, I— there's a lot less anxiety in my life about what I'm supposed to be doing for a living, and that is really scary because I also started doing this when I was 33. Which is later than many people— like, many comedians or these social media kids, you know, they start when they're like 22, 21, 25. They've, they've— they were in their college improv group. Like, so to start at 33 and take like this massive bet and then have it work out, it's shocking. And every day I'm just like, it's dope, it's dope.

But I'm shocked.

It's not shocking. It's not shocking. You're a smart guy and you are really funny, and Do you refer to yourself as— when people say, what do you— you don't say creator, do you?

No, no, no, no. I say entertainer because I also make— I wrote a movie, produced it, starred in it. That's out on MUBI. I make music. I'm in a rock and roll band. The movie's called Or Something.

Or Something.

And it's a feature film. It's my first feature.

And we can find that where?

On MUBI. M-U-B-I.

MUBI. Okay. That's like Tubi.

I want to ask whether or not—

Do I have MUBI? And then you say you're in a band too? No.

Yeah, I'm in a rock and roll band called Tiny Gun.

That's amazing.

Are you singing? Are you drumming? Are you guitaring?

I sing.

Yes. Wow.

Yeah, and it's kind of like a, like a punk, like Pixies, uh, we love Pixies. The Pixies meets The Strokes kind of situation.

Yeah, speaking my language.

Give us a listen. Tiny Gun. Hondo P. We played Outside Land last year. We played Outside Lands in New Newport Folk Festival. It was really fun. Yeah, do you guys hear those sirens?

Yeah, it's hard not to.

Yeah, they can excite your air conditioning.

Well, yeah, that's a ticket. It's Sean. It's Will and Sean.

Sean on this rickshaw.

Um, it's Jason Bateman on his motorcycle.

I'm so— honestly, I'm so inspired by how much different stuff you do and how many creative swings. That's really cool. Once— I think it's awesome. I think that is you're doing the very thing that I, that I was talking about that I wish I could do more. You're taking chances and you're engaging in life in such an awesome way. I think it's dope as hell.

Some cultural relevance and help to it.

It's amazing. It's amazing.

It's really cool.

You guys are— that's— that feels like it's so— it's such a compliment coming from you guys.

No, but you're not catering to the lowest common— like, you're trying to do something not necessarily sort of worthy in the sense of like, you know, helping humanity, but you are in a way you are sort of engaging and keeping conversation going and provoking thought and just— I don't know, it's— I think it's really rad.

Bringing folks together.

It's just that— it's that classic playing at the top of your intelligence situation, which I feel like because so many people are not doing that, I was like, let me just be a little bit different and try to— try to be the smartest version of what I— this thing limits you to, which is a phone, tiny screen. Vertical, like, let me try to do the smartest thing possible.

And you're not prancing around in a Speedo, you know what I mean? Trying to see—

you don't want to see me in this video.

Where do I find that? And selfishly, you're giving us ding-dongs that are like promoting stuff this really great, fun, creative, uh, stop on our, on our, on our press tours to go talk to folks.

Yeah, I want, I want to have you guys on.

I want to come too.

I wanted to I would have all three of you on at the same time.

But here's the thing, Jason did it. I want to do just, just to one-up him, obviously, of course, double that.

Of course, double that.

Double that.

4 minutes.

No, let's get you out. Let's get you next time you're in New York. I'm there. I'll be there all the time.

I live there half the time.

Great, then I will do it at literally any time. Like, I'll step out of the house, you know.

Can we take the 1-9? Is that okay?

Yeah, I was gonna say, what would be your subway?

What the hell is that?

You know, like, what do they call it? The 1 now? It used to be the 1-9 on the, uh, on the west side. You You know, the Red Line.

I've never been over there. Really? I'm an East Side guy.

We can do the East Side too.

It's like, no, no, no, I'll come to you. I'll come to you.

No, we'll take the 6.

That's fine. Oh, no, no, no, I'll come to you.

Fuck it. I'll take the F. I don't give a shit.

Wait, I also want to say something that— So I— This has nothing to do with what we're talking about, although it kind of does. But like, going back, I don't want to tout— flute my own horn. Toot my own horn. Toot my own flute. I don't want to toot my own flute. But I want to say this here in case anyone from the Emmy Emmy. What are they called? The Academy?

Sure.

Yeah, we're going— Subway Tix is going for an Emmy.

Is it?

Okay, so for your consideration, for your consideration, uh, great Subway.

But wait, but does it's got to be on the telly?

I love that. I love that you just said that.

No, they have little ones now.

Tiny Emmys.

Tiny Emmys for your boy.

Isn't that called a Webby?

No, it's a creative— the Creative Arts Emmy. You can get a Creative Arts Emmy for like short form. Yeah, like, like, you know, it's a bit— it's a lot like, like, like, um, like Carpool Karaoke, right, is a winner.

Or the, or the dude with the hot wings.

Yes, uh, Sean Evans from Hot Ones.

So, so, okay, so, so, so, Kareem, to be clear, if, if you, if you happen to be listening to this and you are a voter in the Television Academy, please watch— please check out, uh, Kareem's show and consider Yeah, thank you.

Then what tiny gunna listen to?

Guys, I'm still out here doing this. I'm still out here shilling for myself. I mean, no one else is gonna do it.

Good for you.

I have this opportunity. Let me, uh, let me— I want to see you guys there, first of all. And if when we see each other there, we should hug.

Oh, at the Emmys?

Yeah.

Oh, if we're at the Emmys, we're gonna hug like hell.

Yeah. It's all hard.

That's a phrase, right? Hug— I want to hug you like hell.

Like hell.

I mean, it is though.

Oh, that was a really— that was a really good take about men, is that we haven't standardized our greeting. So like, I might go up to Will with a hand up in the air, like, what's good, man? Good to see you. I might extend a hand to Jason, and then he's— and it's confusing. Or I hug Sean, and it's— yeah, and it's really confusing. We need a standard.

My buddy years ago, Ali Farnakian, used to say, you always You always start Road to the White House, which is just a handshake, and then anywhere you want to go after that. But you always start Road to the White House.

This is good advice. So you extend the hand.

Always extend the hand. Road to the White House.

Be open to getting pulled in.

And then wherever you want. I always loved that.

You should consider driving a cab. That's really good cab— like, that's kind of cab driver advice that I get.

Hey, man, it might get to that.

Kareem, we are thrilled to have you. We love you. Root for you. We're watching you. Keep it going, my friend.

Thank you guys so much. This was really, really fun, and I appreciate you guys letting me be on your show. Seriously, I'll see you. We will see you back here in the city.

We'll see you on the show.

I'll see you on the show. I can't wait for it.

Thanks, Cream.

All right, bye guys.

Have a good day.

Thank you so much for having me.

Yeah, shaking your hand. Goodbye.

Digital shake.

There he goes. Kareem.

There he is. He's good. He's so good. Kareem Rama. Yeah, dude, really great dude. I love it. Sean, he didn't invite you on the show.

No, that's right. Yeah, I noticed that right there at the end. You know what I was thinking?

I think he's worried about your safety. I think that that was it.

By the way, I've never rode on the subway.

Hang on a second.

So maybe I'm trying to do my—

I'm trying to do my 'I can't believe that' face. I'm trying to— hang on.

Sean, that's true, isn't it?

That is very true.

Yeah.

Is Is that really true? Never once on the subway in New York City?

I mean, if I did, maybe once 25 years ago, but I don't remember it.

It's not on purpose? It just hasn't happened?

I just don't feel— I'd just rather take a cab.

Oh, so it is on purpose? Yeah.

Oh yeah, it's totally on purpose. I don't even know how they work. I don't even know where they are.

There's so many— I will give you— it is a hack because you spend a lot more time in New York these days. If you have to, it can get anywhere in like 2 seconds.

But now it works so much with your navigation app, like Waze or Google Maps or Apple Maps, whatever it is. You can just say, you know, how do I get get there via walking, via, via car, or via subway. And then when you hit the subway thing, it'll, it'll give you a little map how to walk to the subway, what to do.

But it's overwhelming to me because there's— aren't there like 75,000?

But it tells you—

it'll walk you— yeah, it'll tell you what to do if you don't know it. It'll tell you what to do. And, and I'm telling you, you can save yourself hours of being stuck in a freaking car.

Or it's so good and it's so safe. Like, what is this?

All right, well, that's a little bit of a—

yeah, it is Great.

All right, we'll do it together because I love riding on them. We'll do it next time I'm there. All right, we'll hold hands all the way through it. Um, but you guys should check out those two shows.

Very good. Yeah, I will.

I, I've seen a couple of his clips on, on, uh, Instagram, and they're always funny and engaging. Like, like you said, Jason, it's—

he—

it's really interesting that he's— well, you both said it— that he started something out of, like, you know, who would have thought that just conversation would be interesting to people.

Well, I will say this. I think that there probably are, Sean, a lot of people who think like, hey, I'm interesting and I could just do— I'm going to do a talk show or I'm going to do a thing. And the truth was that he did have an actual talent for it and that he is an engaging person.

And he's very authentic and real.

Very authentic.

Yeah. You know exactly. Yeah. You just know who he is.

Yeah. And I bet he could do it. He'd probably like— you'd take it on the road. He could go overseas. He could do it. He could definitely do one. In, uh, in Egypt because he was born in Egypt. So I'd assume that he is bilingual.

Very good. Bye.

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