Transcript of Paul Bissonnette Talking Four Nations, People Are Mad About Lebron Ruining A Picture, Is This The Worst Sports Stretch? Hot Seat/Cool Throne + Guys on Chicks

Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Ariott started out 30 years ago by revolutionizing cowboy boots, making them as comfortable and easy to wear as athletic shoes. Now, we apply that same innovation and performance know-how to industry-leading work boots and workwear. We develop and test both in the lab, then out in the real world, on real job sites with real workers. Bottom line, these are seriously comfortable work boots and workwear that do the job so you can do yours. On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Paul Bissenet getting ready for the Four Nations final on Thursday. We also have a call to action for the AWLs that we will discuss during the podcast. We're going to stream the Four Nations final. Come on now. We have Hot Seat, Cool Throne. We If guys on chicks, might have to go into a Supreme debate. It's all brought to you by DraftKings. Hey, basketball fans, are you ready to win real money? Check out Picks 6 from DraftKings when it comes to basketball payouts. Draftkings Picks 6 dunks on its rivals, including prize picks.

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Okay, let's discuss. Three weeks from now, your favorite week of the year starts, which is conference Championship. Correct.

Starting a little later this year, which bummed me out when I was looking at the schedule.

It sounds like you have no respect for the window where teams can designate who they're going to get the franchise tag to.

That was part of my argument that I was looking at stories today, and the biggest two stories I could find is, will T.

Higgins be franchise tag? Well, they've declared that he will.

Yeah, and his mom being mad about it, but then walking it back.

We don't know because his mom said, Selfish Bastards on the Everything app. Then people were like, Oh, this is obviously about the bangles because the news had just broken that they planned to franchise tag T. Higgins. Then she said, No, it's not about the bangles. It could be anything. She could have been watching Severance. Then this milkshake bastard, he sucks.

No spoilers. Great show, though. Great fucking show. Have you caught up, Hank? No.

Okay.

I would like to- I wish I didn't say that.

I would like to severance my own brain after football season's over.

I was actually thinking, Severance, we should have a severance for flights. Yeah. That would be great for travel days.

Although that's the time that I used to catch up on Severance.

True. I guess you just watch Severance while being severed.

Yeah, you only think about severed.

Because then you can watch it again and it's while you're watching severed. All right, so the T. Higgins, yeah, and Will Sam Darnold, Will Trey Murphy. Basically, franchise tags are at the top of the list. Then the other big story I saw was people mad about LeBron ruining a picture in All-Star Game.

Which is fair.

But that's okay. I don't want to- He did ruin the picture. We should discuss the merits of that accusation, but that was when it clicked in my head, I was like, This is what we have right now. I know that people will argue the All-Star break in the summer for baseball. My counterargument would be, It's summer. You can go outside and do whatever. It's these 2-3 weeks where we haven't gotten to March Madness, because then once we get to March Madness, then it's Masters, then it's NBA and NHL playoffs, then it's summer. By the time we get to July, it's like football is about to be back. I think these are the worst 2-3 weeks of the entire year right now.

I do enjoy the Combine week.

But that's specific to us.

Because there's all the rumors. That's when you can really play fan fiction with everything. Correct. You're like, what if the Jets changed their mind about Aaron Rodgers?

We I like going to combine week because it's something to do and we get to see some people we haven't seen and do a couple of interviews. I agree with that. Next week is going to be fun for us. But I'm thinking for the common man who doesn't go to combine week, I remember getting excited for the combine and then watching three 40-yard dashes and been like, What?

This is stupid. And the players opt out now, too. Back in the day, at least everyone cared about the combine players. Who's going to win an island? Yeah. Now, it's like the best players We rarely even do the contract.

No, really. The only story is out there, there's some baseball news, but again, it's all contract news. This is a great week if you care about numbers. I agree with you. There's not a lot of action going on right now. Thankfully, we have the Four Nations.

The Four Nations saved us, but this is the bummer week where I would like to be severed these couple of weeks and just wake up and have it be March Madness.

We also have the news leading up to the draft where you start to get interviews with certain players that are going to be in the draft where they say, You will regret not drafting me. Every team that passes on me is going to regret it. Kam Ward said that he pulled the Josh Rosen.

Josh Rosen, nine teams made a mistake.

Made a big mistake by passing on Josh.

Turns out only one team made a mistake.

It was the 10th team. Yeah.

Is Josh Rosen? I think he's like a doctor now.

Yeah, he's not doing much.

I mean, that's something.

Yeah, there's a lot of doctors.

He's doing okay with his life.

They give anybody a doctorate now. Hank can get a doctorate.

No, I think he might be lawyer. Doctor over lawyer in terms of Steege. You all just intellect I respect.

It would be very funny if he became like- He was a Josh Rosen doctor in Chicago.

I don't know if that's what you're thinking. No.

You should have him on the show.

No offense to lawyers, but you can read good. Yeah, I could argue well.

I think that he should become a film guy, a draft breakdown guy.

Yeah, like a Kurt Benkert.

Yeah, he's like, I know the game better than anybody. I can identify a boss. Yeah.

All right. Oh, so he's in business school. Don't respect it as much as a doctor. That's not... He is in business school. What? What are you laughing about?

He just bailed on the switcher. He was like, You have to tell him that he's in business school.

No, you don't.

It just didn't have to be said.

He had to type it on the computer.

He was just on his phone. It really didn't. But it's just not something that needs to be brought to their attention.

But they were like, I'm a doctor.

Yeah, maybe these three weeks, we should do a buttoned-up version of Pardon My Take where we get no facts wrong.

No, I don't agree to that.

But that's what Meves is just trying to do. Who the fuck cares if it's a doctor or a business? Who cares?

Isn't every school a business school?

Business school is a complete racket, by the way. You basically pay so much money to go and meet a bunch of people that then you can use to get jobs. It's not like you're learning anything. You're just meeting people who also are in business, and then you use those connections. You're paying for connections.

No, you learn how to avoid paying taxes the money that you will make eventually.

That would be, yeah. That is a good thing. But yeah, we're in the dog days, boys. We're in the dog days. What is it? Good choice by Max to go on vacation.

Yeah, great choice, Max.

Wow. Great vacation week, Max.

Memes I was reading up a little bit about the post-June first designation, too. That's how bad things are, is I'm looking at clauses and contracts now. That's what they're going to do for Aaron Rodgers. It's essentially just saying, pretend that we let you go after June first, but you're not a part of a team anymore.

Yeah, and announcing it allows teams to talk to Aaron Rodgers.

Yeah. It's like if a girl breaks up with you with a post February 14th designation, but she really breaks up with you in January, she's like, I'm going to stick around for the gifts. Yeah. But I'm also going to cheat, but just so you know, this is done. Yeah, he's gone. He's gone. He's gone.

Would you like to talk about the LeBron picture?

Yeah. They're mad at him because he was not wearing the historic and the notable O He's Jersey.

I did like those jerseys. They were cool. They reminded me of whenever the All-Star Game was in San Antonio in the '90s, and they had those awesome jerseys. I do understand he could have just stood on the side because people were saying, Did Kobe- Or he could have just thrown on the jersey. Or he could have just thrown on the jersey.

Or he could have said he wasn't going to play beforehand, so they could have replaced him with someone.

That also. Selfish. People are saying he was doing a silent protest.

He's tanking. He's going to start his own league.

The theory is that in LeBron's mind, he's been unfairly blamed for ruining the All-Star Game, so he was like, Fine, I won't play. What a protest.

He's been blamed for ruining the All-Star Game by not playing hard in the All-Star Game? Correct.

It's the LeBronification of the NBA.

Now he's ruining it further by not playing in the All-Star Game.

He's silently protesting. Okay. Yeah. And then there was a picture war going on. For people who didn't see it, which I hope you didn't, because that means you have a normal life and you're living a good life and not getting into arguments about LeBron's pictures of the All-Star Game, it's the O'G. It's the O'G's, so it's Kyrie, Harden, Kevin Durant, Steph, Jason Tatum. He was on team O'G. Jalen Brown. Who else is in it? There's one other. Dame. Oh, Dame. They're all in their jerseys, and LeBron is wearing street clothes, and he's standing in the middle. Then there was a picture war because Kobe missed a couple of All-Star games, but Kobe was standing off to the side when he did it. They were like, You guys weren't mad about this. Then people said, Well, actually, Kobe did it the respectful way. He looks like a coach, not like he's standing in the middle and making it all about himself.

It's the definition of stop trying to fit out and start trying to fit in.

But he said to Luca has stopped trying to fit in and start fitting out.

Show the picture instead of the video. But yeah, this is where we're at on the sports calendar. This is, yeah, there it is. He's right in the middle. He is right in the middle. Okay.

I'm going to be honest with you. Lebron Don James ruined this picture. He really did.

People were photoshopping him out of it. It did look a lot better.

This picture is so bad. This is one of the worst sports-Pull up the Kobe one.

One of the worst sports pictures of all time. Yeah.

How long would it take him to get changed in that jersey?

Or just stand... If he had just been sitting on the other side of Dame, it wouldn't have looked as weird because it just would have looked like he was a coach.

But he's LeBron.

But he's LeBron. Also Steph Curry.

Steph ruined this picture, too, with two different-colored shoes.

That's cool. That's hip.

No, I don't like that. That's how they do it. This is It's a terrible picture.

Yeah, it's the worst picture ever taken. Also LeBron.

Can we Photoshop Hank's face on LeBron? The one where he's looking at the camera after doing the workout.

Can you show the Kobe picture? Look at this. This is how you do it respectfully, guys. It's just in all the replies of the LeBron picture.

It's also hilarious that Kyrie, James Harden, and KD were just on the same team.

Yeah.

That's a good picture.

See? Kobe and Brandon Roy look like coaches.

Yes.

It's great because Chris Kamen is getting just a nice bump of like, Oh, yeah, you were on the All-Star team. Chris Kamen's best picture, by the way, if no one's ever seen it, was the time when he was on the horse and he was taking a huge piss and had a... That's enormous dick.

Is that Chris Paul that's fronting to the right on that? Is Chris Paul sitting on a stack of phone books? I don't know.

He did look extra tall.

Why does he look huge in that picture?

Chris Kamen is spelled K-A-M-A-N, Max. Oh, casual over here. Big time casual. Look at that. That's my tweet. Look at how big that dick is. Oh, man. But yeah, so we're in picture gate. Also, LeBron I don't know how you fucked this up, but he somehow fucked up the timing of dunking on Doug Gottlieb. And dunking on Doug Gottlieb is the easy... It's basically bringing the rims down to 5 feet. You don't really have to do anything dunk on Doug Gottlieb, but he quote-treated Doug Gottlieb had said, earn two, not given. Got to give him credit, though. This was because Doug Gottlieb's Green Bay basketball team, college basketball team was 2 and 24. Lebron tweeted this 12 hours after Doug Gottlieb's team won their third game.

Yeah.

So he missed the window. He missed the boat off. They were a two-win team for two and a half months.

Yeah. I mean, good for Doug Gottlieb. Lebron's giving him credit. Usually, Doug just takes it.

Yeah, that's true. I'm I'm pretty sure Doug Gottlieb also said he was like, huge win, 15 more to go, which counts winning his conference tournament and winning the NCAA tournament.

I've noticed something about our good friend LeBron James. Aside from ruining pictures, LeBron James steals tweets.

Oh, yeah. Dude, I had- That's why he's behind on this algorithm was because he saw people talking about Doug Gottlieb, probably on the For You page, where it was a tweet that was a day, maybe two days old, and then he stole that take.

He's been stealing takes left and right, and they're all about 24 hours on what everyone's talking.

I don't know how to phrase this without having people be upset. Kobe dying was tragic.

Correct. Go on.

One of the things we lost when Kobe died was LeBron didn't know what his opinions were on a lot of things. I think he had a lot of, I'm going to wait for Kobe to tweet something, and then I'll tweet the same thing. I think I landed that well.

Jason Tatum might be the same way. That's our good friend Jason Tatum, by the way, Hank.

Did dap him up, told Hank the story he was in the Bahamas. Daped him up and said, Hey, my boy Hank, can't believe he was on the duck boat, and he laughed.

I gave him one of these. A little nod, real cool walking by. Should have asked him for a picture. He gave me the...

I didn't want to ask him for a A picture.

Too much aura.

No, it would have been like, what is it? When a ghost takes a picture or a vampire?

No, it would have been like...

It's just a picture of me. People are like, Why did you just take a selfie from... He's not even there.

If I had asked him... Nice guy, though. If I asked him to flick up real quick, I would have taken that picture and everybody being like, damn, Jason Tatum ruined this picture.

I know Big Cat saw Jason Tatum and made it a point to go dab him up.

I did. Yeah. And I mentioned you. Yeah, I appreciate. I literally, that's the only thing I said. I was like, Hey, Big Cat from Barstool. What's up, man? How are you doing? Then I was just like, Still can't believe Hank was on that duck boat in the Zula. And he laughed. And that was our entire interaction. That's awesome. Yeah. For you. I know. Yeah. All right. What else is- Rafael Dever's interview was very funny. Oh, yeah. What happened there, Hank?

He just said, I play third base.

Yeah. He was told he's not going to be moving positions. Then Alex Bregman, who the Red Cubs just signed. The Cubs came in fourth for it in terms of money. Tom Rickets is so cheap. But so Rafael Dever's, he's now going to have to move positions?

Not according to Rafael Dever's.

He is a third basement.

That was so clearly just a guy who doesn't understand English that everyone was taking.

Can we see it? Yeah. Where would he move?

The outfield. I think he has moved positions before.

I I don't understand when anyone's like, I don't want to move to first. I would rather play first and third.

I like the idea of him saying, It's not my job to tutor a young guy and show him how to play third base. It's Alex Bregman.

Yeah, Alex Bregman.

All right. You'd imagine Divers would be-Wait, hold on. Herefull-time DH.

Dh would rock.

I would absolutely take that change. That's just my position.

How would you react if they asked you to DH?

How would you feel about that? No. I can translate that.

That's it? No, the follow-up was... They were like... He was just like, I play third. It was, I will not DH. I play third.

I love that.

When he asked to play, DH said no.

Can you expand on that?

I played third.

There it is. That's it. That's all I wanted to find.

Yeah, I played third.

I like that.

Stick to your guns. I played third. I mean, what else This is proving my point more.

Mark Cuban brought that fan back courtside. Oh, nice. Yeah, the guy that got ejected. Okay. So now everyone's like, Well, is everyone on the Jumbotron now going to say, Fire Nico? I hope that happens. Yeah.

The more and more that has come up because there's been a couple more articles, it literally just was, Nico did not like Luca.

Hank has a take. I recognize that face.

Oh, let's go.

He grinned, and then he shut himself up, and then he grinned more.

Well, it's not It's not fleshed out, and I haven't been fully locked in for the past couple of weeks, but the LeBron picture, and I'm trying to write my conspiracy theories ways, but I saw LeBron picture, ruined all of our game, failed in the team, ruined the picture.

And you love All-Star Game. You always loved All-Star Game.

The report came out a few, like a month ago or whatever, that there's rumors about this new league that LeBron might be starting, which would tank the NBA. What if the NBA forced Luka to the Lakers to basically force LeBron to stay? Because the Luka thing still doesn't make any sense. Lebron is clearly doing something. Something's going on where he's protesting or he's got an ax to grind in some way, and maybe The NBA knew about this internally, and they tried to send Luca to LA to somehow stop LeBron from doing what he's trying to do.

I don't think that's going to stop him from doing what he's trying to do. But Hank, I do agree with you that the NBA has bent over backwards, I guess, bent over forwards for LeBron for the past, I guess, 15 years. And now he's going to leave the NBA and then start a rival league to the NBA with Saudi money and all this shit. And it's going to be very funny to see how the NBA reacts to that after the guy that they've given everything. I don't know how the Luka thing fits into it, but we need to explore all possibilities. So I like that your brain is going there.

Yeah, I like the theory. I read an article that Nico Harrison... I think Nico Harrison clicked on a tweet Luka's slander tweet. We always talk about it.

The Luka's a cone.

Yeah, the reply guys are like, Yeah, like Lefraud, no real championships. He clicked on one of those with Luka being like, he's a traffic cone, blow by, and then that's his whole algorithm. Because he keeps saying defense wins championships when I'm pretty sure that's not what happens in the NBA these days. Luca basically carried them to the title round. He just hated him. It's He just hated his guts.

It is good to have a defense wins championships guy, though. Oh, yeah, but you don't want him to be- I like him that guy, right? Probably not leading your team in the NBA.

You want him to be an old assistant on the bench. Yes. You want him like a white-haired guy who just sits there with a whistle in his mouth never blows. He's like, Defense does win champions.

Yeah, you want a guy that's going to get your guys to play like 1% harder defense. Yeah. Ultimately, superstars win championships. Guys like Luca, guys like Jalen Brown, all these Yeah, all these guys.

Thanks for listening. I listen. Yeah, okay.

All right. Should we do Hot Seat, Cool Throne, and then we can talk some hockey? Oh, we should do our last thing. We need to find a Canadian. This is actually very important.

It is an eye-opening experience for us to realize that we don't have any Canadians at work for us. Bad job.

Bad job by us. Here's the deal. We're going to stream the Four Nations final on Thursday night from the PMT Studio. We would like to invite a single AWL Canadian. I think this person probably has to live in Chicago, but where are they emailing their application to be? We want the most Canadian guy possible. We don't want an asshole Canadian. We want the nicest Canadian in the world.

Someone who's not afraid to show off their Canadian spirit.

Yeah, but I don't want a Canadian to come in and try to...

We might have to do some, I think we'll send the email, then we might have to do me and Max and the boys might have to do some pre-calls tomorrow to try and flush them out.

What I'm trying to say is I don't want a Canadian to come in.

I know what we're looking for.

Yeah, I don't want a Canadian to come in and be like, Oh, this is my moment. I got to talk shit back to these guys. I want a Canadian to come in and just be themselves.

Yeah, if you're a Canadian. Yeah, pre-existing evidence of you being a solid Canadian would be good. Nothing that you've created specifically for this moment.

Maybe someone who, if we can timestamp it, apologize for the booing of the national anthem. That would put you at the top of the class.

Or if you're a mountie, a mountie would rock.

It's probably got to be in the Chicago area, or at least you can get here Thursday. But we're looking for one Canadian to come and watch the game with us for the stream so that we can say we have a Canadian. I'm excited. Where are they going to send the email?

Pmtbachelerparty@gmail. Com.

Okay.

That's just a completely random email.

Obviously, we're We're going to have to fact check because we don't want any fake Canadians trying to skirt through. We're going to have to ask for some documentation. And yeah, explain to us in three sentences why you would make the perfect Canadian to watch this game with us. Yeah. I'm excited. Very excited. We're going to find a Canadian.

Can't wait to beat the fuck out of Canada on Thursday.

Yeah, I've been thinking about it, and I have talked a lot of shit. I don't know if I'm going to go phone hacked or Wi-Fi doesn't work. I haven't decided what- What the fuck? What if we lose?

We're not going to lose.

Why are you thinking like that? I'm just making plans.

No, this is bad mentality Big Cat Scott. What? If this was Max, Big Cat would crawl down Max's throat. That's insane. It is insane.

Yeah, I'm nervous about this game.

We're going to lose. You think we're going to lose?

No, I don't.

It's a must win. You're planning a loss.

I think we're going to win.

You're planning a loss.

I'm not planning a loss.

There's never been a bigger must win than this.

I'm not planning a loss. I've thought about what... I mean, do you You think we're going to kill him no matter what? All right, fine. Fuck it. We're going to kill him. Fine.

It's USA.

You're right.

We don't lose these games. The players don't matter.

We never lose these games. The flag matters. We've never lost these games.

We got the Tuchucks.

Well, I just had so many Canadians be like, See you Thursday. I was like, Oh, fuck. I forgot there was another game.

At least one K'Chuck is hurt.

I think Charlie McAvoy is also out.

Mcavoy is out.

All right. It's not even our best.

Yeah. This is our JV team that we sent.

Perfect. Correct. We're definitely going to still win, but we're going to do it with our JV team, which is crazy.

There's got to be... I need more fights.

Yeah. Need more fights.

Right off the bat.

Absolutely have to have more fights.

We were two and one in those first three fights.

I gave it to us two and one. I'd say three and oh. Easy 3-0. Okay, so send the email. We want one Canadian here on Thursday night to watch the game with us, and tune in. We'll do it from the PMT YouTube, which you should subscribe. We're over 600K now, but keep subscribing. All right, let's do Hot Seat Cool Throne, then we will talk some more hockey with biz. Hot Seat Cool Throne is brought to you by our friends at Chevy. Chevy has packed more capability into the Silverado Trail boss so that you can pack more fun into your weekend. Have yourself a Friday, Saturday, and Sunday with the truck that says no to nothing. Tailgate, spontaneous camping trips, DIY projects. Bring it on. What about a cross country road trip? Silverado was the perfect ride for last year's Grit Week out West. Recently, they helped us give fullbacks the recognition they deserve with the low man award. Well, the Silverado Trail Boss is built like a fullback. We're talking 495 pounds of foot of torque. Hold on to your sodas max. Plus, the Trail Boss gives you an extra two-inch lift, so maybe Hank can finally dunk.

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Great for rehydration. Get yours at Google 711 or an Amazon today. All right, Hank, Hot Seat Cool Throne.

My Hot Seat is flying.

Yeah.

Not a conspiracy guy. Thank God, you guys have righted my ways there.

What was the one that you sent us?

The microchips? Yeah. What was that? Allegedly. Again, this is where I think it's like you guys talking to me about conspiracies. It's gone to my phone and set up my algorithm that way. It's our fault. Yeah, agreed. So Baste Spin, which seems reputable. That's the name of the account. That's the account, okay. Baste Spin. Baste Spin. Got it. Someone spent $1. 38 million worth of Ethereum to tell the world that there's a Chinese-grade Neuralink, and it's had been mass implanted into their military and workforce to control them like bugs. Oh, okay. If that's true, that'd be bad.

That'd be really bad with planes.

No, the plane thing is just a plane landed, crash landed, and flipped over, and it was very scary.

No one died.

No one died.

Kind of crazy, right?

I mean, you probably can sue the fuck out of them.

The wings snapped off. Yeah. They were okay. I don't want to throw the pilot under the bus. The landing looked a little hard in my eyes.

Everyone seems to be saying it was the pilot's fault.

Could have been wind.

It just seems like these things are happening more and more and more.

Being in a plane crash where no one dies, though, rocks. Yeah.

It's like getting bit by a shark and surviving.

Big Cat sent that to me as I was on the plane, woke up, and woke up to them being like, We're landing in 30, 40 minutes. That's the first thing I saw. That's all I was thinking about. So you're nervous?

As we were nervous? Yeah. Would have been awesome.

I don't think so.

I think it would have been awesome.

I don't think I would enjoy that.

I think it would have been to be like, Yeah, I was on a plane that flipped and blew up, but I survived.

I was on a plane once. I got struck by lightning. Really?

What happened?

It was a super It was a super stormy day.

Okay.

Thanks for that context. It just got... All of a sudden, you just saw bright lights just go all around all of the windows, and you were like, What the hell was that? Then they got on the... Whatever, the flight attendant got on the thing and was like, All right, we need to do an emergency landing in Baltimore. Everything's going to be okay, but we need to land immediately. Then they told us after the fact that it was because the plane got struck by lightning.

Did the plane get hurt?

Yeah. No, the plane was done. Oh. It was good enough to land, but it was not... If we went any further, it would have knocked out some of the systems.

That's crazy. I've also heard that there have been a couple birds that have gotten sucked into the engines, like Sully. Oh, yeah, that's bad. But they're not bad bird strikes. But when they do hit the 737 max, it fills the cabin with smoke because the air conditioner pulls from the engine. We've had that happen a couple of times, too.

So not a conspiracy, guy, but Neuralink and planes are crashing.

Yeah, but don't worry about it. Just keep living, man.

I'll be honest with you. It is shocking that planes haven't crashed more.

They used to crash a lot.

When you're ever on a plane, are you like, Holy shit, this is crazy? Every time. A big tube of metal that's flying through the sky? Every time.

Yeah, I don't think about that stuff.

Yeah, no, you just keep living.

Yeah.

Comfortably numb. Why?

Why would I put that in my brain?

I feel you. Then my cool thrown-Maybe I have the neural Neuralink.

We did just wish for the neurolink when it came to eliminating the offseason.

Do you ever think about that?

Yeah. I mean, again, if you were a conspiracy theorist, you'd feel like that's- Would you want a chip in your brain?

If it made you way smarter?

No. Tortilla?

Way smarter. No.

What about severance? Would you choose to be severed? No.

If I could control it, yes. Imagine being severed and just going to work out.

I thought you were saying that if you control it. Then it just turned to do it. If Hank had a chip in his brain that we controlled.

Click was ahead of its time.

Click was ahead of its time. Okay, your cool turn. It's fine, dude.

Yeah, it's fine. Boston Dynamics, Robots, Neuralink.

It's fine. Ai. It's fine.

It's fine. Yeah, my cool tone is bachelor parties.

My take, though, Hank, is if it is not fine, what the fuck are we going to do about it?

That's what I'm saying. That's where I'm just like, whatever.

We're not in a spot where we can change anything. That's why you got to buy land.

We got a platform.

You got to just keep going.

That's why you got to buy land. Near water. And spinach, base spinach. Raise your own meat.

You just got to keep going. You got to become a liver kid. Keep on trucking.

That's what I'm saying. Just keep on living, man. Okay.

All right.

You're cool throw is bachelor parties? Bachelor parties, yeah. We're going through We were waiting till after the dust settled, but we're going through this week, all the submissions. Where can people submit? This is the last chance you have would be the next two days. We'll tweet the link again. Where can people submit?

Is it PMT Canadian?

No, that's the thing.

They're not having another email is unfortunate because we are going through.

No, it's not an email. It's not an email. It's a link.

It's a Google Sheet.

Okay, so we'll send that out. We'll put it on Instagram story and Twitter and stuff tomorrow.

Okay, because we haven't got enough submissions yet, right?

Well, No, we have- You want female submissions? We have a specific date range, so it's like a lot of submissions weren't inside of that. I just wanted to give people one more chance.

Okay, females. April. Bachelor Art Parties, count two.

If you're not in April, Probably a waste of time to submit.

Yeah, don't move it to try to get into April to get on this unless you're a bachelor party. All right. Good job, Hank.

Thanks.

Great job, Hank. Thanks. My hot seat is Kaitlyn Clarke. Again, more contract discussions, but her agent gave an interview where she said that Kaitlyn Clarke is so good at basketball that she'll never be paid fairly by the WMBA because the league just can't afford to pay her what she's truly worth. There's probably some bit of truth in that, that the league doesn't generate enough money where her salary will never be equivalent to what she brings into the league. But it's also the God paradox, which is could God create a stone so big that he himself could not lift it because he's all powerful, but then he'd be able to lift that stone no matter what.

So what's the solution?

The solution, I don't think there's a solution.

They just can't pay her.

I think the solution is just to remind everybody all the time that she's underpaid. Which I have a problem with because she hasn't won shit.

It's true.

Hasn't won any big ones.

Yeah, we did the hasn't won the big one draft, and she was on there.

She's never won a college national championship, never won a WMBA national championship.

These are all facts.

So I think that she's paid what she's worth right now.

She got to win the big one.

Talk to me when she's got a chip, when she gets that ring.

Max, are you upset with the Jalen Hertz discourse? Because it's like everyone Prisco is an idiot. Basically, the way we do the NFL is if you win a Super Bowl as a quarterback, that's really all you need. Except Jalen Hertz, everyone is like, No, he's still not.

It's unbelievable. I feel that the two most important guys in my life are Jalen Hertz and Joel Embiid, and they are just both the exact opposite player and both looked at the exact same.

Oh, wow.

That is interesting.

You think the exact same?

Kind of.

Minus the injuries. Yeah.

I think-Not in Philly.

Jalen Hertz has-No, not in Philly, correct.

A lot more respect.

There's been some takes this past week. Presco said that Dak Prescott's better, though.

Yeah, he did. I saw that. I respect that, though.

He was like, Jalen Hertz is a really good quarterback. Then whoever's social person asked him 50 quarterbacks, and he said that Jalen Hertz was worse than every single one of them.

Yeah, he had a tie with Trevor Lawrence, I think.

That was the best, was a tie with Trevor Lawrence.

Well, he loves Trevor Lawrence.

He does. He was not going to Pittsburgh.

Yeah, that's a weird rumor that just got tossed out there because number one, the Jaguars don't even have a general manager right now. Yeah. Number two, he has no trade clause. Yeah. So just erroneous in all counts.

And he's way too young for the Steelers to want them.

That's true.

That's the other part. Steelers are more in the Aaron Rodgers business.

In conclusion, Caitlin Clark is not overpaid.

Yet.

Until she wins.

Okay, you're a cool tone?

Yeah. My cool throne is steroids. Steroids on the cool throne because that guy, Yonic Center, the tennis player, you remember him? He was the subject of a big steroid debate a while ago. The World Anti-Doping Agency reached their conclusion. They said, Yeah, we'll suspend him for a couple of months, but he's not getting the three-year ban that we asked for.

Yeah, and he's also being suspended just in time that he can be back for the majors.

Yeah, it's interesting. His excuse was he had a cut on his hand, and his trainer sprayed something on there. They got into the bloodstream. Classic. Then the tennis people were like, Oh, yeah, the levels were exactly even with what he said happened. Now you've got guys like Jokowitch coming out and saying, We can't trust the doping agencies. No shit.

Wait, maybe this is what we do the next three weeks because there's no sports on. What if we see if we can accidentally dope Max? How many of these stories are true where it's like, we'll try to put steroids into Max without him knowing, and we'll have him take a piss test.

We'll catch his piss? Yeah.

I'm okay with that.

Okay, great. All right. Great. All right. So watch out.

Yeah. So there's that. Then the indoor mild-time record, world record, has been broken twice in a week. Now it's down to 3: 45: 15. Last week, it was broken down to 3: 46: 63. They're getting faster. At some point, I've always wanted this about 100 meter dash. When is it going to be the fastest that you'll ever run? Because the human body can only go so fast, right?

It's the tracks, the bounceiness on the track.

Yeah, but then also in the news was that organization that we talked about six months ago, the Enhance Games. The Enhance Games are coming where steroid use is encouraged amongst the athletes. I personally am excited about watching that, watching all those freaks out there. So in. If you go on the Enhance Game website, it'll give you tips on how to come out to your parents as being enhanced, like you're a discriminated class. It's a very funny website.

I like that. Max, you got to read up on that because we're going to get you enhanced and buy some steroids and just start putting it.

Not to my knowledge.

I would imagine it's not going to be hard for us to just put in a piece of cheese and throw it to them. Have him sit first.

I'll be.

You have peanut butter? When we give Max's daily scoop of peanut butter- Give me a Kong. One of these times.

Go in on it.

All right. My hot seat is working from home. I don't know if you guys saw this. Some guy who... What's the guy's name? I'm going to find the tweet. He's a big Wall Street guy. No, maybe Jamie Simons?

Oh, Dixon? Dixon. Jamie Dixon. Jamie Dimon. Almost got it. The guy from J. P. Morgan. Yeah.

He basically just was on a call just slamming working from home, being like, It's over. We're done with this. I actually agree with a lot of things he said.

Well, I would also like to see how many days in the last 10 years he's worked from his office. True. And how many days he's traveled.

But fundamentally, I understand working from home is awesome for a lot of people, but I do think that you lose. His point was more the younger generation is going to lose out, and I agree with that. Not working with other people and having the coalescence, I think I use that word correctly, of ideas and things going back and forth, you will lose out. It is different when you're on Zoom.

I think it makes a big difference what job you're talking about.

I think it's definitely an industry thing. There's different industries where it doesn't make sense and it's fine.

But any type of sales or you have to be together, I think you got to get back to work.

I don't know about sales because you have some salespeople that are just absolute killers no matter where they work from.

Yeah, but I think working around other people in competition, that stuff matters.

I do think that does matter. Yeah, but it depends on what industry you're talking about. He's not wrong. Yes, but he's not right. He's not right.

He's done. I'm going to say he's right.

I think a lot of people just took advantage of it and probably ruined it for most. I think in theory, working from home could work, but so many people just fucked off That's what I'm doing.

Which I would do, too, if I was working from home. Yeah. Okay. My cool drone is baseball injuries because we have one of the weirdest ones, and we've had a lot of weird baseball injuries. But Dustin May from the Dodgers He was rehabbing. I believe he was getting Tommy John, and he was coming back, and he was about to come back, and then he ate a salad, and a piece of lettuce tore his esophagus, and he had to get life-saving surgery that night, and that's why he was out for the rest of the year.

I'm never eating salad again.

Never.

How does that happen? What lettuce was this?

On the night of July 10th, while he was still rehabbing at the Dodgers Camelback Ranch facility in Arizona, May went to dinner and ordered a salad. After one bite, he felt lettuce stuck in his throat. Trying to wash it down, he took a quick swig of water. Moments later, he could tell something was wrong. In what may be described as a complete freak accident, he unknowingly suffered a serious tear in his esophage one that required emergency surgery that night, dashed any hopes him returning before the end of the season, left him with a new perspective on not only baseball, but also the fragility of life. He had a full abdominal surgery It's insane. I've never heard of anything like this.

I have to imagine that it got stuck, and then he coughed a whole lot. How does a piece of lettuce, unless it's frozen?

I don't know.

Shredded.

Hank, you're a throat expert.

That is going to be bad.

Yeah.

Recall.

This could happen to you, Hank.

No, I'm off silence, too.

No, but the... The throat? Yeah, the weed, the ashes. Could have burned your esophagus. You could have had He could have missed the entire baseball season.

That would have been bad.

It's a crazy injury. But we should maybe do a Mount Rush more of crazy baseball injuries this year.

Washing your car. If you're a baseball player, never wash your car, you might slip and fall.

Yeah, the old John Smoltz burned himself while ironing a shirt that he was wearing.

Scotty Sheffler was a baseball injury. What was his again? He was cutting a turkey.

Yeah. Glenn Allen Hill ran through a glass table because he was dreaming about spiders.

Yeah.

I think there was Joel Zumeya, right? He had the guitar hero. No, he had a guitar hero.

Yeah, a guitar hero.

He had a guitar hero fucked up his wrist.

There's been a lot of shower injuries, too. Yeah.

We should definitely do that. I started just looking up a couple of them. I didn't know this one, but Steve Sparks was a reliever for the brewers in the '90s, and he tore his shoulder because he tried to rip a phone book after he watched a motivational speaker do it. That's an awesome baseball.

Yeah, I love that. Yeah.

So we'll do that. But yeah, Dustin may, I'm happy you're alive, but this is why you don't eat sals.

Never eat sals. Never touch the stuff.

Never do it. Okay, let's get to biz, and we're going to talk some hockey with Biz, Four Nations. Get it riled up for Thursday night. We're brought to you by our friends at Reese's. Reese's are the absolute best. I got it right here. The all-new chocolate lava cup. Reese's peanut butter cups are the perfect combo of chocolate and peanut butter. Ries's peanut butter cups may be even more perfect with a layer of ooey-gooey, delicious chocolate lava. You can buy Reese's cups basically anywhere. It's lava time, baby. Try Ries's new delicious chocolate lava big Rees' Cups. Listen, Rees' Cups, right now, they're the best. I've had one pretty much every single day since they came on as a sponsor. They are so, so good. The elite candy, the best, the goat out there is Ries's. Then they went one up themselves with the all new Lava Cups. You can buy Rees' Cups basically anywhere. It's Lava time, baby. Try Reese's new delicious chocolate lava Big Cup. We're also brought to you by our friends at the Farmer's Dog. Listen, this is the year. Healthy habits don't apply to humans. Give your just to humans. Get your dog a fresh start, too.

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Us is better than Canada in hockey. You're our daddy. These are all his quotes to me. He said, I'd like to come on and just and Neil before the Kings before Thursday night, get ahead of it. So here you are. We're better than you.

Enjoy your round Robin win, boys, because Thursday night, we're going to put on a spanking to you Americans. You guys have been gloating. You've been calling us your 51st state. You're imposing tariffs on our country, and now you're trying to take our national sport. It ain't happening. Thursday night, you're going to see McJesus, Mccar, McKinnon, and Crosby put on a goddamn show in front of the Boston crowd. First of all- You hear me? You hear me, PFT?

I'm not saying you're You're 52nd. We got to get Greenland in there first, and then Canada. You can be 52. Puerto Rico. That's fine. We'll get to you guys in due course. But, yeah, let's talk about that shit pumping in the round Robin stage because we kicked your ass, biz. Admit it. Admit it was an ass kicking.

Both literally in the game, but also we beat the fuck out of you in the fights.

I would say that the fights were overall a draw. Let's not get carried away here. You guys were the antagonizers. At least two to one. Hey, listen, let's get serious.

We antagonized you.

Oh, you want to go? I thought this was hockey. You want to have a go? Is this hockey? You want to go?

Yeah. You want one? No stories coming here, boys. No stories in here. All right? But let's get serious for a second. Usa Hockey is coming, and it's here to stay with the amount of development that's going on with the way the NCAA game has evolved, the NDP. I think it's called the National Development Program that they have out of Ann Arbor, which they have under-16, under-17, under-18 programs. Of course, World Juniors. Some of those guys are already playing college who end up playing World Juniors. But you guys have won back to back Under-20s, which is the World Junior tournament. Gold both years. So there has been a resurgence of hockey in America. A lot of Canadian players, and this is not to take credit. This is not to take credit. A lot of Canadians who have played in American markets have stayed and helped out with development in the Minor League program. So it is going to continue to evolve. Big Cat, don't make that face. I am not taking credit. I'm saying it's a good thing for the sport growing in the United States of America, and there's 330 million people here, and it's starting to get the respect that it deserves because of all the work that a lot of people have put in.

So shout out to the USA. You guys got some players, not quite to the level of McDavid, McKinnon, and McCar, and Crosby, or anyone else in the top 10 of all time because those all belong to Canadians. But you guys have came a long way, and American hockey is here to stay.

Yeah, hit him with the Ovechkin. Yeah.

How about Alexander Ovechkin, biz? How about him in your top 10?

You know what? He's going to go down as the greatest goal score of all time. Correct. But I don't think that anybody would have him in the Mount Rushmore of Hockey.

There's 10 guys on a top 10.

Cindy Crosby is closer to the Mount Rushmore of Hockey than Ovejkind. Wait. I would say that Ovie, once he passes Gretzky for goals, I would say he's probably, yes, going to be coming in around sixth or seventh all time. I think still a lot of people put Stevie Y ahead of him for the amount that he won and also put up points like him, not quite the goals, but from an all-around play perspective, Stevie Wy is definitely ahead of Ovi.

Time out, sidebar with PFT. You can't listen to this. You can't listen to this. That was so patronizing what he just did. Yeah, he pared me on his head. He was like, Oh, yeah, a bunch of Canadians moved to America and then they had kids. Oh, you got college, and you guys are coming. He didn't say we're here. He said we're coming.

Although I don't think that saying, When our citizens move to your country for six months, they want to stay there for the rest of your life, is the own that he thinks it is. Yeah.

We We can't let him patronize this.

No. All right, Biz, you're back. Biz, so we at least beat the fuck out of you in the two of the first three fights in the round Robin. If you guys have all the studs, how come you didn't win?

Well, one of the studs was ill. He was not playing. Are we making excuses? Where we're a little bit thin in the lineup is on the back end. And Makar, a lot runs through Makar. He's like a 28-minute-a-game type player in these types of situations. Now, listen, credit goes to the States. Not only did they come out with the fist of cuffs, they got punched in the nose with a beautiful accelerating move by McJeeezus taking McAvoy to the outside, but then they stopped the bleeding. That was the only goal they ended up scoring. Mcavoy was physical. The rest of the team was physical, throwing the body around, and then they locked things up defensively. They didn't allow McKinnon or McDavid's speed to affect them. They did an unreal job of angling in the neutral zone. That's something you guys need to learn about, the angling in the neutral zone, to to combat that speed coming through the neutral zone. And the Americans did a great job of shutting things down for one game. For one game. You got punched in the nose, and I get that. But like I said, Thursday, we're going to find an answer, and we're going to bring it to you in your own house.

Let me ask you this question, Piz. I saw our good friend Liam Blutman, who's a big puckhead. Huge puckhead. Was tweeting about the lack of goal tending for Team Canada and that a lot of the Canadians grew up wanting to be Sydney Crosby and didn't want to put on the big boy pads. Is there any truth to that, or is it overblown and maybe just a little blip where the Brodor, the Oulango, the Price, the Flory, that was something special. You'll get back to that. It's just maybe you're having a little downtrend.

Yeah. Goaltending has always been a strength of Canada, and they've always been able to rely on three guys bringing them to these international tournaments. I would say that the position has gotten a little bit weaker in Canada. We still have world-class goal tenders. Let's not forget, Jordan Binnington won a Stanley Cup with the St. Louis Blues. In fact, he did win that game seven in the Boston Garden. So he's familiar with the territory He's now entering for the Four Nations Finals. Also, Aiden Hill, who, yeah, maybe he doesn't have this longevity and this big resume that some guys have, but he also won a Stanley Cup with the Vegas Goldenites. And we do have some young guys the pipeline. Now, the United States has definitely excelled in the goal-tending position over the years. They have probably five of the top 15 goal-tenders in the world now. Hellebuck has been on this incredible run. I would say HelaBuck luck based on the last five years, not so much in playoffs or in big money games, which is a good thing for Canada going into this one, because the last few years, he's had these incredible regular seasons where he won the Vesna last year.

He's probably going to win it this year if he continues news, but yet bounce in the first round. So Jake Oettinger is another guy who he played at BU, I believe, and he's an incredible goal tender for the Dallas Stars, and there was even a few left off the roster. So that's a position that Canadians have dwindled in, but nonetheless, still have guys who can get the job done in that.

So this tournament has been incredible. It has been awesome. I think it's going to be on the NHL's wildest dreams how successful that it's been. I saw that the USA Canada game, the round Robin one where we kicked your ass, that was the highest rated hockey game outside of the Stanley Cup final since 2014. So pretty incredible. Great job by the NHL. People are watching this, getting excited about hockey. Is it almost too good, though? Because now I'm like, regular season in NHL is going to be weird to go back to after I've had this taste of ultra-nationalism and just caring so very deeply about a USA hockey game.

Well, I think it shows everybody why best on best is so important. And the league came out with a statement actually right before the tournament started, where they're going to obviously have the Olympics every four years and the two years offsetting the Olympics. So I guess still every four years, but offset by two years, they're going to have a World Cup of Hockey where they're going to essentially control the best on best. Is it going to go back to being a little bit boring? Well, I wouldn't say that because obviously the quality of play won't be as high, but you're So it's also going to be down the stretch here for who's going to try to make playoffs. So the caliber and intensity of the NHL will now ramp up with 30 games remaining and so many teams still in the payoff picture. The way the point system is structured now, it keeps a lot of teams relevant later in the season to have a chance to make a run and capture a payoff position. I want to say that there's six, seven teams in the East that can still grab that Eastern wild card position.

And on top of that, you have this thing that no one ever thought was even possible in the Ovi goal chase. No one thought Gretsky's goal record was ever going to be broken. And they thought that with the way that Ovi was going and trending, maybe coming off of last year that it would take him two, maybe even three years to pass him, and it was going to be like, oh, God, this is taking forever. No, he hasn't slowed down one bit. He's still at his normal pace, where there's a strong possibility that he breaks it towards towards game 80 to 82, in which game 82, they play the Pittsburgh Penguins against Crosby. So for him to break that playing against Crosby, I think that that would be a monumental moment, given the fact that these guys have carried the league for the last 20 years, and they at the same time.

Do you think that people in the NHL are surprised at how engaging it's been and how much people have loved the Four Nations?

I think that people were optimistic going in. I think that a lot of people understood how good this American roster was and that all four teams had a possibility to win. It does suck because the Finns had a few injuries on D, which made them the fourth man out. But that game changed everything. Even going back to the first game, Canada versus Sweden. Canada got out to the 2-0 lead, and twice Sweden came back from two goal deficits, and it went to overtime. It was this incredible three on three, and that set the tone for everything. I think that that made people even more interested. Then when that game happened, I don't know if you guys heard, but you guys know who the Kachuk brothers are. There might be people listening who are not familiar. Walt K'Chuck, Keith is his actual name is a bonafide Hall of Famer. He will be put in the Hall of Fame. American player who scored 500 goals. He's not on the Hall of Fame yet. The fact that he birthed these two children, and braided and Matthew, should put him in the Hall of Fame just for that reason alone.

They should put his sperm in the Hockey Hall of Fame in its own little section, maybe in a cloning lab, if they want to make more guys who can sell the game. Because these guys are like these WWE characters who are not only very highly skilled, they play fucking hard, they handle their own business. And obviously, if they feel threatened in any way, they'll punch your face in, especially if you're booing their national anthem. So they go out there. But that afternoon before the game, they started a text thread with a guy named JT Miller, who's been having a chaotic year with the Vancouver Knucks, who was then traded to the New York Rangers. And they basically said, We're going to flip the Bell Center in Montreal upside down, right from the opening goddamn face off. And then you guys saw the mayday that ensued. So there are so many casual sports fans that are now obsessed with this storyline of these teams meeting back up on Thursday. This couldn't have been a better thing for the NHL. This makeshift experience that took over for an All-Star game has basically now turned into World War three.

This episode that we're airing on Wednesday, we started the episode by saying this is the worst three weeks in sports calendar. There's just not a lot. We're in that dog days, NBA, NHL. This has just been incredible. They've just captured everyone's attention. It feels like Thursday night is going to be so much fun. I do have a question for you. Well, I have two questions. One, will it be a crisis when the US wins on Thursday? Thursday? Is it going to be like crisis in Canada? Like, oh, my God, we've got nothing.

I would say for a week straight, everybody's going to argue about the lineup decisions. There will be conversations of blowing up Hockey Canada and restructuring the whole thing. There'll be dialog about how youth hockey, specifically, is far too expensive, how much it is to rent ice, how much it is to buy equipment, how the common man has been weeded out. So it would It would be safe to say yes. It would be a national emergency if we lose that game on Thursday. That would be fair to say.

Then the other question I have for you. On this same episode, right before you came on, we are putting out the bat signal. We're going to stream because you guys are going to the game. You're not going to the game, but Witt and Jans and all them are going to the game, right? On Thursday night. What are you doing? Are you working?

I've been on the road for a week straight, and I've missed basically every flight has been delayed or are canceled, minimal sleep. I am going to watch from my living room in peace. Okay, great. And zone in. I'm going to watch every goddamn second of that game. That's where I want to be on my couch outside the noise.

Okay, so we might request for you to maybe zoom in between periods to give us a little update. We're going to stream from this studio. We put out the bat signal for one AWL, one listener of this show who is Canadian, that's going to come watch with us. What do you think that person should be? We're going to screen them basically all day, trying to figure out who best fits it. But what do you think we should be looking for in our one token Canadian that we're going to have sit right in the middle of us for this game?

You should probably get somebody who has experience playing hockey growing up in Canada.

Okay.

I think that you should get a blue collar Canadian who's extremely passionate about hockey, somebody who has a thick accent. You are in Chicago, which is pretty central. It would have been funny for you guys to get a maritimer or something. It might be easier for you guys to fly in somebody from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan. Maybe Red Deer, Alberta. Maybe get a true Westerner. I would imagine somebody of that magnitude would have a big impact on the stream to bring their patriotic beliefs in the Canadian hockey to the stream.

If we get it down to three finalists, can I text you the three finalists and have you decide? I would assume that you can just tell by the look of them. We're going to get them to send pictures in and their credentials. I would assume that if you just look at a Canadian, you can be like, All right, that's our guy.

I would say give me a 30 to 60 second video of them describing why they deserve to be on the stream, and then I'll make my pick according to that. They have to provide maple syrup, and every time the Canadian score that you have to do a maple syrup shot, everybody in the room, that has to happen. If he's not wearing a Canadian tuxedo, he's not invited. I think that underneath the Canadian tuxedo, under the jacket, he should go shirtless. And he should be wearing a toque.

Okay. Wait, what are you going to say, Max?

Hank and I are going to try and get them on a Zoom to really get a vibe.

I love that. I love that.

All right, so we'll get us a three finalists, Max, 30 to 60 second video, and then Biz will decide who the actual person is going to be.

And ask them how they would solve the housing crisis in Canada. Okay. That should be their little trick question to see if they... Who knows? Maybe he's the next Prime Minister.

Biz, how would you solve the housing crisis in Canada?

I would just build more houses.

I like the people who solve it. I like the They move Solved on Twitter, and they just circle all of Northern Canada. They're like, Why don't they build houses here? I see that. Every week, they're like, Why is there a housing crisis? Build them here. It's just a circle of the most barren land that's just so cold 10 months a year. Just fucking put the condos here, dude.

We'll get back to Biz Nasty in a second. He's brought to you by Sleep Number. Listen up. We're talking about something that's just as important as game day, sleep. Did you know that Eighty % of NFL players have a sleep number smart bed? That's right. These guys aren't just athletes on the field. They're recovering like pros off it, too. Here's why the sleep number smart bed is all about customization. You can adjust the firmness on each side so couples don't have to fight over who gets the better set up. It's like having a referee in your bed, but no whistles, just comfort. If you're waking up tired or feeling like you just got tackled in your sleep, this bed's got your back. Literally, it contours to your body, even adjust to keep you comfortable all night long. Plus, the new climate cool feature is a total game changer. It keeps you up to 15 degrees cooler, so no more sweaty nights tossing and turning. Bottom line, if it's good enough for the NFL, you've got to check it out. Right now, you can save 50% on the new sleep number, limited edition smart bed. Head to a sleep number store, sleepnumber.

Com, to learn more sleep number, because your best sleep is your best performance. Go get it. Paul Bissenet is also brought to you by our great friends over at Truly. It's Truly time. It's the summer of Truly, coming up. Truly is delicious. I love the Berry Blast. I've got the Citrus Crush right here. Truly Unruly. It is delicious and it's 8% ABV, so it hits hard, but still tastes amazing. Truly Unruly is a hard seltzer. It breaks all the rules, drinks light, parties hard. It's high ABV, and it actually tastes good. It's the official hard seltzer of part of my take. Find a Truly Unruly at a store near you or visit www. Trulyhardseltzer. Com. Com. Now, here's more Paul Bissenet.

I got a question for you. If this game is so important to you, why don't you put... If you lose this game, you got to move back to Canada full-time.

I would do that. But if we win, then Trump can't even talk about one more fucking pair of- Okay, deal. And he has to walk back the 51st State comment. Okay, deal. He has to take the podium at the White House, and he I asked to apologize to not only me, but all of my fellow countrymen about some of the inflammatory comments he's been making, taking over Canada. Okay, deal. We've long been friends with Americans. He started this. I'm sorry about the booze, but they were not directed at people like you. They were directed at the orange man who called us the 51st State.

The booze. By the way, we love the booze. I want there to be booze back. That's what makes sports fun. It's fun.

I would say that the political climate of this game is at the perfect place. It's like, okay, it is serious. I don't think that the tariffs are going to happen. I think he was joking about the 51st State. Let's boo each other. Let's fight each other, and let's go have beers after the game and say, Hey, great job, everybody. We did a lot for hockey. Yes. After a 6-2 Canadian victory with McJeeezus, two goals, Michie Marner with a a goal on an assist, Kael Mccar with one and one, two, and hopefully a Marshawn knuckle sandwich.

But could you imagine if we beat you and then you did become the 51st state? Together, we would never lose another Four Nations again.

True.

We would dominate.

Think about that. We'll add Crosby to our roster.

We could probably find a spot. I think we got room for him. He's getting a little older.

Probably not. Probably not McDavid.

Well, he hasn't won anything. Yeah, right.

So we probably don't want him on our team.

Does that concern you that McDavid's never really won anything, and now you're counting on him to win the big one?

No, it actually doesn't because it's motivated him even more to win this game. Got it. I agree with what you're saying. Everyone's going to... Hey, listen, I'm not being a hypocrite either. Everybody scrutinized Ovi until he won, right?

Yeah, but he won.

And then he won. And then the monkey was off the back, and then everyone called him a winner. So for McDavid, yeah, I think he's one World Juniors, but this is a way bigger deal. There's going to be 15 million people watching worldwide. That would be my assumption as to how many people watch this game. This might go down as one of the most viewed hockey games of all time. So McJesus has to win the big one, and the torch will be passed.

If he loses this one, would it be fair to say that he's the biggest loser of all time?

I don't think that would be fair to say. Okay.

All right. Well, that was just a question. I'm not saying he's the biggest loser of all time. I'm just asking.

This is no No insult to the Bills or is it Jim Kelly?

Jim Kelly, yeah.

He did lose four times in the Super Bowl, straight, right? Right back to back to back to back. It seems mean.

He never lost the USA in a sport that his country created. It'd be like if he lost a Super Bowl to Canada in football.

That's true. That's a good point. I wouldn't say he's the biggest loser, though. I would say that my concerns would rise, whether or not he can win the big one.

Do you think there's a chance, McDavid, knowing how big this game is on Thursday night, do you think there's a chance we see him not come off the ice?

No. I think he's going to play around.

He doesn't want it enough.

You have to drag me off that ice.

I play all 60 minutes. No problem.

They'd have to send the Mounties out there to arrest me and take me off the ice in handcuffs and horseback.

This is what we're saying, dude. If he wants it this bad, don't come off the ice. 60 minutes.

So hockey is an anaerobic sport, and you can't be efficient being out there the full 60 minutes. It's just impossible.

If you don't want it enough.

Yeah, exactly.

Mind over matter.

I bet you if you ask one of the K'Chuck brothers, they do it.

Why would you want to come off the ice to allow a guy like Sidney Crosby to also play 20 minutes?

Oh, you're going to let another man fuck your wife, too? Yeah, dude. Come on. I'm staying on that ice.

Is he wanted or not? I bet you if you ask the K'Chuck brothers right now, Hey, you're going to play 60 minutes? If we ask you two, they'd be like, Fuck, yeah, we will.

Well, we're the cucking Canadians. We do like to share.

Hey, come in here. Finish her off real quick. I'm getting tired.

The real reason we asked you on today is-We're like the Bonnie Blues with the snap around.

We love you. Do you think there's going to be fights? Do you think we're going to see at Puck Drop, first face off, are they going to drop the gloves again?

So I was trying to do my best Dawn King impression, and we had Drew Dauty on postgame, and he's They had an individual rivalry with Matthew Kchuck since Matthew Kchuck entered the league. They were both playing in the West at the time. Matthew Kchuck started with the Calgary Flames. Keep in mind, folks, the guy that you guys have been baglicking the most, the K'Chucks, they both started their careers in Canada. Braided actually still plays for the Ottawa- You literally talked about their father's firm.

Yeah. And you're saying that we're baglickers.

They have honed their skills on Canadian ice. Braided has played for the Ottawa senators, which is the capital of Canada. That's where our parliament is. And Matthew started with the Calgary Flames. And when they would play against the LA Kings and Drew Dauty, they'd always be battling. So I asked after the game, I said, Hey, Hagle said he wouldn't back down. And I know that you've had personal beef with Matthew Kachuk over the years. If he asked you and challenged you to fight, would you do so? And he said, I would do anything, anything for my country. So we may see fisticuffs in that game. I I don't think we're going to see him at the drop of the buck. But if there's a big hit, maybe a little Tom Fullery with running of the goal tender, I think there's a strong possibility that they shed the mitts and they go toe to toe, toe to toe.

Okay, so wait. So Matthew Kuchuk started with the flames in Calgary, and then he had to come. Alberta beef. So he had to come to America to win a Stanley Cup. Is that what you're saying?

He honed his skills on Canadian soil.

Okay. Yeah.

To propel him to learn how to be a winner. What happened when he came to America? To propel him to learn how to be a winner, just like all the people who played in the NHL who are Canadian, who settled in the United States, who helped you guys become a strong hockey nation. You can thank us now.

Does it bother you when we bring up that Canada hasn't won a Stanley Cup in whatever it's been like 30 years, even though every team that wins a Stanley Cup is full of Canadians?

Because we've been helping you guys hone your skills.

You just slap a tariff on us for all the Canadians that are coming over here to play hockey.

Exactly.

And we didn't even ask for thanks for it. All we wanted was your respect and dignity, and we've received none of it.

You call him Connor McJeezus. He's never been a big one. We got big guns like Austin Matthews, certified winner that's going to score a game-winning goal.

Here we got hockey boosting your economy, and now there's threats of you guys crippling ours after everything we've done for you. So I would refrain from your booze that Boston Garden there, Mr. Big Cat.

All right. So I got a question for you, biz. The real reason we asked you on. Okay. Do you have a problem with your hands down your pants?

When I'm nestling up to get a little nap, I don't mind having my hand on my junk. Okay. Because there was a video that came out of the Chicklets boys coming back from Canada down to Boston after the game on Saturday, and you were passed out, hands so far down your pants.

Do you have a statement about that?

I think Al Bundy was onto something.

Okay. Just keeping in for warmth. That was fucked up. They got you dirty on that one.

Yeah, they did. Kind of like how the Americans started the game, sneak attack. This is war. I love this. I'm hoping that Canada deploys the nukes like Tom Wilson. This is war.

We have our own guy that puts his hand on his dick. That's Max. Max is just always... There's nothing wrong with that. It's comfortable.

Yeah, it is. It's comfortable. Sometimes I don't even... I don't realize that I'm doing it, which is bad.

When you got big meaty clankers down there, you got to move them around somewhere.

I just wanted them for... They're our Canadian natural hand warmers. That's what we call them. Canadian hand warmers.

I do put my hands down my pants all the time.

The The NFL, the quarterbacks don't have that pouch. They just put their hand on their nuts in the midst of the game. That's the Canadian Football League.

I'm so excited for that. This is just such a huge win. We talked about it over the weekend, but what hockey did to the NBA this weekend, it couldn't have been a bigger difference. The NBA, and I love the NBA, and I love playoff basketball, but that was unwatchable on Sunday night, whereas hockey has found something that has gotten everyone so excited excited. I'm looking forward to Thursday night like it's a playoff game for one of my teams.

Oh, and as if this game needed a little extra spice, there was rumblings that the greatest American defenseman on the planet who was too injured coming into the tournament is now going to lace him up for the finals. He hadn't played one game, didn't even attend the tournament, and they're calling in the infiltrate.

Yes, love that. Quin Hughes.

Quin Hughes. This kid is unbelievable to watch. For those of you who don't follow hockey much, if he does play, he's a water bug out there. You could also argue the fact that Kael McCar is also a modern day Bobby Orr, but the way that him and Quin Hughes are able to move around back there and walk the blue line with Their Shakira hips and their edge work with their skates and how they're able to find lanes to the net. They're a single man breakout. They don't even need anybody else on the ice to snap it around with. They could just take it up the ice themselves. They're fascinating to watch. Another Another guy to look out for, Columbus Blue Jackets defenseman, Zack Warenzky, played at the University of Michigan. He's had a tremendous season. Because of the injuries that Quinn Hughes has sustained in some of the time he's missed, he could actually maybe win the Norris ahead of him. I think that he should also be in the heart conversation also based on what he's done for the Columbus Blue Jackets alone. Jacob Slaven, a smothering defenseman with a great stick. Another young defenseman in Brock Faber who plays in Minnesota.

The general manager of Team USA as Bill Garen, and he brought this youngster on the team, and he has showed him that he looks like a genius for even adding him to the roster. Incredible shutdown game against the Canadians. As far as the forwards are concerned, Jack Eichel. He won a Stanley Cup with the Vegas Golden Nights. This kid is unbelievable. The way that he moves up and down the ice, the way that he plays on the defensive side of the park as well, the way that he's able to spread the park out and distribute it, yet being so reliable. He To me, he's like Shasha Barkoff for the Florida Panthers. Just like, that's how good he is at playing a full 200-foot game. Austin Matthews, who scored 69 goals last year at the Toronto Maple Heaps, giggity, giggity. He is a lethal sniper for the Americans as well. He has not scored a goal yet in this tournament, but look for him to potentially have an explosive game. I could go on and on- Mr. Clutch, yeah. About all the talent that has been developed on the American side, all thanks to the Canadians.

Those are some of the guys- We got two sets of brothers.

Isn't that largely in thanks to strong, rugged American sperm?

That goes without saying. The K'Chuck brothers are the modern day bash brothers. They literally foreshadowed this in the Mighty Ducks movies about these two. Okay? The Modern Day bash brothers, and they are WWE superstars at the way they can also handle the mic. So I am grateful for these guys in helping grow the game. But on Thursday, they're going to get absolutely fucking worked. Mark my words. This is our score.

This is our score. Yeah, give us a prediction.

Yeah, prediction.

6-2. 6-2. Mec Jesus will rise. Mec Jesus will rise. They will light up Hellebuck in an elimination situation when all the chips are on the table, he is unproven. He is unproven. Canada will take advantage of that. Jordan, the snowman Bennington, will have an incredible performance for the Canadians in Net.

Mark my words. 62 is a ridiculous prediction.

Mark my words. It's It's an absolute spanking. It'll be a message to you, all the casual hockey fans, and that orange man in the White House for threatening the tariffs the tariffs on us.

I wasn't planning on booing O Canada. No, I'm going to boo now. But because of the disrespect you just demonstrated towards our country, and I thought- You disrespected us first. I thought we were friends. My Canadian brothers, I love them, but Biz, unfortunately, had to open his big mouth and say all the mean stuff about the United States. Now I'm-You started I am forced to boo the national anthem. Yeah.

You started this, and I didn't boo the national anthem. Yeah, you did. I respect all the freedoms that this country has provided me and my family. I respect that. You guys disrespected us first. We are not a 51st state. I can't wait till we steal your...

I mean, you should just shut down Canadian hockey. It's over. It's over.

Are you guys done?

I actually have one last question. Roadback question. Roback. Com promo code take. 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, roback. Com, promo code take. Where are you at right now with Blackhawks Twitter? Because you've been in a beef over Conor Bedard. I actually had your back, biz, on the stretch pod. We were talking about it. I had your back because I do think the one thing that always drives me nuts is when people are like, Oh, Biz. I think they put up a graphic like Biz had this many points, Bedard's had this many points in the last five weeks. Just because If he says, Biz didn't score 500 goals doesn't mean he can't talk about the game. If anything, I'd rather have guys like you talk about the game because you didn't have all God's given talent and you had to work your ass off to get to the NHL. So I had your back on that. I think that's bullshit when people going to be like, Biz, babe, had this many goals. He can't talk about anyone.

I may have been a plug, but I do understand the game. I sat right in front of the coach most of my career, right in the middle of the bench, and observed and paid attention to all the little details of the game, every video session. I had to pay attention to those details because if I didn't, I wouldn't have been in the lineup. If I would have messed one of those little details up, I would have been out of the lineup. I was just trying to help Bedard. I personally think I should be on the payroll with the Chicago Blackhawks based on me helping him train this summer on that hike we did, helping him with his face offs at the Winter Classic when we did that little video in which what's happened since his face off percentage has improved. You're welcome. And then he was getting a little bit sloppy defensively, so I called it out. If the coaches don't want to call it out, I will because you guys ain't going to win no Stanley Cups if he's playing defense like that. So you're welcome, Big Cat. You're welcome.

Has it simmered down? Have you talked to Bedard at all?

I respect Black Hawk's Twitter for having their boys back. I respect that. But I was just calling it how I saw it. If you're going for a Stanley Cup, Big Cat, and there's a big fat, juicy rebound in the front the net. Do you want your centerman who's supposed to be in support, swinging into the corner and not stopping in front to potentially rid of the danger of the puck just sitting there in the crease? What do you think?

I want him getting the puck out of there.

That's what I'm saying. Yeah. That's all I was saying on television. Then they got poopy pants because their team sucks, and they're going to be another lottery team.

Yeah, the Blackhush is not good. But listen, Bernard has played better since you made those comments, so I appreciate you calling it He was incredible in the third period of that game.

Then the next game he played against Nashville, given all the negative media attention surrounding it, he had a goal and an assist. I think that although not like Nathan McKinnon dog in him, or maybe like an assassin like Kucharov, I believe that he does have dog in him, and it will eventually be unleashed. He's too stubborn not to become one of the greats. Some people are questioning his speed, his defensive effort, maybe his lack of compete in some situations. I'm not crazy about his body language some of the time, but I think that this kid is very young, he's very determined, and he's going to figure it out with my help, another fellow Canadian.

Would you ever coach?

You know what? I don't think that people would take me seriously as a coach, given how big of a clown I am. But maybe down the road, I would consider it.

You'd be a good coach. I I think just knowing you, how you can relate to everyone, I feel like that's half of coaching is being able to just talk to people and get on their level, and you're able to do that.

Let's say this. After we eventually maybe win a Chicklets Cup in which we're actually competing against you and Keith Yannel's team, the boss.

That's a good part. That's our team. Let's win one of those first.

That'll be a good resume builder for you. That's true.

I forgot you have been a coach of a team that cannot win a roller hockey game.

Let's Let's win that and then hopefully spend a little time with John Gruden, allow maybe some of his skills to rub off on me, and then maybe I'll consider.

I love it. All right. I had one last thing I want to bring up because it was maybe one of my favorite videos that I've seen this year. You were lucky enough to sing on stage with Nickelback. Oh, yeah. There's no higher honor that a Canadian man can get than that. Do you feel like maybe you blew the Canadian load too early? That's something you do after you win the Four Nations. Now it's like, okay, Canada has reached its peak already. Paul Bissenet was up there singing Rockstar with Nickelback. Where do we go from here?

I never really looked at it that way before you mentioned it. A little fun fact, Nickelback is Connor McDavid's favorite band, So maybe there was a little bit of jealousy and distraction at the fact that I got the limelight with Nickelback, and maybe that's why he's distracted from winning the big one. But I would say, no, don't put those negative thoughts in my head. It was an honor to get up there on stage with those guys. I believe there are over 70 million albums sold worldwide, and those guys could put on an unreal 90 minute show. They rocked it out, The Bird's Nest. Jerome Ginnler, another fellow Canadian, was in attendance. He scored 600 goals in the National Hockey League. I was just surprised that he didn't get asked up. There was other hockey players there. So I guess the Irish Traveler situation is what put me over the edge. And as the local citizen of the year, that's why eventually got the nod and was able to perform. But quite the honor. Nervous going in. But I got to thank our boy, Glenny Balls, who was there, who had actually already sang with Nickelback and gave me a nice little pep talk beforehand in order to calm my nerves.

So I got to thank OnlyStance. And he also got me a Bonnie Blue message for my Toronto Mapleies. So he's just on fire. He's basically my life coach at this point.

I think you're in love with Bonnie Blue because you talked about her earlier, you mentioned her again, and I saw earlier today, you said that you would eat her box if it meant that Tom Wilson would play on Team Canada.

Yes. I think that it would be a detractor to the Basch brothers. I call them the BBLs because Keith Kachuk called his son's lunatics. So I call him the Basch Brother Lunatics, the BBLs. Okay. I think that Tom Wilson, considering that Quinn Hughes hasn't played a game this tournament, and they're going to add him to the final roster more than likely, I I fear that they should just open the floodgates and allow any person to now enter the tournament. Tom Wilson is a very feared individual. He four-checks like a motherfucker. He will take a 20 gamer and elbow you right in the jaw. If he could be added to this and we could throw in the nukes, I would muck Bonnie Blue's bin right off the course. I would muck Bonnie Blue Waffle.

Everyone, subscribe to Smitten Chicklets. So Biz, on Thursday night, We're going to have you pick our Canadian. Then I was talking to Granelli as well. We're going to stream in here. Because the boys are going to the game, we're going to try to get them to zoom in a little bit during intermission, and we'll try to hopefully get you on as well. You guys can actually tell us what we're watching. But Hockey's back.

I look forward to seeing this Canadian that you're going to bring on. I hope he brings us luck.

Yeah, because if he doesn't, then I don't-He's going to bring you Free Bird.

That's what he's going to bring. You're going to get free birded to death.

We're going to play some Free Bird.

I have one last thing to say. Yes.

You don't fool my Anthem. You don't fool my at them, goddamn it. Bizz, you're the best, man. Thank you so much. We'll see you on Thursday night.

There's going to be a... What do they call it when they took all the booze away? The Prohibition? Yeah. We're taking away all America's booze, and you're going to be drinking maple syrup. That's it. Once we take over your country.

All right. See you, Bizz. Paul Bissenet was brought to you by Hey Dude.

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Okay, Guys on Chips. Let's go, Hank.

Let's go.

Let's go. Let's read. Let's go. Use that chip.

Hey, guys. Long-time listener, first-time collar. The other night during pregame, my boyfriend and his friend both had to pee. Instead of taking turns like decent human beings, they decided to cross streams. My boyfriend says they saved water, which is good for the environment, but I think that maybe they're gay. Is this a normal thing for guys to do?

They might have been-Not in a bathroom. Yeah, they might have been lying to you, too. Maybe-outside. I've done it before where you go to the bathroom You guys are pussies.

I mean, come on.

I cross stream all the time. I got no problem with this. One dude pees in the shower, the other guy pees in the toilet.

Cross the stream is funny.

It is funny. It's streamworth. Also, these guys could have been thinking about Josh Allen winning MVP if they went to the bathroom together.

Just throwing that out there. Yeah.

But yeah, I do it with my son all the time.

That's fucking awesome. I feel like the-I do it with you guys.

I do with Max.

I'll do it with you. 100%, I don't give a shit.

I have not cross streams like that probably since I was a kid.

Yeah, I feel like if you're outside, taking pisses outside, you just do it next to each other without crossing streams.

You don't actually have the sword fight.

Yeah, no sword fighting.

No. College, I would cross streams for sure.

It's also- Would What's your favorite drunk move to do in the bathroom? If you're with a bunch of urinals, I like to grab my friend's shirt and pull them back when they're taking a piss. That's always fun.

That's a good one. I like to drop and trowel all the way to the ankle.

That one's good, too.

Just ass out in the bathroom. Yeah.

Or just lightly, do you guys ever lightly just not piss on their shoes, but piss close to their shoes? Give them a little warning shot. No. No? Yeah. That's fun, too. I think Max and I are the same. You guys are not not doing it right.

I like really loading up for a fart in the bathroom.

I have some friends in college. They would just take videos of themselves taking a piss in a stall and just pissing all over. Yeah.

Not even close to the toilet. Those are the meanest things, but they make me laugh every time I see the tweets where it's someone being kicked out to Alan, bang, for three from way downtown, and it's just them pissing in the sink or or on the ground.

You know what I like doing? I love those tweets. I like going up to your urinal at the same time as somebody, and then you agree to take one step back every couple of seconds. That's good. And you see you can continue pissing into the urinal the longest.

I used to do this thing in college where it was a super crowded, shoulder to shoulder college bar, and the line to the bathroom be super long, so you would just go up and pretend like you're ordering a drink and just piss on the side of the bar.

Oh, yeah.

Still one of the funniest moments that I think of, probably once every couple of months is when-On the floor?

Yeah, on the floor.

On the bar. You're like, Hey, can I... You're talking to a bar vendor. You're like, Hey, can I get two trulys as you're pissing on the bar?

I went to the Rose Bowl with all my college friends. I think it was the 20... Whatever. It was the Oregon one, and we were just... We lost and we pissed off. Went to dinner later. We're in a booth, and two of my friends, one of those huge booths that takes forever to get out of. One of my friends on the end was just in a bad mood. He just started pissing in my other friend's lap across the booth, and he couldn't get up.

He pissed his fan. That shit's funny. He couldn't move.

He was just stuck there. He literally jumped back. He's like, What the fuck? And there was just a stream of piss going into his lap. That shit's funny.

That's funny. Didn't it happen to Drake?

Did it?

Yeah, I think Drake got pissed on.

In what setting?

I think he was at a movie theater or something.

That's awesome. Yeah. Dude, listen, maybe not... I assume these guys are in their 20s. This is when you do it. Do it. Enjoy it. Piss on each other.

It's fun. It's funny.

It's very fun. Pishing in trash cans, do that all the time when there's a... Like at a game.

Yeah, I mean, peeing outside is way more fun than peeing inside, for sure.

Hi, Big Cat and PFT. My boyfriend is in the group chat with seven other guys he grew up with. They're all in their early 30s. They have a main I chat and subchats for certain topics. One of them is about sex, and my boyfriend is the only one in that friend group that refuses to join that subchat. Should I be proud of him that he keeps our sex life private, or should I be concerned that he doesn't have some locker room talk with his boys?

Thanks. He's in the chat. He just tells you that he's not in the chat.

Because he knows that you're going to bother him and be like, Tell me what's in that chat.

Yeah, what did you say about me in that chat? He's probably the most in that chat.

That's a weird chat.

I feel like that stuff is if you're single or dating around. That's college. If you're talking about your fiancé or wife, it's just all right, you know them.

Yeah, I hit that. What? I think it's awesome if you're single and you're cruising, but then the second your friend has a girlfriend, it's like, I don't want to hear that. That's gross.

Yeah, a weird chat.

But piss it on your guys. That's cool, for sure. Just so we know the lines.

If it's in the shower, you're trying to prevent them from getting athletes.

Speaking of shower, my husband, I'm 99% sure, uses our shower as his jerk off spot. I've never caught him, but he usually takes very long showers, and I swear the drain continues to clog worse and worse. He blames it on my hair getting in the drain or that he's pooping prior to showering, which is why it takes so long. Is he pooping in the- However, I'm the one who always cleans our shower weekly and only find hair on the walls. Plus, I've cleaned some questionable substance off the shower floor. What's my best course of action? Should I bust in the bathroom on one of his especially long showers to catch him or just ask him to jerk off somewhere else and call him out on it. It's gross, awkward.

You can't ask him to jerk off somewhere else. Is any place okay? That should be one of the sacred places that a man has.

Also, it is your hair. It is your hair that's a drain in the drain. It's not semen.

No, there's that thing that goes viral every year. Somebody puts up a fake picture at their college that says, You guys need to stop jerking off in the showers because it's clogging the drains. That's never happened. Drains are robust in America.

Yeah, just let him shower. Let enjoy his shower. Also, it depends on the time. You guys probably agree. Wintertime, I take longer showers. I just get stuck in the hot shower. I just don't get out.

There's something to the shit thing, too. Sometimes-i do that all the time. I'll turn the shower on, let it heat up while I'm taking a poop. Yes. He's not pooping in the shower unless he's doing the thing where you stop the poop down the drain.

Yeah, who was it a celebrity that did that?

I don't know.

I thought there was- That's definitely... He's sitting on the toilet and jerking off while letting the shower run.

Wait, you're saying he's plumping in himself? Yeah. 100%. He's shitting and jerking off?

He's shitting and jerking off.

Shit, then jerking off.

He's giving himself a blumpkin? Yeah.

Also, Google says, no, a shower drain is highly unlikely to clog for semen alone.

Makes no sense. I feel like that was a college myth.

Big time. Wait, there Why am I remembering? It wasn't true. It was like the Richard Geer gerble thing where some A-list celebrity would just shit in every shower he ever went into in a hotel.

And then just step, bash it down the drain of his foot.

I wish someone would tell me.

I think it was Jeff Goldblum. It might have been. Yeah.

All right, last one. When football season ended, I was excited to spend more time with my boyfriend on Sundays, but this Sunday, he played golf in the morning, got home around 3: 00, turned on golf, and when that ended, he immediately turned on Nascar, which he's literally never watched before, but was talking about some parlay and how he had to watch. Does it ever end? When can I spend time with him on weekends?

Listen, this was a tough Sunday. He was trying to fill the void and come down from everything that's happened in the last five months. So you got to give him this one. But yeah, he's got to give you a couple. He'll give you a couple of Sundays here and there.

That has really pushed the limits, though, for a girlfriend that's used to, obviously, football, basketball, Base, hockey, and then he's like, Oh, yeah, we're doing golf and NASCAR on Sunday.

But yeah, this was a transition weekend. Yeah. He can't just jump right into, Oh, let's go apple picking or whatever the fuck you'd do.

You can't really do anything in February.

Well, it sounds like there's somewhere warm.

Yeah, it sounds like he golfed.

Yeah, it's true.

That'd be funny if he just went to a simulator.

Got to go.

All right. Good show, boys. Numbers.

One, one, one, by the way. Just clear that up.

Oh, wow. I was expecting you to say you had one for sure.

Did you get close?

You guys probably don't even remember Hank got it.

Yeah, he did. No, I was going to say, no, I was going to say memes is... Memes, when are we going to start really ramping up the pressure here? Because it's getting a little ridiculous. You've literally never gotten this ever. Old machine, new machine.

It's a problem. How many days has it been? Can we check Did you check that?

It's getting up there.

We checked recently, and it was still a fifth of the amount of time that Hank went.

Here they come. Hey, you guys see Jack, TikTok King? I did.

They're talking about your TikTok, dude. Absolutely.

Jack, great TikTok, dude. Was shocked when I saw it. I was like, whoa. Jack, you were the star of... He doesn't know how to put on his headphones. You were the star of that TikTok, Jack.

Thank you. Jack, are you Canadian? No, I'm not. How close to Canadian are you? I played hockey. Okay. Where were you born?

Toledo.

Not Canadian. It's close.

I've been to Canada.

Okay, that counts. You'll be emergency Canadian.

Sounds good.

All right. Numbers. Two.

Five.

Three. Memes, you're never going to get it, so just say a number. Hundred. Okay. Is it in there? Yeah. All right, yeah.

We'll go 100. 42.

Shane? 99, Poog.

Memes, I'm looking at... Pardon my balls. 11. You've I've never gotten it. I guess it right there.

It doesn't count.

Oh, my God. 60. I saw the zero.

What was your number?

Memes was 100. I saw like...

He's never going to get it. The six looks like zero. So there's not even a scare. He's never going to get it one day. Nope. Love you guys.