Transcript of Peeping Cooper New

Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan. Wanna talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com/callconan. Okay, let's get started.

Hey Cooper, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan. Howdy.

Hey Cooper, how are you?

Good, how's it going?

It's going pretty well. Uh, I have a, a few, uh, scratchings about you right here. You are Cooper Shields. And you're an— it says here you're an architectural historian from Ohio. That's about all I know about you.

Um, that is true.

Uh, tell me what an architectural historian does.

Yes. So there are a few different facets an architectural historian can be. A lot of them are like the, uh, the, the educational side, teaching, researching, and whatnot. And the side I'm on, I work for a cultural resource management firm. And, uh, a lot of what we do— so most of my company is actually archeologists, and there's 10 or so of us. And a lot of the projects that we do are government-mandated surveys. So when a, when a project is done in the U.S. that requires— that uses federal money, it triggers a cultural resource survey. And so that makes sure that the project doesn't negatively affect any of our cultural heritage, whether that's architectural, historic, or archeological. So what we'll do, what, what I do in the aboveground section, as we call it, is you do just survey work. So is that roundabout going to necessarily impact that historic house that's sitting on that corner? If it is, what can we do to mitigate it? Can they move it slightly? Can they move the house? Can they move the project? House?

Oh God, developers must hate you.

Yeah, you must be hated by— it says here you've been attacked by many developers.

It's, it's mostly homeowners. Homeowners.

Okay. Yeah.

When, when you're when you're driving around in a car with an orange vest on taking photos of people's houses, you get some weird looks.

Well, I hope so.

It's a good way to be a peeper.

Yeah. I mean, that's the thing is you could be— Cooper, you could be a serial peeper who got into this. And you talk a nice game up front about preservation and surveys, trying to lull people into this sort of— NPR fog of, uh, it's all legit. But you're a guy in an orange vest, which by the way is not mandated by your job. That's your choice.

It's branded, but it's not— it's optional.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, um, you're— and you're taking some creepy pictures.

I never zoom.

These are not historic homes you're photographing. Often these are homes that were—

they're apartment— they're apartment buildings.

Yeah, they were built in the 1980s. Um, college dorms. Yeah, college dorms. I have concerns about this sorority and, uh, its historical value. Sir, it was built in 1993.

Oh man, he does such important work, and look what he— well, look what we've done to him.

Is it that important?

Yes, it is.

Listen, I— and, and Cooper, I don't say that to in any way, uh, denigrate you. I don't think my job is important, um, and so I think together, we're wasting America's time.

Are any of us actually important in the grand scheme of things?

Uh, I would say— I don't know. I mean, I think there's some actors, big A-list actors, that are very important. Oh, what? Okay, I just wanted to throw that out there.

That's the route you'd go for that.

But okay, doctors— your dad was a doctor and your mom was a lawyer.

Yeah, but he wasn't in a movie, and neither was my mom. You know, a DiCaprio, that's like a very important person. And I don't want to talk about this anymore, it's just so obvious. This sounds very cool. Like, you must have architectural styles that you like, architecture, architectural styles that you favor over other styles. What are the kinds that you really like?

True.

What gets you all hot and bothered?

So I like to say that I prefer historically underappreciated styles. So things like Brutalism, Postmodernism, like late modernist, like 1970s, '80s kind of weird stuff that isn't the coolest to the, you know, to the normal observer.

But it's not the gorgeous Victorian house that's surrounded by stately elms. Brutalism, you're talking about giant blocks, right? Giant and poured concrete. And, uh, yeah, of course. Uh, and, and, you know, like a giant slice of a window, right? And, uh, a really shiny floor and hard surfaces. You like a home that can't be baby-proofed, is that right?

That's true. It's all danger.

Yeah. You like a house where, like, the nursery has spikes coming out of the floor.

They're concrete spikes, but yeah.

Yes.

You have to be specific. Boston City Hall, I think, is a really cool building.

Oh, come on.

No, it's not. I was in it last year. It was great.

I don't care why you were arrested. That's not important to me.

It was a conference, thank you.

I'm sure. We were all arrested. It was the Peepers Conference.

Back to that.

You all had giant X-ray specs on. You were all rounded up together. Look, Cooper. They're onto you, and I'm onto you. No, that is— I mean, I grew up with that building. That building was built when I was a very young boy, and I just never liked that building. Has it come around? Is it that our views have changed and now you appreciate it? Or do you appreciate it because no one else likes it? Ah, that's it.

So, okay. So there's, there's a chance that I'm, I'm, I'm trying to be a little bit sneaky about that and think that you're a contrarian.

You're a contrarian, correct?

Yeah.

Oh, everyone hates that.

Oh, I was, I was vindicated because my, my wife, who is in the same field as I am, um, we were at that conference last year in Boston, and Abby and I, we were just walking around in awe. And so it's not just me, and it was also everyone there. It was also a conference on modern architecture.

Mm-hmm.

So it might have been a bit skewed in the audience.

To be fair, I haven't been there in a really long time. I think the last time I was there was when I got arrested. Yeah, why? No, I actually was punched in the face and I had to go later on to some They called me in for some reason to give testimony or something about beatings and who deserves them and who doesn't. And I deserved one.

It's an expert witness.

Yeah. Oh, look at— Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Just to describe what's happening here to the listener, Sona just pulled up a picture of the Boston City Hall and showed it to myself and then to David. So, when you heard right now, "Huh?" Yeah. See? Uh-huh. Yeah. That's what was happening.

It's been voted like the ugliest building in the country.

Yeah.

Multiple times.

Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah, it's a crime. It's a crime. And you're wrong. You know what I love is that— I love that your wife does the exact same thing that you do. Mm-hmm. That's so— I picture you meeting. You both reached for the same orange vest and your hands touched and you were like, excuse me. And she was like, excuse me. And then you went, oh my. And your glasses fogged up. What happened?

So we met in, we met in grad school.

Yeah.

Uh, we both went to Ball State University in beautiful Muncie, Indiana.

Wait a minute, Ball State? Uh, that's David Letterman's college.

That is David Letterman's alma mater.

Yes. I, any college that spits out a David Letterman is okay by me. Mm-hmm. So very cool.

She, she saw him on campus multiple times and I think it, it's, it turned into kind of what's that massing of students over there? And it's, oh, it's David Letterman.

Yeah, I don't get that when I go to Ball State and wander around. Why would you? I walk around and I hope that people come up to me, and they don't.

Okay. Yeah, you didn't go there.

No. Okay, but I've been— I just constantly hang out there hoping that I get some of that vestigial Letterman love, you know. What do you think if I were be a building or Sona a building or David Hopping, what kind of style do you think we would be? Yes.

Yes. I thought about this.

You just said that like a villain. Did you hear that?

Indeed.

Yeah.

And you thought about this.

I thought about it.

Yeah.

Oh, cool.

So Conan.

Yeah.

So for you, I'm going the postmodern style. Why is that? So very avant-garde, kind of late 20th century. And the building in specific, in specifically that I thought about is the Disney building, the Disney headquarters in, in LA. It's, it's very bright, it's very larger than life, and it's very kind of in your face purposefully. It accepts it.

Wait, is this the one that has like the dwarves, the Seven Dwarves, the Seven Little People? Does it have them?

Um, it does.

Wait, no, that's not it.

Concert Hall, that's cool.

That's the Disney Concert Hall. That would be flattering. Yeah, show me this other Disney building.

I think it's just the Walt Disney off, like, office building.

Yeah. Type in, um, ugly shit in LA.

Pops right up. Team Disney Building.

What's that?

Team Disney Building.

Team Disney.

That's the actual name.

Uh, and why? Why do you think I'm this building? Uh, be honest.

So postmodernism was kind of a response to modernism, just like international style, early 20th century.

Yeah, the way Post Malone is a response to a guy named Malone.

Yes.

Right.

Uh, perfect timing.

Oh, for God's sake. Oh my God.

And it was done.

That's what you think I am? Seriously, people need to go on a website and look up Team Disney building. That's what you think I am. A building suspended by cartoonish dwarves.

Well, when you think too hard about it, it gets a little weird.

All right, well, okay. And what about Sona?

So Sona, I like the Gamble House, which is in Pasadena. It's the epitome of Arts and Crafts style.

I do. You know what? Gorgeous. I love Arts and Crafts. Can I see a picture of that, please?

It's also—

Come on, Eduardo. What are you doing over there?

Doc Brown's house in Back to the Future as well.

That's a beautiful house.

It sure is. This is much better than the Team Disney building.

That's a gorgeous house.

Yeah.

Uh, who lives there?

I think it might be a museum. I think it's a museum now.

Yeah, no one lives there.

Well, if it's a museum, you can go and just hang out there.

If you're courageous enough, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, you wait until closing time, you say, "I have to use the bathroom," and then you hide in the stall. And then when they leave— I've done this at many museums. Oh my God. I do this a lot at presidential museums. I spent 6 days at the Dwight Eisenhower Museum. Um, it's really fun. You get to wear his pajamas and stuff and hang out. Uh, so, um, and what— and David, David, what would David be? Man, these guys are making out better than I am. So, and remember, it can be a temporary structure. I thought you're gonna say Legos. No, no, it can be like, oh, we tied this together because there was a storm.

So, um, David's Illinois history, Midwestern. Um, I'm thinking a, a nice foursquare, like prairie style, but early prairie style. Just very simple, understated.

Yes.

But still just like a nice place to be because it made it warm.

Something you'd pass 1,000 times and never think twice.

Okay, well, those are your words, not mine.

Because I'll tell you something. When you pass my building and you see a bunch of fucking dwarves, you're going to notice it. You're going to be like— And a common reaction to me is, I don't like what's happening over there, but it did grab my eye.

So you're not disagreeing with me.

Oh, Cooper, I have a question, because this is something that's near and dear to my heart, and you might be able to help me here. A part of your job, uh, I believe, is writing nominations for the National Historical Registry, meaning you can help, uh, assign historic status, official historic status, and get it on the registry of a building that is linked to an important person. True?

Correct. So, um, part of my job is oftentimes writing nominations to the National Register of Historic Places, which is the, the country's official register of buildings we deem worthy of, uh, of recognizing, worthy of significance. Sure. And there are a handful of ways that you can deem those buildings significant, and One, one of them is an important person. I think you'll have to die in order for it to, like, work well. I don't think there's oftentimes where they're done when people are living.

So I'd have to be dead in order for a building to be given historic status based on you. Well, I'm going to say something for a second. I don't think that's true. When you go to London, you see plenty of those blue plaques And it's to people that— some of them are still alive. It's like, this is Mick Jagger's home where he grew up. You know, you'll see some things like that. And some of them, they're not— they're still alive and they're touring, for God's sake.

You could be— you could be the case study for the first one in the United States.

So, okay, because I prefer to be alive. And then what structure would be worthy of historic registry? There's my childhood home in Brookline, Massachusetts. And what else? Of course, there's this— various elementary schools, and I'm thinking more than one that I went to. Um, there's the Baldwin School, then there's the Michael Driscoll School, then of course there's Brookline High. Could I get plaques for all of these, or is it just a one-and-done thing?

So the plaques are things you can just kind of do on your own if you want to. They're not— the plaque isn't the official part, so we can just make one, go tape it up.

You know what, uh, David, I'll order one as my assistant.

One?

No, we're— oh yeah, I want all kinds of plaques. Well, They have to be fairly cheaply made, 'cause I'm gonna want a lot of plaques. I want homes that I've lived in in New York. I want homes that I've lived in in Los Angeles. I moved around a lot when I was a young man.

This building.

This— Oh, Larchmont? Here? This Larchmont Studios? Where magic was made? Yes. So, across the board, we're gonna need a lot of plaques. They should probably be made of a durable paper. You know, initially rain-resistant, but then they— Because we're gonna— I don't wanna spend too much money on it. And there's a lot of places. A lot of places need to be, uh, yeah, I don't know how it all works, but I guess I'd like you to look into it some more. I'd like a way to have a plaque put somewhere with my name on it on some structure, and I'd like it to be while I'm alive. So can you be thinking about that?

My wife Abby actually works for the Ohio State Historic Preservation Office as one of the National Register of Historic Places reviewers. Okay, so I will I will, I will take this to her.

But wait a minute, it has to be in Ohio? No, I've been through Ohio, but I don't know that I've—

state— every state has a historic preservation office. Okay, the state historic preservation office.

I want— I am not—

can collaborate.

I want Abby. May I call her Abby?

Of course.

Okay, I want Abby on this. Uh, I want her to be looking into it. Um, and my requirements are a plaque— well, I'm gonna be, you know, if If I don't have to supply it and someone else is paying for it, I want it to be a plaque, a real plaque, and it should be someplace, I believe, in Massachusetts. And we need to get this done. We need to get it done quickly so I can hang out there and then act like I didn't notice there was a plaque. To— I mean, imagine being— hanging out and having a plaque and being like, oh, oh, I guess that's me. Yeah.

But you're hanging out right next to it.

You got it.

And you're just acting like you had no idea.

Yeah, I'll get like, I don't know, I'll get a sugar cone ice cream, you know, and I'll just be like, it's good ice cream.

Oh, this?

I guess that's where I was born. Oh my God. Yeah. That's so sad. Who looks into whether these plaques are accurate or not? Let's say I wanted a plaque that said, "This is where Conan O'Brien set the record for most touchdowns in a high school football game." Does someone fact-check that shit?

Probably not. I think you can just go to a trophy manufacturer and they'll make you a plaque.

I've done that. I've been thrown out of so many trophy stores. That's all I—

I think it would—

I've been forcibly walked out of several, several trophy stores.

I think the amount of oversight would be dependent on where it's placed, because if you put that outside of a, like a Dairy Queen.

Yeah.

I don't think many people would think, think too strong, but if you put it at, you know, outside of the soldier field, that—

Yeah. Yeah. People are going to see it. You're right. I got to pick an in— Yeah. If my plaque is a, just a blatant lie, then it should be someplace quiet. Cooper, this is, I have to say, This interview started out very quiet, you know? You were talking about surveys. I panicked for a second, and then this turned into one of my favorite interviews in a while. So—

I appreciate that.

I mean, you started slow, as I did in life. You started slow, and then bang, it was fantastic. Absolute joy talking to you. Seriously.

Thank you.

You're very funny. You have a dry wit. You're clearly very intelligent, and I think you're doing something cool. I appreciate that.

Appreciate it.

Yeah, I really do appreciate this. And I do— not kidding— I'm going to want to hear from Abby.

Okay, I'll make sure that happens.

Okay. All right, take care, man. Good to talk to you, Cooper.

Thank you all. I appreciate it.

Bye-bye.

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