Transcript of The Scapegoat | EP 2 | The Confidante

This is an iHeartRadio podcast, Guaranteed Human. Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Ioannou. We're 2 best friends, 22 years apart but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. Now in my 30s, Being the founder of New Shoes, good taste is my business. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Melissa Jeltzen, host of the What Happened to Her podcast. We're kicking off the season with the Sandra Birchmore story, a case the police wrote off as a suicide in a snowstorm. Her family never bought it, and the man they suspected wore a badge. You never know who that devil is because he's wearing a disguise. Sometimes it's a police uniform. And you can get access to all episodes 100% ad-free with an iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscription exclusively on Apple Podcasts, available only to iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait, head to Apple Podcasts, search for iHeartTrue Crime Plus, and subscribe today.

I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast, the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it. Each week I bring on an amazing guest Ooh, I scammed him.

What?

I could talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The Scam Goddess. Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman.

Angela Giarratana.

Jeremy Culhane.

Patrick McDonald.

And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast. The improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone.

You can—

I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

It all sounds fucking crazy. It was happening all the time, all hours of the night into the morning, and it was so nerve-wracking. It is enough to make anybody go crazy. It is enough to make anybody sick.

I'm Andrea Gunning, and this is Betrayal, season 6, episode 2, The Scapegoat. In our last episode, we introduced you to Karl Bryan.

Yeah, I'm a nerd. I'm such a nerd.

He's a queer man from Kenosha, Wisconsin, with a big laugh and a big heart. His first relationship was rocky. Alcohol became an everyday struggle for his boyfriend, Adam Mejia. Like many people who love addicts, Carl didn't know how to handle it.

I had a nervous breakdown on the carpet. Like, I laid on the floor just having a breakdown because he was completely wasted.

Their life together quickly fell apart.

And I said, this is it. There's no saving this relationship.

But just after the breakup, Adam got into a serious drunk driving accident. He was sentenced to 15 months behind bars. While he sat in jail, he spoke to Karl on the phone.

He said it quite frequently that, like, yeah, he was upset that I didn't call an Uber.

Karl replayed that night in his head, wishing he could have stopped Adam from getting in that car.

It was just, like, immense guilt, immense guilt that I was feeling. I should have called an Uber.

Carl thought maybe if he had called an Uber, Adam wouldn't have gotten his 4th DUI. He wouldn't have caused a major accident. He wouldn't have gone to prison. Along with the guilt, Carl had another feeling— anxiety. Was Adam stewing behind bars over what happened, blaming Carl for it all? And what would happen when Adam got out?

I don't know what his intentions are. Like, that was kind of what was going through my mind at that time.

That's when Karl turned to an old friend, a source of levity and humor. His name is Paul Augustine. You met Paul in the last episode. Release your inhibitions, feel the rain on your skin. As you can hear, he was a lot of fun. They hadn't spent much time together over the last year, Karl's ex never liked Paul. And during that time, Paul had been going through his own grief. His boyfriend died unexpectedly at the age of 33.

I know it was a difficult time for him too because his boyfriend had passed away. And he was having a hard time of it himself.

Paul's boyfriend also struggled with substance abuse.

I think that shared experience of being 2 exes of individuals that have had significant alcohol problems, trying to make sense of a really traumatic fallout, Paul was there, you know? He was somebody I could lean on.

So Carl and Paul reconnected. They started doing the same things they used to do, going to the movie theater, catching Cubs games, and trying out new restaurants and bars.

We'd go out for drinks and just, you know, it would be an innocent, fun, lighthearted time.

Being together lessened the burden of what they were both going through. When Carl first met Paul 9 years earlier, Paul friend-zoned him right away. To Carl, it seemed to be because of his weight. Since then, Carl's body had changed significantly. He'd lost £150. And that summer of 2022, suddenly Paul seemed interested. They hooked up a few times. But for Karl, it was empty.

My heart was not there. I tried to assure him, like, hey, you know, this is no reflection about how I see us in terms of our friendship. I still care about you as a person. I still want to be your friend. And he's like, I understand. That's fine.

He and Paul went back to being friends as if nothing had changed. All the while, Karl kept dating.

I was checking Facebook Dating, and I wasn't talking to anybody, but, you know, I'm still socializing. What the hell?

Keeping your eye out.

Keeping my eye out.

He decided to take a few days off to go see one of the Cubs' minor league baseball teams, the Iowa Cubs.

So I was out in Des Moines, I was doing the vacation, I was enjoying myself.

But after the trip—

Even though I'd gone back to Kenosha, Facebook Dating still thought I was in Iowa for some reason, and I matched with Drew.

Drew looked like someone Karl could get along with. He was unassuming with dark hair and glasses. Drew was a little bit younger than Karl, but he seemed mature and there was just this lightness about him.

In his photos, it was him at his sister's wedding and it seemed like he had a solid family. And I saw that he loved baseball and I was like, yeah, I'm gonna swipe right on this guy. He swiped right on me, and I don't think he was thinking much of it because we obviously lived 5 hours apart from each other or whatever. It was just like, let's talk and see what happens kind of thing.

He and this new guy Drew agreed to meet in the middle, in Madison, Wisconsin, a city Karl knew well.

I showed him my favorite places when I lived there and just had a blast. He likes Harry Potter and Nintendo and Definitely gives off a little bit of a dorky vibe, admittedly. Some of that was refreshing to be able to find another gay man that was willing to get into some of those things too. And very quickly I could tell I didn't just want casual with this guy.

Immediately, Karl could tell Drew was relationship material. That summer they spent weekends together, meeting halfway, were going to each other's cities.

It was amazing to just find a guy that was like, hey, I like you. Let's date. Let's build this thing. It was like, wow, I actually didn't have to chase somebody to get their approval. And everything about it just felt natural. I mean, like, this felt like it was coming home to somebody.

One night in November 2022, Karl and Drew were just sitting in bed together. When Drew asked to make it official.

And I was like, yes, of course. Yes, I will be your boyfriend. I want to be your boyfriend. It was remarkable because it was unremarkable. And I don't say that, like, in a way that was like, this is a boring relationship or whatever. But, like, I say this because it was like, wow, this was just amazing.

Karl was moving forward. It seemed like everyone was. In February of 2023, he got word that Adam was released from prison, but Carl tried not to dwell on it. He just hoped that the drama, for everyone, was in the past. Not long after that, Drew decided to move to Kenosha to be closer to Carl.

He could live on his own and have his own space, and I could be in my own space and have my own time. But still be close enough for us to develop our relationship further.

Karl helped him find an apartment. The day Drew moved to Kenosha was supposed to be a happy occasion for both of them, the start of a new chapter. But on that very day, something unsettling happened.

We were getting a couch in the garage, and that was just when I was looking down at my phone.

He had a text from his best friend, Paul.

And Paul was telling me he got a message on Grindr from Adam.

Karl's heart sank. He hadn't heard from his ex-boyfriend Adam since his first few months in jail. Karl thought their relationship was in the past.

We'd gotten into it on the phone over his jail calls. He didn't want to talk to me anymore, I didn't want to talk to him, and at some point we ceased contact. And I think for my own sanity, that was probably what was best.

But now Adam was back, and it looked like he had quite a lot to say. This was the very thing Carl had been worried about, except his ex wasn't reaching out to him directly. Adam had gone to his friend Paul. Paul sent Carl the screenshots, and there it was— Adam's Grindr profile picture above a long paragraph of text. Paul said he'd gotten this message out of the blue. We've had a voice actor read that first message.

Just realized that Carl's attempts to lie to you or whatever dude he's involved with at this point in his life is so beyond ridiculous.

To be honest, I don't know if that's you or someone else, but if he's with you, you should know that we have seen each other recently. I stopped following up on any type of plans with him because he's a pathological liar and a sex addict that switches up his boys on the daily. Carl stopped cold. He had no idea what Adam was talking about. He hadn't met up with Adam or even spoken to him recently. So what he'd written was completely false. It looked like Adam was just trying to create problems in Carl's life. But it was strange that Adam reached out to his best friend Paul, a third party. Adam never liked Paul. He never even wanted to meet Paul. But as Carl kept reading, he realized why his ex was reaching out to Paul of all people. Being sober has given me the insight to see his true colors, see his lies for what they really are. I'm sure this is shitty for you to read, but you deserve to know the truth about who he is. Instead of blocking this after you read it, think about it and do yourself a favor and never say I didn't warn you or whatever boy he's using now.

I never hated you, by the way. Just was suspicious about Carl cheating with you at the time. Never meant to attack you in the past. A lot has changed for me after being sober for the past year and a half. For a brief moment, Carl wondered if this was a prank, if this was just someone messing with him. But there was one line that made him certain this message was written by his ex-boyfriend Adam. How badly does Carl want this hat back? I could drop it off by you. The hat. When Adam moved out of the apartment they shared, some of Carl's things went missing, including a baseball hat that Carl loved. My producer, Caitlin, asked Carl about it. You'll hear her pop in throughout the series.

Spring training every year, I got my souvenirs. Those memories are very near and dear to me, and the hats that I have and whatever. I would never give away that hat. And I was always wondering where that hat went. Somehow I had stumbled upon a picture of Adam with a friend of his where he was outdoors, like hiking or whatever. And I saw he was wearing it.

And is this picture from after he's out of jail?

Yeah. And I looked at the picture and I'm like, that's where that hat went.

The hat was such a specific detail from their breakup, something only Adam would know about. Clearly, he was using the hat as bait to make Carl interact with him, or so Carl thought. What stung the most about this message was hearing Adam's version of their breakup, one where Carl had cheated and lied. Carl knew that was a complete fabrication, but that was the kind of lie that could damage his reputation for good.

I was thinking Adam is probably just acting out, and this is what he's doing to get attention. He wants to start drama like he would always do.

Carl didn't want to reach out to Adam directly, But they did still have a mutual friend. Carl told her about the messages.

And showed her these screenshots and was like, look at what Adam's doing.

Their friend went right to Adam and told him to knock it off.

My friend actually confronted him and was like, Carl's moved on. Like, leave Carl alone. And Adam denied it.

Adam told their friend, He never sent that message.

He said, I've moved on. I'm working on my sobriety. I just started a new relationship myself. I moved up north. I just hope the best for Karl. I hope he's doing well, but I have not said anything bad about him. And that mutual friend got back to me with that. And my immediate reaction was, I don't believe any of this.

After that, no one heard from Adam for a while. For Carl, the silence was welcome. His new boyfriend Drew had just moved to town. He was Carl's priority now. But about a month later, Adam resurfaced. This time, he texted Carl directly, and his tone had shifted completely. This message was an apology. I have no animosity towards you. Substance abuse altered my judgment and temperament throughout everything, and I'm definitely in a different state of mind now and taking responsibility responsibility for my own life. Part of that is acknowledging how horrible I was towards you.

It didn't really seem anything but, like, an attempt to be conciliatory and be nice and establish some kind of cordial relationship at the very least.

Adam texted him again, acknowledging the baseball hat he'd taken and offering to return it. I'll mail the hat if you want, since you probably don't want to see me ever again. It was a nice gesture, but then just a few days later, Adam was back to causing drama. Carl received another text.

Your new boyfriend should know the truth about what you did to me.

The lies, the cheating, all of it. Why is it okay for you to just move on and shove shit in my face and walk away?

Honestly, I was dumbfounded.

It was a complete mindfuck, emotional whiplash. Karl didn't know what to make of it. Over the course of that summer, texts from Adam kept coming in. You will have hell to pay, and all I can wait for is the shitstorm that is about to wreak havoc on your life. Karl tried to ignore the texts. In fact, he blocked Adam, but his messages kept coming from new numbers. He'd block those too, but the next day a new number would text him. The contents of the messages really got under Carl's skin, especially since the texts referenced specific moments from their relationship. Remember when I sent you a Valentine even when I was in fucking jail?

He had somebody in jail make a Valentine card and was able to mail it to me.

White Castle is still nasty as fuck.

That was in reference to a time that Adam and I went to White Castle and we both hated it.

The texts oscillated between bids for attention and searing criticism. And oftentimes, they would come back to the car accident. How hard was it to call me an Uber that night?

Almost like you're glad that it went the way it did. I was immediately activated when I got that text because, I mean, that was kind of validating that sense of guilt that I had built up. And there was definitely a lot of anxiety. Because I didn't know what he was going to do next. I didn't know what he was capable of.

Then, Karl got a call from his family. Karl has an uncle with intellectual disabilities. He lives with Karl's parents and needs a lot of support. It turned out that uncle had just received a disturbing text from an unknown number. Your nephew Karl wishes you would stop being an embarrassment to him and the rest of the family. He says you bother him and thinks you're the dumbest person ever. His boyfriend Drew hates you too.

My uncle was reading this off to me and I was angry. I was really mad because now you're bringing my uncle into this who has a mental disability that he has no control over. There was some time that needed to be spent for me to be able to explain to him, like, I'm being harassed right now. I hope you know that this is not me and this does not reflect how I see you. I was extremely angry when I heard about that text message.

It crossed another line, dragging a family member into the harassment, someone who couldn't defend himself. It showed just how low Adam was willing to go.

I was thinking Adam is probably back to drinking right now.

But the truth wasn't that simple. This was only the beginning of an orchestrated plot.

I was outraged. I was like, what the fuck? What the absolute fuck? Like, who does he think he is doing this?

I'm Melissa Jeltzen, host of the What Happened to Her podcast. We're kicking off the season with the Sandra Birchmore story, a case the police wrote off as a suicide in a snowstorm. Her family never bought it, and the man they suspected wore a badge. You never know who that devil is because he's wearing a disguise. Sometimes it's a police uniform. And you can get access to all episodes 100% ad-free with an iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscription exclusively on Apple Podcasts, available only to iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait. Head to Apple Podcasts, search for iHeartTrue Crime Plus, and subscribe today. Lisa, we should tell them about our new show. Oh my God, Lexi, we have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Ioannou. We're 2 best friends, 22 years apart, But so close at heart. And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. I'm not gonna get anywhere fighting. That is wild. I learned that about you today. Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, good taste is my business, and I've always got something to say.

If men were just honest about this, there would be so much more peace in the world. We're gonna talk about dating, relationships, beauty, getting older. And a little wiser. We're best friends, but we don't always agree. Because you told us how accommodating you are. Obviously, I would do what I think I could do to fight the fight, but there's only so much fight I can fight.

Don't lie to me.

Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me.

Liar.

Listen on the iHeartRadio app. Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I don't really care. I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast, the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it. Each week I bring on incredible guests like Conan O'Brien, Iowa Debris, Lamorne Morris, and Nicole Byer. Ooh, I scammed them.

What?

I could talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And the scams run the gamut. I'm talking about scams from the 1800s all the way up to today. I also warn you and keep you safe against scammers. Call your grandparents. Tell your parents to stop clicking on links, please. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. If there's a scam, I'm here to protect you. And I'm also here to laugh with you. So if you like fun, if you like comedy, and you like learning and protecting yourself from criminals, Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Scam Goddess! Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman, Angela Giarratana, Jeremy Culhane, Patrick McDonald, and we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast. The improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

Join us for a panel of wellness influencers.

What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know, have you guys heard of faux journaling?

Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading.

So you're—

so we don't like to use that word anymore.

Okay.

A panel of New Yorker cartoonists.

Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class?

No!

I've been dying to. I'm so sorry, I'm, I'm seeing a, a reading of Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audra McDonald at the Wonderland Bookstore on the 14th. That's crazy, I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday. I was at the bookstore today and I heard Norah Jones do a reading of Zero Dark Thirty.

No way!

You have to come to the last bookstore though. Kim Cattrall is reading the guitar tabs of Yesterday.

A panel of Eurovision participants.

And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone.

You can—

I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet. As when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artist on Artist on Artist on Artist on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In the summer of 2023, Karl Bryan was beginning a new chapter. After months of long-distance dating, his boyfriend Drew moved to Kenosha to be with him, and Karl welcomed another member into his family. Lambo, a rescue dog from a local shelter. Now, Carl and Drew were hanging out almost every night, cooking dinner, playing with Carl's dogs.

I was riding a high for a while because, like, I had what felt like a normal relationship. Drew's in the picture, and we're all going to be a happy family.

But on the very day Drew moved to Kenosha, Carl's ex-boyfriend reemerged.

The timing was uncanny.

It was supposed to be a happy new chapter for Carl. But that summer, the disturbing texts from Adam escalated.

I'm trying to go into this hopeful new future with somebody else. Like, this is my life now. Leave me be. Leave me alone. And it was like, are you kidding me? Like, what a way to start the next phase of our relationship.

At first, Karl tried to keep his new boyfriend Drew away from the drama. He even blocked Adam's number. But the texts kept coming from new numbers, and other people in Karl's circle started getting messages too. Increasingly, they were about Drew. Karl's boyfriend is hella fucking ugly, dude. He's so nasty looking. Why would he pick someone so hideous? It was the kind of petty insult that made Karl roll his eyes. Earlier that summer, a mutual friend asked Adam to stop. Adam continued to deny he was behind the texts, but Karl didn't believe him. At the time, Karl was starting a PhD program, and his new boyfriend Drew got a job at a local convenience store called QuikTrip.

We didn't really have a lot of money, but, you know, we were making it work. And he was always over and we were doing the couple things. It was awesome.

Then on September 2nd, 2023, Karl got a text from a random number. This one felt different. It was way too close to home. Saw your new boyfriend at the Kenosha QuikTrip. Laughing my ass off. And then later that day, Karl got another text. KCA0124. Better stay safe. Karl stared at the numbers and letters. It was Drew's license plate.

It's entering our sense of safety. I was outraged. I was like, what the fuck? What the absolute fuck? Like, who does he think he is doing this?

Suddenly, the threat felt much closer. Was Drew being followed? Stalked? Karl and Drew began scanning parking lots. checking their mirrors, wondering who might be watching. A few days later, Drew came home from work looking like a different person. This wasn't the Drew that Karl was used to, the calm, happy guy. There were tears in his eyes. He was shaking.

Apparently, somebody had called the gas station explaining they wanted to speak to a regional manager because one of their employees Drew, he was apparently harassing kids, and the harassment was sexual in nature.

These were kids who'd stopped by the store to get snacks and drinks after school. Drew was being accused of sexual misconduct with minors. He could lose his job or worse. His boss and coworkers confronted him about the allegations.

There was a couple of people that had sat down with Drew and was like, is this true? And of course, the answer was no.

The online harassment was making its way into the real world. And now, Karl wasn't the only target. Adam was determined to make both his and Drew's lives a living hell. Drew's boss believed him and let him keep his job. But that day, something broke in Drew.

The anxiety and the fear didn't just land for me anymore. It was also for him. It was honestly a turning point for Drew in that he was very much anxious. He was very much paranoid and just concerned about his safety in general.

For Carl, it became harder and harder to think about anything else. It was always, when is the next bomb going to drop? What percentage of your brain at this point is focused on the harassment?

75%, at least. I don't know how I was getting through the workday. I don't know how I was getting through anything.

But Karl and Drew weren't the only targets. There was someone else who was now getting threatening messages— Karl's friend, Paul Augustine.

Knowing that Paul was also being targeted was proof to me That it has to be Adam. Adam never trusted Paul. He didn't like Paul. So this was totally believable that Paul was also being targeted in the same way that everybody else was.

You may recall that when Adam got out of prison, Paul was the one who got the message from him first. That message was a kind of warning, like, you should know who your friend Carl really is. Then there were messages about the baseball hat. I'm fucking dead, dude. I wanted to give him the hat back, but I get blocked every time. But over time, the messages Paul received shifted in tone. They became more mean-spirited, criticizing his appearance, questioning why he would stay friends with Karl. Then Karl received this text from an unknown number. Your twink whore friend Paul should honestly be scared at this point. Warn him if you got the chance.

This is no longer just some annoying message. This is clearly a threat. This is Adam clearly building a vendetta against me and my group of friends. And it was like, okay, we all really need to look out now.

After this message and what happened to Drew at QuikTrip, Carl could no longer pretend that this was just some internet prank. The harassment had gone from annoying texts to threatening Drew's job to an ominous threat against Paul. And worse was coming. It was time to get law enforcement involved. Because Adam had recently been released from prison, he was still on probation. So Carl reached out to the Department of Corrections.

They referred me to his probation officer. And I had explained that I was getting these text messages. Drew and my friend Paul were getting these text messages, and I wanted it to stop.

The probation officer agreed to put a no-contact order in place. And yet, just days later— You don't deserve a boyfriend. You are selfish.

You are abusive.

I can't stand you, and you do not deserve happiness. I promise you that it won't last much longer. Carl fortified his home with cameras. Every night he triple-checked the locks on his doors, but that still wasn't enough to make him feel secure. The texts didn't stop, so Carl filed an official complaint with the Kenosha County Sheriff's Office. After that, nothing changed. There were now days he was getting about 2 dozen calls from random numbers. That's when Karl decided to take another step.

I had approached Drew about this idea of a restraining order. And I was like, we have to do something. We went over to the clerk of courts, and we filled out that paperwork.

Karl finally understood that the harassment would never stop on its own.

And on September 11th, 2023, We were granted the temporary restraining order. Adam was served with the paperwork, and then we were going to have a hearing in 2 weeks.

A temporary restraining order is a short-term thing used to provide protection in urgent cases. It's only in place until a judge can hold an official hearing and weigh both sides. In Carl's case, the hearing was scheduled for 2 weeks' time. Carl's best friend Paul wholeheartedly supported his decision to file for a restraining order. As a joke, he sent Carl one of his famous voice memos. In it, he fantasized about what it would be like to testify against Adam at the restraining order hearing. So, Your Honor, is that okay if I— can I speak? All right, perfect. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. I would say that a lot of the behavior really just points back to substance abuse if you think about it. I think that some form of facility is probably the best route to take, whether that's jail or whether it's some rehabilitation of some sort or a camp. I'm not entirely sure, but food for thought. At the time, this voice memo made Carl laugh. It was just Paul being Paul. bringing the levity in the darkest of situations. Carl needed that. After Carl filed the restraining order, Kenosha sheriffs looked more deeply into the case.

Try as they might, they found nothing to tie Adam, Carl's ex-boyfriend, to the harassment. There was only circumstantial evidence, like the Cubs hat, but there wasn't enough to charge Adam.

I was even more outraged because it was like How can you tell me I don't have enough to prove that this is Adam, that none of these numbers can exactly be traced to him? Yet all the text messages I got up to this point were fully acknowledging my past relationship with him.

Without more proof, Carl and Drew realized their chances of getting a restraining order were slim.

It'd be a waste of time. It was going to be a waste of money. There was no other choice than to just drop it and keep going through the process in Continuing to report what we were getting.

The day after the restraining order was dropped, Carl received a message gloating about it. Good choice forgetting about things because, you know, it'd just be a loss before even getting started. Are you ready for it?

Calls and texts are fun, but wait until it hits the fan, you piece of shit.

Carl was frustrated. Here was another threat. Another piece of evidence that Adam wasn't going to stop. On top of that, Adam was on probation. And still, the cops wouldn't do anything.

I knew what was going on around me. But, like, these systems that I was relying upon to get the bad guy and to stop the harassment from happening couldn't be reliable.

What Carl didn't know is that there was a reason the Sheriff's Department couldn't find evidence on Adam. There was something else, something much darker going on. And things were about to escalate even further. University of Texas Unit 422. Hi. I was wondering if I could have a police officer out to my address. Your first name?

Carl.

And your last name, Carl?

Bryan.

I'm Melissa Jeltzen, host of the What Happened to Her podcast. We're kicking off the season with the Sandra Birchmore story, a case the police wrote off as a suicide in a snowstorm. Her family never bought it, and the man they suspected wore a badge. You never know who that devil is because he's wearing a disguise. Sometimes it's a police uniform. And you can get access to all episodes 100% ad-free with an iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscription exclusively on Apple Podcasts, available only to iHeartTrue Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait, head to Apple Podcasts, search for iHeartTrue Crime Plus, and subscribe today. Lisa, we should tell them about our new show. Oh my God, Lexi, we have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Ioannou. We're 2 best friends, 22 years apart but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. I'm not gonna get anywhere fighting.

That is Wild.

I learned that about you today. Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, good taste is my business, and I've always got something to say. If men were just honest about this, there would be so much more peace in the world. We're going to talk about dating, relationships, beauty, getting older and a little wiser. We're best friends, but we don't always agree. Because you told us how accommodating you are, obviously I I do what I think I could do to fight the fight, but there's only so much fight I can fight.

Don't lie to me.

Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me.

Liar.

Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I don't really care. Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman.

Angela Giarratana.

Jeremy Colhane.

Patrick McDonald.

And we're the hosts of the Artist on Artist on Artist on Artist podcast. The improvised character comedy Podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

Join us for a panel of wellness influencers.

What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know, have you guys heard of faux journaling?

Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading.

So you're—

so we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay, a panel of New Yorker cartoonists.

Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class?

No!

I've been dying to! I'm so sorry.

I'm, I'm so I'm seeing a reading of Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audra McDonald at the Wonderland Bookstore on the 14th.

That's crazy! I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Norah Jones do a reading of Zero Dark Thirty.

No way!

You have to come to the Last Bookstore though. Kim Cattrall is reading the guitar tabs of Yesterday.

A panel of Eurovision participants.

And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone. You can— I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast, the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice Each week I bring on incredible guests like Conan O'Brien, Iowa Debrae, Lamorne Morris, and Nicole Byer. Ooh, I scammed them.

What?

I could talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And the scams run the gamut. I'm talking about scams from the 1800s all the way up to today. I also warn you and keep you safe against scammers. Call your grandparents. Tell your parents to stop clicking on links, please. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. If there's a scam, I'm here to protect you. And I'm also here to laugh with you. So if you like fun, if you like comedy, and you like learning and protecting yourself from criminals, start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Scam Goddess.

Sheriffs couldn't find hard evidence linking Adam to the harassment. So Carl dropped his restraining order. But he was frustrated with how long the investigation was taking.

I wanted Adam arrested. I wanted him arrested. I want this to be done, you know, because at this point, But there was no other option other than to see him behind bars again because clearly this is not a stable person.

The sheriffs assured Karl they were actively investigating. So Karl kept reporting incidents to law enforcement as they happened. It was now late September 2023, 4 months since everything started. One afternoon, Karl and Drew went to a beer garden to unwind.

We're just relaxing, and I think at one point Drew needed to get back to my house for something. And I checked my phone and saw that I got a voicemail from a different number. Hi, this is Noah from Floyd Towing. I'm here to tow the Hyundai Sonata.

The Hyundai Sonata was Drew's car, and it was parked at Carl's house. According to the tow truck driver, Carl had called them asking for Drew's car to be towed. The driver had his name and his number.

And I'm like, what the fuck? So I called Drew right away. And I won't forget this phone call because I said, Drew, a tow truck is coming to the house right now. You need to get ready and tell them it's not you. Somehow my number is being impersonated. He's like, what? And just as I'm having the phone conversation with him, he's looking outside the window and here comes the tow truck.

Drew ran out into the driveway. He told the tow truck driver that it was a fake call.

And then the tow truck takes off.

Karl rushed back to his apartment. He found Drew on the couch, visibly shaken.

Drew just sits with me for a minute or two, and he's just, like, in complete silence, breathing very heavily and trying to calm himself down and— I'm just seething. I'm like, what the fuck do we do? I'm scared. I don't know what's going on right now. It all sounds fucking crazy.

Someone was now pretending to be Carl. He didn't understand how that was possible, so he started doing some research of his own, and he found out there's a term for this kind of harassment. It's called spoofing.

I'm being targeted by spoof calls. I'm being targeted by spoof texts.

Spoofing is a common tool in scams, fraud schemes, and harassment campaigns. Someone disguises their real number and makes it appear as though a call or text is coming from a different caller. They could use a random phone number, or they could make it look like they were calling as someone specific. That's how the towing company received a call that looked like it was from Karl himself. Over the next few months, these spoof calls became a part of Karl's everyday life. He started receiving calls from other tow truck companies, locksmiths, heating and cooling technicians, plumbers.

I'm talking like the emergency vets. I'm talking about a limo service. I'm talking about a carpet company was somewhere in there. Just about anybody that you could possibly think of. These people are coming to the door and they're probably like, what the hell is going on here? And we're not talking like corporate people. We're talking about small, local, mom-and-pop-owned businesses with very limited means traveling all of that way to come to Kenosha to respond to a service request. It was happening all the time, all hours of the night into the morning. I would get waken up and it was so nerve-wracking. There was one day in particular, there was probably 3 people that showed up, and it was so exhausting that I literally had a sign on my door now. That said, if you're a plumber, if you're a tow truck, if you're a locksmith, I am being impersonated. If I need services, I'll call from a different number. Sorry for the inconvenience. It is enough to make anybody go crazy. I mean, it is enough to make anybody sick.

The constant harassment impacted Carl's relationship with Drew. They were both on edge.

Bless Drew for his role in all of this because, like, he didn't have to stay at all. He wanted to be there to support me, like he loved me, you know? But it was helpless for him too because it's like he himself had no answers. The only thing he could possibly offer was just to be another person there for me. And it was comforting, at least to that degree. But, like, in many ways it was hard for us to really, like, develop our relationship further because survival was at the top of my mind at all times.

Karl self-medicated to deal with the stress.

I was drinking heavily and making an ass of myself everywhere we went. There was one night he peeled me off the floor because I was drunk and I'd fallen over and hit my head on the air conditioner and was laying down on the floor, and he had to pick me up when he got home from work.

He came home to find you on the floor?

Yeah.

Yeah.

If I wasn't constantly hungover, I was drinking to kill the hangover. And, you know, I was just going through the entire day. And that definitely had a strain on our relationship.

Carl became more reliant on alcohol. He couldn't find peace. He was a spectator in his own life spinning out of control. His best friend Paul was there for him through it all. as a shoulder to cry on. Carl felt grateful to have a confidant like Paul.

I had somebody that I could lean on because he was experiencing what I was experiencing. He knew exactly how it felt to get a text message that was threatening in nature, to get blown up with spoof calls. It was somebody that I could feel safe with. As nobody else in the world really could relate to what it was that I was going through.

Despite battling all of this, Karl and Drew made it to a year of being together on November 4th, 2023. A pretty amazing milestone, all things considered.

We decided we were going to take a drive to Chicago to celebrate our anniversary.

Sure enough, their night out was interrupted.

Hi, this is Kerry, Patriot Towing.

I'm here to pick up your car. Once again, a towing company said they received a call from a Carl O'Brien. This was the 19th spoofed service call he received in the span of about a month.

What a way for us to spend our 1-year anniversary by dealing with this headache of a tow truck.

But the night wasn't over.

By now, Carl was spending The only thing I could really do to, like, keep myself sane was try to remove myself from my house as much as possible, just like on the off chance if some random service provider showed up.

So after dealing with the tow truck, they settled in at Drew's for the night.

Turned off my phone. The dogs were in bed with me and Drew and just went to bed. And that was probably the first normal sleep in a long time.

But in the morning, when he turned on his phone—

I see all these voicemails from the sheriff's department. And I'm like, what?

Karl also saw that he had an alert from his security camera app. There was activity recorded the night before. He hit play and he could see sheriffs at his front door.

They have the flashlights open and they're checking in the windows and they're knocking on the door and they're ringing the bell. And I'm like, what is going on?

Karl slept at Drew's place that night, which is why he didn't hear the police banging on his door. So Karl rang the Sheriff's Department. They said that just after midnight, they received a concerning call for service from Karl's phone number.

They said that apparently Drew was abusing my dogs. And I'm like, what? The dogs are with us. They are well taken care of, you know. And I said, that's not the truth. I haven't even been home. Do you have audio of this phone call?

Mesa Dispatch, Unit 422.

Hi, I was wondering if I could have a police officer out to my address. My boyfriend was, like, caught hitting my dog, and we just kind of got into, like, a little dispute.

And then what is your address?

Um, please.

And then your first name?

Carl.

And your last name, Carl?

Uh, Bryan.

All right. And then exactly what happened earlier today?

I just witnessed my boyfriend hitting my dog and like smacking him, and I told him to stop. And then it kind of just got into like a little argument between us, and I wanted him to leave, but he wouldn't.

Okay.

I'm scared, like, I don't know if he's gonna do it again or not.

Yeah, no, absolutely.

All right.

And it was only verbal, not physical at all between you two?

Between us, but yeah, just verbal.

Okay. Is he still there right now? Yes, he is. Okay. What's your boyfriend's name?

Andrew Condon.

Okay. We'll get somebody out there to take a report and kind of see what's going on. Okay? Okay.

Thank you so much.

Yes, you're welcome.

It was deeply concerning to me. Not only was my phone number being used to call tow trucks and all of that, but now also police dispatch. Like, who knows what the hell the caller is going to be capable of at this point? Like, what kind of calls they're going to be making?

Karl was at a loss about what to do next. In his time of need, he found himself relying more and more on his best friend, Paul.

We were communicating just about every day, multiple times a day. More often than not, the conversations would center on what we could do to get ahead of whatever harassment it was that we were experiencing. just to try to feel some semblance of safety.

Although Paul was also a target of the harassment, he was there for Karl, and he warned Karl phony calls to police could go very wrong.

When I was talking to Paul about this, you know, he's telling me, like, I've heard stories about fake bomb threats and people getting killed over them. And of course, immediately I'm like, oh my God, like, is this going to happen to me? Is there gonna be a fake bomb threat? threat placed in my name and is it going to result in somebody getting killed? I am scared out of my mind.

It felt like the threat of Adam was everywhere. Carl and his whole community felt like they were under attack. Carl couldn't see how this would end. And then the next message arrived. It was sent to Paul. Someone's not gonna make it out of this alive. And if you're stupid and show him this message, it just might be you.

He called me up very shaken, crying on the phone and fearing for his own safety. And when I heard him upset, it did deeply affect me.

This was a direct threat. Carl was terrified. Every new attack seemed to make the case against Adam stronger, and it was clear no one around Carl was safe. But here's the thing. The timing of the harassment, the number of texts, the threatening tone were almost too perfect. But it would be months before Carl learned the truth, that the person behind it all wasn't his ex-boyfriend Adam. It was his best friend and confidant, I knew Adam was getting out of jail, so I wanted to pose as Adam because it was an easy scapegoat. On the next episode of Betrayal.

We just got a call from a party at place, and he said someone there had a knife. And that he was in the bathroom, and this person had like— it sounded like a real deep voice. And I think his name was Carl Bryan.

If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team or want to tell us your betrayal story, email us at betrayalpod@gmail.com. That is betrayalpod@gmail.com. Or follow us on Instagram @betrayalpod, or me @itsandreagunning. To access our newsletter and additional content, and to connect with the Betrayal community, join our Substack at betrayal.substack.com. We're grateful for your support. One way to show support is by subscribing to our show on Apple Podcasts, and don't forget to rate and review. 5-star reviews go a long way. A big thank you to all of our listeners. Betrayal is a production of Glass Podcasts. a division of Glass Entertainment Group, in partnership with iHeartPodcasts. The show was executive produced by Nancy Glass, hosted and produced by me, Andrea Gunning, written and produced by Carrie Hartman and Caitlin Golden. Our story editor is Monique Laborde. Also produced by Ben Fetterman. Our production manager is Kristen Melchiorri. Our associate producer is Leah Jablow. Additional support by Curry Richmond and Olivia Hewitt. Our iHeart team is Allie Perry and Jessica Krejnczak. Audio editing and voice acting by Tanner Robbins. Mixing and mastering by Matt Del Vecchio. And special thanks to Carl Bryan, Adam Mejia, Matt Rolsey, and their communities.

Betrayal's theme composed by Oliver Baines. Music library provided by MIB Music. And for more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Bye.

I'm Melissa Geltzman, host of the What Happened to Her podcast. We're kicking off the season with the Sandra Birchmore story, a case the police wrote off as a suicide in a snowstorm. Her family never bought it, and the man they suspected wore a badge. You never know who that devil is because he's wearing a disguise. Sometimes it's a police uniform. And you can get access to all episodes 100% ad-free with an iHeart True Crime Plus subscription exclusively on Apple Podcasts, available only to iHeart True Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait, head to Apple Podcasts, search for iHeart True Crime Plus, and subscribe today. Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Ioannou. We're 2 best friends. 22 years apart but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, good taste is my business. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess The true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

Each week, I bring on an amazing guest. Ooh, I scammed him.

What?

I could talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The Scam Goddess. Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman. Angela Giarratana. Jeremy Culhane.

Patrick McDonald.

And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists The improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone.

You can—

I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeartRadio podcast. Guaranteed human.