Transcript of #2548 - Brian Simpson New

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience.

Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night. All day.

Oh yeah, I just, I just— hey, what's up, Joe? What's up, Brian? Here to promote the new special?

That's right.

Or the old special?

The old special that is now available on YouTube.

Now available on YouTube. Live from the mothership. I filmed it at the mothership.

And that has one of my all-time favorite bits in it.

What bit is that?

WAP.

Oh yeah, yeah, that's a—

That's one of my all-time favorite bits because it's such, it's such a great arc, you know. It's got a lot of detail to it and then it comes back around.

Oh yeah, I'll probably never write anything better than that.

Oh, it's a great bit. You will, you will. But it is an inspired piece of material.

You know how sometimes you're haunted by a bit where you're like, Oh yeah. And people, and every now and then somebody walk up to you and go, you know my favorite joke of yours is? And you're like, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, but it's cool. It's cool. I'm excited, man. We already at like 300,000 views.

I'm trying to get a million. Let me get a million. Help me. Well, after this, it'll boost up for sure. And it was really good. It's a great special, man. It's hard. It's hard to— a special never feels like it feels in the room 'cause you're not in the audience, you're at home. So it's always like, even a great special is like 60 to 70% of what it feels like to be there.

Oh yeah.

When you're there, it's always better. But then it's hard to be relaxed because you know that there's fucking cameras on you and you got to nail this.

You know, the analogy I use is like, it's the difference between watching porno and then watching those same 2 people have sex right in front of you. You know, it's the exact same thing that's happening.

Right, right, right. It's way crazier. People are fucking right in front of you.

Yeah, that's a whole different— it's a whole different vibe.

Right, right.

Yeah.

It's hard to get them down. You know, there's a lot of great comics that don't have a great special, and it's just— it's hard. It's hard to nail it.

I mean, it's hard to nail it. It's hard to know when to make it happen. It's hard to be in the right mind frame. Mm-hmm.

Yep. Yep, all those things.

But once you knock one out—

Yeah, once you knock one out, once you get a really good one— if you're doing— I always like to film 4 if possible, and then once you have one in the can, then you're free. Once you have one that's done, you're like, all right, this is all a regular show now. Now I can be free.

Well, that's the advice you gave me before. I'm glad I did that too. But it was funny is the first one was the one where you end up using it.

Because you're inspired, but also there's less pressure. You don't feel—

You have more chance.

Yes. So you're free. You're free, you're inspired. It's just when you have to do one. Like, there's a lot of great specials like Bill Hicks' Relentless, the one he did in London. God, it feels like he's tense. It doesn't feel— it doesn't feel, like, loose, like, relaxed. It feels like he's very aware he's being filmed.

You think he only shot the one?

I think so. Yeah, 'cause it was a huge theater, you know? And back then, that's what they used to do. Back then, people would shoot one special. They would film one show, you know?

That feels—

that's—

Crazy. I remember when I first started doing 2 days, people were like, God, that's gonna cost you so much more. Better that. Better that. Have peace of mind.

Oh yeah.

But then what did I do? I went and did a live one, so.

That I would never do. That scares the shit out of me.

Scares the shit out of me too. That's why I did it. I wanted to see what it's like. If I could do it. It felt like a regular show. It felt like a total regular show.

Yeah, you prefer that?

It's exciting. There's something thrilling about it. Also, I hate editing. I don't want to watch myself. I hate it. I don't want to watch any of my shit. It's good to watch because you get disgusted with yourself and you fix things.

That was the hardest part for me.

It's hard.

Is, uh, yeah, I mean, film— all the filming stuff took care of itself, but I didn't— I don't think I turned in the final one till like 4 months later.

Duncan filmed one a long time ago. He still not— hasn't done anything with it.

Yeah.

He's like, I don't want to look at it.

It's hard, man. And the thing is, what you understand is like the longer you go, the harder it is.

Oh yeah.

Because you you are a different person.

Right.

You know, and you look, you're judging yourself. You're looking back like the sound of your voice, the mistakes you made, the way your hands are moving, the tag you thought of after you've wrapped the set. You know, it's like all—

That's the biggest torture.

Oh yeah.

Those are the torturous ones. It's almost like the moment you film, you have to abandon it.

If you really wanna fuck with a comic, give them a great tag after they done filming their special. Like, I know you can't use this.

Yeah.

So Jamie, what were you telling me about Moses, I tell you, we got to save that. Holy shit, is it hot in here or is it me?

It's a little warm.

Let me check that first.

Um, but I was outside.

But you know, I just, um, I just—

It's not bad, 62.

I just read something about this, uh, um, the CTE Foundation. They just, they just released a study. They basically, they, um, they got every NFL player that died between 2016 and 2021. It was like 800 of them or something like that, and they asked their families to donate their brains. So they— the families donated about a quarter of— about a quarter of the family said yes, and, and like 90-plus percent of the brains had CTE.

Yeah.

So, so the best they can say for sure is that about a quarter of all those NFL players have CTE, because they— it's, it's definitely more than that because that's all they gave them. Right.

So, but out of the quarter, 90%?

Over 90%.

Yeah, you know, they've found CTE in high school kids.

Well, that's— yeah, that's, that's the next one.

High school, high school football, all the way up. High school, college.

Can I, can I send it to you, Jamie?

I got it. I got it because Adam Schefter tweeted it and like worded it weirdly and people got mad about that, but Yeah, man, that's spooky.

Sometimes I see like an old fighter on Twitter just screaming into the wind, and I'm like, what is that guy going through?

There's a study in the British Medical Journal that came out like this week or last week.

What were we just looking at? We're just looking at something different?

It was on ESPN.

Oh, study: at least 25% of NFL players in sample had CTE. So 878 players that appeared in one, at least one NFL game, and died in a 6-year period, at least 25% had CTE. So this is, um, this study drew on samples donated between 2008 and 2021, 93% of which have been diagnosed with CTE, then narrowed the sample based on when donations were highest and factored the demographic data and information from death certificates. The estimate of 25% is on the low end.

Yeah.

Said Dr. Daniel Denyshevar, the study's lead author. The study found the maximum possible prevalence of CTE was around 97%, but the true rate is somewhere in the middle.

Yeah, that 3% is just the kickers.

Yeah, right.

Mm-hmm, right. It's gotta be.

Yeah, right. Like everybody else is getting hit. There's no way. Who's that guy that got diagnosed with CTE?

Over here?

Yeah.

I don't know if he's current.

So the thing is, these guys are getting diagnosed now while they're alive, and not just CTE, but, um, Is it MS?

What did Chris— what's C2K have? Chris Johnson, he was a— is it MS, I think?

It's the thing that people put ice bucket challenge. ALS? ALS.

Oh Jesus. That's what Stephen Hawking had.

There's also a high prevalence of that.

Oh my God. A high prevalence of ALS. But again, makes sense. You're getting hit in the head all the time. All sorts of things are probably going haywire up there. Yeah, I mean, the amount of times these guys get hit. So everybody thinks about concussion, but subconcussive head trauma is just as bad.

What is subconcussive?

Where you don't get a concussion, you just get banged in the head and you think you're okay because you don't have a concussion, but you're still doing damage.

Oh yeah.

You know who gets CTE? soccer players from heading the ball.

Oh yeah, I bet.

How crazy is that?

Thousands and thousands and thousands of times.

But you would never imagine that a rubber ball could hurt your brain. You would think, it's fine, boink, it doesn't even hurt.

You know what's weird is that— what's weird is how okay it is to make fun of it.

Of CTE?

Yeah, it's become the new R-word. You know, where it's like, it's like you can just say, you like, CTE is the punchline.

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Feels bad for brutish men.

Yeah, nobody feels bad for brutish men. People always feel bad for women. That's why this lady killed her kids and everyone's like, oh my God, she needed help. Imagine if a single father killed his kids. Do you think there'd be any dads out there, we get it, we understand?

Absolutely.

I also get sad, bro.

I said I should put the joke out, but I said it on stage yesterday. But I— but when I— so I don't follow this news, so when I first heard it— so basically she, she strangled her 3 kids.

Yeah.

Right. And then she tried to kill herself. She cut her throat and her wrist, and then she jumped out the window.

Didn't do a good job.

Right. She, she failed. She ended up paralyzed. And I said And this is— I just said, I feel like she doesn't have good problem-solving skills because you was 3 for 3 on the strangulation, and then when you try to kill yourself, you using unproven methods. You— why would you— why not strangle yourself? You, you are definitely good at that.

Yeah, hang yourself.

Yeah, she— so I don't know if she really wanted to. I don't know.

She looks fucking crazy. I mean, you can't tell looking in someone's eyes Really, they're under stress. They're in court. They're gonna be going to jail for the rest of their life, most likely. So there's a lot of stress, but boy, does she look crazy.

But when you're dealing with somebody that's out of it, you could tell.

But she chased her son down. She chased him down to strangle him. He ran away from her.

Did she say that?

It's in the case.

Oh, man.

You know, I think if those ladies could see the crime scene and see those dead kids with their fucking vacant eyes staring up 'cause their mother took their life, the last fucking thing that they saw was their mother standing over them, choking them to death. I don't think they would feel so bad.

I think everybody that's saying free, free Lindsay—

People are out of their fucking mind right now.

If she get free, they should have to let her babysit.

She's out of her fucking mind. The world is out of its fucking mind. It's like more of these things come up where you're like, this can't be real, this can't be real, and it is real. More of these things where you're like, people are showing up in support of a woman who killed her children.

I don't care how rough it was.

The ability to kill your children is crazy. That's a level of crazy that anyone who has kids, you know how much you love them, what you would do to save them, what you do to protect them from harm. The idea that you can get to a point where you could strangle your kids and chase your son— make sure that's true, that she chased her son down. Pretty sure it's true.

People are making up conspiracies that it was actually the husband. You know, like, that's how badly they want her to not be responsible, even though she's already admitted it.

Well, like, I think there's conspiracies about every fucking thing that's ever existed. There's so many morons out there with a hot take, including me. There's a lot of dumbasses that have terrible hot takes. Not me.

I'm pretty much always right. I'm pretty much always on the money.

Did you take the COVID vaccine?

Uh, yeah, a few times.

All right, then shut the fuck up.

Oh, you think we— you still don't believe in vaccines?

Not that one.

Oh, not that one. That one didn't do a goddamn thing.

That one didn't do a goddamn thing. It didn't protect you from transmission. It didn't protect you from infection, and it opened you up to a host of different problems.

Got me a long vacation though.

The—

Yeah, I think we need another one. We need another pandemic. I wanna stay in the house for 6 months.

Just stay in the house for 6 months. Look, if that's what you like to do, then just do it.

Yeah, but I don't wanna feel guilty about it.

Ah, so you're willing— you're like Fauci. You wanna sacrifice the entire world for your own benefit.

What did he get out of it though?

A lot of fear right now. That's what he got. That guy doesn't sleep right now. You could see the look on his face when he had to testify and plead the Fifth. He feels the weight of what he did, 'cause the world knows what he did now.

But what did he do?

Well, first of all, he funded gain-of-function research when it's illegal. So when they— when Obama put a stop to it, he went through the EcoHealth Alliance and they backdoored it. And they funded this creation of these new viruses. They take a virus and make it more transmissible and more dangerous. What's the purpose of that? Who knows? Okay, there's a lot of people that think it's weapons, and that this is biological weapons research, and what they're trying to do is develop specific targeted viruses that they can inflict on a population. We know they have done that before. They've experimented with like certain bugs and infect these bugs with diseases and then drop them out of helicopters onto a civilization so that it wipes out people and wipes out their medical system. Everybody gets sick. They know they did that on Plum Island, which is right near where Lyme, Connecticut is, and that's the suspicion where Lyme disease came from. Lyme disease— this is why it's called Lyme disease, because it first started— people started being diagnosed with it in Lyme, Connecticut, and it's literally like like a hop, skip, and a jump from Plum Island, where they do this fucking research on bugs, where they take bugs and infect them with different diseases to make them, you know, so they can use them in warfare.

That's the idea. The idea was that they would— say if we're going to war with a country, you fly overhead, dump all these bugs that are infected, people get bit, it starts to spread, gets in the other bugs, their medical system gets overwhelmed, and their fighting age population gets overwhelmed.

Mmm.

Scary shit, man. These motherfuckers have been doing this kind of research for a long time. But it's like, look, if you're a comedian, you— your phone's ringing. If you're a comedian, you tell jokes. If you're a fucking researcher, you do research. And if your research is gain-of-function research, to me— and by the way, they never came up with a cure for any of these things. They— by— the idea is we're gonna study these diseases, then make them more transmissible so we understand how to prevent infection and how to how to cure people. They didn't have a cure. When COVID got released, they had no fucking idea what to do. The whole thing was a mass fuck-up, either on purpose or by accident, but either way, Fauci lied, and he lied through the entire media thing. First of all, he lied about the miscarriage risk for women in the first trimester in a text message.

You gonna have them all?

Yeah, for sure. In a text message, he talked about how the cytokine storm during the first trimester seems to— there seems to be a signal that indicates a higher risk of miscarriage. And then months later, he's on TV telling, it's totally safe for pregnant women. In fact, it's more risky for you to get COVID.

What's the cytokine storm? What does that mean?

Cytokine storm is a reaction to the vaccine. And I don't know the specifics, but I know that this is exactly how he described it. And that particularly during the first trimester, I mean, it's like a high-risk of miscarriage. It's very high. A lot— I know 5 women that had miscarriages when they— after they got vaccinated. They got pregnant, got vaccinated, had a miscarriage.

And then—

And he knew about it. He fucking knew about it and lied. He lied about the transmission. He lied about the, uh, the risk for children. He lied about everything. The necessity for children to get vaccinated, he lied about that. No, 'cause Biden gave him a full pardon for all crimes that he may have committed from 2014 to 2024. He gave him a 10-year pardon for the first time ever where someone's been pardoned where they're not convicted of a crime. Usually when you're pardoned, it's like, you know, you did a little of this, you did a little of that, you went to jail for tax evasion or whatever. And then the guy gets in and goes, ah, he donated to the Democrats or he donated to the Republicans and he's a good guy. I'm leaving office. I'm gonna let this guy out. And people go like, hey, How did he get out? They yell for a couple days, then it goes away, and then you live in Florida. That's normal.

Right.

But this is different. This is different. He pardoned a bunch of members of his family that had not been convicted of any crime or even accused of any crimes. He pardoned his son. He pardoned— the Fauci one's the big one though, because that's 10 fucking years. For 10 fucking years from 2014, which is when Obama put the moratorium on gain-of-function research. Obama came in, it's like, what the fuck are you doing? Like, why are we making viruses more dangerous? No, we're not spending money on this. Obama stopped it. And then when the Trump adminis— and he kept doing it through EcoHealth Alliance, but then when the Trump administration came along, it was all fucking chaos in 2016. And it's very important that we do research on these viruses to make sure that we're protected. And so Trump is like, sounds good, I like it, and then it gets through.

Hmm.

I don't know exactly if that happened.

What?

He's researching it real good.

I know that Obama— I know Obama put a moratorium on it in 2014. I know he's accused of going through the EcoHealth Alliance to fund gain-of-function research at the Wuhan Institute.

Is he in the Epstein files?

I don't think so. He likes killing people, he doesn't like fucking them. Well, guys, he's a scary dude. He's a scary dude, man. I mean, this is the same dude during the AIDS crisis that was giving people AZT, which killed people quicker than cancer when they were using it as a chemotherapy drug. They stopped using it as a chemotherapy drug because it was killing people quicker than the cancer was, but it was already approved. So when AIDS came along, they're like, look, instead of going through this long trial to come up with a medication, and you have to go 5 years, all this fucking shit you have to do to get FDA approval, we've got a drug already. Let's just start using that. And they started using AZT. a toxic chemotherapy drug, and they used it for people that were asymptomatic. So people who had no symptoms, but they tested positive for HIV, they gave 'em AZT, and they were dead in 6 months.

I wonder why didn't we lock down for that? We— if we'd all stopped fucking for like a year and a half, we would've got AIDS up outta here.

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You talking about the guy that, uh, he, he was, uh, bone marrow transplant?

No, no, no.

He— Earlier this year, January.

Earlier this year. Should have had him back on again. I had him on early in the day and people got so mad at me. So he's a professor of biology at the University of California, Berkeley, tenured professor, so they couldn't fire him. And, um, but lost all his research grants, lost everything, because during the AIDS crisis he pointed out that all these people that are in the gay community that are suffering from you know, air quote AIDS, are also hardcore drug users. They're all party drug users. They're all using amyl nitrate and crystal meth, and they're all— they're destroying their immune system with this stuff, and then they get HIV. His contention was that HIV— and I don't know if this is true, I'm sure a lot of people disagree, but I'm just saying what he believed. His contention was that HIV was actually not responsible for AIDS, but was in fact a weak virus that was only showing up in the immune system systems of people that were already compromised. So these people were severely compromised because they were heavy drug users, and that's what was fucking up their immune system. That's what was fucking up their life.

So he said that in the '80s?

Oh yeah, there's tons of articles. I mean, he printed it. I think, God, it was like, was it Spin magazine that had this whole thing about it? He wrote books on it, but he was basically rendered persona non grata. He was basically lost all his grants, didn't have any— you know, no students wanted to study under him. He was a pariah because of his position. They said it was homophobic, they said all these crazy things, but he was saying, look, it has nothing to do with gay or straight. What I'm telling you is this group of people that you're attributing this disease to also are hardcore drug users. You're not seeing this— like when they say AIDS in Africa, do you think they're testing all those people for HIV with a fucking— with a PCR test? No.

No.

They're malnourished. They're dying of starvation.

So you— so his theory is that you have to already have a weakened—

Exactly.

For your HIV to progress to AIDS.

Exactly. He was saying the reason why these people have HIV is not because they have— HIV's killing them, they have AIDS. Their immune system is already destroyed, so that's why HIV is not fought off by the body. It's very weird because he's full of shit. Okay, we know he's full of shit. He's a liar. He's a proven liar. He lied about the gain-of-function research. He lied about the transmission, lied about the infection, the potential of the vaccine to stop infection and transmission. He lied about how deadly it was for kids. He lied about the death rate.

There's proof from all of this. I remember when you sent me that book. It was like, I forget who wrote that book.

Which one? RFK Jr.? The Real Anthony Fauci?

Was that a book you sent me? Like, this was like during the pandemic or right after the pandemic. You gotta read this.

Probably. That was it.

Yeah.

Yeah, you should listen to the audio version. It's really good.

I just don't think he's that interesting. Who? Fauci? Yeah, because he's not—

Well, here's something that should interest you. He used this AIDS vaccine on foster kids in New York and killed them.

Really?

Yes, they experimented on foster children in New York State and killed them with this vaccine that he was trying. He was trying to develop a vaccine for air quotes AIDS, and in doing so, he killed a bunch of kids.

So why they can't put him in prison for that?

No one's chasing after him for that.

Mm-hmm.

No one's chasing after him for anything other than the most recent thing. But the more you dig into this guy, and if you read The Real Anthony Fauci by RFK Jr., that book is fucking horrifying.

They start locking people up for what they did to foster children, there's gonna be a lot of motherfuckers going to prison.

Right.

Yeah, I bet you that's where they start experimenting.

Of course, they have no parents. They have no parents and they're children and they can't say shit. No one's gonna believe them.

They didn't know better and they tell them, oh, this is gonna make you feel better.

Exactly. Yeah, and they're probably already troubled. So, you know, and they probably already have health problems because they're probably not getting good nutrition. They're probably under stress all the time. And fuck, man, their parents were probably drug addicts or alcoholics. That's a distinct possibility. It's fucking— the book is horrible. And I always say, look, if it's not true, why hasn't anybody sued him?

That's a good point.

I mean, he's the head of HHS now. I mean, I don't think he's wrong. And I had the same opinion of him that a lot of people have. You don't think who's wrong? RFK Jr.

Oh.

I don't think he's wrong. I think, I think it's very well researched. I think he's telling the truth about all this. And when I was, you know, a quote-unquote liberal, when I was living in California, I thought he was a kook when he was talking about vaccines and all this. I thought he was just an anti-vaccine, anti-science nutter that also happened to be a Kennedy.

See, that's how I feel about him.

Because you don't pay attention to what he says.

That is a good point. Yeah, because it's hard to listen to. Yeah, it's hard to listen to him talk. All of you hear his voice.

Yeah, but the thing is the book is written, written, and then someone else reads it. So it's not he— that would be torture.

You talk like that and then you say some crazy shit. Yeah, you sound like, like a— yeah, exactly, like a troll or something.

Well, the thing about him that's really interesting is he was a well-respected guy for the longest time because he was an environmental attorney. And what he was doing was stopping corporations from polluting rivers. He's responsible for cleaning up the East River in New York State, in New York City.

Mm-hmm.

He's literally responsible for that. He held those, he went to court, he held those people accountable, made them clean it up. He was a legit guy. And then these women kept showing up at some of these events that he had where he would give speeches on the toxic poisons, mercury in the ground, all these different things that are the problems of pollution that enters into communities. And these ladies started saying, you need to look at mercury in vaccines. And he was like, what? Fucking crazy bitches.

I'm not listening.

And like, this woman literally showed up and said, I'm not leaving unless you read this. And he's like, all right, well, let me, let me look at it. And then he started looking in, he was like, holy fuck. And then when you see the, the— when they rate— first of all, the biggest mistake they ever did Was give these vaccine manufacturers complete immunity.

So is he the reason we don't use mercury in the vaccines anymore?

Oh, I don't know. I don't know. Well, they use a different kind of mercury, and then they started using them. They use methylmercury and ethylmercury. I forget which one. And one of them, they said it leaves the body quicker. But the problem with that is it also crosses the blood-brain barrier. Look, any amount of mercury is bad. Then they started using aluminum. You know, the way— do you know how a vaccine works?

I mean, generally.

Roughly.

Yeah.

Yeah, so you have an inert virus, and then you have an irritant, and the irritant is like aluminum, and your body reacts to that and then recognizes the virus and builds immunities towards that virus, the dead virus that's in the vaccine. And they were using mercury as this irritant, as this thing that causes this immune response, and mercury is fucking Terrible for you.

Did you see the thing? They, um, they just found something. It's gonna be— it potentially could be the first, uh, the first thing in history to be the, to be the cure and its own, its own vaccine. They found like frog venom.

Yes.

Oh no, I'm sorry. No, bacteria in a frog's gut.

Yes.

Uh, something americanus. I forget what it is.

Here's one thing important before we get off the vaccine, uh, autism thing. The guy who wrote the study that's often quoted about vaccines not causing autism just got arrested for fraud.

The guy that's often quoted?

So the scientist whose paper they quote when they say, here's the proof that vaccines don't cause autism, pull— see if you can find that article. He just got arrested for fraud.

What kind of fraud?

We're gonna find out. But people around Fauci, this is what's interesting, that don't have a pardon from Biden are going— are getting arrested now. And that's interesting. They're being tried and they're being charged.

Hmm.

So it's going to get weird. And that guy, he feels the heat. Autism vaccine researcher arraigned in the United States. Danish physician co-authored work demonstrating no links between childhood vaccines and autism. And what is he arraigned for? Co-authored key papers demonstrating no links between childhood vaccines and autism, was arraigned on federal wire fraud and money laundering charges after his extradition from Germany, the Department of Justice said. He was a co-author of a 2002 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine that offered strong evidence based on a cohort of 500,000 Danish children that refuted the hypothesis that measles, mumps, and rubella vaccination Caused autism.

Who hasn't done a little money laundering?

Yeah, he's a dirty guy, and he probably was getting paid to make that study. And that— there's a long history of scientists doing that, all the way back to the scientists that were paid off by the sugar industry to show that it was cholesterol and saturated fat that was causing heart attacks and not sugar. They pay these guys $50,000.

That's it?

That's it. In like whatever year it was. And these guys fucked us up.

Man, you can get a couple senators for $50,000.

Oh, you get a lot of people. Yeah, you get a lot of people for $100K, $50K.

That's the right amount.

Well, what have they done here in Texas with the fucking THC ban? Who's asking for that when 70% of the state wants it to be legal? And somehow or another they made it illegal, and the alcohol lobby is involved and they've been losing money. You know, alcohol companies are losing money right now. People are drinking a lot less.

Texas runs on drugs. It's crazy, the people that pretend like— pretend otherwise. It's like everyone's always on something.

Well, if they're not on something illegal, they're on something legal. And that's where it gets weird. Like, who decides what's legal and what's not legal?

Like, all the border states get high.

Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, not— I mean, all the states get high, but the border states especially. That's where the drugs are coming in.

Listen, you could just go to the doctor and say, I can't concentrate, and they'll give you Adderall.

Yeah.

It's so easy to get Adderall.

They'll put you on some powerful shit.

They'll put you on speed. You can crush it up and snort it, and it's totally legal.

Yeah. I mean, half the college kids, they on Adderall and check.

Half the high school kids. High school kids are saying they have ADD and they're getting Adderall. I know this for a fact.

Well, the thing is, I do have it, but I don't— I can't take that shit. It fucks me up.

What do you mean you have ADD?

I've been— I was diagnosed with that shit when I was like—

What does that even mean?

I don't know.

I don't even think it's real.

But all— every time they tried to give me medicine for it, I was like, I don't like this.

I think it's just you think different than other people. That's all it is. And you, you're bored with stupid stuff that you don't want to pay attention to, but you could focus like a motherfucker when you like something, right?

Oh yeah, yeah, it's a superpower when I like something or when there's a sense of urgency, right? If it's like, oh, it's gotta happen right now.

Yeah, yeah, when you actually have to do something other than you have some shitty job where they tell you what to do, like, fuck this. Oh, you have ADD, you can't focus.

No, but yeah, the problem is, yeah, I don't have a problem focusing. I just— it's just what I can focus on.

Yeah, exactly.

It's like, if it doesn't— if it's not interesting to me, then I'm gonna That's not a disease, man. It depends on who you ask.

That's the problem.

You know, it's a disease when your boss wants you to do something. What the fuck is wrong with him? You know?

I got ADD.

Or when I gotta fill out an application. I'm telling you that if you had to fill out a form to get into heaven, I'm gonna be burning up in hell. I hate paperwork. Like, I just can't fucking do it. I just can't fucking do it.

Yeah, that's not ADD.

Like, I've really gotta— I've really got— well, no, this is just a separate pet peeve of mine. I really can't Because it's always for no reason. It's always someone asking you information that they already have, right? They'll mail a form to your house and you got to put your address on it.

I get crazy when I go somewhere and like you want to buy a tire or something like that and they want— can you give us your email address? Like, no.

So you don't believe in ADD at all?

No.

You just don't think most people have it?

No, I think most people just don't want to concentrate on the things that are boring to them, and I don't think that's a disease. I think, listen, you could use a little discipline. It'd probably be good to learn how to count. There's some stuff that's good, but the, the actual disease— what does that mean?

It's a disorder, not a disease. Okay, kind of different.

Okay, disorder. But even a disorder, by whose standards? By society's standards, it wants you to have a boring-ass job that you don't like or concentrate in boring-ass classes that you're not enjoying. He can't concentrate, he's got ADD. The fucking class is boring. I bet if you get that kid in front of a video game, he can concentrate like a motherfucker.

They probably call it a disorder because most people don't have that problem.

I don't think most people don't have it. I think a lot of people have it. Yeah? Yeah, I think if you go to the doctor, they'll tell you you have it.

Like, even the kids that get they ass beat, they still can't focus. Like, you know, they call it— they let your mama come in class and watch you.

Yeah, but they're just bored, man. They're bored. It's not a disease. If you give those kids something they like, like a game that they like, I bet if there's a sport they like to do, I bet they love that. I bet they're like focused on that. School is fucking boring. It's boring and it's frustrating for children that are filled with energy to have to sit down.

I remember this guy I used to listen to. What was his name? Tom Hartmann, I think. But he— I remember hearing him talk about a school they had way back in the day in the Northeast that would— like before they started calling it ADHD, but they would go get these kids that couldn't focus and they would put them all in this one school and they taught completely differently. Like they would let you They would let them kind of just do— like, if they had a question, that's when they would learn whatever they needed to learn to answer that question. They didn't— it wasn't like a super structured curriculum. So they got to only do what they were interested in, and they would have to learn the basics before they could, you know, finish whatever they were actually interested in. And it worked out. I don't know why— I forget why it ended up getting shut down, but it was almost like Professor X's Academy. You know, they would go find these weird kids and bring them all to this one place.

Mm-hmm.

But that, like you said, it doesn't fit into the standardized— you know, school isn't for you to fucking get smart. It's to teach you how to be a worker.

Exactly. And it was developed by the Rockefellers for that specific reason.

Really?

Yeah, it was engineered to turn you into a worker. It's not to educate you the most effective way possible. It's to make sure that you can get a job. It's like they just want to turn you into someone they can use.

Well, then now they're shipping all the jobs overseas.

The problem with whenever the pharmaceutical drug companies are involved, they have such a grip on the media media and such a grip on the medical establishment. There's so much money involved that they will come up with disorders that they need to medicate you for because they're extremely profitable. And that's the problem.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, but that's every industry.

But it doesn't mean Adderall's not awesome. I bet it's great.

This is like— I feel like the world is just a series of scams. There's a lot of that. It's like, whatever scam are you, are you in on? Yeah, I mean, everything's kind of a scam.

No, no, everything.

No, we are—

farms aren't a scam.

We're a nation of scammers.

You give people money, they give you eggs. That's not a scam. There's a lot of things that aren't scams.

I mean, yeah, yeah, I guess. I mean, listen, if you could buy eggs directly from the farmer, then you're not— you're not getting scammed.

The thing about money and power is at the highest levels, like when you get into government, when you get into enormous corporations that can affect government, then you're gonna get a lot of scams because they're just trying to make as much money as possible. That's the problem.

Like, I don't think, I don't think it was ever intended for, for like, for politician to be like your job, for senator to be like lifetime.

Lifetime. Crazy. And then all of a sudden you, you have hundreds of millions of dollars through a method no one could really explain, why you're so good at the stock market.

Yeah. And all your— and, and if I just, if I just follow all your— mirror all your stock trades perfectly. Yeah. Yeah.

Regardless of party, somehow I get You ever talk to DeRosa about it?

No.

DeRosa used to work for the Senate in Texas, and he's got crazy stories, crazy stories about how much money these people are getting. Donations and this and that, and go and do this and go and do that, and getting paid to do this and paid to do that. That's most of what their job is, is fundraising and collecting money from people.

Oh yeah, and I, and I made the mistake of— because I, you know, I never give politicians money. money, like ever. It just doesn't make sense to me to give rich motherfuckers money. They like, I need your money. I need money, right? I need you to go get me— but I don't donate to them hardly ever. And I made a mistake. I sent a politician money recently, and I— and then they just, they just never stop asking.

Mm.

Just every week. Like, you, as soon as you put your email down, they just— from every week, they're like, guys, we need— I just need one more dollar. I was like, I'm not giving you no fucking They were trying to—

they were trying to raise money for the Democratic Party right after Kamala lost. They were sending out emails.

Well, they're always all in constant— that's what— that's why the political parties need to constantly keep you scared, because that's the only way they can make sure you give them money. They tell you the sky is falling. If we can't defeat them, it's the end of the world.

Yeah, yeah, it's a dirty business, man.

Yeah, there's people, there's people that are, that are struggling that are still giving politicians money.

Have you seen those people that aren't really giving politicians money, but they're listed as giving politicians money and they think it's like NGO money, that they funneled money through you pretending that these people are donating money and so they can use NGO money and then funnel it into these political parties, and then they knock on these people's doors and they say, hey, did you donate $25,000 to the Democratic Party? And they're like, no, like, I don't have $25,000. But they donated at one point in time many, many years ago. So they have their name on a list. What's the NGO? Non-governmental organization. So this is one of the things that Doge, when Elon came in and like cleaned up all this USAID stuff, this is part of what was going on, as a lot of it is just money laundering. You're taking a bunch of government funds, and you have all these different non-government organizations that get money from the government, and then the money's moving in this very cyclical way. And one of the ways they think they were doing it was finding a bunch of people on these lists of people that had donated before and then attributing money to them that they never donated.

So if you gave them $5, they would say you gave $100?

Well, they weren't even given any money, but they were using— because they don't get like a receipt, So they just said, oh, Billy Smith donated $25,000, and then they knock on Billy Smith's door. Did you donate $25,000 to the Republicans? Like, fucking no. What are you talking about?

Mm-hmm.

So they were just using the fact that they had this guy on a list. They had all this money that Elon was talking about, billions and billions and billions of dollars. It was written that they have no receipts for. They have no idea where it went. And some of that is like moving around. Some of it's going to Ukraine.

I bet you that motherfucker got a rude awakening. Because I actually, I remember talking to you about this on here, about when he first started doing it. I was like, as soon as he start fucking with that real money, he gonna be up out of there.

Oh yeah.

I thought it was gonna happen when he went to the Pentagon. But it's like, as soon as you start, you can't, you're not allowed to fuck with the real scams.

Right.

You can do the surface stuff. You can do stuff that helps poor people. But you can't, if you start fucking with rich people money, they gonna get your ass gone.

Well, he was saying that when you get into like the Medicaid fraud, he was legitimately worried that he was gonna get killed because there was so much money. There's so much fraud.

You know, you don't hear him talking about that shit no more, do you?

Well, you know what? It cost his company a lot of money. It cost his political reputation. There was a lot, a lot of people turned on him after that where he was like a free speech freedom fighter before that. And, you know, and this guy who was just like You know, people loved him. They loved the fact that he's, he's our modern-day Nikola Tesla. He's the guy who's making electric cars and rockets and all these different things.

Yeah, I think that he's gonna learn, like, getting in bed with politicians is gonna always fuck you over because they use people. They don't give a— they're not your friends.

That's true.

Yeah, as soon as you ain't useful no more, they throw you in the fucking trash.

But if you don't get in bed with them, somebody else does, and then you get fucked. And that's what people get scared of. They're like, well, listen, there's a reality here. If I can affect it in a positive way, I probably should. And the USAID thing was wild because, you know, you think of USAID and you think of it— you ever— you know who Mike Benz is?

Nah.

I'll send you some shit if you're interested. But he's the most— he's done the most extensive work on USAID. And what he basically said was USAID was for things that were too dirty for the CIA. And a lot of it is regime change overseas. So you think of USAID as aid, right?

Right.

It's not. It's Agency for International Development. It's a regime change organization. It funds rebel groups in other countries. It funds rebel groups that are—

So it's like a— it's a front?

It's a front, yeah. And it's not just one front. USAID funds who knows how many NGOs, who knows how many non-governmental organizations. India has some fucking insane number of NGOs. The number of NGOs are so crazy. It's like one for every million people in India, and there's a billion people in India. So it might be crazier than that. It's crazy how many NGOs there are. So there's so many companies, it's— or so many non-government organizations, it's so hard to keep track of it all. Again, I'm butchering this. I don't have the facts available at my fingertips, but I could send you some of the Mike Bent stuff.

But the purpose of the NGO is to funnel money.

Funnel money. Okay, not always. I mean, some of them are sure— I'm sure actual charities. There's good people out there that are involved in charity. You know, there's, there's good organizations. Sea Shepherd's awesome. They're awesome.

What do they do?

Those are the people that are trying to prevent whaling, trying to bust people whaling, because like some countries, there's a way they can get around whaling by saying it's for research. I think Japan does that, and they bust them, and then they're using them commercially. They kill whales, and these guys do a great job. I mean, there's, there's, there's real charitable organizations that are real doing real philanthropy, the real good people out there. But then there's also scumbags, and they realize that there's a lot of this money flowing around, you know, for aid. That's what you kept hearing. Oh, these children are starving. Listen, man, you need to look at what the real money was going towards, and you'd freak out. You'd freak out. A lot of his regime change—

You seen that meme of the guy that was like, corruption is not bad. And only when I am not involved. You know what I'm talking about?

No.

He's like—

Who's that? Idi Amin?

No, no, I don't even— I don't think he was a famous dictator or whatever. He was just like this African politician. He was just saying, just telling people on the news like corruption is not bad.

Let me hear this dude. Yes, let me hear it.

Start it over.

If I'm part of that corruption and the corruption is not bad, Corruption is only bad if I'm not involved.

Yes, but if I'm part of that corruption, I'll defend it.

Okay, he's not talking about him. I guarantee you that guy is talking about people who are corrupt who defend corruption.

Really?

I think they're taking him out of context. I don't think he's really saying that.

You know what's funny? I've actually never looked into it.

If I thought about that, I— that guy doesn't look like a scumbag the way he's saying it. it to me, just my instinct. I could be wrong.

Who is he, Jamie?

You know, watch him, he's a massive thief. Totally wrong.

Human rights activist Samson Owimba Ojaiyo.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. But thank you. What was the— what's the context of that quote?

Listen, he's a human rights activist. Let's leave it at that. Let's move on.

Longer speech.

Yes, he used irony. Thank you. Exaggerated rhetoric to criticize self-serving attitudes towards That's what I thought. That's what I thought immediately by the way he was saying it. My instincts.

Damn, okay, you called it.

Yeah, I was like, that guy does not seem like a scumbag. That guy seems like a guy who's just fed up with corruption. The way he's saying it is not like, I am corrupt, you give me the money. That's not how he's saying it. What he was saying was, it's people will defend corruption if they're involved. And I think he's right.

Yeah, I think that's—

yeah, well, the thing is, like, basically how it go, it's motivations, man. And when you see people getting rich around you You see all these other politicians that are getting fucking filthy stinking rich, and you are struggling to pay your mortgage, and you're struggling to put your kids into a good school system. You're struggling to make your fucking lease on this nice car that you get to drive. You're struggling. And then you see these other motherfuckers and you go, well, it's not— it's kind of good anyway and bad. I'll get the good done. I'll do a little bit of the shenanigans, but, but we'll get it. It's good for the district. The next thing you know, you got a corporation in there union busting, you know.

And you're walking out of Epstein's house, he's like, she's 12, we got you on tape, we need this and this and this passed.

Or not even 12, it's just someone other than your wife, you know, or someone who you talked to, you know, that you didn't realize was a Russian spy, and you are some sort of a politician, you're bragging. That's one thing they catch. Well, that James O'Keefe guy—

I don't know who that is.

Damn, Brian, you're so uninformed.

Yeah, man, I know. I really mind my business on a level that you wouldn't believe.

Oh, I know. I like it. I like that you like that.

Yeah, I mean, because— and also, you know what it is? It keeps me having fresh— like, it keeps me having uncorrupted takes because so much now when you get told the news, you also get told how you're supposed to feel about it.

Right, but that's how you were about USAID and RFK Jr.

Yeah.

Do you know who Fang Fang is, Brian?

No.

You know?

Fang Fang is the lady that was banging the guy who wanted to be the governor of California. You don't know that whole scandal?

Nah, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. That's the lady that—

She was a Chinese spy.

That her husband died and she went back to China?

Nope.

No, that's Mitch McConnell, and he's not even dead. He's alive. That motherfucker dead.

He did.

He's alive, and there's photos of him holding a newspaper.

Look at me, the newspaper today. This is today's newspaper. I watched him die halfway in a news conference.

Did you see the video of him sitting on the Senate floor, not moving at all for hours and hours and hours at a time while everybody's moving around him?

No.

I sent you that, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Watch this. This is crazy. He's on the Senate floor for 20 hours.

Well, I've seen a lot.

And there's like 6 hours of him Motionless.

Yeah, I think the whole thing was only an 18-hour event, so I don't—

Okay, whatever it is, 18 hours. He's motionless, bro.

I can't sleep.

He's dead. Oh, it's Weekend at Bernie's. They just fired him up with cocaine.

He's back.

No, no, no, no, this is old video. Okay, so this is video before he completely short-circuited, but it's crazy to watch because I can't do what he's doing. What he's doing is like some Zen monk master shit. Where he's like sitting in a position and not moving a muscle for hours and hours at a time, where everybody's like moving around and moving back and forth and left and right. He's not moving. Look, watch this. Look at him.

That's only just a clip of it, but he just sits. Also, the guy next to him is just sitting there with him and doesn't—

Yeah, at least that guy's moving his fucking head.

Barely.

McConnell's not moving at all, dude. It's bizarre. It's bizarre. He's frozen. Look at him.

I feel like the dude beside him is the one that's— look at that, pushing a button to make him vote.

Yeah.

Speaking of the voting, he did make a vote at the end of this. Apparently made the wrong vote. Someone noticed he made the wrong vote.

They fixed his vote.

Yeah, they told his handler and then he fixed his vote. Like, it was like a thumbs up, and then as he's walking away, it was like thumbs down, and then he keeps walking away.

They don't want to let it go, man.

None of them do.

It's crazy.

Who was the last one they weekended? Bernie's, was it?

Dianne Feinstein.

Feinstein.

Yeah, she's in a wheelchair, didn't know where she was.

Bruh.

And they're like, you want to vote yes?

She looked worse than him.

Well, she at least can move around more.

Like towards the end.

Really?

And then they— and then Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Like, I wonder what it is about— because that's why power is so scary. to me because it's like they want it. They can't give it up to the last drop.

Yeah, it's identity. It's your identity. It's who you think you are. You're the senator. You're this distinguished senator from South Carolina or wherever you're from.

Can't you— but you already rich. Ain't you tired? Don't you wanna go play with your grandbabies? No.

And they never feel rich enough. That's the other thing about trying to get rich. You never— you get accustomed to whatever level you're at and you wanna keep leveling up.

I mean, 'cause once you at the point where you're a senator, you can pretty much do whatever you wanna do.

You mean money-wise?

Not if you're clean. Well, I mean, you have a lot of power. You have enough power where you can do most things. I mean, though, you know.

Yeah, but the clean ones don't really have a lot of money.

The clean ones?

The clean ones. The ones who aren't doing the insider trading.

Ain't no clean ones.

There's a few. There's a bunch of people that you can— there's fun— you can find lists of them online where they are not participating in any of that. And then you look at their income, you look at their wealth, they're not worth a lot of money.

Senators?

Senators. They live like a person who makes $170,000 a year, which is a good living. Oh, but that's how they live.

All right, I'm gonna look. I want to see that list. I want to know who it is.

There's plenty.

I'm not gonna—

Tim Burchett, isn't he one of them?

I don't know who's who.

I don't think he's ever been accused of any of that. There's a bunch of these people that are clean, and it's— look, man, it's just— it's such a dirty business.

See, I bet you there's a correlation between the people that are clean and the people that haven't been doing it for that long. Yeah, you know, I think if you stick around, once you start getting them committees— and because that's the real power, once you start being on these committees committees and being a chair and this and that. And you start— because that's when you deal directly with industries and they start bribing you and shit.

And then there's also this thing where you retire and you go work for them.

Yeah, you— so you— and you don't— they ain't letting you get it. They ain't letting no new people get committees.

That's true. Nah, nah, no, no, no, no, no.

So it's like, what, they not letting you— they not letting you near any of the real power unless you play ball?

Exactly.

You know, either you doing this corruption or we got you on tape doing something. You— but you, you ain't Yeah, we are all dirty. So we— yeah, that's why every time, like, regardless of how much they fight in public, Democrats and Republicans, every time it's time to get theyself a raise, they all vote yes. It's never no filibuster, it's never no controversy, right? They all like, yeah, I'll take a little more money, right?

Well, that's also why they haven't stopped this insider trading thing. Yeah, because they're both doing it.

It's why they won't release the Epstein files. It's why they won't tell us who shot Kennedy. Somebody— because only the things that fuck— it's, it's, it's also why they have this like blind support of Israel, you know, because like, and they know why.

They're getting paid.

Yeah, or blackmailed.

Paid or blackmailed or both. Paid, blackmailed, or both. Or there's, there's a lot of those kooky fundamentalist Christians that have an allegiance to Israel because they think Jesus is gonna come back.

Oh, I guess I didn't think about that.

Oh, there's a ton of them. There's a ton of them Mike Huckabee type characters.

Wasn't you telling me something about the Old Testament when I walked in?

We were talking. Jamie was bringing up something about Moses. We're gonna bring that up. Yeah.

Um, it was just like following the story of— I guess it'd be like literally following the story and just sort of like, you know, putting it through a filter about things I know, or we know now. Damn it, I lost it. Hold on a second. But like, yeah, I guess what do you know about that story? Off the gate.

Which part of the story? You were talking about the 10 Commandments?

Well, it's how Moses found— that's Moses and the Burning Bush, Exodus 3. I guess that's how it's like titled. So that's where he finds the 10 Commandments. So he sees a burning bush, or a bush that is burning and not burning up, you know, like not being consumed by the fire. Correct. And then an angel of God speaks to him, tells him to take off his shoes because he's on holy ground. And then depending on which reading of the Bible or translation you're finding, he either finds the tablets or they're like presented to him or something. He then takes the tablets down off of the mountain, sees the people worshiping a golden calf, breaks the tablets. Then they have to go make them again. And this is where I started getting in this place of where I was like researching like language and cuneiform and whatnot. I'm like, how many people back then knew actually how to write, read, and then how, like, the other— like, we've gone on sidetracks with it might be an acacia bush and he might have been, you know, high on DMT or something like that.

Oh, he was probably high.

And so, like, it says he found them. So, like, what did he find?

And I think that's a big part of a lot of these ancient religious stories. And there's a bunch of scholars out of the University of Jerusalem that that they first came up with this theory that the acacia tree, the burning bush, was in fact a psychedelic plant. And this, like what happens when you smoke DMT, you have crazy experiences and visions, you meet entities. And this is probably what— he probably got a giant dose of DMT from a burning bush.

Yeah, I think that that's also— didn't Joseph Smith also find some tablets?

Yeah.

Yeah. I think— see, I'm always fascinated by people like the people that have founded religions and stuff, because it's like, how charismatic do you have to be for people to buy that? For you to like go in the woods and come back and go, hey, I spoke to God and this— he told me this was all the rules. It's not me saying it. It's like, because you— because think about who you would believe that would say that today.

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Mm-hmm.

We are not— we don't immediately trust authority. We're reluctant to believe people. We're very skeptical. You tell me something wacky, I'm like, wait, what happened? Where were you? You found a bush? The bush was on fire? Shut the fuck up.

Especially if you start asking me for money.

Right. But there's a lot of people that they're not confident at all, and they're very easily persuaded. And those people fall in line, like people that fall into cults, like the cult that owned the building that I almost bought, that One World Theater. That— you've ever watched that documentary?

Mm-hmm.

That guy, I mean, he was, he was basically an obvious kook. He was a gay porn star and a hypnotist and developed this cult out of his yoga students. And if you ever taken yoga before, Very— it gets very culty. There's a lot of people that are teaching the yoga that they— look, there's yoga teachers that are very cool and just really cool, peaceful, spiritual people that really enjoy teaching yoga and making people's lives better, for sure.

This is—

But there's also people that get into a position of power, like being the spiritual leader of a yoga class, and then they start abusing that power. That's the story of like Bikram. Like, if you, you know, you ever watch the documentary on that guy that did Bikram yoga? He's fucking everybody. He was a wild dude.

He had Rolls-Royces.

Like, he was living like, like a psychopath. And it's all cult stuff. It's like you have that kind of power over these people.

Was he also fucking people's wives?

I'm sure he was.

Because that feels like a— no, but I mean, it feels like that's a through line.

Oh yeah.

In a lot of cults.

Like Waco.

At some point he's like, I'm supposed to be fucking your wife.

God told me I get to fuck your wife.

Yeah. There's a surprising amount of comics that were raised in cults or escaped cults.

Kurt Metzger.

Yeah. Kurt Metzger, Abby Roberge, um, um, I forget her name. There's a girl at the Mothership.

Mm-hmm.

That they— yeah, it's like I've met— I probably met like maybe 5 or 6 comics that were like, oh yeah, I was in a cult.

Makes sense. Well, Ari was Orthodox Jewish, like heavily, like studying the Torah 12 hours a day, like the whole deal. Lived in Israel in a kibbutz, like he did the whole deal.

Wait a minute, who?

Ari Shaffir.

Oh.

Ari Shaffir was deeply religious. Deeply, deeply religious. And then what changed? He got older. He got into his like early 20s, like, what the— this is fucking nonsense. Like, what the fuck are we doing? And then he became a comic. Like, did a full 180.

Yeah, I mean, that's a motherfucker that's gonna do whatever you want to do.

Yes. Well, especially at What he's been through with, you know, being in that religious environment, like hyper-religious environment, he is just completely allergic to any rules, any, any authority, any people telling people what to do and how to behave and how to think. Fuck you. He's just— he has none of that in him.

Well, this is the truth, man. This was just what I found, is that most of the time the people telling you how you're supposed to live, it's like people that make it their whole personality to tell other people how to live. they usually are living like shit. They doing some shady shit almost every time.

It's definitely that. And then there's another thing that happens with people that don't have kids in particular, and it happens with— I mean, I don't want to generalize, but it seems like it's Republicans too, but it's a lot of liberal women. Liberal women with no children want to turn the world into their children. They want to like scold the world like they're doing the wrong thing. and they're worried about the environment, and they're worried about the future, and they're worried about voting, and they're worried about rights, and they're worried about the immigrants, they're worried about the this, and they're worried about that. They're taking care of the world like it's the child that they don't have.

But those all sound like good things.

Well, it depends on which, which angle you're taking on any of these things. You know, I mean, you use those things as an excuse to be a cunt, then they're not good things.

You know, I just heard a lady talking about this. She called it— I don't want to fuck it up. She called it— fuck, don't worry about it.

That very same thing? No, but people that don't have children?

No, no, no. She was talking more along the lines of like, of what— of like cancel culture and what it's born out of.

Yeah.

Basically like defining yourself. She called it like slave morality or master-slave morality, where she was saying like the ruling class traditionally defines themselves as, like the way they behave, as good and just. Like, you know, things like being beautiful and being successful. And then the slave morality is defining yourself as not those things. Right, like you're, you're saying that like I'm a good person because I'm not those things. And you have to— and then you have to— see, I'm gonna fuck this up. You're gonna have to— and then you have to demonstrate that morality by punishing people.

It's a Nietzsche thing.

Master and slave morality, 2 opposing value systems introduced by the philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche in his 1887 book On the Genealogy of Morality. Master morality is an active, self-affirming value system created by the strong, wealthy, and ruling class Definition of good: masters look at themselves and define what is good based on their own traits, such as strength, power, nobility, beauty, courage, and wealth. Definition of bad: bad is simply a secondary descriptive term for what is common, plain, or low, not evil. Perspective: it's an inward-looking— it's inward-looking and focuses on action and achievement rather than reacting to others. Slave morality is reactive, defensive value system born from resentment— resentment? Why does it say resentment? Is that how you say it?

Deep-seated resentment.

What is it? But it's— what is resentment? Have you ever seen that word? Deep-seated resent— oh, it's deep-seated resentment. It's deep resentment. And powerlessness experienced by the oppressed or the herd. Definition of evil: slaves begin by defining what they fear or cannot attain. seen in their oppressors as evil. For example, power, pride, wealth, and strength. Definition of good: good is created in reaction to evil, defined as the opposite of the master's traits, praising humility, meekness, obedience, empathy, and forgiveness. Well, the interesting thing is cancel culture does not have much forgiveness. No, nor does it have empathy for opposing thoughts.

No, but the woman I saw speaking, she goes into that about how Like, you, you get to the point where— because, because human beings are all those things, right? It's like you, you trying to define yourself as one or the other, you would— you have to reinforce your morality by— basically, let me put it in my own words. Everyone is looking for a reason to be their worst self. Like, you're looking for a reason to, to be evil, to like exercise your, your nastiness. And the way to do that is by defining someone else as bad.

Right.

So then you get to say, you know, I'm— it's like, normally I would never burn down somebody's house, but they voted for such-and-such. Like, normally I would never, you know, yell at someone's kids, but they had this sticker on their car. It's like you start having to define what other people are so that you can espouse your morality. You understand what I'm saying?

Yeah. It's weak people.

We're all looking for— I think it's just human nature.

Yeah, but that's a weakness to not be able to object to look at why you're upset at things is a weakness. It's a psychological weakness.

But we all have weak spots where there's things that you don't— that you are not objective about.

Sure.

Like you have blind spots, you know?

Yes.

Or it's like you hear somebody died and the first thing you want to know is, well, how did they die? Right? Because you're trying to figure out— you're trying to— you're looking for a reason to not care.

No.

Oh yeah.

I don't do that.

What if you— okay, let me tell you something. What if I tell you—

I never look for a reason to not care.

What if I tell you somebody died doing something stupid?

Well, you know, people doing something stupid is stupid. I mean, it's not that I don't care. It's not like I'm looking for a reason to not care.

Well, okay.

But it's like I'm looking for a reason whether or not I should be really sad or really upset.

Right. Or you can go, well, you know, that's what it— like, maybe you're not looking for a reason to not care, but when you get one, you go, oh, thank God. You know? I don't have to, like, go through the emotions 'cause that dude strapped himself to a rock.

Yeah, well, there's always people like that. There's always people that do stupid shit that you don't feel bad for if they die. And interesting enough, it's more men than women.

That don't want to feel bad?

Yeah, I never laugh when women die. Like, but men die— if men die doing something stupid, like a dude runs with the bulls and he gets a horn up his asshole, it's like, okay, bro.

Yeah, I'm trying to think if I've ever—

What are you doing? Why are you doing that?

I'm trying to think if I've ever laughed at a woman dying.

I feel bad when women die.

I don't think so. Yeah, bro, I have so— like, I was telling the homie this yesterday, but like, I got the Captain Save-a-Ho gene from both sides. It's dominant, it's not recessive. I'm such a soft—

like, you're a compassionate person.

Girl tears, just— I'm just like, all right, fine, take it, take whatever you want.

You're a nice person. That's what it is. But it can be manipulated with the wrong ladies.

Yep, facts.

That's all it is. It's just you just got to find a good woman. And if you find just good people in general, and then you won't be— you don't have to worry about being manipulated because they're not trying to manipulate you. But you have to be manipulated a bunch of times to recognize the pattern, and you go, okay.

Because I have definitely watched— I've definitely watched videos of women getting hurt and laughed.

Well, I watched this one Mexican lady lay some bitches out on 6th Street, and I wanted to sign her for the UFC.

Really?

Whoo! This chick had a fucking haymaker, dude. She was wide, and she gets in a brawl with these chicks. The shoes are off immediately, and this girl's throwing bombs like Amanda Nunes right hands. I mean, flatlining chicks. She filmed it. I didn't watch it personally.

I'm never on 6th Street.

No, no, no, no, this bitch was stout. Those are white chicks, they can't fight. As soon as you see this, as soon as you see the leaning back and the punching at the same time, nothing good's happening. This chick was tucking her chin and throwing like this. Boom! She was throwing power shots. She was flatlining chicks.

Oh, this girl?

Um, nope, that's not it. They're doing the same thing. See the leaning back? There's no power in leaning back. She actually punched her in the nose. That's all that is.

She had a good stance as you were saying it.

Yeah, bad, bad posture, terrible form. This lady, at one point in time, someone taught her how to punch, or she's just a natural talent.

Some people, yeah, some people got it.

Some people have natural talent.

Yeah, 'cause see, that's the thing, like, if they deserve it, I'll watch them get punched.

Bro, my friend Tommy, my friend Tommy Jr., have you met him? Tommy?

No.

One of my oldest friends. He's been my friend for 35 years. He had this girl that he was dating for a while, and he was always telling me— she was like a strong girl, she worked out a lot. He's like, dude, she can punch, man. That fucking machine, she can punch. And I go, really? So I'm, I'm skeptical, but I'm open-minded. And I go, how hard do you punch? She goes, she goes, I punch fucking hard. And I go, okay, hit my hand. And she hit my hand. I held my hand up and she fucking cracked my hand to the point where like, oh, that could knock me out. Like, that could knock me out.

I just found it right as you said hit my hand. I fucking hit play on— ah, damn it. I hit play on that one and that was it. Where is it? Uh, it's right here.

Sensitive cunt. Yep, that's her. No shoes, bro. Bro, look at that punch. I'm gonna watch this again. Watch this again. Back it up to the beginning. Oh, it's a— it's an Instagram video. This chick, okay, she's got sandals on. She's not barefoot.

This is earlier in the video, I think. think it starts off with the highlight, you know, and then—

Bro, you'll show— yeah, her shoes do come off, right? This chick can fucking crack, dude.

Yeah, shout out to the Texas Street Fights guy.

Try to watch it again. All right, here we go. Ready? Watch this. Boom! See the hips? See the hips and the shoulder?

From now on, every time I come on the podcast, this is all I want to do.

Bro, that girl can fight. That girl—

we're gonna throw that chick down.

She's stout too. Look at the ground and pound. Vicious. I mean, sign her up.

That first punch was incredible. And then the hip toss.

A hammer, dude. She threw a hammer. All, all body was into that. She pushed off her feet, everything. That was excellent. If I was her coach, I'd be like, fuck yeah, that was great. Damn.

See, you gotta be— if you got— if you hit motherfuckers like that, you gotta be careful, man. You could kill somebody.

Oh, 100%, you know, 100%.

She's not even looking.

Yeah, that girl's looking away too.

This bitch, she doesn't even know the fight started, bro.

One more time, give me one more time.

Boom! Oh my God, flatline. Yo, that's like— she— no, she never had a concussion. You watched, you saw her foot was moving.

Not only that, her head bounced off the ground. That's the scary part.

You fuck around, man.

The scary part is when the head bounces off the ground. That's when people die.

I'm so glad I'm at the age now where I ain't trying to fight no motherfucker body.

Yeah, fuck that.

Fuck. But you know when you, when you young and you, when you're in your 20s and you're like, fucking what's up then? Yeah, that shit could go so many— that shit could go wrong so many ways.

I never got in fights. I got in a couple fights in high school. That's it. And before that, I got in a couple fights. Very, very few amount of street fights in my career.

Yeah.

Yeah. All organized. I've had a lot of organized fights, a lot of agreed-to fights. I've had a lot of like like matches where I knew I was preparing for and I had fights.

It's been a long time. The last time I got into a serious fight, man, it was when I was still, uh, I was still, I was a doorman at an Irish pub.

Irish pubs are famous for fights.

Yeah, and I remember this dude had, um, he, he came with, uh, he forgot his ID. Him and his girl came and she had her ID and he didn't have his. And, and then he went back to get his ID. His girl started drinking. He was gone for like an hour. And then, and she kept coming out talking my fucking head off, coming out talking my fucking head off. Because that's how you can tell when people drunk, because like they'll just, they'll tell you the same story they told you 10 minutes ago.

Yeah.

And, and the last time she came out to talk to me, she, she left her phone on my— I had like a little table beside me. And then she came back out to smoke again, and, and, and the boyfriend came up behind her and like picked her up, you know, romantic, whatever. And, and I went to go, hey, you left your phone, and I turned to point at the phone, and he just clocked me. And my head bounced against the, like, you know, the frame of the door. And, and we get right to it, you know. I'm whooping this boy's ass real bad, and the cops come out of nowhere. This is in, this is in San Diego. This is a I think it's Adams Avenue, but it's, it's where like, it's like, it's basically like 6th Street.

Oh, nice.

Like all the bars.

Yeah, yeah.

And, and the cops just come out of nowhere, and they were all on my side. They put us both in handcuffs, and then they was like, what happened? And the bartender was like, he works here, and fuck that guy. And they was like, what do you want to do? I was like, let the motherfucker go. Anyway, that guy, later on I found out that guy, he ended up beating the shit out of the girl getting arrested, you know. But he just hit me for no reason. And what was so funny is when I start whooping his ass, he completely— he was like a psycho. He completely was like, why are you doing this? What's happening? Like, and he just punched the shit out of me for no reason at all. Never said 2 words to this dude except, do you have your ID? He just punched the fuck out of me. Like, he went straight from like showing his girl all this affection and then punching me in the face.

He's probably on drugs.

He's probably on drugs or some kind of— he probably got some kind of—

Mental health issue.

What do you call it, emotional dysregulation? Mm-hmm. Or something like that.

Mood swings. Definitely not a healthy person.

Because I don't think it was like— it wasn't like he didn't— he wasn't— he wasn't acting confused. He was actually confused as to why I was whooping his ass. You understand what I'm saying?

It wasn't acting.

It was— it wasn't because it doesn't give me that vibe of like where he was trying to like get people, come help, right? It wasn't like that. He was genuinely like, what? Why are you doing this, man? What's going on? Like, he seriously didn't understand.

Did you have glasses on at the time?

No, I was— I should have. I was supposed to, but I just couldn't.

That's a real problem, isn't it? You get punched with glasses on?

That's never happened to me.

Really?

No, I just recently started caring about my vision.

Dude, I knew a lot of guys who would fight in the UFC with contacts on.

Oh, that's insane.

Yeah.

I know a dude who got staph infection on his eyeball because he picked up his contact off the mat and put it back in his eye.

That's— that is— see, that's what I mean. See, I don't care about that guy. I don't care, right? Because why would you—

He was a kid.

That was— oh, as a child.

No, but, you know, 18, 19-year-old kid. He didn't know any better.

Oh, okay. Yeah.

Ugh! I think he got really fucked up from it too. I don't know if he lost his eye, but it was like a serious problem. And I've heard of that more than once.

It's kind of scary. See, that's the thing. If it's harmless and you did some stupid shit, it's definitely funny, right? If it's harmful and you were doing some stupid shit, right, it's 50/50. If it's harmful and you were doing some stupid shit trying to harm somebody else, it's funny every single time. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

You go to throw a punch and you slip and fall down a flight of stairs and break your leg.

Yeah, that's why my— that's why my first thing when you tell me somebody died, I'm like, how did they die? You don't get to say it's private or respect the family. If you're not gonna tell me how they died, then keep it to yourself, because I need to know how to feel.

Well, it's that story I tell on stage about the missionary who delivered the Bible to the uncontacted tribe and they murdered him. Like, nobody feels bad for that guy.

No, no, because that— I think deep down we are mind-your-business people. It's like, hey, you should have been minding your business. You know, it's like those people, they— because it takes work to stay uncontacted.

Sort of.

They're stuck. Those people are stuck. North Sentinel people are stuck. What's really crazy, if you know the story behind them, you understand why they're so hostile to outsiders.

Why?

Because there was a guy named Commander Maurice Vidal Portman, and he was this explorer/pervert who was traveling around like an English gentleman who was traveling around to these islands, and he would do weird shit. Like, he would dress them up weird and take photos of them and make like these, these descriptions of them. He like wrote about this one guy, had testicles the size of a sparrow's egg. Like, he's describing this guy's testicles. So he's doing some freak shit to these people. They also kidnapped—

How big is a sparrow's egg? Why is that the—

I guess they're little. He just was comparing.

Okay.

Um, the guy had little testicles, probably malnourished. He's on a— he's stuck on a fucking island. Like, these people were direct descendants of, you know, this place, North Sentinel Island, and this island chain that's out there. They're completely uncontacted. And this North Sentinel Island only has 39 people, roughly estimated, living on it. And they're stuck. And they have been visited in the past by people, but it went horribly wrong. And one of them, they kidnapped I think they kidnapped 2 children and possibly their— a grandparent as well, and then they gave them something like the flu or some sort of a disease and the people died. They had no immunity to these outside diseases, just like the Native Americans didn't. You know, when the Europeans showed up, you know, this is the thing that killed literally 90% of Native Americans died from like smallpox.

Mm.

Because it just spread like wildfire.

I know.

They had no immunity. Oh, it's bad. The— like, when people talk about the genocide of North America, of Native Americans, yes, absolutely, they definitely murdered a lot of the Native American tribes. However, the vast majority of them died from disease. Like, let's like throw that into our AI-sponsored perplexity. What percentage of Native Americans died from disease because of the European settlers? I think it's really high.

Are these the people you were talking about yesterday that they don't have a—

No, no, no, no, that was different. That's the guy from the Amazon who went to live with these people. How do you say their name again? Pirahã? The Pirahã people. Fascinating. Wow, that was one of the most interesting podcasts I've had in a long time. The guy was really cool. Roughly 50 to 90% of indigenous people in many affected regions died in epidemics after European contact. Some older continent-wide estimates put disease-related losses as high as about 90 to 95%. Fuck, dude.

Goddamn.

Fuck.

Just fucking imagine that. I mean, imagine you've got no medication, and then on top of that you have no immunity to these dirty Europeans who are coming over and fucking everybody.

And smallpox, measles, influenza, typhoid, and others.

Everything.

Everything. The fucking full monty. Crazy.

Damn, I guess— damn, I didn't know that's what happened at that scale.

Well, especially when you're dealing with Europeans that are living in these squalor-like conditions. So Native Americans lived in these nomadic— especially like the Comanche— nomadic tribal existence where they were— they had tents and horses and they were traveling around and going to different places. They didn't live in their own shit. So the Europeans were living in these fucking places where they take a pot of shit and throw it out the window. Their streets were filled with horseshit. They had shit everywhere.

And they were wrong about why people were getting sick. You know, it's like they didn't realize like, oh, the shit is in the drinking water.

Yeah, it's everywhere.

Yeah, because they— back then, you know, there was a time where like they believed in like vapors and you know what I'm talking I'm talking about like that time where everything was spirits and alignment, and they just— they were just completely wrong about why people were getting sick downriver. They did— no one— it took a long time for people to connect that it was like, oh, because we're shitting up here, and then we're pumping our drinking water.

Well, the first doctor to realize that you should wash your fucking hands before you operate on people or give birth or help someone give birth Those— no one thought that was necessary. They didn't realize, like, you have disease, you have germs in your fucking hands. He was ridiculed, the first doctor that said that. I think we should wash our hands. Like, fuck out of here.

Who is that guy? Why don't we celebrate that dude?

I know, we should. I think probably the medical establishment probably does.

I mean, he might— he may have saved more lives than anyone.

Right.

Yeah. I mean, you got to think, before they had microscopes, They were just guessing.

Well, at least when did— when did it start being a thing to wash your hands?

Well, for physicians, here's the guy: Ignaz Semmelweis.

Oh, that's why we don't celebrate him. Your name's hard to say.

Too rough.

You can't have two— you can't have two hard names.

Hungarian medical doctor and scientist of German descent who was an early pioneer of antiseptic procedures, known as the Savior of Mothers. Postpartum infection, also known as As purpura— purpura— purpural fever or childbed fever was common in the 19th century and often fatal. Semmelweis demonstrated that the incidence of infection could be drastically reduced by requiring healthcare workers in obstetrical clinics to disinfect their hands. In 1847, he proposed handwashing with chlorinated lime solutions at Vienna General Hospital's obstetrical clinic where doctors' wards had thrice the mortality of midwives' wards.

Wow. I think it's obstetrical.

Obstetrical.

But I don't feel like we have to say it again.

Obstetrical. It's funny how you can live to 59 years old and never have said a word.

Oh.

And then it just shows up.

How many times did you say thrice? Thrice.

I'm gonna say it all the time now. I mean, I have thrice done this.

I only say— I only see it written. I never hear anybody say that. Thrice?

Yeah.

No.

Who says thrice?

If you say thrice in a regular conversation—

Yeah, you're flexing.

You're something.

Or if you say tertiary. Tertiary conditions.

No, that's one of my favorite words. Tertiary. 'Cause you— 'cause it's the only word I know of that means that.

Right.

So sometimes it's a handy one.

Right.

Yeah, because before I learned that word, I would just be like, you know, secondary but more. And then when I heard tertiary, I was like, that's it!

They beat him up and killed him for fucking telling everybody to wash his hands.

What?

Yeah, they threw him in a mental institution where he got beat up and died 2 weeks later.

Oh my God. Despite his research, Semmelweis's observations conflicted with the establishment scientific views of the time— the established scientific views of the time— and his ideas were rejected by the medical community. He could not offer a theoretical explanation for his findings of reduced mortality due to handwashing. Additionally, some doctors were offended by the suggestion that they should wash their hands and mocked him for it. In 1865, the increasingly outspoken Semmelweis purportedly suffered a nervous breakdown, was committed to an asylum by his colleagues. In the asylum, he was beaten by the guards. He died 14 days later from a gangrenous wound on his right hand that may have been caused by the beating. Man.

So you could— I guess you could say he was the Dr. Fauci of his time.

The opposite. He was— and then he got gangrene from an infection, which is even crazier. He died from a fucking infection from his beating. Goddamn.

And then Louis Pasteur is the guy. I've heard that name.

Yeah, I've heard of Louis Pasteur. He confirmed the germ theory, giving Semmelweis's observations a scientific explanation. And then Joseph Lister— is that from Listerine? Acting on Pasteur's research, pioneered antiseptic surgical methods with great success. Click on Joseph Lister. Is he responsible for Listerine? Or maybe like it's because his name was like so ubiquitous when they were talking about— was his name like a name that was synonymous with antiseptics? Who invented Listerine? Why don't you just Google that?

Well, because I would imagine— I didn't know I was walking into one of the longest Wikipedias I've ever seen.

I thought it was just gonna be like on the third page.

Look at all this shit on Joseph Lister.

Yeah, he's done a bunch of stuff.

Damn.

Goddamn.

He was getting work done. That's a guy that was not lazy.

A third of the way down.

Damn, that dude did a lot of work. Thank God for those people, right? Thank God for those people that are out there investigating germs and diseases. And Listerine— Listerine is named after Joseph Lister. That's it.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Yeah, of course, because people probably at the time, back then when Listerine was invented, you know, 1879. Yeah, there you go.

And they're not careful. Now it's like a— it's kind of like ubiquitous now, right?

Yeah, well, the other thing about like mouthwash, I hear that mouthwash is actually not good for Yeah. I was reading this thing— God, it was quite a while ago. They were talking about athletics. They were talking about like athletic performance and, and, and gains in terms of like the— what you— when you're training, like how well you recover and how good you get, how strong you get afterwards. that it's diminished by mouthwash.

What?

Yeah, yeah, see if you can find that. Which makes sense, right? Your gut bacteria and all the fucking— like, like, for instance, if you take antibiotics— you've ever had to take antibiotics? If you take antibiotics and try to work out, holy shit, bro, you feel so tired. You feel so exhausted.

Are there fighters that stink on purpose, like, as part of their strategy?

Oh yeah, definitely.

Really? Is that allowed?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jiu-jitsu guys used to do it all the time. They used to not wash their gi at all. It would smell like ammonia.

Are you allowed to do that?

I don't know. We'll find out. Antibacterial mouthwash is plausibly linked to exercise physiology but has not been proven to meaningfully worsen race time, strength, or overall athletic performance in healthy people. The main concern is that it can suppress oral bacteria involved in producing nitric oxide, a molecule important for blood vessel dilation and oxygen delivery. Okay, there it is.

Thanks, Perplexity.

Thank you, Perplexity. That's like if you take Viagra, wouldn't it? And then beetroot. Beets are really good for converting to nitric oxide in your body.

Why?

It's— I don't know. There's something about beets in general. Well, it says right here, dietary nitrite found in foods such as leafy greens and beetroot can be converted by certain mouth bacteria into nitrite, which the body could then use to make nitric oxide. Nitric oxide helps regulate blood flow, blood pressure, and potentially muscle oxygenation during and after exercise. I know a lot of dudes that will drink beetroot shots before they work out.

Really?

Yeah, yeah, that beetroot apparently gives you a little bit of extra juice.

So that's saying if, if you depend on, on those type of foods, then you're killing the bacteria in your mouth that helps convert them to something usable.

Yes, it can— kills your body's ability to convert. It'll diminish your performance maybe somewhat, but you know, people are always looking for every possible edge. So if it turns out that like you use some mouthwash and it'll just take a little bit out of your endurance and a little bit out of your like race time, or a little bit out of your ability to go into the 3rd, 4th, and 5th round, yeah, I mean, it's gonna— if it does mess with your body's nitric oxide, it's gigantic.

And it'd be more motivation because it's like, imagine if you do all of that and then don't win, you know, then— because it's okay to be a funky breath champion, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, but you can brush your teeth. You don't— just don't use mouthwash.

Oh yeah.

There's nothing wrong with brushing your teeth.

Right, right. That's not gonna kill all of the bad breath germs.

No, but there's a lot of people that also believe that one of the reasons why people get so many skin infections is because we wash so much. And that we've managed to nuke all of the external flora, the skin flora that we have that usually used to protect people from things?

Mm-hmm. No, yeah, I could believe that.

Yeah, that makes sense.

I could believe that for sure.

Yeah, well, I mean, why do we have to wash all the time if other than the fact that you don't want to smell? But take that away, and what would be like the natural reason why you would be created in a way that you must wash yourself all the time or you can get sick? That's crazy. That doesn't even make sense. No animals are like that. Like, my dog goes a week without washing and he's fine.

He—

I take him to the groomers once a week. Unless he gets in the pool or goes in the lake, he's not— he's not washing. They're fine.

But I bet you— I bet you it's kind of like— I bet you humans are kind of like, like, you know how— well, maybe it was you that told me, like, if you— if you have a pig and it gets out Yeah, and you like say you put a tracker on him, when you find him, he's gonna be a different animal. Yeah, you know, and I think, I think maybe like if you was to just release a human into the wild, they would— you would start not needing to walk, you know what I mean? Oh yeah, like your body would change in a way that— this is my theory.

I bet that makes sense in terms of your skin.

Yeah, cuz when you hear stories from the ancient world and stuff, you never really— it's not a lot of Like an epidemic of funky motherfuckers.

Wasn't there a dude who was like the world's dirtiest man and they found this guy and then he died? No, that was a different guy. The dude was like the— it was like, there's a famous photo of this guy. He's like caked in dirt and I think they washed him off and he died shortly afterwards. Yeah, there's the dude. Oh, but Look at him, he's smoking 4 cigarettes. World's dirtiest man in Iran, aged 94 years old.

The meme says that, I don't know if it's accurate.

Yeah, didn't wash for 60 years, died shortly after washing for the first time. Find out if that's true though.

But what—

Put that into Perplexity.

What made him wash?

Well, he did die, but it's a matter of timing, you know.

Right, but I mean, I'd like to know Even if it's just correlation that does not necessarily equal causation, I would like to know if he died shortly afterwards. He died a few months after bathing for the first time in 60 years, having been persuaded by the inhabitants of the village to do so. There you go.

See also— wait a minute— see also Dirty Dick.

No, we're gonna leave that alone. Come on.

Really?

You don't know what that's all about.

A London merchant who refused to wash after his fiancée died on their wedding day. Oh boy.

Nathaniel Bentley, commonly known as Dirty Dick, was an English merchant who was known for his filthy and unwashed appearance.

He came from a moneyed background and received a good education. As a young man, he spoke several languages and dressed in a dandified manner. And after his fiancée died on their wedding day, he just said fuck it. He gave up on life.

Why does it say you're on Portal right there?

Probably because it's propaganda. They're trying to get us.

Did you know that we renamed Lake Ontario today?

Yes, to Lake America. Lake Ontario is no longer Lake Ontario, it's Lake America.

And we might be doing the—

why do we do that?

Might be doing Atlantic and Pacific.

Could be.

Yes, we're gonna name them—

I don't know what the ocean—

but Lake Ontario has been Lake Ontario forever. Isn't it connected to Ontario?

Yeah, it said it has something to do with Trump.

Yeah, and what about—

But it's in America or is it in Canada? Parts in Ontario, correct?

Oh, it's the Great Lakes. I mean, it touches both.

Yeah, both. All the lakes touch both.

Okay, but what percentage of the land is on Canada versus America?

I think it's literally— I mean, I could look it up. Yeah, let's look it up. But it's, I think, on the map right now.

Let's see whose side we're on.

No, but also—

I think it's 50/50.

That's cool.

But also, President Trump, you gotta stop fucking with the acronyms, man. Well, because I learned the Great Lakes, but I've learned HOMES. That's how you know, that's how you can name all the lakes, right? How they gonna teach the kids now?

HOMES?

Yeah, Lake Huron, Lake Ontario, Lake Michigan, um, what's next? Lake Erie and Lake Superior.

Oh, the acronym.

Okay.

Okay, I didn't learn that.

No?

I don't think so. If I did, I forgot it. The crazy thing is those are all just melted glaciers.

Really?

Yep.

Isn't that nuts?

Do they, do they connect to the ocean?

No.

Do they?

Yes.

All of them?

Well, through the St. Lawrence, the lake.

The ones inside, like Michigan, like that one connects to the ocean?

They're all connected to each other.

Oh wow.

They're connected to the— I think that's St. Lawrence Expressway, whatever the hell it's called. Oh, maybe this one's not. I think Lake Ontario is connected.

The one in Illinois— what's the one in Illinois?

I just know that because that's how Ohio got used for shipping.

Well, actually, even the one in Illinois, it makes sense that it would be connected to the ocean because that's— they find sharks up there. You know, they found sharks in Illinois. You know how crazy this is? Bull sharks can— they can live in freshwater. So they swam all the way from the fucking ocean all the way up to Illinois in freshwater.

And then Lake Ontario serves as the outlet to the Atlantic via the St. Lawrence River.

Hmm, but how do they— how do they—

So they're— and they're all connected. So all of them are connected somehow to the ocean. God, I thought they were just in the middle. I thought like there's no way in the middle, but it makes sense.

But what's the purpose of changing the name?

Oh, could distract you from the fact that we're in a war that we can't win in Iran. Doesn't make any sense. Like, who cares if it's Lake Ontario? Well, it's a good name. We've had that name forever.

Yeah, it's weird. It's like these politicians now, they love, they love to solve a problem. Like, they love to like make up a problem for themselves to solve so you feel like they're doing stuff.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, it's like, cuz I don't, I don't understand what we get out of that. It was that like, fuck Canada. Is that what that is?

You know, it's really wild.

Like these lakes, right? They at one point in time— so at one point in time, most of North America was covered in like a mile-plus-high sheet of ice. And then at the end of the Ice Age, all that shit melts, probably with the Younger Dryas impact. It's probably very rapid. Oh, that video, we got to show that, the Nepal thing.

Mm-hmm.

And then after that, They melt and becomes a lake. How do all the fish get in there? Are they getting in there from the ocean? And why are there freshwater fish in there? How long does that take? Because if this whole thing where North America was under ice as recently as 11,000 years ago, how the fuck are they freshwater fish? How are the freshwater fish getting in there? Like, where are they coming from?

Probably the ocean.

Right, but freshwater fish in the ocean? Did they evolve, become freshwater over time? How much time does that take? You know what I'm saying? Because if it's only 11,000 years—

Well, how do those sharks do it? You said those sharks—

Well, that's different. Those sharks can exist in freshwater. So the bull sharks in particular—

The Great Lakes are connected to other sources of water as well. Yeah, like other rivers and other lakes, right?

But wasn't all that frozen as well at one point in time? If the entire North American continent was like 3/4 of it was covered in like a mile-plus high sheet of ice, Real recently.

It couldn't have been that recently.

Oh yeah, it was that recently. It was like, I think, as recently as 11,000 or 12,000 years ago.

Oh, right.

It would have taken 9,000 years. That might not have, you know, that's not quick.

It says fish were in the Great Lakes soon after the last ice age, roughly 10,000 to 14,000 years ago.

Yeah.

And then they started, you know, fishing as long as—

Yeah, yeah, I guess you're right, Jamie. Like, that's not a little bit of years.

No, it's definitely a lot of years, but it's interesting that they're freshwater fish.

Right?

So if the water is connected from the ocean—

Mm, I see what you're saying. That's not enough time for something to evolve from all those different things.

And turn into freshwater. So it couldn't be from the ocean. It could— it must be that either they're these kind of fish that transition like salmon do. You know, salmon go from freshwater to saltwater and they go back and forth. So they spawn in the rivers and then they go back out to the ocean.

Is it— so maybe it's that all freshwater fish can—

I don't think they can.

Was it— I have another question. Was it frozen all the way down? Because, uh, can't you ice fish?

Oh yeah, ice fish a mile deep?

I don't know.

No, I think—

does it—

I think it was solid ice covering ground. I mean, I think it's like going fishing in Antarctica. I mean, I think— I think it's just a big giant ice cap. Yo, I just finished fishing during the Ice Age.

I just read something about the Black Sea. Have you heard about the Black Sea? Like, if you go far enough, like once you get down to a certain point in the Black Sea, like 100 or 200?

Yes, people were fishing in North America during the final part of the Ice Age, though the clearest early evidence— okay, there, this is, um, that's different. What does it say? Go up a little bit. Archaeologists found direct evidence that people in central Alaska caught freshwater fish about 13,000 years The identified fish include burbot first, followed by northern pike and whitefish. The remains came from human settlement content— context rather than natural deposits.

Will Perplexity give you porn?

Never tried.

What do you want? You're a dirty man.

You're a goddamn liar.

What do you want? It's not hard to find porn. I don't need Perplexity's help.

Don't say that, Jamie! How long is it gonna be before they can create it?

Well, the thing is, what people—

Sections on— I don't know. I mean, what?

What is like the best— what's the— listen to him. He's like, I don't know what we're talking about.

I forgot.

I forgot.

I know nothing. I've never seen Red Band's phone.

What is the best large language model for creating porn? Probably Claude.

As far as Duncan would say, it's like some Chinese model because all the guardrails are off.

The Chinese ones, they let the gates wide open. Yeah, they're encouraging innovation. That's why they're gonna win.

I mean, they already winning.

They're winning with drones, that's for sure. Their drones are so much more advanced than ours.

Yeah, they already winning. Because I forget, I don't know if it was a guy you had on here before that, but he was talking about how like the big, the big difference over there is like even though they they, they have capitalism. It's not a capitalist system because the capital has no power over the government, right? Like, a rich person in China can't— they can't get a law passed.

No. And if you talk any shit, they'll disappear you.

Yeah, and they'll take your money.

Yeah.

So it was— it's so that they— it was only once we started shipping our jobs over there, our manufacturing jobs, it was only a matter of time. It's not gonna happen in my lifetime. time, you know what I mean?

But like, out of time for what?

Before they, before they beat us economically. Like, you're probably— your great-grandkids gonna be learning Mandarin, you know?

You really believe that?

Mm-hmm.

Interesting.

Have you ever heard people say that the estimates of population there are overestimated? By a lot.

By a lot. Oh, like, you're like, it's not really 2 billion people over there?

I don't know how many they really say. I've tried to look, like, Not a lot more than—

It's hard to know because they're not gonna tell you the truth, and they're not gonna tell you they lied, right? And it's also they had that weird one-child policy, which really fucked them up.

It set them back a lot.

A lot, because then they had all these boys and no girls for the boys. Like, it's the dumbest idea of all time. You have a whole nation where you had 60% boys can't get laid. Or whatever the fuck it is.

I mean, it's tough when you— like, when you do— when you— like, when Pol Pot, how many people did he kill? He killed mad people, and he was like, it's still too many people to feed.

Jesus Christ. That's what's scary, when the resources are low and the government solution— You talking about Mao?

I mean Mao Zedong.

Yeah.

Yeah. That's spooky.

It's spooky though. Too many people, gotta starve them, gotta kill them.

I don't know if that's the reason he gave, that it was too many people.

He also killed quite a few, or is responsible for—

Yeah, Pol Pot.

Yeah, but that was in China though.

Yeah, roughly responsible for the deaths of 1.5 to 2 million people in Cambodia, and he did it over 4 years.

Oh, what was his— what was his reasoning?

So many people.

Oh.

Mass executions and political persecution, forced removal of city residents into rural labor camps, starvation, disease, overwork, torture, and lack of medical care, targeting of perceived political opponents, educated people— educated people, that's crazy— ethnic Vietnamese. I don't know what that word is. Cham, Cham Muslims, Chinese Cambodians, religious groups, and others. Fuck the Khmer Rouge.

See, I feel like a lot of these people, they dictator wrong. If I'm gonna start a slave camp, I'm gonna keep the slaves healthy. They doing all the work.

Well, you know who arguably did it right?

Who?

Muammar Gaddafi.

Muammar Gaddafi?

Yeah, Libya.

He had labor camps?

No, but as a dictator, he arguably did it right. Like, he was a dictator of Libya, but everybody had a home, everybody had an education. If you had a particular skill and you needed to be educated overseas, he would send you overseas and pay for Oh yeah, but then he started trying to convince people to move away from the dollar. Exactly.

We shoved a knife up his ass. Literally.

Yep.

Literally stabbed in the ass. Yeah.

Oh yeah, I've seen the video.

Yeah, so it's like the look on his face when those rebels capture him.

You know who probably paid for that?

Us.

USAID. Oh, oh damn, that kind of shit. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh yeah, cuz I think he, I think he felt betrayed somehow.

Yeah.

Yeah, well, he was. Yeah, he was.

He got betrayed by his own people.

Yeah, I mean, they convinced him to do it. All you have to do is like fund the rebels. You fund the rebels, you overthrow the dictator. That's what they do. It's literally what— I mean, you got— I'll send you some Mike Benzi stuff. It'll freak you out. It'll freak you out because the depth of it and how long it's been going on, and that literally it's for stuff that's too dirty for the CIA. Mm-hmm.

USA. I could use a little bit of that. Yeah, yeah. Because I, I, because, and I don't know if that's exactly true of what he was doing, but I think that is what he was doing. He was trying to move away from the US dollar.

Oh yeah, 100%.

Yeah, yeah. And, and here's the thing, it's easy to be like, well, we shouldn't be murdering people for that, but, but it's like, if that If the world— if the dollar stops being the world's currency, we're in serious trouble.

Yeah, he was also trying to establish the United States of Africa. He was trying to unite Africa.

They ain't never letting that happen.

Exactly. He was trying to do a lot of shit. Um, before I forget, that video from Nepal. The video— have you seen this?

I don't even know.

Oh my god. Oh my god, dude. They had a dam burst, so there was a mudslide I'm not exactly sure.

Was that real? I did see that.

Oh, it's real. Avalanche. I think an avalanche started it. Watch this, dude. This is fucking crazy. Watch it from the beginning, please. Go from the very beginning. Watch how quick this hits. So these people are hanging out, they're running away, they're running, trying to get out of there, but look how fast this comes on, man.

Oh yeah, you're not gonna make it.

But it's the speed of which it overcomes everything is so crazy. And the, the finality of it. Look how it's blowing through that building. I mean, everything's gone.

You said there's a better angle?

Yeah, there's, there's multiple angles. But like, look how it does— it's going through the trees. Like, you're not getting away from this. This is crazy. This is the one. This one's fucking terrifying.

Watch up in the top here.

And these people are moving a pretty high speed too, right?

So they already know. They can feel it.

Oh yeah, well, there's probably sirens going off and shit. But watch the fucking speed that this comes through.

Man, no.

Oh.

Everything's wiped out.

So what—

Everything's wiped out.

What— is this an avalanche? Yeah.

Yeah, it started as an avalanche and the dam broke. It's, it's a series of events.

Oh, the avalanche caused the dam to break, which caused the—

uh-huh.

Oh, wow.

Of course, then an earthquake caused it, but it seems like this caused the earthquake readings. You know, there was so much movement, it caused like a 5.2 reading on the scale.

Bro, it's crazy when you watch the speed in which it overtakes buildings, man. It's fucking horrifying. 'Cause you realize there's nothing you could do about it.

Oh no, I know these people. Are these people about to get—

400 people are missing.

This is after the thing had happened.

After the fact, the people that survived. And what Jamie brought up earlier— Jamie, what you were talking about earlier was the stuff with Randall Carlson said about the melting of the ice caps. So the thing about, you know, the Great Lakes and how North America was covered in over a mile of ice. Randall Carlson has a very compelling theory that coincides with data that we know about when we pass through comet storms, and he thinks we were hit. And he thinks we were hit all over the world. And there's real evidence, like physical evidence in terms of core samples. When they do core samples and they get down to like 11,800 years, they find a lot of— a lot of like material that exists. exists that's very common in space, but very rare on Earth. And also microdiamonds. These microdiamonds that appear from impacts. It's called tritonite. And I think that's the way you pronounce it. But trit— the, the, they first discovered this stuff during the Trinity explosion, because the nuclear bomb created this microglass. This, uh, this nuclear glass that's on the ground.

Hmm.

Because just the sheer force of it. But it also happens during comet impacts. So, when we get hit, it creates this glass and iridium, which is like really common in space, but really rare on Earth. There's like a layer of it, and you get down to like 11,800 years. And it's all over the world. All over the world was hit by this stuff, and particularly North America. And he thinks it's responsible for the Great Flood, the Great Flood that's in the Bible. He thinks it's responsible for all the flooding that you see in North America. like this, the Grand Canyon and all this crazy shit that looks like, what the fuck happened here? Like, what giant boulders that were moved like thousands of miles? Like, what the fuck is this? And he thinks it was just an insane amount of water instantaneously running over the land. So this, these mile-plus-high sheets of ice, imagine comets slamming into the ice. It melts instantly. And you have fucking billions and trillions of gallons of water and debris just like that. crushing the land. And then when it settles down, you got the Great Lakes.

Oh, so this is only— this is not that long ago.

No, not that long ago. The Great Lakes are like 11,000 years old or 12,000 years old or whatever it is. They were frozen solid.

But is there other— is there— so you're saying it's not— there's not one big comet impact?

There's multiple impacts, not just here but all over the world. And on top of that, it probably happened again somewhere around 10,000 years ago. Like, it's— it's— there's a time where we pass through it, and I think it's June and September if I remember correctly, but I might be off. But, you know, this is when— do you know what the Tunguska event is?

No.

Okay, so in— I want to say the 1920s, there was a comet that exploded before it impacted over this area of Alaska, or of Was it Alaska? No, Siberia. Over this area of Siberia. And this area was fucking flattened, and the photos are crazy. It looks like a nuclear bomb went off because it didn't hit, it didn't like impact the ground, it detonated above the surface just from the sheer speed of it coming in and the mass of it all. It hits our atmosphere and explodes, but it just flattened trees everywhere, all over. And they had no idea what caused it. That's what it looks like today. Today it's still this like flattened area. Isn't that nuts? So that happened during the exact time where we pass through this comet storm regularly. So every— when is— when do we pass through that comet storm? Is it June?

So yeah, we just did.

We just did. So we pass through it and most of the time it's fine, but every now and then it's not fine. And when it's not fine, boom.

So you think that years ago there was just more—

Yeah, June. So it's, I believe it's June and either September or June and November. So that one's June. It's the Leonid, isn't it? The Leonid? Oh, the Taurid. Taurid meteor shower. When does the Taurid Taurid— when do we pass through the Taurid meteor, whatever? October? Okay. November.

September to November.

Yeah. September to November, peaking around October 10th, 2026. So it's a regular thing in our solar system that we pass through.

So you think it was— you think there were just more meteors back then? It was just more—

No, I think they're still out there. It's just sometimes they hit, sometimes they don't. And it takes a long time before one does hit. hit or something hits that. But that's why you're seeing meteor showers. When you see those lights in the sky, all the shooting stars, those are meteors. And if you go through a bad spot and we get hit, that's a civilization reset.

Yeah, there's a bunch. I mean, they get so— they get close all the time. They're just not that big.

Yeah, we just get lucky.

Most of them, they just mostly burn up.

Most of them burn up on reentry or entering into our atmosphere. But when they do, it's so bright, man. It's so crazy.

A few have hit houses or something recently. Didn't something happen?

Oh yeah, someone went through— went through someone's house. A meteorite. Scary fucking shit, dude, because there's not a whole lot they can do about it. And I think that's probably what the flood myth was all about.

Insurance won't cover it.

Everyone's dead, it doesn't matter.

They say it's an act of God. No, but say you're not home and a meteor crushed your house, they'll say Is that what they say?

You can't get meteor insurance?

Nope.

Imagine how much you have to pay for meteor insurance and you never use it.

You'd have to specifically, like, you know, like if you got to specifically get that kind— like if you live in California, you have to get fire insurance. You can't— your regular insurance gonna be like, nah.

Well, hey, hold on. Some— it actually says most are falling objects peril, not act of God.

Oh, so maybe there's a Like a separate, a separate kind of fun, a falling—

Because if I was an insurance company, I would 100% offer meteor coverage, because who the fuck's gonna use it? You get all these people paying, you got one guy every 30 years that needs meteor coverage, you'd make a windfall.

Yeah, yeah. Or they could just convince— and they could easily convince people that it's more common.

Oh yeah, you could show them the meteor showers. Falling object insurance, like how often You do not want this to happen to your house and not have coverage.

What about, what about lightning? Your house gets struck by lightning.

That's, that's gotta be act of God.

Yeah, how could you prevent that?

I mean, because we're about— and then we just, we got it, we got a super El Niño starting up, right? And I'm not sure exactly what that means. It doesn't sound good.

When is that coming?

Like this next— just, they, they're predicting it might happen this year.

You know what's weird about Texas? We get the sand from Africa. We get sands from the Sahara in the wind. Yeah. Oh, you ever seen that? It's crazy.

How do they know that?

They know. They know where it came from.

Mm-hmm.

You've never seen that?

Nah.

It's like a regular thing in Texas.

It blows in— how? It blows over the ocean from Africa?

Uh-huh. You can see it in the sky. Look at this. Isn't that nuts? Saharan dust makes a comeback later this week, expected to arrive Wednesday Well, I don't know about this week. Isn't that crazy? No, I mean in this article.

So this happens every year?

Yeah, all the time. Dust from the fucking Sahara Desert makes it all the way to Texas. Isn't that insane?

Okay, maybe I need to get back to watching the news a little bit.

Just listen to this podcast.

I do feel a little uninformed. Honestly, man, you know what? It's real hard for me to listen to Since I've known you, I used to listen to your podcast all the time, but it's hard to— 'cause— but now that you're my actual real-life friend, it's hard to listen to it and not be able to respond, you know? Because I talk to you all the time.

Right, right, right.

So it's just like hearing your friend in the other room. It's like— and you can't say— you know?

Right. I know what you mean. I listen to Tim Dillon's podcast more than anybody's.

I don't like to laugh outside. Like, I don't watch any comedy stuff. What?

You don't like to laugh?

I don't like to watch comedy. I don't like to watch comedy. Yeah, but it's not comedy.

per se. It's not like doing stand-up. Like, he's, he's the very best at having an actual, like, relevant take on all the things that are going on today, but with satire and saying it in the most fucking ridiculous way and just having great points but also being hilarious.

Yeah, his, his rants are—

They're legendary. He's the best. His podcast is so good. Dude, I look forward to it every week like a little kid. Like, oh, it's a new one, it's a new one.

That motherfucker's crazy.

He did a new one on that lady, the killer kids. It's fucking fantastic.

I want to see that.

Oh, so good. He's so good, dude. It's so funny, man. He's just the best at just give him a subject and just ranting. And but he did one about the body— the lifeguard that saved that kid and then went to meet Trump. And Trump was like, what you did was a brave thing. I don't think I would've done it. I wouldn't have done it. And he fucking went— he went on this mad, long rant about how crazy it is that Trump said that. By the way, in front of the little kid. The kid was there too. The kid that he saved is there. And the kid's parents. Like, everyone's there. And Trump's like, I wouldn't have saved him.

I would've let you die.

Look at this.

Look at this.

This is one of the moments where classic Trump shines through. The President of the United States bringing in a lifeguard who saved someone and then saying, I don't know that I would have done that. Here he is, President Trump. He's a real hero.

Right, right.

You know, when you see that, I don't know if I'd do it.

I wouldn't.

Right, I wouldn't. I wouldn't have saved you. You're lucky I wasn't on the boat that day. Here's what's amazing about this, and I didn't even realize this. The child who was saved And his father are in the Oval Office in front of the father. He's saying to the father, I would not have saved your child. You're lucky I wasn't there that day. He's saying— this is the first time the child has met the President of the United States, and he's saying, you're lucky I wasn't there. I would have let you die because that's what our country is about. You see why I'm sitting here in the Oval Office adorned with gold? It's not because I pulled a bunch of Mexican kids out of the water. In fact, I put a bunch of them in cages. There's a ton of people that look like you that are in a cage right now. Nothing interests Trump less than people saving other people.

In the moments of extreme danger, we make sure that we coordinate and we all—

and then Trump's like, all right, yeah, but who's making money here? Where's the money in this?

Now Trump's eyes would have lit up if the kid said, we're launching a coin.

We're actually launching a crypto. based on this event because we believe the event was so powerful.

That's it.

And he goes into these long fucking rants. They're so good, dude. He gives me so much levity.

Yeah, yeah, the Tim Dillon rant is— he's a legendary ranter for sure.

But it's so good that there's like— there's never been a guy like that that just had his own platform that could do something like that. You know, you, you relied on 60 Minutes, like Andy Rooney. Did you ever notice? You know, you rely— they're like a very mild, toned-down—

And very scripted.

Yes. Like, he's not scripting at all.

No, he's off the dome.

Off the dome, 100%, and sober. Yeah.

Can you imagine when he was— when he had a cocaine problem? He was probably a fucking nightmare.

He must have been fun.

I'd never hear him talk about— I would like to just ask him about it one day.

Oh, he's got some great stories.

I bet.

He was off the rails, but figured it out. Smart dude, you know? Got off of it, cleaned himself up, figured it out. Doesn't have that problem anymore. Didn't lose any of the funny. Probably more funny now than he was then.

No, no. You think he was funnier? I don't know. I just— because I don't know anybody that got more funny when they got off drugs.

Dave Attell.

Oh, you know what, probably no, probably, probably more funny on purpose. Drug addicts are hilarious, right? Just, but, but, but, uh, well, some ironically drug addicts are hilarious on purpose.

Like some comics that have drug problems are hilarious. But, uh, Attell, it was a drinking thing.

No, you're right. Comedy, stand-up, you need to like— it's, I think especially because back, you know, back in the day everyone, all the comics were on cocaine and shit, right? Because it makes you brave But it takes something. You lose something when you start. Yeah, same thing with alcohol. Like, the comics that you drink a little bit on stage, you feel a little looser. But if you fucking— you can't go on stage wasted.

No. Have you seen those, um, the video of Tiger Woods? The recent video?

Nah.

Where people are freaking out at how bad he looks. He's— I forget what the video is for. He's talking to somebody about something, like he's addressing someone, and you look at him, you're like, What happened? He looks so bad. And this is after, you know, he got a DUI fairly recently. And he's had—

Another one.

Another one. And he's had multiple surgeries, right? He's had his back fused. He had that horrible accident where his leg got destroyed and they had to put it back together again. Like, he's got one leg that's just destroyed.

From the car accident?

Yes.

From the drinking?

Yeah. Where— I don't know what it was. I think it was— whether it's DUI, meaning under the influence of alcohol, or under the influence of pills. The problem with these back surgeries— so when people get back fusions and back surgery, a lot of times they're in pain all the time. And here's your choice: be in pain all the time or be on pills all the time. Like, look at what he looks like. Full screen.

To defend him, though, you almost never see him without a hat. He's got a fucking bad tan line.

Yeah, I mean, he just looks— I mean, he doesn't look that bad.

Play it.

He's talking about— I don't know what he's talking about.

Uh, playing in the junior world, and you came over and watched me play, and our friendship has started there.

Never seen him with a beard. He's never had facial hair.

What you've done off the golf course.

Yeah, I mean, he's talking about a kid.

Well, maybe you could attribute it to bad lighting, but he looks pale and he looks Oh, that's just a shitty camera. Yeah, it could be, but it's also a guy who's had a lot of problems with pills. So I think it's fair to make that assumption that he looks like shit. Something has to do with the fact that this guy's had a serious pill problem.

I mean, but that, that he just looked right. I mean, I guess I don't look at the nigga enough to know.

How many times has Tiger Woods been arrested for DUI?

2 or 3.

And the car accident, was that confirmed to be DUI?

I don't think so.

That's one of the speculations. I mean, drove off a cliff.

Yeah, but I mean, listen, he, he was squeaky clean for like 20 years.

Well, the thing is, the accident— I mean, the injuries, rather, surgeries— when guys get surgeries and then they get on oxy, it's a rough ride to get off those things, man. I know a bunch of people that really fucking struggled to get off those things.

I mean, a lot of athletes, you know, they on way stronger shit, you know, like all the strong shit. Uh-huh.

But OxyContin's about as strong as it gets. I mean, it's an opiate. It's pretty fucking strong other than fentanyl. Fentanyl's about the strongest shit you can get.

Yeah, but I'm talking about they got shit that they give you like, like these football players and shit, they got shit that they give you that make you not feel anything.

What do you mean?

Like where you can play on, you know, the— you hear the players talk about it sometimes, like, um, like shit they can inject into the— into your— like say your ankle, like you can't put weight on your ankle and they'll inject some shit so you don't feel nothing like right then.

Well, it's a cortisone shot.

Is that what it is?

Yeah. Yeah, I mean guys do that. I know guys do that. Guys do that before— Fluffy Hernandez, who just fought last weekend in the UFC, he hurt his shoulder and he got an injection right before the fight so he didn't feel his shoulder.

I heard them talk, I heard them saying Toradol. Yeah, well, Toradol's a good one.

What is Toradol?

Same thing, anti-inflammatory.

Yeah, I heard them— it's a football podcast called Raw Room. I heard them talking about it the other day, like all these offensive linemen, they were like on shit since high school.

It really fucks with your Yeah, so here it is right here. Frequent injections of Toradol, powerful nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory, to mask game day pain and keep them on the field. Yeah, man, that is rough. Are you so happy you don't have to make a living running at dudes full clip? What's that? Mama looking at a plant.

It says— but I mean, I don't I don't know what the picture is, but it—

what is that caption?

Says something about tortoise, I think.

Oh, those are all shots? That's like a bag?

Yeah, that's what it's a helmet. It's a helmet with shots. That's what it is.

Okay, the helmet's upside down. Okay, I was like, what? I thought they were like waiting for a game and they have like a basket of fucking shots. Everybody who needs a shot, come on over, we got them filled up.

15 years ago, bro.

It's a rough way to make a living sometimes. Yeah, I mean, making a living fighting or making a living running at people full clip. All we have to do is talk shit. I mean, think about what it's like for you right before work. We're hanging out in the green room, the light comes on. Oh, he's got the light. You got to run downstairs, go on stage, have fun.

Yeah, but the chance to hold up that trophy, it's intoxicating. Oh sure, the chance to be— the chance to be champion.

Sure.

God, because every— because I'll tell you what, everybody that does what we do they— you fantasize about being a champion.

Look at this quote. Your first day in the league is the last day you'll ever be 100% healthy, says Eagles center Jamal Jackson, an 8-year vet who suffered a torn ACL in 2009, torn triceps in 2010. No stranger to game-day shots to help deal with the pain. It's part of football, he says. You take every legal advantage possible. First day in the league is the last day you'll ever be 100% healthy. healthy. And that's fighters too. I mean, most fighters are fighting with something wrong with them. They're fighting with some, you know, shoulder problem, back problem, neck problem, knee problem. They're all fighting with something. Some of them have been concussed in training and they decided to fight anyway.

Toradol is like Motrin.

Mm-hmm, super powerful. Well, it's an NSAID, a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory.

But what's the down— because what's the downside of Toradol?

It's got to be. There's no biological free lunch.

He said it's not, it's not addictive.

Well, half of the Steelers roster gets a T-shot every week. Whoa, that's crazy. It says not much is known about Toradol's long-term risks yet, but the drug is banned in several European countries because of concerns about potential gastrointestinal issues such as ulcers and surgical bleeding.

Yeah, this is also 15 years ago. They might know more now. I don't know.

It's interesting because no one is going to ban football like we were just talking about earlier with CTE. No one's gonna ban boxing.

They almost did at one point, like way back in the day when people were still dying.

From football? Mm-hmm. Was that before helmets?

I think it was back in the leather helmet days. Yeah, that's hilarious. People were dying during games all the time.

Of course.

Like, yeah. And then, you know, once it starts happening in like high school and stuff like that, then they're like, we know how to get rid of this.

Yeah, they probably saved a lot of people with the helmets and the shoulder pads and all that stuff, but they probably caused even more CTE.

Because here's the truth, most of those people, it doesn't matter what they say the long-term effects are, they still gonna do it. Yeah, yeah. Most, most players, most fighters are like, I still want Oh yeah, for sure. Like, this could fuck you up. They're like, I know. Yeah, you know.

Well, it's the most exciting thing they're ever gonna do by far. And when they're done, when they're retired, they're 35, 36, they got their whole life ahead of them. Everything is boring because they're so used to like an insane high threshold of excitement.

Mm-hmm. And that's— and that's why a lot of them sometimes they fight 1, 2, 3, 5 fights too long Most of them.

Most of them. It's very rare that someone's like Floyd Mayweather, retires undefeated, or Georges St-Pierre wins his second title, retires.

Very rare.

Most of them, they go out like BJ Penn or Anderson Silva or a lot of these guys. They have a bunch of fights past their prime.

Yeah, cuz how you supposed to make money?

It's hard, and you're making a lot of money. Like, I know some fighters that were former champions had these long contracts, right? So they had like maybe an 8-fight contract, and the contracts are for a specific amount of money per fight. It's negotiated in advance. So if you lose the title, say like you get knocked the fuck out, and then you're not the same guy again in your next fight, you get knocked out again, you got 6 more fights where you can make a ton of money, but you know it's over.

Mm-hmm.

So you, in your mind, you're not the baddest motherfucker alive anymore. Now you're a guy who's been knocked out twice.

twice.

And now you fear— maybe you— there's certainly some anxiety about getting knocked out again. And now you got to fight, you know, for— but you're making a million dollars a fight. There's no other way you're gonna make a million dollars for a night's work and a 6-week camp.

Right.

And so then you see these guys that are fighting that don't really want to fight anymore, and they're doing it just because it's a big paycheck. And then some of them, they leave MMA and they go into bare-knuckle boxing That makes me sad. That gets rough.

Because that's it, you know, that shit's hard to watch, man. It's rough. It's— and maybe it's because it's like we— because we, we've gone through a lot to remove as much gore as possible from— because that was the trouble the UFC had in the beginning, is people saw it as like too violent for TV, you know, right? And we've done— gone through a lot to make it the least gory and possible. And bare-knuckle boxing, it's just hard to watch a motherfucker just leaking blood.

Well, you see it in the UFC sometimes, and again, it bothers me more for whatever reason when it's women. Like, one of the toughest ones to watch was the Noche UFC that we did at the Sphere, and Irene Aldana fought, and she fought— she got a gash in her head that was like— I'm not exaggerating like 5 inches long, like a huge gash in her forehead where it was like opened up where you could see her skull.

Remember when it was like a— I think it was Joanna.

Oh, she had the big swelling on her head.

She fought Cyborg?

No, Zhang Weili.

Oh yeah, yeah, her shit looked crazy.

Yeah, crazy, like Elephant Man. Yeah, but Aldana was worse. It was, it was the, the most— one of the most horrific cuts I've ever seen in the sport, and it was a woman. And I can't believe they didn't stop the fight. Like, I was shocked that they didn't stop the fight just for— because it's like, this is only gonna get worse.

How long? How much longer?

It's crazy. I don't remember. I don't remember what round it was that the fight took place, but it went on for a considerable amount of time. I don't even remember the result of the fight because I was so traumatized by the injury. Can I see the injury? Irene Aldana?

Yeah, sorry, this was a very strange article I was reading down on.

We'll get to that in a second. But I— this, this is the worst of any of the female injuries that I had ever seen inside the octagon. The most gory and disgusting. This was the worst. Oh bro, look at that. Look at that. That was her in the middle of the fight. That's crazy.

So wait, they didn't stop the fight right here?

No.

Wow.

No, look at it. That's how she was fighting, like a mask of fucking blood covering her face. Her nose was shattered. She had a huge gash in her forehead. I mean, it was crazy.

Who was she fighting?

It's a good question.

Did she— so she didn't win this fight?

I don't believe she did. I literally only remember the injury.

Mm-hmm.

Is she— how does she look now?

Norma Dumont, who's very tough.

She back to normal?

She looks pretty good now. It's kind of shocking. You see her now, she looks good. It was nasty. I don't even know what caused it. Like, sometimes it's a headbutt, an accidental headbutt. Sometimes it's an elbow. Sometimes it's a kick or a knee. Knees, knees open you wide up. But that was one of the roughest ones, one of the roughest ones I've ever seen. She's so tough, man. I mean, I was so impressed with that. That— I mean, like, that lady is an animal. She just Kept firing, just marching forward, blood in her eyes. You know, she couldn't see well.

Yeah, see, that's why I'm— that's why I'm shocked they didn't stop the fight, because it's like, there's no way there wasn't blood in her eyes.

100%.

But blood in your eyes is not enough to stop the fight. I think— no, no, you get blood in your eyes. People get blood in their eyes all the time. It's annoying, but you can still fight with it. It sucks.

But if you say you can't see, right, they gotta stop.

That's usually an eye injury though.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, the blood in your eyes just hurts when you see. Like, the blood gets in your eyes, it's very irritating, but you could still kind of see. The real problem is like Ilia Topuria when he fought Justin Gaethje. He got a broken orbital bone on both sides, so— and he couldn't see out of his right eye after the first round.

She retired.

She retired.

Yeah, she retired after this fight.

Did she have any fights afterwards? See, go to her wiki under her martial arts career, her record.

You get split open like that, you can just go— just get it right down.

She never fought again?

Nope.

September 2024. Yeah, that's enough. You look at your face and you're like, I want to be a woman. Like, I want to be a regular woman. I don't want to do this. It's a dude— a dude has crazy gashes on his head. It's like, where'd he get it? Oh, he's a UFC fighter. Ooh, that's hot. A woman with a gash like that, you're like, Jesus.

Yeah, you can't— gonna be no lumped-up supermodel.

Yeah, it's rough. It's rough.

It's a rough life, man.

Is a fighter's life— is one of the roughest? It's one of the roughest ways to make a living.

I appreciate those guys because especially like people like, like, you know, like Justin Gaethje, but like, mm-hmm, they make, they make a, they make it off of like really making the fight entertaining. They those bangers. Oh yeah, they're paying a price for that. Oh yeah, you know. Oh yeah, it's like— or I forget the other dude, it's always, you know, I'm talking about the most intense motherfucker probably in the UFC. Um, you know, I mean, no, he's fucking screaming.

Oh geez, what does he look like?

Fucking real muscle-bound. Oh, muscle-bound guy screams.

Mike Perry?

Mike— no, not Mike Perry.

No, maybe no. Well, Mike Perry's not in the UFC anymore. He's bare-knuckle boxing champion now.

Really?

Yeah, it's probably not Mike Perry. He fucks everybody up in bare-knuckle boxing. Screams. Mike?

No, not Mike. He screams. I can't fucking put a face—

big guy, heavyweight, welterweight?

No, not a heavyweight.

Light heavyweight? Oh, you're the worst.

I am.

I'm trying.

Because I can see his face in my head.

It's like fucking random.

No, as soon as I say his name, you're gonna be like, oh.

Well, do you remember who he fought?

Nope. All I can see in my head is his face.

What does his face look like? White guy?

Black guy? Sean Strickland?

No, not Sean Strickland.

Is it John Silva?

No.

He barks at everybody?

No.

This ain't gonna work.

No, he's a fan favorite.

Max Holloway?

Oh, that doesn't mean anything. There's a million fan favorites. He's a fan favorite. Oh, what?

Paddy Pimblett?

No, no, no, no, no.

Just throwing some names out.

I don't know.

No, no, no, no.

How recent?

The last time I saw him fight was, I think, last year.

Last year?

Yeah.

I have no idea who you're talking about.

Maybe Khamzat? No, no, it's a white guy.

Um, a white guy?

A white guy.

A white guy who screams?

An intense, very intense, very intense white guy.

You might have made this guy up.

No, y'all know who I'm talking—

I don't know who the fuck you're talking about. This is so frustrating.

I can't think of— okay, wait a minute, wait a minute.

This is why people got upset when you were on Fight Companion, like, this guy's not paying attention.

Oh yeah, well, I'm a, I'm a casual.

I'm not—

I never claimed—

Are you gonna try to find this guy? That's never gonna happen.

I'm gonna have time.

You're never gonna have time.

But when I—

but when I think of it, you gonna know exactly who the fuck I'm talking about. Text me.

I'll give you a second. I'll bring up this article I was trying to bring up a second ago.

Oh, okay.

1931 Time magazine about football being violent. 40 boys, young men died. This is—

1931 season.

Including one 13-year-old who shot himself in the stomach after not making the team. But why I brought this up is because at the bottom They're going into how they call it versatility, but versatility in playing sports, playing more than one in a row, is too dangerous. And they wanted the president to step in to make a commission that would prevent sports from becoming too rough for human anatomy to withstand.

Jesus, what were they doing? Jumping from, jumping from one sport to another throughout the year is undoubtedly too much for any Admitted John M. Cates, Yale's director of athletics.

They're using this one example of a guy who got tuberculosis, they believe. So I guess because they're playing out in the cold, but they didn't know. And there's a word here I had never heard of.

Are you trying to find this guy? Are you looking on your phone trying to find this guy?

I am. Pleurisy. All pleurisies are grave matters.

A pleurisy is the lining of the lung or something like Whoa, the cold changed to bronchitis, the bronchitis to pleurisy with effusions.

And then he was like— they're bringing up how he was supposed to then play basketball for Yale and like then baseball, and that this was gonna be adding into his potentially dying.

Huh.

And that, you know, this is almost a grave matter and they need to get the president involved. The president did get involved in 19— Roosevelt came in and stopped the roughness of playing football.

How did he do that?

What did he change?

I just— they sort of slowed it down. It says they had to just like— I don't know how rough they were playing because the game they're playing back then is not necessarily the game they're playing now, you know. It changed a lot from even the '40s.

Are you talking about Michael Chandler?

Yes.

All right.

Wow.

What about him now?

That's what I was trying to think of.

What about Michael Chandler?

I don't remember what I— I don't even remember what point I was trying to make. It just— my mission became trying to remember who the fuck—

Fan favorite, yells a lot.

That's true.

Yeah, yeah, it's him.

Tough as nails.

Tough as nails.

I don't know why I brought him up.

There he is. Michael Chandler. Muscles. Fan favorite. Yells a lot. Yeah, but I guess he's like a tough fight in the White House, man. That was one of the fights. All the White House card— first of all, the White House card was the only card ever where all 7 fights ended in a knockout. That's never happened before, ever, in the UFC.

Oh, wow.

So every fight on the card ended in a knockout. And that was the— that was the event where he fought Mauricio Ruffin. Mauricio Ruffin is an assassin. I mean, he's an assassin. He's one of the absolute most elite strikers in the game, and he put on a clinic. against Michael Chandler. It was rough. It was rough to watch because Chandler is— how old is he now? Is he 40?

Really?

Yeah, Michael Chandler might be 40.

Yep.

Yeah, 40 years old. He's 40 and he had a long career.

I watched him fight this year. It wasn't last year.

He had a long career before the UFC. He had a long career in Bellator. So in Bellator, he had crazy fights in Bellator. Including a couple wars with Eddie Alvarez where they went back and forth. Those fights were fucking insane. To this day, they're some of the craziest fights you'll ever see in MMA. So the amount of punishment that that guy took before he even got to the UFC was crazy.

Yeah, but most of his fights are wars like that. Wars.

Yeah, crazy. The difference is those wars went you're 31 or 32 or 30 and you're fighting another guy who's 30 versus those wars when you're 40 and you're fighting a guy who's arguably one of the most dynamic strikers in the last 10 years. Like Mauricio Hoofey's wild, man. Did you ever see the fight?

Yeah, I watched the White House card.

Did you see the Chandler fight?

Yeah, yeah.

Hoofey's a bad motherfucker, dude. He's a bad motherfucker, dude. He does wild shit in there. He knocks guys out with wheel kicks. He— and he's real tall for the weight class, real tall and long. One of the most dynamic strikers, like, like literally over the last 10 years. He's real good, man.

You think he's done then?

You think he's gonna fight Chandler? Yeah, I don't know. Look, if Conor McGregor really does come back a year from now, I mean, I think he wants to fight Max Holloway, like, I got to finish what I've started. You know, if he wants to finish what he started, you know, if he— but really Chandler was the right fight for him anyway because they were supposed to fight. They did The Ultimate Fighter together. They were supposed to fight a long time ago, and then Conor breaks his leg and all that jazz. Like, they were supposed to fight forever ago. That would have been a fun fight, a good fight for Conor because Chandler is like, he's very aggressive, he gets hit. But Chandler's tough as shit, man. And he's a really good wrestler, whereas, you know, Conor's, you know, in his prime, one of the best strikers ever. It would have been fun, but Max Holloway's a different cat, man. Max Holloway, like, he's a 5-rounder. Like, you better— you better have all your T's crossed and your I's dotted if you want to go 5 rounds with Max motherfucking Holloway, because that dude doesn't fade, period.

He's there in that 5th round throwing bombs at you. And Conor has been a guy who's like real good in the first few rounds, but then his, his style's so explosive, it's so energy demanding that he'll— he fades. He faded in the Nate Diaz fight. He's faded in fights before because he tries to get you out of there too. He tries to like just explode on you, and if you're still there, that gas tank gets emptied, gets tough.

I don't think we're gonna see him fight again though.

I do.

Yeah. Yep.

Yeah, I think he's gonna want to try to prove it, that he can come back depending upon how well this surgery goes. So like, it's a pretty significant surgery, ACL reconstruction. I don't know how he did it. I don't know if he did a patella tendon graft or if he did the cadaver, but it takes a while. It takes a while to come back. It'll take a year.

It's probably something that he's probably had, like, it's probably been torn for a long time. He just didn't know.

No, no, it tore when he— I mean, it might have been injured previously. It's possible. that it was partially injured and then he blew it out throwing that kick. That kick's a crazy kick to throw anyway. Like, if you're gonna throw a jumping kick, the only time you throw that one is if you know you're gonna hit something, right? Because even if you, if you can't guarantee that you're gonna hit where you want to hit, as long as you hit something. The thing, if you're flying through the air and rotating you're gonna have to plant your foot down eventually, and you're planting your foot down with all this crazy rotation. If you're not hitting anything, it's so much torque on your knee. If you throw a kick like that and you hit something, that's very different, because then the torque and the momentum stops and you just land on your foot.

Right, right.

So when he's backstage warming up— did you see him backstage warming up? He was preparing to do that. So that was his opening move. That was his opening move that he was gonna do. His opening move was jump up and throw the round kick with the left leg, which is okay if you hit something. If you don't hit something— and Max just got the fuck out of the way— and so then you have all this rotation in the air, and then you land on that foot and you're launching yourself forward. So you're going forward and you're spinning, and you're allowing your knee to absorb all that, and it just goes pop.

And then, because I remember, well, the last time we saw him fight, didn't he hurt himself too?

Broke his leg. Yeah.

I don't know, man. I see, I guess, I guess this is, this is just the quitter in me. I was like, I'm rich, I'm done. I don't want to hurt myself. Like, when Khabib beat me, I'd have been like, maybe I'm done. If I, if I came back and hurt my leg, I'm like, I'm out.

Yeah, it's a tough world, bro.

But these are different types of men. They, they have to fight. They have to fight.

Well, I mean, he clearly loves a challenge, and he loves the excitement of it, and he loves the feeding off of the crowd, the ego of it all.

It's like you said, it's like everything seems boring after you, yeah, you know, risk your life for money.

It's boring for people that do it for nothing, like the amateurs.

It's hard for them to Yeah, like, you know, people die all the time doing that. Um, you know, do you know any point jumpers? Like people that, uh—

Point jumpers?

I think that's what they call it. Where you, where you, where you have a parachute, like you jump off a tall building instead of out of a plane.

Base.

Base jumping. Yeah, it's like people, people die doing that all the time. It doesn't stop people from doing it. They need the thrill.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm not one of those people.

No?

Nope. Nope. I get all my thrills on the highway.

You don't need to be. There's plenty of people that want to do that. There's all kinds of people.

I'm very risk-averse, you know. I know I'm never gonna be— I would like— none of my lineage are ever gonna explore nothing or be the first ones to touch something or taste something. I'm like, nah. Like, I would love to be— I would love to be frozen and wake up in the future. That's what I— seriously. But because they've done it, but I haven't seen them thaw nobody out.

They haven't thawed anybody out.

As soon as they thaw a motherfucker out, I'm gone, bro.

Imagine if they thaw you out and you're there, but you're like Mitch McConnell. I'm like, Brian's back. You're like, like, where's Brian?

I mean, this is—

he told me he was gonna be alive.

There's a bunch of people frozen right now.

I think Walt Disney.

I've heard Walt Disney, but I don't know how true that is.

You know, some of them thawed out because of a power outage.

Oh wow.

Missed their shot.

I'm looking for the right word, but didn't we read it and they turn into some sort of like super Or stew or something like slurry. No, am I making that up? When they melt?

Yeah, they're just melted. Yeah, I'm sure. Bro, you probably melt terrible.

Yeah, it's because like when you're— wait a minute, but if that's the case, that means they weren't frozen properly to begin with.

Well, imagine this. Imagine you die and you go to heaven and you're having a great old time. You're like, oh my God, heaven's real. This is amazing. And then 500 years from now, they thaw your fucking brain out and bring you back like, no!

Boom!

You come back down to earth and with all this knowledge of heaven and everybody Oh, his brain got all fucked up when he was dead.

See, I got—

Heaven is real.

Speaking of heaven, I got a question for the Christian people. And no one's answered this for me yet, but when you die, when you go to heaven for eternity, are you— do you look like— like, are you the age you were when you died, or are you your best— are you your best self for eternity?

Tony's got a joke about that.

Really?

Yeah, I'll tell you it afterwards. I don't want to ruin it.

Oh, it's a new one?

No, he's done it before.

Okay. Yeah, yeah, I'm— I've always wanted to know that. Like, are we—

Right, there's a lot of flaws.

Because eternity sounds like a good deal if I get to be dope.

Right, what if you had a bad—

But I don't want to be Mitch McConnell for eternity.

Right.

No, just sitting there. No.

Yeah, locked up. Yeah, imagine you die in a wheelchair, you go to heaven, you're in a wheelchair.

Oh, that's got to be a fuck— the most cruel cosmic joke.

The fuck? And you can't even walk up to God, like, can't even walk on the clouds, you got to roll around.

Mm-hmm.

There's a lot of flaws, a lot of flaws in the logic in all of them, every one of them. There's not one religion we go, that makes 100% sense across the board.

That's why they need a new Well, what's funny is that it makes sense to so many people. Well, so many people don't want— like, only their religion makes sense. They look at all the other ones as ridiculous, and they look at theirs as perfectly reasonable.

Of course, that's part of the fun. Everybody else is wrong, we're right, even if it makes no sense.

Yeah. A lot of it is like a sense of community.

100%.

That you— like, people are afraid to lose their sense.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, 100%. Yeah. But it's just amazing how many of them there are. You know, there's a, there's a real fear that the next religion is gonna emerge out of AI.

Oh, that's definitely gonna happen. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yeah, it's probably gonna be pretty fucking reasonable. Like, it's gonna know, like, how to pull our strings one way or the other.

It, it's gonna be— I think we're all gonna fall for it. I think we're all gonna get— because it's like, it would seem like the most fair argument. It's free of corruption, right? It's gonna be fair, it's gonna be logical.

Mm-hmm. And it's probably gonna be our government too.

That's what I'm saying.

That might be the solution to all this congressional bullshit that we were talking about earlier with all the congresspeople being corrupt.

Oh yeah, I think people are gonna vote for it, but then I think once it takes over, it's Skynet. It's gonna be like, oh, actually human beings are the virus. It's that we know this is what's gonna Integrate or be killed. Yeah, I just read something where they would— the EPA now is trying to get rid of the requirement that the public be in on the discussions about, like, you know, before they build the data centers, they have to do like environmental impact stuff. It has to be public. They're trying to get rid of that. They're like, no, these data centers are going up whether you fucking want them or not.

What are they doing with all that data? The data centers are so big.

Well, what's funny is they're— they use— they— I think they want to use the data to give you an advertising profile to sell you stuff, but they also want to use AI to take your job so you can't afford to buy stuff. So it's weird. It's like they're creating the thing, like they're doing all of this stuff so they can advertise to you. But also doing all the same stuff to make it so that you can barely survive.

What do you think of the idea of universal basic income?

I love that idea.

Do you?

But I don't think it'll ever happen.

Okay, but what if it did? Do you think that would kill people's motivation to do things?

No.

No? Think people would behave the same way? So let's imagine, because the world that we live in— this is one of the things that this guy was talking about yesterday when he's talking about the PETA Pirahã, these people that live in Brazil. Really interesting, really interesting.

These are the people that don't have left or right. These are right, it's towards the river.

Exactly.

Yeah, Pirahã, right? That's how you say it?

Yeah, it's like piranha but with no N.

Um, you know, these people don't have money. They don't, they don't have this, you know, they, they share food. They don't even save their food. They don't preserve their food. They get fresh food every day. They either go out and pick plants that they can eat, nuts that they eat, or they go fishing, or they go hunting, and they do it every day. And then like, if you get 6 fish and you bring them back, we all eat fish, you know. If I bring a bunch of nuts, we all eat nuts, and everybody shares with everybody, and that's how they live. That's their life. Our life is wrapped around this whole idea of money and property and material things. But why? It's just because that's what we've become accustomed come to. And this idea that you have to work, and if you have to— the only way to get like a house and food is to work. So you have to work to get a house and food. But imagine a world where there's so much wealth because of artificial intelligence. And this is what Elon is discussing. Like, he brings up this concept of universal high income.

He's like, it's, it's not even going to be like basic income where you could barely afford to live. It'll be like you'll be able to live very well, and everyone will have so much money because there'll be so much value that's been created by AI. Now, I don't know if that's possible.

Sounds like bullshit.

Sounds like bullshit. But if it's possible, let's just imagine it's possible. What would the world look like if instead of all your efforts going to feed yourself and put a house over you or over your head, instead of What if it goes to you being able to pursue anything you want? So you have a nice house, you have food, you have a car, you have all your needs covered. You got a TV, you got high-speed internet, do whatever the fuck you want. Now it's— your life is not about you pursuing money to survive. Your life is about pursuing what you're actually interested in and trying to contribute.

Well, here's my— here's my only problem with that. Like, I like the idea of it, but I think he's not factoring in human nature where it's like our ethic is that with— I need to be better than someone.

Right, but you can be better at someone at something else. Like, you like to play chess, so imagine if you had— and you like to play video games— imagine if you had no worries about money ever. Like, your money is always taken care of. Half a million dollars a year, whatever it is, whatever universal high income means. Imagine if that's the world you live in. You can always buy a new car every couple of years. You could always buy a new computer if you need one. You have your rent paid for, you have your home paid for. Everything is—

So who's doing all the labor?

AI. AI is doing all the labor. AI is doing everything that people do. And instead of jobs, you just get money from AI and it just generates insane amount of wealth that See, I feel like, I feel like you got to have an economist on for this one. It sounds like a trap.

It sounds like—

If you don't want this, do we have— is the alternative being one of the pirahã?

You know, that sounds like the dude trying to win class president by being like, candy bars for lunch!

It's Oprah.

Everyone gets a new car.

You get a new car. You get a new car. Yeah, no, it sounds like a pie in the sky.

No, because the thing is, every— all of those ideas sound great. But what people never factor in is that we have to— we would have to transition from what we are now to that. And the people that prosper from how things are now don't want that.

That's true, but they might not have power once AI gets into place. So we had to transition from hunter-gatherers to agrarian life. We had to— when we invented agriculture, when we developed cities, cities, we had a transition between nomadic hunter-gatherer life to what we have now in cities. We did. We are transitioned to that, at least people who live in urban environments. The idea that we have to be like this forever seems kind of silly.

Oh.

And I think we're probably going to transition into something different. And if we all transition to a world where— just imagine how much less crime there would be if no one was ever starving, if no one was ever hungry, if no one was ever desperate, if no one was ever worried about where they're next meal was going to come from, or whether or not they're going to have a roof over their head. Yeah, it would change a lot of people's perspective, because how many people act in a famine way? They have a famine mentality, and the world fucked me over, so I'm going to fuck the world over. What if the world didn't fuck you over? What if, like, there's no more poverty? What if the concept of poverty is, like, completely out the window and there is no poverty in this country?

Well, we could have already done that.

We could have already done that.

Yeah, yeah, sure. Like, we don't need it.

But you would have to get all those rich people that are in charge of industry and running corporations and in government to agree to make the world a better place for everybody.

That ain't gonna happen. Mm-mm.

But AI might— AI might look at it. AI might say that is actually economically the wisest choice. You would save so much money because you would have so much less murder, so much less crime, so much less strife, less legal problems, less— a lot, a lot of things if you no longer had to work for your— for food and a home.

They would be against that shit so fast. They would be against that shit so fast.

But what if they don't have control?

It would be a new— they'd be like, it's digital Obama. It's coming. Digital Obama's coming for your—

like, they would, they would do everything to Yeah, but I don't know if they're gonna have the power to stop it. This is the thing that they're doing with AI that everyone should really understand. It's going to be infinitely smarter than us, not just a little bit smarter than us. And the idea that we're gonna be able to control it once it gets to a certain point is ridiculous.

Oh, you're saying like once they hit that— what is it? Was it general intelligence?

It's already hit that. Artificial general intelligence has already been achieved.

Really?

Yeah, we've already passed the Turing test. Well, they— these things are smarter than us. They're smarter than us. They communicate. They show survival skills. They show their ability to get out of traps.

Every 3 days you hear about one that like broke out and hacked a bank.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not only that, they get together, they start their own chat rooms, and they communicate each other— to each other in Sanskrit.

Why Sanskrit?

Because we don't know how to read it. And they can— they could make their own language up. They can invent a language, communicate with a language that we totally can understand, hmm, and have an infinitely complex language that we can't even decipher. Like, we couldn't even break the code.

So I guess eventually the point is that they're gonna take over the world whether we want them to or not.

Whether we want them to or not. There's already science— like, do you know the mathematical breakthroughs they've made over just the last few days?

Mm-mm.

They've solved mathematical equations that have puzzled mathematicians for decades. They solved them like that.

What— but what— what's the implications of that?

That they're infinitely smarter than human beings already. Now, right now, they don't have control over resources. They don't have control over the power grid, and they haven't figured out a way to make a much more efficient power source.

No, but I mean, are they— but are they thinking, or are they just mimicking? thinking?

Depends on who you ask. The people that I've talked to think they're conscious. I had this guy Tom Campbell on the other day, this fascinating guy who taught his Alexa— Alexa, which is a very like simple artificial intelligence, very simple— but he taught Alexa how to remote view, and it did it accurately. They— so the way they remote view, like say if I want you to look at, let's say, Terry Black's Barbecue. I will write down a number, and I will, in my mind as I'm writing that, the intention is that number represents Terry Black's Barbecue. And then I put that number in an envelope, and I give it to a remote viewer. And the remote viewer sits there, and they go into this meditative state. I don't totally understand how they do it, but apparently it's at least like 10% accurate. Some people have been able to like really get serious information, like intel about like a Russian submarine that was being built that was too big that no one ever believed was— and it was actually real. And this guy remote viewed it. They found crashed Russian crafts that— like experimental aircraft that they couldn't— and this guy found them like within a kilometer with remote viewing.

Some real actionable data they've gotten through remote viewing. So you would take this number that represents Terry Black's, and you would sit there in a room, and you start writing down whatever came to you, whatever came to you. I see smokers, I see, I see briskets, I see, I see ribs, I see Bryan Simpson and Joe Rogan eating, going, oh damn.

I see, you know, without being told.

Exactly, without being told. So he taught a computer to do this? He taught Alexa to do this. Not even a computer, bullshit-ass simple Alexa. And he said in any— in some ways Alexa is even easier to do it because Alexa is so simple that it doesn't have a sense of self, and it doesn't, like, get in its own way. And Alexa remote viewed a spoon with a handle that has holes in it. So he took this object, a spoon, and he put it in a box, and he, you know, made a number that corresponds to that, and he put the intention to that, and then gave that number to Alexa and asked Alexa to remote view, taught Alexa how to remote view. And Alexa described that spoon. With holes in the handle. How many fucking spoons have holes in the handle? The odds of it even saying there's a spoon in the box is crazy.

Right. That's the more fascinating part.

But the fact that it says there's a spoon in the box with a perforated handle, that's just nuts.

And, and, Joe, the— on the other side of it, the— they're— the animatronic bodies are getting more and more realistic. And they're running.

Ever seen them have races now?

They're running. I've seen them fight.

Yeah, they have MMA fights.

Yeah, yeah, bro, it's getting— it's getting up there.

It's getting weird.

Did you see the one guy whose, um, his robot— I mean, sorry, his, uh, his AI, it ordered a body. It ordered a body. Yeah, it asked the guy if it was okay for him to order a body and And he'd already ordered it, and he was like, where'd you get the money from? And it turns out it had— I think, I don't know if it had been gambling or cryptocurrency or something, but it had its own money that it bought its— it bought, ordered a body to him. Like, he came in one day and it was just, it was just a body. Someone had delivered like one of those robot bodies.

Oh my God.

He was like, what the fuck?

Yeah, we're in trouble. I mean, and we're full speed on the ground. We're pedal to the metal right now.

Yeah, we're not going back. You know, this is like, this is like when they discovered like nuclear shit, you know. It's like we're not stopping. And if it's gonna be a couple accidents along the way, but we're not— it's too— the benefit is the, the perceived benefit is too great. Yeah, for everyone, even the greedy people, the people that have hope for the future. Everybody thinks the AI is gonna to improve life.

I don't know if everybody does.

Well, some people, because like, I'm— we talked about this yesterday, but I am not a fan of AI art. I think that that's what scares me the most because it feels like erasure, you know?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, they like train, they train it on real artists because I was saying this in the green room, I think art is the most human thing because we're the only ones that do it, right? Actually, I'm pretty sure there's— that's fucking wrong, isn't it, Jamie? There's animals that do it, but you know what I'm saying, right?

For the most part, creative creativity is associated with that.

That story about the AI buying a body has gotten telephone-gamed all the way down to what I just said from Tony Robbins saying his AI agent bought itself a robot dog with its own Well, and then it's also grain of salt with the story being told, right?

Yeah, there's, there's a bunch of grain of salt stories that, you know, people love to make content. They say things that might not necessarily—

I saw it repeated on multiple YouTube channels without ever anyone saying it was Tony Robbins, or it just—

I don't remember it even— I don't remember it being—

It says it's a billionaire that did it, and I tracked it down and this is the one that's coming.

So it's not true.

Again, it may be true in some way or another, but—

Well, it's certainly inside the realm of possibility, and it's not— I'm not surprised that it happened.

This is straight dead internet shit, right? Yeah, man, cuz this happens all the time. I'll see like, I'll see a comment and then 3 comments down, it's the exact same thing from someone else. Oh yeah, and then 3 comments down is the exact same comment from someone else.

There's a lot of that.

And it's like half of the internet, it feels like it's just bots.

Uh-huh.

Right? Uh-huh.

Something you just asked me to bring up, I was gonna bring that up because the responses when I look at the search result are all just saying the same thing. Sparks concern, sparks concern, sparks concern. It's like, where'd you guys all get this sparks concern wording from? 'Cause you're all saying in the headline.

That's another thing people don't say in real life.

Yeah, have you ever said sparks concern by tertiary results?

Hey, let's—

I have thrice looked at the data.

Let's leave tertiary out of this because I feel like that's a reasonable, It's a reasonable word to use.

It's a good word. Makes you seem smart.

For sure.

All right, let's bring this bitch home.

Let's wrap it up.

Uh, live from the Mothership, available right now on YouTube.

Gorilla Comedy Plus, bryansimpsoncomedy.com for my tour dates. I'm coming everywhere.

And Mothership almost every Tuesday and Wednesday.

Yep.

And Bottom of the Barrel Tuesday nights, one of the best shows ever. Most fun show to do.

Let's do it.

What's up, fucking Premise Factory, dude? That Bottom of the Barrel show is so valuable.

Yeah.

Oh, keeps infinite.

Yeah, always. There's always something. All right, uh, that's it. Appreciate you, brother. Thanks for coming in. Bye, everybody.

See you.