Transcript of Reacting To The Spirit Airlines Collapse: "They Are Historic Losers" | Hour 1 New

This is the Dan Lebatard Show with the Stugatz Podcast.

This episode of the Dan Lebatard Show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

That's got to be a record.

It's pretty good. So the hate watching continued into yesterday. But yesterday's Game 7 with the Stanley Cup playoffs, Mike, that was, that was a weird watch. That, that was, that was an interesting watch. Like Game 7 of the Stanley Cup, Game 7s in the NBA yesterday were horrible. All right. And, and it's a weird thing, right? With the NBA where I, I don't have the info in front of me, but it feels like Game 7 can be a dud a lot in the NBA, which is kind of strange, right? But in the Stanley Cup playoffs, whoo! It's usually a great, great game, and the Stanley Cup was super compelling yesterday. The game was tight throughout, but holy shit, like, the Canadiens had 4 shots on goal going into the third period.

Yeah, I couldn't believe it. I kept having to ask if the, uh, the graphic was wrong.

And the game was tied, by the way.

Yeah, it was. Yeah, they scored on one of their 4 shots through 2 periods.

Good shooting percentage.

But I mean, you've been there on the other side of that where you're like, we're totally going to lose this game because it's somehow tied because we haven't done anything with our 20-shot advantage.

And the game right there is— I mean, I don't think those two things are coincidental. I think you do that. You know, we talk about the curse of Sposta, that when there are advantages in your favor, that it adds pressure to your shoulders that you're supposed to win. When you have 5 times the number of shots as your foe, you suddenly feel like, What is going on here? We're cursed tonight.

It's an interesting season in the NHL, and it was made interesting right off the bat with Barkov's injury opening the door for a lot of new blood in the Eastern Conference. And I'm kind of enjoying seeing the Sabers get their shine, watching the Ducks beat Edmonton. It does feel like we're kind of in a transition phase here. The state of Florida is not going to be in the Stanley Cup Final for the first time in, I think, 6 years. 7 years.

2019 was last time.

Good for the sport.

And the Tampa Bay Lightning's a story here because they've been bounced yet again in the first round.

4 straight years.

They've had this core that thought, like the Carolina Hurricanes, who it's so far working out, it's just insane that they only have to go through the Senators and the Flyers to get to the Eastern Conference Finals. But that's a discussion for another day.

Do you think the Lightning will ever win a first round series again?

This is wild. And Kucherov had a good season. Not the Wild.

They lost. They had a different kind of game last night.

Kucherov had a good season, but again, not— doesn't feel like he's built for the playoffs.

He's been a bum in the playoffs.

Cirelli, Brayden Point. These are guys who are riding downward trajectories and it kind of feels like you got to do something now about this roster. You've been told 4 straight seasons you are not good enough.

I, on one hand, am resentful. I noticed this weekend— I became aware of it, I think on Saturday— I was flipping around the TV and there I saw some Stanley Cup playoff hockey, which after the Penguins went out, I thought was kind of selfish for them to persist with this tournament. I thought, just shut it down. We'll come back next, next October and start fresh. But I also felt validated by the result of the Lightning and, uh, Bleu Blanc et Rouge, um, game. Because I always say that different sports yield different outcomes, but in hockey, the thing about like vet savvy— oh, you need to have vets have been there, done that kind of thing— does not, does not stack up against fresh, more skilled legs. And that's just what you saw. Just because The Habs, I mean the Lightning, are the more well-known entity in terms of the individual players. Give me the lineup that the Habs are rolling out there.

Dave, obviously we got the Kraken, we have the Mammoths, right? All new teams.

Who the blue blanca roo?

Are they a new team in the Eastern Conference? Who are they?

The Habs.

Who the hell?

Who are they?

The Canadiens. Who's Caps? I'm not going to say they're— I'm not going to say that their Stanley Cups are fraudulent, but as a reminder, I have to say this every time. They're even easier to pick apart than the Boston Celtics of the '60s. The Habs—

it—

yeah, does everybody understand that the Original Six— you've heard of it, right, Tony? The original—

Tony, give us the Original Six.

The Original Six: the Blues, the Predators, once the Atlanta Thrashers, the Panthers, the Wild—

yes, one more—

and the Anaheim Ducks.

He didn't name a goddamn one of them. He didn't get one of them right.

Chris, can you give us the Original Six?

I'm not gonna take a quiz. Go ahead. Too much dignity for Chris.

He's not gonna—

Sacre bleu.

Go ahead, Chris. Come on, go ahead. Try one. Canadians, right? The Maple Leafs. Okay, good for you. The Bruins. Okay, come on. These are— now you are actually three-way.

Blackhawks.

Yes. Right.

Come on.

Think about, think about that region.

Yeah, you gotta think about the region.

With the black hat. Rangers.

Yes.

Great.

One more, man.

Not that region, but okay.

Seattle Kraken.

That was it. You almost did it. The Red Wings. Keep it— there you go. Here's the thing with the Original Six.

It went—

there were 6 teams in a major sports league in America. Well, North America.

What?

6 total teams. How much pride do you have in like, we won the title against 5 other teams. We were the best of the half dozen. But also, this went on for 25 years. And also, did you know that the— why did the Canadiens win all those Stanley Cups versus the Rangers, who won, I don't think, any in the 25 years? It's because you had negotiating rights with natives from your hometown within a 50-mile radius.

Really?

Yes. So of course, the Canadian teams— Toronto was also good. Detroit won Stanley Cups too. Why? Because they were right next to the Canadian border. The Rangers and Blackhawks. Who was playing hockey in those cities? Nobody is the answer.

Wow.

So the Lightning blow it last night.

They blow it to the Canadiens, which they played in a Stanley Cup Final, a weird one, when the Habs ended up winning the Western Conference because of COVID They restructured everything and that was 4 seasons ago. And now the Canadiens find themselves— they weren't very good since making it to that Stanley Cup. It was kind of a Cinderella team. Caulfield was still coming online.

This seems actually pretty good.

If you look at their roster, what the difference is for Montreal is they drafted guys and developed guys and now they're really, really good. And meanwhile, Tampa Bay just kept charting their course and sticking with their guys. They did, to their credit, they did get Jake Ensl, which was a big splashy acquisition.

Well, and the guy they let go that wouldn't pay Stamkos, he's like still awesome, right? He's still a great year.

Yeah. Surprisingly living up to the contract that he got in Nashville too. It's just really curious to see what's happened to both those franchises here. And really funny that it was a first-round Stanley Cup.

I loved it. I was so happy.

Lightning only counts for a half, that cup that they got in COVID. Okay, fine by me.

Okay, so after the game last night, here's video. All right, now you may recognize the name. The Montreal Canadiens head coach is Martin St-Louis. All right, all-time great Tampa Bay Lightning player. His jersey number is retired in that arena where he, as the road coach, just won Game 7. Here's St. Louis in the Canadiens dressing room after the game.

This moment reminds me so much of— we've done this before. We're not leaving! The show keeps going!

It's got to be hard, right, if you're a Lightning fan? Because I feel like it's— I feel like it's the equivalent of— I mean, the Lightning's two most beloved players, like, it's St. Louis and LeCavalier, probably, right? And It would be like if Alonzo Mourning were the coach of another team that just won Game 7 at the Heat in a huge upset, right? Like, isn't that a weird experience then if you're a Lightning fan?

Zaslo, um, apparently you do not rank among society's great empaths because less than a week ago my favorite hockey team, the Pittsburgh Penguins, lost in Game 6 in overtime to a team coached by Rick Tocchet. Rick Tocchet's name is scratched into the Stanley Cup underneath the words Pittsburgh Penguins. So I have experienced exactly what you're describing very recently, and it sucked. Now, what I have never seen— I literally, off the top of my head, I've never watched a hockey game, let alone one that counts in the postseason, where a team has 4 shots on goal through 2 periods, 0 shots on goal for the entire period with the season on the line, and then they won the game. I thought that's a great— it is a crazy— it's an all-time loco outcome. And by the way, that happened on the same night in another Stanley Cup playoff game that the final score was 9-6. Craziness. You can argue that the NBA is more popular. Obviously it is. Much more fandom, much more loot behind it. But there is no argument, and it is becoming a pretty consistent pattern now. Amin can argue against this if he would like, but the NHL playoffs are definitely more entertaining than the NBA playoffs.

And that, like I say, that's every year now. The Orlando Magic have fired Jamal Mosley. Oh, head coach.

Told you that. That's one of the things that is certainly not being talked about in sports. That second half from Orlando in Game 6 where they had the Pistons dead to rights.

They were up 24 at home in the third quarter. How you not win that game?

I have a very controversial thought and opinion about what happened.

Okay.

I think Jamal Mosley, he's doing a great job, they're winning, they're kicking the Pistons' ass, this thing's over and done with. He sat down and somewhere a shaman In the crowd went, "Mazula! Mazula!" And like smoke came out of his eyes and he's like, "I must only shoot threes. Timeout. Here, Bane, give it to Bankaro. Another three, please. Shoot threes. Only threes. Only threes." Or, or, wait, wait, wait. Different theory. Did we look at who the ref assignment was in that game? It was probably the guys from Game 7 in Boston. The same guys who said, "You dare step foot in this paint." 2 fouls, technical foul, something, ejection, something has to go wrong. That's it, that's the only 2 explanations. Either he was possessed by Joe Mazzulla or the same crooked refs that told Jaylen Brown, "You're not allowed to do anything but shoot 3s," were doing that same game over there. Back to you guys.

The other night I was staying in. At least, that was the plan. Then the text from my buddy Eagle Eye comes in. Mike, we've got the games on. I say, yeah. I grab a pack of Miller Lite, and immediately my plan's gone. Now it's playoff basketball. Every possession feels huge. Baseball's on another screen, and I, I somehow care about that too. Everybody's got takes flying. Nobody's watching just one thing, and we're all way more into it than we ever expected. It was one of those nights that you take a sip, you look around, and you think, yeah, This was the right move. That's why I reach for Miller Lite. It's clean, refreshing, easy to drink, brewed for taste with simple ingredients. Just 96 calories and 3.2 carbs. The original light beer since 1975, and it still hits different. Cheers to legendary moments with Miller Lite. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlite.com/dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere. They sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

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Don't let me talk.

John, can you rate my Al Pacino from that billiard scene in Carlito's Way if I do it for you? I think it's pretty good.

Yeah.

Okay. Stugatz!

You think you're big time?

Well, you're gonna die! Big time! That is on my infamous scale of 1 to 10, that's a, that's a 7.6.

Solid.

Good job, good job.

That's a Sui nominee right there.

This is the Dan Levatar Show with the Stugatz. I mean, my son, my 14-year-old son, he walked in the room on whatever night that the game was with the Celtics. Saturday night.

I don't like how that starts. My son walked in on the room on whatever night.

Take it easy. Saturday night he walked in.

Danny Zaz is the one walking into the room.

And he literally just says to me, he looks at the TV and he goes, why are all 5 players standing outside the 3-point line? I'm like, that's, that's how they play. They're stupid.

Believe it or not, that's actually like, in terms of why are we starting this offensive thing, everyone out, we want the paint to be open to allow for our premier players to drive and get to the paint and not have to worry about congestion. The problem is when nobody on the court seems to figure out like, oh, I'm the guy who should be driving and not worrying about congestion.

What do we take away from all the open looks that they missed? Because they shot 33% on wide open threes. And I kept looking to see like, I know Paul George historically great perimeter defender, but he's 36 years old, not the same guy. Maxie not definitely known for his point of attack defending. Was Philadelphia doing something or was this just a team that quite simply put missed their shots?

First of all, Paul George was spectacular defensively in this series. He was awesome. And for a guy, he's been a guy who's been a punching bag for a long time. He had a great series. And I think a lot of people need to recognize that. But they didn't have to do anything, Mike. The guy sat in the press conference and said, "Nope, we got the looks we wanted." That's how they play. They are programmed.

They did get the looks they wanted.

But I'm just saying, like, in basketball, we know that there is a level of balance to this, right? When Reggie Miller, a man who is literally in the Hall of Fame for shooting threes, says, "I think you guys are taking too many threes," that is a warning sign. And I hate when people come like, oh, the analytics are— I'm gonna tell you exactly, as a guy who did this, what the analytics say. The number one shot, highest expected point value shot, is a layup or a dunk. That's number one. Number two, a free throw. Number three is a corner three. Number four, above-the-break three. And number five, any mid-range shot, right? So this idea that the math tells you what— that's what gets so Frustrated when Dan's like, the Celtics figured out the math. Like, no, Dan, that's not the math. To just keep shooting threes is not the math. You shoot the best possible shot. An uncontested shot is better than a contested one, and a shot at the rim is better than any other shot on the floor. And the second best shot is getting to the free throw line. And they openly thumb their nose at that and say, we're just gonna shoot a million of these, and when they go in, we'll be champs.

And when they don't, We'll lose to worse teams. We'll lose to the Heat, who are 8th seed. We'll lose to the, to the Sixers, who are 7th seed.

And the Knicks were like a 5 or something.

But I mean, is that a standard sort of what the best shot is, or does that ebb and flow based on how defenses work? Because I would like to see the thing that I just referred to with the NHL playoffs, stylistic differences, the outcome of 2 games, one's 2-1, nail-biter, the other one's 9-6. And I think it's potentially a good thing for the NBA that now you have this aside from, you know, it being Sixers-Knickerbockers. Beyond all that, you have potentially a nice matchup in the pivot, which, which is different than what we've seen for the last, you know, half decade at least in the NBA playoffs, which is just teams jacking up threes and who's making them on a given night.

But see, I feel this is why I always talk about the NBA as a PR problem, because you just said that and we're talking about a team that has Joel Embiid that is this clearly not how they play, right? They're—

no, I'm saying that this, with them winning now, makes them relevant. The Sixers never do anything. So you can't really point at them and say, see, they're playing through the, through the guy in the low post. Well, who cares?

They don't win. They don't do anything. Denver plays through the low post. They won a championship. Oklahoma City plays a lot in the mid-range where, where Shaquille O'Neal operates.

I love it.

They're not an awesome 3-point shooting team. They're a good 3-point shooting team. But it's hardly like the meat and potatoes of their, of their offense. And so they're obviously the best team in basketball. I think there are vast stylistic differences across the NBA. They're all based on your talent.

Who do I have?

What kind of player do I have? If I have a Sheik Gilgeous-Alexander, guess what? We're shooting a bunch of mid-range shots. If I have a, you know, a Joel Embiid, guess what? I'm going to the post. That's how basketball has always been. The part where I say, hey, these are the highest expected point value shots. I'm not telling you how to get them. I'm just telling you this is it. It's in the same way that I tell you, hey, protein is good. I'm not saying, well, you gotta go to McDonald's every day and get a Big Mac. I'm saying you need to get proteins, whether you get that from McDonald's or you get that from the grocery store, whether you get that from Chipotle. Well, you would know.

Um, like, I mean, that's— there's no— whoa, whoa, you're better than that.

I am better than that.

I'm sorry.

Raise your game.

Let's be better. Uh, the NBA playoffs have been pretty great. And pretty surprisingly great. If you look at the Eastern Conference, the worst series, air quotes, was New York-Atlanta. That went 6, and that one individually, that was still an interesting— and it was, it was an interesting series. There have been some surprises. I don't think anyone— like you were saying that you'd be surprised if LA won a game. Here they, here they are with the two big injuries. They're in the second round against OKC. OKC did what it was supposed to do. But Philadelphia over Boston, especially the way that we got there, shocking. A little disappointed that Denver's not in the next round because I wanted to see Jokic versus Wemby.

I'm not.

But I mean, that was an upset. And to do it with injuries to their superstar, which is weird because you can only— that's weird, right? You can only talk about injuries when it's Jayson Tatum and not Ant Edwards.

Yeah. Like, first of all, I want to start with Denver. No, they don't deserve— they don't deserve— you guys had a— you talk about they didn't have Anthony Edwards, they didn't have Dante DiVincenzo, they didn't have Io Tusumu. They literally had no guards. They had to turn to Terrence Shannon Jr. who hadn't played at all.

And like, good player though.

Well, Coach Finch is like, yeah, we figured out finally, like, it took us all year, but like, oh, just give it to him at the top and let him just keep going left, right? As opposed to standing in the corner. So like, Minnesota is literally doing what Joe Mazzulla did by choice, which is like, I've got to try something because I don't have anything else. Joe Mazzulla's like, I've got other things, but you know what, Luka Garza, I feel good about this one. So, but Denver, they, they did not respect the opponent, and when the opponent ratcheted it up like the intensity and desperation and that's what they played with early on.

That series turned when everyone started going neck first for these boards.

But it's— but like Minnesota, you know, we start with that whole the unwritten rule game, right? And it's like, yo, he doesn't respect you. What, what, what part of this are you guys— oh, how dis— oh, classless. What are you guys talking about? He's busting your ass. He's calling you guys bums before—

by name.

By name, right? So Denver did not come to me with the appropriate intensity to win that series regardless of whether Anthony Edwards gets hurt or not. But there was a bad series. And it's gonna shock you.

Thunder-Suns was bad.

No, no, it wasn't. It was entertaining. It was a sweep is what it was. It was a sweep, but no. I'm gonna tell you something. Detroit-Orlando was awful. I get it. It went 7, then they came back from 3-1, and there's drama in the macro. But if you're watching those basketball games, It's literally just throwing rocks at each other. It's like, ah, what's going on? I was like, well, I ran out of bricks, so this is all I got is more rocks. And then just throw it at each other. Yeah, that one was awful.

The arc of the series might be compelling to an NBA fan as a soap opera is compelling, but I don't think the individual games, very many of them this spring— and again, I go back to last season and the season before that— I don't think NBA playoff games are all that satisfying a watch. Especially in comparison to the Stanley Cup playoffs, which by the way, I'll say again, they really should have pulled the plug on once the Penguins lost in Game 6. It would have been better to just move on. But either way, the other thing that's crazy is that we continue to— we're so— we've been in it, the frogs boiling in the water, for 30 years now or whatever it is, almost literally since Michael Jordan leaves the Chicago Bulls. In '98. The Western Conference of the NBA is perpetually so much better than the Eastern Conference. It is wild. And the only thing that props it up is that it's Miami, it's New York City, it's Boston, and it's Philly that makes it relevant, that it's this rolling conversation, these East Coast metropolises. Otherwise, what are we even talking about? It's really like JV, like Who's going to get through the JV side because all the heavyweights are on the other?

And that's been the case for 30 years now. It's wild how this has persisted, right? We talk about, although, well, the AFC has all the good quarterbacks for the last 5 years. That's true. This has gone on for 30 years. What gives already?

You know what, Dave, I, I would love to agree with you except for the fact if we go back to this era parody that we've had since 2019, we're a different champion every year. 2019 It's the Toronto Raptors. That's an Eastern Conference team.

Mm-hmm.

2021, it's the Milwaukee Bucks. That's an Eastern Conference team, right? 2024, the Boston Celtics. That's an Eastern Conference team. And now this year, like, we all expect it to be Oklahoma City. But the reality is only one team gets to represent a conference. You don't get any kudos or extra pats on the back. Oh man, I had to play so-and-so in the first round. Nobody cares when you get to the finals. That's it. And the team that wins wins.

Whether that's true or not is a different discussion, but the reality is if you go back to the '80s, it flips. The Boston Celtics, the Bird-McHale chief and otherwise, had to run through some really rugged Milwaukee Bucks teams, and the Sixers were obviously always a tough rival, and Atlanta Hawks were good. On the other side of things, Kareem and Magic had to get through some— I mean, like Denver Nuggets who scored a lot, like some decent Sonics teams, some decent Mavs teams. It was so— the advantage that the Lakers had when they would get to the Finals to play the Celtics or otherwise was that they had some light lifting to do for the preceding 6 weeks, whereas the Celtics were running a gauntlet every year. So you could make a case that whoever survives this Eastern Conference is better set because they're, they're probably relatively fresh. They haven't been tested as much as whoever gets through this West.

Counterpoint: they still went to the Finals and lost to the Celtics, right? The, the, the Lakers that had that easy road. To me, it's funny that you, NFL guy, wants to come at me when the '90s, there was like 18 million years in a row where the AFC just got its ass waxed every single time in the Super Bowl.

I'm not coming at it, I'm just pointing out the, the reality.

They did get their ass waxed.

You know about that ass wax?

Mano wax.

I feel like you do.

Again, who's Tony pointing at there? Zazz.

Low, we're better than this.

We need to workshop some better Zazz riffs, man. Like, Tony, me and you, let's get over it.

No, I'm just saying, Zazz is relatively hairless, so I feel like he knows about that ass wax.

You're not making a point by talking about me.

That is not true at all, though. You park in your grandma's same garage? I have a very manly chest. Yeah, full of hair. That's right, prove it. Maybe I will, when you're least expecting it.

We've done this before, but let me see your belly button.

No, don't do it.

Yeah, don't do it.

Internet lives forever.

Dan Levitard.

Cheaters never prosper.

Stugatz. I ain't cheating.

This is the Dan Levitard Show with the Stugatz. So Saturday was a huge day outside of sports also, and it was not great for people who had flights booked on Spirit because all of a sudden Spirit decided, "We don't exist anymore." Can you imagine? You flew somewhere on Friday, you're gonna fly back on Sunday, and all of a sudden the airline, like, poof, like a fart in the wind. Doesn't exist anymore. It's gone.

RIP Spirit Airlines, man.

RIP Spirit Airlines.

Budget airlines going the way of the dodo.

$9 fare.

I know you—

I was a $9 fare member for a very long time. Fort Lauderdale to Connecticut when I lived up at ESPN up in Connecticut. That was the easy route back and forth. And I had a lot of— I did a lot of time in the Spirit Airlines pen.

Wait, ESPN was booking your travel?

No, I had to book it myself.

Oh, okay.

Via vis-à-vis poorly from a budgetary standpoint.

I don't think you do via vis-à-vis.

Sunshine after the rain.

It was vis-à-vis.

Yes.

But he was saying via, but I said I was doing it via.

I appreciate that Amin has just so easily moved on. He's like, all right, somebody stole my Aziz Ansari, stole my Kash Patel.

Aziz does it better. I mean, I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no. Amin does it better. Yeah, I don't say Aziz there, you say Amin there. Amin, yeah, yeah, no, Amin does his way better.

Much better. I saw that, much better.

You know what, I disagree. I thought Aziz did a really good job.

No, you're wrong.

He does it— his cadence is a lot better than mine.

The eyes, he needs to work on.

No, the eyes, I got him beat. If it was just silently step up to a podium, I got him beat. But the moment he had to do the voice, He's got me beat there.

Were you busy this weekend? Did they call you to do it?

You know what's funny?

They did reach out, and I was like, "Ugh, Game 7." You were like, "I actually think this should go to an Indian." It's like, we have a livestream planned if the Celtics lose.

I have dinner plans with Zazz and his wife. Early bird.

Tony, did you ever have— since you were a $9 fare club member for Spirit that all of a sudden does not exist anymore— did you ever have any bad experiences? I had—

but to be honest, look, I'm gonna be— I'm gonna have a moment of transparency here. Like, I had a lot more good experiences with Spirit than I did bad, and I guess maybe I was just the lucky one. But there was a lot of times where I would go to the, uh, like, this is also kind of me, I'd walk up to the, uh, the Spirit, you know, desk or whatever, right, right in front of the gate, avoiding the fistfights and stuff. Yeah, I just walked by. Whoa, whoa, my bad, come over. And then I'd be like, hey, look, $9 fare club member, I didn't see any big seats. If there are any big seats, which they only keep the first 2 rows of big seats. And I think if there are any big seats, if there's any way that I can move up, I would appreciate that. I've only got, you know, carry-on.

And they set you up sometimes.

Those are me up sometimes.

Those are always sold though.

I know, but those are just available.

Those go so quick sometimes. Sometimes they didn't do it, and sometimes they did.

Did anyone— customer base was just as unreliable as the airline?

Correct.

It was.

You had people who just wouldn't show up.

But those— that's the type of airline that you can sweet-talk your way. Exactly. A little bit more.

And it's like, just go be nice.

Why?

Because everybody else sucks.

Exactly.

Did everyone here have their turn flying Spirit at one point? Like, I guess the better way is, has anyone here never flown Spirit?

I did it once. I decided never again.

I mean, you flew Spirit?

I have flown Spirit before, and like Mike, I had the same reaction, like, I'm not doing this again. Well, what was—

what triggered that?

Well, it was just— it was a bunch of things. Number one, like, I, I'm sure a lot of people did this. I fell for the fare, like, oh my God, this is an incredible fare. It wasn't $9, but it was like— it was like, it was a Good fare. I'm like, oh, great. And so then they were like, oh, you got a carry-on bag? I'm like, well, yeah. Like, well, that's gonna cost you. I'm like, okay. Then I put the carry— they do the little measurement thing, and it was like, they're strict on that. The handle was like popping out. Oh, nope, nope, that's out. So now you got to pay. So now I have to pay again to have it checked in. And then it was like, okay, well, we'll get on this plane. Let me get it. I get a drink, that's gonna cost. Like, so it was by the time everything added up, more expensive. Also, like, I didn't want a middle seat, so I had to pay extra for that. Like By the time it all added up, I'm like, I could have just paid the same fare and flown American and not have to deal with any of this stuff.

I did it against my will. I was dragged onto the plane by a friend that booked— let's all be on the same flight.

Was he like pulling you by your legs?

Yeah, he was like, I got this flight, it's a great fare. We were flying to Atlanta. There were so many better options out there. And the flight was delayed like 4 hours. I sat on a wood plank. It was just terrible.

That's what I'll always remember is just like sitting on a skeleton of a seat.

I said never again. Again, and I kept my word. Never again.

Dave, you ever flew Spirit?

I did once, and you know that the commercial that you see a fair amount of the time these days for the shingles shot, like, you gotta get it, like, you don't, like, you don't want to get the shingles. I might otherwise just ignore that commercial, but I had the Spirit Air experience. A lot of people said, don't, whatever, whatever happens, don't ever put yourself on a Spirit Air flight. And I was like, ah, How bad could it be? Then I took one. Long story short, I've gotten my shingle shots.

So to be serious and fair, this is awful news for several reasons. Number one, there are people who it's like, yo, even with all the extra fares that I— extra fees I mentioned, this is still the most cost-effective way to travel for them. And so it cuts out a low-cost option for travelers. But then number two, This whole thing, shitstorm of air travel, started when they deregulated the airlines, right? And said, hey, let the free market just dictate the prices. What we're seeing is a lot of consolidation. Now the United and American are talking about merging, and what happens is you've got a few big players that run the whole industry. Guess what they do? They jack up those prices, so the fares are gonna get worse for everybody as a result of one less low-cost carrier.

And quality goes down, which is why you don't want all the power going just to a handful of corporations across the board, and In the United States, airline travel, if you look back to the seats like in the '90s, it has gotten progressively worse.

Oh, every seat had massive cushions when I was a kid flying.

And we are just so beaten down by an industry that treats us poorly, spies on our internet habits, and jacks up the prices based on our search. It's insane that you can be on a page for 5 seconds, talk to your family, be like, "Let's book this," and you get back, and because you didn't purge your cookies or whatever, The flight's $200 more.

That happened to me a couple months ago, I told you about that. It's insane.

There are two industries in this country that need absolute reform. It's the ticketing industry and it's the airline industry. We should have never bailed them out. They should have been left to die. And we should all raise up, bipartisan, and say this is not good enough. This is bullshit.

Can we start that here?

Why not? We should be able to take it.

We're doing it right now.

We should be able to take it.

We are doing it right now.

Friends, countrymen, lend me your ears. Let's fight against the tyranny of oppressive monopolistic actions by Live Nation and American Airlines and Delta and United, I guess.

It's an exercise in pain tolerance if you're a taller individual. You have to get lucky with who's sitting next to you. You have to get lucky. Oh, I want a window seat, but not the window seat that has it come out. The window has to be— yeah, I need that little indentation because I got to avoid the guy that's leaning on me in the middle seat. This is bogus. And how do you not have enough space in the overhead cabins? Did you not expect people to bring bags? Am I supposed to travel to the West Coast without a bag?

They do it on purpose, Mike, because they want you to check your bags in for exorbitant prices. These people are leeches, and we need to purge the people who are— you know what we need to do? We need to have a reinvestment into fast high-speed rail in this country. That's right. Brightline, you're not just a murder train, you are a vision of the future.

They're also on life support, by the way.

They're also like, uh, they're gonna go bankrupt.

I mean, go to any developed country and the rail system is so much better. Like, that's how you make things a little bit more competitive. But this is where this apolitical effort stops, because at least the previous administration took strides to actually curtail some of these predatory practices from the airline industry and held them accountable if they were doing the thing.

Get your hand out of my effing face. What are you talking about, Mike? Of course, everything— listen, this is all Biden, Obama's fault, and let's just move on.

All right, in all those other countries they have high-speed rail. Here we get railed. Wow, I only got one yeah. Come on, guys, let's start a revolution. I can't even start it in this studio.

I did one of these fist pumps, but that wasn't over the air.

It's an audio medium.

I gave a smile.

Again, an audio medium.

Nobody— no one's okay with this. Like, it's just like, all right, I'm gonna travel, it's gonna be bad, and that's just the way that it goes, and it's gonna be more expensive each time I do it, and I'm gonna be less comfortable every time I do it, and I pray to God there isn't a delay, and they're gonna treat me bad, and that's just how it is because there's no getting better because that's the way this industry goes. It just gets worse. I don't get it. I don't understand it.

Over there, their seats recline. Here, we're in decline!

Welcome to the resistance, gentlemen. Wanna get away? Ironic or not, you know, Woody Allen's movie Crimes and Misdemeanors, a real gem of a picture, and the message is that, you know, all sins are not punished. And I think that's the lesson of the last decade, right, Mike Ryan? I mean, the last decade is that you can commit a crime, and if you feel like, you know, the ominous telltale heart in the floor otherwise is coming to get you, like Oh, turns out, yeah, people shake their fists and tsk tsk about it, but nobody ever actually gets in the way of doing it if you're rich and powerful.

I have to be completely honest with you, stop listening at Woody Allen.

Over there, they have room in the overhead. Over here, they charge us for their overhead.

When we talk about over there, where are we talking about exactly? Because I've flown over there and it's not great over there.

Have you taken the rail over there?

The rail—

what we're talking about— public transportation is great. It's a great thing.

Where?

And it's where?

Over there.

Over there.

Over there.

But over there is much smaller than over here.

Over here we've got this much land size.

Over there they got this much land size. That's always the excuse. But it's not the excuse, it's the reality. I mean, look at over there. It can be China and look at their rail system. They got a lot of land to cover over there too.

Yeah, they own all of it.

What? We don't own the United States? What are we doing? This is not—

oh my God, it's gotten worse.

This is— look, this sucks. Travel in this country sucks. You want more options. They all get together and limit your options. They give all the power to like 3 companies. Quality goes down, prices go up, and you just take it up your ass.

And we all know who they are, am I right? Over there they got first class. Over here we're taking it up the ass.

Ah, turning it on a little bit, Amin.

Good for you.

I probably took Spirit like a half dozen times. I flew it a handful of times. I'll never forget telling my boys a couple years ago, we were flying— I said, so I go, you won't believe the price I got, it's $49 a ticket. They thought we were sitting like on the wing. They had— they couldn't believe it.

Over there they serve you spirits, over here they take away our spirit.

Ah, all right, not as good as the last one, but still stay on target. Stay on target, stay on target. Good t-shirt.

Very sad day.

Mike Ryan, does it bother you at all Or maybe I'm wrong about this. Does it get in the way, your hatred of Boston, that they probably are like Don Draper in the elevator with the other guy? Like, I don't think about you at all. I don't—

or I don't— I have precious little evidence of that. I think—

you think Boston—

I think Miami is on Boston's mind all the time.

Do you really?

Yeah.

I'm not asking that to get your goat. Yeah. I think if you—

did you not watch what happened when the Heat were kicking the tires on Damian Lillard?

Okay.

I mean, it was—

he was—

it was an apocalypse. It was an—

they came out in full force to make sure it didn't happen.

You know what I did?

Every Boston media member—

the thing that all the Miami media members did when Notre Dame was in the playoffs, like, this was an actual thing that was, you know, wrong to go through the Bill Simmons, like, prism.

He doesn't hate on many teams more than the Heat. Bill Simmons once a year gets scared of the Heat, even when they're not good. There's always a moment in Boston— Boston hates Philly and New York City more than it does Miami.

Yeah, but they don't get to be racist against those towns. Yeah. The way that they get to be racist with Miami.

That's right. It's like the scene in Pretty Woman where Jason Alexander, who you might know as George Costanza, shows up and he tries a proposition of what's her name.

Is that your Kash Patel?

No, this is my nasally Bill Simmons.

Is that your Aziz?

Pretty good.

I saw the picture of Aziz over the weekend. I'm like, Amin does it better.

He does the voice better.

Tell me you turned it down.

Yeah, if you put it on mute, shit, I got that guy.

No, no, no, I mean you had to have turned the job down.

Oh no, yeah, I mean look. They offered and I said, this should really go to an Indian role.

The other night I was staying in. At least that was the plan. Then the text from my buddy Eagle Eye comes in. Mike, we've got the games on. I say, yeah. I grab a pack of Miller Lite and immediately my plan's gone. Now it's playoff basketball. Every possession feels huge. Baseball's on another screen and I somehow care about that too. Everybody's got takes flying. Nobody's watching just one thing. And we're all way more into it than we ever expected. It was one of those nights that you take a sip, you look around, and you think, yeah, this was the right move. That's why I reach for Miller Lite. It's clean, refreshing, easy to drink, brewed for taste with simple ingredients. Just 96 calories and 3.2 carbs. The original light beer since 1975, and it still hits different. Cheers to legendary moments with Miller Lite. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to MillerLite.com/Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.