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Transcriptions of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer podcast

19 episodes 24K views

Transcript of Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Head to http://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today! Visit https://bluechew.com with promo code BEARS to receive your first month FREE. Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Head to https://NetSuite.com/BEARS to download the CFO’s Guide to AI and Machine Learning guide. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears. Alright, alright, alright, welcome back to 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are joined by the coolest dude in Austin, Matthew McConaughey! Matt's re-releasing his book, "Greenlights" and visits the cave to talk all about it. It's a book that feels just like you're sitting down hanging out with McConaughey himself. The bears dive deep into Matt's personal philosophies and make a hands-on discovery about how seamless it is for him to be cool. The trio also talk about their personal alcohol brands, McConaughey's early film roles, that thing he does in "The Wolf of Wall Street", Tom's first time meeting him years ago, the cult status of "Tiptoes", and the almighty condiment ketchup. They also talk about biggest dammits, ballsy moves, their dads, friendships, Joey Diaz, the McConaissance, and the bears also learn a bunch of food hacks from the mind of McConaughey. So check out this episode....be a lot cooler if you did! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 262 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:36:18
  • 1.8K views
  • Published about 1 year ago

Transcript of Trippin' Balls On A Plane w/ Russell Peters | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour SPONSORS: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/BEARS and get 10% off your first month. Tune in to the NASCAR Cup Series Championship race on Sunday, November 10th at 3:00 PM Eastern on NBC, check the schedule over at https://www.nascar.com/nascar-cup-series/2024/schedule/?cid=_SC_TP_WL_2B1CAMS_230202 Try VIIA! https://bit.ly/viiaymh and use code YMH! Go to https://Babbel.com/BEARS and get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription. Once again, it's 2 Bears, 1 Cave this time with Tommy Bunz taking a turn in the cave with a guest bear! This week Tom is joined by comedian Russell Peters, who may or may not have a thing for Tom's mom Charo. The two have a lively discussion about hip-hop and Big Daddy Kane, whom Russell knows personally. They also talk about places they don't like to travel to, crazy international flights, older porn stars, doing a special in Abu Dhabi, being a super dad, and the worst place to be tripping on something. They also share their thoughts on cold plunges, their moms, and Tom shares some info about his upcoming series on Netflix. Check it out! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 261 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:11:33
  • 430 views
  • Published about 1 year ago

Transcript of Bussin' With The Bears w/ Will Compton | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Get 5 dollars off your next order of delicious cereal at MagicSpoon.com/BEARS. Or look for Magic Spoon in your nearest grocery aisle. Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Tune-in to the NASCAR Cup Series race on Sunday, June 30th at 3:30 PM Eastern on NBC! We're back with another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Tom and Bert are joined by Will Compton, former NFL linebacker and one half of Bussin' With The Boys! Will chats with the bears about raising a family while committing to professional football, how receiving compliments from black folks hit differently, the power of saying No, and the philosophy of stoicism. They even have author Ryan Holiday jump into the show via phone to cover all things stoic. They also talk about how Tom's growing, the importance of always staying busy, and more! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 242 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:09:27
  • 670 views
  • Published over 1 year ago

Transcript of Strip Club Stories w/ "Dr. Phil" | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Be sure to visit https://drphillive.tv/ tonight at 9:30pm CDT for a livestream of Dr. Phil Live! SPONSORS: Brought to you by BetterHelp, visit https://BetterHelpcom/BEARS today to get 10% off your first month. Head to https://Babbel.com/BEARS get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription for a limited time. Download the Gametime app, create an account, and use code BEARS for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). Download the new DraftKings Pick Six app NOW and use code BEARS. Alright, we'll keep it here....Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Tom and Bert are looking to grow and heal and have some help in the form of the one and only "Dr. Phil" (Adam Ray)! Tom and Bert start off by getting the good doctor a stiff drink, before they debate soft drinks and famous Jasons. They deep dive into Brad Pitt lore and discuss the old saying "age is just a number". "Dr. Phil" surprises the bears with some fun facts and people with funny sounding names. They also play a couple of bonding games "Dr. Phil" has come up with and share some wild stories they've experienced at gentlemen clubs. Other topics covered in this one include Alex Trebek, little people, favorite comedians, and running bits. We'll be right back! https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 235 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:24:59
  • 1.8K views
  • Published over 1 year ago

Transcript of World's Smallest D***s | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: -Get 10% off your order at https://thefreezepipe.com with promo code BEARS -Visit http://Lucy.co/BEARS and use promo code (BEARS) to get 20% off your first order. -This show is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit https://betterhelp.com/bears today to get 10% off your first month. -Get 50% off your order at https://factormeals.com/BEARS50 with promo code BEARS50 Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! Bert's back in the Cave this week and he and Tom discuss aging and lower members. Specifically which nationality ages the best and which nation has the smallest average peener size. Two completely different debates for two completely intriguing topics. Speaking of words you can't say without getting flagged online, Bert and Tom also talk about how confusing the content policies are for social media sites and how sometimes it's difficult to tell what's appropriate and what's not. It's not all fun and games this week as Tom and Bert also get a little sentimental and talk about feeling shame for the first time, the heavy weight of people pleasing all the time, and being cynical about people finding fulfillment in silly things. Other things covered in this episode include, ladyboys, Bert's favorite Austrian painter, Queen Elizabeth, the origin of drinking ages, and Shannon Doherty. Tune in and learn something! https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 225 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:07:06
  • 2.2K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of AI Is Taking Over The World w/ Duncan Trussell | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Go to https://Saatva.com/theshit to get $200 off ANY mattress of your choice. Head to https://Manscaped.com and use code: BEARS to get 20% plus free shipping. Tune in to the NASCAR Cup Series race on Sunday, February 25th at 3:00 PM ET on FOX! Check out the schedule here: https://www.nascar.com/nascar-cup-series/2024/schedule/?cid=_SC_TP_WL_2B1CAMS_230202 Go to http://liquiddeath.com/BEARS to check out all their healthy, infinitely recyclable beverages and find your closest retailer. Bert's locked up so this week comedian Duncan Trussell joins Tom Segura on 2 Bears, 1 Cave! Duncan knows a thing or two about doing time and he shares these surprisingly fun experiences with Tom. This leads to Duncan and Tom discussing the ethics and dietary concerns when it comes to eating your friends and neighbors. But Humans aren't only a food source they're also a source of labor and comedy, two things that are at risk of being replicated by robots and AI, a discourse that Duncan has plenty of thoughts on. Other topics brought up include deviant monks, rituals, genital fillers, glass eyes, Japan, NPC's, the James Webb Telescope, sociopaths , war hero grandpas, goofballs, secret handshakes, and much more! https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 224 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:22:40
  • 2K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of Our Big Announcement | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Go to https://Shopify.com/bears to get a one-dollar-per-month trial period. Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Head to https://NetSuite.com/BEARS to get your own KPI Checklist. Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave. This week, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer have created their own vodka! They discuss their brand new vodka Por Osos and share the process from distilling to bottling to drinking. The Bears also taste test some samples of the stuff, before brainstorming marketing moves and which celebrities they should recruit to be brand ambassadors. Burnt and Tim also talk about the upcoming Super Bowl, mixed drinks, sushi addictions, nicotine needs, Taylor Swift, famous Russians, la Raza, training horses, an update on the 2 Bears 5k, plus Donna Kelce tries to FaceTime Bert, and we get a reveal of what the Por Osos bottle looks like! Take a drink and earn your Monday. https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com/ 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 222 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:10:17
  • 1.4K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of Does Katt Williams Hate Us? | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Head to https://Manscaped.com and use code: BEARS to get 20% off with free shipping. Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Welcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Tom shares his experiences from a recent trip to Japan, the delicious cuisine there, and Bert tries his best not to interrupt. The bears also discuss accents, addicts, geishas, the Grateful Dead, George R.R. Martin, meeting famous people, El Paso, the Golden Globes, 5K by May, and much more! https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 221 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:05:35
  • 1.2K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of F1 Is Wild w/ Ryan Sickler | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://myaccount.draftkings.com/signup?intendedSiteExp=US-SB or through my promo code BEARS Go to https://Babbel.com/BEARS to get 55% off your Babbel subscription. Go to https://LIQUID-IV.com and use code: CAVE to get 20% off your first order. This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura is joined by guest bear Ryan Sickler! They discuss Ryan's recent health scare, Tom's old basketball injury, living forever, and The Way Back, Sickler's brand-new nostalgia podcast. Tom also tells Ryan some F1 stories, Ryan shares a story about an alleged bomber who climbed up a ferris wheel on a pier, plus the bears talk famous villains from history like Whitey Bulger, new sleeping tips, and the dangers of the gold mining industry in Latin America. Try it out! https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com/ 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 219 GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (AZ/CO/IA/IL/IN/KS/KY/LA/MD/ME/MI/NJ/OH/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY), (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. Call 1-800-522-4700 (NH), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT), or visit http://www.1800gambler.net (WV). 21+ (18+ KY/NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/KS/KY/LA(select parishes)/MA/MD/ME/MI/NJ/NY/OH/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). Bet $5 Get $200: Valid 1 per new customer. Min. $5 deposit. Min. $5 bet. $200 issued in bonus bets. Void in NH/OR. No Sweat: Opt in req. 1 No Sweat token issued per day. SGP/SGPx bets only. 3+ legs req. Max. wagering limits apply. Must use funds from cash balance. Must select token BEFORE placing bet. Bet must lose after applying Token. Paid as one Bonus Bet based on amount of losing bet. Tokens expire at start of the last game each day when offered. No Sweat cannot be used to redeem Bet $5 Get $200 offer. Rewarded bonus bets expire 7 days (168 hours) after being awarded. Bonus bets must be wagered 1x and stake is not included in winnings. Ends 01/28/24 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. See terms at http://dkng.co/ftball . Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • 01:19:01
  • 1.2K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of Stavros Halkias | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 215

Tickets are available now for YMH's new special event, 69 Minutes! Get your tickets at https://69minutes.ymhstudios.comA second show date has been added at the MGM Grand Garden Arena on Friday, February 9th at 9pm. Pre-sale tickets are live NOW, use the code: BEARS to experience both Tom and Bert on stage! Get your tickets at https://tomsegura.com/tour or https://www.bertbertbert.com/tourThis week on 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom is joined by comedian Stavros Halkias who's here to make the bear cave fat again! They talk about Greece, mafia movies, fat guy math, doing comedy specials in Austin and foreign family members. Tom shares some discoveries about his family history and the duo bond over their appreciation of steaks and dogs, before searching for a new Religious wife for Stavros!https://store.ymhstudios.com/

  • 01:22:18
  • 1.4K views
  • Published almost 2 years ago

Transcript of 2 Bears vs 2 Kelces | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 214

Tickets for Jon Stewart & Tom Segura are available now! This December 12th and 13th at the Wellmont Theater in Montclair, NJ. Get them now by going to  https://tomsegura.com/tourWelcome back to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week Tom and Bert throw down a challenge gauntlet for fellow podcasters and football players Jason and Travis Kelce! The Bears discuss the type of competition they'd issue to the Kelce brothers and draw lines in the sand between the different communities that would be in their corners. They talk Taylor Swift, the influence of Swifties and the BeyHive, relatable athletes, top 5 female music artists of all time, and even get a call from Pat McAfee!https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://www.bertbertbert.com/tourhttps://store.ymhstudios.com/

  • 01:08:27
  • 1.2K views
  • Published about 2 years ago

Transcript of The Crazy World of Steve-O | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 211

Welcome to another episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave. This week, Bert Kreischer is joined by guest bear Steve-O. They discuss Steve-O’s new special, the start of his entertainment career, his Jackass co-stars, his time in rehab, what it means to be happy, and much more. They also talk on the phone to Mike “Cowhead” Calta, and Dr. Drew Pinsky.https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://www.bertbertbert.com/tourhttps://store.ymhstudios.com/

  • 01:23:33
  • 1.3K views
  • Published about 2 years ago
Description of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Weekly, comedian best friends Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer get together in the bear cave at YMH Studios to do what bears do: make each other laugh.