Transcript of The Top 5 Dumb Unwritten Rules In Sports | Postgame Show New

In 3, 2, 3.

No, leave that in.

What was that noise?

Jesus.

I guess that's on me. I put him up too early.

Ted Williams gonna be stunned to realize the Red Sox have won several World Series.

Oh yeah, loser. Yeah, it's funny, just found out he died in 2002, so I don't have to explain 9/11 to him. I think you still might have to explain the internet. I know the internet was around and everything, but I still think—

Al Gore's internet? Which, by the way, interesting that we call it an Al Gore rhythm, huh?

Never thought of it that way. I'll never think of it that way again. Juju, good to see you. Juju, I know you got a top 5 for us, right?

Wait, wait, wait, Juju, are you wearing a Stephon Marbury Timberwolves jersey?

You feel me? 'Tis the season.

Wow.

It's really representing. It's Stephon Marbury, but he got the same number as my brother. Jaden McDaniels. So you already know what time it is, man. Salute to the good guys.

All right, I'm so old, man. I was like, is that Stephon Marbury?

Shut up. Look at Stephon Marbury.

Juju, you got a top 5 to get us going here? What do you got for us, bro?

I got 2 top 5s for you, you feel me? So I'm gonna go through them a little fast. The first one, because Joker, brother, lame as hell. You can get the Joker of the Day for real, for real, real quick. Nikola Jokic, you sir are the Joker of the Day.

I didn't know what he said.

You calling him brother, or you saying Jokic's brother is lame as hell? Because that could be too—

put them all in there, put them all in the box, shake them up, and put them up to Michael Jordan's rings. You did 6 to 1. But yes, sir. Also Scott Foster for that BS call out of bounds on OG Anunoby whenever—

the wrong foot. You see this? Yeah, he's looking at the wrong foot.

Yeah, exactly. But yeah, top 5 lamest unwritten rules, bro. Okay, number 5: don't plant your flag on my field after after y'all beat us.

It's a very college football thing, right? Exactly.

Ain't nothing— now one of y'all— this ain't y'all feelin' either. So this, this, this that big brother upstairs feel why you care so much. Number 4, toss back the other team home run if I catch it. What do you mean? I've been waiting for this moment all my life. I finally caught one. Who cares if it's young? Throw it back!

No, no, they bring fake—

they bring fake balls into the ballpark and they throw that onto the field and they keep the home run ball.

That is true. They do that.

That's an insane move. Like, whole— like bringing a baseball for like 7 years every game just in case.

That's nuts.

I didn't know that.

Roy's right.

I'll be damned if I go to the baseball field with a pocket full of baseballs. Just need one.

No, what if you catch 2, Roy?

Well, then you give it to a kid.

And what does he do?

He, he's—

then he can throw it back.

Like, he got to throw back his, his fake ball.

In the words of Michael Jordan, F them kids. No, they go, don't bunt to break up my no-hitter.

Oh yeah, yes, yes, yes.

It's such a good list from Juju right here.

I'm so sorry, uh, you got a good thing going on right now. How about this? You better stop it.

This one made me viscerally react.

Baseball purist Jeremy, you have a problem with that?

Ah, this one I don't like.

It hit me.

It just did just get a hit.

It depends on how deep into the game you are, right?

Like, the game is close. It's okay if it's a 7-run lead. You're a dickhead if you do.

Yeah, I think it's like if we're talking about it's the, it's the 7th inning, I think after the first 2/3 of the game, I have an issue with it.

Even if it's—

that's why I'm nothing.

I'm with Zazz on this.

No, if it's a 1-0 game, we're having a separate conversation. But also, if it's a perfect game versus a no-hitter, we're also having a different conversation.

It's a 1-0 perfect game. You wouldn't bunt? Brother, we're trying to win the game.

You're wrong. They're trying to win the game.

What do you play to do, Jeremy?

I'd be mad.

Not—

well, yeah, you should be. This is like, this is like the Nuggets announcers, like, yeah, he doesn't respect you.

Oh God, I'd be so— oh, I'd be so—

you're trying to win the game still. It's okay.

I get it.

I get it. And I'm sure the pitcher, like, himself would be okay with it ultimately. But as a fan, if I was watching my favorite pitcher throw a perfect game and in two outs in the seventh inning and nobody on and a guy goes to lay down a bunt for a base hit and that's what breaks it up, I'd lose my mind.

Isn't one of the things that says that you're not supposed to mention a no-hitter when it's happening?

Correct. Maybe Juju's got that.

Don't steal it.

I don't have that one.

Okay, all right, cool.

So do the other team, can they say he's got a no-no going?

Oh yeah, I would do that all the time.

Yeah, 100%.

Oh my God, I wonder if he's gonna finish that no-no.

Yeah, you do that for sure.

Don't mess up his no-no.

I do that as a fan. If my team is being no-hit in like the 5th inning, I'm like, hey, you go, he's got a no-hitter.

Hey, you got to talk to— you got to talk to the teammates because then they'll mess up. They'll be in their head.

I'll bet the other team's announcers do it.

Oh, 100%.

Yeah, announcer.

Yeah, I'll bet they do.

I think once they're through 4, again, it depends because it's like I'd yell it first inning. He's got a no-no going.

I would.

I'd do it after the first at-bat.

Let's hear what you got next, Juju.

Look, I don't give a damn if it's the bottom of the 9th and we down 20. I'm bunting on your ass.

Damn your perfect game.

That's a brawl. Let's fight. Number 2 though, in this same vein, just because you deem something happened that you don't like, you get to hit me with a 99-mile-an-hour fastball?

What?

Nuh-uh, sir.

Unwritten rule.

Nah, bro, don't get me back another way. Don't hit me with the ball, bro. Get me back after the game.

That's assault, man.

Exactly, that's assault, brother.

I actually agree with you.

Number 1. And the number one, man, don't score on me if you up and but your team has the ball at the end. Whatever Nikola Jokic did the other day to Jayden McDaniels, I don't give a damn. Like Jayden McDaniels say, man, stop me then. You don't like it, stop me then, man, because I don't like you. How about that? And guess what? You're lame, bruh. Joker, you are the— he ran all the way down there just to not want no smoke.

No, he ran all the way down there again to, to get punked again by Jaden McDaniels.

Exactly.

Run it, run the clip one more time because you'll see he gets hemmed up and he— and it's nobody around, it's just them. And he's like, oh man, this is right here.

Uh-oh.

But then when Rudy gets there, now all of a sudden I'm aggressive again.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Poor Rudy, man.

And Jaden was laughing in his face.

Why is— why is Rudy always about to fall down? Terrible balance.

So with that said then, Juju, uh, I know you got another top 5 for us.

Absolutely, man. I got a top 5 list of people who didn't want no smoke. Number 5, the ref who Dan Hurley headbutted. That brother ain't want no smoke. He could have gave that man a technical foul. The game wasn't over.

Yeah.

He was like, you got it, bro. That was awesome. Number 4, the one— the LeBron that one time when Beef Stew was on his ass.

Oh man, when he's bleeding, he's running, running across the court, bro.

You the king. Salute. You the king, bro. But that was a crazy situation. I don't know if I would have wanted any of that either, brother.

No, sir.

Number 3, Geno Auriemma after the game against South Carolina. He refuted a lot after the game. He refuted everything. He refuted this, he refuted that, but he did not refute that Don Staley said he would whoop his ass. Number 2, Nikola Jokic, the other day, he ain't want no smoke. We already went through it. And the number 1 guy who didn't want no smoke, the guy who walked out of the boxing ring as soon as it was like the bell rung for first round.

I like that guy. And he walked back that long way. I like that guy.

That's one of the funniest things I ever saw, man. Greg, do you know this?

No, it's a box.

It's a box. This is a few years back, but like they do the intros, the guys are all right, and then ding ding ding, and the one guy just says, you know what, never mind. And he—

what?

Get out of the ring and just walks. Like that's it. It's that long walkway through the crowd, and it just kind of like— his head slumped, just walks out like Charlie Brown. Exactly, man.

He get like paid once the bell rings or something?

Like, was that a thing? I feel like it's quite possible he didn't get paid.

I mean, how are you— how are you sending that?

I'm just wondering, maybe that's where if the bell rings you technically get paid.

I don't know. Look, let me say this. If he did get paid, then my career as a professional boxer has begun. Just to show up and then actually get hit, I'll get paid to do that.

Juju, let's give us the polls. What do we got today for polls?

Yes, sir. While I pull the polls up, I want to give out a couple awards right quick. That's the The, uh, joke that deserved more laughs: Greg Cody, push it good. Oh my goodness.

Yeah, that was a good one. All right, that was a good one. Salt and pepper. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

How about all of us? How about all of us, including Juju, for showing up to work today?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This crew had never worked together before.

Never, never, never had.

Never.

Chemicals.

The Zazz Is Right Award goes to Zazz, man, about the Celtics, bro. I'm a Celtics fan.

I'm—

I don't like watching this, man. Fadeaway 3 after fadeaway 3. You didn't like it?

You didn't applaud that?

You don't have to applaud for yourself, you let others give it to you.

There you go, right? Also, a Joke of the Day award goes to Amina Hassan on the nonchalance Cleveland Cavaliers situation.

Yeah, I know you said joke girl of the day, I said what'd I do?

No, it's a great joke.

And last award, uh, the Cedric Entertainer Impression of the Day award also goes to Amina.

Very good, very good.

Well, I gotta tell you, Juju, nominee.

Yeah.

Here you go, the polls, man. Does everyone know that the red button is the panic button? 96% of the audience says yes, they do.

Yeah, I was more disputing just what you refer it to. Like, if we say, what do you call it, the red button or the panic button, I think I would have won that.

But red button, play on. Do people still carry pocketbooks? Hmm, 57% of the audience says no, they don't.

Oh, the jacket.

Is Who Made It a Salad the breakout star? Who Made It a Salad? 80% of the audience says yes, it is.

Wow.

Who Made It a Salad t-shirts available right now on levitaraf.com. Support us. $15 too. It ain't $35, $40. They on sale for $15 right now, guys. Very good deal. Exactly. Very good. Matter of fact, And the last poll: does Jeremy look like he knows about that get back? 63% of the audience says no, and those are your polls.

Vindicated!

Good job, Juju.

Thank y'all.