Transcript of RIP Jared's dignity

If you were to slide into my DM's, what would you say? Sweet. Number six, I know you're brought out of the crowd. I know you're up here, and people are. It's intimidating. Listen, you be you, and we'll be here for you. Let's hear it, number six.

Okay. Um, she's just.

Like, big old sloppy blow. Probably.

Just start out with, hey, how are you doing?

Not good.

That's what I usually do on dating apps. I just do a, hey, smiley face.

That works. It usually works. If I see that smiley face, I'm like, I'd love to talk to a woman who's happy. So you nailed it? Kinda. Besides that, it was drier than any woman Jared's been with. Jared.