Transcript of This Is What Freedom Sounds Like!

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual Real amazing relationships. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, Dr. John Deloney, number one best-selling author and host of the Dr. John Deloney Show, is my co-host today. We're taking your calls at 888-825-5225. The call is free, and some say the advice is worth exactly what you pay for it. Don't believe me, read it. There we go. Good to be back on the microphone. If those of you that don't care or didn't know, I've been gone for about four weeks, goofing off because I'm 64 years old. Why wouldn't I? Went to Turkey on a two-week Bible study of the seven churches of Revelation, and then changed the... Completely flipped it over, flew to Edinburgh and played golf for two weeks in Scotland with my wife on All of that. We've had a blast, and we're glad to be back home. We love to Turkey. The people of Turkey are wonderful. We love Scottish people. We've always loved Scotland. A lot of fun, but we really love America, and it's good to be home, America.

I Every time I travel, I do meet nice people. I don't have trouble finding good people in any country. There's very few countries I just despise, John.

Yeah, there's just-When you get out, there's good people. Get off the screen, there's good people everywhere.

Yeah, it was great. I enjoyed the Scottish. It was a lot of fun and had some great discussions with those guys. They're a lot of fun. The O'Katties are great. Oh, I bet. Certainly, all the Bible stuff we did in Turkey was off the chain. But it was really good to be back with you guys. Phone number 888-825-5225. Susan's in Kansas City. Hi, Susan. How can we help?

I am looking for wonderful advice as a way that I can help out my husband. He worked in pharmaceutical chemistry with a bachelor's and a PhD, worked for 15 years, got laid off in 2011, and he's never gotten a job since. It's been really challenging. When he was laid off, big time. His layoff It coincided with Obamacare being launched and pushed to get all sorts of pharmaceuticals down to generic price, so it made research really hard to be profitable in the US. Of course, the financial crisis had started in 2008, so there were thousands of chemists of his caliber looking for jobs. He looked all over the United States. We were willing to move. We had followed his career previously. I had been a stay-at-home parent, but when he was two years Out of having a job, I went back in and I got a full-time job and rebuilt my career, which has been really helpful, but it hasn't replaced his earnings because my bachelor's degree earnings do not equal PhD earnings in chemistry.

Apparently, they do.

Yeah, they do. They far exceeded.

Well, I guess in that case, yes, you're right. What I want to do is figure out how I can help him out. I've helped him to seek counseling when he was really down and having depression after being laid off, helped him seek medical help. We've even moved half halfway across the country from the East Coast back to the Midwest so we can be closer to family and have a lower cost of living. But I don't think that he is actively seeking different ways to look for jobs. We have enlisted a resume service way back 10 years ago, and he signed up for some online job seminars, and that was right at the beginning of 2020.

Hey, Susan.

It was all about networking. Hey, Susan.

I was going to interrupt you. This has nothing to do with the mechanics of finding a job. Okay. He doesn't want to work.

It's really hard. I do accept that concept.

I know.

I hear from him that he does, but I don't see him taking the steps.

But behavior is a language. His behavior is a language. What's he been telling you for a decade?

His behavior for a decade is, I don't work. I don't work. That's the answer to John's question.

His behavior for a decade is, I know that you're scared, and I know you're exhausted, and you're freaked out about bills. You go do something about it. I'm not going to. Here's why I don't have a lot of compassion. I know too many people of my personal friends who have PhDs who got laid off, and they are at the grocery store or they're at Walmart throwing boxes in the interim because they have families and they have commitments that they've made. They have responsibilities. Absolutely. I also have friends who've been in the throes of depression and have worked like you wouldn't believe to work themselves out. In six months, one year later, they're doing something.

I've encouraged him to take any an entry-level basic job just to get back into working. That's right. He's not been actively doing that. I did. That's how I got into my job. Now I've got- Well, Susan, that's what normal people do.

When you're broke and you don't have work and you can't find work in your field, you take a job. Then you keep on working your way back into your field, maybe. But you take a job. There's no excuses or reason that goes for 13 years unless he's mentally disabled or physically disabled. Even then, I think he could probably have been doing something.

I agree.

I'm not sure what I can do. I don't know that you can do anything. You can't. You've done a lot already. The only thing I would… My friend Henry Cloud tells a story about a guy who tried to help his son get through college, and he kept getting thrown out because he was smoking weed or whatever. The guy get him back into another college, he get thrown out, get him back into another college and get thrown out. The guy said to Henry, he goes, I got to tell you about my son's problems. He goes, Your son doesn't have any problems. His dad takes care of everything, and he smokes weed. Your son doesn't have any trouble. He goes, You're the one that's got problems. You have a son that's misbehaving, and my job is to help you help your son have some problems. Because your son is being taken care of by his trust fund daddy. In a sense, Susan, I know you're a kind, sweet person. I can hear it in your voice and the way you've described this. I want somehow someone in your husband's life to help him have some problems that gets him off his butt.

We have a blessing and a curse for his parents who have both passed away during this whole thing. They left him money and they were helping support us during the earlier parts of his unemployment. So he doesn't see a need to get something or we're going to be on the street living in a box.

Here's the problem, and I'll say what John's getting to say ahead of him because I know what he's going to say. You're losing respect for your husband.

Yes.

And it's going to cost you your marriage. It could. And he needs to know that. He doesn't believe that, and he doesn't know that.

Yeah, this isn't about resumes.

This is not about- No, this is about getting up off your butt.

What mom left us or dad left us in the trust fund. It's about none of that. This is you having the courage to say after 10 I do not respect the man that I share a bed with. He has a right, I believe, to know that. It's about contribution and purpose.

That's fair. It's taking us down a road that I don't want to go down, honey, which is that we're not going to end up married. We're going to go see a marriage counselor, and you're going to go get a job doing something in the next 30 days, or you are contributing to the end of our marriage. That's what a marriage counselor is going to teach you to say. We're not telling you to say- I've taken two marriage counselors, and it has not been successful, but maybe we need another person. You need somebody to get up in his grill.

I've even consulted a lawyer, and I found that I would have to pay him alimony Yeah. Despite putting him through two graduate degrees because he went back during this, got another graduate degree at very little cost because I happened to work where he got the degree.

I'm sorry, hon. I hate this for you. I hate this for you. It shouldn't be this way.

It's not right. It's wrong. But It's not going to get better until someone moves him. He's stuck, and somebody's going to have to love him enough to knock him out of the ditch because he can't climb it out. This is the Ramsey Show. What does the future hold for business. Ask nine experts and you'll get 10 different answers. Economic growth or a recession. Business taxes will go up or down. Ai will help us work or it will replace us all. But there's no such thing as a crystal That's why more than 40,000 businesses have future proofed themselves with NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud enterprise resource planning system. Ramsey Solutions uses NetSuite, and you good, too. Whether your company is earning millions or even hundreds of millions, NetSuite helps you respond to immediate challenges and seize your biggest opportunities. With one unified business management suite, there's only one source of truth for the visibility and control you need to make quick decisions. Netsuite's real-time insights and forecasting help you see into the future with actionable data. When you're closing the books in days, not weeks, you can spend less time looking backward and more time focusing on what's next.

Speaking of what's next, download the CFO's Guide to AI and machine learning at netsuite. Com/ramsey. It's free at netsuite. Com/ramsey. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality is my co-host today. Judy is in Los Angeles. Hi, Judy. Welcome to the Ramsey Show.

Hi. I am a long-time listener and first-time caller.

Okay.

I'm on Baby Step 6, and I listen to your show all the time, and you recommend never to cosign for someone. Correct. But I'm In this situation, would I do want to cosign for somebody under a certain circumstance? My husband's cousin, her cousin, she's been on Section 8. Anyway, she lost that. Now she's in her 60s. She needs to get an apartment. There's a special needs trust that her parents have set up for her. In order for her to get into an apartment, she needs to have someone cosign or her brother, who's the trustee, refused to do so. I was wondering, can I-Warning, warning, warning.

Why would her brother, who loves her more than you do, he's her brother, for God's sakes, not want to cosign?

He doesn't love her. Oh, Paul. He actually doesn't mind if she goes home. Yes, no, that's true. I don't believe it. It is totally true. It's from a very dysfunctional family. He's not willing. His wife is telling me he's willing to let her go homeless if they have to.

There is more to this story than you are telling or believing.

Well, she has a problem. She has personality disorder. That's why. Okay. Yeah, that's right. She's in her 60s. She's never worked in her life. She always worked on Section 8. She lost that.

Who is the custodian of the Special Needs Trust?

Her brother.

Her brother. Will you have access to the funds for this apartment, or does she have access to the funds?

Right. What I'm I'm not going to ask if it's okay, if that works, if you agree that's just the right thing for me to do. No, it's not. I can try to ask the brother for 14 months of pay in an account to me, and then I will transfer that to her monthly. Is that okay? If funding is available for a whole year, is it safe for me to cosign?

No. What if she trashes the place?

She won't trash the place, but she might… No, she's not like that, but she might have trouble with neighbors. That's the problem she has.

Or gets kicked out or has four people over or gets sweet-talked into.

She won't have people over. She'll just like… She loves cats. She'll probably take care of them.

Break all the Rules. Rules don't apply to her. Rules don't apply to her.

Yeah. Judy, we're going to tell you, no. If this money is available, then she can get the apartment under her name. You can write the checks every month for her. If she can't do that, that's fine.

But you I need to cosign.

But how do I prove to the apartment people that there's money available?

Well, you would have to have the money available.

Yeah, print off a statement.

Yeah. Did I show them? What do I do? Because we're in California, there's a lot of these places, and I don't live in the same town as she does. It's not easy for me to take her somewhere and talk to somewhere.

Well, you get on the phone with the apartment manager and you say, This is what's going on. She has a special needs trust. Brother's going to send you documentation documentation. He's going to end the documentation, send it to the property manager and say, We'll set aside the first 14 months and go ahead and just prepay the rent for 14 months. That's fine, too.

Oh, it's just prepay?

Yeah, but you don't cosign.

They're going to try to I need you to cosign.

Because you have a blind spot here, kiddo. This lady, she's gotten a hold of your heart, and she's sweet, and she does need someone to help her, but we need to define help very carefully. Help involves her behaving, and you're not willing to make that requirement, nor can you make that guarantee based on her 60 years of misbehavior. You're going to get screwed if you do this. Please don't do it. It's going to go up in flames.

Okay. I told the apartment that I have money, but I need to show some proof, right? That they trust.

Yeah, the brother is going to have to send documentation.

Yeah. By the way, you don't have this money, Judy. You still have to go through a guy that you say doesn't even love her, doesn't care about her, doesn't care if she ends up on the street. That's right. All of this is like two hypotheticals removed from reality.

Let me help you with this, okay? It's not that he doesn't love her. It's from the 16 times he tried to help her and it burned him, and he's done being burned, so he's putting up a boundary. That's different than not loving. You're calling it not love in a dysfunctional family. I'm calling her a dysfunctional person who needs love and help, but has burned everything around her to the ground to the point her own brother won't help her. You can't put that on him. I'm not going to let you do it. I don't even know him, and I'm not going He's not the jerk in this story. There's not a jerk in this story. There's a sad lady with mental illness, and you're going to get burned to the ground when her mental illness activates if you're signed on the documents.

I don't sign. I don't know an apartment complex that won't take your check if you got it. If they won't take your money, so she can get her her own place.

Listen, I'm a landlord. If I know what's going on here, I'm not putting her in there.

That's fair.

Because prepaying the rent ain't half my problem. It's the 93 cats that end up in my building.

Or all the neighbors or whatever.

Or she burns the neighbor's cat live in the front yard. I don't know what's going to happen here. I don't know what's going on with her. No, I don't want her as a tenant under any circumstances. Co-signer, prepaid, double paid. No, thank you. Life's too short to sign up for drama as a landlord. That's what you're going to face, hon, more than anything else. Please, honey, don't confuse this. You're trying to do a nice, good, noble thing in a really naive and unwise way. That was kind.

That's the best way to say it. I think this is a bigger conversation, Dave. When you want to help somebody and you get all these scenarios in your mind, and then you spend all these nights and weeks worrying about it, all of this phone call could have been already headed off. You could have already sat down with your brother. You could have already called an apartment complex and taken all these worrying variables off the table so that you know, Okay, here's the final step here. You probably would have found out a long time ago, you either don't need to be a cosigner or nobody's going to let her live there. You're going to have to come up with another option. But there's always like, Well, then I might do this, and then after that, I'm going to do this. You don't even know if all this is going to happen. You're so spun up about it. Just go find out.

I cosign for stuff when I was young and foolish, and I ended up paying it. One poor guy cosign for me. I went bankrupt. He ended up paying it. I had to go back and pay him later. His wife still don't like me. Yeah. 35 years later. So it's okay. It's valid. I mean, she got screwed. They didn't ultimately get, but I mean, she thought she did. And so I get it. I completely get it. Proverbs 17:18 says in the scripture, One lacking in sense, cosigns for another. When I cosigned, Judy, I was lacking in sense. If you cosign this, the Bible says you're lacking in sense. I didn't say, I get mad at God. Don't do it. That was pretty good.

I mean, you brought the Bible out, so there you go.

There we go. Brought the Bible out. That's the final right there. That's the final one. That's the one. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Kim is in New York. Hi, Kim. How are you?

Hi. Thank you for taking my call.

Sure. What's up?

I wanted to know how to save money for a mortgage down payment while you're paying rent.

Very hard.

It is.

How much debt have you got?

I can go through the numbers and I can tell you- No, just how much debt have you got?

Just give me the total.

I want to say about 40,000.

How much of that's your car?

Well, to me and my husband together, it's about… I owe 16, and he owes about 20.

Okay. How much is the car?

My car total with the insurance. Insurance or just the car?

No, the debt on the car. How much debt is on the car?

About 16. Okay.

Of your 40. Half of it's your car. Yeah. Okay. Here's the simple answer, but it's not a simple answer, is when you don't have any debt payments, you'll have more room in your budget. Before you start worrying about saving for a down payment on a house, let's clear the debt off. That may mean selling a car, it may mean taking an extra job. It will mean not eating out. It will mean not going on vacation so that I can get out of debt. Because if you didn't have any payments, you'd have money to save for your down payment. That's where it comes from. Your most powerful wealth building tool is your income. Don't give it to somebody else, and then you'll have it to save for a down payment. Simple but hard. This is the Ramsey Show.

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There's a money and marriage date night virtual event. Two-hour event hosted by Rachel Cruz and her own Dr. John Deloney will feature a lot of incredible parts of our money and marriage getaway. They're going to be diving into real topics like goal setting, budgeting. Sounds like a date night to me.

Gosh, you guys are a couple of romatics. I want to think about growing up in your house, that's what it feels like.

You know what? We never had a single budget committee meeting with the children. I'm just saying. All right, there will also be a Q&A, so Rachel and John can answer your questions live. This is happening October 29th. You can attend from anywhere, from the comfort of your own living room. You don't want to miss this one night to refresh your connection and communication. It's 39 bucks is all. It goes up after October sixth, a couple of weeks from now. You can get your tickets at ramsey solutions. Com/events, money, and marriage date night virtual from your home on October 29th. John, you and Rachel, let me tell you, guys, if you don't know, the two of them just sitting back here in the office are a riot. Then we put on a microphone and add a little adrenaline to it. Just for you guys, there are definitely two riots looking for a place to happen. It's worth the… If you just like good comedy, you will enjoy this because they're a lot of fun, both of them. They're both very quick, witted- Very opinionated. And very opinionated, and they're right and all that. She's not always right, Dave.

They'll help you. No, she's definitely not always. Just thinking about... Oh, well, anyway. Yeah. So, Rachel Cruz, my daughter and Dr. John Deloney, October the 29th. Only $39. Ticket prices will go up soon. Go to ramsey solutions. Com/events. It is a money and marriage date night. There will be serious stuff. I don't want to overstate the comedy part. It's a very serious topic. They're going to go through the details. They're going to give you something for your money, give you something for your marriage, and give you something for both of those things working together. Don't miss it. David is in Knoxville. Hi, David. Welcome to The Ramsey Show. Hello. Hi. What's up? Well, my financial advisor has recommended that we shift. I mean, we have historically just invested in mutual funds, as you've recommended, but that we shift some money to a separate managed account.

Just wanted your opinion on that.

Well, a managed account in financial advisors parlance is mutual funds. Well, some of this was individual stocks. Okay. Well, you can do that in a managed account. Well, that was- Yeah, I I would not do that. I do not do that. I know more about individual stocks than your financial advisor does. I'm not doing that. So no, thank you. But a managed account, most of the… Under the new fiduciary rules that came out about three years ago, ERISA and the SEC just tore up that industry. Most of the accounts are now managed accounts, meaning you pay like 1% of the portfolio a year, and they manage the entire portfolio, and it can be a portfolio of mutual funds. That's what most of our smart investor pros use now. Now, we do not recommend using single stocks in that, but you can use that approach for mutual funds only, is my point.

Okay.

But let me tell you the downside, and I'm being critical because I don't know your guy, so I could be overstating this. When a financial advisor says he can manage stocks better than a billion dollar mutual fund can manage the exact same stocks inside the mutual fund, that screams of arrogance to me. Again, I know enough about it that I could easily make that case that I was going to do that. But all the data and all the research that I have says I will not outperform the mutual fund with my little single-stock portfolio with my little financial advisor in Knoxville, Tennessee, as my stock picker. No, thank you. I'll pass. But if he If he wants to do the other stuff, and I would be worried about that in terms of your relationship with him personally. But if he wants to run mutual funds, my guy runs managed accounts. I don't personally do that with mine because I'm old school and I've got all my stuff set up. But all my kids run managed accounts with our local SmartVestor Pro, but it's all mutual funds in there.

Is it a red flag if you get an out-of-the-blue call from your advisor saying, Hey, I'm recommending we move it all to X, Y, Z Because the word on the street is that a managed care-Managed account. Yeah, managed account advisor will move you to packages where there's some kickback or they get an extra incentive to do so. Kind of like on a lot, they'll move.

They can do that, and some of them will, but it is a red flag if somebody starts moving big chunks around because it says that the original thing that they believe, they no longer believe.

It's a philosophical statement sometimes. Yeah, it is.

Okay, all right. It is. There's something new that beats all of the data that we have. First, I don't believe it. Okay? Yeah. All the data that we have, the average person buying and selling stocks on their own account with their own financial advisor loses money. You can't compete. They lose money. They not only don't make money, they lose money on average. That's the data. That's the actual research. Years ago, the Wall Street Journal did a funny article that they actually did this. The problem is the lack of diversification because you're picking seven stocks instead of 90 to 200. Mutual fund has 90 to 200 stocks in it, which gives you a lot of safety, versus if you got to pick five or three, you're betting the farm on a very narrow ledge here. They actually took a monkey and blindfolded the monkey and gave it darts, and it threw it at the wall and hit stocks. They picked those stocks, and then they gave the stock the right to go pick any three stocks they wanted to pick and come back 18 months later, the blindfolded monkey beat most of them. Point being, not that the guys are stupid, these are smart people picking these stocks.

But when you can only pick three and If your mutual fund can have 90 to 200, your safety level goes away. You lose all the power of diversification. There's an arrogance to it that says, I can pick the stocks better than a guy running an American funds or a Fidelity or whatever.

Name whatever big mutual fund company. Now it's you sitting in your house thinking or some guy thinking, I can beat these supercomputers with all the AI tech. You can't.

Exactly. The thing is, for instance, in a mutual fund, they'll have a whole team of researchers. You have one guy or gal that comes to work in a car longer than your house, and their only job is to study every detail of the automotive industry all for the last 25 years.

Or they've sent some guy who lives in South Africa for two years in a mine talking to the transactions.

You can't beat that. You're going to compete with that with your guy in Knoxville, Tennessee. No, you're not. Or Nashville, Tennessee, or Los Angeles, or New York. Because of the specialization of that, the nuances of that, that guy knows more about the automotive industry than I know. He's going to pick a better automotive stock and know when to get in and out of Ford, basically based on EVs or whether or not Tesla is going to burn up or not, literally, metaphorically or whatever. All of that. He's got his finger on all that. The mutual funds are just... They've got the best people on the planet, and they've got a track record that shows it.

They've got a net. You can spread it out.

Yeah, it's spread out. Spread your portions to seven, yes to eight, for a disaster may come upon the land. Ecclesiastes. All All right. Freedom.

You're dropping Bible all day today.

Freedom.

You've been on a Bible trip for the last three weeks.

It's almost did, yeah. Phoenix, Arizona. Freedom's with us. Hi, Freedom. Oh, you're not with us at all because we're going into a break. See what happens when you don't work for a while, you don't even know where your commercial breaks are. That's how that works.

It feels like we're driving and I'm talking to my friend and you're just looking straight over at the- Exit? No, you're just looking right at the passenger and the passenger is like, Hey, look, we're in red light, red light, red light. You're just talking outside and quoting scriptures.

Here it comes. Here it comes. Dropping Ecclesiastes right in there, heading straight into commercial break. This is the Ramsey Show. I've been doing this show for over 30 years, and some of the saddest calls I have taken are from situations that are completely preventable. Yeah. What's so hard is I feel like one of those, especially the ones that I'm like, Oh, it's terrible. People that call in and their spouse has passed away suddenly, and they don't have life insurance. When you have to think through, how am I going to pay my bills in the middle- How am I going to eat next week? Yeah, in the middle of all that grief. It's terrible. Life insurance is the one thing, especially as a mom with three little kids that I'm so big on for people to get because it's inexpensive. Xander is the place that Winston and I actually get all of our life insurance. It doesn't cost much because Xander shops among a gazillion different companies. It doesn't cost much. You just have to admit that someday you're not going to be here. You got to say it out loud, and you got to say, I'm going to say I love you to my family by taking care of them and taking the time to put this stuff in place.

It So Stinking Pizza. To get a free quote, call 800-356-4282. That's 800-356-4282, or go to zander. Com. Thank you for joining us, America. We're glad you're here. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Today's question of the day is brought to you by YReFi. 93% of undergraduate private student loans are cosigned When you are delinquent, Nana or Uncle Joe is drowning with you. But there is a way out. Yrefi refinances defaulted private student loans. Other places won't touch, and they give you a low fixed rate loan built for you. Go to yrefi. Com/ramsey today. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y. Com/ramsey. Com/ramsey. Com. Ramsey might not be available in all states.

All right, today's question comes from Courtney in Washington. Courtney writes, I'm 23 and I've been married for one year. Last night, he admitted to me that... I'm assuming husband. My husband admitted to me that I am better with money, meaning I don't like debt and that he spends more than he makes. He gave me his credit card and debit card to hold and asked me to give him an allowance for necessary purchases. He has a bad habit of using credit payment plans and buying too many toys. I don't like the idea of holding his cards and controlling his actions. I understand accountability partnership, but I believe putting limitations on a full-grown man will lead to resentment in our marriage, even if he asked for it. Is his asking me to hold his cards reasonable? If I do hold his cards for a period, what can I do to make those spending habits stay gone?

How do you get so wise at 23 years old?

Courtney, you are Courtney. I was about to say the same thing, man. Touchdown. Who is this person? It's amazing. Wow. I had this exact conversation. I was probably 26, maybe 25. I see the trajectory. I see the things that plagued my family growing up, and I'm on the track. It was like, I need you to drive. Now, in retrospect, I understand that that started a power struggle between me and my wife that lasted years and years and years. I'm happy for this dude that he was like, Hey, I'm not doing this right.

I like his humility. Yes, there you go. That's the beginning of repentance.

But you got to do this thing together. Just got to do it together. Yeah, I'll start with that.

What do you think, man? I think it's exactly right. She's on to something here. She doesn't want to be his mommy.

His mom, that's it.

She wants to be his wife.

By the way, husbands, it is very hard for your mom to be romantically interested in you. When you expect your wife to mother you, it does something to the desire and eros in your home. Don't do that. Work together. He can, A, cut up the credit card and put his debit card in a drawer and get cash.

Carry that around. The two of you start doing a budget together, and you pinkie, swear, and spit, shake that that's a contract, and I'm sticking to this, and that's my accountability. We are going to work together because no one should be doing it by themselves. That's right.

Or he can text you Every time he feels like making a purchase, just as a way to extend the gap.

No, if it's in the budget, you can make the purchase.

No, but when he's about to impulse buy, not in the budget.

You can't buy it if it's not in the budget.

No, I just want him to identify, Oh, I'm about to do something stupid. It's just extending that between stimulus and response. You can do some of those things. I did hand... Here's the deal. It's about putting in hurdles. But yeah, I love her sense that she already feels like, Hey, I'm going to end up as mom. I don't like this.

Now, that's very wise. Way ahead. The answer is no, I'm not going to take this over for you, but yes, we're going to work together. Yes, as two grownups, we're going to agree on a plan that serves our future and serves our present and serves our household and serves our marriage. Then we're going to stick to that plan as two adults. When one of us has When an inner child wakes up and wants to go crazy at Costco, you have to stick to the plan. That's right. Because there's hell to pay if you don't stick to the plan.

Define what hell is, right?

Hell is you go home and you didn't stick to the plan. Your spouse is not going to be happy with you.

I think it's an important call. I have told people, just give your credit card or give your debit card to your spouse. I was wrong on that. I don't think that's wise. I think what's wiser is if you can't control it, then let's cut up both cards and you carry cash for a while. Go get one reissued when you're ready. Well, here's the thing.

What you need is a reason to control it. When you have no boundary, nothing is written down, then everything's okay. That includes the 92-gallon thing of mustard at Costco, which everyone needs. We know that. A drama must. Apparently, because you can get it on a two-wheeler, right? But we impulse stupid butt stuff, mainly because we don't have, A, any price to pay if we do it, and B, there was nothing in line before we got there. It's like I used to tell my kids about premarital sex. I said, Okay, we're going to sit down and we're going to have a discussion before you end up in the back seat. Because if you don't decide before you end up in the back seat, it's over when you get to the back seat. That's right. You got to decide before you get to Costco what you're going to spend. I'm not against Costco. I like Costco. We're actually an endorser of theirs. But before you get to the restaurant, before you get to whatever. You don't come home with a new bass boat and go, Look what I did, honey.

Can I tell you, as a former Impulse buyer, just a clicker and buyer-I am, too. I have to deal with the fact that I was creating a life where I wasn't very alive. If it wasn't that, I was flipping channels. It was just a life.

Yeah, it's dull.

When I dressed that, how can I inject some life into my life? Dude, I don't think about it that much.

I remember the first time I went to Sam's and got out without buying anything. I thought it was like a spiritual victory.

I know. Dave's out in the parking lot.

I'm like, I did it. I got in and out, didn't buy anything.

If we're celebrating, I went into Home Depot the other day, didn't have what I wanted, and I walked out in and buy one thing. You didn't even buy a tool? That was a huge moment for me.

That's a breakthrough. That's a breakthrough, John. I'm proud of you.

It was good.

My name is John, and I like tools. That's the thing, guys. But when you have a plan, and here's what changed it for me. It's like, okay, I I want a good future. I want a good marriage. I want to be in agreement with my spouse more than anything Costco has. That's the key. When it's written down and I made a promise, I can't break my promise. If you're getting itchy-I don't get itchy to break my promise. Underneath the itchy. It doesn't come up. I really don't. Now, if I get itchy, I just go, I can't do it. It's not in the plan. Yeah, I got to go do something else. Because the plan supersedes the itch. I like it. The contract with my wife, the word I gave to her that this is what we're going to spend money on so that we freaking have a future. That's it. Now, that contract means a whole lot more than that stupid item. That's it. But you don't have anything to gage that item against like that boundary, and then all is fair. You just buy everything. The same thing is true with your stupid Amazon button.

Click, click, click, click, click, submit, submit, submit. Empty the cart into your dadgum front porch. There's nothing in your life that's telling you no. There's no budget, there's no plan, I can just go make some more money. I'll out earn my stupidity. Submit, submit, submit. Isn't it interesting that the word is submit? It's submit.

Yeah. I mean, it's a good way.

You bow down. Bow down deeply and submit to the Amazon God.

There's a great Instagram reel where there's a guy watching his wife and she's doing yard work or something, and it just is slowly panning. He said, My goodness, I won the lottery with the most amazing, hardworking, beautiful, and it panned to the front porch, and it just stacked up with boxes. He's like, Good God.

That's pretty good.

Yeah, it was pretty great.

It was good. Yeah, Courtney, kudos to you at 23 to grasp both of you. Both of you. A Very good concept.

Humility and wisdom already in this young marriage.

Kudos to him for being humble enough to go. At 23, man, that's a big manly thing to do to say, I can't do this by myself, because a lot of 23-year-olds desperately don't want to look like a little boy. He walked in there like a man and said, I need some help. He did the wrong thing, and you got on to that. But he did it for the right reasons. You guys have the ingredients of an incredibly powerful marriage that becomes very wealthy, and you've got it at a young age. So congratulations. That's a great question. Really, really good. So learning to work together. I got to tell you, there's certain segments of our culture, certain demographics, certain races, certain things where it's not unusual that mama pays the bills and daddy brings home the bacon. I'm stepping all in that stuff for some of you because you watched your mama do it. It doesn't mean it's right.

Or the other side, daddy does it all, mama doesn't ask any questions, right?

Yeah. Sharon had the, I called it scarlet O'Hara syndrome. It's like, Do whatever you want to do, honey. If the children don't have clothes, we'll just use the drapery. It's like, remember Scarlett made stuff out of the drape shop.

You got to work together.

Scarlett O'Hara syndrome. There it is. Got to work together. This is The Ramsey Show. Before we get to the next caller, I got some good news for you. Even when this portion of today's show runs out of time, there's still plenty more for you to tune into. Just head on over to the Ramsey Network app to finish today's show for free right there on the home screen. If you don't have the app, just search Ramsey Network in the App Store, Google Play, or simply click the link in the show notes for an easy download. You never know what call is coming up next, so be sure and check out the Ramsey Network app. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's The Ramsey Show. We help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality, host of the Dr. John Deloney Show, PhD in Counseling. He's our Ramsey personality that is my co-host today. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. The phone number here is 888-825-5225. Freedom is with us in Phoenix, Arizona. Hi, Freedom. How are you? I'm pretty good. How are you? Better than I deserve.

What's up?

I am a baby brand new business owner. I opened up a concrete company, and I was just wondering if I finance a work truck or some heavy equipment, or if I should just keep grinding and little by little and pay for it by cash.

Okay. Well, Freedom, if you listen to the show much, we tell people not to borrow money, and we don't borrow money. You already knew that before you called, right? Yes, sir. Okay. I run a business. I run a business called Ramsey Solutions. It started on my card table 32 years ago in my living room. We're sitting in a building in a campus that's worth somewhere around $600 million, and we have never borrowed a dime over that 30 years. We've just taken our profits and reinvested and hustled and grinded, taking our profits and reinvested. The benefits of that, the downside of that is everything goes slower. The benefit is you don't have to do it over because you don't crash every three years. Every time something goes upside down. I don't take many steps backwards. All my steps are forward because I don't borrow money, and so I never get pinched. Covid comes along, I didn't get pinched. I have no debt and a pile of cash. I didn't get pinched. Other people doing what I'm doing are out of business because they couldn't cash flow their payroll when the government shut them down. You got to pay those payments on that bulldozer, dude, whether you can use it or not, because, well, I was going to say weather, but in Phoenix, there's no issue.

But yeah, it's not I like it's going to be a rain problem for you. But anyway, something else happens, goes sideways in maybe a presidential election and the market slowed down or something and you couldn't get work, you got to pay the payments anyway on that dozer and it'll take you down. I would tell you to grow slower and more sure-footed. Some people would call it sustainable. I would just use your name as my guidance. I don't want to give up my freedom. But it's frustrating as a business owner, I will tell you. There's been times over the years that I wanted to do something that I really, really, really thought was a good idea business-wise, and I didn't have the money. I couldn't do it because I don't borrow money. But then something come along six months later that'll make me know, Oh, that's why I wasn't able to do that. I would have been up a dadgum creek if I had done that. The other thing that happens when you borrow money in business, how long you've been doing this?

Concrete, I just opened it up like a month ago.

Okay, so you got a lot of energy and enthusiasm right now, right?

Yes, but I'm trying to get a little discouraged because it is just me. I'm just a one-man guy trying to do a three-man job.

That's the hardest part of business until you get up. You get up to about 10 people where other people are doing some of the work. It's nice, I'll tell you, ahead of time. But even borrowing money into that won't work because you'll go sideways. Here's what happens. Let me ask you this. As an entrepreneur, I'm a fellow entrepreneur, every morning when I take my dog for a walk on the golf course, every morning when you take a shower, those of us that are entrepreneurs have six or seven hundred ideas by the time we get to work. I got an idea a minute, do you?

Every hour.

Okay, there you go. All right. I can tell you from 30 years of doing this that 90% of my brilliant early morning cup of coffee ideas, when implemented, suck. I have survived in business. 90% of my ideas, I've made everything that you've heard of Dave Ramsey, all the money, all the brand recognition, all the celebrity, or whatever it is you want to call this crap that I do. I've done all of it on about 10% of ideas. You guys all know me for the 10% that worked. If I had borrowed money on the 90% that didn't work, I It would be buried in bankruptcy many times over. Because when you borrow money, you magnify your stupidity. That's what's coming. So please, I'm giving you my best sales pitch. I bought it. I bought it. Please don't give up your freedom. Please move a little slower. Go make you some money. Bust it, bust it, bust it. Get you some hires where you're not doing it by yourself. Get you a piece, rent a piece of equipment, turn it back in, rent a piece of equipment, turn it back in, and then go buy you a used one that the guy who went into debt had to turn into the repo lot.

And go buy it off the repo, go buy you a used one-off the repo lot for the last guy that thought he had a great idea in your world. It's everything, man. It's everything. It changes. Eighty % of small businesses fail in the first five years, and the number one reason for failure, they say, is cash flow. Cash flow is starved by two possible things in small business: not paying your freaking taxes and setting your sales tax aside, and going in debt and having payments. When you have payments and no revenue, that's called cash flow problems, and you go out of business. It returns your dream into a nightmare.

I think the best... As I travel around the country the last four or five years in meeting small business owners, especially-We see them all the time with Entree.

All the time. Entree leadership.

To a person who runs their business like this, there's this It's the bubble gum shrimp scenario that when they don't have any payment, something comes along, there's a storm of some sort, and they're the only boat left in the harbor, and they get all of it. We have Entree leaders come up for special lunch It happens up here sometime, and I just hear it over and over. We're the only ones in my neighborhood or my city that made it through COVID on this particular weird little niche. Now we have all the market share.

You got all their employees.

We got everybody. All the expertise. We got the expertise. All the expertise.

That's where I- The best We buy their equipment at pennies on the dollar.

It's like you drive a minivan, drive a minivan, drive a minivan, then you get it all.

I've done it over and over and over again over the years. The fastest way to get rich quick is don't.

It's don't, yeah. But there's a moment you Just show up and show up and show up, and then a moment happens and you're in the right place.

But it is frustrating. So frustrating. It's frustrating because there's something in front of you and everything in your brain says it's going to work and you got to try it and you got to try it. Only after it doesn't work, do you know why it It doesn't work. You don't know what you don't know. When you borrow into it, you magnify your stupidity. I've been so tempted so many times. I could tell you 25 stories, but I don't have time, of times that I really, really... Then eight months later, I go, Oh, well, there you go. God protected me again. I thought I was going to go down. Because I always just say, All right, God, if you want me to do this, you got to send some money because I don't have any. You got some. If he doesn't send money, I figure he don't want me to do it. Ta-da.

He sent you money when I was applying.

That's a person of faith. If you're not a person of faith, you don't have that option. You're just yelling at the sky at that point. But in my case, I truly believe God owns this, and I truly believe if he wants us to have a computer, he'll give us the money to buy the computer. He wants us to have a building, he'll give us the money to buy the building, a bulldozer, whatever it is. Until he does, something's not right, something's not aligned yet, and I'm waiting on that. Frustrates the crud out of me because I really do want to be God, and it's his job. This is The Ramsey Show.

This show is sponsored by Better Help. This is the season for Halloween. It's October. We're wearing costumes, and we're wearing masks. If you haven't started planning your costume yet, get on it. While you're thinking about it, I want you to be honest. A lot of us hide ourselves. We hide our true selves behind costumes and masks all the time. We do this at work, we do this around our friends, we do this around our families. We even do this when we look at ourselves in the mirror. I know because I've been there multiple times in my life, and it's the worst. If you feel like you're stuck hiding behind masks and costumes all the time, if you find yourself hiding from your true self, I want you to consider talking with a therapist. Therapy is a place where you can be honest, where you can talk to somebody else and reflect and learn, and you can accept all the parts of yourself over time and start living an authentic life. Masks and costumes should be for Halloween parties, not for our emotions and our true selves. And if you're considering therapy, try calling my friends a Betterhelp.

Betterhelp is 100% online therapy. You can talk with your therapist anywhere, so it's convenient for you and your schedule. Just fill out a short online survey and you'll be matched with a licensed therapist. Plus, you can switch therapist at any time for no additional cost. Take off the costumes and take off the mask with Betterhelp. Visit betterhelp. Com/daloni to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp. Com/deloni. Hey, good folks. Dr. John Deloni here. Don't you think life is too short to hate Mondays? Listen, you're worth loving the work you do and where you do it. So guess what? Ramsey Solutions is hiring. If you're ready to join an amazing team that's all about changing lives and spreading hope, we want to see your application. Right now, we're hiring for technology, sales, marketing, writing, copy-editing, and creative roles. Check out all our job postings at ramsey solutions. Com/careers. That's ramsey solutions. Com/careers.

Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality is my co-host today. The best way to win at something is to do it on purpose. Very few times do people accidentally win. You don't accidentally become wealthy. You execute a plan step by step over a period of time. You don't accidentally have a good marriage. You execute a plan step step over time. You don't accidentally raise great kids. It doesn't happen. It's a process. It's an intentional act, this thing called success. The best way to make the most of your money is by creating and sticking to a plan, a monthly budget. Every dollar, the world's best budgeting app, makes it simple to plan your spending, track your expenses, follow the baby steps, plan out every paycheck, be in agreement with your spouse, get out of debt. We teach you how to do every bit of it. Download every dollar for free in the App Store or Google Play, and click the link in the description if you're listening to YouTube or a podcast. Fin is in Detroit. Hi, Fin. Welcome to The Ramsey Show.

Thanks for having me.

Sure. What's up?

Yeah. I'm 22. I graduated a year early to not go into debt. I'm looking at a career change into counseling and psychology, so I'm looking at going to grad school for counseling work in clinical psychology. Right now, I have- A career changed.

Did you even start your other career?

No, I'm a big photographer, so I was interested in photojournalism and realized that traveling around all the time wasn't that sustainable.

Okay, so you got a degree currently in what?

Political science.

Which has nothing to do with any of this. Okay.

Yeah. Okay. All right. Yeah.

All right. You want to go… We need some more good mental health professionals, so good on you. What are you thinking about doing?

Yeah. I'm interested in a master's in counseling or social work and have been considering the possibility of trying to get into a doctoral program in clinical psych because those are funded programs. Now, ultimately, I need the background and the experience to get into those programs. In the meantime, I've been volunteering in psychology labs. But imagine that if I can get into a master's program, I need the capital to be able to pay for that program. Right now, I have about 22,000 saved.

Where'd you get that?

From savings and working throughout high school and college. Good for you, man.

Well done. What's the master's cost? About 35, probably?

Depending on the program, You can go for 30, you can go for 50, you can go for 80. A program like University of Michigan costs 80 in state, which is crazy, in my opinion. And then if you go for a lesser-tier program, but you're still getting the letters next to your name, can be between 30 and 40.

Do you know where the woman that I see for a therapist, you know where she went to school?

No.

I have no idea.

None.

Yes. When I was at Belmont University, all the therapists who worked for me there, they went to school. I don't know. They're amazing therapists. My guess is a school like University of Michigan is going to be very research-heavy and it's probably funded. It's probably got a whole bunch of other steps to it. If you want to go be a research psychologist and less about working with people and more about learning statistics and learning about people and spending your life in a lab, be an amazing school to go to, and you'll have to find out one of those funded PhD programs. If you want to just go be a social worker or clinical counselor in your local community, which it's an amazing job, dude, go to the best program in your community that you can afford. I strongly recommend, see if you can get a job at the university because those almost always come with some tuition discount. Even better, if you can get a job in residence life, you get to live your mission. You get to work with all kinds of people going through all kinds of struggles and challenges.

I'm crazy like a crazy college student. It is wild.

But that's when their family issues and their psychology issues and their emotional issues come up and addiction, all stuff. But also it comes with free housing, too. That'd be what I would recommend you do. I want you to go to grad school. It's what I did. I love it. For my graduate counseling degree, I found the partnership with the university that would fund it. It was different than my other PhD that I paid for out of pocket. I borrowed it out of pocket, and it nearly buried.

How would a university get you those resources? What are you looking for?

In your situation, I'm looking for any job I can get on a college campus that has a tuition reimbursement.

Janitor. Janitor.

Yeah, anything.

Got you.

Ra, resident assistant in the dorm. Anything you can do. If it gets you in their program and cuts the tuition in half, and now you got 30 turning into 15, they're paying you, and you've got 22 in the bank, ding, ding, we're done with the masters. That's right.

Yeah. At this point, in terms of investments on the site, I mean- No.

The best investment you can make is you. It's you.

Okay, got you.

Because here's what I want you to do? Here's what you do with investments. You're looking for ROI. Sorry, John. No, go ahead. What's the ROI on 80 grand versus 30 grand? That's what we're looking at. What's the return on investment? Okay? John's telling you it's not there on the 80.

Yeah.

He's got a PhD in counseling. You just called the right guy. I have a PhD in DUMB. You don't need my opinion.

Here's the other thing I want you to do. I want you to go through When I started this program. I started with a very particular group of people that I wanted to work with. I ended up in a radically different place because I had to do practicums and internships, and I had different professors, and I met different professionals along the If you get out and you owe $30,000 or $50,000, and you know clinical counselor starting out don't make a ton of money, then you are going to have to do not what you want to do, what you feel passionate about, what you feel called to do. You're going to have to do whatever they tell you to do. I want a world of therapists out there that are not beholden to a bank, but are beholden to their communities. That's what I really, really want, because they're free to help everybody and anybody. Not they have to pay their bills first, and that's heartbreaking for me. Okay?

Yeah.

So go get them in. Get that master's degree.

Just don't borrow money. You seem like a person talking to you that 22,000 in the bank. You ran this course already. You knocked out three years. You seem like a person that is very much a pragmatist, very practical in your view on things. I'm going to encourage you to lean into that. Everything we're telling you to do is right with who you already are.

And shoot weddings on the side. Shoot weddings all weekend. You'll make cash.

You Get your camera out, man. You'll make some money.

She weddings all Saturdays, all Sundays, all Friday nights when you're in grad school, and just work, work, work, work, you'll get it out, man. Good on you, dude.

That's good. That's excellent.

You'll hear a lot of undergrads coming out with $22,000 in cash in the bank. That's fantastic.In.

Three years.In.

Three years, yeah.

Knock it out. That's a hard worker. He did it to stay out of debt.

That's right.

Yeah, I wanted out of school.

Man, I'd go back tomorrow.

I had no desire to stay. I was working 60 hours a week. All I wanted was out so I could focus on work. It was so hard. Open phones at 888-825-5225. John, let's circle back because someone just tuned into this for the first time. John has a PhD in counseling, a PhD in higher Ed, and he was serving as dean of students several different universities when he came here. He was at a local university is how we found him, and we knew he could do this job, and it's turned out to a massive hit. He and I have had this discussion. He's actually featured before we hired him in our documentary on student loan debt called Boreowed Future that you can watch for free now on YouTube. John and I have had this discussion many times. I have done I've searched and searched and searched and searched and cannot find a single piece of research that is credible that says where you went to school is correlated with your level of success in any field.

The The research that exists there talks about it's less about the institution and more about the people who also go to that institution. Basically, the research says if you can get into some of these top, top, top, top, top tier schools where you will benefit over the long haul is who your classmates are because they're going to go start businesses and they're going to go become these fans and they're going to call you because you all are pals and you're buddies and you call the guys that you know and you went to school with.

But for 99- The number of times that people say, I want a cancer doctor because he went to that school.

That's it. For 99% of Almost zero. Get out untethered. Please go to college, and I'm high on college. You know that, Dave. But go untethered. Get out so you don't own anybody. I want a doctor that is not beholden to anyone but what is right. I want a therapist or a pastor who's not beholden anybody but what is right.

There it is. This is The Ramsey Show. You know my philosophy on planning and preparing. Being proactive is always better than being reactive. We have a provider we recommend that can help you stay prepared for unexpected medical situations. I have a medical emergency kit from the doctors at the wellness company. Guys, let me tell you, you really should check this out. This is not a simple first aid kit. The medical emergency kit contains doctor-prescribed medicines to treat over 30 common and serious medical conditions. Ivermectin, the life-saving medicine, generic Z-Pack to shorten the duration of colds and you feel coming on, amoxacillin for infections, earaches, strep throat, and pneumonia, a medical emergency kit from the wellness company. It's like having an urgent care in your home. Order 100% online in minutes Then fill out the brief questionnaire in your email and your kit ships to your door. Visit urgentcarekit. Com/ramsey and use the promo code Ramsey for 15% off. That's promo code Ramsey urgentcarekit. Com/ramsey. Hey, folks, there's a lot of half-baked investing advice out there, but here's what you can do to get more confident about this stuff. Check out the SmartVestor program. Smartvestor connects you with local financial advisors who have the heart of a teacher.

They'll help you level up your knowledge and build a retirement plan based on your goals, not theirs. Go to ramsysolutions. Com/smartvestor to get connected and get more confident about your plan. That's ramsey solutions. Com/smartvestor. Ramsey Solutions is a paid non-client promoter of participating pros.

Learn more at ramsey solutions.

Com/smartvestor. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality as my co-host today in the lobby of Ramsey Solutions on the debt-free stage. Mercy is with us. Hi, Mercy. How are you?

I'm doing good, Dave. How are you?

Better than I deserve. Where do you live?

I live in Temple, Texas.

Cool. Welcome to Nashville. Thank you. How much debt have you paid off, Mercy?

I have paid off $18,000.

Good for you. How long did that take?

It took me around nine months, Dave.

Good for you. And your range of income during that time?

42,000.

42,000, okay. What debt was the $18,000?

That was my car, Dave.

Yeah. All right. Mercy, how old are you?

I'm 29 years old.

Cool. What is your country of origin? I hear an accent.

I was born and raised in Kenya, and I moved to the States three and a half years ago.

Three and a half years ago? Yes, sir. Eighteen months ago, half that time, you started working on getting… No, nine months ago, you started getting out of debt. You paid off 18,000 in debt. How does a girl in Texas from Kenya run into the Ramsey stuff and decide to get out of debt?

I joined the military last year, January.

Thank you for your service.

Thank you. Then my first duty station, Fort Cavazos, Texas. Got there, I needed a car, and I did what I thought I should do. Got a car on payments. Then I think less than two weeks later, I ran into Rachel on Instagram, and I liked her message. I looked into it and I found The Ramsey Show. And ever since that day, I have not missed an episode. I just got fired up. This is how I was... What you teach is really how I was raised. If you don't have the money, you don't buy it.

So that-Wait a minute. They teach you common sense in Kenya? Wow.

Yeah. I thought it just clicked. And then the teachings from the Bible as well. So that resonated with me, and I decided this debt had to go. Then that's when I just started. Double the payments, triple living on nothing, rice and beans. On April 30th, I became debt free.

Way to go. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. Who was cheering on along the way?

My family in Kenya, my son, Jeremy, my American family in Colorado. Then after I became debt free, I met my boyfriend, Tony, who's also doing I did Dave Ramsey plan, and he has been cheering me on Baby Step 3, and here we are today.

All right. Very cool. Way to go, Tony. Good stuff. Okay, tell me how this thing works. Because obviously, you've You've been here only three and a half years. You joined the military. How does that work with your citizenship? I don't know.

Once you join, first of all, you acquire permanent residency, and then that's when you're able to join and serve. Then through the military is when I got my citizenship last year in June. All right. Yes.

Awesome. Wow, that's a good deal. Thank you. Very cool. Good for you. I'm proud of you. How does it feel to be free again?

It's weightless. I cannot explain it. Doing my budget every month and not seeing that extra payment that I would have paid the car dealership, it feels surreal. I have so much money. Yeah, that $500 back is everything. Then also been able to... My sister and I are cash flowing my grandmother's house in Kenya. That has been a blessing. My grandmother raised us after... I lost my mom when I was 10, and that has been... It's been a blessing.

You're able to buy her a house now?

Yes, we're building a house.

You're building it by cash? Yes. Okay. How long will it take to build it?

We're almost done, actually. By December, she'll be in the house. We started as soon as I... Right before I became debt-free, and then it's been more money just chunked on it.

How old is your grandmother?

Close to 80. Wow.

Yes. You're special.

Thank you.

You're not even real, Mercy. This is amazing. This is so extraordinary.

Americans, you all got to hear this. She just traded an $18,500 car payment and built her grandmother a house as a result in Kenya. That's who raised her.

That's legacy right there. Wow.

What's the picture? What's the house?

That was our whole house. That's where you grew up? That's where I grew up. Yeah. Okay. I was, I think, built.

Now you built her a new house? Yes. All right. I'm so proud of you. Thank you.

You're amazing. That's the new house.

Oh, wow.

I want to live in that house. That's pretty great.

Look at the roof on that. That's pretty cool. Those of you that aren't on YouTube, look deeply into your radio. Oh, my gosh. Mercy. Mercy.

I ran track in college, and the vast majority of my teammates were from Kenya. It was two years- Which means you were the slowest guy on the team. He used to call me Muzungu. Yes. Yeah. By far. There was this understanding they got here, and there was so much opportunity and so much wide-eye. How can I participate right away, right now? It feels like this idea that, Oh, you can just get it all right now. Don't worry about it. We'll get it later.

That got you the car payment.

But right. If you don't know how insidious this stuff is, everything's shiny and new, and this isn't just people who come from other foreign countries. This is all of us who are looking at our neighbors, looking around. We see these shiny new things, and we get so taken with them that I want it right now. There's all these plans for, Oh, that's a problem for future you. You right now needs this. What do you tell somebody that is just looking around seeing all this opportunity, but they don't know that it's not really real?

That's also a big thing that just not... I think sacrifice, for me, would be the biggest one. Just knowing that, you know what? When Dave says you're driving and the car next to you is really nice and big and you want it, but it's all payments. I got it and I said, I'm not going to feel jealous or want a life that I cannot afford. I will do this brick by brick. Like you say, we get here and we're told, You have to have a credit score. You have to have a credit card. We all believe that until... Because they say, That's the only way. But no, it's not the only way. There's a better way.

Mercy is a hero. You know who the real hero is? The grandmother that raised that. I'm telling you. The grandmother that created that.

I'm telling you, man.

That woman. That's who we need to get on the air. Sheesh.

It's really amazing.

You're amazing. Oh, my gosh. This is wonderful.

Do me and Dave an honor? Yes. Can you do a debt-free scream in Swahili? This will be the first one ever. Yes. Then you can do one. If you want to do another one in English, but if you want to do a Swahili, I've never had a Swahili free scream Depretz Cream, have we?

No, for sure we haven't.

Would you do that? That would be amazing. I love that.

I would love to do both.

I'm so proud of you. You're absolutely amazing. I will tell you this before we do that, that all the data that we have says that someone who comes to this country from another country, legally, I'm going to pronunciate that, pronounce it carefully, like she did, comes here under the law, you are four times more likely to become a millionaire than someone who is born in America. There's a lot of supposition on why that might be so, but some of it is that you actually appreciate the fact that we have freedom and opportunity, and you're going to take advantage of it. You have a high likelihood, a much higher likelihood, than maybe someone else that sits next to you there at the post of becoming a millionaire because of what you're doing. Now, add the Ramsey stuff to that, the debt-free stuff to that. Work This woman's going… It's amazing. All right, Mercy from Temple, Texas. What a story. $18,000 paid off in nine months, making 42 from Kenya. We're going to start it out with Swahili Healy. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream.

Tattoo Billy Moja.

I love it.

Yeah.

That was rad. Thank you for that. That was a gift to me. Thank you.

Good call, John. Good call. All right, you want to do an American one, too? Yes, sir. All right, let's do one English.

English dingle. All right, here we go. All right. Three, two, one. I'm dead free.

Yeah, baby.

Oh, and I built my grandmother a house, too. Wow.

Amazing, Mercy.

This is The Ramsey Show. If you own a small business and you like The Ramsey Show, then you're going to love The Entree Leadership podcast. Almost 200,000 listeners tune in every Monday to hear me take calls from real business leaders and give tactical advice based on my 30 years of experience leading. This is not a podcast about business theory. It's real insight from a practitioner who actually does this stuff. Find it anywhere you listen to podcasts, or if you're listening on YouTube or podcast now, just click the link in the description. For those of you on YouTube and on podcast, this will be our last segment for the day. You can pick up the other segment that we're going to do on the Ramsey Network app, and you can join it for free. Just go to Ramsey Solutions or go to download the Network app on Apple or Google Play or whatever, and you can join it free, and you listen to all the show, or you can listen to the last segment, whatever you want to do. It's all there for free from the Ramsey Network app. You can also enter a question. This question comes from the Ramsey Network app.

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All right, the question is from Brianna. It says, I was one month for my lease being up and I had to leave early due to a domestic violence It's an incident. I notified the property management company and sent them the email with proof of the protection order, but just the other day, I went to check my credit and they put a $4,000 debt into collections. I'm appealing it, but if that doesn't work, should I just pay it?

Okay. What happened to you is wrong and horrible, but it does not release you from a lease. A protection order does not get you out of a lease.

You're appealing to their mercy at that point.

Yeah. If they want to let you out, if you were one of my tenants, I would let you out. But you can't just send them the email and go, I'm out. It's not a get-out-of-jail free card, no pun intended. You are liable for that last month. I don't know how it got to $4,000 for one month. You had one month left on the lease, and now they're going to $4,000. I'm not sure what flip were you renting.

Or they added a bunch of fees.

Yeah, or something, or maybe the bozo stayed behind, torched the place. I don't know. I don't know what happened here, but you are still liable, even though you had a protection order, even though you sent an email. This is not a one-way thing where you just go, Oh, I'm out. No, you're not out unless they choose to let you out and they didn't respond. You don't have a response from them, or at least you didn't mention it if you do, saying, We're going to let you go. If you've got that response, then you owe zero because they said, We're going to let you go, so you're free. But I don't think you got that. I think you I just sent this to them and you thought that got you out. That's the way this is worded anyway. And it does not get you out. I'm not an attorney, but it doesn't get you out. What I would do, I don't know if you need to appeal it, I would just call the property management company.

I'd go in person.

If you're in the town, go over there and try to meet with a senior person and see if you can negotiate. You're going to have to pay some money because you just walked. You were in a horrible situation. You needed to leave. I'm not telling you you did something wrong, but the assumption that you made that it got you out of the lease was incorrect. You're going to owe some money. Now, you got to go figure out what and what you can settle it for. If it's a $4,000 of legitimate charges or a bunch of them that are just beefed up or whatever, you might settle it for that equal to that one month's rent. But you're going to end up paying something, I think. I don't think the judge is going to go, Oh, well, you protection order. You don't have to honor your contract. It's like saying, I got a protection order, so I have to pay my car payment. No, that's not how it works. Sorry, you're going to end up paying something, Brianna. The sooner you can get to somebody and get a settlement negotiation begun, you're better off to do it in person and you're better off to do it with the actual people, not the stupid lawyers.

But if you can get that pulled off, that's going to be your best route because you're not going to get out of Dodge on this without paying something. Joe's in Chesapeake, Virginia. Hi, Joe. How are you? Hey, Dave. How's it going? Better than I deserve. What's up?

So beginning of this year, my wife and I decided to take our debt seriously, and now we have paid off $30,000 in student loans and credit card debt.

Good for you.

Mostly from my job, and I've been fixing and flipping lawnmowers, trucks, equipment, tractors, all kinds of stuff.

Cool. How much How many you made doing that? Honestly, normally about $4,000 to $5,000 a month. Wow! Good for you. You're good at this. Yes, sir.

I've been working hard. I'm a caterpillar mechanic. That's my career.

I just buy what I can and fix it up. Well, you know how to turn a wrench. Good for you, man.

Yes, sir. My question is, I'm at the point where I need to start my emergency fund, three to six month emergency fund. Good. I've been looking at the high yield savings account, and I see that the rate of return is the one I found that I applied for was 5.31 %. My mortgage, I only owe 119 on it, the house that we built ourself, and the interest rate on that is 4.3 %. So my question is, why should I not just put all of my income into the high yield savings account as long as the rate of return is greater than the interest owed. And once I reach the full amount- Because if you make 1% on $100,000, it's $1,000.

You don't have a $1,000 problem. You have a $119,000 problem. The secret to paying off your mortgage is not making 1% spread on a high yield savings account. The secret to paying off your mortgage is do what you do with the $30,000 and to pay off your mortgage. Okay. The actual math of this theory that you're running won't buy you a biscuit.

Okay.

That's what I'm saying. You're making more money on tractors than you'll make on this in a week. You follow me? Yes, sir. If you got 100,000 at 5% and 100,000 at 4%, the spread is 1%. 1% of $100,000 is $1,000 per year. You make that in a week, flipping tractors. It's not enough to screw with. Just pay off your mortgage. Get your emergency fund done, and then go ahead and go through the baby steps four, five, and six, and you'll be in great shape, man.

I like to take that thousand bucks and divide it monthly.

Eighty-three dollars.

That's your sleep tax, and you'll more than make that back.

Eighty-three dollars a month.

To sleep deeper than you've ever slept in your life because nobody can take your house away.

Yeah, just pay it off as fast as you can. Just nail it, hammer it, do it, do it, do it, do it. Don't mess around with it. Don't play games. Good for you. Good question. All right, Sam's in Syracuse. Hi, Sam. How are you? I'm good, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up?

Hey, so I feel like it's a dumb question, but…

You're in the right place. I have been.

A couple of dumb guys. We got you.

Hey, so I've been with my girlfriend now for almost a little over a year. I accumulated a large sum of debt before I got with her while I was in the military. I want to move forward with our relationship. We've discussed it for the last two months or so. I have the money set aside for the ring.

How much?

About 3,500 bucks.

How much in debt do you have?

I would say it's roughly around 50,000.

What's it on?

It's a few things. One of them is a credit card, which is 25. One is from a repo from a previous relationship.

What do you make a year?

I make about 65 a year, I would say.

I call on about- You're 24? 4,200. 26. 26, okay. Almost like I've done this before. Okay. You're saying you want to wait to get out of debt to get married?

That's the thing. I've heard a few different answers to that question that I have.

Unless they're this answer, they're wrong. The correct answer is get married.

Okay.

If you're pledged to get out of debt, and she's pledged to get out of debt with you, and you're aligned and in agreement on your money, get married.

That's one of the big reasons why I fell in love with her.

I was very open and honest with her. Don't tell her, I think I've got 50,000 Tell her I have $49,462 in debt, and it's exactly this, and this is exactly what I'm going to do to get out, because I'm the man you want to marry because I'm getting this done. I'm a go-getter. That's who you to be. Don't give me, I think I make, I think I'm in debt. Get it exact and kill it. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, you're still here? What are you doing? You do know that the rest of today's show is playing right now over on the Ramsey Network app, right? All you got to do to finish the episode is search Ramsey Network in the App Store, Google Play Store, or just click the link in the show notes to download the app for free. Yep, you heard me right, for free. Then right there on the home screen, you can watch the rest of today's show. Bada bing, bada boom. All right, I'm getting out of here. Enjoy. We'll see you on the app.