Transcript of Kelly Bensimon: From Controversial Reality TV Star to Real-Life Powerhouse

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Even today, 15 years later, after being on Housewives, people are constantly telling me how ugly I am, how stupid I am, how awful I am, what a terrible person I am, how self-centered I am. Have you met me?

Wow.

I went on Housewives because I had recently got divorced. I was very young, and I had to raise two children. When you're a financial provider, you're not like, I'm just going to sit home and just provide and wait for someone to provide. I didn't have that luxury.

There are two types of people in this world, Kelly. In your opinion, what are they?

Sharks and bottom feeders or sharks and minnows.

Now, give me explanation here because I think there's a good explanation behind this.

Minnows can become sharks. I mean, not in the obvious world, but in the business world, a minnow can learn all the tricks of the trade and become a shark. But there are problems. Sometimes minnows, there's problems because there are a lot of them, and they're trying so hard. And the sharks are just the ones that rise to the and just take over the universe.

I completely resonate with this, right? Because the reason why this question is so impactful is because we all start in this specific instance, we all start as a minnow. We can grow and grow and expand. As you're giving that explanation, I'm going through my own journey. I'm like, Oh, I really like that breakdown.

I mean, we have to understand that minnows are not going to be sharks. Let's just make that.

Yeah, especially in today's landscape, we got to make sure everybody knows that a minnow can't turn into a shark.

Right. Just about to make sure that's clear. But for the sake of my metaphor.

Before the slews come out. Before the slews came out.

I was like, I can explain everything?

Okay. Now you do. Minnows cannot be sharks, correct?

But for the sake of my metaphor, I'm up here and you're down there.

I just want to clarify, this is for entertainment purposes only.

But I think that One of the most important things about minnows and sharks is that there are a lot. We said before, there are a ton of minnows, and there are very few sharks. You can become a shark 100%. You just have to get out of the minnow mindset. So you can be one of many or you can be one of one. That's not my choice. That's your choice.

I love the one of one because everybody, as they're a minnow, thinks they have to be like somebody else. I was guilty of that. I thought I had to be somebody else or talk a certain way or give a certain energy or opinion based on what was working for somebody else. And as this When this thing went on, I saw this massive roadblock, and I'm like, What is it? Then for me, it was just about settling into myself and executing the gifts that I had. I think that's a great point as people ascend to the next level in a different stage.

Wait, Sean, that is really astute. Tell me, can you give me an example of a situation?

Yeah, for sure. It started as a Facebook group. When I started, it started as a Facebook group. And when I started, it is when I did 75 Hard, I don't know if you know who Andy Frisela is, but he's the CEO of First Form International, the biggest online supplement company, and he's viral. He has a lot of controversial things. So I thought I had to be that hustle culture that he was and speak loudly and energetically and in your face. And there's an aspect of me that can pull that off, but it's not my core beingness. And so at the very beginning, it was like I was a parrot. I was just echoing of maybe how he would say it or what he felt was important. And after a while, when I started to settle in, I realized, this isn't me. This isn't hitting the right way. When I got myself right and started to double down on what my actual strengths were, then that's when I started to really experience some exponential growth. I just think it's also everybody talks about focusing on your weaknesses. I think there's some danger in that. What I decided to do is I'm going to take what I'm really good at, I'm going to get it as good as humanly possible, and then I continue on that trend to really get better at what I do best.

That's all I can do. That's all I can control.

I love that. I think that you're super correct about people focusing on weakness. For some reason, we are in a labor laser-focused, weakness culture. I was raised in the Midwest, corn-fed and raised by a father who came from nothing. Education was paramount. He would always tell was to be laser-focused on what we were good at or we are good at. I raised my kids with that. As a single parent, there's only one voice. It's my voice. I just was speaking to my youngest daughter today, and I said, however you want to present yourself is how you want to present yourself. Do you want to present yourself as a leader? Do you want to present yourself as a solution-based person? Do you want to present yourself as someone who innovative ideas? Do you want to present yourself as a game changer? Do you want to present yourself as the listener who can help move the needle? But these are all positive, focused mindset, totally different than... I don't think you should focus on your weaknesses because that's not going to move the needle. People aren't like, Wow, you really, really aren't good at baseball. Let's make you play baseball.

You're really good at football, but let's make you play baseball.

It's not how it works.

Kelly, you make a great point. You're talking about laser focus, right? And being in a laser focus society that we're in because there's so much going on, you've done so many things, and you've been effective and brilliant at all of them. You were on season 2 through 4 of Real Housewives of New York. You are a model. You have transitioned to being an ambassador and influencer for wellness products and companies of such. You're a badass realtor that has also been featured on selling New York a couple of different times. There's a lot going, Oh, in all your hobbies and being a mom. Let's be honest, there's been things that have gone on in your life over the last 5, 10 years that could have derailed anybody that didn't have that focus. What I really want to do right now is paint the picture for the audience Maybe some strategies on staying focused so that you can be so damn dynamic.

I think the operative word is derailed. Whatever has happened in my personal professional life, I wasn't raised with the option of getting derailed. I've always said, I was never raised that it's okay to not work hard, work smart, Try to do better, be kinder, be more proactive. I just wasn't raised like that. I wasn't raised to talk about how bad life was or the situations that were happening. I was raised to find the solutions not only for myself, but to help my friends and people who I trust, help them with solutions so we can work together. I believe in a team. No one person does... Anyone that says that it's just one person on an island that's not true. You always have different people around you, just choose to bring them along or not. I think that being derailed is something that was just never in my vernacular, just never something that I didn't have the luxury of being able to have that or be like that or think like that.

I love that because what we're talking about is mental toughness and grit and an amazing and unshakable mindset. We all have shit that goes down in our lives. We all do. We can have moments of being derailed. I think at some point, everybody has this moment. Okay, I got to take a step back and I got to evaluate this and maybe find a pivot. But what we cannot do is give up from the mission. I just think there's too many people right now that are giving up on what they want because of somebody else's voice saying that they can't do something. I had this comment, though, that conversation yesterday with Cathy Ireland. She was saying that there's people that are always going to tell you you can't do something. We're going to do listen? How many people made fun of me for doing this? I mean, are there any more do she things than quitting an amazing sales career in the medical business to start a podcast? I don't know. I don't know. They make fun of people like me.

First of all, that's amazing. Congratulations. And it takes a lot of confidence to make a big decision like that. I mean, that's awesome. I think that even today, 15 years later, after being on Housewise, people are constantly telling me how ugly I am, how stupid I am, how awful I am, what a terrible person I am, how self-centered I am. Have you met me?

Wow. I've been on the- I'm like all the things that I am not. I know multiple. It's so It's funny because I never judge anything based on what I see on reality TV. I know I have plenty of friends that were in reality shows that were produced to look like an absolute villain, and they're the kindest, most loyal individuals I've ever been friends with. But it's so funny because when you look at all that, when you look at the exposure, how are some... Because listen, let's be honest, there's people in this world that will have one person tell them one thing. I don't think you can make it or you don't have what it takes. It could be a boss, but you literally have the keyboard warriors and the armchair quarterbacks telling you things about you that aren't true. After 10 minutes of this conversation, I can already tell you that nick D is correct, and everybody who knows you, that is just you're an amazing person, and they don't know who the hell you are.

No, they don't. But that's okay because That was a part of my life that was really fun. I went on housewives because I recently got divorced, and I was very young, and I had to raise two children. When you're a financial provider, you're not like, I'm just going to sit home and just provide and wait for someone to provide while I'm waiting to provide. It just doesn't work like that. I I would love to be able to, again, I would love to have been able to sit, regroup, figure out what I was going to do. I didn't have that luxury, so I had to shift gears immediately. I was offered an opportunity to be on Housewise. I was offered an opportunity to do something else, another show. Then the executive producer was like, We need to legitimize this brand. We'd love to have you on. I was like, Why not? Yeah. Normally, because I'm writer, I'm always checking things out. I don't dive deep and find out people's deepest, darkest secrets, but I do like to have an overall understanding of who they are, just as out of respect. Hey, I saw you did this, or I know you did that.

I didn't do that when I was on Housewives because I was like, This is supposed to be reality, and I want people to see the real me. I thought people were going to be like, Oh, my God. I can be like her, too. I can come from Rockford, Illinois, and model, and work hard, and try to make hay while the sun shines, and explore and celebrate all these incredible people But no, they were like, That's what you do? I'm like, Yes, that's what I do. They're like, Oh my God, how awful. I can't believe you are curious and want to do things to help other people.

That's awful. Yeah. It's amazing to me how people can be perceived by watching a TV show. That is spoiler, guys, for entertainment purposes.

I think, too, that they didn't like the fact that I was a single parent. The fans were not ready for that. I know that everyone... I know that they weren't ready for it. 2009, they weren't ready for for a woman like me to be single and to be working hard. It didn't make sense. They're like, Why is she working hard? Why doesn't she just marry someone rich? I'm like, Well, why don't I I come from the Midwest. I come from a core, strong value system. Why wouldn't I want to do well? Why wouldn't I want to be revered for the things that I do well and have a around me and say, Oh, my God, that's so great. No, they were like, That's not how it works. Just get married.

Well, they're forgetting that one size doesn't fit all. I want to ask you because there was an opportunity for me to comment on something in Us Weekly about this type of subject. I think there's a double standard here. I think it's a double standard. I want to hear your thought on that because Because do you feel that if it were the real house, men of New York, would anybody give pushback on the man being single and being driven and successful and wanting to do it on their own. There's a double standard here.

No. They would be like, He's a baller. Look at him. He's killing it. He's the Tom braided of housewives. He's the GO. But I'm like, oh, my God. Something must be wrong with her. Something really must be wrong with her that she's educated and works hard, looks like she does, raising two kids by herself. And by the way, this whole idea of marrying a billionaire, if I were a billionaire, the last thing I'd want is some person who is thinking they're the shit. I want to be with someone who's an amazing human. I don't need to be with someone arm candy. That's not going to move the needle. At the end of the day, when the lights go down, Sean, you need someone that you can talk to and that has empathy and that is curious and that is And that had genuine baseline kindness.

Very well said. I mean, that's what everybody's shooting for. That's the real measuring stick of a relationship. I hope so. I mean, you would think, right? You would think that you would need to be. I hope so. Yeah. So let me ask you a question. So when all this stuff started coming out and seeing how Joe Public or the viewers had their opinions of you, how did that impact you mentally? Because I would have to think the first time. The first time anything came out, there's this massive kick in the stomach. I want to tell a quick story. This is why I asked. I was on Here's Morgan. I think it was in February or March. It was the first time I was on his show, and I got torched on X on YouTube that I was a covert feminist because I was happy that my wife was happy in her career in teaching. I got completely blasted. I got called a simp. I got called a bunch of different things. Basically, your wife should be home raising the kids, and you should be out doing this. I'm like, Wait, hold on, what year is it?

Why is it now that I actually support my partner in doing this? In that moment, I called Val. I said, What do I do about this? I'm getting torched. She goes, Welcome to Fame. You just deal with it. I'm like, So I don't respond? She goes, No, don't do that. But for me, that was my first time. I remember I was at high school, I think, a lacrosse game with my wife and my kids, and I was sweating already because it's Florida. But this internal heat, I'm like, Oh, my gosh, they hate me. They hate me.

Sean, sorry. I'm sorry. It's interesting because when I was on Housewives, I had this amazing publicist. I was working in the fashion business, so I obviously knew the right tool for the right job. But when I was going on television, I wanted to have a great publicist that could really help move the needle. Didn't know what was going to go on, but I knew that you have to have a team. Always have to have a great team with you. So I had this amazing publicist, and they said, Don't say anything. You're going to be on the cover of Playboy. You're not going to say anything because you are going to be doing all these different things. And I'm like, This is not the show. You're letting these other people have this narrative, and I'm not able to actually say anything. So finally, when I left the show, I just was like, I let everybody... They're on the talk shows, they're on their Instagrams. I'm like, silent. Then I'm like, You know what? I'm going to go to this beautiful charity event, and I'm going to celebrate the charity, and I'll talk about it there. Everyone was like, Why did you wait here?

I'm like, Because I'm at a charity event. Let's talk about how great this charity is. Then we could talk about why I'm going to be moving on from Housewives. Everyone was like, What?

Here. You did it here.

I love it. No, I got this. I think it's better to celebrate the misfortune and to be able to talk about what I'm doing and celebrate them and package that than just to be randomly talking about myself, which was the total opposite of who they thought I was. They just didn't know. They just didn't know. But I'm sorry you got torched, but I'm glad you Hey, it is what it is.

It was one of those things that I hadn't been yet. It was my first taste, and now it was a really good crash course, I'm going to tell you right now, because now when things happen, I just go, far for the course. I'm not everybody's flavor of ice cream. I'm never going to be. It's so funny because we deal with these things as creators. A lot of times we're measured by, for me, how many show listens a month? What are my rankings and my ratings and everything? I looked at my wife the other day, I'm like, On Apple, I dropped from five stars to 4. 9. Look at all these one stars. There's no explanation. I go, This is crazy. She goes, That comes with more listens, Sean. That's going to happen. You are not going to be for everybody. That's also very good because if there can start to be some discourse about you and things like that, you're going to catch hate. You just got to be ready for it. I I'm starting to feel it. I really, really am, and I'm prepared, finally. But the haters are part of the equation, too.

You can't have lovers without haters. The haters are the ones that are going to fuel you to be better because they're going to say, Hey, Sean, here's a pop-up of something that I didn't like. Then that's an opportunity for you to say, Hey, you didn't like this? Let's explore that. How would you have known about that I never saw it like that. Maybe because, again, because I'm a writer, I'm always looking at the whole story. I was always like, Oh, my God, they got something there. There must be something in there. Let's see what they want. Then they were like, Wait a minute, you're asking us questions? You're asking me what you can do better? That's what we're supposed to be doing here. I'm like, No, no, no, no.

That's what this is all about. This is real life. This is real conversation. This is called You're helping me grow.

I know you don't want to. I know you want me to be ugly and old in the corner, but we're going to grow together, whether you like it or not.

It's funny when I always get these criticisms in a comment or something like that. There was one recently, the girl had a great point. She was like, I really love this clip. This is all very true, but there's a lot of F-bombs in it. There's not a whole lot on my show like that any longer. The guest was going there, and I don't I just said to her, I remember her name. Her name was Angela. I said, Angela, thank you so much for your comment. I completely understand where you're coming from, and I do not disagree. I'll do my best to get better with that. I want you to be able to share this. It's so nice. It's disarming because you know what? There's multiple things that have gone on. Someone on my show commented, said, This guy says like too much. I love his content, but if I hear the word like again, I said, You know what? Thank you for that. I didn't notice it. But now that I do, I will work intensely on removing those. I think I've done a good job with it.

Sean, people say that to me as well. They would say, If you're so smart, why do you always say like? Well, we say like because we're giving ourselves a mental pause to think. Instead of just having this space or the air, we're using a word, There's nothing wrong with that. You can use all the time. It doesn't make you less smart, doesn't make you less mindful, doesn't make you less talented. It just means that you are being respectful of other people and putting in a word so that they don't feel an awkward silence.

I don't disagree with you.

I've got all the answers.

You do. Gosh, I need you next to me all the time. I'm like, Hey, Kelly, what do I say here?

I'm going to say, Sean, you're so great.

My hype girl, let's go. Let's go. No, I appreciate it. Last week, let's talk about some more crazy things that you're doing. Last week, you had modeling show, you were jamming, you were jet set, and you have a very busy life. Walk us through the modeling and everything that's going on with you right now.

I used to say I wear many hats, but I think that's so tacky. It's like, I wear many hats.

Well, it's cliché, but it's curious.

I do a lot of stuff. Yeah, you do a lot of stuff. You're moving. I'm a curious person. But I'm also a prepared person. When someone says to me, Hey, I have a brand. What are your thoughts on our brand? I'm not just throwing spaghetti at the wall and spewing out nonsense. I think to myself, That's such a great brand. There's so many things that resonate, and what are those things? I think that's one reason why I'm a good ambassador for a lot of these wellness companies is because I'm very, very real. I may not be showing you my blood, but I'm very real about my experiences. I think that's one reason why I resonate so well. I'm just honest. A lot of people just say, have this narrative, and I don't have a narrative. My I'm ever-changing. I'm constantly in a state of learning, and I always want to be better, and I don't want to be stuck with my narrative is X, my narrative is Y, because I want to be able to evolve and I want to be able to grow. And again, all of that authenticity, that genuine, real, not bullshit housewives authenticity, but that real core authenticity just resonates with people.

I've been able to do all these different things, talk about my psoriasis on social media, where something that I never wanted to talk about. I was always hiding it. When I was on the cover of Playboy, my ex-husband was my photographer because I didn't want anyone else to see my psoriasis. As much as I love and hate him, he's mine to love and hate. I knew that he wouldn't exploit something that would make me feel really, really bad about myself. It became a celebration of being 40 and not a cover up of having psoriasis. I've had a lot of unusual experiences. For me, social media has been a game changer because whether I'm showing the most luxurious apartments in the world or whether I'm talking about something that's very heartfelt, I'm able to communicate in a way that resonates. It's been really powerful. I mean, even on my I have a podcast, an iHeartRadio, I Do Part Two, and talking honestly about dating in your 50s and that next chapter and what that looks like, I've had such a really warm welcome because I'm real. I'm not trying to give you tricks, not trying to show you how great I am.

I'm just talking honestly about what's happening and how it's happening. And it's been great. It's been great.

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I never want to be the individual that is not relatable. I want people that have never met me to truly know me. That's what I shoot for here. That's why these conversations are not scripted, they're not calculated. They're open conversations because when I have amazing guests on like yourself, I want the people that are listening and watching to truly get a feel for who you really are and what you have done and how you focus on a day-to-day to do the many things that you do. Authenticity.

It really is. For anyone out there who thinks that there's a trick or just because sometimes we say, Here's one issue, two issues, three issues. Everything isn't packaged in one, two, and three. You really have to go through things and you have to be around people that you trust, and you have to be able to talk to people that you trust. Whether that's your friend group or your social media platform, you have to be able to be open and personally available to be better and to make real change in your life.

Very well said. Wise, my friend. You're so wise. This is wild, Kelly. It's wild. Let me ask you another question. We've talked about some of the properties that you show. You have some big luxury listings right now. I know as of six months ago, you were looking to sell your New York house. Did that sell? Are you still in it? What's going on?

I rented that because the market just shifted. And so I decided to my whole mindset in real estate is all about generational wealth. And what is generational wealth? Putting money in your pocket. So sometimes if the market does not lend itself to selling, then renting an apartment or putting money into people's pockets is just a better and safer way for people to actually make astute decisions on what they want to do rather than just feeling like they have to sell something. A little money goes a long way, and money brings people a lot of freedom. So You don't always have to just... I think that that's one big problem in the real estate market is that a lot of brokers feel like they have to sell. Well, if you have to sell, you're never going to be successful. You want to find that perfect place for that person. You want to listen to what their needs are. Hey, I need to put some money in my pocket. Great. Let's rent it for a while. Let's put it at a higher price. Let's put it on the market for a short period of time. Let's make strategic decisions so that we can together build a relationship and a rapport where you can trust me.

I love that. And that's one reason why I do well in this business. It's not because I've got long hair, not because I smile. It's because I'm super strategic with my clients, and I listen to what their needs are, and I am able to manipulate certain things because I have a team of really good people that I defer to, like lawyers and educated humans that are making real decisions, everyday real decisions, and not just people that are just trying to sell something to somebody. It's just a different mindset. I operate differently. I'm not afraid, I'm not scared. I know that I can do certain things in a certain way. It may not be the time that you want, but I know I can do things in the right way.

I love that you're solution-oriented. I try to be- Because there could be two... I mean, it's just... But that's the thing. You wanted to sell your property in New York. It wasn't selling because the market shifted so badly. Okay, I'm going to rent it. There's solutions. Instead of being focused on what's not happening for you, focus on what you can do in the interim until you can get that ultimate situation to happen. Happen. But too many people let the lack of what's not happening control their mindset and quite honestly, how they impact their day and how they live and really how their quality of life, let's be honest.

I think, too, Sean, working with Anna Wintour at the Met, writing American Style for her was a game changer for me. And the reason that it was a game-changing moment for me is because I learned who we are as Americans, why we're so successful, and where we're going in the future. Most people are just focused on this right now. Everyone It's like, My boyfriend for right now, my life for right now, my apartment for right now. I learned about the most innovative humans and what they did and how they did it. And so that's how I think. I think There's going to be these bumps in the roads, but there's been amazing icons in the past who took major risks, and they weren't like, Wow, I'm not going to be able to do X right now. They just took those risks, and they became the next masters of the universe. And so I'm okay with taking risks and working with the best of the best so that the risks that I'm taking are They're not random risks.

I really like that because when- You're just all the time showing gorgeous. You're like, I really like that. I really like that.

You're getting inside of me that no one ever hears.

I love that. No, and that's great. That means this is going well. It means that the conversation is open. That's what I love bringing... That's what I love selfishly about these conversations is when I I can do that because it provides a better connection, a better conversation, and then the audience can enjoy it better. But you're talking about speed bumps, it drives me up a freaking wall when someone has an idea or it could be something within the family. It doesn't matter what the situation is. And a speed bump hits and everybody pushes the panic button, freaks the F out. It's like, Wait a second, guys. Did We not think that at any point in time, we were going to have any type of universal resistance or external resistance or some type of issue or landmine sitting right in front of us that we have to fix or disarm before we move forward. It drives me crazy. Those are opportunities to get better.

Yes. But those are weaknesses, Sean. Someone's opening a door and saying, I need help. What are your thoughts? It's not weakness.

No, that's strength in my humble opinion.

Yeah, love that.

I told my team before the call today. I mean, before our interview, I go, Guys, I need help. I need more help. I need help in X, Y, Z, and let's go hire someone to do it, and let's do it within the next 90 days.

But you also know who to ask. You're not just randomly saying like, Hello, I need help.

You Can someone help me in your own?

You have a team around you, you have people that you trust who could help you make those decisions. That's key.

That's the fun thing about it because I look at it and you're talking about the team. I have a whole ass team, and it's not just my executive team. I have a great production team. I have a great publicist. All these things are working together.

You have a great family.

I have a great family. Oh, my wife is backbone of this thing. Without her belief in me, we wouldn't be here because she'd be like, You You are not quitting your job. You are not retiring from corporate America, dude. You're 45 at the time. You're not doing that. But without that, this isn't where it's at right now. So again, the risk factor. If it's out there and you feel it, you got to take it. And you got to take it in stages. And I took it in stages. But speed bumps, man, those are something that I think people need to embracing instead of running from. It's interesting because last year when I called off my wedding, which I thought people were just going to slam me for, I had to move out immediately.

My friends were really nervous, like what's going to happen? What are you going to do? It's just going to affect your business, all these different things. I just packed up my things and I moved. I will never forget the first night that I was in this new apartment, not this apartment, another apartment. I just thought to myself, This is the first day of the rest of my life. I am going to protect myself from now on.

That was a really hard decision to make for you. I mean, that for anybody.

I mean, I've been spending my life protecting everyone else, creating narratives for them, writing about them, celebrating them, doing everything for everyone else. It was the first time in my... Raising two children, educating them, making sure they had every single thing from knowing how to ski to second language is to whatever it is that they wanted to do. It was the first time in my life when I was like, I need to be laser-focused on my actual It was scary.

I bet you it was scary. By the way, I heard you, are you really fluent in French?

Oh my God, what did I just do?

The first day of your life, that's what it was. First day of the rest of my life. For the rest of your life, whatever the saying is. But is it true that you're fluent in French?

I am.

That's wild.

Yeah, everyone loves when they hear me speak French. How does that mean?

Go for it. Go.

She probably will say, I'm. What'd you say? The last time I did, probably, a Vectoire.

Wow. Thank you for that. That's amazing. It's amazing. Being bilingual is very important. My wife, she grew up in Ecuador. That's where she's from. We're really trying to get the kids to really dive into Spanish. That's something that I wish that I dove into further as a kid. I took three years Spanish. I think, I don't know my biological father very well, but my grandmother full on 100% fluent in Spanish. I'm Hispanic somewhere. It's important. It's a segue, guys. It's called getting sidetracked, which happens in a conversation.

I'm Hispanic somewhere.

I'm part of somewhere. I don't know what kind, but I always thought I was like, I want to do that DNA and me thing or 23 and me. But I think that was bad. I don't think that worked out very well for people.

No, it did not work out well for people. No, it didn't. Some people it worked out great. It's interesting because people are always like, Are you from Brazil? I'm like, I'm from Rockford, Illinois. I'm Irish Catholic. Yeah, but no, no, no. I have a twin brother. He's blonde hair and blue-eyed, and I am not.

I'm from Rockford, Illinois. Brazil. Are you Brazilian?

People are like, Where are you from? I'm like, Where do you think I'm from?

Oh, my gosh. That's crazy, isn't it?

I like to think of moments in terms of takeaways. I was raised in the Midwest. I was raised in an environment where we learned about the land of Lincoln and where history was super important to us and sports were really important to us and independence of being able to ride our bikes places and I was driving into Chicago to start modeling at 15 years old, and just there was a different mindset. One of my biggest takeaways from being raised in that experiment is that I had this fearlessness that everything was a possibility, that there was something out there that was going to be bigger and different and more interesting and more evocative, more provocative. I was just very, very curious about all of these interesting new things because I had this baseline. I had this baseline of love, culture, tradition, value. I could just go anywhere from there because I always knew if I fell back, it would just be this cloud of love, education, value. And so that takes you a long way. I think that when we were on Housewives, one thing that people didn't see, they didn't want to see me as a single mom.

They didn't want to see that I worked. They didn't want to see that I was educated. But we were all doing the same things just in a different way. I mean, every single woman on that show is educated, comes from a good family, comes comes from money, has possibility. Every single woman on that show, not one of us is poor or from a dysfunctional family. I mean, there was things that happened to people, but we all had a baseline. I think that's one of the reasons why people really love to watch us is because there was an understanding and that we were all in it together. We weren't trying to promote. One person was trying to promote, but we weren't trying to... It was more about how we felt, what we were doing, and how are we reacting to stuff. That made major TV.

I love it. Major TV. It did.

I just became a pop-up because they were like, There's no way that she works. No way. Come on. What does she read? Comic books?

Was that one of the comments? I bet you do, though. I bet you do have a comic books.

I do. Yeah, of course you do. I read comic books. Who doesn't?

Yeah, who doesn't? Come on.

Spider-man. But everyone comes from somewhere, Sean.

Sure. I mean, 1,000%. With that, everything that you've... The word curious to me is very impactful, and I want the audience to grab onto that word because that word can take you so far. Everything that I get involved in, it starts from a point of curiosity. I would also say, for people listening, is when you're about to get into a heated conversation or you think it's going to be heated and you want to just attack somebody, start out curious. Seek to understand what the point is and why they feel a certain way. Because what I found is when we can be curious and explore, we often agree on a lot more than we disagree on. Then we can get to different places and have a constructive conversation or a debate, whatever it is.

I used to say all the time, since 2009, Let's agree to disagree. I don't know where this is going. I don't know how valuable this conversation is going to be. Let's just agree to disagree. That's been my tagline since literally 2000. I mean, you have to say it before. For. Because when you're raising kids, you're just like, Okay, you're fine. Everyone's good. Everyone's going to be great. Everyone's going to be great. Let's just move forward. And it's true. I think that I appreciate you Coming from a place of curiosity, I think that's incredible. And I think that a lot of people just don't listen. They're just desperate to chat and get their point out, or their story out, or that narrative that they've created for themselves. Again, I told this at the top, and for the listeners, I don't have a narrative. Today, I may be fearless. Tomorrow, I may be petrified. Who knows what's going to happen? But I will tell you about it.

I love it. I love that, Terry.

It's getting real today.

Hey, shit's hot. It's hot right now. I don't know how I feel. I was good yesterday. Today, not so much. Why hot? Today, I am freezing cold. I'm not leaving this kitchen. I'm stuck right freaking here, and I'm going to have 17 cups of coffee today. That's all I'm doing. That's it. I have those days. I love those days, though, because it gives me a chance to slow down a little bit. Okay, let's evaluate why I feel like shit today. What did I do last night? What did I eat last night? What did I consume? What did I read? What did I listen to? What did I watch? It's all But listen, life's also about hobbies. As we wind this down, I know you got a busy day.

Wind this down. You have some interesting moments. Wind this down. I'm having the best time ever. I'm ready to go.

Okay, let's keep it going. Block out the rest of the afternoon, guys. Cancel everything.

Shows like I got Hours with Kelly, Hours But Hours.

Hours with Kelly. That could be a spinoff show, Hours with Kelly. All of the Hours. You have some fun hobbies, though.

I do.

You're an avid equestrian. Now, what's a polo enthusiast? Now, are you playing polo or do you just like to go and rain?

I learned last year because after the unwinding of my relationship, I was like, I need to do something. It's interesting. My executive producer at iHeartRadio, Amy Sugarman, is like, You need to do something that is super challenging for you, that you just don't know if you can do. I was like, Okay, I'm I'm going to try Polo. I know how to ride horses, and I know some of the guys that play Polo, and it seems super aggressive, and I'm going to try just to do it. It's called Stick and Ball. You're on a horse and you're basically hitting the stick, the mallet, with the ball. It's very challenging. It's like, think about golf on a horse. These horses are small, and they're We were very feisty. It's been really, really fun. I'm not telling people. I'm not saying, Oh, my God, if you have an issue, something happens or there's a speed bump in your life, play polo. That's not an everyday- Sticken ball, baby.

Sticken ball. You're going to play stick and ball.

But maybe it's a metaphor. Maybe, yeah. Maybe, say, stick a ball is a metaphor for doing something out of the normal, out of the ordinary, learning something new, whether That's a language, piano, something that is out of your comfort zone to really redirect everything, whether that's your serotonin, whether that's your just general mindset. Whatever it is to bring new energy to something is going to help you move through all of whatever it is that you're feeling, you're thinking. The mind is a very, very, very powerful, powerful machine, and it can really do things that can be great, and it can do things that can really, really harm people. If we don't use that mind in the right way, it can really turn people to do things that are not good for them. I don't believe in self-sabotage. I believe in working through things the best way that I can. Sometimes, I don't know a better way than to use my body and use my brain to do something different.

That was great. Those would be called healthy coping mechanisms.

Oh, really?

Look at that. I think they're healthy. I know. Look at you. You're killing life. I'm a guy.

I don't even know this. I'm like, Wow, I'm doing a great job.

Hey, I'm doing good. It's good that you found out on a Tuesday. Now you got the rest of the week. You doubled down on that shit.

I have a really high healthy coping mechanisms?

Yes, very good coping mechanisms. Very good.

Just try to, again, you're a father and I'm a mother, and I'm just always trying to... At the end of the day, Sean, when I pass, it's going to say she was a great human and a great mother. It's not going to say she was on Housewise. It's not going to say she was on Playboy. It's not going to say she sells hundreds of millions of dollars of real estate. It's not. I'm not going to say she was a great human, and she handled herself well, and she understood people. That's the good news.

That's the good There's a very hard line between something that you do and who you are. I think we get lost in what we do and allowing that to label our identity instead of diving into who we are as people. As long as we continue to focus on who we truly are, because those are the things that matter to our families, to our children, to society, what are they going to say about you when you're gone? If it's, she was a real estate mogul, she was a reality TV star, that's a fail.

That is a fail. If they say she showed up, she was there, she had empathy, she supported her family, she did X, Y, or Z things that are about your value system, that's the good news. But people think that just because you're a shark doesn't mean you have to be a have to be valueless.

You don't have to be a mean shark. You just got to be a shark. I'm a shark.

Yeah, you are. You are a shark. You're so cool. I'm really impressed by you. I'm impressed by you. I'm impressed by your beautiful wife and your kids. I'm impressed. It takes a lot to First of all, you were talking about you're binge eating. I mean, no one would look at you and say, Wow, he's a binge eater. I mean, you're the picture of health. So first of all, that is so amazing that you opened up about that because men's health issues are real. Second of all, just talking about the ups and downs and the idiosynchrosies of family life. Everyone's like, I'm such a great mom. I'm so great. It's not about being this It's about being able to go through what we were talking about before, those speed bumps and saying, Okay, this person needs a little space, or maybe this person needs a little more encouragement. That's just all good news. Then to take the huge leap of faith.

Huge leap of faith.

You're like, Here you go, corporate world. Bye. Here you go, insurance. Here you go, life. Here you go, security. I'm going to go and do something that is totally different and something that makes me feel like the best version of me. And look where you are.

Yeah, and it's run on air. It's run on fiber optic cable. Think about that shit. Creating something from nothing. But again, I do evaluate myself consistently in this show and in this business, but more so as, how was I today as a father and a husband? Because those are the moments everybody else can think the world of you. But if you walk through those doors and those people there don't see you in the best light and don't think you're leading the right way, nothing else freaking matters.

You know how people are always talking about their kids? My kids are so great. My kids are the greatest kids of all greatest kids. But what they're actually saying is they're not talking about their kids. They're talking about how how great they were in parenting. You know what? People should be heralded for that. You've got a great child. They're a great student, they're a great athlete. They're doing well. They're a doctor, whatever it is. That's not slow clap stuff. That's like...

Yeah, it's the '80s slow clap shit. Let's get it.

That's like real. That's it. I do. That's where the money is. Those kids, those Those brains. That's where everything is. Everything else means nothing.

I love that perspective.

There are legacy, there are futures, they're the ones that are going to be the next game changers, and we have to put all of our time, effort, resources into them, just like you're doing.

Yes, and like yourself. But thank you so much for coming on today and having this amazing conversation. My God, I loved it. It was one of my favorite conversations in a long time. Very open, fun, playful, informative, for the audience. So thank you for bringing your absolute kick-ass A game.

Thank you. I appreciate that. I appreciate that.

Are there any other things that you wanted to... Again, I want to make sure that the audience knows where to find you. There's a lot of local audience. I know you have some stuff going on in, I think, Sarasota. You have a house that may be on the market. You want to talk about that briefly? Give them a place to find all this stuff.

Sure. You can find me on any social media, Kelly Benzimone, Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn, Facebook. You guys know where to find me. Everything that I do is always online. I work in real estate in three states, in New York, California, and Florida. I have a lot of beautiful properties in Florida right near you guys in Sarasota, Miami, Palm Beach. It's been so much fun celebrating this whole brave new world, and I'm just getting started. Then you guys can find me on my podcast. I do part two. If you're interested in learning about finding love, falling out of love, falling back in love, making sure that you make the right decisions when you're looking for love. It's all goodness.

I love that. Value, serving, just serving the people. Through your experience. I love that. Yes. Well, thank you again, Kelly. Make sure you hang out for a bit, but I'm going to tell the audience, I'm going to give them some instructions right now. And the instructions are, hey, if you love the show and you got something out of it and you know that You know somebody that would benefit from the conversation, send it to them. Please, that's the only thing I want you to do is share this episode with everyone you know, love and trust, and take the words very deeply. Everything we spoke about, there's a A lot of hidden meanings and a lot of outward meetings, too, that you can really take and apply to your life today. So until next time, guys. Stay determined. Rince takes your laundry and hand delivers it to your door. Expertly cleaned and folded. So you could take the time once spent folding and sorting and waiting to finally pursue a whole new version of you. Like tea time, you. Or this tea time, you. Or even this tea time, you.

Said you hear about Dave.

Or even tea time, tea time, tea time, you. So update on Dave. It's up to you. We'll take the laundry. Rince. It's time to be great.