Transcript of The Big Suey: The House of Dick

You're on vacation? We're here for you. With children? Who are on the back of the heat to debate as in the court? About which tablet is louder, which cable is faster, and why 100 times the same trick, to look at a basic car is? Yes, our cars have absolutely grown. Because regardless of road trip or business trip, when your flight has late, your battery is immediately given, or your hunger has to be fixed, what is still open. Yes, we are here for you. Enterprise, here for you. Enterprise, here for you.

Welcome to the Big Sui.

Presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast.

I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize for that.

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it. And now, here's the marching man to Nowhere, Fatface, and the Habitual Liar.

This episode of the Dan Levitard Show is presented by DraftKings. Draftkings, the Crown is yours.

The World Baseball Classic is great. Yesterday, a player on Panama tried to fight his own manager, and it wasn't the most hostile thing that came out of the world baseball classic. There are different dialects of Spanish. Not all Spanish is the same. Actually, the apology I'm about to make now is a couple weeks late because a couple of weeks ago, during a wrestling segment, we said something. A word was said that is a slur in Mexican, but in Cuban is just the word for slut. It's not a slur, but in Mexican, it's not... In Cuban, it's not a slur, but in Mexican, it is a slur. Randy Artros Arena, he was great in Tampa and has been less great in Seattle. He's a great player. But I've legitimately never heard the words you're about to hear in Cuban Spanish, where he makes the distinction of, I'm speaking one Spanish now, but now I'm going to speak Cuban Spanish. And he's talking about the big dumper, a very popular player and his teammate. I'm going to translate this for Zazlo when it's done. But it's legitimately shocking. When I heard this said of a teammate, I couldn't believe that it sounded so nice at the beginning when he's like, Well, his family, his parents are really nice.

But then he really tells the big dumper to go bleep himself. Listen to this.. Gracias a Dios. Hace dos días que los pude ver en el hotel y me fueron a saludar. Me dieron un abrazo y estaban muy orgulloso de mí de poder verme otra vez. Lo otro se lo quiero decir a los cubanos, se lo voy a decir. Él lo que tiene que hacer de verdad, de irse para casa de la pierna, a los mexicanos. Que se vaya para casa de la verga, en inglés. Se lo voy a decir en inglés. Él All right. So he starts with, Thank God for his parents. They're very well-educated. They met me in the hotel lobby the other day. They told me how proud they were of me. That's nice. Yeah, that was nice, but I'd like to do Refran Del Día with Tony here on La Casa del Pinga, which, first of all, he told him to take his Good to See You and shove it up his ass. That's not nice. This is a teammate of his. This is just legitimately crazy to hear. Let's play Refran Del Día with Tony here so you can hear where it is that Randy sent his teammate.

Dime lo mi gente! Wow. Randy. It's the first time that I've ever heard this phrase be uttered in a press conference or in some media availability, even if it was on a phone. About his teammate. About his teammate. I think it was in jest, though, Dan. I will give that to Randy. I think it was in jest. But he told the big dumper, Cal Raleigh, to which means basically you can go to the house of the dick.

That's what I thought it meant.

That's exactly what it means. So it means a couple of different things, even though you're saying beta a casa la pinga, that could be go to a very far away house of the dick because it may be very, very far, or just go to the house of dick because... Come on.

You know about the house of dick?

Jeremy, can you give me some context here? Was he fooling around? Was he just playing because they were smiling, Jim?

Look, he He was smiling, but he was clearly frustrated because the context for this is Randy O'Rosa-Raina goes up to bat and goes to shake Cal Raleigh's hand. Randy Rosarena playing on the Mexican team, Cal Raleigh, the catcher for USA, today. So he goes and sticks out his hand to shake his fellow Seattle Mariner's teammate's hand and Raleigh from underneath the mask just goes, Good to see you, and won't shake his hand. And this is two World Baseball classics in a row where this has happened with Team USA for Randy Oresana because he tried to stick out a fist bump for Will Smith, the catcher of Team USA. Last time, just look, these guys all play in the same lead together. He's trying to be a good guy. He's trying to be the good guy. Hey, what's up? Especially now with Cal Raleigh, his teammate, expecting like, look, It's one thing I can understand Will Smith going, Hey, man, we've played against each other in the World Series when I was on the Dodgers and you were on the race.

We've seen each other naked.

It's got a point.

House of Dick. But the thing that happens is that it seems like something that should just be an easy exchange. Even just give him the glove, whatever. Instead, afterward, again, I've never heard someone speak like this about anybody, let alone a teammate after a game.

I've heard a lot of people in Spanish speak this way about others. Not at all. Not at all.

Not on the record, Dan. You hear this at the clubhouse.

Walked through West 32.

I wasn't doing players. I've just heard all of that a lot in my life. I've never heard it publicly, one teammate to another- Casa La Pina is insane.

I've never heard that in all the Cuban, in everything. Nobody's ever said that before.

Can you guys tell me whether or not you think this explanation works for you? Enrique Rojas of ESPN That's what he says, that catchers have been afraid to shake batter's hands for fear they might get pine tar on the ball. They can get ejected from the game if that happens. That's the explanation because it's happened a couple of times now where the catcher is trying to go fist bump with somebody.

Yeah, fist bump. I'll get anything on him.

Give him a fist bump or the glove, even.

Just like, Hey, here. But hold on a second. So we've got two different things here. And lost in translation, we should be the show in America that can help Seattle and everyone else navigate whether this should be a giant controversy or just a little joke between friends.

It's a play on for me. When I saw the quotes in black and white, I'm like, Oh, man, this is This is a spicy meatball. Who make it a salad?

Who make it the salad?

I think Randy O'Rosanillo, he'd almost have to be... He knows that if he's being serious, he is starting a major, major thing. I have to believe that he's smarter than that, that he wouldn't, even if he was serious, that he wouldn't be trying to start a major thing with his teammate. I think either he's really angry with him or they're very close. I don't think there's an in I don't think anybody's really close to Randy Rosarena.

He's a strange guy. He has a reputation inside of baseball. I'm actually shocked he knows Cal as his teammate.

Can we please check in with anybody in Seattle who can explain to us? Because we should be the show that is more qualified to analyze, is it a joke or is it a giant controversy? Because these are, whether you think they're baseball stars or not, these are two baseball stars No, no, no.

Exclamation point. They're baseball stars. Cal, Big Dumper was a phenomenon.

That's not the one that made me put the stars with a question mark. You've been talking about Randy for years. No, I loved him with the raise. He was less good with Seattle. I thought he was going to help put Seattle over the top. I just don't think, even though... Look, he's one of my favorite Cuban baseball players ever, a free swinger. I went three years never figuring out how anyone ever got him out. I love him, and he's very good player. I don't think he might necessarily qualify as a star even in baseball.

Agreed. There's bigger names and bigger stars. I think just on the Dominican team, I can name five guys that are bigger than Randy. But the funny thing is, a lot of people are looking at this being like, Okay, wait a second. This guy who's Cuban, who's playing for the Mexican team, is trying to salute the guy who's on the USA team, who's also on his team in real life. It's just a lot of peg points of he can't play on the Cuban national team because he defected and he can't go back.

I think he defected through Mexico That is why he's playing for Mexico. Rules are lax. Well, I want to talk a little bit about the World Baseball Classic.

Nola Nerenado is Dominican now.

And one of the things- Puerto Rican.

That's a fine.

I was going to say, I didn't see him out there at BP.

That is a fine.

That is absolutely- That's a bad look. That is absolutely- That's a bad look.

That is absolutely- That is absolutely a fine. That is absolutely a fine. And you have to pay the fine, and we're being more diligent about making make sure that we pay the fines because the Fine Bucket now has sponsorship.

Yes, the Fine Bucket is presented by Money Lion.

Download the Money Lion app or visit moneylion. Com to learn more Money Lion.

Make money easy. What's that? Five bucks?

That is a $2 fine. Okay. You owe $2. I get that QR. I want to take you guys briefly, though, through a conversation about how sports get globalized in a way that has happened that is really cool. We have seen in basketball the way that the NBA reached out to the rest of the world, and in doing so, Yana Santetokumpo and Jokić and Luka have become legitimate stars. Wemby because the sport has gone global. I'm actually old enough to remember when the United States exported baseball to Japan and played exhibitions in Japan and how Japan used to get its ass kicked in these games because they were in the formative years of developing baseball. And culturally, this one's interesting to me, right? There are no Japanese basketball stars. There are no Japanese football stars. I don't know if there are many or any Japanese hockey stars, but Japan has the greatest baseball player who has ever existed because over the last 35 years, the sport has dominated that culture. The body types, right, aren't made for basketball and football. But maybe if the sport had been there for 35 years, a Shoheotani somewhere would appear in Japan and make it so that those sports would be the ones...

Japan is pretty good at soccer, okay? But generally speaking, the sports that require the giant physicality, give me all the Japanese football players that there are. But baseball, they've got the best baseball player has ever existed, and Japan can now beat us in baseball. I've seen the evolutions as, and it's a crazy evolution to see, to watch Japan not be any good at baseball, to watch the United States go over to Japan, play against Japan in early exhibitions, and Japan get trounced again and again and again. Over the last 35 years, they've caught up. They've made it just like internationally, the world has caught up to us in basketball once we exported the sport. Japan has absolutely caught up. Is Japan favored to win the World Series as they did, the World Base Classic as they did when Shohe Ohtani was both pitching and hitting home runs?

The US was favored, and I think DR might have even been second, but I'm going to look now at the ads on DraftKings.

Japan is plus 360. They're in third place right now for World Baseball Classic USA is minus 105, and DR is plus 340.

Quick break to tell you about a special Miller time I had with my good buddy, Mochette. Mochette Mochette texted me the other day. He said, Hey, what are you doing for the game? I said, I'm just on my couch right now doing nothing, enjoying it. He's like, Hey, do you want some company? I said, From you, Mochetta? Absolutely. Mochetta comes over to the house and I pull out the Miller light. Miller light made that casual hang. A memorable good Miller time with my good friend Mochette because Miller light brought us together. We took that first sip after we toasted our beers and we knew we made the right call. We watched the game. All of a sudden, we're standing up on our feet. Big threes are being drained, and white cans are being clanged. See times like these? That's exactly why Miller Light is my go-to. Clean, refreshing, easy to drink, brewed for taste with simple ingredients. The original light beer since 1975, and it still hits different for yours truly and his good friend Mochette. Cheers to legendary moments made with Miller Light. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlight. Com/dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3. 2 carbs per 12 ounces.

This episode is sponsored by Better Help. March is one of those months where we talk about celebrating women, and it's very, very deserved because when you actually look around, a lot of women in our lives are carrying a ton. Work, family, relationships, expectations nobody notices or sees. I started thinking about the women around me, my wife, my mom, my sister, my friends, my coworkers, people who somehow take care of everybody else while still trying to hold it together themselves. And it's a ton to carry. Therapy can be a place to put some of that weight down. It can help you figure out what's yours, what isn't, and how to set better boundaries so you're not running on empty all the time. Betterhelp works with fully licensed therapists in the US, and they handle the matching process for you. You fill out a short questionnaire, and if your therapist isn't the right fit, you can switch at any time with more than 30,000 therapists and over 6 million people served, it's the world's largest online therapy platform with an average of 4. 9 out of 5 session ratings. Your emotional well-being matters. Find support and feel lighter in therapy.

Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp. Com/dlb. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P. Com/dlb. Draftkings Sportsbook, the number one sportsbook for live betting, is built for March. The tournament is unpredictable, but the rewards are guaranteed, baby. And DraftKings is delivering some of the most generous rewards in the market. New to DraftKings, bet just five bucks and get 200 bucks in bonus bets instantly. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code Dan. That's code Dan to turn five bucks into 200 bucks in bonus bets instantly. In partnership with DraftKings, the crown is yours.

Gambling problem? Call 1-800 Gambler or 1-800 My Reset. New York, call 877-8 Hope & Why or text Hope & Why. Connecticut, call 888-789-77777 or visit ccpg. Org.

On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas, wage or tax pass-through may apply in Illinois.

21 and over in most states, void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. For additional terms or responsible gaming resources, see sportsbook.

Draftkings. Com/promo.

Limited time offer. Don Libtard. Come with me, Frank, here live from Metalog Media Studios here in Miami.

Stugatz. The Germans are advancing on France in World War II.

This is the Dan Levatard Show with the Stugats.

It is a little bit crazy to think of how it is, if you're old enough to watch just how the sport evolved because of the concentration culturally of the country on that sport, where anyone who wants to play sports culturally. Baseball is what it is you're going to try and chase because Ichiro and now Ohtani are your groundbreakers and your pioneers that made American baseball not the best baseball necessarily anymore, because you can say flatly, No one here listening to this disputes that Shohe Ohtani is the best baseball player to ever exist, given that he's Barry Bonds, but also pitches. There's no dispute on this, correct?

Absolutely not. The shame for Aaron Judge is he might be the greatest right-handed hitter I've ever seen. He might be genuinely having the greatest peak of any hitter ever. And yet, he won't go down as the greatest player of his generation because Shoheya O'Tani exists.

How long has Shohe been in the majors now? What, Six years, maybe? Does that sound right?

I think longer than that. I'll look now.

Because the point that I'm trying to get at is that's never happened before, right? Where you have a player who's been in the league for that short amount of time, and we're just giving the consensus greatest ever.

Well, what's never existed as well is somebody who hits like that and also throws 100 miles an hour.

Also eight years. Eight years. And he'll be doing it for longer.

What do you guys feel in general about the World Baseball Classic? Because I heard the blasphemy that Jeremy had where he was saying that it's better than March Madness when we've said March Madness is the greatest thing just because it's concentrated uniforms running up and down and your gambling money is running up down on a Thursday morning. You're watching the ACC tournament starts today, correct?

That's correct, Dan. I love conference tournament time. We got a banger in the Big 12 with their glass court. Did you see this? I did not. The court, yeah. They're basically playing on an LED screen in the Big 12. I don't believe you. Arizona State versus Baylor at 12: 30. I think college basketball is having a tremendous year. John Shier won ACC Coach of the Year. I guess he won it because he had to overcome the loss of Jay Lucas. I don't know what we're doing there. And the punch. Yeah, and the phantom punch.

Jim Bayheim was giving Jay Lucas the ACC Coach of the Year. Jim Bayheim was raving about Jay Lucas.

Yeah, Jay Lucas deserves it. I mean, yeah, I understand he lost the number one draft pick, and he had to overcome that adversity in getting possibly the number two overall draft pick the following year. It's Duke. What are we doing? Jay Lucas deserves it. Maybe he won National Coach of the year and lose in the ACC. That's a weird ACC thing that they got going on with their teams. But it's incredible. I don't want to knock the WBC. I am trying desperately to get into it. I like the WBC because the atmosphere translates. But get out of here with hyping this tournament up just yet. All you got is a crowd because these games are garbage. Garbage baseball games. There's been one good one.

The montage we just showed, showed a bunch of game-winning home runs where there were walk-offs and people celebrating at home playing.

You would loop the same one over and over again. 90% of them were all different.

Did you just make all Latin people the same?

See you.

You loop the same one.

I can't believe he's been in racism two days in a row.

It's not good. I don't need to see some of these nations try to play. God bless him, Chechia, the great middle reliever coming out of the pen. I don't need to see him 15 to zero.

Thank you. Roy, control your room. Get him out of here with his accidental racism. I can't finish a point? You're not after accidental racism.

Oh, I'm not going to the penalty box. Second It was one home run.

You got to get out of here.

You can't say- Are you telling me there were two good baseball games in this thing? I challenged you. There weren't two good baseball games.

I'm literally last- You guys challenged me. You got to get out of here. We don't have challenges in a building. I defied you. Yes, but there were two good games in the 12th.

Hey, put on FS1. Israel's losing by 16. Out of here.

He was right about that. I was at the DR Israel game, and it got ugly quick. Come on.

What did you expect?

No one needs to see that. Tatees Hit a grand slam right to my section, though. Yeah, what'd you expect?

Come on. Hold on. What does almost caught the ball mean?

Six rows down. If I wanted to go get it, I could have gotten it. But the problem is I was... You know when you're in left field, where you see where the bar is on top, and then you have that little section in left field, there's the part there with the band sits. Jeremy would know. The band sits up there. I was right there on that ledge where the handicap, you go with the wheelchairs.

So I was there. I don't think we're saying handicap anymore. You did get scared. I was just like, did he get scared?

No, I was going.

No, you got handicapped. You know what? I'm sorry. Oh, no. I'm sorry to do this. Minor penalty, two minutes, rambling. Rambling? It should be worse. I don't have here. Use the wrong word in 2026. What's the right one? Well, it's not handicapped anymore.

I even don't know. And I'm a snowflake.

I almost caught it, though. If I wanted to, I would have gotten it.

Get out of here.

Accessible?

I don't think we're using that as the word anymore. I want to get a little bit caught up here on some of the football moves because I just saw to Zaz's point earlier in the show about some names that are moving around, getting giant dollar amounts that he does not recognize. Getup just put on the screen all of the tens of millions of dollars the raters have spent to try and fix everything on the first day of free agency. I don't think ever works as. I really don't think. The Patriots for 20 years always set out the first day of free agency because it was only the losers who were doing what the raters are doing. But the Raiders went in big yesterday signing a whole bunch of guys when they don't have a quarterback at the moment, although people think they're going to take Fernando Mendoza, and they are in a world of hurt. I want to play with the group here a game of big signing or not a big signing. And all of you were making fun of Mike Evans. I'm remiss in not making more fun of Tony from last week because he had a top five list of top five low-key free agent signings, and Mike Evans was on it, and Kenneth Walker, the Super Bowl MVP, He was on it.

Those can't be low-key. Mike Evans has a thousand- I'm not under the radar. Mike Evans has a thousand yards receiving- We thought he was done last year. But he's got a thousand yards receivings in every season of his career.

That's why I called it low-key.

But what- Ken Kenneth Walker was just a Super Bowl MVP. How can that be low-key? How is that low-key?

Because if they really cared about Kenneth Walker, they would have resigned him. They didn't care. Now he goes to the Chiefs. It was a low-key signing because how do you let the MVP of the Super Bowl walk?

Roy, can we put on FS2, Great Britain just cut to eight.

I can't believe you're dismissing what Czech electrician, Andre Sottoria, did today. Four and two-thirds scoreless innings against Japan. The guy is an electrician. He's smaller than me. His fastball barely breaks 80 miles an hour. Last time around, he struck out Shoheya Tani. That's the coolest shit in the world.

He was throwing slup.

It's not. I just told you, they're playing basketball on an LED screen today at 12: 30. I reclaimed my time.

That's got to be dangerous, right? I rec claimed my time. This is really cool to get to watch. It is way better than watching a 16 seed lose by 70.

Before we get to this big signing or not a big signing, because I do want to get people caught up on this. I wanted to see if you guys had any opinions on this because you know I'm interested in the rise of the information broker in the NFL, the Schefters, the Ian Rappaport, the Jay Glazers. I'm fascinated by it because of what a mental health challenge it is to the robots who have to do this and have their life both get more lucrative but crazy because they don't have any time to themselves. They have to follow everything. But I don't know how the audience at large feels about Mike Florio. He seems to suffer some of what I suffer from, which is you can be right, but you make your point so obnoxiously that nobody likes you anyway, even if you're right. And so Florio, I think, does a really great job as not just a hustler, but an information man who's willing to also call out other information people.

Is that Affliction airborne?

It's not contagious, although you seem to have gotten some of it. You seem to have gotten some of it in this studio. Oh, no, it's getting on me. We do have some people around here. I've been right about the heat for four years. No, I haven't. I was right about the Panthers.

All they had to do was put us in the CFP, and I was right.

Roy, you're not the person here who is afflicted with this. You seem to be immune to this particular contagion. Yeah, because I keep it quiet. Yes.

Okay, Nikola, quiz Frage.

Homeoffice Barstader oder Fahrtkosten. Was bringt uns mehr? Moment. Ich check das kurz. Oha, Homeoffice gewinnt. Bringt uns 150 € mehr im Jahr. Ja, richtig. Aber wieso weißt du so was? Weil, wieso Steuer die Erstattung live anzeigt? Dass es einfach. Don Leverthard.

Quiet, man. Yes. I'm a married man. I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line back in my day.

That you wrote Stugatz.

I wish you were here, my wife. I really miss her. No, I don't. That's the thing about being married. You're not allowed to say, I don't miss my wife. I've been gone two days. I haven't been gone long enough to miss my wife. I'm sorry. I call her. I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds. What am I? Hello. All right. All right. We'll see you. All right. And then I'm going to see her in two days. I was jumping Charlie. Good.

This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugats.

The thing that I wanted to get to with you guys is there was a guy at the draft, last name Tate, who ran a 40 time that Schefter immediately came out and said, Well, that 40 time wasn't right. He's faster than that. And he's a Drew Rosenhaus client. And Florio immediately came out and called out Schefter on it saying, You're just doing an agent's work for him there. You're not passing information. When are these times wrong? They're at the scouting combine. They're doing precision timing. You're taking the word of Drew Rosenhaus, but not saying that it's coming from Drew Rosenhaus. You're reporting his fact that that guy might be faster than we think he is. What did you take or what do you make of the fact that the information, and we've known this about Schefter for a while, right? He had that giant controversy where he was sending a Washington Commander's executive, basically something he'd written to get it edited by that Washington Commander's GM. What do you make of this, Zez?

Well, you're also leaving out the part where then Florio posted screen grabs of text messages from other people who were at the combine, and they were timing the players, and they all had the time or extremely close to the time that Florio was saying, and he posted them all there. It feels like it's what you said, that the agent, in this case, Drew Rosenhouse.

Well, I love that Florio does this, that he's willing to do it. Not many people are, but I wonder how the audience at large. Schefter's a giant. Schefter in this business is the person. And he's pretty untouchable. The sausage is made, though, in a way that's dirty. That transaction, to me, is not journalism. It's not merely a conflict of interest. It's wrong.

But what's the repercussions?

There don't seem to be any, but it's at least in part because nobody cares. It's not because it's not wrong. It's because nobody cares about the wrong. They want their information from the information guy, and they don't care how the information guy gets the information. While I'm wagging a finger at it and scolding and being right in the wrong tone so everyone gets mad at me for talking about it, it makes me no less right to say, That ain't right.

Maybe this doesn't sound right, but shouldn't you understand that that's part of the deal? That's how Adam Schefter becomes the gold standard in NFL reporting?

When did it become part of the deal?

I'm not supposed to do interpretations on the truth when it's journalists giving it to me. They're supposed to be giving me objective fact I mean, there are journalism aspects to what it is that he does, but I think he's a personality, first and foremost. Oh, but I don't think that that's how... I mean, he came up in newspaper writing, Look, this is the golden age of ESPN. Is trafficking in the credibility of newspapers to make themselves. I've talked about all of this before, but the short part of the story is ESPN had no moral obligation to become a journalism company. They decided to do so because they thought it would be good for business to get into the journalism business. They've since largely gotten out of it, even though they just hired a bunch of Washington Post reporters because journalists are now more available because the media is either collapsing or collapsed. Well, you know who else came up in newspapers?

Stephen A. Smith. Exactly.

Yeah, but Stephen A. Smith is now widely viewed as an entertainer who he himself considers himself a journalist. But I think people do understand that what he's doing on first take, that's not journalism, no matter how much he tries to apply some journalism standards to it. First word in ESPN is always entertainment. There's no J in there.

I get you, but I think even this little gambit is still subjective. He could be faster. He could be.

Yeah, but what's What's happening there, though, is you're taking Drew Rosenhaus's biased information, you're presenting it as your own, and it's not impartial information and also not likely to be accurate. Not likely to be accurate.

Carnal tape does seem faster to me. I was surprised. I've watched him plenty. You know what? I'm confirming Adam Schefter's report. Tate is faster.

You happen to know?

That's not a happen to know. See, he doesn't play with the happen to know because he's playing the line between journalist and entertainer. When he does happen to know- You know when I'm a J. Yes, you do. Journalism. So what's the game? Big signing or not a big signing?

I think it's actually big move or not a big move.

Because there are trades, you got to be able to hedge your bets for that.

Okay, so do you want to throw some his way? Do you guys have... I don't know. So the biggest move so far, we were talking about Malik Willis here locally, and you mentioned Kenneth Walker to the Chiefs. I think Mike Evans is not a low-key sign signing. I think if you can get Mike Evans, as San Francisco has gotten Mike Evans, that's a big signing. But the biggest one so far is blank before we get to big move or not a big move. The one so far that you guys say is the biggest- Malik That's the biggest? Yeah.

Max Crosby.

That was a trade.

Well, I mean, what are you talking about?

It's a move.

You said it's a move. You said it's a move.

Like I said, that counts because this is big move or not a big move. Excellent job, Mike.

They corrected Zaz, and he walked back his position. What the Rams are doing is also interesting with McDuffy and their biggest weakness the second half of the season. They were a play away was their defensive backplay. But what do you have for us, Tony, that you're going to throw Zaz his way?

Former Miami Dolph and Jalen Phillips moving from Philadelphia to the Carolina Panthers signing a four-year, $120 million deal, $80 of it guaranteed Keed. That's big.

That's big move. That's a big move. That's a big move. Carolina, I think, I think, Bryce Young is on the ascension. I like what I saw from him last year. Can't always be a star in your first year. Carolina made the playoffs last year. Go and get a really good player. He's got to stay healthy. Of course, we can say that about anyone. I got a big move.

Good for Jalen Phillips, incidentally, because that's a guy you root for.

Yeah, it's a guy that almost medically retired in college. Yeah.

That guy's body has been through it. For him to get a big contract to be traded to Philadelphia to be successful in Philadelphia, and to be someone who's a successful edge rusher, even though in Miami that last year, he was the king of almost. He had so many plays- That's larger's game. Where he almost made the play.

The new Wiffer. Who'd your dad call the Wiffer? Stanton.

Well, to give people the entire context of the conversation, because it's a good one. My father, on television for several years, would simply refer to Jean Carlos Stanton as the Whiffer. Then at an apartment in Miami Beach, an apartment complex, we get on to an elevator with Jean Carlos Stanton and Ricky Nalasco, a giant John Carlos Stanton. I'm like, Dad, don't. And my father's like, What? He's a Wiffer. Just says it right in front of him in a really confined space.

What does Stanton do?

He just stared at us as I was mortified. Big guy, huh? Yeah, but what's he going to My father's a 75-year-old man. He's going to bury him in the elevator. But he actually smiled. Actually, Jean Carlos, he knows he's a wiffer.

Yeah, he knows he struck out 200 times.

Zaz, second biggest contract doled out over the weekend. Alex pierce, staying with the Colts, four years, $114 million. Big move, not a big move.

I'm going not a big move because essentially this move cost them Michael Pitman, right? I don't know. I think I'd rather keep Michael Pitman at the number that he was making as opposed to Alex pierce and sign him to that. I don't know. Does Alex pierce scream to you like big-time number one wide receiver?

Greg Cody, last week, this was shocking to me, had never heard of him somehow.

He also called him Alex.

Yeah, it was weird.

I've never heard of Alex pierce.

Is that the fewest catches ever to get to a thousand yards?

I also have to tell people, my apologies, not telling you earlier than this, Greg Cody is on a vacation somewhere. So He was scheduled to be with us today, but I got in here today, and he was not here, and his son's not here. And again, the longtime NFL writer for the Miami Héral did not know who Alec pierce was last time he was in here.

It was part of my low-key signings, too.

Did you see he posted a video out on a beach yesterday? Yes. Live reaction.

It was really important for him to inform everybody from that beach how right he was about both things. He predicted they'd get rid of Tua, and he predicted they'd get Malik Willis.

Fuentes, can you do me the favor of getting that video so we have the spirit and the feel of Greg Cody here on a Greg Cody Tuesday?

Rare statistical tie in the NFL. Alex pierce tied to Sean Jackson for fewest catches to get to a thousand years.

Did Greg give you that virus that we were talking about before, Dan?

No, people love Greg Cody. Greg Cody is not afflicted with his message getting contaminated by how obnoxious he is.

He's just rarely right. True.

Zaz, New York Giants, wide receiver, Wanda Robinson, now the number one target for Kam Ward over in Tennessee. Wanda Robinson, 4 for 70. Big move, not a big move.

I'm going big move. If you draft Kam Ward, number one overall, you got to give him a little bit of help, even if it means you overpay. Free agency, you inherently overpay every time. But I like that. It's been move.

Travis Etienne goes from Jacksonville to New Orleans. Does that spell a problem for Alvin Kamara? Etienne, four years, 52 million.

Yeah, I like it. I think Etienne is a really good player. I think it's a good move. I think it's a big move for New Orleans.

I like K Walker, three. Super Bowl MVP, low-key, a lot we're saying. Now the Chiefs get their number one guy. How do you feel about that?

Yeah, I'm going big move there. Running backs, really good history with Andy Reid in Kansas City. I especially like it because there was thought that maybe Kansas City would wind up trying to acquire in the draft, Jeremiah Love. But I would rather have Kenneth Walker in draft another player.

You think the Super Bowl MVP to the team of a Generation is a big move, do you?

Hey, I only have two choices. It wasn't like, Hey, Zazlo, tell us what you think is the biggest You like that move? And then I said, Kenneth Walker. I was asked, Is Kenneth Walker a big move or is it not a big move? And obviously the answer is big move.

Yeah, you like that move?

So I don't know what you're talking about or trying to accomplish you, Mike.

I just asked you seconds ago before we started playing big move or not a big move, what was the biggest move? And you said Malik Willis, which is Asana.

Well, I got confused for a second. What's a move and what's a signing?

Another guy on the move from Jacksonville heading over to Carolina, Devon Lloyd, three New Year's 45 Millie.

I'm going not a big move, mainly because I don't know that fool.

But that disqualifies you. I appreciate the honesty. You know what? I don't, actually. Wow. I don't think- That Lloyd's great. I don't appreciate the ignorance in the honesty.

Did you not watch that Monday Night Football game against the Chiefs?

He was all over the field. I'm doing Afternoon Drive on I can't tell you, by the way.

You're going to know all about him by that.

Is it with Harry Douglas? To Freddie. Oh, it's Freddie Coleman. All right. Yeah, let's go. Do you have anything else here, Tony?

One big move that happened, two. You don't get to decide whether it's a big move or not. I'm telling you it's a big move.

You don't get to decide that.

He's deciding that.

From New England- He's deciding it.

Joining to a Tunga-Viloa in Atlanta. The one and only, one year, 3. 25 millimeter Austin Hooper moves over to Atlanta to be their number two tight end. Big move, not a big move.

Not a big move.

What do you know?

No, nothing. Kyle Pitz is the guy there. Who cares about number two tight-end?

Have you heard a blocking tight-end?

Full circle moment for Austin Hooper, who is somehow, I think, only 31 years old.

You've been talking about Austin Hooper for a while. The Patriots offense was largely Hunter Henry, giant runs, and occasional passes to Stefan Diggs. Were any of you surprised that Stefan Diggs was let go after just one year with the England? Not at all.

Not at No, you get one good year and it's like, All right, it's a powder keg. Let's call it a day.

Let's get to that video, please, of Greg Cody on vacation, being right and feeling the need from a beach somewhere to give you his Dolphins' opinions from, I'm going to guess, the Caribbean somewhere. I'm not totally sure. Where did you see this, Aslo? I think it was posted online. Okay. It felt to you the same? It felt like he was just going to be right? Oh, He wanted to make sure that everyone knew that he was right.

Yeah, he's got to let you know that if Greg Cody is going to be right, see, he's on vacation. He's got a few drinks in him. He's not just going to say, Hey, let me do work. All right? That's not his strong suit. But if he finds out that he was right about things, Hey, Christopher, fire up the iPhone here. I got something to say.

That's what it's about. Wait a minute. You don't think he's not filming himself in the video that we are attempting to locate now? No, there's a cameraman. There's a cameraman, and you're assuming that Chris is on vacation with him. The Coties tend to take cruises together.

I am confirming reports, but it sounds like he's reporting from the Virgin Islands, or at least they were virgin before he got there.

So not a house of dick.

No, but they're in two separate vacations, Dan. So Chris was somewhere else, Greg, somewhere else. Oh, they're not together? No, two different Caribbean vacations.

But the Dolphins got a quarterback, and that's a bad time for the legendary Miami Harold columnist to not have a microphone, to not have an ability to get to people he believes that everyone wants to hear his informed opinion.

I think vacation the first day of NFL free agency, that's bad timing.

To be fair, nobody had any idea that NFL free agency was March ninth. We had no clue.

It is strange that Greg would decide to go on a quick vacation the day that NFL free agency starts at noon when the dolphins are in almost total upheaval and changing the entirety of their friend.

When's his next scheduled vacation? Nfl draft?

Probably.

The Super Bowl? You think he'll just take off on the Super Bowl?

Stop throwing stones, Devon Lloyd. All right. He's a pro-bowler. You should know better.

The Coateies love a Cruise. They are trashy. And let's see if you can tell from his hair here whether Greg Coate is trashy.

Okay. So as I'm recording this on a beach in Tortola, the dolphins have cut to a tongue of aloe as expected and signed Malik Willis, which I predicted they would and advocated that they do. Congratulations, Dolphins, for following my advice. But here I am, not doing my job. Basically, just drinking a rum drink on a beach in Tortola, which, by the way, Tortola to me always sounded like a pasta, a type of pasta or the actor, the famous American actor, John Tortola. But instead, it turns out it's the biggest island in the British Virgin Islands. We're here on the first stop of our crew. Had a great time so far. A lot of drinking, a lot of partying. Went some money in the casino, which is always a bonus. Did well in the slots, did well at roulette. Loved the big wheel, the big clicking wheel. And took a master class in how to make a tenderloin. Had a bourbon tasting. It's been fantastic. And we'll come to you again soon. See you later. The C, right in my background. See you later.

Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right?

Don't place parlays on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is one when it hasn't hit triple zero.

Always drink your Jägermeister ice cold.

That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion.

Everything else?

Everything else.

Wearing clean underwear every day?

Well, that's just a personal decision.

Brushing your teeth?

Obviously smart, but not a rule.

Never PP on an electric fence.

Okay, maybe there are two rules, but the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Jägermeister must be drink ice cold. Or don't drink it at all. Damn, that's cold.

Exactly. You're finally starting to get it.

Drink responsibly. Jägermeister L'Core, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mass Jägermeister US, White Plains, New New York.