Transcript of Hour 2: The Edgar Allan Poesers

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Football season is here, and there's absolutely nothing better than game day, but it can be a little bit stressful. You're placing bets, you're setting fantasy lineups, you're figuring out the most comfortable position to sit on your couch for the next 12 hours. No one has time to think about this part. Cooking. Well, thanks to DoorDash, you don't have to I'll tell you about that. Doordash is the best place to order all your game day favorites. Chicken wings, nachos, burgers, dogs, maybe even chips and guac, something like that, get a little salsa in there. It can all be delivered with DoorDash. So this football season, don't stress about the cooking. Kick back and enjoy game day, thanks to DoorDash. Doordash, your door to more. Download the DoorDash app now to order your game day favorites.

This is the Dan Levatore show with the Stugats podcast.

Start of the day, start of the day. It is the start of the day. Start of the day, start of the day.

It is the start of the day. Start of the day, Start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, it is the start of the day.

Today's Stat of the Day is brought to you by Venmo.

I thought you guys would give me some buy-in when I said that Kirk Cousins in his last game threw for more yards than the Patriots had thrown for in their first four games. You guys yawned in my face on that stat.

No one is surprised by how bad the Patriots are, though.

We're all usually yawning while we Let's watch the Patriots play, so that's probably what.

But 509 yards in one game, and the Patriots have four games and come in at like 4:44. Okay, I'm not going to convince you of it. It's October. Yeah, it is October. Jeremy, what do you have for us on the stat of the day front?

I have three different baseball stats of the day. A couple of them come from the Philly's Mets game because that game was out of control. It was three nothing Mets. Then, to reference back to the earlier parts of the show, all hell I did break loose in this game because Bryce Harper started the scoring with his two-run home run for the Philly's. Bryce Harper teams in the postseason have now won 12 straight games in which he has homered. That's stat number one, 12 straight games in which Bryce Harper is homered in which his team is one in the playoff.

David Samson has been very hard to impress today conversationally with anything we're talking about. The king of pooh-pooh. You guys have broken a show a record for shaking your head at things that are being said by a single person. Why did you so, so with your hand that as if it's not an impressive stat that every time Bryce Harper homers through the last few postseasons, and incidentally, he's one of the best postseason players ever empirically and statistically. Why are you saying, That's just an okay stat?

Because the stat is that when you homer, when you homer or out homer your opponent, you're going to win the game.

Of course, but it's the longest streak in baseball history of a single player. It's pretty good. He extended his own. All right, fine. He maybe didn't have the best day of everybody on the Philly's. Nick Castaianos himself had a crazy day because he was being booed by the fans. You could see him on TV basically telling the fans to F off. Home fans. Then he hit a game-tying homer and ultimately walked it off. But I would argue that the best day of anyone on the Philly's was Bryson Stott. He's the first player with a go-ahead hit in the thinning or later of a postseason game on his birthday. How about that one? That's good. What a birthday.

That's amazing. That's the universe of how many people are in that category.

Could cut that laugh up. I can't imagine there were so many guys to play, but that's a pretty special stat. That's a pretty special birthday.

Happy birthday to him. I don't care.

And finally, today's stat of the day.

Jeremy, respect all of it. Step it all over. Jeremy, respect the bleep and happy.

It doesn't matter without the good luck, Jeremy.

Come on.

Jeremy. Stop talking. Honestly, you're so eager to talk all the time, Jeremy, that you disrespect.

Happy birthday to him. I don't care.

So can I go- Good luck.

Come on, Ben.

Get out, Jeremy. Get out. Get out, Jeremy. I don't even want your third stat of the day.

It was our only hope, though.

I don't want it.

You needed the third to make Venmo happy.

I don't want it. Oh, they're happy. Make sure that he pays his $5 that he owes. Via Venmo. I'm so tired of people around here getting out of all of their fines because they say, I'll get you later. Yeah, I'm on it. Make sure that somebody gets his $5.

I have it. I already did it. I got the tenor for you. Where is the fine bucket? The tenor? Nobody's ever said that word in their life until you just now.

A tenor? Put it on the poll, please, Juju, at Levitard Show. Have you ever referred to a $10 bill as a tener.

A ten-ski. You could say a five-ski.

What's the 10 then? A ten-ski? Yes.

I don't know why we're making it Polish. I don't know why we're making a Polish currency of some sort. Jessica, we haven't talked enough college football today, although we did talk a lot of University of Miami. Give me something college football-related, anything at all. You can choose from anything on the wheel of college football issues that you wish to talk about.

Okay, I want to talk about the Texas A&M, Missouri game. So something very strange happened before this game. Missouri's one of the wide receivers went to the hotel room at College Station where they were staying and had a package in his room that had a blanket that said, warm welcome to College Station. And it was a Texas A&M blanket, and it was supposedly from a Texas A&M DB named Mike the Blanket Lee. So he walked out onto the field wearing the blanket, and It was supposed to be like, I'm going to blanket you during the game. You're not going to get any receptions. I don't know why. Felt like I had to explain that part, but it felt like it was necessary. So the wide receiver is like, I got this weird blanket. He wore it out onto the field before the game. And then he proceeded to have a terrible first half. Missouri got blown out. They kicked the saddest field goal. I think I've seen in, honestly, probably a few years. They were down, I think, 41 to seven when they kicked a field goal in the fourth quarter. It was not very becoming of a top 10 team.

So anyways, after the game, Mike Elko, the head coach at Texas A&M, was asked about this blanket thing, and they were like, Did you do this? Why did you put a blanket in his room? And he was like, No, you should ask them about that. They did the blanket gimmick to themselves, and we had nothing to do with this. So I'm still investigating the situation to find out who put the blanket in the hotel room. But either way, if Missouri's head coach did the blanket thing to his own player, and then they lost by 31 points, He tried to do fake bulletin board material.

You don't have enough here, so I'm just going to make up a controversy.

The idea that an opposing player would send a gift to somebody as trash talk. First of all, I think it's next level. But then the coach... I'm sorry. But somebody doing it as a fake, I think that is nonsense.

I don't like gimmicks like this. Gimmicks like this only work if you win. Gimmicks like this when you kick the saddest field goal that I've seen in 10 years are... That is tough look. Not to mention, I mean, Missouri got totally blown out of this game. Texas A&M had a outstanding game offensively. Connor Wigman was back. He finished in, I want to say, 90 percentile plus in EPA per play and every other offensive metric in that game. And then the defense had five sacks and eight tackles for loss. So Texas A&M, they completely kicked their ass. And this blanket gimmick, it just makes me feel awkward. I'm cringing a little bit at this.

The Texas A&M defensive line is supposed to have a couple of guys, maybe three guys, who are top 100 picks. But speaking of gimmicks here and things that blow up in your face, I want to show the people. I don't know if people saw yesterday that Odell Beckham made his return for the Dolphins and was wearing a truly wonderful and outlandish flamboyant hat made of an assortment of furs and feathers. And if you're going to come in with that hat upon your triumphant return, you have to do slightly better than zero catches for zero yards.

I thought it was John 3:16. Was that not what he was going for?

You think that John 3:16, that that's a biblical fur and feather hat? You believe that the feather and fur hat is John 3:16? I don't know what it is that you're doing with that hat. That doesn't look like a biblical times hat.

I don't know- You're going to have to explain this one to me, David. There was a guy who would go to football games in a wig, and he would hold up a sign, John 3:16.

Oh, you're talking about, yes, many years ago, Monday Night Football, there was a famous fan who would just wear a crazy wig. You thought that was a wig, that that's not a stylish hat that Odell Beckham is wearing.

This was Odel Beckham paying homage to this person that only you remember. I promise you I'm not the only one who knows.

He would wear a wig and hold up a biblical sign because he was getting... He was Marlin's Man before Marlin's Man. You old.

I thought you were saying that he was paying The homage to the Bible verse, John 3:16, For God so loved the world, he gave the world his only begotten son. Two targets.

That's John 3:16. He wore a wig that was multi-colored. Make fun of me all you want because you've been doing it all show.

He is currently serving three life sentences in prison.

It's not ideal. John 3:16 is?

John 3:16 is. He was arrested in 1992 after a standoff at a Los Angeles hotel. I'll find more details and get back to you. But pretty amazing that we'd reference that guy, and he's now in jail for the rest of his life.

Three life sentences. You want to give us your third stat of the day? You redeemed yourself with that fact, or would you want to give us your third stat of the day?

Today's pitcher for My Detroit Tiger is Tarek Scouble. His opponent OPS over the last two years is 5:53. The only American League pitcher with a better run over two years in the last 50 is Pedro Martínez.

He's really good.

That's a good stat. That's a great stat.

Hey, folks, it's Mike. From defending your favorite team after a bad loss to obsessively checking your fantasy lineups, football fandom is bigger than just Sundays. Miller light knows the passion that comes with rooting for your team. Like the debate that sparked in 1975, Great taste versus less filling. So what is the best thing about the original light beer? Let it be both. Yeah, let it be both. The fact that it has great taste and is also less filling. You don't have to pick your favorite because Miller light keeps it simple. Undebatable quality, great taste at only 96 calories. It's a beer that strips away everything that you don't need and holds on to what matters most, the original light beer since 1975. Make your game time taste like Miller time. It tastes great and it's less filling. Let it be both. To get Miller Life delivered right to your door, visit millerlife. Com/dan, where you can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories per 12 ounces. Fewer cows and carbs in premium regular beer.

Football season is here, and there is absolutely nothing better than game day, but it can be a little bit stressful. You're placing bets, you're setting fantasy lineups, you're figuring out the most comfortable position to sit on your couch for the next 12 hours, No one has time to think about this part. Cooking. Well, thanks to DoorDash, you don't have to worry about that. Doordash is the best place to order all your game day favorites. Chicken wings, nachos, burgers, dogs, maybe even chips and guac, something like that. Get a little salsa in there. It can all be delivered with DoorDash. So this football season, don't stress about the cooking. Kick back and enjoy game day, thanks to DoorDash. Doordash, your door to more. Download the DoorDash app now to order your game day favorites.

Don Levatard. While I was gone, a third zagaki was born, and I think I heard, correct me if I'm wrong here, Jeremy trying to partake in a fourth zagaki, and I am here for a future where I am surrounded by a chorus of clucking zagakis. Stugatz.

You know what it means when you have four zagakis, Dan? You don't have one. This is the Don Levatard show with the Stugatz.

Jay, I need your help. Unfortunately, I'm a A lot of people leaving the help. I need you to tell me why the Steeler's offense is what it is, even after hiring a new offensive coordinator and getting Justin Fields. Started out 3-0, had a good game against the Colts, and now what happened on Sunday night football?

Here's the thing with the Steelers. Steelers, every game, like Steelers football, every game is going to be close. They want to run the ball. They want to run with defense. They're hoping the quarterback doesn't screw up, hoping the quarterback makes just enough plays. That is my team football. That's what it is. And when they brought Justin Fields as And Russell Wilson, they told both of them, This is how it's going to be. It's not going to be a high-flying offense. We're not going to be out there trying to throw for 450 yards. This is what it's going to be. But also, Justin Fields, he's a reclamation project for them. So it's not everybody wants him. The first couple of weeks, he was doing great, but he's got a little bit of ways to go.

I know. I mean, Mike D. Football is great, and the defense, up until the end, they played great.

But- You love them when you win 16:50.

It's hard to watch week in and week out. And now I'm wondering what's going on with George Pickens? I'm seeing that he didn't play very many snaps on Sunday night football. Do you have any idea what's going on there?

No, I didn't. I haven't talked to them from last night to this morning there. But no, Pickens is still... He's their guy. He's the number one guy on that team. They weren't trying to... I will tell you this, when they were in the Brandon Auk trades and the 49ers were looking for another receiver, and they brought up George Pickens, still was like, No shot. Absolutely not. No, we're not even going there. George Pickens He's very talented, but he's like a lot of receivers. You got to make sure that you handle in the right way.

Shana Hans' 49ers had been 38 and 0 when leading by 10 points in the fourth quarter and below yesterday's to the Cardinals, giving up 11 in the fourth. I want to know the sneaky impact here. Jake Moody makes a tackle in the second quarter, ends up out for the rest of the game, impacts the 49ers' ability to go for any field goals in the long run. They end up blowing this game. How much is Jake Moody attempting a tackle going to influence the NFC playoff picture down the road? Because I believe this tackle ultimately changes everything as the Cardinals get to two and three, and the San Francisco 49ers dropped to two and three.

You got to stop drug testing over there at the Loan Tart show.

I wish I could get him to talk slightly less, slightly more efficiently when he talks. I have not been able to achieve that quite yet. Do you have an answer to what it is that he is saying there, though, about the 49ers looking less good than any of us thought that they would look?

Last night, I was just texting John Lynch about it, and he was just... It's like, they're off filter right now, but 49ers are always that type of team also that as the year gets on, later on, they're the team that you just don't want to face later on. I have zero questions about whether the Niners be a team you want to face down to playoff time, down in crunch time there. But I think that they've had a lot of things that have thrown off their rhythm. One, look, the preseason 2 with Trent Williams, Iuk. I think they got thrown off by there. Iuk really waiting until week five to get on his track. All the injuries, the Christian McCafre injury, obviously, a little Frenchman's going back there. The Kittle, Warner, they've had so many different injuries there also. But when it comes time to it, man, a Kyle Shana team is going to be a dangerous team later on.

But without Christian McCafre, and you've got people suggesting that maybe it might be a very serious injury long term, might even be the same player.

The problem is with that injury is this inflammation. You don't really decide when it's there and when it goes. And also it can come back fully. He could be great, and all of a sudden, it could just grab again. It's a weird injury.

What do you make of Devante Adams putting up Edgar Allan Poe on his social media?

What do you put up? I try not follow social media anymore, man. That's what my wife is for. She She looks at all that crap.

What do you mean? People assume that it's because, quote The Raven evermore, that it's the poem, What are you making faces? He's not going to go to the Raven. No, not going to go to the Raven.

That's what we're saying. But here's the thing. Devante, last Sunday, is that what you put up? Last Sunday, they think he's in that. It's hilarious.

It's hysterical.

It is. You can't help but love it. How am I trying to talk over this shit?

I don't know how to do it.

It is funny. I hardly get speechless, as you know.

It's funny. Where is he going to end up? And what- This guy on my screen.

And then I wanted to say something snarky there, where I'm like, That's why I'm not on social media. Hey, what is social media going to say? If I say something bad about Edgar Allan Poe, I'm not going to get that rap. You don't want the Poe zealets to come out after you.

They're like the worst in the Swifties. Everybody knows that.

We don't want the posers attacking me.

They be alone. So you're on for Sunday, and last Sunday, everything's fine. Before the game, during the game, after the break. He comes in Monday morning, he calls up, he text Antonio pierce like, Hey, I need to meet with you. And AP thought it was about the hamstering. And all of a sudden, he's like, Hey, I'm out. You got to get me out. I don't want my career. I don't like I've got them out. Instead of saying, Well, we'll see, we'll decide, they just granted it and let teams know it's a two plus if you want it. But I'll say this, there are people in the organization. There are teams that called about Devante. The Jets did, the Niners did, all these teams in the preseason. Tom Fileska, their general manager, said, I got to give Antonio time with him. We got If I were to give AP a chance. But there were other people in the organization said, Man, we should trade him because we don't have that quarterback in the future, and he's going to get frustrated. And eventually, this is going to lead to this anyway. So let's do it. However, with that said, look, the Jets are in, the Saints, they're in.

The Steelers play them next week, so maybe they'll look at it also. The Ravens, though, the Ravens love their team chemistry. I don't see the Ravens making this move. And it's also So there's not a lot of teams who have the cap space to just bring them in as it is. If the Saints want to do it, they're going to have to redo his deal or have the Raiders take on some of the money, which they don't want to do. So they'd have to redo them to an extension where a team like the Jets don't have to do it. So there's a lot of factors involved there.

This episode of the Dan Leventard Show with Stugatz is presented by Smirnoff. We do game days. Please drink responsibly. The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York.

I should have told- You know who drank a lot of Smirnoff?

Is that Edgar Allan Poe.

Everyone knows that about all the posers, a toast from the posers to Edgar Allan Poe.

That's just me trying to get back on their good side.

Yes, I appreciate that. Aaron Rodgers, his performance on Sunday and in general, what are you making of what's happening there?

Some of it is like, man, it's not Aaron Rodgers-ish, right? But I think we're almost taking away the fact that, man, the guy had missed a whole year. He just missed a whole year, right? Missed the entire year, didn't do any preseason with these guys. The timing is just not what you want it to be. But I'm a little surprised that running games not going better. Defensively, that unit still is… Personnel-wise, they've got a fantastic team over there. Personnel-wise, they're fantastic. So yeah, a lot of it falls on Aaron, and they put so much on Aaron to be the savior over there.

Tell me, Jay, what happened with that cat? I want more information on that. No, it's a dog.

Not only is it a dog, it's… Come here, where's Luffy? Not only is it a dog, it's a little handicapped Frenchie that we rescued from a kill shelter. These people were like, Yeah, see, now I'm going to make you feel bad. But these people brought him in to a kill shelter because his legs don't work anymore. The kill shelter is like, Well, there's non-kill shelters here. Whoever brought him in is like, No, it's okay. His legs don't work anymore. So we rescued him. And my wife, Rosie, there did massage and laser. And here, baby.

He's got speed. He's scamping.

She got him walking and running. Here, come here. He made a little. Here he is. Yes. Hey. Hey, star. By the way, Lucky, huge Edgar Allan Pope fan.

Yes, as we all are, what are make of what happened with Josh Allen, the bills, and specifically the time management at the end of that game, Jay?

Yeah, that didn't make a lot of sense right there, that time management. I think the bills, though, it's pretty interesting. I don't know if it's getting rid of one guy, but they do seem like more of a team. I don't look at it and go, game by game, I don't judge them. I judge them more by what I think is the whole product. I think the whole product as a team, they do look better. They do look like they're more on the same page. When you don't have to force the ball on one guy and you don't have that drama anymore, I do think they're a better team. I think the clock management was a head scratcher, yes. The coach got to get out of the way there, yes.

Let's put up on the screen here? Stefan Diggs giving Josh Allen the side eye at the end of this game here between- But didn't they love each other up or no?

Do they?

Well, we prefer to accent the negative and the side eye from Stéphane Diggs. There may be great context here, and they said all the right things.

He could even look at somebody over there. I don't know.

It could be. You're right.

Very telling, I think.

It's like those lip readers who come on. I'm like, You're so full of shit. You don't know what these people say, or the body language experts.

Agreed. Totally unfair, but funny nonetheless. It was a weird game, though, for Josh Allen. He played very poorly. Also, Jay, the science of he seemed pretty clearly concussed. He needed to be out of that game, did he not? The science on how they put people in and out of the game seems fairly arbitrary still.

But it is hard to do that because sometimes if you're dinged, man, I'm usually the worst guy to talk about head injuries with, guys, because my other job was to remove you from your consciousness. So I'm usually a bad guy to talk about this stuff. We used to spar in practice, and you get knocked out, they pull you aside, they give you smelling salt, and you come back later that day or the next day. So there's this A lot of different levels. So I'm always like, Oh, man, I'm the worst guy to talk about these things.

Jay, when Joe Burrow says his team is not a Championship caliber team after scoring 38 against the Ravens in overtime, is he just calling out his defense right there?

No, I think they're looking at... Look, first of all, they have been decimated. That defense, like Lou Anerama, that defense coordinator, that side of the ball, they are phenomenal. And they have been decimated by injuries starting all the way back in camp. It's like the ramps. There's only so many injuries you can go through. There's so many teams that are dealing with that right now. There's only so much you could overcome. I think he's frustrated because they're not playing at the level that they're normally used to playing at. And also like, hey, if you're on an NFL roster, you're expecting a guy to, hey, next man up. But that's like, cliché. It's not the truth. It's like you can't have next man up. If If Pukha and Cooper go down for the Rams, you can't just assume, Why the next two guys are going to be on their level? It's the same thing with guys over there in Cincinnati, and they've had a lot of drama with Chase going over there, and Tee Higgins was legitimately banged up. And I just think that they've been so banged up. They are a... Look, Zack Teller. People always talk about the Sean McVeigh coaching tree with Lafleur and Kevin O'Neill.

And you forget Zack Teller for some reason. He is a Again, that's one of the best coaching staffs in the NFL over there. And I just think that they've just been behind the eight ball with so many injuries.

With all those injuries and some of the other team struggles, Jay, how bad is the AFC? I feel like this is the worst conference I can remember in years all the way down. There are so many weaknesses. After the Chiefs who are undefeated, I mean, every single team has weaknesses. Even the Ravens gave up 38 points in their win. There have been these teams- They gave them 38 in They're in the what? I know they won. The point being is that I feel like, and maybe I'm wrong, the depth within this conference, there is just a giant drop off of talent after those first handful of teams. And even those handful of teams seem to have some major weaknesses, no?

I think every team in the league has pretty much weaknesses. But even the Chiefs, they got weaknesses at receiver. They got weaknesses at tackle. That's how this league is. But no, I think the Chiefs, as they get healthier, too, their receiver position, they'll get better. If they get more depth over there, they figure out their tackle situation more. But the Ravens, man, no, that place is a culture of violence. They are. And plus, too, They got like, Pick your poison. Now that they got Derrick Henry rolling like that, who are you going to focus on? You're going to focus on Derrick, you're going to focus on Lamar, but you're expecting everybody else to play like, Man, they're the 72 Dolphins every single game. That's not how this league is. But I think the Bills do. I think the Bills are, besides the brain fart net that you have some time management over there, I think the Bills are a team who are up here when it comes to ranking the teams in the NFL.

Jay, good I'm talking to you. As always, I don't think that the Ravens can have a culture of violence if the stealers have the culture of violence. You said last week that they can't both have the culture of violence. One of them needs to have the culture of violence. It's not exclusive. It is exclusive. Jay, it's not copyright Copyright. Good talking to you.

I should copyright it.

See you later. Good talking to you. Enjoy talking Edgar Allan Poe with you. Good seeing you, David.

Keep non-drug testing over there.

Hey, folks, it's Mike. From defending your favorite team after a bad loss to obsessively checking your fantasy lineups, football fandom is bigger than just Sundays. Miller Light knows the passion that comes with rooting for your team, like the debate that sparked in 1975, great taste versus less filling. So what is the best thing about the original light beer? Let it be both. Yeah, let it be both. The fact that it has great taste and is also less filling. You don't have to pick your favorite because Miller Light keeps it simple. Undebatable quality, great taste at only 96 calories. It's a beer that strips away everything that you don't need and holds on to what matters most, the original light beer since 1975. Make your game time taste like Miller time. Tastes great and it's less filling. Let it be both. To get Miller Light delivered right to your door, visit millerlife. Com/dan, where you can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories per 12 ounces. Fewer cows and carbs in premium regular beer.

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