Transcript of How a Homeless Dropout Built 8-Figures Without Burning Out

Pretty much everything. This guy's had multiple exits, big-time entrepreneur, and somebody who is here to inspire the world. Please welcome Stephen Scoggins. Thanks, Stephen. Dude, are you kidding?

Clying down here. Bro, of course I would, man. We had that awesome vibe with you on my show, man. I was like, Dude, I got to get down to Cali.

Welcome to another episode of Coffees. Dude, I'm so stoked that you're here, that you flew in. Steven, you look like a very fit dude. I like to ask everybody the same question. What's your morning routine?

Morning routine is actually fairly boring. Well, actually, it's not for me. So one of the things I discovered while building businesses is when you start as an entrepreneur, one of the things you do is you wake up with anxious energy. You feel like if you're not ticking, you just stumble everywhere. And what I realized is how I started my day was how I did my day and finished my day. If I started off with a bunch of anxious energy and all kinds of stuff, and I would go, That would be the day. The day would be gone. I'm like, What the hell just happened in my day? I actually start off with what I refer to as a presence practice. I wake up 5: 30, 6: 00 in the morning, most mornings. Before I even get out of bed, I say a mantra to myself four times. I'm healthy, I am wealthy, I am wise, I'm a steward of the most high. Probably the most important one was the most difficult one for me to say for as long as I did was, I love you, Steven. One of the things that came out of that is I realized that even when I was building businesses, I was actually chasing worth and not necessarily trying to build legacy.

It was a big shift there. From there, I go out the Lake because my house is on the Lake, Lake Norman, and I'll walk the grass for a half hour. Out there, I'm just slowing things down because what I've discovered is after the exit, I wish I'd known this decade earlier, If I could slow things down in my morning, I could actually accelerate things in my business. That was one of the big takeaways. The presence practice starts there. Occasionally, I did a journaling practice for six months that was really cool. It's called What I Hear You Say Is. I would just go sit down in a quiet and pull a pen out, write that sentence at the top of the thing with a question mark, and I would just sit there and listen. Sometimes it was a minute, sometimes it was 10, sometimes it was 30 seconds. But I would start one word, and the next word would form itself, and before long, I'd have a whole page. And some of the newest ideas, the concepts, we talked a lot about AI and stuff like that when you were on my show. A lot of the really cool things that are starting to take shape now actually came out of those moments.

And what I've discovered is some of the best advice, the best insights, the best steps for your business, the best steps for clarity, and just feeling more aligned. Dude, all of it starts right there. And then I hit the gym. That's my morning routine.

Man, that's pretty robust morning routine. When was your exit from your company?

Late 2023. 2023? Started in 1998 from the trash biles construction site.

We're going to dive into that.

Sleeping in a bar friend's car, and then 25 years later, it was an overnight success.

I love that. Then You got bored.

Yeah, I got bored.

Then you figured out, I'm going to start another company. Yeah.

Almost immediately. It's funny. We were talking off here a little bit about my girlfriend. One of the things she asked me, she says, How did you celebrate? How did you celebrate when you exited your company? I was like, I tried to take three weeks off. When I said, and I used the word tried. But I pretty much started building the next thing almost immediately. That's where she's leaning into it, about more gratitude, just stuff like that.

You It's funny. You could have an exit, but not really exit, which is the position we discussed. You just want to keep building. We're builders.

The crazy part is if you have an exit without what I refer to as a transformational transition strategy. What happens is all the worth, everything you've ever felt about yourself, all of it's tied directly to that business. So you exit, and all of a sudden, you have a bit like an identity crisis. It's like, who am I? Why am I What am I doing? What am I doing about it? Because every day you woke up and you were attacking that thing. Every day. We were talking about having relationships with clients and then trying to feed a family. We both have kids and just trying to I figured that stuff out. It's interesting that... I'll share this with you. One of the things that people don't talk enough about, in my opinion, this is a big one, is what happens when you get the success that you think you always and you realize you're still empty. That's where I was in late 2023. I mean, in early '24. I mean, I was just sitting on top of a mountain in Utah in a beautiful home. It was basically paid for. Could travel, had resource, had time, I wasn't happy.

What do you think was the shift? Was it mental? Was it physical? Was it spiritual for you?

Dude, it was all of it. I'm a person of faith in general. That's My audience knows that. Most people that know me closely know that. I don't flaunt it. I don't put it in people's face and all kinds of stuff. But I had a bit of a spiritual encounter before I started the company. I alluded to the fact about the journal piece, about the way, man, this journal thing is dialed in. This is where I'm getting a lot of this essence. What I've discovered is all of my greatest moments of growth came after my greatest moments of suffering or pain. Ending of a relationship I didn't expect a year or so ago. I thought I was going to get engaged in the whole deal, and it really exploded in my face right after that. I wasn't expecting it. Everything that I had anchored to was uprooted again. But out of that, we start breaking free from things like what I refer to as the self-abandonment cycle or rescuing program. I was very fortunate to my girlfriend now. She's a very successful entrepreneur in her own right, so I know she's in it for me. She's not trying to gain anything or gain the system thing.

As a result, a lot of that becomes spiritual under pressure. What I've tried to do with my life, specifically, is I try to run to my faith at times of crisis rather than let it be the last thing that I show up for. One of the things I'm passionate about, and I tell you what, this came out of that. So, 2017, I did a live event called Transform Your Life in Raleigh area, which is where I'm originally from. I had a modest showing. I had some great thought leaders. Some of them are actually still live in the area, in the California area. Come out, we did an event, some of them were hybrid because it was just right after COVID. I said on stage at the top of my lungs, and this is where you just lose yourself. I know you speak, too. Sometimes you just lose where you're at. Lose your at in a good way. You're in flow. It's like something else is talking through you. I utter these words, If you're going to be successful at life or anything, you have to become one part lion and one part lamb. What's crazy about that is that was the first and last time I said that until about six months ago.

Now that's becoming the entire essence of everything I stand on. How I lead people, how I have relationships, how I build businesses, how I develop myself, how I try to develop my kids, and now believe it or not, grandkids, I'm almost 50, is like, what is the balance? Because if you're building a life or a business and you're all one or the other, then you're out of balance. If you're all lying, you're dominant, you're controlling, you're just the over assertive. You're leading, but you're leading typically from Security or fear. Other side, if you're all a lamb, well, you're a people pleaser. You're getting pushed over. You're getting stepped on. You're not speaking up for yourself. You're self-abandoning. The balance, the paradigm, if you have a giant pendulum, is this concept of being aligned. Well, you only get aligned by actually truly knowing yourself. I had to do a lot of inside work before. Now I get to do the outside work. It was a whole lot of fun. But when you're balanced, the line is bold, courageous, enduring, protective, and you can just feel the presence. The lamb is empathetic, has emotional stability, emotional regulation, emotional control.

When you say, what was the greatest shift? I actually would say, in today's words, it was learning that I had to also become one part lion and one part lamb, which is something my grandfather said, gosh, a decade ago.

It's hard for guys like you and me to be a lamb.

Yeah, it is. It is.

It's a tough pill as well. Let's talk about, you went from homeless to building multiple eight-figure companies, not just one. What did rock bottom actually look like for you? And how did you get out of rock bottom?

Yeah, well, I'll say this much. I didn't build those companies overnight, first of all. I had a lot of growth process. I don't have a high school background. I didn't finish high school. I dropped out early to help family pay the bills at the time. My decision. I was just tired of the lights getting cut off and the water being cold and whatever. I was given an opportunity by my first mentor to build a company. He bought me everything, did everything for me. I made a bunch of money really fast. Before long, I got cocky, I got arrogant, I got I'm involved with the wrong person. Next thing you know, a year later, I'm a little bit kicking dirt and looking at the stars and not living my best life. What was really interesting about that is the company that I sold in late 2023 was the company I founded after a bit of a divine encounter almost ending my life. I told you I'm here for... One of the things I'm actually here for is a promise to Live conference. I was one of the speakers there.

You went to that phase recently, suicidal.

Well, no, that was a couple of decades ago. That was before I started the company, that particular thing. However, I have had to confront my shadow side many times. Here's the crazy part. Most of us resist the shadow side rather than learning to embrace and love the shadow side, because then you get integration. Then you get grounded, you're present, you're ready to rock and roll. But in the grand scheme of things, when people say, How did you become homeless? I was pride and arrogance. At the end of the day, it's pride and arrogance all day long. It was dumb, it was foolish, I was an idiot. When When you say, How did I go and build several companies? Some of them were doing upwards close to nine figures on top of our annual revenue and all this stuff. I really had to sit with that. I really had to sit with that. Because I can give you the cliché answer, I want to build an amazing team, which we did, but I also struggled to build an amazing team with my own leadership style for a long time. We just outserved the marketplace. We did, but that's not the truth.

They say that the businesses fail for a variety of different reasons. Top five are typically lack of sales, lack of leadership, lack of market penetration, poor product placement, so on and so forth. I've discovered it's a lot simpler than that. This is one of the things that I've been beating like a drum for the last two months is I believe there's five constraints in building a company, building yourself. They control your behavior. They influence your behavior more than anything else. They are the very thing that when you make a bad decision that you weren't expecting to make and you go, why did I know better? Why did I do that? These things are the things that are at play. The first one is arrogance. Is getting super confident, super cocky where you're at and not realizing that next year might not be the same as this year.

It's the hardest thing I deal with when I'm recruiting new people to come to a company. It's arrogance, pride, ego.

Yeah. The crazy part about it is, is typically, if you have a strong ego and you have a strong arrogance piece, you're actually masking a massive insecurity. You speak up to be louder than everybody else, so you can somehow put yourself ahead. It's a weird vibe, and everybody sees it but you. When I was in that season, everybody saw it but me. I thought I was doing X, Y, and Z for X, Y, and Z reason, and I realized that people judge us by our actions. We always judge ourselves by our intentions. That was a huge thing. But the polar opposite of arrogance is honestly humility. I believe everyone will go through a humbling. Either it's by choice, meaning you're choosing to look at your blind spots, look at the areas that you need to improve or can't approve. You're out of where you're trying to become more self-aware, or life is going to smack you with it at some point in time. Again, I've got friends. I've had clients that are seven, eight-figure earners, all kinds of stuff, and Their biggest moments of transition and difficulty had nothing to do with money. They had money.

It was identity. It was worth. Then you look at the second constraint, which is ignorance. You don't know what you don't know. You think you know what you don't know, or you're unwilling to look at for what you don't know. We've been very fortunate in business and done some cool things, but I've also been very stupid in business.

You still am sometimes.

Yeah, I mean, dude, I do stupid with dollar signs, and trying really hard not to do that stuff anymore. I'll use this word, suspected embezelment about $1. 7 million in the early, well, the early mid 2000s. I have bought stuff I shouldn't have bought. I have invested money in places I shouldn't have invested. I have not listened to wise counsel. That's a combination of ignorance and arrogance. How do you overcome ignorance? It's teachability. You have to be willing to humble yourself, to learn from people who have the character qualities that you admire, but are also doing the things that you want to do. When you dig into that, you can really build something amazing. The third one, I think, is probably the one that we all deal with. I call it impatience. You and I joked about this, I think on my show a little bit, but I was at an event. I can't remember how many. It was several months ago. It was a long time ago. I was given the opportunity to speak to the group a little bit. I said, by show of hands, Everybody raise your hand. I said, By show of hands, who in this room feels like you should be further ahead than you actually are?

And dude, every single hand went up. It wasn't even 99 %. It was every stinking hand, right? And it's because we're impatient. We want it now. We want it now. We want it now. We want it now. I know you've got some really cool projects that you're working on. We talked about a little bit off air. I'm sure part of you is like, I just want to see it finished now. I want to go ahead and jump into it.

Yeah, I mean, let's get it rolling. But that's the mindset I am. It's like, I'm We're launching. We went in, we're launching. Saw the vision, and boom, let's roll.

What do you think the opposite or the antidote to impatience is? Out of curiosity, what do you think it is?

That's a really tough question because the antidote to impatience is really humility.

It's definitely tied to it. I would say, from my definition, would be its presence. And the reason I think it's presence is because presence, it forces you to be in the moment now. And if you're in the moment now, you're going to be taking actions and making decisions based on a strategy rather than reactivity. See, I was actually coaching an entrepreneur, literally on the airplane on the way here. And they're awesome. They got a massive heart. They have the ability to build a good-size business. They They love their team. They love their family. They're just good people. At the same time, I'm laying out a strategy. I'm like, Hey, this is the strategy that we need to execute on to get you from here to here. And we start building out the strategy. Well, four steps in the strategy. Well, can we just skip step five, please? No, just give me step five. Just give me step five. I'll take care of step five for you. I'm like, No, I'm not going to give you step five. We're going to follow the strategy. And the reason I'm doing that is because I'm forcing every entrepreneur that we work with to be present.

Yes, make a one year goal. We want to increase revenue by X. We want to build this team. We want to have this new building. We want to do this. And have the goal. But if you're not taking a daily strategy step towards that goal every stinking day, and you're just always chasing this new shiny thing, you're never going to build a sizable, scalable business. Yeah.

I think that's the problem and the failure of every entrepreneur is the impatience and their lack of being present in the moment because everybody's worried about success now. But what people fail to enjoy is the process. And Gary Vee said this. That's what he attributes his success to all the time. It's like, I love the process. I love the process. I love the process.

I'm learning to fall in love with the process. I haven't quite got to Gary's standard yet.

Yeah, but I'm starting to embrace that. I think with my next couple of ventures, it's just because you don't... I love the process now because I don't need to do it. It's easy to love the process if you're going to rely on the process.

That's very true.

I love this process. It's fun. The game is cool. I'm over here thinking, my next venture, how am I going to get my kids involved? This would be something they could get behind.

That actually makes me think of something really interesting. One of One of the things that coincides with impatience and what you just described is what I refer to as you're so lost in your fear, which is actually one of the other constraints, meaning that you're starting to dilute your focus. What's the best way I can explain this?

Fear is the biggest constraint.

It's massive.

Because an entrepreneur, his backs against the wall. Yeah.

Well, here's the crazy part.

If it's not a successful entrepreneur.

Here's the crazy part. One of our mutual friends, Glenn Stearns, he's always talking about abundance. It's easy for him to talk about abundance. I know, but he also... If you know his story, it's not like he didn't walk into it.

No, he didn't. But he's been pretty successful for a long time.

Yeah, for sure. Here's where I was going with that. The word scarcity. I found, that's my Southern boy coming out right now in North Carolina. I found that if I operate in scarcity, I make dumb decisions. In other words, I'm going to try to solve an immediate problem that feels uncomfortable in my soul right now rather than saying, okay, how is this going to affect me financially, relationally, marketplace, legally, et cetera. That's what I'm getting. That's what I'm trying to help our entrepreneurs understand to get into presence. You have to slow things down. That's why I start my day the way I start my day. Because without that, I'm going like every entrepreneur on the planet. I'm still getting after it. I'm still like, Putting the phone up, doing the deals, doing the emails, investing in this AI thing and doing that, and doing this. You lose fulfillment when you're operating in what I refer to as the traditional hustle culture, which is anxious energy just thrown at a wall. Waking up at 4: 00 AM just to wake up at 4: 00 AM. Because somebody you watched online says, Wake up at 4: 00 AM.

That's how you're going to become successful. What if you slept till 5: 30, you got a good night's rest, so your brain is actually fed with oxygen and rest, And then made intentional decisions. You see what I'm saying? It's a different type of philosophy that I'm trying to help people understand with the one part lion, one part lamb, integrated integration method. It's about becoming The authentic you. The authentic you, believe it or not, is the magnetic you. You've had a lot of success on social media. You've had a lot of success in business. You got a lot of success in the marketplace. The crazy part is, the more you continue on on their own journey of becoming more and more authentic, the more and more it's going to be, the bigger it's going to get over and over again. These types of things are super important. People, I think they get so focused on trying to solve the immediate problem in their life that they'll sell their soul for a bowl of porridge, which is a Bible reference from Esa. There's a character in the Bible named Jacob who ended up becoming the nation of Israel.

Obviously, that's a huge nation. Jewish people, Christian people everywhere, it's basically out of this lineage. But Esa was not the first born. I'm sorry, Esa was the first born. Jacob was not the first born. The first born, the inheritance was supposed to go to Esa. But Esa gave his inheritance away because he was hungry in the moment. So he gives his entire legacy, his entire inheritance to Jacob. Jacob goes and builds a nation with it long term. You see what I'm saying? If we get so wrapped up in trying to get this one problem solved in this very moment now, a lot of times we're not thinking, Where is this going to affect me a year from now, two years from now, three years from now, five years from now? Where's my heart at in this? That thing. Anyway, I'll give you the last two because we've already bounced around them. Just to make sure I do that for your audience so they don't get mad at both of us. The last two is insecurity and fear. At my worst leading companies, I led from a place of insecurity. I had no high school diploma, had no college background, and here I was building a multimillion dollar organization from sheer will and hope and faith.

I'm just building it. Then I get to about $20 million in top-line revenue. Then I realized, holy crap, this thing is way outside of my control. I don't know how I'm leading. I was hiring great people, people that had CPA and MBA and all these different acronyms behind their names and all this cool stuff. But they would come to give me a great idea, and I would shut the down because it wasn't my idea, which is there's the arrogance again. Why was I doing that? Because I was insecure. I felt like if I wasn't my idea, that was the only thing I was bringing to the table, which wasn't true. Obviously, I built a business where they got there. At the same time, if you suppress your superstars, they will leave. If you're going to build a scalable organization so you can actually have the freedoms that we now get to enjoy, you have to have a team that is, for lack of a better word, they're ride or die with you.

That's evident in my company here. People that work for me here have been with me for three companies.

Oh, yeah. 20 years. I watch them walk over and give you a big hug. Believe it or not, that one little thing tells me a lot about culture. Yeah.

Culture is everything. It's building a company where I was just telling my director of marketing, I'm going to build a company just because... I mean, the guy who puts on my podcast, because I want to see more success, more abundance for you. Because me just having you work hourly That's not fair to you. But I think I could create something around you that can allow you- You can create entrepreneurs.

Yeah.

Because that's what it's about. It's like God gave me these resources and abilities and the ability to bless others. My favorite thing to do is to bless people who serve the Lord because I know what they're going to do with the money. I know what they're going to do with their heart. I know what they're going to do with their talents. It's a fortunate place that we're in, especially because we can identify the talent that loves and seeks the Lord.

It's really interesting. I'm glad you brought that up. Here's a thought. I got this question one time. I was at another event, and somebody says, Hey, what's the difference between a seven-figure entrepreneur and an eight-figure entrepreneur? Your knee-jerk reaction was, Duh, money. But it's the same thing that happened when it's not money. It's funny. My first mentor, the guy that gave me a second chance I didn't deserve, he always told me the answer is always the way you think. There's truth in that, too. Even when I'm about to share.

But the other thing that came from that was seven-figure entrepreneurs are always looking to earn. They're just earning, earning, earning, earning, earning hour time turn into four? How do I make this $1 turn into 100? How do I make this one relationship turn into six? Yeah, that's why I podcast. That's why I create content. Because I generate 3,000 to 400,000 views a day, minimum. It's like, Where else can I do that? Yeah, that's right. I can't go talk to an individual. It's one to one. Talk 300, 400, 1,000 people a day, much easier. Yeah, for sure. Sit in front of a camera all day. It's much easier reaching an audience.

Well, that and They say you attract who you are. But I've experienced you attract who you are. But historically, if you're attracting people you're going to serve, they're three levels behind where you were. They're three years behind you. So whatever insight offering. It's like you three years ago. One of the things that I used to say from stage all the time, I don't say it as much anymore because it's said in 10 different ways by 10 different people when whatever is the greatest purpose in life you ever have is serving the person you used to be. But it's all the versions of yourself. The reason I create content, because I remember being the scared entrepreneur. I remember trying to make payroll. I remember having to fire somebody that I wasn't sure was going to take it very well or fire somebody I didn't want to fire.

In California, nobody takes it well. Everybody goes and seeks unemployment in the lawsuit right after.

We have to look at your exit program.

If you're in California and you're an entrepreneur, don't fire them.

Well, so much for talking me and to come moving to California.

They make it tough here. Yeah. But we work our way around. We outsource a lot.

Yeah. Why? You build a good business.

This company has thousands and thousands of people, but headquarters is X amount of people. But we're independent contractors nationwide. And then however Too many people overseas. Which is like, I can keep scaling.

As long as you have the process, the systems, the culture, an integrated leader, you can scale any damn thing.

That's right.

Anything.

I try to be super integrated. I'm in the weeds. I'm in the weeds with my team. Now, let me ask you, you went through a lot of pain. When do you think your pain turned into your calling?

I think it's always turning into my calling. If I'm being honest, If you're really serving the person you used to be and you've done that numerous times, I believe in something called Lifegates. You ever heard the term Lifegates before? No. There's a book written by a guy by the name of Tom Patterson. He created something called Life Plan. If you did lifeplan. Com, you'd find it. He's either passed away or he's in his 90s. He's an older guy. He's one of the, I guess, co-inventors of the ATM machine. That's how long he's been around. He's a person of faith, and he taught a principle called the Four Domains, which is like spiritual, financial, emotional relationship. He's the one that I borrowed him and a good friend of mine, Chris LaCrodo. I borrowed a term. He called him the Four Helpfuls. People call it different things. I call it the Questions of Discernment. So anytime you're confused about what to do, you just sit down on a paper and pen and you basically ask four questions, right? About anything in life. What's right, what's wrong, what's confusing, and what's missing. Out of that, if you spend enough time, you will get clarity just by that one exercise.

It may not give you the exact next step, But it's going to say, Oh, I need to aim over here, right? I say all that to say that he taught this principle called Lifegate. When we are growing up, there's a first moment we take our first step. There's a first moment we ride our first bike. There's a first moment we kiss our first partner. There's all these different first. Those are considerably lifegates. Unfortunately, in my case, that was the first time I got married. That was the first time I got divorced. I was like, that thing. Not So every lifegate is great. But what the life...

Some of those lifegates are really tough.

It's like super tough, right? Man, I felt like getting beat with my arm ripped off and hit me with it. Yeah, that was fun. Anyway, let's move on. I don't want to go back down that memory journey too far. But life gates are the crucible moments in which everything changes. Either you gain insight, self-worth, identity, all this stuff as a byproduct of that good event or the not-so-good event, or Or you go deeper into victimhood, self-loathing, self-esteem issues, et cetera. So that's why I believe I'm always becoming the calling. The only difference is what's getting clearer for me is it's becoming increasingly more aware that the people that I tend to coach and mentor and lead, the crazy part is, is they're already leaders. They're already leading organizations that have 100 people, 200 people, seven figures, eight figures. They're just like, Dude, how? They respect what I built outside of this arena. I respect what they built inside of their current arena or a prior arena. But the core difference is when we're working one-on-one, it's like, We need to get you happy. Because here's the thing. I was a good... In fact, I had another guy I wanted to introduce you to.

A guy named Troy Hoffman you have on your show. He helps entrepreneurs get ready to sell and exit. He's an amazing guy. You love him to death. Maybe you guys already know each other. Maybe you guys already know each other.

Here in Orange County?

No, I think he's based in Puerto Rico now. But I think he spent some time in Cali. He's just a great guy. But he and I were talking in an event recently, and he's like, Hey, what do you do? For the first time in my life, this actually shook out. This is, again, where clarity can happen just by paying attention. He goes, What do you do? I said, Honestly, I hope great leaders find their meaning after they've made a bunch of money.

That's a great-Think about it. Yeah. Man's quest for meaning is something that we all are always on. And I realized it's very easy to find your meaning if you're rooted in the Lord.

Yeah. Period.

From there, he just directs you. Yeah.

Inheritworth.

Yeah.

But yet we like to look outside of ourselves for it.

Yeah. And now, exactly. And I think someone... Actually, it was one of my videographers. He's like, you're seeking the... You have influencer syndrome. So right now, I have validation issues. Divorced. Now, it's like, I just want lots of attention from the opposite sex. If I'm not getting that, I'm like, What's going on?

At least you're transferring on to somebody. That's good. What you see is what you get.

Yeah, my influencer syndrome. I'm like, Oh. It's the reality. I battle this, right? I need to be more rooted in the Lord. More. I'm trying. Dude, I Bible study every day. This every day. Prayers.

But see, as your brother, here's where I'd push a little bit. I would say, Okay, why is it more activity rather than more stillness?

Yeah.

Maybe it's more about stillness than activity. Because as achievers, and the reason I say this as a brother is because this is me all day long until I learned this new method, literally the last year and a half. I spent my entire life chasing, earning, earning validation, earning appreciation, earning the need to be seen, be heard, be valued, be appreciated. I self-abandoned, I self-sacrificed. I was always on go. I was always striving.

To do that, you self-sabotage.

Yeah, a thousand times. A thousand times. It wasn't until I started being still that I started actually feeling what we refer to as the presence of the Lord or the Lord being the Holy spirit working inside of us. Or I didn't feel it.

How do you be still? Do you sit and pray? I mean, I try to be still. I try to pray.

You're not going to like my answer. You're not going to like my answer.

No, nothing good you like.

I'll tell you this. The last major life gate I've gone through, keep in mind, my life's not over, so there's a chance that I'll go through a couple of you more. I hope not. But the last major life gate I through was forcing myself to be present and still. Like, literally, which is why I start off with the mantra every morning. I try to make it slow. I try not to get up and rush out the door or whatever. Remember, if I need to get up an hour early to make sure I get that practice in place before I go conquer something. I did it this morning before I jumped on an airplane at 04: 00 AM. Because to get here in time for the podcast, flying from the East Coast, it's a five, six hour flight, depending on how the winds are. I still did my mantra this morning. I still went outside and walked on the grass, even in the dark. It's just a moment to hear the wind. Here's the way in which I was able to get to a place where in which I could find stillness. It's still a struggle for me.

I don't have it all figured out because my natural predisposition is go mode. I can build a business with the best of them.

I just try to even just do a morning routine of stretching and playing the Bible. I'll get that done two, three days a week. But if I do that every day, seven days a week, oh, man, I'm on fire.

I tell you what. As your brother, here's what I recommend you just try for 30 days. Then just send me a quick call or quick text. Let me know how it shakes out because it changed the game for me. It goes all the way back to the beginning of the show. I went to grab a journal. I went to be in quiet. The very first thing you do, you get out of bed. If you do some gratitude practice or something like that, this comes after that. But go find a quiet place place in the house that feels peaceful to you and do that journaling process. What I hear you say is, and just sit there for 15 or 20 minutes. Have a time. Take your phone, turn the time clock on, put it where you can hear it, but it's nowhere where you can check it.

I have journaling practice, too. It's a gratitude journal. When I do that, but everything is like, Oh, I need to do that or I need to stretch. But then I have this whole vitamin stack sequence. And then it's like my protein. Then it's like red light therapy. It's like this. If I don't get one hour to do all this, and I only get 15 minutes, then I'm going to prioritize the vitamins and the stuff that has to get done.

I'm going to ask you to stretch, man. Stretch is-No, not physically stretch. Stretch mentally, stretch emotionally, stretch spiritually. One of the things that came out of one of those journaling sessions was, and this is something that I feel like God was telling me-Describe or do you just do a gratitude journal? No, I wait till... I don't do any. I write, What I hear you say is, and I sit there with the ink pen until I hear something's coming from heaven, and then I start writing. The first time I did it, it happened super quick because I was going through a transition. So it was like, there was stuff to be over. Then there was times I would sit there for 10 minutes and nothing would sit there for Then I write the one word, and then the next word would form itself. Then I would go back and like... It was like all my things that I think is chaos in my life that I'm trying to solve, literally would come out of that journaling practice.

What I hear you say is.

What I hear you say is, which means what I hear you say is, which means we shut up, we stop the anxious activity, and we listen with intention. The very first time I did that was after that major transition I told you about before. A good buddy of mine, Henry Amar, he's the one that taught me how to do it. It's a quick six-minute meditation, quiet music, come out of it and just write, just free write. I had some really cool stuff all that. I did that same practice a week later in the middle of a little storm, so to speak. I get to the bottom. I get to the bottom of the page, and I'm like, poured my heart on paper to God, right? In the bottom of the page, I'm like, If you have anything to share with me, please share it now. I changed the font color to blue, and then I could not stop typing quick enough. And that became what I hear you say is journaling practice. I began to do with an ink pen and a pad. And if I showed you what it said, even today, it would blow your mind.

Because it's a very distinct voice difference. I'm not I'm talking about channeling spirits. I'm talking about letting the spirit talk to you. Because in that same blue document, it says this one really cool thing. It says, I am always talking, but my children are seldom listening. I trust you to listen. What if the other side of what's missing or what's confusing is simply what's listening, what you're not listening to or listening?

It's incredible. I can only imagine that. I'm sure that's what the the Apostles and all the saints that wrote the Bible.

That's what they said, praying the spirit. Dude, praying the spirit. Sometimes people think it's talking in tongues. It may be. But I think praying in the spirit has more to do with listening. Because you go to Daniel, right? So Daniel goes to go pray. He's praying for essentially a rescue, right? And he's sitting there and they say he's beseeched before the Lord, right? So he's there. He's sitting in quiet. He's David, same thing. He's already shared all the tears he can share, shed. He's done all he can do. He's repented. He's done everything he knows how to do. It's not until he stops doing and starts listening that God starts speaking. Why is it any different for David, for Jacob, for Noah, literally for Jesus? I believe that's why Jesus went off by himself all the time, so he could hear, which is why he heard so clearly. I I don't know. I really feel like it's a missing piece. I feel like because we don't slow down to do practices like that, all we have is chaos. We're constantly chasing chaos. We're chasing that creates chaos. We're chasing that creates chaos. We call in the wrong types of things in our life because we're chasing chaos.

We're chasing activity. I'm telling you, my spirit is more grounded now than it has ever been in my entire life. It's all because of that stillness. It's all about sitting still, doing the journaling practice. We talked at the beginning of the show about the girlfriend that I have who does not like being in the public eye, so I don't do a lot of shoutouts for her that. But one of the things that she does that I thought was really cool when I met her was she already does her own stillness stuff. When I was going through something or whatever, I would say, Hey, look, I'm going to go ground, which is not the... Grounding is nothing more than a code word to go be present and still. I'm going to go put my feet on the grass. I'm going to go sit in silence. I'm going to go try to get this anxious energy out of me. Sometimes I'll go, and just shake it out. There are times when she's had a couple of things going, she's like, I need to go for a walk. I'm like, Okay, cool. There are different forms of being still.

There are different forms. It's not necessarily the body has to be still, but the mind and the spirit have to be still. The easiest way to do that is to do the journaling practice, one. Two, later today, maybe sometime, this is for everybody watching and listening, go out. California is beautiful, dude. This place has the most unbelievable weather.

We pay a weather tax.

I know you pay a weather tax.

And we deal with a political climate that's also on. So we better embrace the weather.

Well, so here's the thing. Let's go enjoy the weather. So go outside, take your shoes off, put your feet on the grass, and then just pay attention to listening to the wind blow. I can watch the palm tree right outside that window right there.

You've learned to be still. I have not.

Well, that's just why I'm your brother and I'm saying, Hey, bro, follow me this way. You can still have it all, but you can also have that and meaning and peace.

Yeah. What is it all without peace? Nothing. What is it all without God? Nothing. Yeah.

The Bible talks about what good is it to gain the whole world and lose your own self or soul in the process. Yeah.

Nothing.

It's worth it. But that's what we do as humanity. We just strive and strive and strive and strive. What I'm saying, hey, look, strive, go do all you can do, have a beautiful life, try to see how far you can go. Don't let anybody else's label come on you that you feel like whatever. But go ahead and if you want to tive something, you have no money, tive your spirit. Just be still. The other thing I was going to mention to you before that you shared, I'll try to shut up. You just got me all fired up, man. I love hanging out with you. You mentioned something about obviously having been through a divorce, right? Yeah. Here's what I decided to do. I decided to not wear any labels anymore. I just decided.

What does that mean? You're not divorced.

Well, I got divorced. A divorce occurred. A divorce happened. But that doesn't make me necessarily a divorce. Yeah, exactly. If I take that identity, then what will happen is every relationship that I have coming in my way, I'm likely to sabotage because I'm going into the relationship with a sense of insecurity and low self-worth because of an event. Let's just face it, very seldom, can happen, but very seldom, is it one person's responsibility while a marriage will end. There's lots of little slices and cuts along the way. Yeah. Harse words, silent moments. It definitely takes two. Exactly. It's like, if I wish my former spouse well, and I genuinely like, Hey, look, I hope life gets really good for you. If I can get to that place, and I'm really wishing that, then why am I going to wear my label as if I have a bear of shame? The whole reason Jesus came was to help us with the things that we screw up. The whole reason he came was because he knew that we were human in such a way that we legitimately don't have the self control and discipline to turn every single evil thing away from our life.

We really don't.

No, we don't. But what we do have is we have the ability to integrate, have connection. As you integrate the things that you once chased to fill a void, you no longer chase to fill the void. And now the void can be filled by the thing it's supposed to be filled by, which is in my case, your case, Jesus and the Holy spirit. And then you don't worry about self-worth anymore. I don't have to proof it. And this is just being honest. I used to spend my entire life trying to prove. Here's a cool thing. Technically, on paper, I've already done the impossible. I ain't got a damn thing to prove to anybody. Not a damn thing. I'm just being honest. I'm out here trying to help people and serve people because I want to. I want people to have fulfillment. I want them to have peace. I want them to have love. I want them to have joy.

We're past the point of having to make money to survive. Let me ask you a couple last questions. Sure. It's about goals.

Yeah.

Three-prong question. What's a personal goal that you have for yourself? A goal that you have for your family and a goal that you have for Unstoppable.

All right. The goal I have for myself is one part lion, one part lamb. A leader's guide to rise, lead, and last will come out probably the mid part of next year, give or take. Already got the domain stuff. The manuscript's already done. Book proposals. I love the name. Thanks, bro.

I can't believe you got that name.

I work all the domain and everything. In fact, it's a whole brand. A lot of the workout stuff I wear online is our logos and stuff like that. But I would like to have that book enter into a million hands. And I'm totally okay with giving the proceeds to the charity or something like that, if that's God's will. Totally okay with it. Because what's inside of those pages is what's inside of my heart. It's inside of my experiences. It's inside of everything that I've built, everything that I've done, everything I've walked through, every fire, every trial, every joy, every blessing. And I believe, just like Steve Myrick, my first mentor, Old Man Myrick, gave me a second chance. I think that book will give people a second chance to live a life they were supposed to live, not the life that they were told they were supposed to live, which is a big difference. Personal goal for my family. I want to be Steve Myrick to them. So what I mean by that? In short, I want to leave a legacy inside of them, not just around them. I want them to grow up and be men and women of character and honesty and want to help the world and want to do good in the world.

I want them to pursue their callings. They don't have to make it. My oldest son is a history teacher and loves it. He wants to be a professor. My other son wants to be an entrepreneur all day long. They got different goals. Both of them can be massively successful regardless of what's in their checkbook. I want them to find their thing, find their niche. I want them to be responsible. All my wealth is going to be tied up into a trust, and that trust is going to protect who gets what and how they get it and what they have to do to get it and all that thing, because I want to make sure that That legacy on paper doesn't erode after the third generation, which is the average. You and I work our butts off to create something from scratch. By the time we get to our grandchildren, Little Ocean, who just was born a few months ago, actually on my girlfriend's birthday, which is cool. He, in theory, may or may not have access to me by the time he's an adult, basically. By the time he's eligible for trust. I want there to be parameters in trust to protect how he uses money before he can even access it.

I want to have a stewardship, right? So it comes down to stewardship, legacy inside, legacy outside, and essentially the world a better place. Unstoppable solutions. My primary goal for Unstoppable solutions is to, I think, one, give leaders a voice that need to be heard. I'm a big believer that some of the most important voices on the planet have yet to be heard. And I'm not taking anything away from some of our friends who are very successful in thought leadership and stuff like that. They've added tremendous value, and that won't stop. But these are voices that speak to a heart and not just a business concept or a strategy or a framework. So I would say give leaders a voice. I want the content that we create to add value to the world and not subtract value from the world. I don't have to make a dollar. If I serve well, I probably will, and that's okay. But I don't have to. I want the content to stand on its own two legs. The fact that you gave me an opportunity to hang out with you and just be this vulnerable and honest with you, I can't thank you enough for.

Because I'm hoping people are listening and watching and getting something from it, bro. I think those are probably my three goals.

Last question. When you're in front of the proly gates, what do you think God's going to tell you?

God, I hope he just says good and faithful, well done, honestly. That's what I'm hoping to hear. It's funny. Here's a dark but helpful tool that plays into that. I was once asked to write my epitaph, or write your life... You write your hero life story. If you were to live your best life, you write that on paper. When you get all that done, you get them out of the epitaph. I want my epitaph to say, Here lies a wonderful husband, an amazing father, and also someone who set out to change the world and did. And whatever capacity that has.

I feel like everybody should write their epitaph. God bless you, bro. I hope you hit every single one of your goals. You're a man of faith, a true servant leader. If people want to connect with you, how do they find you?

First of all, thank you. I love you, man. I really appreciate you inviting me over to SoCal for this. The easiest way is to go to stevenscoggins. Com. That's what a PH. So Steven, S-E-P-H-E-N, Scoggins, S-C-O-G-G-I-N-S. Com. If they are looking for more alignment in their life, they can just add a backslash or a slash and write the word alignment. So steven davinscauagans. Com/alignment. That will take them to a tool that will help them figure out how aligned they are. And the best part is, I ain't selling you nothing. Let's go.

Let's do it. Steven Scoggins, make sure you connect with him. Find him on social as well. This guy's a beast, a mentor to millions. Please check him out. Thank you. Thanks for tuning in, guys.